


Money Can Buy You Love. And Glitter

by CamilleCarelli



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), American Idol RPF, Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-17
Updated: 2012-12-18
Packaged: 2017-11-16 13:10:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 61
Words: 448,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/539781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CamilleCarelli/pseuds/CamilleCarelli
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU with humor, dialogue, sex, romance and some angst. Happy ending. Begins approximately three years after Adam Lambert won Season 8 of American Idol. He has a successful career, but after a string of failed relationships, has more or less given up on romance and is focusing on his career to the point of being a workaholic. He still has trouble with inappropriate appearances of the glambulge during performance and still loves glitter. Kris Allen is a singer/guitarist from Arkansas who moved to LA nearly two years ago to try and break into the business and get away from a small town and family life that became untenable after he came out of the closet. He's just about ready to give up hope of making it into the business. He's still wearing plaid. Like everyone, they are dealing with the aftermath of life not proceeding according to expectations and hoping that Plan B will work out even better than Plan A.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meet Cute in Coffee Shop

**Author's Note:**

> _Italics = flashbacks_  
>  This story will range in rating from G to NC-17, based upon sexual situations.

**Money Can Buy You Love. And Glitter: Chapter 1: Meet Cute in Coffee Shop** Rating: PG 

 

_"Mr. Allen. We regret to inform you that we don't foresee signing you at this time."_

_"Oh." Kris sighed and sat down heavily on the ugliest chair in the world. He had sold his ratty sofa at a tag sale, so the mushroom chair was his only choice. Lack of choices was the story of his life for a while now. This agent had been his last hope. He'd been here for two years, gone through every label, indie to mainstream, every agent, and this agent had been the only one to give him a call back and now this. How much worse could it get?  
_

 

"Do you have the money or not?" The barista asked impatiently, her eyes flicking to the line no doubt forming behind him. She reached for the cup in warning. "It's just thirty-eight cents." 

"Uh-oh..." Kris groaned in embarrassment. He felt a flush begin to crawl up his neck and cover his face. Turning out his pockets, desperately hoping to find the last thirty-eight cents, he heard only the sound of his own panicked pulse and... someone chewing gum way too loudly.

"I'll get it, Sandy," a voice said behind him directed at the barista, while a ring-covered hand held up a bill. "The whole thing. Just add it to my order."

"I can't--" Kris spun around and nearly stumbled as he looked up. Way up. Holy fucking shit. It was Adam Lambert. Who was really tall. Offering to pay for his coffee? He gaped in astonishment. Ohmigod. The guy was even hotter up close and personal. The guy who was --"You're Adam Fucking _Lambert_!"

"Shhh." Adam put his finger over Kris' lips, because... well... they were nice lips and life was short. Just like this guy. Nice lips, short, great ass. And yeah, he'd been looking while standing behind him, watching him fumble in his pockets and pull his nearly threadbare jeans tighter across that ass. Of course he'd been looking -- he might be exhausted, but he wasn't dead. "Yes, that's me. And yes, I can afford to buy you your coffee and yes, you're going to let me. Put your money in your pocket."

"Thanks. I appreciate the thirty-eight cents, but I'll pay the rest of it..." Kris mumbled, looking down at his sneakers, then gasping as Adam Fucking Lambert -- holy crapsticks -- shoved his money into Kris' pocket -- oh hell, Adam Fucking Lambert's hand was in his pocket. He was still gaping when Adam Fucking Lambert handed over a bill and told the barista to keep the change. This could not be a good first impression.

"It's okay, man." Adam smiled down in what he hoped was a reassuring manner given how mortified the shorter man appeared. "Been there, done that. I had my times when I was scrounging the sofa cushions for change to buy a pack of gum."

"You and your gum. One of life's essentials." The thin blonde woman next to them rolled her eyes as she reached for the two cups on the counter and handed one to Adam who was too distracted by playing white knight to the cute peasant boy. She took a sip hiding her grin and thinking she really needed to start writing these ideas down for Adam's video shoot concepts folder. 

"It is!" Adam protested with a grin as he herded them away from the line. "It keeps me from taking a bite out of insolent personal assistants."

"I'm so scared," she scoffed before smiling back, then turning to Kris. "Hi, I'm Lane, Adam's PA. You obviously know who Adam is. And you are?"

"I... I'm Kris Allen. And thank you," Kris said, looking anywhere but at Adam. He had met Adam Lambert, which was awesome, totally awesome. Adam Lambert had just bought him coffee, which was embarrassing, totally embarrassing. He groaned, "I could die."

"Hey, it's okay...." Adam said softly, patting the guy's shoulder. Okay, maybe it was an excuse to touch him, because he was cute, but still. He had pure motivations. Mostly. "I'm just paying it forward. I don't know what I would have done without the kindness of friends and family when I was struggling. So now I can do the same for others."

"I'm a stranger," Kris protested. Although he'd like to be anything but a stranger to Adam Lambert, because seriously the guy was even more gorgeous than he'd imagined -- those _eyes._ And he seemed genuinely nice. It just seemed wrong to --

"Well, there's no need to get all Blanche DuBois about it," Adam teased. "But seriously, no big deal. Hey..." He paused and then continued more cautiously. "I'm on a break from a session. Or some meetings. Or a photo shoot. Or something. I don't even know any more. Hence the need for caffeine. So. Would you like to sit down?"

 

"What are you trying to break into? Acting or singing or dancing?" Adam asked after they'd sat down at a small table, Lane at the table next to them in some vain attempt at pretending to give him privacy and Kris seemed lost in contemplating how red his cheeks could get. 

"Singing. But how'd you know?" Kris' head snapped back to Adam. He couldn't believe he was sitting with Adam Fucking Lambert. All the times he'd fantasized about meeting him and now... It had been that easy? And that humiliating?

"Everyone's trying to be someone they're not in LA. Or someone they're not yet. Or something they want to be." Adam shrugged.

Kris blanched. "That's... cynical." And also, true, he added silently after a second's thought.

"Which is something I'm not. Just honest and if the truth appears cynical, doesn't mean it's not the truth."

Kris nodded and squirmed a little as Adam's gaze focused on his face. He touched the back of his neck self-consciously. "Just as if the truth appears Pollyannish, doesn't mean it's not the truth."

"Exactly." Adam tilted his head, studying Kris' face. "Have we met previously?"

Kris shook his head. "No. Believe me, I'd remember meeting you." He blushed. "Sorry. I have to admit that I'm a fan, so it's a thrill..."

"Thank you, but please don't..." Adam waved his hand dismissively while watching Kris' face closely. "I'm just a regular guy."

"You have _glitter_ all over your clothes," Kris said drily.

Adam grinned. He'd been experimenting with a look for his next tour and having some photos taken for later review. At least Kris wasn't so intimidated by or eager to please a celebrity that he couldn't tease. "And that's not normal?"

"Well, not in Arkansas."

"Well, Toto, you're not in Arkansas any more."

"No shit. In Arkansas glamrock stars aren't walking into Starbucks."

Adam laughed. "So not true. On the Idols Tour a couple of years ago, we stopped in Little Rock and I went in a Starbucks there."

"Trailing glitter?" Kris pointed at the circle of sparkles surrounding Adam. He could write a song about the image, he thought, then winced. That sounded a little too much like that old Carpenters' song, _Close to You_. What was next, asking why birds suddenly appeared when Adam got near? Get a grip. As Adam had said, underneath all that glitter, he was just a regular guy. Just keep remembering that, Kris and maybe, you'll make it through this with a great memory and maybe... something more.

"Maybe you come in here often and I've seen you," Adam pressed, unwilling to let it go. "I have a really good memory for faces."

Lane nodded. "Amazing memory, in fact." She lowered her voice to a soft whisper and leaned over to say in Adam's ear, "Especially for cute boys with southern accents --"

"And good butts," Adam whispered back although he was focused on Kris' face. The guy had perfect skin, which was so unfair. Great eyes too. Where had he seen him before?

"I heard that!" Kris blurted out, cursing silently when he felt a flush heat his face. God, he must look like a total rube, blushing at what was actually a compliment. C'mon, he told himself. Adam Fucking Lambert had just said he had a good butt. For any number of reasons, that was amazing.

"Oops!" Adam and Lane said in unison, unrepentent. Kris stared from one to the other. Lane was obviously more than just a PA, she must be a trusted friend as well.

" _But_ I don't think that's the feature I'm recalling..." Adam said slowly with a wink. "The face..."

Kris thought quickly, then nodded. "Oh. Maybe at the record label? I did send over a demo with a headshot." He fell silent.

"Those cost bucks," Adam interjected when Kris said no more.

"You're not kidding." Kris winced. "But a good investment. I hope. Eventually."

"Yeah..." Adam stared at Kris. 

"You... have a really intense stare, you know?" Kris asked, laughing nervously and turning his head to the side.

"Sorry." Adam smiled as the profile view did jog his memory. "Wait! I did see your head shot. It was on a table...yeah, that's it. On a table with a whole bunch of aspiring artists. Did you--"

Kris shook his head. "No, I didn't get signed. A little session work. But is that what they do -- spread us all out on a table?"

Adam opened his mouth, then snapped it closed and avoided looking over at Lane.

"What were you going to say?" Kris asked curiously, seeing the mischief in Adam's eyes which made him smile in response. He felt... warm inside just being with him. Seriously, why the hell didn't this guy have a boyfriend?

"Something no doubt obscene," Lane quipped as she held up a ripped-out page from a magazine and then began cutting it. 

"What is she doing?" Kris asked, scrunching up his nose as he tried to figure it out. "Making a scrapbook? Or getting ready to make a scrapbook?"

"Yeah." Adam felt a blush cover his cheeks. Damn it, being a redhead was such a pain in the ass.

"Seriously?" Kris began to laugh. "For -- Oh wait. I know. For your mom?"

Adam raised an eyebrow in surprise. "How did you know?"

"If I ever got famous, my mom would totally want a scrapbook. Or two or ten." Kris smiled up at Adam. They were honestly talking about their moms and scrapbooks? So not what he expected a conversation with Adam Lambert to be like.

"Oh, my mom has scrapbooks from before Idol," Adam admitted, feeling his cool rating ratchet down with every word out of his mouth. But might as well get the truth out of the way at the beginning. The only thing glam about him was his glitter. 

Kris grinned and leaned forward to confide, "Mine too. She has scrapbooks for my brother's cheerleading and no, don't ask!" Kris laughed when Adam snapped shut the mouth he'd opened. "And from the time I won that contest..." Oh why oh why had he brought that up.

"What contest?" Adam pounced, seeing the chagrin in Kris' face.

"A...nothing."

"C'mon. You can tell me."

Lane raised her voice. "Just tell him, Kris. He'll badger you to death or give you the pleading puppy dog face."

Kris laughed. "I think I wanna see the pleading puppy dog face. I think that's a fair exchange in return for giving you this totally embarrassing info."

"Adam..." Lane pointed at him, laughing softly when he immediately changed his face into a pathetic pout with big eyes.

Kris smiled and felt his own face soften. Good god, the man was irresistible. "Well, who could resist that?"

"So tell me now," Adam demanded crisply.

"Wow, you can change in a second from puppy dog to bossman," Kris muttered, then shrugged. "Okay. I was in the Little Mr. Little Rock contest."

"Did you win?" Lane asked, her scissors held still while she looked from Kris to Adam. 

"Maybe..." Kris' lips twitched. "Oh god, this is humiliating." 

"Little Mr. Little Rock?" Adam held back his amusement, until he saw the self-deprecatory amusement in Kris' face and burst out laughing, glad when Kris followed suit. "Seriously? DId you get a crown?"

"And a scepter--"

"That's adorable--" Adam began to laugh. "Let me guess. You were more interested in the scepter." 

"Why--- Oh!" Kris laughed as well. "Yeah, that was probably a sign. That and my total confusion about why boobs were so interesting." 

Silently taking in the thin cheeks and loose clothing, Adam looked over at the bakery case. Smiling, he asked, "Hey, are you hungry? I could eat something and I hate to eat alone."

"I...I'm good," Kris demurred, looking down at his coffee.

Feeling Adam's glare like a heat lamp against her hair, Lane looked up. "I could eat, Adam. If you don't mind..."

"That's why I asked. Are you sure, Kris?" Adam touched Kris' hand. "It's no problem. I was going to get up anyway..."

"No..." Kris said softly, staring at Adam's hand. 

"How about we share? Those muffins are huge and I have to watch my--"

"No, you don't," Kris said instanty and fiercely, turning his hand over to squeeze Adam's hard. "You look fantastic. My mama would actually say you need more meat on your bones."

"My bone has plenty of meat--" Adam quipped, while staring down at their enjoined hands. Apparently Kris was as touchy as he was. 

"Adam!" Lane gurgled with laughter and pointed at the bakery case. "Go get some muffins for all of us."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Have I mentioned how much I love your mother? She raised you boys right."

"Neil is available, you know," Adam joked. Neil and Lane growled at each other on a regular basis. 

Lane scrunched up her nose. "Pass. But I wouldn't pass up some coffee cake." 

"I'd be glad to get you some. If Kris will release my hand."

"Oh!" Kris groaned and flushed red. He pulled his hand away and rubbed it on his thigh, hoping his forehead was not as sweaty as his palms right now.

 

Kris looked over his shoulder to watch Adam walk away. Great ass. Day-ummm. "He doesn't need to lose weight."

Lane watched Kris watching Adam. She began, "I agree--"

"He's like the hottest guy on the planet." Kris shook his head. "It's ridiculous that he can't see it."

Body dysmorphia, Lane thought silently. Not that she was going to divulge that information to a guy -- cute as he might be or real as he might be -- they'd just met. "I agree," she said quickly.

"Really, he needs to work on overcoming that crap from high school," Kris said sympathetically.

Lane looked at Kris. He actually seemed... concerned. His eyes.... Real. Hmm. "You know about that because you've seen his interviews?" 

"Yeah." Kris blushed. "I... "

"You really are a fan." Lane tilted her head. Either this guy was a brilliant actor what with being able to blush on command or he was real.

"I'm not a creepy fan!" Kris protested. 

"Didn't think you were." Lane held up her scissors. "But just in case, I know how to use these."

Seeing the determination in Lane's face, Kris hissed in a breath. She would be a bad enemy. "Now, I'm scared." Kris put his arm across his lap.

Lane smiled. "You should be." She'd do whatever it took to keep the creeps, assholes and jerks away. But this guy... her instincts were telling her that he was real. Making a decision to go with her gut, she asked, "So. Are you going to ask him out?"

Kris spat his coffee out. "I beg your pardon?"

"Don't play games. You heard me."

"Should I?" Kris grabbed a napkin and wiped the table, wondering if it was possible to continually embarrass yourself.

"What do you have to lose?"

 

Adam smiled as Kris excused himself to go to the bathroom after eating two muffins.

"Nice boy. Nice ass," Lane said as they both looked over their shoulders to watch Kris walk toward the restrooms. "You totally need to ask him out," she said, as she carefully slid her scissors into a case and shoved them and magazines back in her oversized tote bag.

"Be careful with that Birkin bag!" Adam winced as she flung it onto the floor. "It cost me the earth and the waiting list took forever and--"

"Stop deflecting with your leather fetish. Ask the boy out."

"I dunno..." Adam prevaricated while rolling his muffin between his fingers until it was nothing more than inedible crumbs.

"Oh geez. Do I have to do it, the way I have to do everything for you? Or should I--"

"Oh zip it," Adam snapped, then immediately amended, "I meant that in the nicest possible way."

Cracking up, then watching the wistful look on Adam's face, Lane asked softly, "Adam, c'mon, why not? I know you're not shy and he seemed interested in you as a person. I mean, he admitted he was a fan but he wasn't creepy, you know? So why pass him up? I think you'd be crazy."

"I... never seem to meet nice boys," Adam admitted. "And I can't seem to tell... my nicedar is broken."

"I know. The star fuckers. The users." Lane said softly and sympathetically. The past two years would make even a romantic like Adam cynical. "Bu--"

"There's always something... wrong with them. They're hiding something--"

"Darling, I'm a nobody and it happens to me too. Men suck. Usually badly."

"I know. I sound like I'm having a pity party." Adam sighed. "I told you before -- I seem to have lost my ability to weed out decent guys from assholes because everyone wants something from me--"

"Well, thanks!" Lane huffed, while watching Adam closely. Leila was right - Adam was lonely and feeling a little isolated. She softened her tone. "At a certain point it seems easier to be alone?"

"Yeah." Adam looked down. "But..."

"That's not suitable for your temperament. That's why we're all always trying to set you up with guys." Lane paused. Some people could be perfectly happy without a partner; Adam was not one of them, as everyone in Adam's circle knew. She nodded in the direction of the bathrooms. "I say go for it this time. You can blame me and my faulty instincts. Because he seems nice. _Normal._ "

"Or as normal as a guy can be who's trying to make it in the entertainment business. Could you run a background check on him? If..."

"I can run a full background check on him," Lane offered, hating to see how suspicious Adam was becoming. "He has a really nice ass. And I know you noticed that."

"Well, d'uh. I may be nearly celibate, but I'm not dead."

"Nearly celibate?" Lane raised an eyebrow. "Isn't that an oxymoron?"

"Oxymoron? That word describes my sex life. I sleep with idiots and then feel the need to use one of those Oxy products to scrub myself clean."

"But lately...." Lane raised an eyebrow quizzically. "You haven't been calling infomercial numbers to order Oxyclean, have you?"

"But lately..." Adam drawled. "The closest I am to having sex is when my leather pants stretch over my erection when I'm performing."

"No wonder you're so careful with your leather." Lane smirked then blanched and looked meaningfully over Adam's shoulder.

"Don't tell me..." Adam whispered, closing his eyes.

"Oh tell me..." Kris whispered back and he shoved his phone into his pocket. He hesitated then slid his hand onto Adam's shoulder as he walked in front of him. Seeing the blush on Adam's cheeks, Kris had to smile even as he gathered his courage. "Or rather...tell me, if you'd be interested in going on a date sometime."

Adam felt his mouth drop open. No one ever asked him out. He looked over in shock at Lane, who was grinning broadly and nodding emphatically. "You.."

"I mean, I know I'm not famous or anything and..." Kris began then groaned as his other hand encountered the five dollars in his pocket, his grand life's savings, money he had only because Adam Fucking Lambert had paid for his coffee. "I don't have--"

"Oh, I pay for my dates," Adam said quickly, then laughed as Kris' eyes opened comically wide. "I didn't mean that the way it sounded."

"Well...." Kris lifted his shoulders. "Is that a yes or a no?"


	2. Treasure Map

**Chapter 2: Treasure Map Rating: PG**

 

**Grindddddddddddddd  
** Grindddddddddddddd _  
Grindddddddddddddd_

****

"I can't believe this!" Kris exploded, slamming his hands on the steering wheel. Damn it, he'd wanted, needed, to make a good impression and now his stupid truck wouldn't start? 

"I think you flooded it." Adam shrugged as he sat next to Kris in a truck so decrepit it must have come from a Dukes of Hazard prop auction. Poor guy. "So we'll take my car. No problem." 

"I asked you out," Kris insisted stubbornly, then sighed. Looking up apologetically, he spread his hands out. "I'm sorry. You're just trying to be nice and I'm--"

"Letting pride get in the way?" Adam suggested.

"Well, I was going to say that I was being a butthead, but your version sounds better."

"That's only true if the notion of my head meeting your butt is a bad idea."

Kris' mouth dropped open and he stared at Adam for a long moment, before a loud snort escaped his mouth, then a loud bark of laughter. "You...." he laughed again and shook his head. "Thanks..." he whispered, still chuckling, while looking down and touching Adam's thigh. Damn, he'd really like to run his hand all the way up that thigh and... Focus, Kris. 

Adam grinned and used his hand to tilt Kris' face back to his. "Okay, now that you're laughing and putty in my hands--"

"Somehow I doubt you want a guy soft like putty in your hands." 

"Good point." Adam touched Kris' shoulder. "Would you allow me to call a mechanic and have your car towed for you?"

"I can take care of it myself." 

"I know you can. And I can totally appreciate the stubborn jut to your jaw -- having one of those myself. But bottom line is this: At the risk of sounding like a prima donna, I don't have a ton of free time, but I do right _now._ So I'd like to take advantage of that and go on this date with you. If that means that I need to use a contact I have to get a mechanic out here and take care of this problem, then I'd rather do that than miss out on a chance for us to go on this date." Adam took a breath and waited. He had really liked Kris the other day and wanted to see if they were as compatible as they'd seemed over coffee, but being realistic, he also knew that if Kris had more pride than flexibility, it wasn't going to work and he'd rather know that now than later. 

Kris looked into Adam's eyes. He wasn't being conceited or patronizing, just honest. After all, Adam _was_ super busy. Kris remembered that he'd been shocked that Adam had found time in his schedule to go on this date within just a few days of meeting. Then again, he was still shocked the guy was available -- and seriously, why the hell didn't he have a boyfriend, anyway? He smiled. "Fair enough." 

"Are we good?" Adam asked, having seen the debate in Kris' brown eyes, the pride warring with practicality. 

"We're good. You make sense. There's stubborn and then there's stupid." Kris nodded. He had been so easy going before he'd come out here and learned that easy going guys got run over. But Adam wasn't trying to run him over, he was trying to be helpful. Huge difference and... Kris relaxed. "I'll grab my stuff if you want to make a phone call. And... thanks. I really appreciate it." 

"Seriously, not a problem." Adam smiled and searched through his contacts for the right number. "I actually like solving problems."

"Oh good!" Kris grinned. "Then you'll like this date idea I have." 

 

"So what's your idea?" Adam asked after Kris had handed the keys over to the mechanic and the man popped the hood of the truck.

"Geocaching." 

"What's that?" Adam asked curiously as he pointed toward his own car.

"You have a GPS, right?"

"If it's a gadget, I have it." Adam held up his remote car starter and pressed it. 

"Great. So..." Kris grinned as he got into the passenger seat and traced the silver embroidery on the leather seats in Adam's car. Oh yeah, this was definitely Adam Lambert's car. Black car, black leather seats, sparkling silver trim. "It would really suck if someone threw up on these."

"You know my friends, apparently," Adam said drily. "Or is that your way of telling me you get carsick?" 

"No, no." Kris rolled his eyes and said, "Just thinking of this time back home when one of _my_ friends vomited in my truck."

"Well, that explains your truck," Adam teased.

Kris groaned. "It's disgusting, I know. Priorities..."

"I guess so, given that your phone isn't cheap." Adam raised an eyebrow. It was curious, that crap car, Kris' threadbare clothes, and that expensive phone. He had learned that when you were playing, 'One of these things is not like the others' in real life... well, it could be fascinating or it could be a red flag. 

Flushing, Kris explained, "I don't have a computer, so I use the phone for internet and all that crap, so it's not such a bad use of money."

Damn, he was out of habit dating a normal guy who struggled with money, Adam thought, aggravated with himself for inadvertently embarrassing Kris about his phone. Adam touched Kris' knee and said placatingly. "Sorry. That makes total sense. If I had to make a choice between my phone and a car, I'd choose the phone too. Staying connected is way more important than the coolness of one's car. So, were you going to tell me where to point this car?" 

"Well, we have lots of choices." Kris held up his phone. "It all depends upon where you want to go. I was thinking we'd go somewhere remote because you'd get privacy then."

Adam nodded. That was a damn smart idea. "What is this geocaching thing?"

"Basically it's an international hobby of search and find. You go to a website and decide the general area you want to go and then look for hidden boxes called caches. They're ranked according to the difficulty of finding them."

"So you need the GPS because you get the coordinates?" Adam asked. 

"Right. You get the coordinates, but they're not exact. So when you get there -- wherever there is -- you have to search." 

"Wherever _there_ is..." Adam nodded. "I have that feeling many a morning on tour. Lane is my GPS. So did you pick out a general direction?"

"Yeah. I thought we'd go hiking, not hard hiking, an easy hike, but still -- that's why I told you to wear sturdy boots."

"Which I did." Adam pointed down. "And may I point out that they are totally uncool?"

Kris looked down. "They are actually. Where'd you get them and why do you have them?"

"You doubt that my closet contains a pair of sturdy boots?" Adam pretended mock outrage. 

"I told you to dress casually and your tee-shirt has rhinestones on it," Kris pointed out.

"It's a tee-shirt. Ipso facto, it's casual." 

"Casual rhinestones. Okay. From your closet. But the boots?" Kris pressed, curious about why Adam would have such a worn pair of hiking boots. "They look worn and used, which I don't think is your style." 

Sighing, Adam admitted, "My brother's." 

"Oh. You're close to your brother?" Kris asked, rubbing his thumb over the outside seam of his worn jeans. It had been so long since he'd talked to his own brother....

"Ehhhh..." Adam grimaced as he remembered Neil's negative comments about Adam's eagerness to date Kris even to the point of being willing to reschedule a meeting plus wear ugly boots. "He irritates me. Intensely. But he had broken-in hiking boots in my size. So I put up with him and his comments. For your sake." 

Looking back up, Kris smiled. "Well, then. I owe you."

"I'll keep that in mind." Adam smiled back. This geocaching sounded like it might actually be fun. He could see using it for a game for his fans for some promo opp. And... he had to stop thinking about work. That was one reason he'd wanted to go out with Kris -- he'd forgotten all about the zillion pressure points on him when they'd talked in the coffee shop. Somehow this guy managed to relax him and interest him all at the same time. "So the box. What's in the box, anyway? Or are we chasing after nothing and it's all about the process rather than the prize?"

Kris blinked at the rapid change of topic. "Oh, the boxes have things, like little prizes, you know? You can take one from the box as long as you put another little prize inside. For a souvenir. It can be anything. Some little trinket."

"So... it's like following a treasure map?" Adam asked eagerly. "We should have worn pirate hats."

"You're..." Kris trailed off. Seeing the laughter in Adam's eyes, he grinned. "You're kidding."

"If it makes you feel better to think I wouldn't wear a pirate hat while we follow a treasure map, go right ahead." 

Kris licked his lips in anticipation. Seeing the world through Adam Lambert's eyes was exciting. "You are going to be an adventure. I can feel it." 

"Oh, you won't see my swash my buckle and unleash my dagger yet! It's only our first date." 

"So what number date gets the buckle swashed?" 

"Depends upon how shivered are me timbers."

Kris laughed at Adam's silliness. "I haven't laughed this much in forever."

"I'm glad you're laughing," Adam said sincerely. Kris had looked tired and nervous when they'd first met up for the date in a parking lot, but with every burst of laughter and smile, he seemed to shed more and more of his burdens. It was nice to make someone happy so easily. Adam touched Kris' cheek, then pulled his hand back. He was sometimes too touchy, but there was something about Kris.... Be careful, Lambert, he told himself. Be careful this time. "Sorry." 

"Hey. It's cool." Kris reached out and squeezed Adam's' hand. Adam Fucking Lambert was sweet, too. "I'm a touchy guy myself." 

Looking down at Kris' smaller hand encasing his, Adam wondered at the warmth he felt coming from him. It was too soon or... A year ago, he would have been running pell mell into this possibility, this chemistry he felt between them, but now...

Sensing some hesitation on Adam's part, Kris said carefully, "I know it's not glamorous. No glitter." God, he hoped he hadn't screwed this up. 

"No glitter." Adam shrugged, then flicked at the front of his shirt. "I think I'm wearing enough for the day's purposes. Unless you're planning on ending the day with a drag show or something?"

"No. But I thought it was a good way for you to get out without people bothering you or...well, us. So we'd get a chance to get to know each other."

"That sounds like an awesome idea, actually." Adam nodded approvingly. Actually, it was kind of a genius idea. "Are the little boxes only in the woods?"

"Nope. They can be anywhere. There are some around the beaches. There are even some in urban areas."

"Really? There are hidden caches just around, whwere we walk and drive every day?" Adam's eyes widened as he looked into Kris' eager eyes. Little treasures really were everywhere. Maybe, even... Starbucks.

"Yeah. But who walks in LA?"

"Besides prostitutes?"

"And me." Kris sighed. "Trying to save my gas money."

"Hey, been there, done that. Try doing it in boots because you think you're too cool to wear sneakers."

"Clearly...." Kris gestured toward his feet. "That is not a problem I have." 

"Clearly, you are smarter than I was."

"Clearly, you're trying to put me at ease. I'm sorry. I'm really not a high maintenance sort of guy. Really."

"I didn't think so. I thought you were just nervous, trying to make a good impression and worried you weren't."

Kris' mouth dropped open. He leaned in and gave Adam a quick peck on his cheek. "You really are the nicest guy ever."

"Shhh.... You'll ruin my cool cred." Smiling down at the man beaming up at him, Adam sighed. Kris seemed like a nice guy too. Then again, he'd been screwed over by guys who seemed nice. Clearing his throat, he changed the topic. "So we should find something to put in the little cache? That means we need to go shopping!"

"It's nothing elaborate, Adam!" Kris laughed as he realized suddenly that they had spend half an hour sitting in a car and talking. Great date skills, Allen, he scolded himself. Who wants to sit in a parking lot? "Anything that fits, that's not going to degrade due to the weather. We can go to the Dollar Store. And it has to be G-rated."

"Well, damn." Adam snapped his fingers regretfully. "They really should have R and X-rated geocaching."

"I believe that's every night --"

"At a gay bar."

Kris broke into laughter and bumped his shoulder against Adam's. "Hey, that was my line! You stole it!"

Forgetting to keep his guard up, Adam leaned against Kris. "That's not the only thing I'd like to steal from you."

"I got nothing you'd want to steal--"

"No? How about your virtue?" Adam started the car and pointed it toward the nearest shopping center.

"You wouldn't have to steal that. I'd give it to you." Kris bit his lip. Where were these words coming from? When had he become such a flirt?

"Does that gift come wrapped up in a bow or with glitter?" Adam teased. He looked in the rear view mirror and caught sight of his own grin. The last half hour of just talking and teasing had been the best date he'd been on in a very long time. 

"It couldn't be plain?"

"It could. But glitter makes everything better." 

Kris grinned, then scraped his tongue with his teeth. "Really? I'd think the glitter could get caught and then you'd have to stop to floss." 

Adam's head snapped over to stare at Kris in surprise and began laughing, feeling more than amusement, more than that. Happiness. He had a feeling Kris was going to be an adventure too. One without coordinates. 

 

“Okay, let’s divide up the duties. You go into the Dollar Store and I’ll go over to the grocery store and get water and some other stuff.” Adam grabbed his hat and pushed his sunglasses up his face. He should have brought his Dusty Madrid wig. 

“I invited you.”  Kris looked up at Adam and wondered if he actually thought he was unrecognizable.

“I told you at Starbucks. I pay for my dates.” 

“You are seriously a control freak.” 

“If that’s a problem, let me know right now,” Adam said honestly. "I am bossy. I am actually working on it as part of my self-improvement plan and you can call me on it, but I am naturally bossy. It's my default." 

“I...” Kris licked his lips nervously. “How big of a control freak are you, seriously?”

Adam leaned against the car and stared at Kris, while thinking. Kris' soft brown eyes were wide and worried. He cursed at himself and gently rubbed his fingers across Kris' shoulder, hoping he was reassuring Kris that he wasn't the type to lock him up in a dungeon. According to his mom and dad and Dani and Lane and Allison and Alisan and Brad and maybe a few more of his friends, he'd become much more controlling ever since the unfortunate incident with the cell phone camera and a certain law suit. But as everyone kept telling him, he had to dial it back. 

"Wait, I'm wrong," Kris realized suddenly. "You let me plan this date, so you can't be too much of a control freak." 

Adam smiled. He'd been shocked, then flattered, that Kris had been insistent that since he'd asked Adam out, he would plan the date. He could not remember the last time when someone had done that for him. Plus the guy was cute with a great ass. And a southern accent. Damn, he did not want to screw this up. “Okay, here’s the deal. I _can_ be a control freak. But I'm definitely not looking for some guy who's submissive to my every petty little desire. That's unhealthy for everyone and frankly, a little scary because power corrupts. And..." Adam took a breath and hoped he wasn't making a mistake being this honest. "More important than my control is my interest in having the people around me be happy.”

"That was honest," Kris said softly while looking up into Adam's eyes. They were clear and... well, honest. No hesitancy right now, no caution, just truth. That was the look he should always have. Whoever had put that caution in those blue depths should be shot. 

"I'm honest. And that's a quality I demand in others." 

Kris nodded as he looked down at his feet and thought. Adam was bossy, no doubt, but it was clear that partly he was bossing Kris around right now because he thought Kris couldn’t afford to pay for the extras and wanted to save Kris’ pride. It wasn’t the my way or the highway bossiness of his parents and... he wasn’t going to think about that right now. Be happy. It was a beautiful day with a beautiful guy and.... Kris allowed himself the luxury of slowly scanning Adam from his feet up his long legs and... yeah, he could totally get into Adam being a control freak in bed. He kept looking up until he reached Adam’s amused eyes, licked his lips and agreed, “I can live with that. All of that.” 

"So live with the distribution of tasks as assigned and go spend a dollar." Giving Kris a gentle push in the direction of the Dollar Store, Adam smiled. He liked Kris a lot already and it had been a long long time since he'd felt so comfortable so fast with a date. Maybe because Kris treated him like a regular guy. 

"Aye, aye, captain!" Kris grinned and saluted.

"Do pirates salute?" Adam asked. "I should Google the protocol -- didn't the Pirates of the Caribbean movie talk about a pirate code..." 

"Don't get distracted. Go buy your own booty!" Kris laughed as he began to walk away, while looking over his shoulder at Adam. He could look at the man forever. God, he was gorgeous. He still couldn't quite believe he had this opportunity.

"How much is yours?" Adam leered at Kris' ass. 

Slamming to a halt, Kris turned around and pointed at Adam. "More than a buck! How much is yours?"

"I dunno. Ask Lloyds of London." Adam smirked. 

"Your ass is not insured!" Kris yelped. "No way." 

"Don't doubt the insurability of my ass. You haven't seen it naked yet." Adam turned toward the grocery store and sauntered away. He looked over his shoulder and grinned when he caught Kris staring. "Time's a'wastin', me hearty! Fifteen minutes!"

"Oh crapsticks!" Kris started, then blushed. Adam's ass was damn distracting. 

 

"How's it going?" Kris smiled as he spoke into his phone. "Great. I really like him. A lot. He's... sweet and funny with a touch of paranoid, but really he's... just awesome. To be honest, I can't believe this." 

"Hi, Lane." Adam sighed as he called her back for his latest check-in. "Calling to check on Mr. Thirty-eight Cents? .... Yeah, I like him. How much? I... I'm not afraid!... He's a little prickly at times, but then again, so am I. He probably has baggage too, just like me, just like anyone who has been through the dating wringer.... No, Mary Poppins, I won't have a bad attitude. Yes, ma'am. But wait-- the background check?... Okay, so initially it looks good. Great." Adam looked up at he passed a frozen food aisle and saw the smile on his face. Good god, he looked happy. "But... you talked with the label about resources for a full check? Even better.... Yes, I'll have a good time. Even without a pirate hat. Although maybe the Dollar Store has --- No. I wouldn't buy condoms at the Dollar Store! I was talking about..." 

 

“I got....” Kris smiled hopefully as they met next to Adam's car. “Pirate treasure!”

“Let me see--” Adam opened the bag. “Yes! You scored! Plastic pirate doubloons. Perfect. I can't believe they had these."

"I know, right?" Kris bopped up and down on his feet excitedly. 

Laughing at Kris' excitement, Adam continued, "I mean, seriously. Geocaching is about looking for hidden treasure. So these are perfect. Did they have feathers?"

 “Feathers?" Kris wrinkled his nose in confusion. "I didn't look. But the doubloons... Wait. I mean, it’s probably been done a million times before.”

“Not by us...” Adam said thoughtfully, looking back at the shopping center. 

“Which means...?”

 “I bet they sell glue and glitter in the Dollar Store!” Adam said eagerly. 

“Oh boy...” 

"And maybe feathers. We need feathers. And glue. Plus glitter."

Kris gulped. "Feathers? And _glue_?" 

"And glitter, of course."

"Ooooh, boy. What are we going to do with that stuff? Like the glue? The glue worries me..." 

" _Stick_ with me...." Adam waited until Kris groaned at the bad joke, then pulled Kris along with him back toward the store. "And you'll have more fun than you expected."

"Why? Are you going to show me your naked ass too?" Kris grinned. "Is that why we need the glue and glitter and feathers?"

"Maybe the feathers are for when you show me your naked ass." Adam winked as they pushed open the door.


	3. Bananas and Boxes

**Chapter 3: Bananas and Boxes Rating PG-13**

 

I can't believe they didn't have feathers." Adam sighed as he negotiated the curves of the road.

“How did I end up being the one to glue on glitter?” Kris complained as he struggled to balance the tiny drying plastic doubloon on his leg.

 “You didn’t realize it, but this trip is a test,” Adam intoned in a deep voice. 

“What?” Kris frowned, then swore as his jerky movement spilled glitter on his jeans. “Damn it!”

“Looking good...” Adam looked down from the road to Kris' legs. His worn jeans were too loose -- either he had no idea how to buy a pair of jeans or he had lost weight. Given how thin Kris was, Adam would bet on the latter. Those protein bars he'd bought in the grocery store were going home accidentally on purpose with Kris. 

“For what?” Kris grumbled with a smile. “This looks awesome on you. Ridiculous on me.” 

“All you have to do to pull something off is want to pull it off.” Adam checked his GPS and made a last turn into a trail head. 

 “Does that apply to your clothes?” Kris asked with a smirk. He lost the smirk as he wondered where these words were coming from. He never flirted like this, all...dirty and sexual. Then again, he'd never been on a date with Adam Fucking Lambert. You'd have to be dead below the waist and possibly blind to not think about sex when you were on a date with him. Kris was neither blind and.... just checking, nope, not dead below the waist. 

“Not right now!” Adam pretended shock. “Have you forgotten? This is an audition for the position of my Glitter Application Assistant.” 

“Hmm...” Kris lightly blew on the glitter to see if it had set and frowned when most of it danced away. Seeing Adam’s grin -- damn it, he had probably known that the glitter wouldn't really stick to the plastic -- Kris grinned back. “Is that a full-time position? With benefits?”

“Sadly, no. Life does not require full-time glitter. Even my life."

"My god, life is _tragic_."

"Indeed. However..." Adam raised an eyebrow at Kris. "If the applicant were willing to add other duties as assigned, benefits might be negotiable.” 

Kris opened his mouth to retort, then shook his head. “You, sir, are a tremendous flirt.”

“You’re not doing too bad yourself, Mr. Allen.” 

 “I don’t flirt.”

“Then an alien from a pod -- no doubt hidden somewhere in these godforsaken woods -- has occupied your body because, boy, you are flirting.” 

"It's not an alien I'd like to occupy my body...." Kris stopped in shock as the words popped out of his mouth. Glancing over as Adam brought the car to a halt, he hid his smile and asked suspiciously, "Did you drug me?"

"No, it's just the effect of my innate..." Adam paused as they got of the car and stretched, "Something..." Adam stared when Kris' shirt rode up on his midriff. 

"It's probably the residual effect of all that glitter." Kris grinned, then blushed when he caught Adam's gaze on his body. 

"Yeah." Adam licked his lips and reached back inside for the bag. Kris was gorgeous, but far too thin. "Here--" He said as he threw a box of protein bars toward Kris. "Put those in your knapsack in case we get hungry. I've got water too."

Kris nodded as he caught the box and shoved it in his knapsack. "What else do you have in there? Is it like Mary Poppins' suitcase?"

"Mary Poppins?" Adam whistled. "That's weird. I was just talking with Lane about Mary Poppins."

"That is weird." Kris shrugged. "Great minds, right? I knew I liked her in Starbucks." 

"But I do have something else... Oh wait, I almost forgot." Adam hid his grin as he dug in the bottom of the second Dollar Store store bag. "Here."

"What..." Kris looked down in confusion, then began to giggle. He held up the small white box. "Floss? You bought me floss?"

"We bought glitter. I thought the floss was a necessary addition." 

"I am not that easy, sir." Kris grinned. "I brought bug spray." He smiled as Adam tossed the floss into the car, then rolled his eyes at himself as he wielded the can on himself. Great idea, Allen. A real romantic date never involved bug spray. 

"Hey, at least in the woods, I don't need to worry about getting sunburned," Adam said seeing Kris' chagrin, as he transferred water bottles to the small knapsack and surreptitiously shoved another box of protein bars into it. Oh god, he was turning into his grandmother, trying to feed people.

"You sure _are_ a positive person, aren't you?" Kris asked, reaching for the knapsack and tugging on it when Adam held on.

"I'm the positive and my brother is the negative. Together we're a whole ion or some such science stuff." 

Kris nodded. "Well, since you're a regular Bill Nye the Science Guy, I bet you can see that I'm capable of carrying my own knapsack, so let go and let's go." 

 

 

"Ugh. Maybe we should go," Kris suggested after they'd spent half an hour turning in circles in a twenty foot radius from the coordinates. They'd had an easy hike in and well, truth be told, it had been no hardship following Adam's ass as he led the way with his GPS. Truth be told, given how hard he'd been following Adam's ass, it was a miracle he knew his own name at this point, so it was no wonder he couldn't find some stupid little box. Why had he thought this was a good idea? "If you're not having fun, I'm sorry--" 

"Are you kidding?" Adam laughed. He had felt Kris' appreciative gaze on him the entire way and enjoyed their easy flirting and chatting about music more than he'd enjoyed a date in ... a really long time. As in... maybe... years. So long it was like he'd never had a trick photograph him naked and sell his pictures to a sleazy website or had a boyfriend who'd only been using him for publicity to benefit his own nascent music career. Yeah, before _that_. Back when he believed in...truths like he could swear he saw in Kris' eyes. He touched his stomach and said honestly, "I like puzzles and I'm having a _great_ time with you. You're easy to be with."

"Okay. Awesome." Kris relaxed, then looked around the clearing again. "Hey, maybe we're looking at this from the wrong angle." 

"Oh, good idea!" Adam exclaimed. Maybe he'd been looking at all of this from the wrong angle. Maybe... Oh focus on the damn box, Lambert. Leave the heavy lifting for three in the morning. "Let's think about it. I'm taller than the average guy and you're about the height of an average woman..." He waited.

"If you're waiting for me to get agitated about a short joke, forget about it." Kris grinned smugly as Adam's face fell. God, the guy's face was so expressive -- he really should stop worrying about how Adam would take comments and ideas and just pay attention to his face. "I've long since accepted my... petite height." 

"So short jokes won't work?" Adam slumped his shoulders, then looked up through his lashes.

Kris tapped his chin. "How do you do that -- look up at me even though you tower over me?"

"It's a skill set born of trying to con my mother." Adam grinned. "Okay, so let's think about the box."

Kris nodded. Adam was damn focused. And bossy. "You're right about the height -- we've been looking down. And around. So maybe we need to look up from a lower angle?"

"Great idea." Adam took a step back to reorient himself, then grabbed Kris' arm to pull him down.

"Oh!" Kris gasped at the suddenness with which Adam tugged on him and reached out a hand to hang onto Adam's arm, then without thinking leaned against the taller man. 

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to grab you so precipitously," Adam apologized, even though he was enjoying Kris leaning up against him. Kris just seemed to... fit, Adam thought.

"You just meant to grab me. Newsflash - You can grab me any way you want, including with three dollar words, any time you want," Kris said, then blushed and looked down, seeing the matted green and weedy groundcover under their feet. What the hell were these words coming out of his mouth?

"Like...now?" Adam smiled and pulled Kris tight up against him.

"Oh!" Kris gasped again and feeling the strength and heat against his entire body, felt an itch inside him that he could only scratch by... "Oh yeah..." he groaned as he instinctively rubbed himself against Adam's bigger body. Damn, he loved the way Adam pulled him around.

"One minute you're shy and the next minute, you're..." Adam shifted his thigh until it parted Kris' legs and oh hell _yeah,_ Kris rubbed against him. "Like that." 

"You like it like that?" Kris asked, his voice getting deeper with each word as Adam's face slowly drew closer to his.

"Like this..." Adam whispered, his lips brushing against Kris' mouth, happily surprised when Kris eagerly pressed forward to meet him. Sliding one hand up Kris' back to cup his head, Adam held still for a moment, looking into Kris' excited eyes, before bending his head to meld their mouths together. Testing, then tasting, then thinking, 'Oh yes, _this_ , this is what I've been wanting and waiting for and did I find it? Did I?' 

And then, finally, he forgot to think when Kris' mouth, warm and welcoming, made him forget everything he thought he knew and concentrated on what he wanted to learn. How sweet was the mouth opening for his, how hungry the gasps and moans, how tight were the arms holding him. How much he wanted this man in his arms. 

Sliding his other hand down Kris' back until he could cup his butt, he squeezed, then pulled up, groaning when Kris stood on tip toe to thrust against his leg, the hard ridge in his jeans pushing against Adam's thigh. Pulling Kris up tighter, Adam gasped when Kris tilted his head back and pulled Adam's mouth against his neck and he felt the whimpers Kris was making vibrating against his lip. Nipping his way back up Kris' neck, Adam slanted his mouth over Kris', feeling his cock leap when Kris immediately parted his lips and urged him inside with seductive sweeps of his tongue. As Kris' arms tightened around his neck, Adam began to lower them to the ground and only the thud of his foot against the backpack reminded him that.

"Oh fuck..." Adam gasped and pulled back to stare incredulously at Kris.

"Don't stop..." Kris groaned, his eyes unfocused as he launched himself at Adam and resumed kissing him. 

Adam pulled his lips away from the clinging pressure of Kris' mouth. The silence of the forest was broken only by the harsh sound of their labored breathing. He stared at Kris in shock. That kiss had been shocking. Shockingly sweet and hot at the same time. 

"Holy hell..." Kris whispered, reaching up to touch Adam's swollen lower lip. That mouth had given him more pleasure than he'd thought a mouth could give. Just from a kiss. "That was..." 

Adam let out a long breath. If he had kept kissing Kris and feeling the way his body rubbed against his in all the right places, he would have thrown him down to the matted grasses under their feet and with his luck, then and only then would a paparazzo pop up like an unwelcome erection in junior high swim class. So, refocus, Lambert. Lightly nipping at Kris' fingertip, he grinned when Kris yelped and pulled his finger back. "Well, this is a first."

"Huh?" Kris touched his tongue to his own lower lip, realizing his mouth was no doubt looking as well-kissed as Adam's.

"I have actually never made out with a guy in the woods before."

"Actually..." Kris smiled. "Neither have I. I've also never made out with a guy when I'm wearing bug spray."

Adam laughed at Kris' prosaic comment. Kris was just so... normal. Which was so abnormal in his life that it was like a ray of sunshine and.. god, he was getting goopy. Stay rational, Lambert. "Well, then, this is a day for quite a few firsts. Speaking of which, maybe we should focus on finding our first cache." 

"God, you're focused," Kris groaned as he reluctantly stepped out of Adam's arms. 

"Let's be methodical. Focus on one piece of the visual picture at a time."

Kris nodded. "Yeah. And... Maybe superimpose like a grid over what we're looking at. You know, in our minds. Work on one grid at a time."

"That's a great idea!" Adam agreed and they both knelt down and looked up from a new angle. 

"I'll take the left and you take the right," Kris suggested.

"What _if_ it's not here?" Adam asked, thinking aloud. "Wouldn't that be a kick in the pants?"

"Have some faith," Kris urged. Then rubbing damp hands on his knees, he added hopefully, "And even if we don't find the box, we've had a good time looking, right?"

"Yes and--" Adam smiled at Kris, looked back up at the tree, then paused. " _Wait_. Look at the twist of vines. Doesn't that look unnatural, the shape?"

"Where?" Kris narrowed his eyes and looked in the direction in which Adam was pointing. He tilted his head and grinned. "There!"

"By George, I think we've got it!" Adam said in a British accent. They both stood up and started toward the vine twist, Kris reaching up to pull it free. 

Kris held it up triumphantly and shook it. "Ha! You did not defeat us, evil box! Ha ha ha _ha_!"

"Camouflage duct tape?" Adam glared at the little box, than began laughing. "Hiding in plain sight. This is evil!"

"They make tie-dye duct tape too."

"No way." 

"Way. I saw it at Walmart once." 

"There must be a creative use for that..." 

"I can see it now." Kris held the box up to his mouth as if it were a microphone. "Tell me, Mr. Lambert. What was the inspiration for your latest touring costume?"

"Duct tape!"

"Duct tape? How shocking!"

"How is duct tape shocking?" 

"Please, Mr. Lambert, we all know you are into alternative sexuality involving leashes and chains and duct tape is part of that lifestyle."

"Really?" Adam pursed his lips. "I am shocked by the information. Utterly shocked." 

"You're not shocked by anything, Mr. Lambert." Dropping the pretentious voice, Kris elbowed Adam. "People wouldn't really use duct tape, would they? I mean, that duct tape would pull hair out like a mofo, doncha think?"

"Ouch. I've had my chest waxed a few times. But I suppose one could completely shave one's body." 

"Just to use duct tape?"

"People have weird fetishes." Adam shuddered. "And I hear all about them on Twitter. Talk about shocking."

"You still read your Twitter feed? You have more than a million followers! And your fans tweet you all the time!"

"Someone's got to." 

"Really?"

"Probably not." Adam shrugged. "I'm a little OCD when it comes to work." 

Kris nodded. Adam's focus on work was something he'd heard about. "You should have a person who reads it and shows you the trends and doesn't show you the freaky deaky stuff or the haters." 

"That's what my mom says." Adam shook his head. "She burns some of my mail. She says it is the only way to fully cleanse her mind and her condo of it." 

"So what is the freakiest fetish you ever read about?" Kris held up his hand. "Wait. Don't tell me one that's gonna give me nightmares."

"About me?" Adam thought. "Okay, there was this one girl and -- oh yeah, she tweeted a picture -- who made a fake Adam out of fruit. She was quite fond of the color purple. And kiwis, for some reason. Kiwis, I mean, seriously."

"She made an Adam Lambert? Out of fruit?" Kris bit his lip. How did people come up with these ideas? 

"It's okay to laugh," Adam urged, smiling himself at the amusement in Kris' eyes that was infectious. 

"Thank god!" Kris burst out laughing. 

"I thought you were going to give yourself a hernia holding it in."

"But fruit? That's wrong."

"No shit. I mean, was it an insult or not?" 

"No, I mean, seriously -- I can totally see you in _vegetables._ "

Adam grinned. He liked Kris' sense of humor. "Vegetables last longer. Maybe she had doubts about my stamina. However, I was hoping for meat." 

"I don't know. Tofu might have its.... uses. Visually." 

Adam looked at Kris and they both shook their heads and said, "Ew." 

"So dare I ask? For your...the banana was--"

"Yeah. No imagination. At all. And it was a skinny banana."

"Defamation!"

"Indeed. As were the plums for my balls." 

"That's kind of... deflating. I'd be hoping for canteloupe myself." 

Adam laughed. "Don't you mean musk melon?"

Kris looked over his shoulder and shook his head, sure he was grinning from ear to ear like some Cheshire Cat, but he couldn't help it. "I can't believe we're having a dirty conversation about fruit." 

"If you read my twitter feed, you'll learn _tout de suite_ that anything can be dirty."

"You'll have to show me sometime," Kris offered, hoping...

"I will." Adam nodded. He'd like to go out with Kris again. "It involves heavy alcohol consumption, however."

"Given that I'm a bartender, I can even mix the drinks. But tell me -- if you drink, do I have to take away your tweeting privileges or will you have a Twitter party that Perez will end up reporting on?"

Adam thought. "You'll have to take my tweeting privileges. Sometimes -- just on occasion -- I act somewhat impulsively when it comes to expressing my thoughts."

"No!" Kris grinned. Adam Lambert's candid interviews had always cracked him up. He'd snorted milk from his cereal up his nose more than once while reading them. Which was probably something he'd avoid telling the man in question or risk losing whatever cool cred he might have, which was probably none after the disaster with his truck. "So, given how freely you express your thoughts, would you...tell me? " Kris swallowed hard and plowed ahead. "Would you like to go geocaching with me again?"

Adam halted in surprise. Kris had asked him out again. No one asked him out. And Kris with his alternating assertiveness and shyness confused him. 

"Adam?" Kris turned and worried his teeth over his bottom lip. He looked away from Adam's blue eyes and down at his feet, shuffling them back and forth before forcing himself to ask, "Crapsticks. Did I...uh... just make a fool outta myself?"

"Oh god, no, you didn't. I'm sorry." Adam took a step forward and reached for Kris' hand. "I was just surprised. But my answer is yes. I'll go geocaching with you or even, to dinner and a movie. I'll plan the next date." 

"Awesome!" Kris nodded eagerly. Adam obviously would be just as happy to take over planning as Kris would be to give it up.

"Hey, what's in the box, anyway? We need to put our doubloon in there, don't we?"

"Oh yeah." Kris nodded. He'd like it if Adam put his doubloon in him. He sighed and pried open the lid. Their heads nearly banged together as they bent forward to look. "A... bar theme?"

Adam laughed as he poked at a tiny umbrella and a motley assortment of swizzle sticks. "Did someone go geocaching in the woods after a party?"

"That would be kinda stupid." Kris watched Adam's polished fingernail poke at the sticks and then laughed. "Hey, look -- "

"Ha! A little sword like you'd use to spear an olive." Adam pulled the little green sword out and held it up. "A pirate sword!"

Kris gave a loud gasp. "They knew _our_ theme!"

"It's destiny," Adam said solemnly, then his lips curved into a smile mocking himself. 

"I think it is..." Kris said softly. Shaking his head to clear it, he asked, "Where's our doubloon?"

"You were the one in charge of the doubloons. And the glitter. You are failing your audition."

"Hmm.." Kris snatched the sword. Fearful of losing it, he tucked it into his shirt pocket, snapping the flap closed, before leaning into Adam. "Is there any way I can improve my rating? Like say..." He reached up to press a kiss against the divot at the base of Adam's neck. "With a kiss?"

"Winning the position might require quite a few of those..." Adam said with a smile, then let out a soft moan as Kris abruptly captured his lips with a kiss that warmed not only his lips, but began to thaw out the chill that had seem so omnipresent for the last year. Here in the cool shade of the woods, he felt quite warm.

"So..." Kris whispered moments later when he pulled back. "Did that help with my rating?"

"What rating?" Adam asked, running his thumb along Kris' cheek, more interested in the warmth in Kris' eyes than in their conversation. He could see affection in the soft brown depths. Affection, an honest liking. Kris seemed to really just... like him. And it wasn't because Adam had taken him someplace cool or expensive or filled with celebrities or stalked by paparazzi. In fact, this date had been the opposite, just the two of them in worn boots and bug spray and... just the two of them. He'd had the best time. With a guy who wore a plaid shirt with snap chest pockets. Life was weird and wonderful. Yes, he was going to say it -- He'd had an unexpectedly wonderful time today.

Unable to keep from smiling at the happiness in Adam's eyes, Kris sighed and wrapped his arms around Adam to hug him. When Adam hugged him back, Kris smiled. Adam was apparently just as physically affectionate as he was. They might be... maybe they were a good match. 

"I hate to say, but we should probably head back," Adam said reluctantly. 

"Yeah. Let me get that doubloon...." Kris patted his shirt pocket to make sure the sword was still there as he bent over to open the knapsack and pull out the plastic disk.

"Really. Not enough glitter." Adam grinned as Kris rolled his eyes and carefully slid the fake coin into the box before replacing it within the twist of vine.

"I'll note that when I enter the data in to the site that states that we found it."

"You don't have to say my name, do you?" Adam asked abruptly.

"Of course not!" Kris reassured him. He nodded as he realized that a whole slew of fans would no doubt invade the woods for the silly doubloon. 

"Good." Adam sighed with relief. "I like to keep my private life private."

"Got it. And for the record -- I'd feel the same way. I'm really private about that stuff too. I don't like gossip at all." 

Adam picked up Kris' backpack. "I appreciate it. But we should go. Unfortunately, I have an interview to do this evening with a reporter in Hong Kong. I met her the first time I went out after Idol and she's always been a huge supporter, so I don't want to miss her and these woods no doubt have crappy reception."

Kris nodded agreeably, slung his backpack on his back and started out of the clearing. "So, which Asian country did you like best?" he asked as they began the trek out, talking about traveling. 

"Turn around before you trip over an exposed root or something disgusting," Adam pointed ahead about half an hour later as Kris kept turning around to talk to him. 

"Did you have a good time? Really?" Kris asked, still looking over his shoulder and trying not to grin. He'd give it about five minutes, then Adam would get all bossy again about facing forward. He had to wonder how bossy Adam would be in bed and -- "Ack!" Kris spluttered as he tripped over a root and avoided looking back at what he knew had to be a self-satisfied smirk on Adam's face. 

Smirking because -- Ha! -- he'd been right about paying attention as you walked, Adam answered the question. "There were no paps, we glued glitter on to plastic pirate doubloons, I found out about tie-dye duct tape and we talked about fetishes. How could I not have a good time?" Plus Kris was a fantastic kisser. Adam grinned as he looked from Kris' face and down again at the sight that he'd been following. "And then there's the fact that I've been following your very fine ass for quite a while."

"Whaaaat?" Kris turned in surprise to gape at Adam.

Adam gave up contemplating Kris' ass to grab him before he plowed into him. Which wasn't the worse sacrifice given the way Kris seemed to automatically gravitate into his arms. This date had been fantastic, he thought, looking down into Kris' smiling face. This date had been more than that though, it had been a good idea. A good way to see how the other person solved problems. "I did have a good time. It was a challenge. An unusual one for me. Got me out of my usual headgames."

"I enjoyed it too. But it was more frustrating than I thought it was gonna be. The buggers who hid that box were evil. I gave up before you did," Kris observed, rubbing his nose against Adam's shoulder, while sneaking in a deep breath. Seriously, _how_ did he smell so good? His father would say it was the work of the devil and... Forget about that. You're in Adam Fucking Lambert's arms, idiot. He smiled up at Adam, remembering Adam's insistence on finding that box, before beginning to walk again. "You're really stubborn."

"Bull-headed," Adam agreed, once again following Kris. "You'd think I was a Taurus."

"Oh, that's right, you're into astrology." Kris suddenly stopped. Oh shit--

"Yes?" Adam asked, seeing Kris' whitened face. He looked around. "Did you hear a bear or something?"

"There are bears in California?" Kris gasped in shock. 

"Uh, yeah." 

"No way." Kris took a step back and banged into Adam's front. Hearing another sound in the woods, he turned and realized that Adam had wrapped his arms around him. Kris sighed, forgetting all about any bears as he snuggled closer to Adam. There were no bears. Nope, no bears. Just... a tall, really warm man who smelled really good even after hiking through the woods. Wearing a rhinestone-covered shirt. Kris grinned and gently touched the sparkly spots on Adam's shirt. "I think maybe your glitter shirt scared off the bears." 

"That's why I wear shiny stuff. Repels bears. Attracts twinks."

"I'm not pretty enough to be a twink," Kris argued, as he rubbed his cheek against the soft cotton of Adam's shirt, feeling the hard curve of shoulder under it.

Unthinkingly, Adam kissed the top of Kris head and told him, "You're pretty enough for me." 

"I think that's my line. Ooooh..." Kris groaned as he felt Adam's cock harden against his stomach. 

"For the record, I think you're gorgeous and if you keep pressing yourself up against me like that, you're going to find out about the actual size of my banana." 

"For the record? I think I'm gonna like your banana." Kris grinned while Adam burst out laughing.

 

"Kris!" The other bartender called out. "Delivery!"

"Why can't you sign for it?" Kris griped. "I'm knee deep in the Scotch shipment."

"It's for you, dumbass." John rolled his eyes. Kris was a nice guy, good co-worker, easy-going, fun to watch a game with... but he was often sad or uptight --no doubt worrying about money or feeling lonely, he'd bet. That is, until a few days ago when Kris had come in to work carrying a cup of Starbucks in a death grip with the biggest smile he'd ever seen him wearing on his face. Aside from when the Razorbacks had won an important game, anyway. "Get out here. I think you have an admirer or a charity taking an interest in your colonic health."

Kris rolled his eyes. Only in LA would a bartender in a fairly seedy bar be versed in colonic health. Then he blanched. "Colonic health? Uh..." Kris darted around the corner and stopped dead as he caught sight of the towering pile of color on the end of the bar.

"WhadIsay?" John asked, grinning at Kris' surprise.

"It can't be for me." Kris gaped in shock. What the _hell_ was that? 

"Yes, sir, it is." The delivery man held out a pad for Kris to sign. "If there is any problem with the fruit, call the number on the card attached and we'll be happy to replace it. Enjoy." He smiled and left, shaking his head. Celebrities and their quirks never ceased to amaze him. 

"I don't even..." Kris murmured. "It's almost as tall as I am. And..." He blinked. The placement of the fruit was... almost obscene. That banana.... He began to laugh and grabbed for the card. Yup, Adam. _Hope you like my banana as much as you said you would. AML_

"Why would anyone send you a fruit basket?" John stopped talking to look at Kris in shock at the laughter and the happiness that filled his face. When was the last time he'd seen Kris this happy? Never? He shrugged, then tilted his head and whistled. "And where the hell did whoever it was get that fruit? The planet called Steroid? Those canteloupes are the biggest melons I've ever seen. And that banana -- you could choke on it! How're you supposed to get your mouth around it?"

"Ohgodohgodohgod....." Kris bent forward grabbing onto the bar for support. He laughed hysterically, wondering if it were actually possible to fall in love over a fruit basket. Or camouflage duct tape. Or a cup of coffee and thirty-eight cents. And a circle of glitter surrounding them.


	4. Rim Shot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is PG-13.

"Here comes my boss."

"You have a boss?" Kris asked, pausing in his nervous handling of the multitude of silverware still before him. He didn't think anyone _really_ bossed Adam Fucking Lambert around. Or at least not successfully, which explained--

"By the way? Smile nice for the camera." Adam glared at a woman who'd been watching them too closely. 

"What camera?" Kris asked, his head swiveling around toward the restaurant windows, but he didn't see any photographers outside. This was the first time he'd visited a 'scene' LA restaurant and he had been nervous the whole night about photographers or gossip bloggers or other pond scum spoiling their meal. "You mean... inside the restaurant? No way. And how would anyone know we're here?"

"Oh, honey, there's always a camera and there's always someone willing to sell you out."

"That's horrible!"

"To quote Sheryl Crow, 'Welcome to LA.'" Adam smiled and stood up as a tall, but much older man in an expensive suit drew next to their table. "Geoffrey. It's a surprise to see you here."

"I read on Twitter that you were here on a date and thought I'd stop by to sneak a peek." Geoffrey Brush smiled.

Adam laughed. You had to have advance reservations for this restaurant, so he knew Geoffrey was joking. "You have time to read Twitter?"

"When it comes to my favorite client, of course, I do."

"He's teasing, He has some minions who skulk in the darkness informing on his clients," Adam said to Kris. "Kris Allen, meet my manager, Geoffrey Brush of the long reach. Excuse his snooty British accent and falsely obsequious manner."

"Sir." Kris stood and extended his hand. Clearing his throat nervously, he said, "We've met before. You rejected me. Or rather, your minions who skulk in the darkness did." 

"I remember meeting you. You seemed like a nice young man." Geoffrey patted Kris on the shoulder. "I hope you know better than to take it personally."

"I'm learning."

Geoffrey nodded in Adam's direction. "Adam will tell you that a thick skin might be even more important than talent in this business."

"Seems like autotuning is more important than talent in this business," Kris said drily.

Adam laughed loudly and patted Kris on the back. "Good one."

Geoffrey smiled at Adam's amusement and nodded at Kris. "Ah, I really do remember you now. You had a certain backbone that is unusual and is a sign that you're not desperate enough. Yet." Geoffrey shrugged. "Everyone has their price."

"No shit," Adam said softly. That was a hard lesson to learn and keep relearning.

Frowning, Geoffrey patted Adam's arm and leaned in close to whisper, "Buck up, as you Americans say. I have a good feeling about this guy." 

"Based on what?" Adam asked cautiously, as he gestured for Kris to sit back down. Knowing Lane had used the resources of Brush's agency, he asked, "Did the full background check come in?"

"A partial crossed my desk less than an hour ago. All good. But, body language and instincts are far more important than a background check. I've been watching you two. He's had his eyes on _you_ the entire time. He hasn't been looking around the restaurant or outside to see what other celebrity or industry executive he can spot or schmooze. He seemed nervous, but he was totally focused on you," Geoffrey said sincerely. "A real fame whore or user would be incapable of doing that. Correct?"

"I suppose," Adam said noncommittally. He'd be the one making decisions about his dates, not anyone else. He would not ask, he would not ask, about that partial background check. If it came back all good, then he didn't need to know more. Right now, anyway. "We're being rude to our dates."

"Give him a chance, Adam," Geoffrey suggested. "I hate to see you so closed off."

"I know. You've said that multiple times before." Adam glared at Geoffrey. He did not need his manager to lecture him about his love life. And okaaaay, Geoffrey was also a friend, but he was tired of everyone lecturing him about getting back into the game. 

"And I meant it. You're not someone meant to be alone. And your music reflects that." Geoffrey pulled back and smiled apologetically at Kris. "Please excuse my rudeness. Private business."

"Of course. I understand," Kris said softly. "Business comes first."

"Not now. And not always," Geoffrey said firmly. "Mr. Allen, a pleasure to see you again. And Adam... think about what I said."

"Thank you for your concern," Adam said coolly.

Geoffrey looked at Kris and smiled. "That's his polite way of telling me to sod off."

Adam smiled. "I'm nothing if not polite." 

"You're a whole lot more than polite." Geoffrey chuckled. "You're obstinate..."

"Persistent," Adam corrected. 

"Have a tendency to over-analyze..."

"An enviable ability to focus." Adam smiled smugly.

"An inability to allow someone else to win an argument."

"Are we _arguing_?" Adam asked in an incredulous tone, his eyes widened.

Geoffrey burst out laughing. "You _are_ my favorite client. And more importantly, one of my favorite _people_ in this town." He shook his head, then as the server approached with their desserts, turned to Kris. "Again, my apologies for interrupting. I hope you've enjoyed your meal."

"I have, thank you," Kris smiled automatically as Brush walked away, having enjoyed the byplay between Adam and Geoffrey almost as much the delicious meal. Obviously they were more than business associates, they seemed to be friends, he mused as their dessert plates were laid before them and they began eating. 

"How is your dessert?" Adam prodded as Kris gazed in Geoffrey's direction, his brow furrowed in thought for a long silent moment. Probably thinking of that rejection from the label. Well, he knew what it felt like. And he remembered having a few hungry moments himself. "If you don't like it, order something else. Please don't hesitate." God, Kris was so thin, he needed to eat. Maybe, Adam thought, he should give him a Trader Joe gift card -- when was Kris' birthday? 

"Great!" Kris dug back into some elaborate dessert. "I love cake and this one is great."

"Tell me about it," Adam ordered. "Let me live vicariously."

"Take a bite!" Kris ordered, holding up his cake-laden fork.

"No, my--"

"If you say your diet is so strict you can't have one _bite_ of cake, I'm gonna..."

"Gonna what?" Adam asked curiously, while hiding his amusement at Kris' annoyed fidgeting and spluttering. Then as he ran his free hand through his hair, Kris reminded Adam of his friend's hedgehog. He let his grin show. 

Kris spluttered. "You... You take the cake, take the damn cake!" 

"Okay, okay." Adam laughed and bent forward. "Since you're asking so nicely." He parted his lips and held still while Kris bit his lip and carefully raised the fork. Adam grabbed Kris' hand and shoved the fork into his mouth. "Mmm. Good. What do you think?"

Watching Adam savor the bite, then lick his lip to get every crumb, Kris held up a cake-filled fork for Adam again and smiled. He could get into feeding this guy. "I think it's basically a fancy chocolate cake with a three-dollar name that sounds like the title of a romance novel. Ebony Ecstasy Somethingorother."

"Sounds more like a black dildo to me," Adam quipped.

Kris burst into laughter, then clapped his hand over his mouth. When he thought he had himself under control, he took a sip of water and said, "Thanks for bringing me here. I haven't eaten a meal like this in..." He stopped and then laughed. "Forever. Seriously. Best meal ever." 

"I'm glad." Adam smiled back, enjoying being on a date with a guy who wasn't too cool for school. "You were nervous coming here, though, weren't you? Had you heard of the restaurant before?"

"No, when I asked you where we were going, the other bartender said it was a very trendy restaurant where important people went. So I Googled it." 

"Why?"

"I... uh..." Kris stammered, then shoved another bite of the cake in his mouth. 

"Well?" Adam drummed his fingers on the table impatiently. What was Kris hiding? 

"I wanted to call and ask about the dress code for the restaurant." 

"I don't understand. Why didn't you just ask me?"

"Because I didn't want to seem like an ignorant rube," Kris blurted out. 

"Oh. Don't think that. How _would_ you know about this restaurant?" Adam poked at the pineapple in his bowl. The chef could rename it Paranoid Pineapple in his honor. "I hope I haven't given you the impression that I'm impatient with reasonable questions."

Kris poked Adam's hand with his own fork, grinning at Adam's look of surprise. "No and besides it was a question about clothes. Now that I think about it, you'd probably be thrilled to talk about what to wear." 

"I'm _always_ willing to talk about clothes."

"Are you going to be the red carpet correspondent for ET for the AMAs again this year?" Kris smiled. "I bet you do that just to make their collective heads explode." 

"I'm no troublemaker," Adam demurred with a sly grin. He looked again at Kris' jacket and shirt. They were obviously new. He hoped Kris hadn't spent non-existent money buying a new jacket just for this date. He also wished he'd thought about that before asking Kris to this restaurant. 

"Ha!" Kris laughed. "You're the worst sort of troublemaker. You look all sweet and innocent and then you do the most outrageous shit and _then_ you look all sweet and innocent again and talk yourself out of trouble. It's amazing, actually."

"Why, suh..." Adam drawled in a ridiculous southern accent. "You flatta me."

Kris stared at Adam and then shrugged. "That woulda worked better with a fan." 

"I debated using my napkin as a fan."

"You should've gone with it." Kris grinned and felt warmth spread from his chest outward as Adam grinned back conspiratorially. Without thinking, he reached out, took Adam's hand, squeezed it and then raised the hand to his mouth for a quick kiss. 

_FLASH!!!!_

"Oh fuck!" Adam hissed, his eyes snapping to Kris' face, wondering how Kris would take it.

Blinking rapidly as spots swam before his eyes, Kris asked, "What happened?"

"Some asshole just took our picture because you took my hand." Adam turned around and glared at the offending patron, nodding as the hostess hurried up and began remonstrating her. 

"Are you okay?" Kris asked, his voice soft as he took in Adam's furiously intense stare. He hoped Adam never glared at him like that. "Should we go?"

Adam sighed. "I was having a really good time, but if you don't mind, I'd prefer to go now." 

"Oh. I forgot..." Kris blushed. God, he was so embarrassed. He stood up and looked down at his feet, watching as Adam's feet moved and took the step needed to stand next to his. 

Curling his hand around Kris' arm, Adam led them toward the back door of the restaurant. "What did you forget?" he asked when they were standing in the alley waiting for the valet to bring his car around. 

"I... forgot we were in public." 

Adam's head snapped down to stare at Kris. Frustrated when he could not see Kris' expression since he was looking down, Adam reached out to tap Kris' chin. "Look at me, please." 

"I'm sorry--"

"It's not your fault, Kris." Adam gently rubbed his thumb against Kris' chin. Seeing distress in Kris' face, Adam reassured him, "You're not accustomed to living in a fish bowl. Unless you informed the paps or the lone gungirl back in there, don't beat yourself up about it."

"I didn't, I wouldn't!" Kris asserted. "I just... I told you before. I'm a touchy-feely kinda guy and at first I was nervous there, but it was just you and we were having a good time and I felt close to you and I..."

"It's okay," Adam repeated and pulled Kris into his arms for a hug. Geoffrey was right -- Kris was no attention whore. Thank god. "Truly. We were having a good time and I... felt close to you too. I might have been the one to reach out and touch you. No biggie."

"Well...." Kris smiled, relieved that Adam wasn't annoyed with him. "No biggie? Depends upon what I reached out and touched, I suppose." 

Adam laughed and sighed as he felt Kris' body lean into his. Perfect fit, really. "You know how to stroke my ego." 

"That's not all I'd like to stroke." Kris grinned, then shook his head. "That was too obvious."

"Total rim shot." Adam bit his lip and waited. 

"I am not averse to you taking a rim shot at my expense..." Kris said, then laughed, turning as the valet pulled the car to a stop in front of them. "I can't believe I said that."

"It's always good to know preferences," Adam said blandly as the valet got of the car and handed him the keys. He paused as the hostess ran up and handed him the bill to add to his tab. 

Kris bit his lip to keep from making a smart comment that the valet and hostess might find too illuminating not to report, then as Adam tipped the valet, couldn't resist saying, "We already had the conversation about buttheads."

"Indeed. I'd hate to be redundant." Adam smiled as he and Kris got into the car.

"I had a great time tonight..." Kris said, touching Adam's leg. Finally, they were alone and he could touch the man. 

"Would you like to get a drink or some coffee?" Adam asked as he started the car. 

"Before my coach turns into a pumpkin?" Kris asked as he buckled his seat belt. 

"Did fairy godmother impose a curfew?" Adam put the car in gear, hoping Kris didn't have to end the night yet. 

"Nope. I don't have to be back at work until three o'clock tomorrow. I'm so glad I quit working the McDonald's breakfast shift. Even if my bank account isn't."

"Okay, that's _one_ job I've never done," Adam said as he steered the car into traffic to go to a bar that shouldn't be too crowded on a Tuesday night. "Closest I came was being a barista at Starbucks back home, in San Diego." 

"That's a hard job." 

"Most jobs are hard. That's why it's called work and not fun, right?" Adam smiled. "I'm lucky enough right now because my job is mostly fun, but I think I appreciate it more because I know what the crap work is like. So how bad was McDonald's?"

"I got free fries after my shift was over...." Kris began. "That was a huge plus." 

 

Returning to their small table in a dark corner after taking a phone call, Adam explained, "That was Geoffrey. Sorry about that, but he knew I'd be worried about that photograph and wanted to let me know he paid off that... _person_ and got her photo card, so there won't be any photographic evidence of our date."

"Oh, good. I hate that tabloid gossip shit." Kris grimaced and pushed away his empty glass, then smiled at Adam. "I never knew you could make the word person into an insult. That's my something new to learn for today." 

"Apparently you made a good impression on him, by the way." Adam tapped Kris' hand as he sat down, then turned and signaled the waitress for another drink for Kris. He should've told the waitress to make Kris' drink weaker -- for all that he worked in a bar, Kris really wasn't a drinker given how he was already smiling a little loosely after two drinks. 

"Me?" Kris frowned. Adam was too far away. He moved his chair closer. "He was talking 'bout me? When?"

"Indeed." Adam tilted his head and looked closely at Kris. Who was looking closely at him, then biting his lip. "At the restaurant. And just now. What's the matter?" 

"I don't like it when people gossip. That's how I ended up... Well, that's not true. It was probably inevitable that I'd tell my parents, my friends and that I'd end up... away." Kris sighed, then straightened his shoulders. "But onto the present. So Geoffrey. Is he always this--"

"Intrusive? A busy body? Yes." Adam shook his head and made a mental note to ask Kris about this story he was unwilling to tell right now, the reason why he hated gossip. Because that was a definite point in his favor. "He's tried to set me up. Every red carpet event, I get a phone call. Then he actually tried to convince me to go on that hideous Millionaire Matchmaker show. Although maybe that was Jacob's idea -- the pr guy."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Kris gaped. "Millionaire Matchmaker? She's always so angry. And patronizing. And unmarried herself, so how good can she be, right?"

"Right--" Adam agreed, then hid his smile when Kris went on. Kris on a tear was fun to watch.

"Ugh! I waited on her once when I was a waiter. Jerkface. Bad tipper too. Plus her voice--"

Adam winced in agreement. "And her damn rules. I mean, what was Geoffrey thinking? I'm not much of a rule follower."

"Except your own rules," Kris said instantly. Adam had his own rules of honor that he abided by.

"And I only make rules I can keep." Adam grinned. "One of which is to find ways to keep Geoffrey off-kilter."

"You two are friends, aren't you?"

Adam shrugged. "We have a friendly relationship. We like tweaking each other." Adam leaned forward and whispered, "Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm somewhat glad he met you tonight."

"Me? Why?" Kris leaned forward.

"He's probably incredibly irritated that I'm dating a guy _I_ met in a coffee shop. So I win this time."

Kris opened his mouth, then closed it.

"What were you about to say?"

"I... I was about to say that I hoped you weren't dating me just to prove a point to Brush, but..." Kris grinned. "Truth is, I don't really care _why_ you started dating me, just as long as I have a chance to prove how immensely awesome I am."

Adam grinned at the amusement in Kris' eyes, then bent at the waist and looked under the table.

"What're you doing?" Kris asked nervously as Adam sat back up with a grin. 

"Checking to see how _immensely_ awesome you are." Adam winked.

Kris gaped, then gulped, then giggled. "You... From the videos I've seen of you on stage, you're the immensely awesome one." 

Adam rolled his eyes, then looked up with an automatic polite smile as the cocktail waitress brought over a round of drinks.

"I may have favorited one or two of them on YouTube. Maybe taken screencaps..."

"You... Did not." Adam squeezed his own leg. Oh god no, not another star fucker...

"Good god, of course not! Not the way you think!" Kris protested in a soft voice, reaching out to squeeze Adam's hand. "I'm sorry. You look appalled. I was just teasing. Well, about the screencaps, anyway."

"Oh." Adam let out a long breath. 

"Although, let's be honest--"

"Let's." Adam said a prayer to whatever gods existed that this guy would be honest. Being honest with himself, he knew that he really liked Kris, felt a connection already and... Geoffrey was right. He was not someone who was happy being unattached. 

"I looked at those videos. I'm a fan, I'm a guy, a gay guy and you're gorgeous. Why wouldn't I look?"

Adam looked down at Kris' hand. Felt the small callouses on his palm as he stroked Adam's hand and nodded slowly. "Fair enough. And thank you." Then he stopped. "So. You saw those pictures?" He began pleating his napkin. "You saw those pictures that asshole took of me naked, when I was asleep--" He broke off when Kris' hand covered his own, stilling its nervous movements. Looking down as the smaller hand gently squeezed his, he waited, willing himself not to relive the horror of clicking the link Lane had sent him and seeing a photo of himself, naked, asleep and....

"I saw them," Kris admitted. He could only begin to imagine the horror of finding naked pictures of yourself plastered all over the internet, especially coming so close on the heels of the news that your last boyfriend had been using you for pr. It must have seemed like a waking nightmare, especially since they weren't exactly the kind a man wanted posted. Luckily, anyone who'd ever seen a picture of the Glambulge had to know the pictures were oh-so-wrong. "Personally, I didn't believe them." He winked.

"What? Why not?"

"Like I said, I've seen pictures of you in concert. So no way was that the Glambulge."

"Thank. You!" Adam smiled in relief. "I keep telling people that!"

"I thought it was a bad angle."

"And poor lighting." 

"And no doubt it was cold in the room." 

They looked at each other and announced, "Shrinkage!"

Adam grinned. Now, suddenly, that horror seemed _funny_. Then again, the cool million he'd made in damages -- after paying legal fees -- had given plenty of fun times. He really needed to focus on the positive that had come out of the mess.

Kris tilted his head. "So what bothers you more -- having nude pictures of you out there or having _unflattering_ nude pictures of you out there?"

"What do you think?" Adam rolled his eyes.

"Yeah. If there have to be nude pictures, they should at least be flattering."

"That was my point."

"A _little_ one..." Kris looked deadpan at Adam, who threw the swizzle stick from his drink at him. Catching it and realizing it wasn't a little sword this time, Kris sat it down and then asked, "Speaking of... Does it bug you that the fans named your erection?" 

Adam laughed. "No. What guy would be offended by people noting he has a big dick? But given how management is bitching me out about the glambulge during performances, the fact that those pictures were... diminishing was was ironic."

"In an Alanis Morrisette kinda way or really ironic?"

"I should write a song about it," Adam mused. Something humorous. That would be cathartic and he'd take control back over that moment of his life. Why hadn't he thought of that before?

"About how your cock is actually way bigger than it appeared in those pictures?" Kris grinned. "Okay, so what word rhymes with cock? Wait -- you could say, that's not a sock, that is really my cock."

Cracking up, Adam squeezed Kris' arm. "Thanks. I really haven't laughed about that whole nightmare at all before now." 

"Really?" Kris asked, surprised as he stared into Adam's warmly appreciative eyes. Had he really helped Adam out with an old hurt? He looked down at Adam's hand and covered it with his own and smiled. 

"Really and truly. Thank you for helping me see it in a new light." Adam bent forward and kissed Kris' lips and what he'd intended as a quick brush turned into a long slow burn that made him want to throw caution away like last week's issue of the Star magazine.

Blushing happily and feeling his head swim a little as Adam slowly pulled back, Kris reached blindly for his drink and drained it. Seeing the heat in Adam's eyes, Kris moved his chair closer to Adam in lieu of climbing on top of him. Yup, right on top of him, straddling his legs and... oh yeah. If they were alone, he'd have pushed Adam down and kissed those legs until... Unthinkingly touching Adam's thigh, he noted, "So, we got sidetracked."

"We did that geocaching too. I think we spent more time talking in my car and gluing glitter on doubloons than we actually did searching for the damn box." Or unfortunately, kissing, Adam thought, still staring at Kris' mouth. 

"I still say the camouflage duct tape was unfair..." Tape. He could tie Adam to that chair and... 

"Kris?" Adam asked, seeing the flare of heat in Kris' eyes before he mumbled something about taping Adam to a chair. Oh hell. Kris was a little drunk and his mumblings were both cute and hot. How was he supposed to resist him?

Kris smiled slowly and touched Adam's cheek, before leaning up to caress Adam's cheek with his lips. "I admit I like it when we get sidetracked."

Adam hissed in a surprised breath as Kris kissed his neck under his ear. And moved his hand higher. Thank god it was dark in the corner and there were tablecloths on the tables. He grabbed Kris' hand and held it still. "I guess you might say we met because we both got sidetracked when we were just trying to buy coffee." 

"Or because I couldn't find thirty-eight cents."

"Nah, I'd noticed your ass long before I realized I could play white knight for the incredibly cheap rate of thirty-eight cents." 

"White knight?" Kris repeated. "I didn't realize I'd entered a joust when I went into Starbucks that day." 

"Well, no wonder. I don't unsheathe my lance in Starbucks." 

Kris burst out laughing and leaned his head against Adam's shoulder. He sighed as he realized that he laughed more in an hour with Adam than he'd done for weeks before he'd met him. And he'd been warmer too... 

"Or in a bar on a Tuesday night." Adam put Kris' hand back on his own lap. 

"Now, that is tragic. Not that lack of glitter in daily life thing you were talking about before we went geocaching." 

"Hmm. That is a close call." Adam smiled. God, when was the last time he'd had this much fun with a guy outside of the bedroom? Or bathroom stall? "Maybe you'll need to give me the coordinates to your... box." 

"Box..." Kris laughed. "You said something when we were talking about those unflattering pics that something was ironic?"

"Oh!" Adam smiled back. "The fact that my dick looked small --"

"And wrinkly."

"I'm going to hurt you." Adam touched his own cheek, feeling the pull in his facial muscles from having spent the last few hours smiling.

"No, you're not." Kris ran his fingertips up Adam's thigh. The muscles under his fingers were hard, but the man's heart was anything but. "You're a softie." 

"You're confusing that picture with reality." Adam smiled again as Kris laughed. "It's just ironic that those pics of my dick are out there, diminishing my equipment, when my management was all over me to actually diminish my equipment."

"They wanted you to get a..." Kris gulped and crossed his legs. "A dick reduction surgery? Holy crapsticks! Do they even do that and--"

"No, no...." Adam laughed at the horror on Kris' face. "They wanted me to tuck," he leaned forward and whispered.

"Tuck? Your...." Kris gaped. "No way." 

"That's what I said." Adam shook his head. "I'm not a drag queen." 

"Besides, wouldn't it hurt if you tucked and then got excited?"

"I would think."

"At least they didn't suggest one of those chastity devices." Kris laughed when Adam raised an eyebrow. "I'm a guy, I've looked at internet porn. So, no chastity devices?"

"It would show through my pants."

"Yeah. Given how tight your pants are. Which..." Kris dropped his napkin on the floor and bent over. Sitting up straight with a grin, he finished, "Is not a complaint on my part. For the record? Your pants can be as tight as they want to be."

"Oh hell." Adam groaned, then grinned. It had been a long time since he'd had this much fun flirting. A long time. "My pants are feeling tighter by the minute." 

"Are you about to show me how immensely awesome _you_ are?" Kris moved his hand slowly up Adam's thigh, feeling the muscles tighten under his touch. 

"Not if I avoid standing up." 

"Or I could drop my napkin and take a look for myself." 

"I'd rather you dropped your pants. Go into the bathroom and wait for me," Adam joked, then laughed when Kris' eyes got huge. 

"Oh!" Kris gasped. "I...uh..."

"I shocked you?" Adam asked, his voice low.

Kris touched his cheek. "I'm probably bright red. I try to be all sophisticated, but..."

"But...?" Adam said slowly when the silence stretched out. "If you want to get stuck on your butt, I'd rather it be in my wet spot, however--"

"Adam!" Kris laughed. "Truth is, I try to be all sophisticated because it seems like a person needs to be out here. And I'm not innocent. I'm not."

"Okay. You don't need to prove it to me." Tilting his head and studying the blush still visible in the low-lighting of the lounge, Adam decided that irrespective of the background check, no one could blush on demand and his instincts were telling him that Kris was just a normal guy struggling to find his way. Like everyone. 

"I used to be more... less..."

"I get it." 

"Well, you know. I...uh... when I first came out here and... came out, I guess I had something to prove."

Cutting to the chase, Adam asked bluntly, "So you slutted around?"

"Yeah." Kris shook his head. "It wasn't fun--"

"Then you were doing it wrong," Adam retorted, although he knew what Kris meant. Which surprised him yet again. This guy had been surprising him from the moment in Starbucks when he'd turned around and Adam had discovered that his face was even more attractive than his ass. 

"C'mon!" Kris laughed. "You know what I mean."

"Actualllllly...." Adam said softly, wondering if he should be truthful. Looking into Kris' eyes, he tuned into his instincts and listened. Then spoke, "I do know what you mean."

"I thought so." Kris touched Adam's hand. "I have a feeling that maybe we both..." He flushed and stopped. Adam was so.. warm and approachable and when he wasn't working on being careful, he was so open, Kris was afraid he might overstep. 

"What?" Adam asked softly. "We both what?" 

"This is going to sound pushy, which is not me." Kris stopped, looking at Adam's curious, but patient expression. Interesting, the way Adam was both patient and aggressive. Pushy too, sometimes. Pushy. That was not the old him -- the Arkansas version of him, but the person he'd become through choice and necessity? Yeah, he was more pushy than he used to be. Then again, he had goals he wanted to achieve and... damn, Adam was beautiful. And he might be a little tipsy. 

"Really? You were the one who asked me out first, remember? And the second time?"

"Oh yeah!" Kris shook his head. "So, not me. But..." He trailed off as he seemed to lose his train of thought while looking into Adam's eyes. "But I didn't really have a choice since I didn't think you were going to make the first move. But now... Well, here goes. I get the feeling that maybe we both are looking for the same thing. Someone special." 

"Are you?" Adam hesitated, then pulled back and took a long drink from his glass, willing himself to caution. Careful, careful, he told himself. Remember the last time... But then he looked back into Kris' eyes and surely, they wouldn't be so open and trusting if he wasn't all the way to the core. 

"I am," Kris said firmly, reaching out again to pull Adam's hand into his own. Did Adam feel the same warmth he did? Given the look in those blue eyes, yes, yes, he did. Kris felt his heart begin to race and his eyes dropped to Adam's mouth. 

"I thought you weren't pushy," Adam prevaricated to keep from kissing Kris.

"I didn't use to be but... I guess, actually, that is one thing LA's taught me -- if you want something, you need to go for it. No one's going to hand you anything. You gotta work for it." 

Adam nodded in agreement. "Truer words were never spoken." 

"So I gotta know -- are you interested in something long-term or are you just cruising for a short-term convenience?" Kris asked. He froze, shocked at his own assertiveness. He looked down at his glass and shook his head. Courage from alcohol or... was it need? Or a volatile combination of both? 

"Well, that's blunt," Adam prevaricated. His nature and his instincts were telling him to be honest, but being honest had left him vulnerable before and... Damn, Kris' hand felt good, his calloused fingertips stroking the back of Adam's hand. 

Kris sighed, then shrugged. Adam had baggage, but then again so did he. Even steven. "Okay, I'll be blunt again. I'd accept being a short-term convenience, but I want, what I want _most_ is a long-term relationship with someone special. In fact, if I'm being totally open--"

"A state in which I'd like to park my touring bus," Adam joked, trying to use humor to keep his heart from hearing only what it wanted to hear in Kris' words. Not yet, not until the background check and time... time revealed all. 

Kris burst out laughing. "Just how big is that glambulge when it's not cold?" 

Adam smiled and relaxed. Kris' honesty had made him vulnerable. "Okay, my truth is that I'm looking for love. Apparently I was looking in all the wrong places--" He stopped. "God, I just uttered the worst cliche. Or song lyric. It's a song lyric, right?"

"That's already been sung by Waylon Jennings," Kris teased. 

"Who? That sounds country. So, yeah, that is a cover that's _not_ happening. Although..."

"You could Ring-of-Fire-it-up." 

"Could or would you go up a ring of fire?"

"If you do it right, it shouldn't feel like fire."

"If I do it right, oh hell yeah, it should feel like fire," Adam said in a low tone, making a circle in the center of Kris' palm.

Kris gulped. He wanted to look down, but couldn't tear his gaze away from the heat in Adam's blue eyes. He licked dry lips and whispered, "I think I'm way outta my league."

"We.... " Adam lifted his hand and brushed his thumb along Kris' bottom lip and offered, "We could be in a league of our own." He stopped and grimaced. That was cheesy and if Kris were a typical LA twink, he'd mock him endlessly. 

"A girl's baseball team?" Kris grinned in relief at Adam's offer, which had been cute. He confided, "I did use to play baseball." 

"I'd like to see how you handle a bat." 

"Well...I'm going to the men's room right now. You could follow me and watch..." Kris offered teasingly as he stood up. He smiled as Adam rolled his eyes. 

"Go use the little boys' room while I settle the tab." Adam slapped Kris' butt and leered as Kris walked away and glanced back over his shoulder. 

 

"Well, that was a disappointment," Kris griped to his reflection in the mirror. He'd been hoping Adam would meet in him in here, but nothing. He sighed as he bent his head to wash his hands, then turned around. 

"Oh?" 

"Whaaat?!" Kris gasped as strong hands whirled him around, then moaned as a mouth he already knew instantly took his lips and a hand gently encircling his throat stole his breath away. 

Feeling the sound of Kris' moan against his fingers, Adam bit Kris' bottom lip and when Kris gasped again in excitement, took his mouth with his tongue, feeling his cock harden with every needy stroke Kris' tongue made in return and with the clutching hands encircling his back, pulling him closer and closer. He backed Kris up against the wall and lifted him higher so their cocks could rub against each other, then gasped himself when Kris' right hand moved around his body and inside his ever-tightening pants. Curling his right arm around Kris' body until his hand cupped his ass, Adam forced his hand between them, pressing hard against Kris' cock until they both groaned, then gasped for air, their hands still rubbing and pressing needy flesh. 

They broke apart, staring at each other in surprise. Looking into shocked eyes, they grinned and said simultaneously, "Immensely awesome."


	5. Bite Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 5: Bite me  
Rating: PG-13**

"No!" Monte exclaimed. He raised his guitar over his head and walked over to his case, ignoring Adam spluttering behind him. "Just let the flow, the music, happen more naturally. You're overthinking this to the point of torturing it."

"Totally!" Tommy agreed. "Don't you have some place, _any_ place else to be? Or _someone_ to do? Didn't you meet some boy in Starbucks? Shouldn't you be reaming him out instead of us?"

"I was not reaming anyone out." Adam glared at Tommy. 

"Maybe that's the problem," Lane quipped, swinging her legs back and forth while sitting on the table. She grinned when everyone else burst out laughing, except for Adam who flung himself down on the couch. 

"And how did you know I met a boy in Starbucks, anyway, Tommy?" Adam asked, turning to glare at Lane this time.

"Ooops. Was it a secret?" Lane asked, opening her eyes wide. 

"Oh get over it, Adam." Monte picked up his case and walked toward the door. "We didn't need Lane to tell us. You've mentioned him a few times." 

Cam nodded. "Yeah, you've told us how you met him -- scrapbooks and scepter stories over Starbucks. That you bizarrely went geocaching with him. That you think he's not eating enough."

"He has a nice butt too," Lane offered. "I think Adam's mentioned that."

"No, he didn't." Tommy hid his grin. 

"Well, that's an oversight that needs to be corrected. He has a nice butt." Lane smiled.

"So why aren't you pounding that instead of this song over and over and over?" Tommy complained.

Monte leaned against the doorjamb. "Seriously, bro. Take a break. You're not happy with this music. Take a break and figure out why. Or even better yet -- relax! Even for a few hours. Let your brain recharge. And then we'd get a few hours off too. Why not go on a date? You haven't gone out with this guy again, have you?"

"Adammmmm...." Lane shook her head. "You told me you'd been on the phone with him--

"And I have!" Adam protested. "I've just been too busy to _see_ him."

"Make time!" Everyone chorused.

Adam pulled a pillow out from under him and hugged it across his midsection. "Well, before you think it's all my fault, he works at night and he needs that job. I did happen to mention that he looks too thin, didn't I?"

"I _personally_ would set up an open account for him at Whole Foods or the supermarket of his choice if he would take you off our hands for a few hours. A few hours! That's all I'm asking for!" Tommy whined. He turned to Lane, "Do you think we could just pay him to screw the man? Simple transaction?"

"He's not that type of boy." Lane shook her head. "He's a _nice_ boy." 

"Seriously, _don't_ talk about him like that. He's not a whore. And what is wrong with you all?" Adam frowned. "Am I that...bad?"

"You need to let off some steam. Which for you means either a lot of club dancing and or having sex. I vote for sex myself." Tommy grinned and ducked when Adam threw the pillow at him. 

"You're turning into a workaholic. Or more of a workaholic, which in your case, means you're becoming obsessive." Monte sighed. "Listen, you need to have some balance."

"You need to have sex," Tommy added. 

"Fun, fun would be good." Cam smiled. "You remember fun, don't you?"

"Sex is fun." Tommy laughed as everyone else groaned. 

Adam stomped toward Tommy and wrestled the pillow back from him only to beat Tommy over the head with it. "I went out the other day with Dani and Alisan and had fun."

"Really?" Monte raised his eyebrows. "You had fun and you're _still_ this uptight?"

"I was right. He needs sex." Tommy grinned and ran for the door. "Maybe Lane should call this Kris up, make a date for Adam since he seems to have lost his mojo..."

"You know, Tommy, I think you're right..." Lane leaned back for her bag and began rummaging through it for her phone. "After all, I am the personal assistant and this is certainly a personal problem with which he needs assistance..."

"Oh for fuck's sake!" Adam jumped to his feet and glared at each person in turn. "I can take care of my own love life!" He stomped from the room. 

 

"Do you think that worked?" Cam whispered as the sound of Adam's footsteps receded.

"Hope so. We could really use some free time," Monte whispered back. "We're spending so much time here, my kids think we're back on tour. Plus he really _does_ need some balance."

"And love." Cam shook her head. "I don't get it, why he can't find a decent guy?" 

"Poor Adam." Tommy sighed. "First he-who-shall-not-be-named using him for all those months just to get ahead in the biz, then asshole who took those pictures."

"It would be enough to put anyone off their feed," Cam noted. 

Monte shook his head. "He needs to get back on that horse again."

"Kris is more pony-sized." Lane grinned. 

"But is he a pretty little pony?" Monte asked, thinking of his daughters' vast collection of those toys.

"Absolutely...Wait. I forgot to show you all...." Lane rummaged in her huge bag, before pulling out her iTouch. "When I was checking out the first background check--"

"You were doublechecking the background check?" Monte asked, frowning. "That seems excessive."

"Yeah, well, if we had done that with he-who-shall-not-be-named, Adam wouldn't have gotten involved with him, right?" Lane countered, waiting for everyone to nod in acquiescence. "Good. So we're all on the same page. As I was saying, I called Brush's lead junior agent, Hannah, because it turns out that Kris interviewed with Brush's agency seeking representation. Hannah liked Kris a lot."

"She did?" Cam asked. "Hannah's kind of a hard nose."

"Yeah, she defines the phrase hard-hearted Hannah," Tommy agreed, wrinkling his own nose.

"Agreed. But you know how she loves Adam? Well, when I told her I was calling about Kris' background check, she told me not only that she also really liked Kris, but _also_ said they would be a good match. I pretended that I needed to be convinced..." Lane grinned.

"You should have worked for the CIA," Monte muttered. Lane came up with information and just... stuff that you had no idea how to acquire. And didn't want to know. 

"That would be MI-6, old chap."

"Good god, she's leaning heavily on the British accent," Tommy whispered in a loud voice to Cam. "That means she did something underhanded, but wants us to think it's was respectable."

"Whatever it takes," Cam retorted. 

"Whatever it takes to get us some free time..." Monte whined.

"Sex. He needs sex." Tommy nodded. 

"Adam's not in the room to bother with that anymore," Lane told him.

"Who said I was doing that just to bug Adam? I think it's the truth." Tommy wiggled his eyebrows. 

"Anyway." Lane stared at Tommy until he shuffled his feet. "Hannah may have been operating under the belief that I needed to be convinced that Kris would be a good match for Adam. So... You know how Brush has his assistants videotape everything so he can review them?"

"Yeah, total control freak." Monte nodded.

"Which is why he and Adam get along _and_ drive each other crazy," Lane offered. Holding up the iTouch, she added, "Hannah emailed me Kris' interviews. I have them."

"Well, are you going to show them to use or should we go home?" Monte asked, picking up his guitar case once again. 

"What is the fun of having the intel and not torturing you all with it?" Lane sighed and pressed her fingertips to the screen. "Hold on.... Here are two interviews. First he talks about his own music, of course, then.... Just watch them all, but pay attention to the one where Hannah takes his iPod." 

_"Who's on my iPod?" Kris nodded and dug into his backpack. He turned it on. "Do you want me to just read my list or..."_

_"Can I see it?" Hannah's voice came from off-screen as her hand extended into the frame._

_"Uh, sure..." Kris shrugged and handed it over. He rubbed the back of his neck while Hannah made no sound at all, then began asking him about individual tracks._

_"So, summing up..." Hannah handed the iPod back to Kris. "You like pop. I see a lot of male singers with guitar bands. And Britney."_

_"Well, who doesn't like Britney?"_

_"Yeah. And... You like Adam Lambert, don't you?" Hannah asked from off-camera._

_"Oh yeah. I love Adam Lambert."_

_"You even have fan vids from concerts on here."_

_"I...uh... Well, the truth is..." Kris blushed. "I got to go to one of his concerts -- his first solo tour. Best show ever!" He grinned as he raced on with his story. "I went up north to visit relatives and we went to the show in Milwaukee. He had a lot of glitter on and that top hat and his voice was awesome and best of all, he _writhed_ on the steps during the encore of Whole Lotta Love. I'll never forget that! I think that's probably my most viewed video on my iPod."_

_"So... you're gay?"_

_"Uh... yeah. Yeah, I am." Kris' face closed up. "Is that a problem?"_

"No. It's us singing the freaking Alleluia Chorus!" Tommy exclaimed, clapping his hands excitedly. 

Cam clapped too. "Oh, the gods have smiled upon us. He's short and cute and southern and is into music. And Adam's music."

"And he blushed." Monte grinned. "So that means he's probably sweet." 

"What did I tell you?" Lane asked.

"You're right. He also seems nice and like he has a sense of humor. He's... perfect. Or so it seems." Monte sighed. Maybe he'd get home in time for dinner occasionally if Adam had someone like Kris to distract him. 

"Well, except for the plaid," Tommy noted.

"Ha!" Lane grinned. "That gives Adam an excuse to go shopping. Plus, he's polite _and_ a mama's boy."

Cam laughed. "Oh god, I could weep. It's Adam's holy grail." 

"Now, if he just gets together with him again..." Lane tapped her foot. "Do you think we harassed him enough?"

 

"Kris..." Adam began apologetically.

"Oh crapsticks! I know that tone of voice. Do not tell me you need to reschedule again," Kris groaned. It wasn't Adam's fault that they couldn't see each other, he was just so busy. To be fair, they'd talked often and for long times on the phone when Kris got off of work at night and to be even more than fair -- to be honest, those calls were the highlight of his day, but still. He wanted to be with Adam, in person. And you know, touch him. Or be wrapped up in one of Adam's awesome hugs. "I'm sorry for whining. I'm just frustrated that our every attempt to go on another date has been stopped. Who designs your schedule? Some minion of the Parents' Television Council or something?

"What?" Adam laughed. He enjoyed it when Kris went on a tear. He'd learned that Kris was pretty laid back, but he had his opinions and his PMS moments. 

"Well, given that we're no closer to having another date or having sex than we'd been two weeks ago." Kris took a breath, then blushed. "Uh..."

"Are you blushing?" Adam asked, slightly amazed that he knew Kris well enough to guess he'd be blushing right now. Then again, one advantage to only being able to talk to each other for two weeks was that they had actually talked and gotten to know each other without the distraction of Kris' eyes or his lips or his ass or... Well, now _he_ was getting warm and wondering why he thought he'd needed sleep these last two weeks when he could've, should've found some time some how to see Kris. Or why he'd thought after nearly taking Kris in that bathroom that keeping some distance to get control made sense when he'd wanted nothing more than to get closer. Not that he was a control freak or anything.

"I'll never tell." Rubbing the back of his neck and glaring at his fellow bartender, who was grinning while blatantly eavesdropping, Kris added, "Not that I haven't enjoyed talking with you on the phone." They'd talked on the phone almost daily and he'd never had better conversations with anyone, ever. Which was the truth, the whole truth. "You're... easy to talk to."

"What you mean is that I never shut up."

"Well, around you, I can't seem to keep my mouth closed either." Kris smiled and rubbed his thumb over the curved edge of the bar. 

"Have I mentioned that quality is uber-attractive to me in a date?"

"Adammmmm!" Kris laughed. 

"So, his name is Adam?" John pounced. "That's the name of the guy whose ring tone makes you smile like a teenage girl seeing a Jonas Brothers magazine?"

"Shaddup!" Kris hissed. "Besides, the Jonas Brothers are so two years ago."

"You're right. I wonder who my daughter likes these days. She kinda threw Joe Jonas over when he cut his hair."

"That's _fascinating_. Can I possibly continue this conversation with Adam?" Kris asked, gritting his teeth.

"Oh sure, don't let me stop you." John grinned, then yelped and jumped back when Kris threw an olive at him. He'd been watching Kris in surprise -- ever since he'd started here, the guy had only been animated when they were watching sports and now he got excited over a ring tone? He wanted to meet this Adam. 

"Sorry 'bout that," Kris mumbled. He reached for a knife and pointedly slashed a lemon while glaring at John over the bar. 

"It's okay," Adam assured him with a chuckle. It was nice to get independent confirmation from a total stranger that Kris smiled when he called. That was an involuntary reaction and... Adam, you need to unclench and try trusting people again. And besides Lane said his initial background check was fine. "Wait 'til you meet my nosy friends. Which won't be today. But... tomorrow morning, when we were supposed to have breakfast, you could meet some of the people with whom I work."

"What? Why?" Kris gulped. 

"I have to re-record some backing vocals on a track. I know you've done some session guitar work, but I thought since you want to record vocals yourself someday, that you might like to go with me to the recording studio?"

Kris gulped again. Watch Adam Lambert record music? "Uh, yeah," Kris said, hoping he sounded appropriately LA cool. "That sounds..." Kris gave up and grinned. Turning away from John and speaking a low voice, he admitted, "Actually, I'm not cool enough to carry this off. It sounds awesome! I've never been in a recording studio when vocal tracks are being laid down and to hear you..."

"Well, it's tedious," Adam warned, even as he felt flattered by Kris' eagerness. "And not glamorous..." 

"As opposed to looking for a tiny box covered in camouflage duct tape?" Kris shrugged. "I... honestly... I'd be happy to go with you to pump gas and oh god, I just made the mistake of being overeager, I'm like a puppy or something and... " Kris paused when he heard Adam chuckle, what he thought of as his evil chuckle. "Hey -- don't make a joke about having me panting and licking... "

"I wasn't going to!" Adam teased. 

"Yes, you were! Don't lie." Kris smiled, as he turned back around and picked up another lemon.

"Yes, I was going to make that comment. And I never lie. I tease, but I don't lie."

"Good. I don't tell lies either." Kris stabbed another lemon before slicing it efficiently. "So what time would we go?"

"I realize it's early for you, but can you be awake for nine?"

"I think I can manage to be ready at nine."

John snorted. "I think you won't go to sleep at all because you'll be too excited." He couldn't wait to tell his wife that Sad Sack Kris had finally started smiling on a regular basis and he knew the name of the reason why. 

"Shut up!" Kris laughed and threw a lemon slice at John. "What kind of bartender are you? You're giving away all my secrets."

 

"Mmm... I can't blame John this time..." Kris murmured, his lips brushing against Adam's. "The fact that I basically jumped you the minute I got in the car gave away that secret." 

Adam slowly opened his eyes to look down into Kris' face. The smile on Kris' pinked lips brought an answering smile to his own face. That and the fact that Kris spoke the truth -- indeed the second Kris had closed his car door, he'd reached for Adam and given him a hungry kiss. "What secret?" Adam whispered, bending his head down to kiss Kris once more, eager for another taste of that yielding mouth. So...damn... sweet. Reluctantly tearing his mouth away when Kris began to moan and he could feel his pulse pound in his cockhead in time with Kris' moaning, Adam repeated, "What secret?" 

"That I..." Kris licked his bottom lip and played with the ring on Adam's left hand, rolling the silver skull from side to side. Tell or not, tell or not. Oh hell, Kris thought, he really wasn't a secretive kinda guy and whenever he tried to keep secrets they always came back to haunt him and Adam was so... He looked up and got distracted by the warmth in the blue eyes staring at him so intently and said, absently, "That I really like you and I'm so glad we're going out -- face to face -- again. That when I saw you, I just hadta kiss you." 

Adam felt a shocked warmth spread from inside and over his cheeks at Kris' words. Seeing his surprise reflected in Kris' eyes, he relaxed, turned his his palm over and squeezed Kris' hand. Warmth spread from his hand over his body as Kris held on tightly. "We should probably stop making out in the car though."

"Why?" Kris pouted, hoping Adam would smile. Adam was no doubt worried about the paparazzi. He hadn't seen any, but that didn't mean they weren't there. Kinda like roaches. He'd sure learned about roaches since moving out here, so why not other bugs like those damn gossipmongers. 

Pinching Kris' bottom lip between his thumb and index finger, Adam grinned. "Stick that lip out and I'll find something to put on it."

Kris gasped as he felt his cock fill just because of Adam's words. What the hell was it going to be like when they actually got naked? Which was now the goal of his life. 

"Hmm. What are you thinking about?" Adam gave in and swooped down to bite gently on Kris' lower lip, feeling his heart thud when Kris groaned. 

"You... You are a _naughty_ man." His mouth needed to be on Adam's skin, Kris thought. Why was the guy so covered up? Making a small noise of frustration before tugging on the collar of Adam's tee-shirt, Kris tilted his head to move in to lick Adam's neck, slowly. God, he tasted good. Why hadn't they seen each other for two weeks? Bad idea. "Naughty, naughty..."

"Does that mean you won't give me any presents?"

"Nope. I'm poor, but generous. My present would have to be homemade."

"Hand-made?" Adam asked, his hand slowly trailing from Kris' waist over his hip, gratified when he felt the muscles under his hand tighten, and Kris hold his breath.

"Oh..." Kris bit his lip to keep from crying out and drawing attention as Adam's hand lightly brushed over the bulge Kris had been growing since he'd opened the car door and seen Adam smiling at him. "You..." Kris gasped when Adam's hand pressed more firmly. "Oh god, you need to stop!" He cried out and grabbed Adam's wrist to pull his hand away. It had been so long since someone he'd liked -- actually liked as a person he knew -- had touched him... 

"I know the feeling..." Adam whispered as Kris' ragged words faded away and Kris blushed as he no doubt realized he'd verbalized his thoughts. It had been...well, it felt like forever since a guy he'd really liked had grabbed for him like he was the last martini at a party. "It's great to _see_ you." Adam smiled as he cupped Kris' cheek, then let out a low guttural sound when Kris rubbed his face into Adam's palm. "And touch you."

Sighing, Kris nodded. "You know, you need to know that although I wanted to see you, I've really liked talking with you on the phone," Kris began, before turning his head to kiss Adam's palm. He had no idea what it was about Adam, but he just wanted to eat him up. And failing that, their phone calls were the most fun he'd had since moving out here. 

"It works out that you're still wired when you get off of work and I'm a night person anyway." Adam smiled and reluctantly removed his hand to start the car. He stared out the windshield, wondering why he felt closer in a few weeks to a random guy he'd met in a coffee shop than people he'd known for a long time. The universe could really fuck with your head. 

"You should come by the bar sometime," Kris offered, then immediately changed his mind. "I mean, no. Actually, you shouldn't. It's not a nice bar, not fancy." 

"Kris. I'm really not snobby," Adam said as he drove off, aware that Kris had not invited him into his apartment building to pick him up, but had insisted upon meeting him on the street. Did Kris actually live there? Or... was he actually that paranoid? 

"I know." Kris shrugged. "I'm... self-conscious, I guess. It's not what I imagined myself doing when I moved out here. I had grand plans. And I'm tending bar."

"Best laid plans? I know the feeling. We've all had crappy jobs. I spent a lot of time folding jeans. And other less salubrious tasks." 

Kris bit his lip. He had no idea what that three dollar word was. "Did you ever tend bar?"

"No. But I was a singing waiter."

"A singing waiter? Like in one of those fifties-style diners?"

"No. Actually that might have been better since people specifically visit those diners expecting, wanting to be entertained. They're not more interested in their chicken and green beans and wondering how they're supposed to eat while paying attention to these guys singing next to them. Or worse..." Adam laughed. "Was the time I did so-called dinner theater, only the guys were more interested in the fact that the female singers were topless."

Thinking of some of his old friends back home, Kris laughed. "Well, to be fair, that would be distracting to a straight dude."

"Probably. But I yelled at them to stop talking while we were singing."

"You did not!" Kris shook his head, but he already knew enough of Adam to know that he would do that. The guy was bossy and... Kris smiled as he remembered how Adam had been Mr. Bossy Hands in the woods, pushing him and pulling him. God, those hands. He touched his tongue to his lower lip as he watched Adam's hands on the steering wheel. He had nice hands. That belonged on his skin. Sooner rather than later. Well, he could have something, he decided, and reached out, running his fingertip down the length of Adam's ring finger, then across the back of his palm. 

"I did. The audience needs to respect the artist and of course, the artist has to respect the audience. That's why lip-synching or live autotuning when the audience doesn't know it's happening is so heinous. It's disrespectful to the artist and the audience and it also degrades art. What do you think?" Adam looked over at Kris, then back at the road, waiting for Kris to comment, having grown to expect Kris to take time to formulate a thoughtful response.

Kris rubbed his fingers back and forth over Adam's hand, then nodded. Adam actually did want to hear his opinion. It seemed like it had been a reallllly long time since anyone gave a shit about what he thought about anything other than sports. For all that Adam talked, he was also a great listener. "That makes sense. How can we expect people to appreciate real artistry, what it takes to sing well, when they're not really hearing singers singing well? But I still don't know that I'd have the guts to yell like that."

"You have to have confidence and control when you're on stage. Sometimes the audience is on your side and will support you when you're nervous or tentative, particularly if they know you're new or if they feel they know you. But most of the time? They'll eat you alive." Adam snapped his teeth at Kris, laughing when Kris jumped.

"You're not making me feel better about my chances. I don't know that I have enough confidence for _that,_ " Kris mused, even as he tucked away Adam's advice for later thought. Adam was giving him good suggestions, invaluable really given the man's stagecraft. 

"Practice. That's the key. Practice and keep getting in front of audiences, learning from their response, getting a tough skin -- you really need to get tough in this business," Adam suggested, then stopped. He pressed his lips together as he remembered all the advice he had given to his so-called last boyfriend. 

Seeing the flicker of embarrassment that passed over Adam's expressive face, Kris instinctively touched Adam's arm in commiseration. "Hey. He was a jerk. And stupid on top of it." Totally stupid. Adam was the kind of guy you kept forever, not someone you threw away when what seemed like a better career offer appeared. 

"Thanks." Adam smiled and touched Kris' hand. Kris seemed to be a truly nice guy and didn't deserve Adam's suspiciousness. Thank god for Kris' easy-going nature and how interesting that his occasional prickliness had not sprung up then. "And you're not him. I know that. I'm _sorry_."

"It's only natural. It's okay." Kris rubbed Adam's arm and realizing Adam would prefer a change of subject, did so. "But speaking of practice -- when you're not touring or recording, do you practice regularly?" 

"I usually do scales every day, regardless of whether or not I'm recording or singing. It's important for me to keep my voice in practice. And I also found that running helps my stamina and endurance -- and not just for singing..." He leered at Kris, who grinned. 

"We could go running together," Kris suggested. "Maybe that would be a good way for us to spend time together. Although..." Kris looked down at the long length of Adam's legs. "I'd have to take two steps to your every one step," he laughed. 

"I bet we could find a way to work it out." Adam nodded. "That's a good idea. Remind me later to open my schedule so we can get organized." 

"Totally." Kris smiled eagerly. "Although I haven't run in a while, so give me a little time to get back up to speed so I don't totally humiliate myself." 

"Believe me, humiliation doesn't kill you." Adam rolled his eyes. "If so, I would have died... oh quite a few times recently. But at least one of them was the gift that keeps on giving."

"You mean the settlement you got from the tabloid that published that photo -- you gave the money to Donors Choose, right?"

Adam looked at Kris in surprise. "You know that?"

Blushing, Kris reminded Adam, "I told you the first time we met that I was a fan. Is that freaking you out?"

"I don't want a star fucker," Adam said honestly. 

"And..." Kris said running his hand up Adam's leg. "I don't want to fuck a star. I want to fuck _you_." Kris squeezed Adam's thigh, then hearing a small groan, looked up at Adam and flushed at the heat in the blue eyes looking so intently at him. "Oh hell. Did I say that out loud?" Kris groaned. 

"Have I mentioned how much I appreciate your honesty?" Adam smiled as he turned off the car. "And your patience."

"What do you mean? That you were busy for two weeks?" Kris shrugged. "That's the way it goes."

"Well, that. And the fact that you... understood that my past sometimes get in the way. I'm working on it, I _promise_."

Kris nodded and touched Adam's hand. "That's okay. We all have baggage. We all need to be patient with each other -- give each other the gift of grace."

Adam turned his hand over to hold Kris' and looked down into the warm brown eyes gazing up at him with honesty in their depths. How the hell had he been lucky enough to run into this guy in some coffee shop? He didn't know how to reward the universe for the effort, but he could show Kris. He'd like to show Kris, naked, preferably. "I should reward you. What would you like?"

"A kiss?" The words were barely out of his mouth before Adam's tongue was inside it, swooping in and taking him, taking him to a place he'd never before gone in ten seconds. Or maybe... Kris moaned and tilted his head back, opening his mouth wider, urging Adam to take and... oh yeah... give more. Maybe he'd never been here at all, he decided, as he held on for the ride. 

 

"Adam records a lot of his own backup vocals because he has such a full range," Dwayne explained as Adam settled into the recording space and then signaled for play back. 

"Oh, cool." Kris nodded. He shifted eagerly in his chair and listened silently as the raw audio filled the small room. 

"Why are you re-recording them?" Kris asked Dwayne three minutes later. "I'm no expert, but I don't hear anything wrong with them." 

Dwayne grimaced. "It's not my idea. It's because Adam is a perfectionist control freak. He's the nicest guy; I love him, we all do. But damn, do your best or don't come to work. And he's worst of all on himself. He's probably been lying awake at night, fretting over some perceived imperfection..." Dwayne stopped as Adam made a motion with his hands and moved a lever.

"He said he over-thinks..." 

"Yeah." Dwayne smiled. "But it's his music, it's his name on it. He gets to be all picky about it." 

Kris nodded and an hour later, realized that picky did not begin to describe how Adam approached recording music. Damn, he was sweaty and he wasn't even singing. Then again, it could be that watching Adam in what was clearly his element -- or at least one of them -- was damn hot. He sighed in relief as Adam announced he had to take a break. The door immediately opened and a youngish man in a suit stomped in while Adam grimaced. 

"So... Kris." Dwayne looked over his shoulder as Kris watched Adam talk to Jacob the Jerk. The suit was such an asshole and if he didn't watch it, Adam was going to have his ass fired from Adam's project. And merriment would ensue in the hallways. Best part was that Jacob was always frustrated, because Adam was totally oblivious to Jacob's interest in him. He hadn't rejected Jacob, he just didn't even see him that way, which made Jacob insane. Actually the best part was... As Jacob looked up in the booth and obviously saw Kris, Dwayne grinned. "So. You're the guy." 

"I.. Excuse me?" Kris asked, feeling his shoulders tense. 

"In between re-recording music that was perfect the first or second or third times...you're _The Guy_ that Adam's been talking about." 

Kris looked down and rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't know about that." 

"We do." Dwayne grinned. "Oops, the boss is glaring at me. I don't know if it's because I'm not doing my job or because I'm talking to you and he's getting all territorial. Or because, poor man, he's talking to Jacob."

"Ugh. Poor Adam is right. I met Jacob."

"Poor you." 

Watching Adam shoo the other man out of the booth with a well-placed hand on his back, Kris grinned. Adam looked like he'd prefer to plant his boot on that guy's ass and give it a good kick. A moment later, Kris hitched his own butt forward on his seat as Adam began to sing. 

 

"Kris, you sing," Adam said an hour later after he'd finished singing, had talked to Jacob again -- or rather, Jacob had bitched about how he needed to have fewer dark songs on the cd or it was going to be a Kelly Clarkson _My December_ debacle, which really he didn't consider a debacle, just a different direction, but he took Jacob's point, the bottom line was the bottom line and... he needed to refocus. Kris had returned from the bathroom and was now looking expectantly up at him. "Do you want to play around in the studio while I step out for a minute to talk to my manager? I'll pay for the time and Dwayne here can set it up for you." Not that he was testing Kris, he just wanted to hear Kris' voice and-- 

"No, thanks," Kris said immediately. He hadn't needed anyone to tell him that Adam Lambert's last boyfriend had used him to get free publicity so he could get into the music business. Last thing he wanted to do was give Adam any fears that he was the same and... Kris frowned. Adam was testing him. Probably unconsciously, but still. Then again, just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you, right? Adam had good reason to test. He relaxed and shrugged. "This is your gig, not mine." 

"Good answer," Dwayne whispered.

What the hell? Kris frowned. "I can wait in the lobby."

"No." Adam shook his head. "That's unnecessary. Stay here. Dwayne, why don't you show Kris how the board actually works? I saw you paying attention, Kris, so get a lesson from a pro." 

"Yeah, maybe you can become a pro yourself," Dwayne agreed.

"What does that mean?" Kris asked, wiping his hands on his jeans. This whole visit was nerve-wracking. He patted his pocket, aware that he'd stolen maybe too much TP, but damn, TP was expensive. 

"What it means is that if you can't make enough money at your own music, there is always a need for people in the booth. It takes a good ear," Adam explained. "So, if you're okay here, I should be back in less than half an hour. I promise I won't get talking and forget about you." 

Smiling up at Adam, Kris nodded. "Sounds great." 

Adam leaned forward and impulsively pulled Kris into his arms, then whispered in his ear, "I have a feeling I'm not going to forget you, period." 

Kris blinked in shock as Adam bit his ear lobe, then sauntered away. "Thank god for tight jeans..." he said under his breath.

"There's a song for you to write," Dwayne joked. "You are a song writer, aren't you? I think that's what Adam said. In one of the katrillion times he's mentioned you." 

"Yeah. And Adam is definitely... inspirational." Kris smiled, then looked worriedly over at Dwayne, who was shaking his head but laughing. Hmm. Maybe... it was time to stop being worried about being accepted. New place, new people... yeah, new life. He grinned back. "So, you were going to show me that board?"

"Sure. If you think you can tear yourself away from contemplating what words rhyme with 'Adam's ass.'"

 

"Was that too boring?" Adam asked as they sat down in the corner of the coffee shop with their drinks. He pushed a muffin toward Kris, determined to get him talking enough to eat it without noticing.

"Hell, no!" Kris grinned. He had gotten to hear a track from Adam Lambert's newest album before it had been released even for review. Damn, he was lucky. "It was fascinating."

"You like the technical aspects?" Adam ran his hand up Kris' arm and rested it on Kris' shoulder, giving it a light massage.

"I didn't realize how much went into it -- making a record, a sound, I mean." Kris sighed and leaned into Adam's touch, realizing how much he'd missed just being touched and how glad he was that Adam's physically affectionate nature was filling a need he hadn't realized he need filling until meeting him. "There are so many options, not only in terms of how to sing a piece, but what you do to it afterwards. It's... kinda mix of hearing the finished product in your head first and what you hear as you go through the process - making changes. Or I guess some people just know right from the beginning what sound they want... Then again, I guess everything can be improved, right?" 

"I am known for being a little picky." Adam moved his hand away from Kris' shoulder, realizing that Kris would not eat as long as he was touching him. He picked at his nail polish as he once again contemplated his dissatisfaction with most of the tracks on this album. What was wrong? Technically, they couldn't be better -- or so Dwayne and Geoffrey and even Jacob told him. But there was something...

"I would've never guessed..." Kris said drily, but with a smile. "But how about when you're recording something live?"

Adam nodded and looked back up. "My manager thinks I'm better at live recordings because I can't over-think them." Actually, his manager had told him just yesterday that he'd been over-thinking everything for a long time and that he'd been over-thinking dating Kris too. Which made him think his manager was talking to his mother, who had also berated him two days ago for not finding time to see Kris in person again because -- she said, humph -- that he'd liked Kris too much. And... Lane and the band. Everyone thought he was over-analyzing. He sighed. He was over-thinking about over-analyzing. 

"I don't think your recordings actually do you justice," Kris said abruptly. Leaning forward, he poked Adam's bare arm. Those freckles... "I mean, the studio recordings. I like your live performances waaay better." 

Adam arched an eyebrow. "You said that emphatically. And poked me. You have an opinion."

Shredding his muffin into little pieces, Kris looked down and noted, "It's my o _pin_ ion. I have a right to it."

"Obviously," Adam drawled, smiling at Kris' prickliness that seemed to appear when he was nervous. He almost didn't want Kris to get more relaxed around him. "You're like a hedgehog."

"Whaaat? What?" Kris asked. 

"My friend Alisan has a hedgehog for a pet. It's so cute. Little. You can hold it and pet its spikes down and it would just be so happy and its spikes were nice and smooth. But if it got angry or scared...." Adam wrinkled up his nose and his face into a grimace, held up his hands and spread his fingers wide and poked them in Kris' direction, laughing when Kris swatted at him. "It would get all spikey, curl up in a ball and look at you all seriously, not realizing how small it was." 

"If you say I'm cute when I'm agitated..." Kris grabbed one of Adam's upraised hands and squeezed. He leaned forward over the table, wishing they were alone so he could just jump on the guy. 

"You'll what?" Adam squeezed back and leaned forward. He'd enjoy soothing Kris' quills.

"I'll...." Kris pondered. "I know. I'll sing one of Danny Gokey's country songs. Loudly," Kris suggested with a shot in the dark. Seeing Adam's mouth immediately twist into disgust, Kris laughed, then laughed again when Adam circled his wrist and squeezed in what was no doubt meant to be a warning, but felt more like a promise. He'd been right when he'd thought Adam and his American Idol runner up had been like oil and water. "Ha!" He paused, then asked curiously, "How obnoxious was that guy, really?"

"This is just between us?" Adam asked and when Kris nodded, wide-eyed, Adam leaned forward to whisper. "He grew on me. Like a fungus. I had to take antibiotics after the tour." 

Kris laughed. "So. I will sing a Gokey country song. With a really deep twang--"

"Oh god no!" Adam shuddered and released Kris' wrist. He looked at it, imagining it in his hands, held over Kris' head and then shook his head to clear it. "I give in."

Kris stared at Adam. Somehow he knew Adam wouldn't surrender that easily -- the guy liked getting his own way as much as possible, so... Aha! "What do you mean when you say you'll give in?"

"I won't say you're cute when you're agitated."

"You'll just think it!" Kris accused instantly. 

"Exactly." Adam took a sip of his coffee.

"And I'll _know_ you're thinking it."

"Exactly." Toasting Kris with his cup, Adam grinned. "My god, it's the holy grail. A gay guy who's both hot and smart. Now, eat your muffin."

"Arrggh!" Kris reached for his muffin and realized he was still holding Adam's hand. Looking up at Adam sheepishly, Kris gave him an embarrassed smile and released his hand. To give his hands something to do other than molesting Adam in a coffee shop, he began eating his muffin. A few bites in, he paused and asked, "So you think I'm hot and smart?"

Adam grinned, then looked at the uneaten muffin in frustration. Someone should eat today. "If you don't eat that muffin, I'll eat you up." He snapped his teeth together. 

"That's hardly an incentive for me to eat that muffin." Looking around and seeing that no one was looking at them, Kris held his wrist up. "Go ahead and bite." 

Reaching out and snapping his hand closed around Kris' wrist in a tight ring, Adam forced Kris' arm down to the table. He bent forward until his lips were coasting along the outer rim of Kris' ear and whispered, "The first time I bite you, I'll be holding you down by the wrists while I bite your nipples." 

His breath leaving his body in a harsh gasp, Kris turned his head until their lips were nearly meeting. "And that'll be the first time I scream for you. First time." 

Bringing Kris' wrist to his mouth, Adam kissed it, then gave a sharp nip. "Have I mentioned yet that I like you? A lot?"

"I could stand hearing it again..." Kris urged, staring at Adam's mouth. 

A careful glance reassuring him that they were being ignored, Adam bent his head to Kris and whispered, "How about I show you?" just before pressing his mouth fully against Kris and feeling satisfied for the first time in a very long time. 

 

"I got them together." The barista nodded in the direction of the corner. 

"Sandy, no, you did not," Her coworker argued.

"Totally, Tyler. If I hadn't made the little guy dig for thirty-eight cents, he would have been long gone before Adam came up behind him." 

"Not necessarily. He could've sat down inside and Adam would have seen him when he came in. And then their eyes could have met..." Tyler sighed.

"I know you want to be a screenwriter, but that's putting it on a bit thick, doncha think?"

"I agree with Tyler," another barista said as she poured milk into a cup. "If someone is your destiny, you find them regardless."

"Destiny, schmestiny," Sandy scoffed. "Life is totally random."

"Is not. There may be random elements," Tyler argued. "But we all have a path." He grinned as Adam approached the counter. "Want another muffin for Kris?"

"I'd like a sandwich, please." Adam pointed at the glass case. "I think I can con him into believing that I changed my mind and get him to take it home. So what were you talking about -- a path?"

"Oh!" Tyler grinned. "Ha. I bet Adam will agree with me. Sandy thinks life is all random. And I think there is destiny. Who do you agree with?"

"Me?" Adam glanced back over his shoulder, smiling automatically when he saw Kris watching him with a smile on his own face. "Destiny. I mean, I think we make choices that lead us down certain paths, but in the end, the universe will have her way. So, for me... I vote for destiny."


	6. Date at the Museum

**Chapter 6  
Rating: PG-13**

"A museum?" Danielle asked, reaching up to touch the new purple streak in Adam's hair. "You're taking this boy to a museum? On a date?"

"I am." Adam nodded and sat forward to play with the stack of magazines on Danielle's coffeetable. "I'm going slowly. Trying to do things differently this time, since my old modus operandi wasn't working. What's that definition of insanity -- doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome."

"A museum. Well, that certainly is different," Danielle admitted as she peered carefully at Adam's face, while sitting next to him on the sofa. He looked... excited. For all that he said he was going slowly, being cautious, he definitely looked excited about this date. To a _museum_. Which meant that it wasn't the location of the date, it was the guy. "I need to meet this guy."

"You will, if you stop acting like I'm a philistine who's never been to a museum."

"Well, sorrrry for impugning your honor!" Danielle teased. "But seriously, why a museum? Is there an exhibit on erotic art or something?"

"Do you think that all I think about is sex?" Adam sniffed and looked down his nose.

Danielle giggled. "Yeah, when you haven't had it in this long. There's a story I could sell to a tabloid -- Mr. Rock Sex God hasn't had sex with anyone other than his hand in--"

"Shhhh!" Adam warned, then burst into laughter. "I know, right? It's pathetic." 

"The wear and tear on your stage pants is what's pathetic," Danielle teased. 

"I need to get laid..." Adam groaned. "Geoffrey and Jacob were bitching at me about and I quote, 'The too-frequent appearance of the Glambulge when you perform on stage.'"

"I don't believe it." Danielle shook her head. Adam's manager was such a repressed Englishman, it was hard to imagine such a conversation. Or more to the point, Geoffrey had enough obvious affection for Adam that... She looked up at Adam, who was, of course, still talking. 

"I somehow doubt Robert Plant had a discussion like that with _his_ manager." Adam rolled his eyes. 

"That was the Seventies, babe. The world was different." Danielle grinned. "Now, Mr. Rock Sex God is taking his boy to an art museum."

"You're a girl. You're _supposed_ to appreciate the fact that I'm trying to get to know the boy and see if a relationship is viable before having sex." Adam waited and when Danielle merely looked incredulously at him, he added, "You know I've had that rule for a long time that when I'm not looking for a trick, I don't have sex before the third date."

"Yeah. You're so old-fashioned it's a wonder you haven't been nominated for a board position at Focus on the Family." Danielle shrugged. "So after the museum -- and which date would that be, hmm? Go dancing and have sex in the bathroom of the club. Or even more novel-- take him home."

"You shock me, young lady!" Adam gasped in mock horror. The notion of taking Kris home was, however, one that had occurred to him a few times already, but the last time he'd done that, he'd fallen asleep and the world now thought he had a little dick. 

"Hey, don't say that around your manager. He might get the idea that he could keep the Glambulge down by applying electrodes--"

"Ow! Stop it!" Adam laughed. 

"Stop it, yourself. But maybe you do need a shock to your system to get back into the dating game. I mean, you need to do what's right for you, what your gut tells you to do. But you've put up a lot of walls, Adam. You need to knock them down. If you have to do it slowly, brick by brick, then I'll support you. But you need to find your way back into love."

"Find my way back into love?" Adam looked at Dani curiously. "That sounds familiar... Oh! It's from that Hugh Grant movie with Drew Barrymore with the pseudo Britney Spears character..."

"Music and Lyrics." Dani nodded. "I love that movie."

"You have a weird love for Hugh Grant." 

"Speaking of weird... You're really going to the Getty?" Danielle asked, knowing that once Adam had made his decision, it was immutable. "We went there once for some drama performance, right?"

"See, a visit there is memorable, isn't it?" Adam smirked.

"I bow before your insanely effective date-making skills." Danielle bent at the waist and bowed, fluttering her hands as she moved. "I know I totally wanted to jump your bones after watching a one-man Macbeth performance." 

"I bow before your _bitchiness_." Adam grinned. "That actor was seriously creepy though, remember?"

"Actually, I do." Dani shivered. "Is that what you're doing today? Taking him to some creepy play so he can hang onto you in fear? That is a good plan. Classic ploy--"

"No. And I don't think Kris would scare as easily as you, you wimp."

"I''m not a wimp!" Danielle sniffed. "I just don't like creepy stuff. So what are you doing there?" 

"We're going to the galleries today. It's safe," Adam blurted out. 

"Safe?" Danielle echoed. She put her hand on Adam's arm and asked, "What's really going on, babe?"

"Truthfully... it's been a long time since I had sex, Kris is hot as hell and ..." Adam blushed as Dani chuckled. "Judging by the way he attacked my mouth in the car and the way he.... " Adam smiled. "Well, I guess he thinks I'm hot too and... I don't want to rush this, Danielle. Last time..."

"Oh." Danielle slid her arm through Adam's and rubbed her cheek on his shoulder, then turned her head and bit his shoulder. "Last time you rushed into bed with someone, he rushed a pic of your dick to the tabloids. And it was a bad pic of your dick." 

"Can you take the damage to my delicate male ego seriously, please?" Adam smiled while rubbing his shoulder. 

"Get a grip on yourself." Dani rolled her eyes. Adam had been taking that situation too seriously for too long, but he'd just made a joke, so maybe... time was healing the wounds. And maybe the interest this Kris had in him wasn't hurting either. 

"That's about all that's been happening down there for many months." 

Dani laughed. "I mean, it. Everyone knows you have a big dick. What _is_ it with guys, anyway? Sometimes I think there should just be a national registry with certified measurements of every guy's dick, just to stop all the posturing!"

"Would there be pictures? Because I could totally get into it if there were pictures--"

"You pervert!" Danielle giggled. "So why are you going in the morning anyway?" 

"Kris works at night, so we usually have to meet earlier in the day. And for the record, the museum is also safe because the paparazzi can't get in since the museum doesn't allow photography. And besides that, I have my reasons--"

"It's related to work, isn't it? Are you scouting for a video location?" Dani asked, shaking her head. Adam had always been so focused on his work, but now, he was going overboard. Compensating for a lack of a love life. Classic sublimation. Maybe Kris would give him something else to focus on. 

"Something like that. And anyway, I'll have a good time with Kris. He's _real_ ," Adam said emphatically.

"You've said that before. That he's real and normal."

"I guess it's such a rarity in Hollywood, it's like a unicorn."

"Speaking of searching... are you really going to send Lane to Arkansas now that the partial background check came back perfect?"

"It was _her_ idea. Honestly, I think she's more paranoid than I am."

Danielle nodded. Adam's experiences of betrayal had hit all of them hard. "But you think the full check is going to come back just as good as the partial?"

"I hope. I mean, I have no reason other than my own paranoia to think he's anything other than he says he is, right? And for now, this date... I enjoy talking to him, being with him. He has these little prickly moments, but.." He grinned. "He's like a little hedgehog when he gets aggravated. It's cute. I want to pet his quills down when he gets prickly." 

"So let me guess, you aggravate him just so you can ... pet his quills?" Danielle asked. Adam thought this Kris was cute when he got prickly? This was fascinating. 

"Something like that. But he's easy to be with. Normal, but fun, you know? Hell, I had a great time geocaching! In the woods. Do you believe that?"

"No. I've actually had to see a therapist about it since you told me. Because, my whole world order has been shaken by the fact that bug spray was involved and yet you went out with him again...." Danielle mused, watching Adam stick his tongue out at her, then look down at his hands to play with his rings with a small smile on his face. He really seemed to like this Kris. "Hey, if there are no paps there, you could always have sex in the Getty bathrooms!"

"What, are you my procuress now?" Adam laughed. He sobered as his mind immediately began imagining Kris up against the wall in the bathroom and oh yeah.... "Wait, those bathrooms would be safe..."

Danielle laughed. "You reallllly are hard up. And what do you mean by safe, anyway?"

"No cameras. No one could set up cameras in anticipation and --"

"Adam Lambert!" Danielle snapped. Time for some tough love, she and Leila had decided. She reached out and flicked Adam in the forehead. "Stop being so paranoid. This Kris sounds like a perfectly nice boy. Didn't Lane confirm from the agency that he was a nice church boy from a small town--"

"They're always the biggest freaks in bed, Dani." 

"You're just hoping!" 

"Maybe...." Adam smiled. He was hoping quite a lot since he'd bought an extra cup of coffee in Starbucks.

 

 

"Where are all the naked men?" Kris mused, as he looked around the gallery. Lots of naked women, but no naked men.

"At the bathhouses," Adam retorted. 

"You could catch a disease there," Kris said primly, then spoiled the effort by looking into Adam's amused eyes and laughing. The museum was beautiful, but he'd rather be looking at the sheets on Adam's bed than art, or better yet, into Adam's eyes while lying on those sheets, because his eyes were the most beautiful thing in this museum. 

"Do you often catch?" Adam asked, his fingers softly stroking Kris' palm.

"Almost always." Kris closed his hand around Adam's fingers and squeezed tightly.

"Perfect." Adam licked his lips, then groaned as he remembered they were in public, in an art gallery. Why had he thought it was a good idea to have dates in public? Oh yeah, to be safe. Being safe was probably overrated. "You know, one reason I suggested we come here was--"

"To avoid coming?" Kris winked. He'd invited Adam up to his apartment again after their last date and had been somewhat shocked when he refused the obvious invitation. Adam had hesitated to be true, but then had refused, saying it was too soon. Whodathunkit? Then again, who'd think he was being aggressive with a guy? Somehow, Adam inspired rule-breaking. "It's a good thing I hate gossip, so I'll never tell anyone about the details of our dates, because no one would believe that Adam Lambert was the one preserving my virtue." 

"I'm in favor of the preservation of endangered species. I believe I've even tweeted about it." 

"What don't you tweet about? And which species would I be?"

"Hmm. Good question. You're a combination. Like a platypus." Adam nodded, pleased with his inspired comment. Give Kris a moment and steam would come out of his ears.

"Like. A. Platypus." 

"Yes, a combination creature."

"A. Combination. _Creature_." Kris rubbed his hand over his hair in aggravation.

Adam hid his grin. "Are you hard of hearing?"

"Why would you think _that_?"

"The way you keep repeating what I'm saying." When Kris glared at him, Adam raised his hand and rubbed Kris' back. "Okay, well, if you need hearing aids, I know someone who can help. Otherwise, back to my idea."

"You mean, how I'm like a furry little creature with a duck bill?"

"It's a mammal that lays eggs -- it's literally a freak of nature that breaks all the rules of science and yet has survived thousands of years. Someday it will probably teach us that the way we classify living creatures is wrong."

"That's actually..." Kris paused his speech, felt the warmth of Adam's hand on his back and thought about Adam's words. "That's actually cool." 

"Like I said.." Adam said with exaggerated patience. "Anywaaaay. To return to my point, sometimes you're like a panda -- all soft and cuddly. Other times, you're more like a tiger -- aggressive."

"So does that make me a tanda or a piger?" 

"I'll get back to you on that." 

"You know, I'm not really aggressive. Not usually. I'm easy going." Kris paused and considered Adam's words once again. "Well, I used to be really easy-going. Maybe too easy-going. Maybe... actually, _sometimes_ I was passive," he realized, remembering standing there, waiting... Maybe he should have barged in, demanded, argued. No maybe about it. He should have. "Sometimes. Not always, but maybe one time too many." 

"And now?" Adam stroked Kris' shoulder, down his arm, and took his hand. 

"Being on my own, completely on my own for two years -- you can't survive in this world by being passive or even, too easy-going."

"So, you're trying to meld the needs of your current life with the person you were or were taught to be or what worked in your life before?"

Kris thought and then nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I guess that's it. I guess, I'm..."

"In transition?" Adam asked. When Kris nodded again, Adam stroked his palm again. "When or if you want to talk about it, I'm happy to listen. And I can keep a secret." 

"Thanks." Kris gave a small smile of relief and squeezed Adam's hand. Not only could he follow Adam's very unique trains of thought, Adam seemed to get him in ways that he didn't think anyone else ever had. Maybe destiny did need... He looked up into Adam's warm eyes and felt a tight cold coil inside him loosen. "Maybe... Yeah. I will. You're... safe," he blurted out. Feeling his cheeks fill with color, Kris shook his head. "I didn't sound very... manly just then." 

"You _are_ a man. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise," Adam suggested, having an inkling of some of Kris' baggage from his family, a family that seemed to both attract and repel him. And being a Cancer, he had a strong need for intimacy and safety in relationships. "We all have a right to feel safe. Especially with people we should be able to trust -- our family, friends, partners... The world can be a scary enough place and if we don't have a safe harbor in our loved ones' hearts and arms, then that says more about them than us. Don't you think? What do you think?"

"I... Yeah, you're right. We should be able to feel safe, to feel... trust that the people who say they care about us will hold us close to their hearts." Kris leaned against Adam's side, absorbing the warmth. He wished they were alone so he could just... he didn't know what... just get close to him. "Thanks for listening to me. I will talk to you more about why I'm in transition, about... before. Just not now." 

"That's fine. Whenever you want." Adam put his arm around Kris and gave him a quick hug. "Maybe you're just proving your sign correct. You're... a Cancer, right?"

"Did you seriously just ask me what my sign is?" Kris teased, remembering how Adam had talked about astrology on one of their many phone calls. "You don't get to ask me that unless you're also plying me with alcohol." 

"Fine. Let's go back to talking about balls." 

Kris smiled and looked unseeingly around the gallery as they walked into yet another room. "Okay. I used to play ball--"

"Don't tell me you've given up ball!" Adam teased. "Because if so, why did you accept my invitation for this date?" 

"Baseball." Kris elbowed Adam. "I played baseball in high school and then on a rec league afterwards."

"What position were you? Let me guess, shortstop?"

"Ha, ha, ha." Kris rolled his eyes. "You weren't on a sports team, right? You were into drama."

"Yeah. In gym class, I was the perpetual outfielder. Which was fine with me and fine with everyone else. No one wanted me to try to catch a ball. You may have been multi-talented, being in band and playing a sport, but not me. I know my limits." 

"Oh, puh-leeze, you're totally coordinated. You could catch a ball if you wanted to." 

"There are lots of things I could do with balls. And I want to." Adam leered with a look at the front of Kris' jeans.

Kris laughed. "I don't think I'd make you _catch_ mine."

"Oh, you'd just give up the play?"

Kris sighed. "Honestly, for a smart guy, you can be kinda stupid. In case you haven't figured it out _yet_ , I'm ready and more than willing to give up the whole kit 'n caboodle to you." 

"Kit 'n caboodle?" Adam laughed. "Who says that?" Just Kris. God, he was charming. 

"Out of that statement, you're picking on my phraseology?" 

"Well, to continue with the theme..."

"What theme?"

"Balls, boy. Balls." Adam sighed melodramatically. "Keep up with the program. We were talking about balls. I'm wondering if you shave yours." 

"Shave? People shave their..." Kris looked around and whispered, "Their balls?"

"Or wax them."

"No frickin' way!" Kris gaped. "That would hurt! Why would anyone do that?"

"Because..." Adam bent his head and whispered into Kris' ear. "It makes them more enjoyable to lick and suck."

"WH--" Kris yelped, his voice muffled when Adam pulled him into his chest. "Whafumualfizght!"

"Is everything all right here?" the security guard asked, taking a step in their direction.

"Just...uh...fine!" Kris squeaked, raising his head from Adam's chest. "He...uh... told me a dirty joke and I was...uh... shocked." He tugged on the hem of his plaid shirt. "I'm from a small town and don't get out much." 

"Well, son, you're in LA now. Get out more." The guard nodded at Adam, looking at his black jeans, boots, sparkly shirt and purple streak in his hair. "You're _obviously_ from around here, so show him the sights." He nodded again and went back to the wall. 

"Well. You're supposed to show me the sights," Kris said after a moment.

"I am showing you the sights," Adam noted, looking at Kris speculatively. That down-home act had been convincing. He shrugged. There was paranoid and then there was ridiculous and a wise person knew the difference. "The Getty is a world-renowned institution dedicated to preserving the arts and educating people of all ages and backgrounds--"

"Did you do a voice-over for them or something?" Kris asked. 

"Good call, Mr. Allen." Adam nodded. "They teamed up with Donors Choose to bring art into the classrooms and I did an introductory bit in their video for them." 

"When did you have time for that?" Kris asked, thinking of what he knew of Adam's hectic schedule. 

"You make time for what's important to you." Adam shrugged and then patted the phone in his pocket. "Thank god for Lane and the calendar in my phone. I'd be lost without them both."

"What did we do before these phones?" Kris asked absently as he bit his lip and considered how Adam had worked on making time for him. He only wished Adam had been more willing to find time to come up to his apartment, although he didn't even have a bed, just a chair, but Adam could sit in that chair and... did he shave his balls? He must and -- 

"You should get out _your_ phone and make a note." 

"Oh, crap, where is my phone?" Kris asked patting his pockets.

"I think you left it in my car."

"I keep leaving that phone..." Kris scowled at his own inattentiveness. "But what did I need to make a note about?" Kris asked in confusion. Had he daydreamed about sucking Adam's balls and missed something important?

"You were daydreaming about sucking my balls?"

"I really have to stop doing that...." Kris moaned, turning into Adam and planting his face on to Adam's chest, then wiggling closer. 

"Thinking aloud? Why stop? I'm enjoying it." Adam grinned. He was more than enjoying it, he was finding Kris' inability to filter his thoughts... relaxing because it was so revealing. Although the way Kris was now rubbing against him was the opposite of relaxing. 

"Well, if your balls are the size of those melons you sent me..." Kris grinned. "I'd hate to have to chop them up the way I had to chop up those melons to get them into my mouth..."

"Eeee-ooowwww!" Adam hissed, his face twisted into a painful grimace. 

"Hey, so what did I have to make a note about?" Kris asked with a smug grin, tilting his head back to look up into Adam's face. 

"Oh. About making sure you shave your balls," Adam whispered, watching Kris' mouth move. Why had he thought going to an art gallery was safe? There seemed to be no safe place with this boy. 

"Oh god..." Kris groaned, feeling all the blood rush right to the area in question. "I'm gonna kill you... I'm getting a hard on in an art museum." 

"Ha. And Danielle thought this was a bad place for a date." 

Kris shook his head, while thinking that there was probably no bad place for a date with Adam. 

Smiling down at his happy face, Adam allowed himself to believe that there weren't going to be any bad dates with Kris. 

"Aren't you 'sposed to be looking for video ideas in the artwork?" Kris asked finally, remembering what Adam had told him when he suggested the outing. 

"You're supposed to be helping me. All you're really helping me to do is develop a case of blue balls." 

"Which wouldn't match your hair, so we can't have that!" Kris laughed.

Adam grinned. "We need to focus." He sighed and took a step back.

"I was trying to focus before, when I asked where are the nude guys."

" _Sure_."

"No, really. Why _are_ most of the nudes women? Do you know?"

"Because most of the sculptors were straight guys -- or the sculptors we know about, whose work was saved."

"Makes sense." Kris nodded. "Wait. The David statue. That guy is like perfect."

"Amazing ass." Adam grinned. "When I was in Florence last year, we went to the museum and in the gift shop they sell postcards and book marks just of the statue's ass."

"No shit!"

"Seriously." Adam smiled in remembrance of everyone's amusement in the store. As much as he loved being home, he loved being on tour with his band and crew. "The bookmark is the best." 

"You bought one?"

"Are you kidding? I bought _boxes_. Gave them out as party favors on my birthday." Adam laughed. "My brother was _thrilled_."

"Maybe he was just jealous that his ass doesn't look like that." 

Laughing, Adam agreed. "Could be. Then again, anyone could get an inferiority complex in Italy. There's always a naked statue of a guy with a great ass looking you in the eyes." 

"Always?" Kris teased.

"I swear. There is a lot of public art in Italy." 

"Why do you think that is? I mean, look around the museum -- so much of the art is Italian."

Adam thought, then remembered something he'd read somewhere about creativity. "Wait... I read something once. Something about how in Italy they had the Borgias, warfare and poison and produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance, while the Swiss had centuries of peace and all they produced was the cuckoo clock."

"So drama is needed for art..." Kris wondered aloud. "Is that what that quotation was about?" 

"Well, think about it. If there's no drama, then why would you write a song? Or would you write about it, but not that often, since there's not a lot of change in happiness -- or is there? What do you think?"

"Good point. There aren't a lot of songs about contentment in everyday life."

"And yet..." Adam pointed toward a painting of a domestic scene. "There is beautiful visual art from the everyday life. Why can we create and appreciate a painting of a single moment with no drama, with -- as you say -- contentment, but we can't seem to make music out of it?" 

"That's a good question. I ... don't have the answer," Kris said slowly as he considered. Today had been fun, low-key, low-drama, and he was happy. Happy walking around an art museum just talking, but how did you get a piece of music out of that? It was a good question. 

"Well, think on it and get back to me. I'd like to know what you think." Adam touched Kris' shoulder. He would like to know the answer to that question. Catching sight of a painting label, he pointed to it. "Hey. Caravaggio. I remember seeing a painting of his in Florence." 

"Which city in Italy is your favorite?" Kris asked. "Wait, I bet I know."

"Do you?" Adam asked, holding his breath as Kris' hand reached out and touched his stomach, before hooking into his belt loop and holding on as they stood in front of the painting.

"Venice."

"Bingo." Adam raised an eyebrow in surprise at Kris' correct guess. Sometimes... Kris seemed to know him so well... It made their relationship seem longer-lived than it really was. Then again, they'd spent so much time talking on their dates and during that two week break he'd self-imposed to get control, that maybe they had taken the steps in the right order. 

"So, what about Venice appeals to you?" Kris asked. Adam was in a talkative mood today and he had a feeling Adam was ready to carry on right now. He pulled Adam toward a bench and they sat down. 

“Venice is... voluptuously and dirtily decadent. It's luxurious and dangerous and decadent at the same time. It's...almost like it's fiddling while Rome burns, but the city isn't burning, it's crumbling and sinking into the sea.” 

"What does that mean?" Kris laughed. "You make it sound like a big-bosomed lady falling out of an old gown while drinking a glass of wine. On a crumbling balcony."

"Dead on. There's is just something so contradictory about it, something old and yet vital and alive, something mysterious and yet sharp... You wander around, thinking you can’t get too lost because after all it’s just a series of islands. Interconnected islands. You turn this way, then that, you cross a bridge and you think it’s just a little bridge, ten steps, it won’t take you too far off course, but it does. You end up walking down a street that’s really not even an alley, it’s a hallway complete with ceiling and then suddenly, there’s a burst of light where some wonderful person decided not to pave over the sky and you stand there and look up and drink in the sun like it’s manna from heaven. Then you walk again, going this way and that, crossing another bridge, then another, even though you thought you were retracing your steps."

"Go on," Kris urged. He could listen to Adam's voice forever. 

"You end up in some piazza, some square that is a dead end, deserted except for some pigeons or if you’re lucky a kid with a soccer ball that looks the worse for wear having been dunked into those canals a few too many times, and you’re all twisted around, trying to find the entrance that’s now an exit. Then the fog sets in and it seems like you’re walking in a waking dream and it seems like it’s not now, but the past and if you looked hard enough you could see a woman’s brocade skirts swishing around a corner.” 

Kris licked dry lips and realized he’d been sitting there, rapt, with his mouth hanging open as Adam set the scene. “You really.... need to write a song about that. But... how do you find your way out?”

“Someone told me to listen for the bells from St. Mark’s and follow them.” Adam lifted his hand and gently outlined Kris' lips. “That’s the romantic way to do it. The smart way to do it?” Adam grinned. “If you’re on the main island and you look up, there are small signs on some of the buildings that point the way to St. Mark’s Square. Yeah, sometimes all it takes is paying attention and there are the signs.” 

"The signs..." Kris whispered, staring up into Adam's eyes. 

"They're not big, those signs..." Pressing his thumb into the center of Kris' bottom lip, Adam hissed in a breath as Kris' tongue flicked out and then slowly licked the pad of his thumb. Oh hell, he'd thought the galleries were safe. He was going to push Kris down on the bench, spread his legs and... "Uh, those signs... Yeah, they're not... big." 

"Really?" Kris glanced down. "Looks big to me." 

Adam grinned. "Flattery will get you everywhere."

"Even Venice?" Kris smiled back, then flushed with embarrassment, hoping Adam didn' think he was fishing for an invitation. Hurriedly, he added, "I'd take Venice Beach! I haven't even been there."

“You haven't been to Venice Beach? How about Universal or Disneyland?" When Kris shook his head, Adam told him, "We can go to any of them, including Venice Beach any time. But I'd love to go to Venice -- the real Venice -- during Carnivale, for that party. I can’t imagine what it’s like during Carnivale time. The creepy cool costumes--”

 “The capes!” Kris said eagerly.

“Yeah, the capes," Adam said slowly. If it worked out with Kris, they could see Venice at Carnivale time together. Maybe. "And seeing those masks in the mist, wondering who they are -- friend or foe.”

“Or worst of all, someone who doesn’t care who you are,” Kris said softly, looking away, then back into the present when Adam began to speak. 

“Or maybe worst of all is that it’s someone you thought you knew, but once the mask is removed, there’s nothing real there.” Adam passed his hand over his face, then lowered his voice to a near-whisper. “Imagine taking off the mask, slowly and then the horror begins because there is nothing but grey mist behind it.” 

“Holy shit!" Kris blinked and shivered. "You know how to tell a story. You really need to write a song about this. Maybe even an album theme.”  

Adam blinked. “I never... Maybe. A video, for sure.” 

Kris nodded. Adam was a visual thinker. He opened his mouth to add a comment, when his stomach growled. "Oh no..."

"Let's go eat." 

"No..." Kris began, then gave in. He was hungry and Adam apparently wanted to feed him. He hadn't missed the fact that he'd gone home with tons of protein bars from their first date and a sandwich Adam had bought at Starbucks on another date which he'd somehow forgotten he disliked until after it had been wrapped up to go. "Okay. I could eat." 

"Great." Adam smiled and guided Kris toward the cafe. He'd considered making a reservation at the restaurant, but that would smack too much of forethought and Kris obviously had more than his fair share of pride. 

Sitting opposite Adam, Kris frowned as he looked from his cheeseburger to Adam's mushroom sandwich with a side dish of fruit. The amount of food Adam ate really didn't seem enough for a man of his size. He lifted his eyes toward Adam and wondered if Adam partly enjoyed watching Kris eat in some sort of sublimation for what he wasn't eating. Did Adam ever eat like a normal guy or was he always so disciplined? "So. When you were in Italy -- is the food everything it's supposed to be?" 

“The food?" Adam nodded, then pointed at Kris' meal and flicked his finger, urging him to eat. Waiting until Kris began, Adam smiled as Kris gave in and demolished the hamburger. "Actually, in northern Italy, the meals are mostly grilled meats, not so much pasta. So it's almost like being on a variation of the Atkins Diet."

"How about in Venice? Seafood right, since it's on the ocean?" Kris asked, then reached out and snagged a strawberry from the top of Adam's fruit bowl, grinning when Adam slapped his hand.

"We went to a good little local seafood restaurant on Burano, which is an island near Venice. Totally different feel -- the houses are painted in Disney Technicolor colors. Had the best fries there, ever.”  Adam moaned, then sighed and began methodically eating the remains of his fruit. Fruit was good. Fruit was great. Fruit was really as good as fries. Yup, keep telling yourself that, Lambert.

“Musta been cooked in lard,” Kris surmised as he cleared the table and they began walking back toward the galleries. "The fat makes food taste better." 

 “I don’t want to know.” Adam shook his head, then grinned. “I tried not to think about it when were in Italy -- as long as I could easily get into my stage costumes, I told myself it was okay. My brother on the other hand..." Adam rolled his eyes. "I got him back though. I sent him on a wild-goose chase for a mask in Venice. He got totally lost -- for three hours!" Adam laughed at the memory of Neil's aggravation. "Then _I_ got lost right off of St. Mark’s and found this immensely awesome teeny tiny little gelato stand. Seriously, no more than two people could stand in it at once! Including the server."

"Then you'll love my apartment." Kris grimaced as they walked into a painting gallery.

"I'm sure, like the gelato stand, the important aspect of it is what's inside." Adam paused and nodded toward a painting of an elaborately dressed noble family in an equally elaborate room. "It's trite but true, that money doesn't buy love or happiness."

"Although it doesn't necessarily hurt." 

"Probably not. And you do need money to buy that gelato." Adam moaned as he thought about eating gelato off of Kris' stomach. Or the curve of his lower back. 

"How good was it?" Kris asked with a grin. Adam was damn fixated on that gelato. He wondered if there was anywhere in LA to buy it. He could afford to treat Adam to some gelato, yes, he could and that would be a good use of the money. 

"It was amazing. Although it wasn’t as good as this one gelato place in Rome. It was near the Pantheon and in Rome, they put cream on the gelato, but in that place that put double cream. Cream in the bottom of the cone and in the top. That was the best. Now, we also had really awesome pistachio gelato in...” Adam frowned. "I don't remember. I'd have to go back through my Twitter. I think I tweeted about every single gelato place." He laughed.

Kris smiled at Adam's recollections. “I have an item for my bucket list. Going on a gelato tour of Italy.” 

“Oh god.......” Adam moaned. “That would be heaven. Then again, it would be hell afterwards -- burning off all those calories.”

 “Agony and the ecstasy.” 

"Oh god, the mint chocolate gelato... I prefer the ecstasy myself. " 

"By yourself, apparently," Kris grumbled under his breath, looking away from Adam's face as he contemplated gelato. Meanwhile, Kris thought, he was contemplating licking gelato off of Adam and... you are in _public_ , Kris. 

Clearing his throat, Adam forced himself to look away from Kris licking his lips while staring at Adam's groin. "How... Kris, how did you guess Venice would be my favorite?"

"The masks and costumes at Carnival time." Kris smiled when Adam nodded. "Have you ever gone?"

"No. It's on my bucket list." Adam took Kris' hand and held it in his. "How about you? What's on your bucket list?" 

Kris stopped in mid-stride, staring down at their hands, slowly rolling them so that Adam's rings glinted in the light. "I... Wow. I just realized. I've stopped dreaming. I was just so focused on surviving...I stopped dreaming." 

"You need to keep dreaming. It's what helps keep you going." Adam waited until Kris nodded, then tugged him forward. "So, think about it. What were your dreams in the past? Are some of them still good? Or do you need to make all new dreams?"

"I guess it's a combination of the old and the new. I want my own house. Kids. To make some money on my music -- enough to pay my own way. I'd love to travel more. Like I told you before, I saw Spain and Thailand, and Morocco before I got sick there. Ugh. But I want to see Italy. Greece. Some place tropical and sit on a beach. Other than that... I guess... Oh, I know." Kris nodded. "I'd like to do some missionary work again."

"Wow, that's very altruistic of you."

"Well... " Kris shook his head. "It is a good thing to do, to help others. But here's my question. Don't you think that in part, people tend to help others because it makes them feel good?"

"You mean about themselves?"

"Not just that, but... don't you get a good, happy feeling inside when you do something good for someone else?" Like, say, Kris thought, when Adam found a way to feed him? "We tend to repeat the stuff that makes us feel good," Kris said softly, reaching out to hold Adam, then looking down at their enjoined hands. They looked...right, together. 

"Would you like to repeat this stuff? Would you like to go another date?" Adam asked softly.

"Yes!" Kris said immediately, his voice louder than he intended. Seeing the curious glances sent his way, he looked down at his feet. "I mean, yes. I would like that. A lot."

"Good," Adam said happily. "So... being with me..."

"Makes me feel good. Oh yeah." Kris smiled up at Adam, surprised when he saw a touch of uncertainty in their depths. How this man could ever doubt... Well, not around him, he wouldn't, Kris vowed and stood on tiptoe to brush his lips against Adam's. "And for the record, you don't have to wonder if I want to on a date with you. I like you. A lot." Kris paused and reached out to take Adam's hand from where he had put it over his heart and held on to it. "You're sweet and funny and interesting and aggravating and insanely gorgeous. I want to see you as much as possible."

Adam blushed and bent his head to whisper, "Wow. Thank you. I feel the same about you."

"So that means we're dating?" Kris smiled up into Adam's happy face and then stood on tiptoe as Adam bent down for a soft kiss. 

"Oh hell, we can't get away from...." A loud male voice echoed through the gallery. 

Hearing a word that he wasn't going to accept hearing without responding, Adam straightened and looked around. Seeing the likely candidates in the two young men with baggy pants staring at them, he glared. "Oh, hell to the no," Adam said softly and took a step forward. 

"Adam..." Kris whispered. 

"Don't worry. They'll back off. They're little cowards who try to get away with crap only when they think they won't be called on it." 

Kris watched as Adam straightened himself out to full height, squared his shoulders and strode forward with some ground-eating stride that made him look even bigger and more imposing. He wasn't surprised when he switched his gaze back to the boys to see them licking their lips nervously and shuffling backwards. 

Then again, Kris thought, maybe they backed off due to the glare on Adam's face. Which he never ever wanted to see directed at him. Because wow, when that intensity was channeled into anger... Damn, he was hot. 

Their heads all swiveled around as they heard two women's voices coming down the hallway. 

"Did I hear, I could swear I heard Adam Lambert's voice--"

"You did not. You're ridiculous. We need to get this project done--"

"I'm serious. I could swear... Where are the boys, anyway?"

"In here and--"

"OHMYGAWD!" The young woman shrieked. "It's ADAM LAMBERT!"

"Shhh!" The guard following them into the gallery, hissed at them. "And walk. Do not run. Walk in the galleries!"

"Ohmigod!" The other young woman hissed as they approached. "It's you, it's really you. I cannot believe I bitched about coming here--"

"Yeah, which made all sorts of sense. You signed up for Art 101 -- did you not think we were going to have to come to an art museum?" 

"I thought it was a good way to meet nicer guys --"

"Which was a theory proven totally wrong given the two idiots we got assigned for this group project."

"I totally thought we'd left group projects behind in high school." 

"Oh, life is one group project after another," Kris quipped softly to himself as he edged behind Adam. He looked toward the boys who looked dejected as the two girls launched themselves at Adam. Ha. The gay guy got further with the girls than the boys who looked like they wanted them. "Karma's the name of a bitch who was best friend's with a gay guy," he muttered, then flushed as Adam laughed at his comment. He really had to work on that whole talking to himself aloud business. That's what happened when you spent too much time alone, he realized. 

"My name is Michaela and I love you!" The first young woman exclaimed as she reached them and threw her arms around Adam. 

Laughing, Adam hugged her back and then gently extricated himself. "Nice to meet you, Michaela. And your friend?" 

"I'm Katie. My mom took us to four of your concerts last year!" Katie hugged Adam, her face alight with delight.

"Totally. We're total Glamberts!" Michaela explained as she pulled Katie off of Adam. "Our moms too. My mom took us to two Glamnation tour dates -- back when you kissed Tommy during Fever. That was so hot."

"Oh, totally. _So_ hot!" Katie fanned her face. 

"Even my mom thought it was hot. My dad thinks it's weird that my mom thinks it's hot, though. But he doesn't get women, I'm pretty sure--" 

"Wait, Michaela, we're rude. We're interrupting him. He's here with a boy probably on a date--" 

"What about the boys you two were with?" Adam asked, seeing that they had disappeared.

"Oh, who cares?" Katie shrugged. "They're just in our art class at UCLA and as usual, we're doing all the work." 

"Is this your new boyfriend?" Michaela asked, nodding in Kris' direction.

Kris prayed for the floor to open up or even better, the paintings to open up like Night in the Museum. The original or sequel? Whatever, for now he'd just skulk behind Adam. Thank god he was small enough to do so!

"Why is he hiding?" Michaela whispered. 

"Is he shy?" Katie asked. "Oooh, that's sweet." 

"Ooooh, is he some celebrity?"

"Oooh, I bet he's some closeted celebrity!"

"I-- No... I..I'm nobody," Kris whispered and backed away.

"That's not true. You're somebody. We are all somebody," Adam said firmly.

"Okay..." Kris shuffled his feet nervously. He wanted to turn his back, but that would be rude, but if he faced forward and they took a picture...

"It's okay..." Adam slid his hand around the back of Kris' neck. He could see the conflict in Kris' face. "I have the best fans in the world and if I ask these two lovely ladies not to take a picture of you today, they won't."

"Oh, we won't!"

"Not if you don't want us to." 

"And besides, I think the guard would have a seizure..." Adam whispered. They all looked in his direction and laughed since the guard looked utterly bored. 

"So, you're dating Mr. Quiet here?" Michaela asked. 

"I didn't know there was room for me to speak," Kris quipped. 

Michaela giggled. "We do talk a lot, but right now... we're just really excited!"

Kris smiled at their excitement. They were just nice girls, that's all. "That's okay. I was really excited the _first_ time I met him too." 

"And now?" Adam asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Now?" Kris shrugged and pretended to yawn. "No big deal." 

"You'll recall I sued someone for defamation for trying to tell the world that I was no big deal," Adam said drily. 

The girls giggled. Katie shook her head. "He was a jerk, that dude. I mean, really, who does that shit?" 

"Yeah, you had a rough time, but that's okay..." Michaela patted Adam on the arm and whispered. "Everyone knows you have a big dick and.." She stopped when Kris began to laugh, then choked. She shrugged. "Boys are really jerky. It's hard to find a nice one."

"You make it sound like shopping for a new car," Kris noted with a smile. These girls reminded him of some of his old girl friends from back home... No. Not _home._ Back in Arkansas. Only these girls were supportive of the gay guy. Actually, they really were nice. 

Katie nodded. "He's cute, Adam. And he has that southern accent you like."

Adam smiled. "My fans know everything. I should have had a contest where my fans could play matchmaker for me."

"Oh! There's an idea!" Michaela agreed.

"That would've been so fun." Katie nodded vigorously. "And way hotter than that stupid Bachelorette show."

"Or Millionaire Matchmaker," Adam added. 

Michalea exclaimed, "Oh, I bet the fans could do way better than her in making you a match!" 

"You're not all gonna start singing the matchmaker song from _Fiddler on the Roof,_ are you?" Kris asked anxiously, looking at the guard. Who was still looking bored. He must see celebrities often enough to not care any more. 

"This isn't an episode of _Glee_." Adam grinned.

"And hey, you didn't need a contest or a matchmaker!" Katie noted with a smile in Kris' direction. "Looks like you found a boy all on your own."

"A real live boy, too!" Adam added.

The girls giggled. Kris smiled. "Is my name Pinnocchio?" 

"I don't know. Is it only your nose that grows?" Adam asked with a smirk. 

"Because that would be disappointing!" Michaela added with another giggle. 

 

"So, you seemed to do okay with your first fan interaction," Adam began as they walked out of the museum toward his car.

"Can I be honest?" Kris put his hand on Adam's arm.

"Please do." Adam sucked his upper lip inside and waited. He hadn't expected to meet fans at an art museum, but was glad he had. He needed to know -- If Kris couldn't handle meeting those girls, then he needed to know now. He looked down as Kris slid his hand through Adam's arm and held on, his fingers moving slowly along Adam's bare forearm as he obviously thought of his words.

"I was ready to run at first," Kris admitted. "The way they came at us was a little scary and I was nervous they were going to gossip about us. I hate gossip. _Hate_ it. But once I gave them a chance, well, they were just excited to meet you and once they got over their initial excitement which -- not to freak you out or anything -- I can understand, once they stopped shrieking, they didn't take our picture and they promised not to tweet the world about us. They were actually really nice." He squeezed Adam's arm. 

"Most people are." Adam stopped talking as he realized he needed to remember that too and slid his hand over Kris'. 

"You're right. I guess I'm ... I guess, due to shit in the past, I've gotten cautious. Maybe too cautious?" Kris mused aloud. Maybe timing was everything or maybe Adam had given him a reason, or more than one reason, to step out of the shadows he'd begun to find as dark as a prison.

"I think I'm in the same position..." Adam said slowly, looking over Kris head and out over the vista before him.

"Maybe..." Kris stood up straighter. Maybe this is what he had meant about... Oh hell. "Maybe... we can be good for each other that way? Remind each other about that truth?"

"Let's make a pact?" Adam asked, holding up his free hand and smiling when Kris immediately took it and squeezed. 

"Done." Kris smiled and slid his hand down Adam's forearm to hold his hand as they kept walking. Adam was quiet, which made him nervous since it happened so seldom. 

"Some night you have off, would you like to come to dinner at my house?" Adam asked abruptly, having come to a sudden decision. His instincts were telling him Kris was both nothing more than a great guy he'd met in a coffee shop and something much more... if he was willing to take a leap of trust. All of the most rewarding changes in his life had been due to a leap of faith, he reminded himself. 

"I...sure." Kris blinked at the suddenness of Adam's invitation. "What were you thinking before?"

"I was reminding myself you're a nice guy who probably isn't going to try to plant recording devices in my cupboards or my entertainment unit." 

"That happened to you?" Kris gaped, grappling with the idea of constantly worrying about how someone might use you. God, that would suck. No wonder Adam had trouble ditching his baggage -- it kept coming around on that airport carousel over and over and over.

"Yeah, at a party." Adam grinned. "He was a friend of a friend of a friend who was hoping to make a quick buck or some quick fame out of recording me doing something... I don't even know." He laughed. "I seem to do almost everything on stage, anyway -- so are there really any surprises left?"

"I'm hoping there are," Kris said drily. "But what did the taping catch?" 

Adam laughed. "Luckily all the guy caught was my friends and I playing Rock Band and sucking at it because we were all a little drunk." 

"You have Rock Band?" Kris asked eagerly. "How about Beatles Rock Band?"

"Yes, I have those games," Adam told him, smiling at Kris' excitement. 

"I've never played them--" Kris began, then looking around and seeing no one, threw his arms around Adam. "Then again, I'm hoping you weren't inviting me to your house _just_ to play with your video games." He wiggled closer, then shoved his hips forward. "Although I could totally get into playing with your joystick."


	7. Open the Door

**Chapter 7: Open the door**

**PG-13**

 

"Do you need help with that?"

"No. I've got it."

"Maybe you need to jiggle it," Adam suggested with a smirk.

"Mmm... mebbeee..." Kris grunted.

"Press harder?"

"I'm pressing plenty hard already! Do you want me to break it?"

"No, of course not! So... a more gentle touch?" 

"I think I know how to handle my own junk!"

"How about I try?"

Kris looked up at Adam and grinned. "You just wanta get your hands on my junk." 

Touching the key in Kris' hand, Adam grinned back. "I already know from feeling up your immensely awesome junk in that bathroom that's it bigger than that. But I'm hoping it's a lot less jaggedy-edged." He ran his tongue over his bottom lip, watching how Kris' eyes immediately snapped to his mouth. "Because that would hurt."

"Hmmm." Kris put his hands on Adam's shoulders and raised himself up to press a kiss on Adam's lips. 

The moment Kris' lips touched his, Adam felt that spark again and gave into the rush of need that pushed through his veins, pushing Kris back against the door as he bit Kris' lower lip. Kris gasped and Adam took advantage, sliding his tongue in and taking over, groaning when Kris opened his mouth and his legs and pulled Adam into him, undulating against him, meeting every thrust of hip and tongue with his own need. 

Hearing a sound in the stairwell, Adam forced himself to pull back, then seeing the wet swelling of Kris' lips, could not resist and dove back in, licking and sucking on Kris' lips, until the clompclompclomp of footsteps below them penetrated the thick haze of need that threatened to make him take Kris in the poorly lit hallway. He pulled back, gave one last kiss to Kris' warm mouth and smiled.

Kris opened his eyes and sighed happily. "And it would be a crime to hurt that mouth." 

"So are we going to get into your apartment or do I have to break the door down so I can kiss you in private?" Adam asked, running his fingers along the bare skin above the waistband of Kris' jeans. 

"I thought we were visiting my apartment so I could change shirts?" Kris teased. He loved talking to Adam, but right now all he wanted was more kisses. And more everything. Forget the glitter and the singing and the clothes, Adam -- just Adam --was hot. And... He leaned up again and gently kissed that mouth, then licked his own lips. Sweet too. 

"Kissing you without your shirt on would be even better. Open the door," Adam urged, pushing Kris to face the door again. So far, he'd been cautious and careful... well, except for nearly taking him in that bathroom...but that look of hunger and need on Kris' face was pressing his buttons. 

"My apartment is... not cool. It's embarassing actually," Kris hesitated as he pushed the key into the lock and jiggled it. Again. It was bad enough that waiter had spilled a pink drink all over him at the restaurant and they'd had to come to his skivy apartment for him to change before going out to a karaoke club and then there was the problem that he didn't really have club clothes to begin with and that shirt had been his nicest until he broke down and used that bit of money, but now this? He gritted his teeth and tried again. 

Watching Kris struggle with the lock, Adam nodded in remembrance. "Hey, you should have seen my first apartment in LA." He shuddered. 

"Was it bad?" Kris glanced up at Adam and seeing the sympathy in his eyes, knew Adam was trying to put him at ease. Unbelievable. Here was this big shot trying to make him comfortable about his disgusting apartment. How the hell had he lucked out like this? Oh yeah--

"My mom told me later that she cried all the way home after helping me move in there. Truth is..." Adam smiled as Kris finally opened the door and they walked in. He hadn't planned on coming here tonight or even being with Kris, but at the last minute Kris' coworker had wanted to switch days off. He was glad Kris had called him. 

"I'm sorry, but at least it's clean?" Kris asked, glad he'd taken the precaution of cleaning the apartment before every date. Small and poor was one thing, but messy and dirty was another. As his Gramma used to say, just because you're poor doesn't mean you have to be trash. "What was your apartment like?"

Adam hid another shudder -- this time of sympathy -- as he saw the near total emptiness of the tiny apartment. It might be the smallest apartment he'd ever seen; possibly it had been just one room of a larger apartment once. Good god, not even a bed or a couch or a dresser. Just an air mattress propped up against a wall, sleeping bag and pillow next to it and one chair that had probably been manufactured in the seventies by someone on drugs, and really bad drugs judging by the _damn_ ugly mottled orange mushrooms on it. "I might have shed a tear or two myself that night. It was in a bad part of the city, scary stuff..."

"How old were you?" Kris asked, touched at how Adam was showing that he too had hard times. Really, the guy was so sweet and then there was that whole hot as hell thing, why in the world had he been available? Why had he had such a bad time with guys before -- was it true that no good deed goes unpunished or what? 

"Nineteen." Adam touched Kris' hand. "I was excited -- certain I was going to take the world by storm. And I was much closer to my family than when I was on that cruise ship, but..."

"You're a mama's boy, aren't you?" Kris asked, smiling as he walked toward the closet and contemplated his tee-shirts, stacked on the top shelf of the world's smallest closet, which was no big deal given that he had so few clothes. Really, this should not be a huge decision. Black, white or blue. At least they were neatly stacked. He wasn't naturally neat, but he'd been hoping Adam might come back to his apartment tonight and wanted -- again -- to make a good impression. And ended up with some stupid pink drink all over him. He sighed. Best laid plans... He hoped that wasn't the story of his life. 

"Maybe." Adam grinned and pointed at the black tee as Kris seemed to be frozen with indecision. "It's not like the first thing I did after Idol and signing my contract was talk my mother into quittting her job and moving to LA and buy her a condo or anything."

"You did that?" Kris smiled, then pulled his dirty shirt over his head. Nervous about Adam seeing him half-undressed, he looked down and rubbed his thumb over the stain in his shirt. How was he supposed to get that out? "You see her all the time?"

"Well, not _all_ the time, but... a lot, yeah." Adam smiled and took the dirty shirt from Kris and handed the black tee to him. Glancing at the sparse closet, Adam realized Kris couldn't afford to just toss the shirt. When you didn't have many clothes, you had to take care of them. And if he didn't do something with his hands, he was going to start stroking that smooth skin of Kris' and... not yet. Not yet... he felt like there was something hidden, some truth... Like why Kris was out here with no family and never spoke of his family or something... Oh hell, he was overthinking it again.

"Adam?" Kris asked as he shoved his head through the neck of his shirt and caught Adam staring at him. Oh. _Oh._ Now that Adam was looking at him like he wanted to, oh hell yeah, lick him all over, all he could think was that he didn't want to have it happen here in this horrible apartment. 

"You need to run this in cold water so the stain doesn't set," he told Kris as he walked over to the faucet and did just that, then picked up the small plastic bottle of dish detergent and squirted it, while looking over at Kris who was fidgeting with the hem of the shirt he'd pulled on --damn it. So maybe talking about his mom would ease his anxiety.

"How do you know that?" Kris asked, moving his foot to hide the hole in the linoleum on the floor, the linoleum that had undoubtedly been some color at some point, but was now just...grey. Well, hell, his whole apartment was grey or had been, except for the world's ugliest orange mushroom chair, but now... It felt like his apartment was full of color. He smiled as he watched Adam fuss with his shirt and talk. Seriously, Adam talked more than anyone he'd ever met. Good thing Kris loved to listen to him or... He moved his foot more fully over the hole and looked up. "Your mom?"

"Yes, I know that from my mom. We're more equals now, more friends. But there's no one like a mom -- or a dad -- for telling you when to stop being a stupid idiot or telling you that it's okay to be sad or telling you that it will be alright when everything is going wrong." Adam laid the shirt against the sink and walked back into the so-called living area. "Should be good." 

"Thanks." Kris shook his head, followed Adam and leaned against the back of the tiny counter. "I can't believe Adam Fucking Lambert just did my laundry." Somehow he doubted Adam Lambert did his _own_ laundry. 

"No biggie. How about you?" Adam asked carefully, seeing the wistful look on Kris' face and fearing he already knew the answer. He took Kris' hand and curled his fingers around it and stepped close. "Did your mom cry when she moved you in here?"

"My mom..." Kris flinched. He tried to pull back from Adam, then surrendered when Adam held on tightly. His eyes widened at the strength in Adam's grasp and he raised surprised eyes to Adam's. 

"It's okay, Kris. It's okay.. Come here..." Adam whispered, rubbing his cheek against Kris' hair, feeling the shivers running through Kris' entire body. He pulled back and gently kissed Kris' lips, feeling the trembling against his mouth. Poor guy, he looked like he might collapse if he didn't get it out. "It's okay."

Seeing the compassion in Adam's eyes and feeling the warmth and concern that just...well, radiated from him, suddenly, the words burst out of Kris. "She... she didn't move me in here. Unless you count watching my dad throw my stuff on the front lawn and telling me I wasn't welcome until I found Jesus again and stopped going down the road to hell with other boys. Only he didn't use the word boys, he used--"

"Don't verbalize the hate, it just cuts the wound back open. Oh crap, Kris. I'm sorry..." Adam whispered and saw Kris' face crumple. Watching Kris look away as he fought for composure, Adam instinctively reached out instantly and enfolded Kris in his arms. "So sorry..."

"They were my parents... I thought parents loved their kids no matter what, but I was wrong..." Kris stopped to take a breath and suddenly he couldn't catch his breath because gasping sobs were spilling from his mouth like that pink drink over his shirt earlier tonight. Oh god, he was losing it. 

This was why he'd never told anyone before. Probably why he had closed himself off from making friends out here too -- afraid of sharing the story and being a wuss, as his father would say. Now feeling the strength of Adam's arms around him, the warmth of his big hands on his back, and the rumble of soft words, Kris felt... safe. For the first time in so long, he felt safe. He bit back a sob and heard the hiccup in his voice as he muttered into Adam's chest, "God... making... fool..." 

"No, you're not. It's okay." Adam tightened his arms when he felt Kris draw a deep breath then seem to collapse aginst him. "Shhh, shhhh...." Adam crooned, then sank to the floor, leaning against the wall, before pulling Kris into his lap. 

"You're on the floor..." Kris moaned, even as he moved to straddle Adam's lap to get closer. He held onto him, his hands clenching onto the front of Adam's shirt.

"Better than that chair. It would give us both nightmares." Adam kissed this side of Kris' head and curled his arms around the broken man on his lap. 

Kris let out a watery half-formed chuckle, then began to cry again. "I... I'm sorry, sorry.. to carry on like this. Sorry. It's just no one..." Kris burrowed into Adam's embrace. No one had ever made him feel safe like this. 

"It's okay," Adam crooned in a soft low voice, rubbing Kris' back, feeling his smaller frame shake from the explosion of emotion. 

"I didn't understand. I don't. We were so close..."

"You were a mama's boy too?"

"That's how I recognized it in you," Kris smiled through his tears.

"I can't imagine how much it would hurt to have my mother turn her back on me," Adam said softly, a thought he'd expressed more than once to others telling the same damn story. He thanked the universe once again for giving him the parents he had and vowed to call them both tomorrow. 

"It hurt more than anything. Ever. Ever." Kris sniffled and reached into his pocket. Yes, thank god, he had stolen some TP from the restaurant. He wiped his nose and looking down at his jeans, whispered, his voice rough, "They were always supportive of me and my desire to go into music, ya know? Or my mom was. My dad was impatient and told me that if I didn't make it -- whatever _it_ was -- in a year or two, I had to man up and get a real job like a real man."

"Real job? Like _what_? Digging ditches?" Adam spat. " _Real_ man? What the _hell_ does that mean?"

Kris felt a reluctant smile curve his lips at the indignation in Adam's voice. Indignation on his behalf. No one in what he thought of as his old life had been indignant, they all seemed to think his father was right, they'd all turned their backs on him. He still remembered the day he'd stopped checking his voice mail. 

And here was Adam Fucking Lambert, stroking his hair and getting angry on his behalf? Everyone was right -- underneath that glitter, Adam Lambert was a good guy. Realizing that he'd been staring into Adam's eyes for too long, Kris ducked his head and answered, "That would have been better. Than anything I ever did once I got out of high school. Start with, well, I dropped out of college..."

"Me, too." Adam rubbed his chin against Kris' hair and added, "We could sing 'Beauty School Drop Out' from _Grease_ together some time."

Kris smiled. That's right, Adam had done _Grease_ after he got out of high school. Thank god for the way E! constantly replayed True Hollywood Stories. "College... It wasn't for me. I was a decent student, but I was just so ... restless."

"It wasn't the right place?" Adam asked.

Kris nodded and laid his head back down on Adam's shoulder, sighing when Adam held him tightly again. This place felt right, here in Adam's arms. He sighed again, knowing, needing to continue the story. "Anyway, I had no degree, no real marketable skills, unless you count being a Chik-Fil-A connoisseur."

"What's Chikfila?"

"See, that's why there is no career in that." Kris sniffled again. "According to my father, there is no career in music either."

Adam pressed his lips together. "To be honest, that's often true. But not always. More importantly, everyone should pursue their dreams if only so that they don't have regrets later on, don't you think? Regrets are a bitch." 

Kris bit his lip hard and then shook his head. "Well, he made me mad. Which was good, because I admit it now, I needed a fire under my butt."

When Kris said nothing more, Adam observed, "You're laid back by nature, aren't you?"

"Yeah... But then, maybe I was just lazy. Maybe I didn't want it enough. I dunno." Kris nodded and tilted his head back to look at Adam's face. No judgment there, just warmth and attentiveness. Adam was easy to talk to; the words just kept spilling out his mouth. 

"Anywaaaay..." Kris started again. "So his attitude gave me some motivation and I went out and hustled. In six months, I had three jobs. One singing at a bar on Friday nights, one at a coffee house on Thursday nights -- and I was a bartender and barista other nights. Then, I was the house singer at a local pre-school who had this director who used to be a music teacher, so they had a lot of music there. I taught guitar to the little kids, but I was their in-house singer."

"Hey, that's pretty good!" Adam exclaimed, honestly impressed and wondering why Kris had not sung for him before. Then again, he hadn't asked and he knew why -- he didn't want to make the mistake of mixing the business of music with his personal life ever again, given his last so-called boyfriend. "You were working. Any musician who can actually book regular gigs is doing damn well."

"I thought so too!" Kris sighed. If Adam Fucking Lambert thought he'd been doing well, then he'd been doing well. Regardless of what his father had said. If only he'd known Adam back then. "Okay, I wasn't setting the world on fire, but I had work, you know? People liked my music."

"That's more success than most musicians have."

"I know, right? And I liked the bar, and the coffee house, and the kids. Really liked the kids -- that was a great job, really."

"How so?" Adam touched Kris' cheek, noting how animated Kris was when he talked about his music jobs. 

"It...was rewarding. Made me happy, 'cause the kids are so open to music and to expressing themselves and respond to others express themselves. I was content, happy even, with my music."

"Then that's what was right for _you_. Each of us has to find our own spot. We all don't have the same dreams or goals. Nor should we. Don't you think?"

"Right?" Kris nodded. "I mean, yeah, I would've liked to have made more money...Is that shallow?"

"You're talking to a guy wearing boots that cost more than I used to make in a week doing Wicked. So... money's good." Adam rubbed Kris' back. "Plus, I've been poor and poor sucks. There is nothing noble about being poor. If not for my parents..."

"Would you have given up?" Kris asked curiously.

"I'm _really_ stubborn. And according to my brother, the world's most bossy human being." Adam smiled. "The more someone tells me I can't do something, the more determined I am to do it. And vice versa. But we weren't talking about me. Do you want to tell me what happened that led you out here?" 

Kris took a deep, shuddering breath, then said in a rush, "This dude saw me go into a gay bar in Little Rock." 

When Kris took a loud gasping breath and then fell silent, Adam waited for a long moment and then asked softly, "That sounds like the start of a joke, but it isn't, is it?"

"Nooooo....." Kris whispered. "It was the start of... the end."


	8. Showing the cracks

**Chapter 8: Showing the cracks  
Rating: PG**

"The start of what?" Adam prompted. 

"I went into this gay bar in Little Rock," Kris began again. He took another deep breath. 

Realizing that Kris needed help getting started, Adam asked, "There are gay bars in Little Rock?"

"Yeah. Not very glamorous gay bars, not like LA, but... they uh serve their purpose." 

When Kris blushed and fiddled with the hem of Adam's shirt, Adam smiled and urged, "I get the drift. Caught that wave myself. Go on." 

Kris nodded, then unconsciously slid his hands up under it, needing to touch skin. Oh yeah... warm. He leaned his forehead onto Adam's shoulder and whispered, the words coming out in a rush of sound. 

"I went into this gay bar to meet a guy I'd hooked up with on the internet because you know I wasn't out so I didn't have a relationship, but I still wanted you know. And we came out right away because it wasn't like we were there to dance, you know. So we came out of this gay bar with my uh date for the night on our way to his apartment and and and and..."

Taking a loud breath, wondering if Adam could hear him over the sound of his heart beating so loud in remembrance that he would swear his ear drums were vibrating, Kris forced himself to continue. "I literally walked right into a guy I know who was walking to another bar on the street. He'd seen me go in and couldn't believe it, so he hung around, thinking he was going to make a joke that I'd screwed up and gone into the wrong bar. But when I came out with a guy, he realized it wasn't a joke. He's from my hometown, small town, you know? That dude, he looked up and saw the bar, looked at the other guy and... figured it out. He started yelling at me... bad stuff. He apparently got on his phone and called his cousin whose sister's husband's sister was on the board of the pre-school. And, and, and--"

"You've gotta be kidding," Adam interjected, if only to get Kris to slow down. He was talking so fast, so softly, mumbling, tears running down his face while gasping for air, his breath loud and raspy and wet. Adam was afraid Kris was going to pass out. 

"No. And so and so and so---" Kris looked down when Adam touched his cheek. Only then did he realize that his cheek was wet with tears and that he was out of breath. 

"It's okay. We have all the time in the world. Take a breath, Kris. Take a breath..." Adam crooned and gently pressed Kris down against him.

"Okay." Kris rested his forehead against Adam's shoulder and focused on breathing in and out. Finally lifting his head, he tried again. "So..so... they called me in and I sat down and... the looks on their faces... Like I was something... less. Like they smelled something rotten. Like I was garbage. These were people I'd known my whole life! who knew me. I'd played with their kids, was friend with their kids or brothers. And they they..." Kris bit his lip and looked up, hoping the tears would stop falling. As Adam's finger gently wiped away the tears, Kris relaxed his body and looked up into Adam's eyes and found the strength to continue. "First they tried to witness to me, tell me how I was going to hell, but if I renounced my evil ways, they could -- in all Christian _goodness_ \-- forgive me my sin. _My_ sin? When I knew them -- none of them are... Oh, that's not even the point, is it? None of us are perfect - that's the point. But then..." 

"What did you say?" 

"I... not much. I was in shock, I think. Later I thought of all sorts of things I shoulda said, but then..." Kris frowned. "I just sat there, waiting. I knew what was gonna happen... they fired me. They didn't want my kind around their kids. They told me that because they were good Christians they wouldn't tell the parents why I was being let go, but in good conscience they wouldn't lie if someone asked them. Which meant that I was going to be screwed over because everyone would know and..." Kris ran out of words. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and inhaled the scent that was Adam, kissed his neck, and once again wiggled closer. 

"So that's how your parents found out?" Adam stroked Kris' back and sighed himself. His heart hurt for Kris, but he hoped Kris was taking as much comfort from being in his arms as he was enjoying holding him. Kris felt damn good in his arms.... he felt right and... okay, maybe he did enjoy being taking care of others too much, but he felt privileged that Kris was telling him this obviously difficult tale. . Maybe... He tightened his grip for a moment, then felt warmth inside when Kris seemed to fall more fully against him.

"I told them first. You know..." Kris shook his head ruefully as he moved deeper under Adam's arm. "On the way home, I was... relieved, you know? I was angry and upset and a little bit afraid, but part of me was glad this game of hide and seek was over. The attempts to fix me up with nice girls would be over. I thought my parents would be mad about losing the job, but I honest to god thought they'd come around about me being gay. I thought... I mean, you hear about parents who have issues, but then when it's _their_ kid, it's different, right? And my parents loved me, I mean my father gave me crap over work, but I knew or... _thought_ I knew that love trumped everything."

"It should..." Adam said softly, feeling the trembling in Kris' body and shifting his legs so that Kris fell more fully against him. He wondered if Kris' original belief that his parents would accept him had been wishful thinking and willful denial of reality. Kris had kept his sexuality a secret well into adulthood. Had it been so much harder to be open in Arkansas, had Kris known deep down that his parents and friends would not accept him and avoided instigating it?

Kris paused and drew in a shallow shaky breath, then as Adam's hand slowly rubbed his back, took in a deeper draught of air. "Okay. I thought or I hoped they'd be more mad over the hypocrisy of these good Christians treating me like crap than over me getting caught. I mean, I thought they might be mad about me being gay, but I thought they'd... get over it, I guess. Especially my mom. But instead, I...I...I... when I told them, they just screamed at me. They had a fit and I mean, I've never seen my father act like that... I didn't even know him. And the words that came out of his mouth..."

"That must've been scary."

"It was. It was like my family had become strangers. Strangers who....who...who hated me!" Kris heard his voice get higher and warbly and clamped his mouth shut. 

"It's okay. Just get it out. Tell the story. Get it out," Adam urged. Holding it in like this for so long could not be a good idea, letting those bad memories and bad thoughts brew in their own juices inside his head and heart. "Get it out and then you can start to let it go."

Seeing the conviction in his own words in Adam's eyes, Kris decided to trust Adam's judgment. And after all, it wasn't like holding it in had made him feel better, so why not? He had nothing to lose and the last time he'd realized that.... He held onto Adam's arms and whispered, "They threw my stuff out on the lawn and told me to leave and never come back or not until I'd thrown the devil out of me. And my father actually said, he said..." Kris paused as he struggled for breath, hearing the loud rasping of his own breath, wet in his tight throat. He nodded mutely when Adam rubbed his back and pulled him into the warm circle of his arms and laid against Adam's' chest for long moments. Eventually, he began again, "He said it was good I wasn't going to be around children any more because I was a pervert who could....who would...." He could not speak the words even if he wanted, his tears choking him. 

Forcing his lips to speak carefully and not say what he was really thinking since one of them needed to be calm, Adam said, "I get it. If saying that hurts too much, you don't have to repeat it. Unless you need to." What he needed to do was punch Kris' father in the face. Repeatedly. 

"Okay..." Kris took another deep breath, then tilted his head back to look into Adam's eyes. "I couldn't believe it. I just stood there and stared and they slammed the door. I stood there for hours, waiting... hearing those words..." 

Kris bit his lip as he remembered standing there in the front lawn, the sky growing dark, seeing no movement inside the house, feeling his muscles grown thick and tight, as thick and tight as his throat as the night insects buzzed around him, as his feet started to hurt and then finally, the greatest hurt of all, the one deep inside as the door stayed closed and the lights went off in the house. No open door, no calling of his name, not even a good bye from his mama. Nothing but the buzzing that he eventually realized was in his own ears, the sound of the silence that wasn't quiet, that was filled with the remembered sound of the hate coming out of his own father's mouth. 

Shuddering at the memory, hearing the words ringing in his ear, Kris realized that Adam was crooning to him, singing softly, his voice sweet and rough at the same time. And something in him opened up and felt whole again. He sighed, burrowed into Adam's embrace, then sighed again and kissed Adam's cheek. "Thank you."

"Don't revisit the specific words that hurt," Adam advised, relieved that Kris had returned from the dark memory he'd been visiting, every pain moving across his face as the recollection passed through his mind. "You give them too much continued power that way. Find a dream or a fantasy or a good memory to replace them." 

Nodding, Kris rested his head on Adam's shoulder and took a deep breath, then another. Adam always smelled good and he had a feeling he'd always associate his scent not only with heat and desire but, now, with comfort too. He laid against Adam's solidity for a long time, listening to their breathing. Adam's soft kisses against his hair finally penetrated the miasma of exhaustion and fear. Adam... He wasn't turning away from him. He was holding him and... Kris buried his face against the heat of Adam's neck and kissed, then lightly on the skin, wanting, needing to be closer, closer...

Stroking Kris from the top of his head, all the way down his back and up again, Adam asked, "So did you have a dream when you came out here -- or did you just run as far as you can and the ocean stopped you once you got here?"

"Go west, young man?" Kris hummed under his breath in time with the movements of Adam's hands. "I just drove at first, then I decided that I'd come out here and show them, you know? I came out here and I pounded the pavement -- me and my guitar. Trying to get a deal, trying to get work. All I got was a job in a bar. Tending bar, not even singing at it. I keep trying, but day-umm. It--"

"Sucks?" Adam nodded. "That's why I went on Idol. I wanted to make music. And I wanted to make some money at it too."

"We all gotta make a living, so why not make money doing what you love?" Kris nodded. "I don't see anything wrong with wanting to make money at it. The starving artist route is romantic only as long as it's not you starving. I want a..." Kris trailed off. If he told Adam about his food cravings, he'd get the world's largest delivery from Whole Foods the next day. 

"What did you want most?" Adam asked. "What's been your motivation?" 

"Me? You know, being totally honest, I think what I wanted most of all was to become the next big thing so that they could see me and regret... God, thats stupid." And probably one of the reasons he'd been ready to give up. 

"No, that sounds real. I think most of the people in the entertainment business have more than one moment of envisioning themselves in front an audience of millions at an awards ceremony, singing, 'If They Could See Me Now'." Adam paused. Sensing Kris felt that he was done with exhausting himself, Adam smiled and noted, "I'd do it wearing diamonds." 

Kris laughed. "Hmm. How about a cane?"

"Totally. A sparkly one too." 

"Is there anything you wouldn't add sparkles to?"

"I wouldn't Bedazzle my dick." 

Kris blinked and broke into loud laughter, the anxiety and emotion of his story nearly dissipating in a welcome burst of amusement. Adam had the best timing. 

"I haven't laughed this much in, like, forever. I haven't..." He stopped to corral his thoughts, his emotions whirling inside him. Feeling Adam's heart beat against his cheek in a hard _thudthudthud_ , he grasped the most important one. "I haven't felt in a long time. I think I was afraid to feel because I was afraid to let all that emotion out, that I'd fall apart and... that was bad, you know?"

"Why? Sometimes isn't falling apart what you need to do in order to put it back together?"

"I thought it was weak... girly."

"That's not only a sexist way of thinking, it's untrue. In my experience, women are often tougher than men."

"Maybe, but..." Kris stopped and shook his head. Adam was right.

"Why are you using the language and values of the people who rejected you to define you? Isn't that perpetually self-destructive?" 

"I...wow. I never...That's something to think about." Kris smiled abruptly. Wanting to be finished talking about himself, he asked, "But.... do you do that? Or do you hear the nasty crap people said to you in high school in your head when you look in the mirror sometimes?"

" _Bingo._ I talk a better game than I play," Adam admitted. "I think that's why the crap with my boyfriend-who-wasn't and the asshole who sold that picture...." He looked down at Kris' hand on his chest. Was that just to touch him or was it an unconscious need for Adam to stop questioning for the moment? He nodded and continued with his story, deciding Kris needed time to get control. "My friend, Alisan, who's been in show business forever - she keeps telling me that everyone can get played and not to take it personally. But those old insecurities and the way I'm such a control freak..."

"Well, but that _was_ horrible," Kris said softly. Thank god he wasn't talking about himself for a moment. And it was always good to remember that almost everyone had their own pain, not just yourself. "I felt so bad for you." 

"I felt bad for me," Adam shuddered as he remembered the horror of getting a call from the pr rep at the label, Jacob the Jerk, informing him that an unflattering naked picture of him was making the rounds. "Bad year for me when it came to partners. First, my boyfriend turns out to just be another guy on the make for a deal and using me to leap hurdles..." Adam paused. That hurt had been like an open wound for so long and now, poking at it carefully, he found it didn't have that sharp pain of fire any more. It had dulled. And he was tired of thinking about or as his mom said, overanalyzing it. It was time to focus on the positive. "I'm done with it now. Mostly anyway. You can call me on it if I do what my mother -- _exaggerating_ , I'm sure -- called wallowing." 

"I'm glad." Kris smiled up into Adam's face, glad the intense stare Adam had been directing at him had changed quickly from sad to warm and contented. 

Unthinkingly Adam pulled Kris closer to him and smiled. He had met a really cute guy, a really nice guy, who seemed to like him and need him just for him, not for what he could do for him. "Well, you probably read about it or saw it on Access Hollywood, so I don't need to give the post-mortem." 

"He was an idiot," Kris said fervently, also remembering those gossip stories. "And so was that Billy Bush, the way he..."

"Salivated over the news that I'd been used?" Adam frowned. "That guy has short man syndrome."

"I don't."

"I can tell." Adam wiggled his eyebrows. "Which probably means you don't have any inadequacy issues." 

Kris laughed softly, then said honestly, "Naw. I think my inadequacies stem from being rejected by everyone I loved." 

"That's enough to do it." Adam kissed Kris' hair. Taking the chance that Kris had been distracted enough to gain control again, he then asked quietly, "Did everyone really reject you or did you just pull back under the assumption--"

"I _know_ they all rejected me!" Kris exclaimed, then bit his lip. "I... " Clenching his hands tightly around Adam's arms, Kris pondered Adam's advice about replacing bad memories with good thoughts. Positive thinking. Hmm. He slid his hands up and down Adam's arms as they still encircled him. Kris thought he'd replace those memories with this moment -- when someone had cared enough to hold him through a storm. "I thought my parents, they'd call me in or...later, call me."

"But they still haven't?" Adam asked softly, realizing this was the core of the sadness he'd sensed in Kris. 

"No. I... guess I thought, I hoped they'd come after me. Or after a while, contact me, but..." Kris drew in a deep breath. "I never changed my phone number. I..."

"They still may."

Hearing the "may" for the warning it was, Kris asked, "Do you really think..."

"I.." Adam took a deep breath. "When you stood there, waiting... Was it a total shock or was it the shock of your worst nightmare coming true?" 

"Wow, there's a question..." Kris whispered. 

"Or... ask yourself this. Did you keep your sexuality a secret because it can be so hard to be quote unquote different or did you keep it because you're a non-confrontational person and you knew revealing the truth would lead to a nasty fight resulting in rejection? Or both?"

"Either way, that doesn't say much about my courage!" Kris gulped. Maybe that had been the real test of his manhood, the decision to avoid the truth and its consequences. Maybe his father was right, for all the wrong reasons....

"And maybe... you've grown up and changed since you were on your own too, Kris," Adam warned, giving Kris a hard squeeze as he heard the mumblings under Kris' breath as he stared at Adam unseeingly. "Maybe you need to forgive yourself for mistakes you made in the past." 

"Is this where you give me the lecture about learning only from your mistakes?"

"No. That's idiotic because it implies that only negative reinforcement works. You can learn from your successes too." 

Kris smiled. "The way you lecture tells me that someday you're gonna be a great parent."

"Ew. I'm not your parent!" Adam shuddered. "Good god, I was lecturing? I'm sorry." 

"Not into that whole "daddy" subculture?" Kris asked.

"No. I'm just bossy, not paternalistic." 

Kris nodded. "My parents, then. Do you think...How long should I wait?" He poked Adam. "How long would you wait?"

"I think you can always have hope..." Adam said carefully, not wanting to give Kris false hope that his parents would come around. Sadly, it didn't always happen, which was how, in part, he'd created this new family in LA, full of people needing a new family. 

"I hear a big ol' but in your voice." 

"Hope is important. But you can't change other people, so this particular wish doesn't need to be one you revisit regularly. More like... something you keep in a treasure chest you open only every so often. Whereas, with hopes and dreams that you can control -- those you should keep at the forefront so you work to make them come true." He stopped and grimaced. "Listen to me. I sound like some old hermit man on the mountain. I'm about as wise as I am a hermit. As in, not at all. I apologize." 

"Oh, I don't know. I think you have the wisdom that comes from experience. After all, if you're older, you should be wiser, right?" Kris teased.

Adam stuck out his tongue. "And... since I'm older, I'll always be wiser."

"You'd like to think that. It may be a delusion caused by getting senile with old age." Kris laughed as Adam bounced his legs and Kris nearly fell off of Adam's lap. He grabbed Adam's arms and righted himself, then smoothed Adam's shirt, hoping his tears and clutching grip had not ruined it. "But thanks. I... guess I needed to let that..." He waved his hand abstractly though the air. "I needed to let the crap go. I feel better. A lot better now. Lighter. I guess I needed to say it. Thanks for listening to me and..." Kris looked up and smiled shyly. "And holding me. I...needed that too." 

"You're nice to hold." Adam smiled and pulled Kris in for a hug, smiling again when Kris kissed his cheek. He liked... okay, if he were honest, he loved how affectionate Kris was. And he needed to think about the advice he'd given Kris and why he didn't always take it himself. "Do you want to go to the bathroom and wash your face?" Adam asked. 

"I swear I am the worst date ever!" Kris shook his head, but feeling Adam's hands still roving up and down his back, he felt no need to move from his position on Adam's lap.

"Believe me, I've had way worse!" Adam laughed. "You haven't vomited on me."

"Gross!" Kris elbowed Adam and confided, "That happened to me too."

"In public?"

"Ah, you win. You topped me!"

"Not yet." Adam smirked. Unbelievable that Kris hadn't gotten up to immediately fix his face. Not that he had to, he looked fine, just a little worn and tear-stained. Like a real guy who'd had a hard time and wasn't afraid to show it. Amazing. 

Kris wiggled around on Adam's lap. "Maybe later? Would that improve my date rating?"

"When we sat down on the floor, you immediately straddled my hips And now you're proving to be a talented wiggler. Your rating is already going _up_." Adam shifted his hips.

"Damn!" Kris gasped out as he felt a bulge under his ass. "That picture was a lie. I'll testify in court." 

"See? Not the worst date ever. You've complimented my dick -- sight unseen. And more important, you haven't taken an unflattering pic of it yet."

Kris burst into laughter. "It does feel as though you're ready for your close up." 

"Mr. DeMille?" Adam smiled. "Come here, get close to me..." He urged, sliding his hand up Kris' back until he could curl it around his neck and press forward, smiling when Kris responded to his touch by eagerly meeting his lips. 

Feeling his own pulse pound against Adam's palm, Kris gave into the strength that seemed to surround him and surrendered to the heat that seemed to flow into and around him from Adam's mouth and arms and body. 

"You taste like tears," Adam whispered, unsure if a minute or an hour had passed.

"I'd rather taste like you. Come back here," Kris whispered back, tilting his head up for another kiss. When he was with Adam he felt... alive again.

Adam moaned softly as he slowly pulled back to stare into Kris' eyes. He was so... open. "You're beautiful..." he whispered.

Kris gaped at him. Adam must've drunk too much at the restaurant or something. "You're the one who's beautiful. Me? I _should_ wash my face..." Kris said as he reluctantly stood up and held his hand out for Adam. 

"Sure. The bathroom's apparently that way," Adam teased as he vaulted to his feet and Kris did not move. 

"Do you still wanna go out to a club?" Kris asked, ducking his head and playing nervously with a button on Adam's shirt. He wouldn't blame Adam for ducking out and never calling him again. God, he'd blown it, no doubt and he'd hate himself--

"If you want to," Adam offered.

"I look a mess--"

"I could put make up on you." 

Kris shook his head at Adam's teasing. "I think it looks hot on you, especially when you do the shiny stuff on your eyelids. But on me?" He shook his head again. "I'd look like a boy playing dress up." 

"No, you wouldn't and besides, dress up is fun!" Adam argued, smiling at the fact that Kris liked his make up. 

Reaching out impulsively, Kris hugged Adam to him in a tight grip. "Being with you is so much fun. So whatever you want to do. I'm easy."

"I'm going to be very glad about that another night. But no club tonight. We can go another time. There's always a dj and a dance floor." Adam grinned and slapped Kris on the butt. "Now go wash up and change of plans. Let's go to a quiet club, listen to some music and have a drink or two." 

"And some dessert? Cake is good. I like cake!" Kris said, suddenly ravenous. 

"Oh, now, this _is_ a great date. You're actually asking me to feed you."

"That's not all I'd like you to feed me..." Kris said, reaching back to cup Adam's cock through his tight jeans. 

"You..." Adam once again was unable to resist the urge to enfold Kris in his arms. "The way you go from a kid wanting cake to a guy wanting cock..." He laughed. "God, I have a good time with you."

"Really?" Kris asked, frowning when he heard his voice squeak. After tonight's mess, Adam thought he was a good time? He took a deep breath, thanked god for big favors and looked up at Adam. "Tonight. Thanks. For everything tonight." 

"Thank you," Adam whispered back. He brushed his hand against the side of Kris' face and tilted his head back to look into his eyes. If Kris was anything other than completely honest, then he should go into acting rather than singing, because everything in his face seemed true. 

"For what?" Kris asked, perplexed.

"For being real." 

"I... don't know any other way to be..." Kris said slowly.

"I know. That's what's so amazing."


	9. Your cracks are showing. Amongst other things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flackback

**Chapter 9: Your cracks are showing. Amongst other things.  
Rating: R**

 

"How's your omelette?" Adam asked, raising his coffee cup to his lips. This early in the morning wouldn't be his choice for a date, but he had free time this morning. It was just two days after Kris had fallen apart in his arms and he thought it was a good idea that they saw each other soon so Kris didn't have a time to regret being so vulnerable. Plus, an early morning date meant breakfast, which meant he could buy Kris a meal. "Eggs are good for you." 

Slanting a glare at Adam, then at his Adam's bowl of fruit which -- despite their undoubted benefit... Kris grinned as he recalled earlier this morning. The fruit was not enough calories for a man Adam's size. "Great. But you don't have to keep feeding me."

Adam shrugged. "I come from a long line of Jews who feel their goal in life is to feed the people around them." 

"And yet you can't cook a thing."

"Ironic, isn't it?" Adam asked easily. 

"You're not going to stop feeding me, are you?" Kris asked resignedly. Adam knew he was hungry and could afford to feed him. Adam was bossy. Adam was going to feed him. He could accept graciously or be a dick. Plus Adam was only being bossy because he gave a crap -- and he had, well, basically, no one in his life who gave a crap about him, so he'd be worse than a prick to refuse to eat, he'd be stupid as well. Well, his mama had raised him right. He wasn't an asshole or stupid. He smiled slightly at Adam and raised his cup of tea in Adam's direction. End of story. 

"No." Adam smiled. The emotions flying across Kris' face had been illuminating to see. Embarrassment, reluctance, anxiety, then acceptance and finally, gratitude. Thank god, the boy was so easy to read. "I'm going to keep feeding you just like I did earlier this morning."

"Oh!" Kris felt heat redden his face. "Okay. Fine. But it's only fair if you have a bite of my sausage!" Kris held out the fork, then watched Adam's face crumple up with laughter. He shoved the fork at him, nodding as Adam took the sausage. 

"I like your sausage." 

"It's not as meaty as---" Kris looked from Adam's mouth to his eyes. 

Their eyes met and they both cracked up.

__

_Smiling eagerly as he took the stairs to Kris' apartment two at a time, Adam thanked whatever gods watched over LA traffic that somehow he had gotten here in record time. Less time in traffic getting to Kris meant more time with him._

_"Hurry up!" Kris pled with the apartment building's water heater, which he was sure was in cahoots with the devil or something. He'd overslept and while he could probably use a blast of cold water to wake him up, he wanted that one little luxury of hot water. Was that too much to ask? Hot water. Maybe... he should move, maybe he should... Move into the shower because Adam was on his way over to pick him up for a breakfast date and he didn't want him to have any second thoughts or third thoughts given the way he'd broken down the other night. No matter what Adam said, that had not been a manly thing to do._

_After the other night when Kris had broken down, Adam was sure his instincts were right and that Kris was the real deal. Even if Lane hadn't yet gone to Arkansas, Adam was allowing his instincts and his heart to rule his head. At least for now and now, he wanted to maximize their time together. Especially given that Kris had said he'd overslept and was running late for their breakfast date. He wasn't sure though about Kris' intention to leave a key for Adam over the doorsill of his apartment while Kris ran out for coffee. He'd argued to no avail, but surely, he wouldn't leave the key out, not in this neighborhood... Adam sucked in a breath as he reached Kris' door, saw the key -- ohmigod, boy, this wasn't Arkansas! He grabbed the key and used it, pushing the door open._

_Coating his fingers with soap, Kris spread his legs and reached between them, gently shoving his fingers inside, then stroking his cock with hard fast slides, hurrying to come before his date with Adam. He had to take that edge off or he was going to embarrass himself by coming in his pants the next time Adam kissed him. Thank god the traffic in LA was always horrendous, so he had just enough time... One day, when they were stuck in traffic, he was going to just bend over and suck Adam off, he'd had enough of seeing that bulge so close... "Oh_ yeah _..." He groaned loudly._

_He was really going to yell at Kris for being so careless with safety, Adam decided as he closed and locked the door behind him. This neighborhood sucked. Then again, he really shouldn't yell at Kris. Kris was a grown man. And he had promised himself he would stop being so bossy. Then again, he was right. This was not the best neighborhood and leaving your door basically unlocked was a bad idea. Screw not being bossy. Actually, he really should've just been dominating -- screw bossy and go right for dominating, because seriously?_

_"Tell me how you like it..." Kris groaned as he imagined feeling Adam's rings digging into the nape of his neck, pushing him down on his cock._

_Adam stopped as he heard Kris' voice in the shower. Hadn't the boy ever watched_ Psycho _? He grinned. Maybe Kris needed to learn a lesson. Lucky for Kris, everyone always said Adam liked to teach. Now they may have said he was bossy, but clearly he just liked to... instruct others._

_"Give me that dick..." Kris moaned slowly as he imagined unzipping Adam's jeans and pulling out his cock. He licked his lips and wondered what Adam would taste like, if Adam's hands would press against his head or neck, holding him in place or--_

_Adam raised his hand as if he was holding a knife and ran toward the shower curtain, shrieking loudly as he pulled it aside. Oh shit, Kris had been --_

_"AYIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Kris screamed. He took a step back, slipped on the wet tub, instinctively reaching out, his hands catching on the plastic shower curtain and pulling, he managed to pull the rod right out of the wall, plaster chips flying everywhere. "OH SHIT!" He yelled as the rod and curtain fell on his head and he slid onto his butt inside the tub, the water from the shower still running on top of him, the plaster disintegrating into wet grey sludge around him._

_"I don't even..." Adam began, then started to laugh loudly. He looked down at Kris, his eyes wild and startled and totally aggravated, his hair standing up on end even though it was wet and now dusted with plaster, his body wrapped in a plastic fish-theme curtain and he laughed harder. "That... was... the... funniest thing...Ohmigod... ever!" He bent forward as laughter engulfed him._

_"Shaddup!" Kris yelled, trying to get up and tangled himself further in the shower curtain and rod. He slid onto his butt again, watching Adam double over. As Adam sat down on the toilet and his gales of laughter filled the room, Kris began to smile, then surrendered to the ridiculousness of the situation and Adam's infectious amusement and laughed himself._

_"Let me get you out of this mess," Adam offered, as he wiped his eyes and stood up._

_"Seems to be our story, doesn't it?" Kris retorted, shoving the pole away, then swearing when it rolled back and nearly beaned him on the head. He sighed. "I'd really like it if just once you didn't have to rescue me."_

_"Why? I enjoy it." And it wasn't as if Kris wasn't pulling him out of the mud either, Adam mused as he reached into the tub and grabbed the rod and turned it vertical, while carefully pulling it free of Kris' legs. Wet legs, wet body, wet skin. Oh, this was a great morning. Even if it did have plaster dust all over it. Nothing a little more water wouldn't clean up. More water..._

_"Hey -- this time it was your fault!" Kris realized. He stood up carefully and watched as Adam set the pole and crinkled plastic sheet of his shower curtain to the side. The shrieking clank of metal made his teeth clench as the curtain rings slid down the rod and fell onto the floor, then his mouth dropped open as he saw the way Adam was looking at him. Maybe this wasn't a total disaster..._

_"It was. I'll make it up to you. I'll buy the spackle and fix your hole... In your wall." Adam stood back and leered at Kris. "You do realize you're naked."_


	10. Hunger Games

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks  
> Rating: NC-17

Begins immediately following Chapter 9. **Chapter 10: Hunger Games  
Rating: NC-17**

 

__

_Adam stood back and leered at Kris. "You do realize you're naked."_

_"You do realize you're not," Kris retorted, then admitted, "I'm trying to ignore the fact that not only was I, am I, naked but that you saw me... you know..." He turned away and turned off the water to hide his embarrassment, then forgot about the notion of shame when he forced himself to look back and saw the bulge in Adam's jeans. His hand unconsciously rubbed his thigh as his erection recovered at the evidence that Adam was as affected as he was. No shame here._

_"Why? I enjoy it." Adam smiled as he continued staring at Kris' compact little body. Sweet, the way his cock was rising back up to the occasion. Kris apparently liked being watched, which was a fantastic coincidence given that Adam liked watching Kris. He also enjoyed Kris' flirtatious little glances up at him and wondered how far he could push Kris. "Hell, this has been the best morning I've had in months and it's not even eight o'clock yet!"_

_"Why, because you nearly gave me a heart attack?" Placing his hand over his pounding heart, Kris licked his lower lip as he stared at the denim stretching over Adam's cock._

_"Well, there is that. And the fact that you were naked, wet, and stroking your hard cock." He would swear that his words made heat spark in Kris' eyes and unable to resist, Adam reached his hands out, needing to touch that skin. His left hand sliding around Kris' waist, and wrapping his right around Kris' throat, his thumb on Kris' collarbone, Adam pulled him forward. "Mine..." He said without conscious thought as his mouth took Kris' lips in a hard kiss that made Kris' head drop back even as his mouth opened eagerly, sucking Adam's tongue into his mouth._

_Feeling Adam's hand stroke down to his ass and squeeze his bare flesh hard just as Adam bit his bottom lip, Kris wound his arms around Adam's neck and held on as Adam's kiss, as always, sent his senses spinning and whirling to some place he'd never known before but needing moremoremore, he pulled back to curse at the tub wall separating them._

_Adam's fingertips slowed as he realized he was rubbing against plaster dust. Ugh, Kris did not need plaster in sensitive areas. Adam pulled back reluctantly. "You need to wash the plaster off of you. Finish your shower." He grinned. He was going to take two showers this morning. He was going to take a leap of faith this morning, in fact. "In fact--"_

_"Did you even_ consider _pulling back? Stopping?" Kris asked, turning to switch the water back on, angling the shower head so he didn't spray water all over the floor before stepping into it, eager to clean up so they could get dirty. He hurriedly scrubbed at his hair, then looked up at Adam, who was looking at his ass. Wow, this day was looking up. He grinned. "Or I don't know... starting something?"_

_"In that split second when I realized you were jerking yourself off, hell, yeah, I did consider stopping. But it was too late." It was too late, Adam realized, probably from the moment Kris had asked him out that day in Starbucks. And today -- when the traffic gods had sent him early to find Kris looking way more edible than breakfast... At a certain point, didn't you have to acknowledge when the universe was pushing you toward your future?_

_"Welllll...." Kris drawled slowly and looked up at Adam hopefully. "It's not too late now. So what would you have done if you could have pulled back?"_

_Adam raised an eyebrow at Kris' flirting. "Why, Mr. Allen. You're trying to seduce me!"_

_"Seduce? Hell, no. That takes too long with you. At this point, I'd pay_ you _to get in my bed. If I had one, which I don't, just that blow-up mattress, which is the problem, isn't it? Or_ a _problem or--"_

_Adam laughed at Kris' nervous babbling. "God, I..." He shoved the thought away, telling himself, 'Too soon. Enjoy the moment,' and continued, "You're not usually the aggressor, are you?"_

_"No. So take pity," Kris begged even as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of Adam's jeans and tugged him closer._

_"Pity is not what I'm going to take," Adam said quickly, as he reached for his shirt and pulled it off. Time to take that leap of faith. Faith that Kris was the real thing, that there were no cameras in here, no plans to sell the story to some rag -- he lost his train of thought as Kris' fingers slid inside his jeans, his wet fingertips cooling and heating his skin at the same time. Oh fuck, yeah._

_"Praise the lord and pass the syrup..." Kris mumbled, fumbling with the jean zipper as he realized they were finally going to get naked together. "Or the soap. I'll drop it and bend over. Or..." He lost his train of thought as Adam laughed, then impatiently flicked his hands away and shoved the zipper and his jeans down, while toeing off his shoes. "Oh yeah, that'll work..." He sucked in a breath as he saw Adam naked for the first time. Broad shoulders and hard nipples and strong arms and all those freckles, damn, he wanted ... his gaze stopped and locked and his own cock loaded as he saw Adam's. "Good god..."_

_"Nope, just me..." Adam smiled in relief as he saw desire flare to life in Kris' eyes as he looked at Adam. He wasn't perfect, far from it, could still lose a few pounds, but Kris didn't seem to mind. In fact..._

_"Those pictures were a lie!" Kris blurted out, his eyes as huge as his lust. "And I'm so fucking glad. Get in here. Before I have to take matters in my own hands again." Yum, yum, he was going to get all of_ that _?_

_"What were you thinking about when you had matters in your own hands?" Adam asked as he stepped into the tub and reached around Kris to turn on the water, shivering with anticipation when Kris took the opportunity to give a long lick up his chest._

_Ohmigod, Adam was even going to talk his way through_ this _? Of course, he was. Kris smiled as Adam hurriedly turned him back to face the shower. He gasped at the pressure of Adam's hands on his hips, then gasped again in shock when he felt Adam's long body... oh god, finally, his long naked body press up against his back as Adam's arms encircled him. And hell yeah, his cock poked him in the small of his back, not where he wanted to be poked, so he wiggled back, then cursed his height. If he were taller, that cock would have slid right between his legs. Damn it. "Adammmm..."_

_"I asked you a question. What were you thinking about?" Adam demanded, lowering his head to whisper into Kris' ear as he reached for the soap and lathered his hands. If they were slippery, he wouldn't be able to lift Kris up and just take him. Steps... get some control._

_"Ummm. I don't remember?" Kris mumbled, watching Adam's hands move toward his body and thenohyesohyesfinally his hands began stroking all over, starting on his abdomen and then slowly ohgodwhysoslowhewassoreadyalready stroke up over his chest ohhellIneverknewmynippleswerethatsensitive? Kris tilted his head back again, resting it against Adam's shoulder, then rolled his head until he could bite at Adam's neck. "Hurry up. Touch me."_

_"Tell me first. What you were thinking," Adam demanded, determined to get Kris talking long enough that he could get control over the urge to shove Kris up against the tiled wall and just thrust into his body. He was afraid the tiles couldn't take the shoving. Not that he'd lose control or anything, he was just concerned about Kris' security deposit._

_Damn, Adam tasted good, Kris thought as he licked at the bite mark on Adam's neck while pressing back and rubbing against the hard ridge along his lower back. What did Adam taste like there? "What makes you think I was thinking? I could've just been_ doing _it--"_

_"I heard your voice. You were talking. That means you were thinking, aloud, as usual. And given what you usually blurt out when you're thinking aloud, I want to know." I need the truth, Adam thought, even as his body urged him to find the truth in other ways. All sorts of truths._

_"OH!" Kris exclaimed as Adam's hands, wet and slippery, cupped and stroked his balls._

_"Tell me or I'l stop..." Adam whispered into Kris' ear. "You don't want me to stop, do you? I haven't even touched your cock yet..."_

_I...." Kris blushed and looked down, then bit his lip as he watched Adam's big hands fondle him, the silver ring on his right hand glinting up through the soap lather. Oh hell, he was probably gonna get a fetish about that and -- "OHohoh!" Kris cried out as Adam's fingers brushed the underside of his cock._

_"Did you like that little taste?" Adam smiled against Kris' ear. "Want more? Then tell me."_

_"Adammmmm....." Kris moaned as he felt a sizzle of heat rush up from the feel of the hot metal of Adam's ring along the underside of his cock and the rumble of the demanding tone of Adam's voice that seemed to reverberate from Adam's chest right into his own, the twin flashes of heat igniting both his heart and his desire. And damn, Adam was so hot when he was bossy. Kris looked up, saw the heat in Adam's eyes and answered immediately. "I was thinking of sucking you off."_

_"Where?" Adam asked automatically, looking down over Kris' shoulder to watch Kris' cock in his hands, groaning as he saw Kris thrust faster and faster into the channel he'd created with soapy hands. "Where were you thinking of sucking me off?"_

_"On your cock. D'uh."" Kris moved his hips more roughly, needing..._

_Bursting into laughter, Adam shook his head and turned Kris around to face him. His hands closed over Kris' ass and pulled him up as his mouth descended, demandingly slanting across Kris' lips, his tongue commanding Kris to respond, then groaned as Kris once again sucked him deeper. His cock rose hard and high between them and his arms tightened as he felt Kris' eagerness in his mouth, in the calloused hands clutching as his back, at the teeth nipping at his bottom lip._

_Tearing his mouth away, Adam groaned. "You are going to be the death of me. I'll die happy, but..." He slid his hand down Kris' shoulders and along the wet expanse of Kris' chest, skimming over the tight nipples, before lightly touching the flat belly and sliding over wet skin down to a hard, wet cock eagerly pushing into his circled hand. "Where were we?"_

_"Where? Huh?" Looking down at the hard cock poking into his abdomen, Kris moaned and reached for it, smiling when Adam hissed in a breath and shoved forcefully into his grip. Finally, in his grip. A good start. But he needed that cock inside him. LIke now. "I'll.. I'll go anywhere you want. The kitchen? My chair? The floor? The wall. The wall's good--"_

_"I meant, in your fantasy, where were we?" Adam asked, desperate to hang onto control before he embarrassed himself. That first touch of Kris' hand around his cock had caused his body to clench while the open need mixed with affection or something deeper in Kris' eyes had made his head spin. It had been so long since it was more than getting off that he was in danger of losing it too soon._

_"Oh." Kris blushed again, even as he could not resist pushing against Adam's hand and squeezing the cock in his own. His now. He'd been given this opportunity and wasn't going to blow it. Heh. He was going to blow it. Heh. "I was..."_

_"Distracted. Yeah, I'm a man. I know all about how a hard cock is distracting."_

_"I doubt it, Mr. Focus." Kris wanted to see Adam lose his focus,_ completely, _one day. Just once. Due to him. He'd seen little glimpses of how he could distract Adam, but he wanted more. Hell, that was really the theme of being with Adam -- wanting more. Like right now, he wanted more. More of Adam's cock. In his mouth._

_'What did you want me to do to you?" Cupping Kris' balls in his hands, Adam felt how they'd drawn up against his body. Oh god, he was that close already? So hot. "Tell me and I'll do it for you."_

_"Hold my head down." Once again fastening his mouth to Adam's chest, Kris began licking at the damp skin, feeling surrounded by the heated scent of the man mixed with need, although he wasn't sure if it was Adam's or his own, or the two of them creating something new. Biting at the top of Adam's chest muscle, he whispered, "Yeah, push me down. Hold my head down."_

_Adam hissed in a breath as he felt his skin flush with heat. The words, the image, the mouth on his skin... "No. I meant, what did you want me to do_ for _you?"_

_"Nuthin'. Yet, anyway. I was jest fantasizing 'bout sucking your cock. That's... all!" Kris squeaked as Adam's hands moved up again and began stroking him in long firm movements, teasing the tip, then back down to the base, taking him close to the edge too soon._

_"That's enough..." Adam growled. The combination of someone fantasizing about something other than what he could do for them, the heat in Kris' eyes, and the ever-deepening accent in his low voice was making his head spin and his cock throb with need._

_"Enough talkin'?" Kris asked eagerly, dimly aware that the water was running cold and searching blindly behind him to turn off the shower._

_"Yes. Use your mouth for something else." Placing his hands on Kris' shoulders, Adam pressed down firmly._

_"Oh boy..." Kris stared up into Adam's eyes, glad he was going to be kneeling given how his knees had gotten wobbly in inverse proportion to the hardness of his dick._

_"No, you're my boy, aren't you?" Adam asked, moving one hand to the back of Kris' neck and pressing him forward. "Suck me off the way you said you would."_

_"I will and by the way...That pic musta been photoshopped..." Kris blurted out, his hand curling around the base of Adam's cock as his head moved forward. "Because, day-ummm, mah prayers ha' bin answered and mah hopes ha' bin reee-ah-lized."_

_Unable to stop himself, Adam laughed. "Oh, Kris..." He stopped laughing abruptly as Kris engulfed his cock into the wetness of his mouth and slid down on it. Sliding his left hand into Kris' hair, Adam cupped the back of his head and the other, his neck. "Take it slow."_

_"But...I want you..." Kris murmured, pulling back to lick at the tip, then caress the underside of the head. "All of you. And isn't this my fantasy?"_

_"I... Well, as someone once said, there's stubborn and then there's stupid. And I've got a hot boy with a hot mouth on my dick. So..." Adam smiled and pushed Kris forward again. "I guess I can make the sacrifice and let you give me a blow job."_

_"Oh, thanks so much." Kris grinned up at Adam. Whodathunk sex could be_ fun _?_

 _"Well, I do like feeding you." Smiling down at Kris, Adam wondered why he'd never had this much fun during sex before. Kris was just_ different _, but sometimes seemed so familiar, like he was what Adam had been waiting for, but didn't know. Was this what fate felt like? Then again, who cared right now, given what Kris' mouth felt like?_

_"Well, I'm so glad I could make you happy by... eating..." Kris parted his lips and waited, sure enough, Adam pushed him forward and with his hands controlled the speed. Opening his mouth wider, Kris sank down further as he worked on taking it all, feeling goosebumps prickle along his skin at the size and heat of the cock in his mouth, the prickles turning to little sparks that seemed to send flashes to his own cock, making him tremble with need._

_Bracing one hand against the tile wall to keep from shoving into Kris' mouth, Adam stared down at Kris, their eyes focused on each other as Kris seemed to feast himself bit by bit on Adam's cock, his wet mouth and rough tongue and soft lips taking them both higher. He licked his lips as he watched Kris move his right hand to his own cock and stroke it in time with the rhythm Adam was setting with his hand on Kris' head._

_It was one of those moments in life, Kris realized vaguely, that you wanted both to go on forever and yet couldn't wait to get_ there _, but... then he felt Adam's fingers tighten on his neck and his own hand tightened on his cock and his cock got harder and the cock in his mouth filled him just as the look in Adam's eyes filled some emptiness inside him he hadn't even known needed filling and then suddenly, with no warning, he lost control and groaned, feeling Adam gasp, then his body hitch at the sound and swallowed hard as Adam finally surrendered to what lay before him._

_Combing his fingers through Kris' hair, Adam pulled his face back and tilted his chin up to look at him. "That was hot and sweet and fierce and silly. That was..."_

_"Amazing. Thanks." Kris smirked as Adam pulled him to his feet, then lost his smirk as Adam kissed him until he was seriously considering round two. And three. And moving them both someplace far far away from Adam's phone so round four could last forever. "And you... You're ... sweet..." Kris licked his lower lip. "I mean it. You tasted_ sweet _."_

_"It's all the fruit I eat." Adam nodded, lightly running his fingers over Kris' cheek. Was this for real? It had to be._

_Having turned away to turn the water back on, Kris turned back jerkily. "All that fruit... Are you kidding me?"_

_"No." Adam grinned. "Why do you think I sent you the world's largest fruit basket?"_

_Kris laughed. "I'll have to keep myself in stock."_

_"Especially the strawberries."_

_"Oh, really?" Kris smiled up at Adam, then sighed as he saw the sweetness in Adam's face, the caring in his eyes. When was the last time someone had looked at him like that -- like he mattered?_

_"I was going to take care of you..." Adam protested softly, brushing his thumb across Kris' reddened lips. "I feel like I didn't--"_

_"Next time," Kris promised, wrapping his arms around Adam and hugging him tightly. "Next time you can eat me. But first mebbe I need some fruit too! Pineapples, do they work?"_

_"Mmm...." Adam bent his head and kissed Kris' smiling lips. "But you need protein too. A balanced diet."_

__

"You really want me to _bite_ your sausage? Oooh, kinky." Adam winked salaciously, then asked asked impulsively, "So, how about on your next night off, we go do some karaoke? Or go dancing? Yeah, dancing."

Pausing with his fork in mid-air, Kris gaped, then sat the utensil down with a clatter. Adam was actually interested in hearing him sing? He was... flabbergasted. "Do you do that deliberately or is it just natural?"

"Oh honey, everything improves with practice..." Adam smirked. "So, you want to practice spackling that hole in your--"

"I mean..." Kris said with exaggerated patience, then looked down to hide his own amusement. Adam obviously enjoyed baiting him and he could never seem to resist taking the bait. Now, that was ironic. Anyway... He had caught on to how Adam found ways to make him relax and comfortable. "How you always change the subject when I get all..." Kris waved his hand. 

"Prickly? Prideful? Pokey?"

"Pokey? Does that make you Gumby? Sometimes you do that thing to your hair..." Kris made a swooping motion with his hand over his head, chuckling when Adam grinned. "And it looks like Gumby's head."

"Well, if I'm Gumby and you're Pokey, that does indicate that I'll be riding you."

Kris licked his lips. "Soon, I hope and --- Wait! Did Gumby ever actually ride Pokey?"

Adam froze. "Wow, I don't know. I think they have some of that show on dvd. We should get it from Netflix." 

"We should!" Kris agreed. It would be great to just hang out with Adam and watch old tv shows. Together. On a couch. In his house. Alone. Alone on Adam's own turf. Yup, that was the ticket. Then _Adam_ would relax and be comfortable enough to--

"We should what?" A woman's voice asked. They both looked up.

"Lane." Adam smiled, then asked, "Not that I'm not glad to see you, but what are you doing here?"

Being nosy, Lane thought to herself. Then as she saw Adam's knowing smile, she knew she was busted. Oh well. She grinned back at him, wondering how soon she could call Leila. 

Kris wiped his mouth with his napkin and looked down as Lane explained. He reached for his phone and swore silently as he realized he'd once again left it at home. 

"I do have big changes to your schedule today per Jacob..." Lane waited for Adam's requisite groan, looking in surprise as Kris groaned too at Jacob's name. "You've met Jacob the Jerk?" She smiled when Adam shifted on his booth seat and made room for her. 

"Yes, twice. First was when I went to the label and got rejected." Kris grimaced. "I was actually.... uh, this is embarrassing..."

"Well, then, do tell!" Lane urged. "I love embarrassing stories! That's why I'll never stop working for Adam."

"I'm so glad you dropped by, Laney," Adam said drily, even as he signaled the waitress for coffee for her. "I always feel such a wave of overwhelming support from you." 

"Hey, wasn't I the one who told the paps that your dick was bloody well huge and --"

Adam groaned as the waitress stopped in mid-pour to stare at Lane. "Thanks for the public support! It's grrrrrrrrreat!" 

Kris laughed. They were like brother and sister. He missed his -- Don't think about it, Kris. "So, about the paps--"

"Forget about it, Kris," Lane ordered. "The story of Jacob the Jerk, if you please." 

"Oh, I was hoping you'd forget."

"If I forgot, Adam wouldn't. He never forgets," Lane warned.

Adam grinned. "That's me. I'm a regular elephant."

"That's what I told the paps!" Lane retorted. 

Kris laughed as the two of them stared at each other and giggled. 

Lane smiled in surprised relief at Adam's laughter. This was the first time he'd laughed about the incident since it had happened in her presence. His lack of humor wasn't because he was truly upset about aspersions cast on the size of his equipment. It was because he'd lost faith in his own judgment or in others or both. Hmm. Had time healed the wounds or had this Kris... Hmm. "So the story?"

Kris nodded. "I was waiting in the hallway -- the one where there are all the posters of the label's artists?"

Lane nodded. "The one where Adam's poster is his last Rolling Stone cover?"

"That one. Which is even hotter than the first one." Kris licked his lower lip. Someday, maybe, he'd admit to Adam that he'd jacked off more than once to that cover. Someday, maybe, he'd ask admit to pose for him, alone, just like that. 

"Totally!" Lane agreed, just to watch Adam blush. She loved how he could be the most overtly sexual being she'd ever seen on stage and then blush about a photograph in which he was -- of course -- fully clothed and doing nothing more than eye-fucking the camera. 

"Oh gawd... " Adam groaned, his face turning red. "Why do you do this?"

"Because it's fun!" Kris and Lane said in unison. 

"This is bad news...." Adam groaned, even as he was glad to see the carefree amusement on Kris' face. His face had been filling out and the little worry lines disappearing. All good. "You two ganging up on me. And Kris-- I'm still waiting for that story." 

Surrendering to the inevitable, Kris began. "I was looking at the poster--"

"Drooling, I'd wager," Lane surmised given the way Kris had been looking at Adam since she'd come into the restaurant. It almost seemed like overkill for her to travel to Arkansas to check out Kris' story. _Almost._ She had seen how devastated Adam was at he-shall-not-be-named's betrayal and understood why he second-guessed everything. Hell, so did she nowadays. So off to Arkansas. How bad could it be?

"Apparently." Kris blushed, even as he wondered why Lane's gaze had flicked from amused to speculative and then to determined all in an instant. "Well, who wouldn't? Anyway, Jacob comes slithering down the hallway--"

"No doubt on his belly like the snake he is," Lane added. "Adam, you should totally write some song about a snake and use it as a metaphor. Or simile or whatever that is."

"Yeah. And Kris?" Adam pressed. "Tell me." 

Nodding, Kris realized Adam was not going to be distracted. He gave in and continued, "And says to me, 'Don't get too excited, you'll never achieve half of what he's achieved."

"What a jerk!" Adam exclaimed. "How the hell would he know anything about your potential? He's not an A and R man, he's no fucking Clive Davis and... Argh. He doesn't know anything, he just likes upsetting people." 

"Yeah, I got that, but I gotta admit in that moment, when I was all anxious... didn't help. Then he says -- because the first crack wasn't enough apparently -- that, "Yeah, you'll never get a piece of that musically or otherwise, because although you're his type, he'll never notice you in that damn ugly plaid. You're not glam enough." 

Adam growled. "First of all, I am not that shallow."

"Indeed not." Lane nodded.

"Absolutely. I noticed your ass first." Adam shrugged. "You said twice, you met him twice. When was the other time?"

Kris nodded. Adam didn't miss a trick. How had that other guy fooled him? It wasn't possible... Oh. Adam maybe had overlooked the red flags and... hence the tests. Kris nodded again, to himself. He'd already known that and needed to remind himself that Adam's caution was actually realistic. "When you took me to the recording session with you last week. I met him in the men's room." 

"Oh gawd, what did he say then?" Adam asked, feeling a pulse pound in his temple. He liked Kris, a lot, and from the look of embarrassment on Kris' face, Jacob had hurt his pride or done something else heinous. Damn it, he didn't want Kris scared off due to his pr rep. How stupid would that be? 

"He just..." Kris looked down at his plate and pushed his hash browns around with his fork. "He's just a jerk, like you guys call him. A mean girl, only a guy."

"I think he's jealous," Lane announced. 

"C'mon..." Adam rolled his eyes. He whispered to Kris, "She's so loyal, she thinks every gay guy wants me. I pay her well."

"It has nothing to do with her paycheck, believe me. She's right." Kris grinned. "Or about any gay guy with good taste or brains. Which does leave Jacob out, right?"

"Yes. So as usual, Laney, I'm right." 

"You are _insufferable_." Lane sighed. "But what did he say?"

"I...I don't want to get into it." Kris frowned at Adam, then acquiesced as Adam's intense stare unnerved him. "Okay, he said something about how I must be a better... uh...let's say... dental hygienist than he gave me credit for if you were still dating me... and some other stuff."

Adam gritted his teeth as anger surged through his body, then gave Lane a gentle elbow. "Will you excuse me, please?"

"Adam..." Lane protested, then gave up and slid out. As Adam stood up from the seat, she warned, "Don't yell. Your voice."

"Oh, I don't have to yell." Adam pressed a button on his phone as he walked outside. 

"What's going on?" Kris asked, peering through the glass as Adam paced in front of the restaurant, talking passionately into his phone. Wow, hoped Adam never got that mad at him, Kris thought as he nervously reached for his cup.

"He's about to ream Jacob and I doubt Jacob will enjoy it the way you would." Lane paused as Kris choked on the sip of coffee he'd just taken. "Then again. Maybe Jacob does enjoy it. Maybe he's a masochist. Although I think he's a sadist, given how he seems to enjoy pissing off people. Maybe he's a switch hitter."

Kris blinked, then laughed, then frowned. "Wait. He's gonna yell at Jacob for what he said to me?"

"Adam cannot stand meanness or rudeness. Jacob was both." Lane grinned and leaned forward. "Word to the wise. Don't get Adam mad."

"Why? Does he turn green and become the Hulk?"

"He turns red and... basically, you want to run. He's the sweetest guy in the world, really. But he has a temper. I mean, he's not scary, but... that intensity he has?" Lane shuddered. "He's never gotten mad like that at me, but I've seen it. And while he forgives, he --" 

"So where were we?" Adam asked as he sat back down. Jacob would be off his team for the near future. 

"You were talking about riding," Lane supplied, as she helped herself to some of Adam's fruit.

"That's right. Gumby and Pokey." Adam waited, then slapped Lane's hand as she tried to sneak his last strawberry. He smiled as Kris frowned at Lane. 

Lane sighed. "That's bloody disappointing. I was hoping for some good sex talk and you two are talking about Claymation?"

"For Halloween--" Adam grinned and pointed at Kris. "I see a costume in your future." 

"I am not going as Pokey." Kris shook his head, feeling confident. Where in the world would Adam even find a Pokey costume, anyway?

"Fine. Dress up as Prickle." Adam smiled. He knew someone from the Zodiac Show who was a consummate costume-maker. 

"Ha. Ha. Ha." Kris rolled his eyes. Although that was probably better than the hedgehog costume he expected Adam to suggest. 

Reading the looks passing over Kris' face, Lane warned, "If you think he couldn't come up with that costume, you're very foolish. Adam knows _people_."

"Uh-oh..." Kris groaned. 

"Dani could be Prickle's sister!" Adam exclaimed excitedly.

"What was her name? Goo or Boo?" Kris asked.

"No, hold on. Lane can be Prickle's sister."

"I...what?" Lane shook her head. "No way. I'm not getting involved in one of your costume extrava--"

"Goo," Kris interjected. "She was Goo, Prickle's sister. I think? "

"We need to get the dvds. Lane, can you order them for me, please?"

Blinking at the change of subject, Lane began, "I, sure, but I'm not going as--" 

"Totally. And Lane would be perfect for Goo. She had blonde hair. But wait. Wasn't she blue?" Kris asked, innocently looking over at Adam.

"She was. A mermaid too. Oooh, I can see the costume, Lane." Adam touched Lane's face, grinning as she glared at him. "And Sutan and I can totally make you blue."

Kris grinned, then nodded at Lane. "Good luck with that makeup. And getting it off." 

"Thanks." Lane grimaced, then stuck her tongue out at Kris. "Why did I think I liked you?"

Adam said eagerly, "Dani can go as Minga, Gumby's sister."

"Neil could go as a Blockhead," Lane offered resigning herself to the inevitable. 

"Ah! Now you're talking." Adam laughed and then pointed at Kris' plate. "Are you still hungry?"

"I bet you actually have your Halloween costume all picked out already, don't you?" Kris asked, realizing he had to distract Adam or he'd end up with a doggie bag of food sufficient for three days. 

Shaking his head, Adam denied it. "Not yet. Brad -- my ex. He's a good friend now. He thinks we should go as a pair -- David and Goliath. I think the chief attraction to him is that he thinks since David was in the Middle East that he could go mostly naked except for a pair of boots and some sort of loin cloth."

"He's have to have a rock, right? What would he use as a rock?" Kris asked curiously.

"That's what I'm afraid of. Very afraid." Adam grinned. 

Lane rolled her eyes. "I'm afraid too. And I won't go shopping with him again, Adam. He has even more energy than you and I'd rather go back to my old job as a dog walker with an assortment of terriers than shop with him again. For a rock." 

"What do you have that's round?" Adam leered in the direction of Kris' groin, wishing he had x-ray vision. "Well, I can imagine four--"

"Four?" Kris echoed, looking down at himself. Grinning, he looked back up. "I'm not sure why you think I'm a carnival freak, but--"

"Butt -- that is what I'm talking about. I stood behind you in Starbucks. Your ass is nice and round, plus venturing further on... remember those melons?" 

"I do not want to know, I do not want to know..." Lane repeated, then asked, "Wait. Tell me." 

Adam shook his head and raised an eyebrow at Kris. 

"My ass?" Kris gulped. "But how would that work?"

"Didn't David use a sling of some kind?"

"Yeah. A sling, but--" Kris stopped abruptly and felt his face turn bright red. 

"I could totally get on board your ass in a sling," Adam said with a wink. 

"You, sir, are a dirty flirt!"

"You can clean me up later." Adam winked.

Kris laughed. "Why the hell would I do that? I'm having way too much fun." He hadn't had this much fun since he'd left ho-- Arkansas. 

"Good. So am I." Adam smiled back at Kris. "It's probably against the Code of Glam to have this much fun in the morning unless you didn't go to bed the night before." 

"Well, maybe the code isn't rules, but just suggestions?" Kris asked. "Like the pirate code."

"Ah yes, that code..." Adam turned to Lane, who had been sitting quietly. And probably making notes to read back to the band or worse, Geoffrey or worst of all, his mother. "Kris is totally into pirates."

"Is he?" Lane asked, looking in surprise at Kris.

"Yeah. He wants me booty." 

Lane laughed. Kris shook his head. "You think he's kidding?" He asked, grinning at Adam and kicking him under the table. 

"So why were you up so early, anyway?" Lane asked as she consulted her calendar. "You didn't have anything scheduled today until ten thirty."

"Kris works evenings, so breakfast works for him."

Lane nodded. "Breakfast is good. I know if I don't have a good breakfast, I'm grumpy as Gokey until lunchtime." 

Seeing the compassion in Lane's eyes, Kris blushed and looked down at his plate. She knew. He jumped when both Lane and Adam reached out and took a hand. "What..."

"It's okay, Kris." Adam squeezed while Lane patted his hand. 

Looking up, from Adam to Lane and back again, Kris swallowed over the lump in his throat and nodded. Adam was a sweet guy. And Lane was just as warm. He was meeting _nice_ people, people he could be friends with, thanks to-- "Thanks for breakfast," he said, his voice rough because his throat was tight. "Thanks." 

"So." Adam turned to Lane and changed the subject, knowing Kris' pride had been pricked. "Kris hasn't agreed to go karaoke with us." 

"Oh, well, you didn't say Lane was going. Count me in." Kris winked at Lane. He liked Lane a lot and his fears about meeting Adam's friends had decreased. Adam was a great guy, Lane was warm and funny, and he'd bet Adam's other friends were too. He actually wanted to meet them. Besides, he could use some friends, it had been a long time and now... His life seemed to have changed with the momentous decision to go to Starbucks that day. Maybe the big guy did have his best interests at heart. 

"Oh great. Since Lane is going, Kris will go." Adam sniffed. "I see where I rank in this _menage_."

"Oh please, you're the top," Kris blurted out. Lane burst out laughing and Kris blushed. 

"Not yet." Adam pointed at Kris' plate. "Eat up. You'll need your strength for that."

"Sorry." Lane grinned and held up her coffee cup as the waitress returned with the pot. "I said you had schedule changes. You have ninety minutes before you're due at the studio for a photo shoot. Then you're free."

"Well. Not enough time now." Adam shrugged apologetically at Kris.

"Ha. You weren't going to put out anyway. You're a big cock---" Kris broke off as the waitress once again stopped in mid-pour. "Tease?"

Adam winked at the waitress. "Always leave them wanting more is my motto." 

"Works for me every time," the waitress agreed with a grin.

"See?" Adam nodded. 

"Not yet!" Kris complained, while smiling at Adam. 

"Geez, we've all seen pictures of the glambulge," the waitress retorted as she walked off. "Don't you have internet?"

"Yeah, Kris," Lane agreed. "You really need to have a better idea of what you're getting into or...what's getting into you."

Kris smirked. He had an up close and personal idea. Next shower, he'd have to use three fingers on himself. 

"Someday. If he eats all of his breakfast..." Adam said in a sing-song voice. 

"Someday. I will kill you..." Kris used the same sing-song tone. 

"You need protein to make it last..."

"You are giving me balls that are blue..." 

"Oh god... please you two, never write a song together..." Lane groaned. 

"Wait, that reminds me. I was thinking of writing a humorous song about the infamous pictures. Kris, want to help me?" Adam asked, winking at Kris when Lane groaned again.

"Well, I'd have to look up synonyms for small.... _Sweetie._ " Kris enjoyed the amusement in Adam's expressive face, sure he too must have a grin from ear to ear comparable to Adam's. 

"Well, small would be a term with which you're familiar..." Adam drawled. _Sweetie?_

"And then there's wrinkled. And shrinkage. What rhymes with them?" 

"Dead meat?" Adam growled, hoping he was actor enough to fool Kris for a second.

Kris startled, then seeing the glint in Adam's eyes, broke into loud laughter. "You know, that is a good description of those photos... Your meat did look--"

"Wait." Lane looked from Kris to Adam. There was something different... "You..." She clamped her mouth shut, but as Kris looked at her, he saw the knowing amusement in her eyes. 

"Yeah. My jaw still aches." Looking from Lane to Adam and seeing the shock in their faces, Kris realized what he'd done. "Oh shit. I spoke out loud again, didn't I?" 

"Oh god!" Lane giggled helplessly as Adam bent forward with laughter. Lane started when her phone rang and with a whispered excuse, left the table.

Unable to resist the infectious laughter or the warmth in Adam's face directed at him, Kris got up and went around to Adam's side of the booth, sliding down the booth seat until he could lean against Adam. He smiled when Adam put his arm around him and hugged him close. God, he loved how affectionate Adam was, how his touch filled the need he had not just for touch, though, but for something more. "I didn't feel cold this morning even when the hot water heater started to konk out. I..I haven't felt this alive or warm in years..." Kris whispered, looking up at Adam.

"I'm sorry you've felt lonely that long," Adam whispered back. He pulled Kris even more firmly against him, feeling once again that long shudder Kris tended to make before he relaxed against Adam's body. He was sure it was a shudder of need realized, then the relief of a need met. It was as easy to fill that need for Kris as it was to fill his stomach, easier, though given that a hug and a touch were always something he could give. he smiled again and touched Kris' cheek, watching Kris sigh again and close his eyes while turning his face into the touch. 

"Not any more. I'm so glad I decided to go to Starbucks that day." 

"Me too. What are the odds?" Adam smiled as Kris kissed his hand.

HIs heart thumping as Kris considered how differently his days and his nights and hell, maybe even his damn life might be turning out had he made different decisions, Kris swallowed hard. This, he vowed, was not going to be taken away from him. Whatever it took... Taking a deep breath and inhaling the scent of Adam's warmth, Kris sighed happily. "Hey. So this morning... I've practically made a fool of myself before trying to seduce you. What gave this morning?"

"My control." Adam grinned. "You were naked, remember?"

"You mean all I had to do was get naked..." Kris laughed at himself. "I swear if I were filing out a dating questionnaire, I'd have to say that one of my strengths is overlooking the obvious solution to a problem." He glanced down at Adam's phone, saw the time and frowned. "Oh hell, you probably have to get going, don't you?" He reluctantly shoved along the booth bench.

"Yeah. The traffic. Which was apparently on my side this morning." Adam waited until Kris slid off of the bench, then followed before going over to the register to pay." Do you want to come with me to the photo shoot?" Adam asked as he finished paying for breakfast and shoved his sunglasses on his face. He hadn't seen any paps, but you couldn't be too careful. "You could follow me in your truck, if you want." 

"I think I'm up for following you about anywhere." 

Adam caught his breath at the honesty in Kris' eyes. Wow. He touched Kris' arm, squeezing his bicep, then smiled. "Good, then dancing will happen soon."

"I didn't agree to that--" Kris protested, just to have another argument with Adam. He blinked as he walked out into bright sunlight and Adam proceeded to explain why they were going to go dancing, when they'd be doing it and what Kris should wear. He smiled up at the sunshine. This was going to be a great day. Maybe even... a great life. He crossed his fingers and said the first prayer in a long time.


	11. Inspired, tested, dared and almost dazzled

**Chapter 11: Inspired, tested, dared and almost dazzled  
Rating: R**

 

"I'm not much of a dancer," Kris confessed as he looked at the dance floor. Everyone here seemed like they might be professional dancers or wannabe professional dancers. Or just totally uninhibited. And really glamorous. None of which he was. Even the strong drink he'd slammed back upon arriving here and realizing he was totally out of his element would convince him he could do this well enough to impress Adam the way he wanted, needed. 

"Don't worry. I am." Adam smirked. He grinned when Kris laughed. "I'll lead." 

"I'll follow. Just call me Ruth." Kris smiled up at Adam, wishing he could spend more time just looking at him -- his shirt was shiny, his pants were tight, his hair was doing that soft powderpuff thing that made Kris want to pet it and his makeup tonight had just a touch of glitter and looked amazing, but more than that, Adam looked... happy. Radiant, was that the word? Did he, was it possible that he made Adam that happy? He added with determination, "I'm totally willing to try if you don't mind me making a fool of myself when I'm with you. I could totally ruin your cool cred." 

"Have you ever seen some of the shit I pull on stage? Clearly, looking cool is not on the top ten list of things I worry about at 3am." Adam laughed and edged Kris toward the edge of the dance floor, glad the club was open so late on a Friday night that Kris had been able to work his shift and then come out to play.

"But what _do_ you worry about at 3am?" Kris asked, tugging on Adam's arm. Adam had spoken more than once about lying awake in the middle of the night. "I'd like to know." 

Usually it was about why he was alone at 3am, but Adam bit back the words fearful of sounding needy even though Kris looked more interested than pitying. Looking down into Kris' soft brown eyes, Adam realized he'd stopped worrying about being alone and last night had spent the time texting Lane asking her about how her mission was going. He was so going to owe her. He was so going to owe her. She was in _Arkansas_ for gawd's sakes. He shrugged. "Right now? I'm not happy with quite a few of the tracks on my album, so I'm usually thinking about my music or a video concept. I think I'm in a rut. I need some new ideas."

"You need to go some more new places, maybe. Get inspiration." 

"Inspire me, boy." Adam grabbed Kris and pulled him onto the dance floor. 

 

Inspired... Oh hell, yeah, Adam thought as Kris once again slid his hands down his back to rest on the top of his ass and pull him closer. He was going to be inspired after this to build a dance floor in his house just so he could dance with Kris in private and take this dance to its natural climax. 

 

"Ohhellno!" Kris gasped for breath when Adam tried to pull him into another dance. "I need a drink. Or a new set of lungs. Where do you get your stamina?" When Adam smirked, Kris said quickly, "I hope you can fuck as long as you can dance...Ohmigod!"

Adam laughed at the look of triumph, followed by surprise that flitted across Kris' features. He appeared to have no poker face at all. Thank god. Maybe he had really met someone real over thirty-eight cents at Starbucks. Shocking. "Are you shocked you said that?"

"I'll never tell." Kris squeezed Adam's arm and looked up at him with a smile. He'd shocked himself by having a great time. He shouldn't have doubted it -- he'd swear no one knew how to have a good time better than Adam. Plus Adam was a good dancer, his enjoyment was infectious and the way he grabbed Kris by the hips and moved him around, along, and against him... Kris grinned. Who wouldn't love dancing when it was vertical foreplay? "Mmm, maybe one more dance." 

Moving backwards, looking over his shoulder, Adam pulled a willing Kris back onto the dance floor. Smiling as Kris slid his hands up and down Adam's arms, Adam guided him, believing --at least for a moment, he told himself, just a moment -- that Kris was so focused on him he was a danger to the toes of others. As Kris moved closer, even though the dance was a fast tune, Adam hissed in a breath at the look of heat in Kris' eyes. Maybe.... more than a moment. 

Closing his eyes to get his bearings, Kris shook his head, hoping the dizziness would go away. They were surrounded by beautiful people, people in amazing outfits, people that looked too perfect to be real and probably weren't, given what he'd learned of folks' spending habits when it came to plastic surgery out here. And yet Adam had only looked away from him when someone greeted him. He was surprised no fans had grabbed at him but then again, this club was a little too cool, so although people were looking at Adam, they were probably trying to rack up cool points by not swarming a celebrity. Which meant, hopefully, no obnoxious jerk taking pictures, he decided and pulled Adam down, needing to kiss his lips.

"Oh yesss..." Adam whispered, forcing himself to pull back. "I need to tell Lane that my new house needs a dance floor." 

"Huh? Dance more?" Kris asked, his body still thrumming with need. "I need a drink, for real, this time before we dance some more." 

"I think you've earned that drink." Adam kept his arm around Kris and nodded toward the stairs leading to the VIP area. 

Kris looked away from Adam as he stopped at a table opposite the banquette seating where one of the four chairs was occupied by a woman who looked vaguely familiar. Smiling politely, he waited while Adam bent down and kissed the woman's cheek, laughing as she teased him about being sweaty. 

Putting his hand on her shoulder, he introduced them. "Dani, this is my date, Kris and this is my best friend, Danielle." 

"Oh! Hi." Kris smiled, then glanced up in alarm as Adam pointed to his left and walked over to the bar in back of the VIP area. Oh, hell, this was a test. A big one. Great, left alone with a stranger who was Adam's best friend and would probably beat his ass if he did anything stupid. He sat down with a thud, wiped his forehead, gulped and said quickly, "Adam's spoken of you." 

"And of you, Mr. Thirty-Eight Cents." 

Kris gasped in shock. "Seriously, he did not tell you that story!"

"Seriously, you need to know that the man has no filter." Danielle paused, hoping that was still true. Or rather, true _again._ Adam had grown so cautious in the last year around everyone but his closest circle. 

"Yeah, I've seen his interviews. Before, though, right? Nowadays, he's much more cautious. I knew that before I even met him. Over thirty-eight cents."

Danielle nodded slowly. How did he know-- "Oh, that's right. You're a fan." And an astute one. A very astute one. Was that good or bad? How did you _know_? Oh god, this made her head hurt worse than this loud music. Oh hell, no wonder Adam was careful these days. She looked toward the bar and bit her lip.

"Yeah. And isn't it better that I love his music rather than I hate it or don't care about it?"

"Great point." Danielle raised her glass in a mock toast to Kris. "To all of us finding more love in our lives."

"Are you single?" Kris asked, then looking into Danielle's face, sat back for a moment. "Or... did you recently meet someone and you're trying to decide if he's worth pursuing?"

Pulling back in surprise, Danielle stared intently at Kris. He was not only cute, he was either really perceptive or... really perceptive. "How did you know?"

Kris smiled crookedly. "I just had a feeling --" He touched his stomach. "Here, that you were in the same position I was in a while ago."

"And what did you decide?"

Kris leaned forward. "I let Adam pull me out on the dance floor so I could make a total fool of myself. What does it look like I decided?" He laughed, hopeful that no one had taken pictures of him dancing. 

"Adam's worth it," Danielle said quickly.

"Yeah, he is." Kris patted Danielle's hand. She was a good friend, who would probably gut him if he ever hurt Adam. So he'd just tell her the truth. "I figured that out before I finished the coffee or the muffins he bought me because he's afraid I don't eat enough." He flushed, then realized that Adam had probably told Dani that too and let it go, knowing that Adam was just a nice guy who worried about him. "If that. I may have made the decision before that..."

"And for the record, one, neither Adam nor I consider it shameful that you're having a hard time financially. Been there, done that. And second, you didn't make _any_ kind of fool of yourself," Danielle assured him. "I was watching. You can dance." 

"Oh no..." Kris moaned and covered his face with his hands, then peeked between his fingers. "Really?" 

"Really. You have rhythm. I'm sure Adam's relieved to know that." Danielle grinned at him, as he looked down and maybe, even, ohmigod, blushed? Good god, the guy was adorable. No wonder Adam was smitten. It didn't hurt that while they'd been dancing, Kris had looked at Adam as if he were the only person in the room, which was just what Adam needed. But what did this guy need? "When you were out there dancing. You looked...engrossed. Did you forget--"

"That I was in public? Hell, yeah. He's so...." Kris looked down. He wasn't really interested in talking about his feelings to someone he didn't know personally. "So, you met a guy?" 

"I met a guy." Danielle looked at Kris carefully. Kris was this odd mixture of assertive and easy-going, open and yet circumspect. No wonder Adam found him interesting. He _was_ interesting. 

"Has Adam met him yet? You two vet each other's potential significant others, don't you? Am I right?" Kris asked, his instincts screaming that it was true, that meeting Danielle was a test of some kind, one of many Adam felt compelled to put before him. Poor guy, he'd been tested too much himself. 

"Not yet. Adam's..." Danielle stopped talking and debated. Looking into Kris' soft brown eyes, she made a decision. "Adam is more cynical and suspicious these days."

"He has a right to be, doesn't he?" Kris sighed and glanced toward the bar, looking for Adam. He was looking intently and dubiously at some guy at the bar who was talking at him a mile a minute.

"Yes, unfortunately, he does."

Kris looked back at Dani and considered how he'd feel if his best friend had gone through that crap. "It must be hard to see someone you love get cynical and suspicious when that's not their nature." 

"True that." Danielle nodded. Either Kris was an actual nice guy who cared about others or the best damn actor ever or he'd been well-coached and -- okay, now she was getting totally paranoid. But still, just because you were paranoid... OMFG, she totally needed to apologize to Adam -- worrying about motivations like this just _sucked_. "So, did you come to LA to be an actor?"

Puzzled, Kris blinked and shook his head. "Why does everyone ask me that?" Who was that guy at the bar that looked like he was pissing Adam off? 

Danielled shrugged. "You're cute, plus skinny and short -- which is the body profile of most actors or wannabe actors in Hollywood."

"They're short?" Kris asked in surprise. "They look tall on screen." 

"Yeah. Totally. The first time Adam took me to a celebrity event, I couldn't believe it. I felt like I was Dorothy in Munchkinland. If you pay attention when Adam's on a red carpet, he towers over them."

"Maybe that's just an illusion caused by all the glitter he wears. Reflects and all. " 

Danielle laughed. "Could be. But then again, I'm not that tall and I'm often looking down on them." 

"Maybe it's all a plot so they can look at women's cleavages at eye level." Kris nodded. "Wait. Is cleavages a word?"

"Hmm, I don't know. Cleavage... cleavages..." 

"Well, this sounds like a fascinating conversation...." A deep voice drawled. Kris looked up with a frown. The blonde-haired man who'd been standing next to Adam at the bar was now next to him at their table. 

"So, Dani. You neglected to tell me you were dating anyone..." Adam said in an even tone, hoping his annoyance did not show. "Or that your anyone was a musician." 

Dani bit her lip. Adam was pissed at being out of the loop and probably had realized she had kept quiet to keep him from feeling left out while she was dating. "I take it you've already met Brian."

"I introduced myself at the bar." Brian smiled widely. 

"Oh, almost forgot." Adam smiled as he handed Kris his drink and Dani hers, nodding when they both thanked him. He glanced at Brian, wondering why he was buying Dani's drinks if she had a date here. He certainly didn't mind buying Dani a drink, but when you asked someone out, you were responsible for them, you paid for them. Period. Point against the guy. 

"Thanks!" Kris licked dry lips, before tilting the glass and draining it one long drink. "Sorry..." he smiled sheepishly up at Adam. "I worked up a thirst out there." 

"I'll get you another," Adam said immediately, wanting a second to consider this guy of Dani's. As well as the news Lane had texted him. So far, so good. But damn, she hated Arkansas. Uh-oh.

"So, Kris is a musician too," Dani told her date as Adam walked back to the bar. She glanced at him, knowing he would not like that Brian had not paid for her drink. Uh-oh. 

"Oh, really? What kind?" Brian asked

"A singer-songwriter. Or I've tried to be, not gotten anywhere. I've been trying to get a deal, but --"

"It's impossible without connections." Brian nodded. "Yeah, I've been in a band for a while, not going anywhere. But what I don't get is why Dani here -- who sings -- hasn't gone anywhere when Adam Lambert is her best friend."

"I've told you before..." Dani began. She liked Brian, a lot, but didn't like his persistent suggestions that Adam 'do something' for her career or his attitude that Adam's success meant he owed his friends anything. She understood his drive and his desperation, but still. "Adam has enough people trying to use his fame and connections. I'm his best friend, not his best coattail hanger-on-er." 

"Adam doesn't like people using him to further their careers," Kris said sharply. He had a feeling that Brian was the one gonna fail a test tonight. 

"No, Adam doesn't," Adam said, sitting down next to Kris on the banquette and handing Kris another drink, while Dani remonstrated her boyfriend. As Kris slid closer to him and patted him on his leg, Adam felt his shoulders release their tension. Giving a silent sigh, he relaxed and pressed against Kris' warm body. 

Seeing the way Adam leaned into Kris, Dani smiled. Adam appeared to have made up his mind about trusting Kris, even if he didn't really know that yet. And Kris looked like he wanted to crawl on top of Adam or maybe inside him, whichever would get him closer faster. 

Staring up at Adam, Kris said abruptly, "Your hair before we got dancing reminded me of my Gramma's powderpuff."

"Your Gramma's powderpuff?" Dani repeated, beginning to laugh. Adam had said Kris sometimes made the most random comments ever and he was right. 

"Yup." Kris grinned and raised up on one knee so that he could lightly pat Adam's hair. "It was like this. Bop, bop, bop. You could bop it and it would still pop right back up. Only the powder wasn't black."

"No?" Adam asked bemusedly as he looked up at Kris. That last drink must have gone right to his head. 

"Naw. The powder was pinky peachy." Kris sat down with a plop, nearly on top of Adam, then leaned in and took a long sniff. "But you don't smell like her."

"That's... good?" Adam looked over at Dani, who was quietly laughing into her drink, then put her glass down to whisper, 'So cute' at him. Adam nodded.

"Well, yeah." Kris rolled his eyes. "Not like I'd want to get a hard-on over something that smelled like my Gramma. That's sick and creepy. But your makeup... and by the way, I don't know if you care, but your make-up is almost all gone." 

"Oh?" Adam touched his face and looked at his finger, hoping Kris wasn't about to say that he was relieved to see the make up was gone. "I suppose so. Do you..."

Kris leaned up and kissed Adam's lips, seeing the question in his eyes. "I liked you bare-faced and with bug spray on in the woods. And I liked you tonight with tight-as-hell jeans and glitter eye make up. Either look, I like." He ran his finger down the open neck of Adam's shirt and flicked his finger at Adam's necklace. "I'd like you better naked except for this necklace, though..." 

 

"I don't like him," Adam blurted out as they stood at the railing of the VIP balcony and watched Danielle dance with her new boyfriend. He felt awful. She had just given him the thumbs up on Kris and he hadn't, couldn't, wouldn't do the same for her boyfriend. Yet, hopefully. Maybe he'd improve upon continued exposure... 

"Me neither." Kris glared at the guy as he danced with Adam's friend. "Not one bit." He had a bad feeling about the guy. He drank from his latest glass, set it down on a nearby table and rubbed his hair nervously, hoping the drink would give him enough courage to go back on the dance floor now that he knew Dani was nearby, watching. 

Adam affectionately patted Kris' hair down while heaving a sigh of relief. "Thank god. I thought I was being paranoid."

"You? _Never_!" Kris grinned as Adam swatted his arm. "Nope. Just observant. Notice how he kept--"

"Looking at other women when Danielle wasn't paying attention." 

"Rude." Kris slid his finger through Adam's belt loop and pulled him away from the railing and spying on his friend. Adam steered them back toward the banquettes, which Kris was glad to see was empty except for a bored bartender. Good, cuddle time, he decided and angled his shoulder into Adam's side until Adam put his arm around him. 

"Very rude," Adam agreed as he looked down at Kris' hand on his thigh, then raised his eyes to see Kris staring up at him. Was it his imagination or was Kris really always _looking_ at him? He remembered Geoffrey's comments in the restaurant and decided he wasn't fooling himself this time and bent to brush a kiss against the upturned lips. 

"It's one thing to notice other people, but it's another to ..." Kris squinted his eyes and twisted his mouth as he looked at Adam in a sidelong glance.

"Leer." Adam burst out laughing at Kris' expression.

"Is that what I was doing?" Kris asked.

"You were trying. You're not really a leer-er." 

"And I'm not a lemur either." Kris laughed at his own joke. 

"But you are a little drunk," Adam said. 

Kris shrugged. "That's okay. I'm with you. You'll take care of me. Which doesn't mean I didn't notice all the people leering at you and you ignoring them." 

Adam shook his head. "They're just seeing the haze of fame, not me." 

"Puh-leeze..." Kris slid his hand up the length of Adam's thigh. 

"It didn't really happen before Idol and fame, Kris." 

"Really? Well, there is such a thing as mass stupidity. Look at the people who've voted for Sarah Palin if you need an example. But I think you just didn't notice." Kris slowly looked Adam up and down and shook his head. "You must not be part... partic... particularly ob.... Screw it. Like I said, you just didn't notice." 

"No, I--" Adam broke off as Kris stood suddenly and plopped himself down on Adam's lap. He grinned and wrapped his arm around Kris' hips to hold him in place. "Well, hi there, handsome." 

"Is that a Bedazzler in your pants or are you glad to see me?" Kris asked as he wiggled around on Adam's lap.


	12. Define slutty for me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is rated NC-17.

**Chapter 12**

"Well, hi there, handsome." 

"Is that a Bedazzler in your pants or are you glad to see me?" Kris asked as he wiggled around on Adam's lap. 

Busy cracking up, Adam belatedly remembered to look around, relieved to see the bartender was busy flirting with a buxom cocktail waitress. Thank god boobs were always such a distraction for straight guys, he thought as Kris kissed his neck. Once again tightening his hold on Kris, he groaned, "Good lord, you get demonstrative when you drink." 

"And tend to blurt out embarrassing shit. Honest shit. But I'm glad you didn't notice the leer-ers in the past..." Kris kissed his way up Adam's neck, then licked the outer curve of Adam's ear. "Because you were available for me... which blows my mind. You're the hottest guy on the planet. Like I said before." Kris pulled back to poke Adam in the shoulder, then smoothed both hands over Adam's chest. Looking up into Adam's stunned eyes, he asked, "Weren't you listening? Or can't you hear when someone tells you a truth that doesn't jive with your beliefs about yourself?"

"Holy. Fucking. Shit." Adam stared down at Kris in shock. "What a question."

"Well, you gonna answer it?" Kris asked, staring up into Adam's eyes, dark-rimmed but nonetheless alight with pleasure and thought. He could practically see the man's mind whirring with ideas and thankfully none of them seemed to be along the lines of 'Who do you think you are?' because day-um, if he had overstepped at this point...

Feeling the warmth and weight of Kris in his arms, leaning against him, Adam looked in return down into Kris' face, watching him bite his lip nervously, then straighten his spine -- or try to, given that he was tipsy. 

As a smile tilted up Adam's lips, Kris relaxed against Adam's chest. "Take your time. I've got all night. Although...if I have all night, I hope we do more than talk. You know?" When Adam lifted a hand to brush against Kris' lips, he nipped at the fingertips, laughing when Adam pulled them back. "I'm waiting for the answer. And don't start with some answer about perception and rela...rela... relativity!" Kris grinned, glad he'd been able to spit out that word given how his head was spinning. "Answer me. Do you close your ears when someone tells you a truth you don't want to hear?" 

His fingers still stinging from Kris' bite, Adam considered the question again, more intrigued now by the fact that Kris had asked it, demanded an answer actually, than in the contents of the question itself. Was that his version of honest? That was beyond honest, that was something a star fucker would never say or do. That had been real, honesty straight from the heart and right into his own. "That's quite the challenge."

"Well. Am I right? I _am_ right. You believe you're still in your awkward phase, when you're soooooo not..." Kris lifted his hand and let his index finger gently stroke along Adam's eyebrow, then down his nose, and over the top curve of his lip. "You're beautiful. And you have the most ridiculously perfect nose and your mouth... so hot. I've had dreams about that mouth." 

"I..." As he stared into Kris' earnest eyes, Adam felt warmth spread not from Kris' hand but up from some place deep inside. "Thank you. Very much. You're sweet."

"I'm honest. Especially when I'm a little drunk." Kris shrugged. "And I've said that before about you being the hottest guy on the planet, when I was undrunk..."

"When? You didn't say it to me." 

"Oh?" Kris willed his sluggish brain to think through the competing haze of alcohol and lust. When had he talked about Adam's body image issues, talked, not listened? It had been... "Lane! I said you were fucking hot the day we met in Starbucks. She can tell you. I don't tell lies." 

"Well!" Adam made a mental note. "I'll have to punish her for withholding that information." Then again, sending her to Arkansas was probably sufficient punishment for a lifetime of sins. 

"Make her deal with Jacob." 

"Ooh, you have an evil streak in you, Kris Allen." Adam grinned and tightened his arm around Kris' hips. "I like that in a boy."

"Would you like to be _in_ this boy?" Kris asked as he pressed his butt more firmly into Adam's crotch. He gasped softly as he felt the hardness under him. "You don't have to answer, the glambulge speaks loudly enough." Kris deliberately wiggled his ass on Adam's lap, having already figured out that Adam had a thing for that. 

"You bitch." 

"Me? I'm not the one testing you...." Kris groaned and bit his lip. "Oops."

"Oops?" Adam frowned. He had been testing Kris. And that was... wrong. "I'm sorry--"

"No. I am. Should not have said that."

"I shouldn't be _doing_ that--"

"It's okay." Kris levered himself to sit up and kissed Adam's cheek, then settled back against Adams' chest. Feeling the hard _thudthudthud_ of Adam's heart against his ribs, he patted Adam's chest soothingly. "I understand. Once bitten, all that stuff. There's this guy who came into the bar..." He paused. "Do you wanna hear this story?"

"Sure. I like your bar stories." Adam hugged Kris close, then stroked his hand over Kris' soft hair. Thank god he was so easy-going. Another guy would have busted his chops for testing him. He needed an easy-going guy. Or that's what his mother had told him the last, oh, forty-two times she urged him to relax and date again. 

"That's because you're like me -- you think people are interesting." Kris smiled and wiggled around, trying to get closer to Adam. He was just so warm. "You're interesting. You're...sweet and hot... like a Cuban sandwich."

"I'm like a Cuban sandwich?" Adam repeated. If he didn't know of Kris' penchant for the world's most random comments, he'd be convinced that he was the drunk one. Bending down and rubbing his cheek against Kris', he whispered, "You're the one who is worth eating." 

"So....This guy. He was married to this woman and she cheated on him. He came home and found them in his bed. He threw her out. Threw out the bed too. So... he spent the next few months trying to find a new bed. There was something wrong with every single bed."

"So...what did he do?"

"Bought a futon." 

Adam laughed. "That is so not how I thought that story was going to go." 

"Can we go?" Kris jumped to his feet and pulled on Adam's hand. "I wanna make out with you in the car." 

"Mmm, maybe we can do better than the car," Adam said as he caught the bartender's attention and made a motion indicating starting a car.

Kris stared at Adam in confusion. Apparently he'd passed some test he hadn't even known he was taking...

"Or maybe..." Adam leaned down to whisper in Kris' ear. "You've just discovered my weakness is for gorgeous guys wiggling their butt in my lap while looking up at me ...just..." He bent his head and kissed Kris' eager mouth, forcing himself to pull back only because they were in public. "Like that." 

 

"So how did Danielle's boyfriend get your back up before you even came over to the table?" Kris asked, his head clearing slightly as they rode in the back seat of the taxi back to his apartment. He had to keep talking or he'd give Adam a blowjob in the taxi and _for sure_ that would make it onto some gossip website. Probably with pictures. 

Adam arched an eyebrow at the realization that Kris had read his mood so clearly. How the hell had he met this guy in a random Starbucks on a random day? 'Thank you, universe' he said silently, as he reached out and took Kris' hand in his. "His questions about the business. I mean, he introduced himself and then _immediately_ started pumping me--"

"Hey!" Kris scowled. "That's my job. Or..." He turned to glare at Adam. "Will be one day, if you ever ..." He trailed off and felt his heart sink into his stomach. Nervously, he began to play with Adam's rings while wondering what the hell was wrong with himself. 

"If I ever what?" Adam asked, curious to know what Kris had been about to say. 

"Nuthin'." 

"Okay."

"You're letting me off that easy?"

"I'll find ways of making you tell me once we're in private." Adam smiled as Kris looked up at him, slightly befuddled either from drinking or trying to ascertain if he should be excited or scared. 

"I..." Swallowing hard, Kris looked up. Seeing the warmth and amusement in Adam's eyes, he tried again. "I guess... I just wanna know..." He trailed off, wondering how to say it...

Adam nodded as he decided what Kris -- apparently in one of his shy modes -- was too afraid to ask. "Oh. I'm not dating anyone else. We're exclusive." Seeing the concern still in Kris' eyes, Adam squeezed Kris' hand. "I'm somewhat single-minded when I'm focused. I don't really date around date around once I have someone in my sights. And believe me, you're in my sights."

The warmth in Adam's eyes was like one of his hugs, Kris thought as he smiled and relaxed. Good enough, for now. Later... "Ah, so you're the hunter and I'm the prey?" 

"You asked me out the first two times," Adam reminded Kris, keeping his voice low. "So maybe you're the hunter."

"Mebbe. Sometimes. Nowadays." Once again playing with Adam's rings, Kris nodded. "Yeah, guess I was with you. But...I got what I wanted. _You_. And I hope..." 

"I want you, so that's all good. Stop fretting about it. I'll let you know if there's a problem -- believe me!" Adam laughed. "That filterless thing -- that's me in private life definitely."

"That's good. I like knowing where I stand. It's easier." 

"And for the record, I don't get off on having multiple partners at the same time. According to some people I know, I am disgustingly middle-class in my monogamy."

"Except for when you've slutted around," Kris teased as he relaxed now that the crisis was averted, then blushed. "Like I should talk." 

"Indeed. So tell me, Elmer..."

"Elmer?" Kris wrinkled his nose. He really shouldn't drink, like at all, if he wanted to keep up with Adam's leaping thought processes. "I'm not getting it." 

"Elmer - the hunter who was always after Bugs Bunny?"

"You're not serious." Kris shook his head. "You can _not_ call me Elmer. Elmer is my old friend Cletus' grandfather who chewed tobacco and spat on the ground all the time. So no way are you going to call me Elmer--"

"Cletus? Chewed tobacco. Spat it on the ground. Seriously? Ohmigod..." Adam began to laugh at the thought of Lane talking to these people. Lane was going to _kill_ him. 

 

"Bloody hell!" Lane gasped as she woke up in the darkened motel room for the fifth time that night and looked around. "I'm still in Arkansas. No wonder Kris says his life is in LA now. Dorothy wouldn't have wanted to come home to Kansas if Kansas had been _Ar_ kansas." She flung her arm over her eyes and groaned loudly. Perhaps if she groaned loudly enough, Adam would hear her. He certainly owed her a bloody bonus. That was it. Grinning, she grabbed for her phone to text him, then wiped her eyes and peered at the phone as its screen registered a bank transaction. A few moments later, she slapped her hand on the phone. "Damn it, Adam! You went and gave me a bonus before I could even yell at you for sending me here!"

 

Hopefully that bonus would partially mollify her. But Lane's aggravation would be worth it because Kris was so damn worth it. He hoped. Maybe he'd have Skingraft make her a custom jacket. That would do it. Who could resist a leather jacket? Flicking an glance towards the cab driver, Adam urged in a low tone, "Distract me with tales of your slutty period and maybe I'll forget about it. But speak softly. Elmer." 

"Aw geez!" Kris laughed. "Okay, so...I... uh... C'mon! You know!"

"I know how _I_ went about slutting around, but I'm dying to know how _you_ did. So...I know! Start with something simple. Numbers. How often did you go out... hunting? And for how long? Tell me. Elmer."

"I... C'mon...." Kris whined, knowing Adam would not give up. And that he'd give in and spill the beans. But it was fun to drag out the process. On this matter, anyway. Then again, ever since he'd walked into Starbucks, he'd been having fun. 

"C'mon. This is easy. You take the number of weeks you did it and multiply that by the number of guys per week and that's your total. Elmer." 

"I thought you sucked at math."

"Algebra. Not multiplication. Oh, and cocks. Elmer." 

"I think I'm a little too drunk to multiply."

"Your phone has a calculator. Elmer."

"It does, but I left it at home again."

"Why the hell do you have that phone?" Adam rolled his eyes. "Well, I can do it for you. So fess up. But speak softly. Elmer." 

"I'm gonna smack you in the--" Kris gasped when Adam reached out and grabbed his hands firmly. He pulled back but was unable to get free. Damn, that was hot. 

"Then just tell me. Quietly. Elmer." 

Licking his lips while staring at the hands restraining him, Kris said absently, "Okay, already! Once or twice a week for about mebbee two months." 

"Seriously?" Adam grinned, holding in laughter only because Kris looked so serious. "You are not serious." 

"Are you laughing at me?" Kris glared and pulled his hand free to irritably rub his hair as Adam chuckled.

"I hate to break it to you, Hedgehog..." Adam gently patted down Kris' hair. "But that's not all that slutty."

"It is too!"

"Not really--"

"Was too! I was a _slut_!" Kris exclaimed loudly. As the words echoed around the taxi, he slapped his hand over his mouth. He groaned as Adam and the heretofore silent cab driver both burst out laughing. 

Adam leaned forward and spoke to the chortling cab driver, who might one day be interviewed by Billy Bush on 'Lambert's Latest Fling!" "No, he's not."

The cabbie nodded. "Yeah. Doesn't look the type." 

"What does that mean?" Kris asked, now glaring at the cabbie. Humph. _He_ looked a like middle-aged dad. What did he know? 

"Son, you look like... my son. I can see it in your eyes. Nice boy, plays ball, Boy Scout. Plus you look like you wear plaid shirts when you're not out clubbing in someone else's clothes." The cabbie paused as Adam broke into loud laughter and Kris pouted. "You just don't have the slutty look and lemme tell ya, I drive a cab in WeHo. I know from slutty." 

"I could look slutty!" Kris protested loudly, then flushed at the looks of amusement on Adam's face and that of the cabby, before the cabby began swearing at a driver in front of them as he made the turn onto Kris' street. 

Adam leaned back. Oh my Ra, Kris was never boring. "Do tell. How would you look slutty?"

"I.. I..." Kris stammered. He had no idea, but Adam looked so good leaning back there in the seat like that, all he'd have to do is lean over and unzip those pants and yummm... Seeing Adam's smirk, Kris frowned. Oh hell. Adam was waiting because Adam was going to talk him to death again. "I... could wear a shirt open to my waist!"

"Hmm. That can be a tough look to carry off properly. Is it slutty or rock star or lazy or a bad homage to the 1970s?" Adam shook his head. "How do you do it right?"

"I dunno!" Kris bit his lip to keep from laughing as the taxi drew up to his apartment, not wanting the night to end. "Are you going to tell me?"

"No. It's your turn to talk." After they got out, Adam paid the driver and waved him off, noting Kris' surprised expression. Putting his hand on the small of Kris' back, he guided him inside. "Okay. How about your bottoms -- I mean..." Adam drawled with a raised eyebrow. "Your pants. What is your idea of slutty bottoms? I mean, pants?" He asked as they began walking up the stairs, Kris in front of him. Because he wasn't stupid. Staring at Kris' ass was a good idea. Damn good idea. One of his best. But this was even better...

"Tight. Tight, right?" Kris nodded, then jumped as Adam squeezed his ass from behind.

"Yeah, tight works," Adam agreed, glad and amazed that Kris had worn the jeans the photo shoot stylist had 'given' him for free when she'd 'mistakenly' brought along the wrong size for Adam. Once again, he owed Lane, that time for running out to buy the clothes and giving the stylist the plotline for the day. Sliding his hand inbetween Kris' legs, Adam squeezed lightly, laughing when Kris jumped. "Oh yeah, tight works for me." 

"You jerkface!" Kris laughed even as his cock hardened to hurting. He looked back over his shoulder. "I totally could have fallen."

"I would have caught you. So what else?" Adam pushed Kris' butt, urging him up the stairs. And copping a feel in the process, because he had time because apparently _now_ the boy was taking his time? 

"My... Jeans. They have to be tight and... maybe ripped?"

"You tell me. You're the slut." Adam grinned as Kris paused to push his butt back into Adam's hands and wiggle it. "Although FYI, ripped jeans do provide easier access."

"I'll buy me some ripped jeans!" Kris smiled back. Reaching the landing, Kris pulled Adam along as they walked down the hall to Kris' apartment door. They needed to get inside soon or he was going to just suck Adam off right here. "But that's not enough, is it? Jewelry, right? I need jewelry. Maybe.. an earring. Or..." Kris poked Adam's chest. "I know! A nipple ring!"

"Okay, that _would_ be slutty." Adam looked down at Kris' chest in the tight tee-shirt. Something else the stylist had brought along in the wrong size for Adam. He could totally get into Kris having a nipple ring that would show through a tee-shirt. But right now, he'd be satisfied if he could get into Kris' apartment as Kris struggled with the door. They needed to get inside before he sucked Kris off in the hallway. He nodded when Kris kicked the door in frustration and took the key. He shoved it hard inside the look, jiggled it, then forced the door open. 

"Good slutty or bad slutty?" Kris asked, licking his lips as Adam seemed to open the door with more brute force than finesse. 

"What's the difference?" Adam looked at Kris, dying to know how Kris divided slutty into good and bad. 

"Honestly, don't you know?" Kris looked at Adam incredulously as he stumbled into the apartment. "Fine. _I'll_ tell _you_ , Mr. _Experienced!_ "

"Okay, Hedgehog. Do educate me." Adam bit his lip to keep from laughing as he walked into the tiny studio apartment. OMFG, Kris was so damn cute. 

"Pay attention here, _Sweetie_. Bad slutty is when you're doing something to attract the notice of any guy 'cause any guy will do or if you're screwing around on a partner. Good slutty is when your boyfriend, partner, whatever, likes a certain... look for the purposes of... having a good time and you wear it to please him." Kris paused, then nodded. "Yup, that's it."

"Ah." Adam nodded as he flicked on the light switch. "I really should make a note of this in my Kris Allen dictionary." 

"Kris Allen dictionary?" Kris parroted as he slammed the door behind him, then gasped as Adam turned him around to face him and took his mouth in a hard kiss, that deepened instantly as they both tried to get closer and closer. 

Adam groaned as Kris wrapped his arms around Adam's neck and began undulating up against him while humming. He pulled back to look at Kris' face. "Yeah. Like how your definition of not being able to dance is..." He ducked down and bit Kris' bottom lip, then soothed it with a slow slide of his tongue. "Wrong."

"Is it?" Kris heard his voice get higher when Adam cupped his ass and pulled Kris up against him. Automatically, he wiggled closer still and rubbed himself up against Adam's long body, feeling the heat and tension on every muscle. 

"Yeah. In fact..." Adam hissed in a breath as Kris rubbed his hip along Adam's cock. He'd done that on the dance floor, but now they were alone and life was good. "I'd define the way you dance as good slutty."

"Hmm. The Adam Lambert Dictionary. But in my dictionary, the way you moved your hips tonight was beyond slutty, it was like sex. Which maybe... Well...this dancing thing..." Curling his hands around Adam's biceps for balance, Kris lifted his chin to lick at the damp divot of Adam's neck. "With you... Always before, I felt stupid. Awkward. No rhythm. But with you... I dunno. It's different. Maybe because it's you and you were moving me around, leading me. It's like vertical foreplay." 

"Is that what you were thinking tonight at one point?" Adam asked, remembering a look that had passed over Kris' face. 

"You betcha..." Kris murmured, his teeth nipping at the warm skin of Adam's neck while rubbing his body against Adam's. He shifted, spread his legs and began grinding down on Adam's left thigh, biting harder when Adam's hands on his ass tightened and pushed him down harder and he felt something inside him just... release. "This is what I wanted to do while we were dancing." 

"This is what I wanted to do on the dance floor..." Adam whispered, his hands reaching for the hem of Kris' shirt and pulling it off in one fast flash of fabric. He tossed it towards the world's ugliest chair, then put his hands back on Kris' back, pulling him closer, eager to feel the soft skin over tight muscles under his hands. As Kris rubbed against him, he ran his hands around Kris' body, pausing to pinch the nipples. 

Feeling Kris freeze and moan while his cock hardened against Adam's thigh, Adam moved his hands to Kris' jeans, the sound of the zipper loud in the room, silent except for the sounds of the city outside. He slid his hands inside the jeans, squeezing Kris' ass, the shoved the jeans down, pausing. "Hey, no underwear?"

"See?!" Kris grinned triumphantly. 

"Your mother told you to never do that in case you got into an accident and had to go to the hospital, right?" Adam surmised by the combination of shock and smugness on Kris' face.

"How..." Kris grinned. "Well, it was a risk." But judging by the heat in Adam's eyes, taking the risk had been worth it. "Told you I was a slut."

"Words are cheap. Mr. Thirty-eight cents. Show me--" Adam sucked in a breath when Kris bent forward as he pulled off his jeans and shoes and bit Adam's thigh through his own pants. "Okay, yeah, that'll work...." He trailed off as Kris -- naked Kris and oh hell yes! -- rubbed his hands up Adam's leg. "Oh yeah, this is what I wanted--" he began, reaching for Kris. 

"And this is what I wanted to do while I was watching your hips move and feeling that big cock of yours pressing against me while we danced..." Kris whispered back, dropping to his knees and reaching for the button on the top of Adam's black jeans. Oh yeah, he wanted to do this with Adam's clothes on. Totally pervy. There was something about Adam that just made him feel free to move in new directions, knowing that Adam wouldn't judge him and would hold him close if he went too far. He looked up at Adam, who grinned at him and nodded. 

"Go ahead," Adam urged, sensing Kris wanted or needed permission, that this aggression was new for him. Unzipping his own jeans, Adam told him, "I want you too. And I want you to do whatever you want." What _did_ Kris want?

"Good. I want your cock in my mouth," Kris blurted out, this time brushing Adam's hands aside impatiently, as he reached into to free the hard cock he'd wanted all night. He licked his lips as he saw the wetness already on the tip. "For me, isn't it? Oh yeah. Come to me. Move like when you were dancing."

By all the gods! Adam thought as his brain nearly short-ciruited from the sexy husky tone of Kris' voice alone. "You're making me craaazy..." He groaned as Kris looked up at him just before opening his mouth and sucking the head inside the wet heat. Laying both hands on Kris' head, he gently moved his hips, hearing the needy noises he was making or was it Kris or the both of them or... ? Who cared? Oh god, he couldn't think... not now, his body taking over and oh fuckity fuck he had to get control because Kris wasn't experienced enough to take it all, although.... 

He had to, Kris thought, as he dove back onto Adam's cock, he had to give Adam, he needed from Adam, he just wanted.... He tilted his head back as Adam tugged on the hair at the nape of his neck, then looked up into his eyes, seeking approval. 

Damn. Was Kris trying to prove something? Or needing something. Adam pushed Kris' head forward with one hand, using the other to rub his cock along Kris' lower lip, then the upper. Taking a breath as Kris parted those darkened lips and sucked him in, Adam said huskily, "You wanted to look slutty before, didn't you? You look so slutty right now with your mouth wrapped around my cock, your lips so red and puffy already, there, that tongue sliding around the head... 

"Mine..." Kris moaned, curling one hand around the base of Adam's cock, wanting to make this moment last, when their desire made a circle of increasing heat around them. 

Adam groaned as the sound of Kris' voice vibrated against his over-sensitzed flesh, before Kris took him inside again, the sound vibrating against and enclosing his cock in yet another sensory explosion. As Kris looked up at him again, his eyes dark and his cock rising up, Adam struggled to keep control. 

"Krissss...." He groaned again as he watched Kris push his cock upward to give a long lick up from his balls to the head of his cock, clenching his hands into fists against Kris' shoulders to keep from pushing hard into Kris' mouth. 

"Go ahead. Fuck my mouth. I think I can take it all tonight," Kris urged, laving his tongue against the hot hardness against his lips. "God, I love how big you are. Such a fucking turn on." Licking at the head, Kris "You're gonna stretch me out, you know."

"Oh fuck...." Adam moaned. "When you talk like that..."

"You like it..." Kris practically purred in satisfaction, having hard evidence... heh... hard evidence in the tightening of Adam's cock in his mouth that Adam liked his dirty talk. "See, I am slutty enough." 

Adam laughed. He couldn't believe it. He was laughing in the middle of a blow job. If that wasn't happiness, he didn't know what was. "You don't need to be slutty, just yourself. What happened to that nice small-town church-going boy?" 

"Screw that. I've never felt more myself than with you. Or happier or more turned on than with your cock in my face. But I'd bet it'd feel better up my--" 

"Get sucking." Adam growled, tapping Kris' jaw. "Be a slut for _me_."

Damn, Adam was hot when he was bossy. And how did Adam know what Kris wanted, anyway? "That's what I want. Exactly what I want." That's what he needed to be, to do. Licking his lips eagerly, Kris immediately followed Adam's orders and engulfed Adam in his mouth, eagerly meeting the thrusts of his hips, sucking him back as far as he could, while moving one hand down to his own cock. 

"Do not jerk yourself off this time!" Adam ordered, bending over to tug at Kris' arm and slam his hand back on Adam's leg. "I want to taste your come in my mouth tonight."

"Damn! Then stop saying stuff like that!" Kris said in a deepened voice as he felt his balls pull up against his body. "Because day-ummn. Hurry up."

Laughing again, Adam's chuckle turned into a gasp as Kris met the rhythm he was setting and together they moved faster and faster in a dance that sent both their heads spinning until Adam jerked forward, crying out, his hands tightening on Kris as Kris swallowed frantically. 

"Oh god, sweet again.... And... Hurryuphurryuphurryup!" Kris licked his lips as he frantically pulled at Adam's jeans. "Get naked. I need to--"

"Okay okay. I'm coming. Or rather..." Adam grinned as he sat down in the mushroom chair to pull off his boots, then shucked his jeans. At least if he was sitting in the chair, he wasn't looking at it straight on. "I already did, but..." Tugging his shirt off, he flung it over his head. "Get over here, boy. Oh!" Adam laughed as he looked forward and saw that his field of vision was filled with the sight of a very cute, very aroused man. 

"I'm here." Kris nearly bounced on his feet as Adam shifted forward on the chair and reached out for him. 

"Hang on until it's over..." Adam grinned as he pulled Kris forward with one hand on his ass, the other shoving his legs apart. 

Moments later, Kris dug his fingers into the chair, holding on as his legs began to shake. Now he knew... when Adam put all that focus of his into... "Oh god, oh yeah... your mouth, where didyoulearnwhocaresjustdon'tstopminenowohAdammmm....." Kris heard his keening cry echo around the apartment as Adam's mouth did things that he could call licking and sucking, but were somehow way more than just technique when all that intensity was focused on making you feel good. 

So. Damn. Good. And the look in Adam's eyes, talk about eye fucking and oh hell, he was gonna lose it, not yetnotyet .... And then that thing... Kris moved his hands to Adam's shoulders and squeezed hard, then stood on tip toe, pushing deeper into the wet sucking heat of Adam's mouth that was twisting him deeper, twisting, making his head spin. What the hell was that?

Sucking Kris' cock deep into his throat, Adam twisted his mouth one way, then the other, looked up and then swallowed. Then did it again. 

"What the actual fuck was that?!" Kris shrieked as he stared down at Adam in shock. "Do it again! Please?"

_plop_

Pulling his mouth off of Kris' dick with a wet sound, Adam slowly licked the head. "You want more?"

"I want more, but I don't think I can take more," Kris said honestly. "Adam, I..."

"You can take it. And you will." Sucking his finger deep into his mouth to wet it, Adam slowly pulled it out, watching Kris watch him with a nearly drugged look of desire in his eyes. "Spread your legs further for me. Do it right now."

"Yes." Kris nodded and moved his feet obediently, holding his breath as Adam's hand swiftly slid between his legs and unerringly found his hole. 

"You're going to be so sweet for me, aren't you? You're going to pull me inside you and just hold me there, aren't you?" Adam asked in a whisper feeling Kris move eagerly against his circling finger. "So hungry, aren't you? I know, because I am too..." Adam whispered before bending his head and taking Kris inside in one long stroke of tongue and sucking mouth. 

Crying out, he lost his voice as Adam's other hand pulled his cock up and Adam's mouth sank down on it just as Adam's fingertip opened him up. He fought to find the rhythm, then as Adam's hand tightened around his cock, he gasped and groaned and gave up, allowing Adam to lead him down another path as his body raced toward the goal, his hands moving from the chair to Adam's shoulders, then into his hair as he surrendered to the heat that had sparked into a fire and overtook him, spilling into Adam's mouth with a loud cry. 

"Oh. My. God." Kris stared at Adam, then sank down on him, straddling his thighs while aftershocks rippled through his body. "All I can say is Oh. My. God. Holy. Shit." He moaned and collapsed against Adam's chest, breathing heavily, belatedly realizing Adam's warm hands on his bare back. Mmm.... nice, he though drowsily as he nearly fell asleep. Adam knew what he was doing, for sure, but there was something more than technique in those hand and that mouth. Something in the way he moved... He sighed and wiggled deeper into Adam's warm embrace. 

"We should've done _that_ sooner," Adam admitted as he felt Kris kissing his shoulder. Kris was... just.... Adam turned his head and nudged Kris' face up, pressing his lips to Kris', needing to feel and taste the heat and sweetness that was Kris. Ah, yesssss... was all he could manage to think as Kris opened for his lips and softly searching tongue, meeting him just where and when and how... How had this happened? 

"You're...warm and sweet and hot..." Smiling against Adam's bare shoulder, Kris kissed it, then kissed it again, wishing he could kiss all those freckles, the bronze freckles that matched his chair and... really, he could fall asleep just like this, the warmest he'd been since he moved here because... _this_ was real comfort. "Plus, you're the best chair ever." 

"You are going to let me buy you a new chair."

"Whaaat?" Kris lifted his head and looked at Adam, seeing his beautiful face, freckles showing, against the backdrop mottled orange mushroom chair. He'd never forget, didn't want to forget. So... "Nope."

"You are. Because this chair is a fucking affront to my eyes. It is the fucking ugliest chair in the fucking universe." Adam slapped at a particularly offensive orange mushroom. 

Kris blinked, then burst out laughing. "You're using the word fucking a lot. That's because you need to be fucking me and you know it."

Adam grinned. Seeing the sleepiness in Kris' eyes, he smoothed Kris' hair down and gently cupped his cheek. "What I know is that it's now time to go to bed. Let's get out your mattress."

"Okay, first of all, I can't believe you're not tired. Guys are supposed to be tired and Second of all. You're... gonna stay here? Over night?" Kris was incredulous, but stood up instantly before Adam could change his mind. Given what Adam had told him before, staying over tonight would be the first time Adam had let himself sleep with a man since the infamous night of the unflattering dick pic. That was a gift of trust, he knew. 

"I am. Get out your mattress while I..." Adam paused while pulling on his underwear. Looking at Kris apologetically, he admitted, "This is stupid, I know, but I... I'm not ready to sleep totally naked with anyone yet. I trust you, but..." 

"Oh no big deal. That's okay. I understand." Kris touched Adam's back, rubbing his hand up and down the long muscled length of it. "I get it -- learning to trust again takes a long time."

"You're right. And thank you."

"That's okay. It's easy for me to get -- I'm in that position too. After what happened in Arkansas, it's taken me a while to learn how to let people in again.. So thank you for letting me learn how to do that with you. No one better than you..." Kris smiled absently as he stood up and walked over to the air mattress propped against the wall near the window. "But in case you were wondering, I'm willing to let you in. Any way you want. On your timeline."

"I think I need to give serious consideration to hurrying it up..." Adam murmured to himself as he caught sight of Kris' reflection in the darkened window and saw the happiness in his face. Kris didn't realize Adam could see him and in the reflection, Adam knew he saw truth. Kris looked satisfied and happy. Just happy. Although there was nothing "just" about happiness. Standing up, Adam helped Kris wrestle the mattress to the floor and looked over at him. "I think my timeline is getting shorter and shorter... "

 

"I cannot get out of here soon enough!" Lane growled under her breath as she gave up trying to sleep and looked at the clock on the nightstand. "This it it. I'm counting the hours down."


	13. Decisions, decisions...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is rated R/NC-17.

**Chapter 13: Decisions, decisions...**

 

Waiting for her breakfast appointment and drinking enough coffee to float a canal boat, Lane put her ear buds in and alternately smiled and frowned as she listened to the interviews she'd conducted. She shook her head as everyone from Kris' mother to his friends described him as easygoing to a fault, prone to avoiding conflict, hating to fight or declining to push himself forward unless forced, as by his father's ultimatum. The Kris Allen she knew and that Hannah and Geoffrey had interviewed was still easy going, but also knew when to push. Plus, she'd seen and Adam talked about how Kris seemed to revel in the silly fights the two of them had for their own entertainment -- a characteristic no one in Gopher Flats had mentioned. Oh well, time and life change everyone. That is, she thought, as she whistled in relief as her appointment finally showed up, life changes those who are not so blind they cannot see.

 

Turning toward the window, Adam chuckled to himself when Kris grumbled in his sleep at the shifting position and then rubbed his nose against Adam's shoulder before finding a spot he apparently liked. Lying on top of Adam once again. Adam kissed Kris' messy hair and looked unseeingly at the horizontal streaks of yellowish light shining through the slats of the cheap plastic white mini-blinds. Kris had mentioned once that he did not sleep well, but last night Adan had been the one lying awake for long stretches and not just at three am and not because he was wondering why he was alone. No. 

And he wasn't awake just because of Kris' apparent night-time genetic mutation when he transformed into a clinging vine. No, to that too. He smiled down at Kris, then looked toward the window again, noting that from the way the light was now hitting the lenses of Kris' glasses perched on the windowsill that it must be time to wake up. Or for Kris to wake up, since he had to go to work early today. 

It hadn't been a bad night, being awake. He had written most of the lyrics to a new song, one he was sure was better than most of what was on deck for his album. And not so coincidentally, he had realized that his heart had been seeing the truth better than his head. 

 

"Whassgoinon?" Kris mumbled, reaching out to touch Adam's chest. That was what had woken him up -- the shaking. "Did we have an earthquake?"

"No..." Adam patted Kris' back, while holding in his laughter. No earthquake, but something _had_ shaken loose inside him over the course of the night. Each time Kris had woken him up by reaching out in his sleep to hold on to him, that tight hard knot of distrust had loosened its hold. He had not slept much, but he had thought a lot and had felt even more. 

"Huh? Whasswrong?" Kris blearily looked around, sliding his arm more fully around Adam's waist. 

"I think your bed sprang a leak..." Adam whispered, trying to keep a straight face as Kris slowly woke up, patted the mattress, even more slowly realized they were lying on the floor and looked completely confused. 

"Huh? Why are we on the floor? Are we on the floor? What happened?"

"Your bed sprang a leak." 

Kris gaped, appalled. "My bed leaked?"

Adam gave in and broke into laughter. "C'mon, it's funny." 

"Good lord. Just when I think I can't do anything more embarrassing... My bed sprang a leak. When? How?" 

"Well, the sound woke me up and at first I thought it was you farting."

Kris blinked at Adam, then laughed. "Okay, so the bed leaking is better than me farting so loud it woke you up."

"See? Glass half full." Adam tightened his arm around Kris and pulled him back to his side, where Kris had stayed tucked most of the night. When he wasn't rolling on top of Adam or tucking his head into Adam's neck and shoulder curve or circling Adam's waist with his arm and sighing, then falling back asleep. Kris was, as he'd said right from the beginning, a touchy-feely guy. Even in his sleep. Part-way through the night, perhaps when Kris had wiggled closer for the twentieth time, he had realized that he had been over-cautious at best and a fool at worst. Logic told him that no one could pretend in their sleep, his eyes told him that Kris looked at him with his heart in his own eyes, and his heart told him it had found its match. 

"Are you honestly going to be all positive before you have your coffee?" Kris grumbled, turning his head and rubbing his cheek against Adam's bare shoulder. He kissed the warm freckled skin under his lips and rolled until he was lying against Adam. Frowning once again in confusion until he remembered Adam putting his underwear back on right before he fell asleep, apologizing for being paranoid, Kris flicked his fingers at the offending garment. Honestly, he hoped he never met the guy who'd sold those pictures, because he'd kill him and... Ugh. The floor was hard now that the mattress had lost all its air. What was he going to do? "That leak...I bet duct tape could fix it."

"We can buy that tie-dye duct tape!" Adam agreed. Yeah and then he'd buy Kris a futon because no way was he sleeping on an air mattress ever again. Unless -- god forbid -- the boy wanted to go camping and...yeah, but no. There was a lot he would do for Kris, but no camping. "But we'll find another use for that duct tape because I should replace this mattress for you."

"Why?" Kris asked, levering up on an elbow to glare at Adam. "I don't need charity."

"I'm sure I broke it. It probably wasn't meant for our combined weight--"

"You better--" Kris began, then rolled on top of Adam, smiling as Adam immediately put his hands on Kris' hips and began caressing his skin. Adam was touchy feely too. "You better not make some crack at your own expense. There will be no _stupid_ ass negativity about your body in my house, buster." He poked at Adam's shoulder. 

"Buster?" Adam asked absently, more focused on the feel of Kris' skin under his fingers and the touch of Kris' hands sliding from his shoulders down to his chest, always touching. 

"Yeah. As in I will bust your balls if you talk bad about yourself around me!" 

"Oh? How will you do that?" 

"I'll show you." Kris promised. Hooking his fingers in the sides of Adam's underwear, he tugged on them. "I understand why you wore them to sleep in, but now you're awake and I want you naked." 

"Oooh, bossy." Adam pretended to wrestle with Kris until Kris succeeded in pulling off his underwear with a look of triumph. He was the winner, Adam thought, with the way Kris seemed so eager to get him naked. He actually forget how he needed to lose a few more pounds when Kris looked at him like... he was looking at him right now. 

"My turn to be bossy." Kris flung himself back on top of Adam, unable to resist rubbing against him while Adam's hands pressed firmly on his back. "Now..." He shoved his knee in between Adam's legs, then pressed upward until he saw Adam begin to frown. "No bad thoughts about your body in my house." When Adam said nothing, Kris pressed harder. "Do you hear me?"

"Yeees!" Adam squeaked out in an unnaturally high voice.

Cracking up, Kris released his hold and then squeaked himself as Adam immediately rolled him over and under him. "Mmm..." Kris wiggled happily under Adam as he wrapped his arms around Adam's shoulders and slid his legs out to wrap them around Adam's thighs. This was perfect or almost perfect. "I like this. I like your naked body and all that skin and your legs and your shoulders and oh yeah...that..." Kris moaned as Adam began to thrust his cock against his hip. "Oh hell yeah. Keep goin'. By the way, I'm so glad you stopped playing the virgin in a romance novel." 

Laughing, Adam asked, "Because you're not really the seducer?" 

"God, no. I'm not tall enough. Or dark enough. Really, dude, that's your job. Oooh, good job..." Kris moaned as his own cock scraped up against Adam's pelvis with every thrust of Adam's hips. 

Adam burst out laughing once again. He slid his hands under Kris to cup his ass and pull him up tighter against his body. "Wait. What do you know about romance novels?"

Kris smiled at Adam's happy face. "Oh, when I was home sick after that trip to Morocco, I was just dying of boredom on the couch. Too sick to do anything and sick of daytime tv. So one day, I dug around for something to read and found my mom's romance novels. To be honest..." He laughed again. "Reading them was one thing that kinda cemented my realization that I was gay." 

"How? You didn't jerk off to the exposed bosoms on the covers?" Adam reached up and pinched Kris' nipple, laughing when Kris squeaked, then pushed his chest up into Adam's hand. Ah, well, then. Adam slid down and bent his head, his tongue sneaking out to lap at the reddened nipple, hearing Kris' breathing change and his voice go deeper with each pass of Adam's tongue.

"No. To the exposed male chests ...oh yeah...on the covers and the descriptions of the guy's 'rampant manhood' and 'diamond-hard maleness.'" Kris winced at the stupid words, then gave a low moan as Adam's teeth scraped against the hard tip of his nipple. Now that was a good little pain. More... He pushed himself up on his elbows to move his nipple closer to Adam's retreating mouth. Damn talented mouth, that blow job last night had been the best thing ever. 

"Sounds painful. No wonder the women want to stay virgins." Adam laughed again, then pulled back to blow air against the wet nipple, grinning when Kris mumbled a complaint and tried to urge his head back. "No. You're not telling me the story properly. So back to the romance novels."

"Your focus is..." Kris shook his head and then grinned. One day, he knew, he hoped, Adam would trust enough to completely turn that focus on him...he'd had a taste last night and it had left him hungry for more and more. Then again, he might not survive. But like Adam said, he'd die happy. Like now... yes, like now, he thought when Adam slid back up and once again began thrusting his cock against Kris, this time, against his pelvis. Oh closer, he decided and shifted under Adam's weight to try and line their cocks up. "Damn you!" Kris laughed when Adam immediately moved away. "You weren't playing a virgin. I figured it out -- you're just a cock tease." 

"So when you realized you were more focused on what the women thought of the guy..." And this guy had a nice ass, Adam thought, as Kris alternately pressed against his pelvis and back into his hands. 

"And imagining I was the recipient of all that rampantness? Yeah. I mean, I knew it before, but when you find yourself with cock in hand while reading a romance novel where half of the description is about ruffles just to get to the diamond-hard male member...." Kris shrugged, then grinned as he stroked one hand over Adam's chest and grasped his hard cock in his hand. As Adam pushed his cock into Kris' hand, Kris licked his lips. Nice big male members... they're always big in the novels, you know? Not so much in real life, but I hit the jack pot... 

"So that's what passes for porn in Conway, Arkansas?" Adam grinned as he deciphered Kris' sotto voce mumblings. "They don't sell the latest copy of Leather Man at the Piggly Wiggly?"

Losing himself in the headiness of his own laughter, the warmth in Adam's eyes and the feel of their bodies pressed together, Kris sighed and held Adam closer. "I can't believe you remember me talking about the Piggly Wiggly."

"It's easy. You're always wiggling and--"

"And if you say I'm a pig for--" Kris gasped as Adam's hand on his ass slid toward his crack and his index finger began circling... "Oh maybe I am..." 

"So, no internet porn, though? Did you know the highest per capita use of internet porn is in Utah?"

"How did you know that?" Kris asked, unsure if he was more astonished at Adam's ability or desire to talk through sex or his mastery of arcane bits of information. 

"Like I always say, it's always the religious who turn out to be the freaks in bed." Adam grinned. "Like you and your pirate fetish."

"I don't have a --" 

"You kept the little sword -- I saw it in your junk drawer. But no romance novels. Someday you'll have to read one of those books aloud to me..." Adam suggested.

"Ohhh! We can act it out!" Kris agreed eagerly, as he abruptly moved his head and began to lick Adam's nipple. He pulled back to judge Adam's reaction from his face which... oh yeah, that apparently worked. "We could act out a pirate story... Hey..." Kris remembered. "We still have some doubloons left..."

"Hmm. You could try and buy your freedom with them." Sliding his left hand from under Kris' body to skim over Kris' torso, Adam hoped Kris wasn't planning on getting his freedom any time soon. Now that he knew what he wanted, he wasn't letting go. 

"Oh, you're the pirate captain and I'm the prisoner?" Kris grinned. That was a damn hot idea. "What if I don't want to buy my freedom?" He kissed the base of Adam's neck,then licked upwards, nipping the chin, teasing, hoping... oh yeah... He groaned as Adam took over, softly bit his bottom lip and then angled his mouth so that his tongue could take everything Kris' mouth had to give. "Mmmm....freedom isn't..." Kris began when Adam briefly lifted his mouth. 

"Then you'll be forced to be my cabin boy," Adam growled as he quickly grabbed Kris' hands and forced them over his head. 

"You don't have to force me to be your anything. I'm totally willing..." Kris whispered huskily as Adam's legs forced his further apart and he pushed his cock harder against Kris' hip. "I'll do anything you want." 

"Will you?" Adam nodded. "Well, then, you'll allow me to buy you a new bed." 

"I....I...." Kris spluttered. He shoved at Adam, grunting in frustration when Adam proved to be an immovable object. With a rock between his legs that was now rubbing against his. Kris surrendered and arched up against Adam. "Will do whatever you want." 

 

"So, you're going to wear the ruffles?" Adam asked as he cleaned Kris' body with the wet paper towel, then bent his head and kissed Kris' flat stomach.

"You want me to wear a pirate shirt?" Kris asked incredulously, even as he slid his hands into Adam's hair as his mouth moved over his skin. Something was different in his touch or was it in what he was feeling? He closed his eyes, trying to understand. Adam's touch felt... like home. His mouth, his hands were warm and was it... He was home. The moment his mind articulated the thought, his eyes popped open to see Adam looking at him with a wide smile. Once again, Adam just looked so happy. He lifted his hand and touched Adam's cheek, hoping he'd never do anything to make him look unhappy. 

"I'll wear the hat!" Adam offered. 

"I'm not wearing ruffles. I'll wear the hat." Kris nodded. A hat couldn't be too bad. Johnny Depp wore a hat in the Pirates movies and everyone had thought it was cool. Then again... it was Johnny Depp who kinda defined cool in the weird cool kinda way, and no way was he Johnny Depp cool. 

"Okay." Adam stood up to throw away the paper towel in the kitchen trash. 

"Uh-oh." Kris sighed and reluctantly stood up himself. Grimacing at the deflated air mattress, he reached for his glasses perched on the windowsill. "You gave in too easily, which means you have an idea for some huge and horrible hat..."

"I don't, actually, although--" Adam broke off as his phone rang. He pulled it out of his dark jeans and saw that it was a text from Lane. Had she... He looked up at Kris, frowning down at the air mattress while rubbing his hair before glancing in Adam's direction and giving an embarrassed grimace. Screw it. He was going with his instincts. 

"Aren't you going to answer that? Wasn't that Lane's ring?" Kris asked curiously as he bent over to fold the mattress. 

"Later. By the way, I think you might have some session work coming your way," Adam said as he pulled on his own jeans. He was enjoying the view of Kris' ass, but wished he could also see his face

"You... You didn't get me work, did you?" Kris asked, turning around, bristling. "Because I don't want you to do that--"

"I know. You already said that. A few times. Quite emphatically." Which, Adam admitted, was a point in Kris' favor. But... it was probably time to stop worrying about Kris using him to further his music career. Then again, Kris had a surfeit of pride sometimes, so he might not accept help. Well. That was what Geoffrey was for. "So, my little hedgehog, the work is not from me. Geoffrey's office called."

"How do you know that?" Kris asked. He rubbed his hands on his thighs. 

"Last night, I couldn't sleep and then I had an idea for a song, so I got up to poke through your junk drawer for some paper and a pen. I saw your phone in there--"

"That's where it was!" Kris sighed in relief. 

"I put it on the counter for you and noticed that the screen showed a call from Geoffrey's office so I assumed they had some session work for you."

"Oh!" Kris nodded. "That would be kickass. Oh, wait, I almost forgot, I changed my phone number as of midnight." He recited his new number.

"Okay. Why?" Adam asked as he input Kris' new number into his phone.

"I was thinking about what you said about hope and being realistic. And I've kept that old number even when it was a pain in the ass after moving out here. It seemed like... changing that number was... well, a way to make a break, you know? Face reality?"

"Wellll...." Adam began, but Kris kept talking. "Are you asking me what I think or telling me what you think?

"Both?"

"That sounded confident and emphatic." 

"I'm working on that. It also occurred to me...." Kris blushed. "If I date you, sooner or later, the world is gonna know and it seems like those people who didn't call me after I left home might call me then, ya know?"

"Oh, I know. Believe me." Adam nodded. "So you're making sure they don't contact you?" It was also, he thought, a good way to stop _hoping_ they would contact you if you made sure they couldn't. He winced. "The end of hope is a dark place. But you seem okay with it. So you are confident."

"I am now." Kris nodded at Adam. He really had Adam to thank for that. "Your attitude of... demanding respect rubbed off on me. If I wasn't good enough to contact before, I don't want my relationship with you to make me good enough." 

"I understand. But are you sure that no one, absolutely no one, would respond positively if you contacted them?"

"Why? You asked me that the other night? Do you think I'm lying?" Kris scrubbed his hand over his head in annoyance.

"Oooh, calm down, Hedgehog," Adam teased, smoothing his hand over Kris' hair. "It just seems as though the odds of life would indicate that not everyone would be a homophobic asshole. Maybe one or two of them just needed a little time to process the notion that someone they loved could be different than expected. Maybe they needed time to miss you and realize what they had lost."

"Humph." Kris crossed his arms over his chest. He knew Adam was probably smiling at him and if he looked over and saw that smile, he'd smile back and right now he wanted to just be mad.

"Maybe if your friends are as laid back as you normally are, they're waiting for you to make the first contact."

" _Me?_ Why should I..."

"You shouldn't have to, but...." Adam shrugged. "No biggie. Just a thought. And remember...." He bent his head and gave Kris a quick kiss. "If you hadn't made the first move, we might not be together right now." 

Kris smiled. "You're right."

"Of course. I'm always right."

"No. You're always bossy."

"But I'm right too. You should contact one of them. The guy most likely not to be an asshole." 

"Was that a category in your yearbook?"

"Should have been, don't you think?"

"That probably would've been the most useful prediction, don't ya think?" Kris smiled as Adam began talking about his latest argument with his brother. 

 

"I'll tell Kris you'd like him to call," Lane agreed. Again. The bloke must have asked her six times over breakfast if she'd ask Kris to call. She smiled as she said her goodbyes to Kris' friend and sighed with relief as she went back to her rental car. "At least some of the people in this town aren't mad..." She shuddered as she looked over her shoulder at the tiny gift shop where she'd been informed that unicorns were the work of the devil. Sliding into her car, she began to press the speed dial for Adam to give him a synopsis and then swore when she realized she had no signal. Again? Oh well, it wasn't like Adam was going to make any huge decisions today any way. 

 

"If the work isn't later today, would you like to come over to my house tonight for dinner?" Adam asked abruptly. He'd made his decision. Time to act upon it. 

"You bet!" Kris smiled and held back the urge to pump his fist in the air in triumph. It had taken forever for Adam to trust him enough to welcome him into his house. It had been a long time since he himself had been in anyone's home and oh wait, his mama would skin him alive... "What would you like me to bring? Wine or beer or a cake? Cake is good."

"Just yourself." 

"No, c'mon..." Kris complained. Should he bring a change of clothes over? Was that a reasonable assumption? He didn't know. He'd never stayed over at any guy's house before or truth be told, had a guy stay over at his place before. God, he hoped he hadn't been farting in his sleep! All he remembered about last night was waking up a few times when Adam had rolled away in his sleep and cuddling up next to him. Damn, the man was so warm. 

"Okay. Bring a furniture catalog over and we'll pick you out a new chair." Adam hid his grin and counted. 1, 2, 3 until Kris went on a tear about that damn chair.

"No way am I getting rid of this chair! I like my chair. Plus, I got it for free!"

"Where? On the street where it was left out for the trash?" 

"Hey, you shut up about my chair!" Kris snapped his sock at Adam's ass, turning away to sniff while hiding his smile. God, he loved fighting with Adam. "It's comfy. And big enough. And comfy! The mushrooms are kinda cute."

"You've been eating too many funny mushrooms if you think that!"

"Ha! The color of those mushrooms reminds me of your--" 

**Beep**

Adam glanced down at his phone and said apologetically, "Excuse me? That's my mom. I'm supposed to do brunch with her today."

 

"He was looking really skinny, Mom."

"How skinny?" Leila asked curiously. Dani, Lane, Geoffrey and even that Hannah had all talked about this Kris in very positive terms. More importantly, Adam had mentioned this Kris every time he'd talked to her. She couldn't remember the last time he'd been this excited about a boy... maybe since Brad? "You mean unnaturally skinny, right? So eating disorder skinny or not enough food skinny?"

"Not enough food skinny. He's filled out recently, but... Remember how you used to send me gift cards to Whole Foods and Trader Joe's? He doesn't have anyone to send him gift cards for food."

"Because he's trying to make it in music instead of a sensible job? Maybe his parents will turn around soon. Your father was angry at first, but he ended up writing you a lot of checks," Leila reminded Adam. She'd bet good money Adam was probably finding ways to feed this young man. 

"His parents kicked him out when he told them he was gay and he hasn't heard from them since."

"Oh no! I don't know how parents do that!" Leila said indignantly, her face softening sympathetically, then hardening, an instant later. "I don't mean to be cynical, but have you had this story checked out?" Leila felt her heart clench when Adam gave her a little smile, a sad little smile. It hurt her to see how her once-trusting and open son had learned the lessons of distrust.

"Lane ran a _full_ background check. She's did the initial work and it came back perfect, so I asked her to do a full work up. She's..." Adam looked over at his mother and said softly, "She's on her way back from Arkansas right now, but... I haven't checked my voice mail. I... Mom. I..." 

"How long have you been seeing this boy?"

"We've been dating for a couple of months now. I asked Lane to do the basic check early on, like the first day I met him."

Ahhh. Leila nodded. Adam's instincts had told him something important -- but was it that this boy was going to be trouble or the opposite? She was going to call Lane herself. "I see. How have you found the time to date?"

"I made time." 

"Well, I'm all for you taking some time for fun. You work too hard." Leila pointed toward Adam's omelette. "Eat." 

Adam rolled his eyes and resumed eating his food. "You always say that. All of that."

"Because it's always true. I think that's why you ended up with that... _person_ who was using you -- because you were tired and distracted and weren't listening to you own instincts."

"Gee, Mom, don't sugarcoat it." Adam nibbled his strawberry, then shrugged and took a big bite, relieved his mother had not brought up the additional truth that maybe he had wanted to be in a relationship badly enough that he'd been willing to overlook red flags or... maybe he just got played. But really, wasn't it time to move along? 

"And while I'm at it..." Leila began again with a smile, then said seriously, "The background check was a good idea." 

"And... if you met him, that would be a good idea too." Adam looked into his coffee cup. "Speaking of good ideas, I've invited him over to my house for dinner."

Leila sat back and looked carefully at her son's face. He had not invited a man over to his house in over a year, let alone sought her opinion on a man. This development was exciting. Now, she really wanted to meet his young man. Trying to keep it light, she asked, "So is it to set up a safe site for seduction or because -- according to Lane -- you're hell-bent on feeding him?"

"I'm shocked --" Adam began, then looked at his mother's amused face and shrugged. "I'm turning into great-grandma from New Jersey." 

Leila laughed, "So what are you going to feed him first?"

"I'm not a slut, Mom." Adam thought for a moment about food options and whether or not this was too much of a test, then decided. "I think he'd really like a home-cooked meal, but therein lies the problem." 

"You know, Adam, if you had ever taken me up on my offer to teach you how cook, you could make him a meal and then insist he take the leftovers."

"Or..." Adam smiled at his mother. "You could make him a meal..."

Leila laughed. "I'll make him a meal, _if_ you help." 

 

"What are you doing on your night off?" John asked as they stacked glasses.

"I'm goin' over to the guy's house I'm dating for dinner." Kris glanced over at John in the mirror and caught sight of his own grin. God, he looked like such a sap. A happy sap, though. 

"You ever going to tell me anything more about him than his first name?" John asked curiously. This guy was the first thing in the many months Kris had worked here that he'd actually seemed truly excited about. 

"I..." Kris looked down at the column of high-ball glasses and flicked his finger at the rim of the top one. "I don't wanta jinx it, you know? He's special."

"Why? 'Cause he has a really big banana?" John laughed, then yelped when Kris flicked a towel at his arm. 

 

 

"You're early -- great! Come in!" Adam urged, grabbing Kris' wrist and tugging him inside.

"Do I have a choice?" Kris chuckled as the door banged shut behind him. Adam was eager -- hopefully that and the fact that they were in Adam's home -- privacy! -- meant tonight would be gooooood. "Mmm..." he moaned softly as Adam pulled him into his arms for a hug.

"Do you want a choice?" Adam asked, tipping Kris' chin up for a kiss. 

"Depends upon the offers..." Kris rubbed his body up against Adam, smiling triumphantly when Adam hissed a breath in. He couldn't believe he had that effect on someone with as much experience as Adam. "Your mouth, your hands or --"

"Adam? Is this your friend?" 

"Mom." Adam choked and looked over his shoulder. "Give me a moment, please."

"Oh, sure. I'll go back into the kitchen where I belong," Leila teased, staring at her son's back and noting how he had his arms wrapped around his date. Good sign. When a short brown-haired young man peeked around Adam's arm, she stared back, then grinned. "I see the problem. You _are_ cute. Clearly, I should spend more time in Starbucks myself if this is what they're selling there." 

"Oh god, I died." Kris hid behind Adam's body, slammed his forehead onto Adam's chest and groaned in embarrassment. "I hope I died. Otherwise, this would be...horrible." 

"I've seen much worse, young man. After all, I've been to quite a few of Adam's concerts." Leila grinned as her son let out a loud shriek of annoyance and Kris burst out laughing. Well. This was going to be an interesting night. It might be more interesting for Adam if he checked his voice mail from Lane.


	14. Of moms and meat

**Chapter 14: Of moms and meat.**  
 _Note: This chapter begins immediately after the previous chapter._  
Rating: PG-13

"Oh, sure. I'll go back into the kitchen where I belong," Leila teased, staring at her son's back and noting how he had his arms wrapped around his date. Good sign. When a short brown-haired young man peeked around Adam's arm, she stared back, then grinned. "I see the problem. You are cute. Clearly, I should spend more time in Starbucks myself if this is what they're selling there." 

"Oh god, I died." Kris hid behind Adam's body, slammed his forehead onto Adam's chest and groaned in embarrassment. "I hope I died. Otherwise, this would be...horrible." 

"I've seen much worse, young man. After all, I've been to quite a few of Adam's concerts." Leila grinned as her son let out a loud shriek of annoyance and Kris burst out laughing. Well. This was going to be an interesting night. It might be more interesting for Adam if he checked his voice mail from Lane.

"Mom!" Adam protested, looking over his shoulder again and smiling at his mom, while petting Kris' head. 

"Honey, if you don't want me knowing about your sex life, then don't suck on microphones while I'm at the show, okay?" Leila teased, enjoying the red flush on her son's cheeks. "Annnnd he blushes. My job here is complete. TTFN!"

Kris tilted his head back. "You _are_ blushing."

"My mom is evil. And I'm cursed by the fact that I'm a ginger. And my mom is evil." Adam shrugged, even as he felt himself smiling at the warmth in Kris' face directed at him. "What can I say?" 

"Why is your mom is here?"

"I can't actually cook, so my mom is here. I hope that's okay."

Kris smirked. "You really are a mama's boy."

"I make no effort to deny that." 

"Adam!" Leila called out. "You promised you'd help me."

"I didn't actually _promise_ ," Adam protested, dragging Kris by the wrist into the kitchen.

"Are you trying to prevaricate with me while I'm holding your grandmother's spoon?" Leila asked, holding up a large silver spoon.

"Damn, that's big..." Kris whispered. "I wasn't planning on saying that until I was in your bedroom." 

Adam cracked up, then shook his head at his mother as he walked toward her. "I am not wearing an apron."

"When have I ever worn an apron?"

"Never. That's reason number 486,531 why you're the coolest mom ever." Adam kissed his mother's hand.

"It's too bad they don't give an award for biggest suck up!" Leila swatted Adam's butt with her spoon.

Adam grabbed the spoon and held it upright. "I do have that award." 

"From where?" 

"The gay bar on --"

"Adammmm!" Leila laughed.

Kris stared, his eyes wide. This mother and son had no problem joking about Adam's gayness. Maybe... Or maybe, Mrs. Lambert was one of those mothers who truly did accept her children no matter what. "You're lucky...." he whispered to Adam. 

"I am," Adam agreed. "Okay, I'll help."

"Get serious." Leila shuddered. "I know what happens when you help in the kitchen. Chaos, disaster, and the devolution of the American family system." 

"You stole that directly from a review of my AMA performance, Mom," Adam accused.

Leila shrugged. Interesting things happened in public when Adam didn't have a boyfriend. She peered over at this Kris boy, who had already made Adam laugh a few times and who seemed perplexed over the byplay she had with her son. And maybe a little envious, which made sense given that Lane had just told her that Kris had been a mama's boy. Then again, she thought guiltily, he might be feeling excluded. "Do you like helping out in the kitchen, Kris? Would you--" 

"Oh yeah, I'll help," Kris offered instantly. When Leila snapped to look at him, he flushed. "I mean, I could help. If you want..."

"I would be happy to have you," Leila agreed with a smile. "Can you help me tenderize the chicken?"

"Hey - I could've helped beat meat," Adam interjected. "I'm an expert."

Kris bent over laughing, then laughed more when Leila snagged the spoon back from Adam and lightly bopped Kris on the head with it. "Adam is always looking for an audience. Don't encourage him."

"Can't help it," Kris whispered. "I think he's funny."

Leila sighed loudly even as a smile curved her lips. "Abandon all hope ye who enter here." 

"No, seriously, how can I help?" Kris asked. He nodded as Leila explained what she wanted him to do while Adam poured them each a glass of white wine and then sat down at the kitchen island and watched. Kris kept darting him nervous looks, but then relaxed when he realized Adam was content to watch and listen and throw in an occasional comment as Leila and Kris worked together and talked quietly about food. 

"I used to help my mom," Kris confided eventually, his words slow, as if he were carefully poking at a wound to see if it still hurt. "My mom and I spent a lot of time together in the kitchen." 

Leila said cautiously, "I have a lot of good memories of cooking with my mother and grandmother in my grandmother's kitchen. Especially for the holidays."

"Oh yeah. Yams."

"I know more about latkes, but..." Leila smiled. "So tell me about this yam recipe. Do you know it?"

"You bet." Kris smiled. "I remember this one time..." 

"Ugh. I don't like yams," Adam interjected eventually after Kris had wound down from a recollection. Watching Kris and his mother together had been illuminating. Kris was happy helping in the kitchen -- relaxed and natural. And obviously missing his own mother, he had opened up to Leila's quiet questioning about his life in Arkansas. 

"You would if you had my mama's yams," Kris argued.

Seeing Kris' face tighten a moment later, Leila interjected. "They are _your_ yams now. You could make them. In your own kitchen. For your own people..." She suggested gently, then trailed off as Kris nodded but looked down.

"It sounds gross," Adam argued back, wanting to see more fire and less sadness in Kris' eyes. 

Leila nodded approvingly behind Kris as he swung toward Adam, pointing the spoon in his direction. "Yams are good for you, Mr. Freshology Guy. Lotsa Vitamin A and antioxidants." 

"Hmm. I am yet to be convinced. You'll have to make them for me sometime," Adam challenged, glad to see the paleness in Kris' cheeks had been lost with a flush of color as he argued. 

"Maybe I will!" Kris said firmly.

"Maybe I'll eat them. _Maybe_." 

"Is he always this stubborn?" Kris asked Leila.

"Yes." Leila laughed. She turned to the oven. "Okay, the food is about ready and I'll be taking off."

"No. Stay. Please?" Kris asked. Seeing the surprise on Leila's face, he blushed and looked down. "Oh. I'm sorry, Adam. That was rude for me to invite someone to dinner at your own house." Glancing up and seeing the smile on Adam's face, he relaxed again, moved next to Adam and began to tease, "Even if it was your mama who just made us dinner. A really fantastic dinner by the smell of it....Mmmm... And it seems a shame for your mama to leave and go out there in the cold and eat somewhere else all by herself and --"

"Are you sure you're not Jewish?" Adam teased back. "Because that was a good-faith effort at a guilt trip." 

"Did it work?" Kris asked. "Because if so, I'll file it under the heading of 'Strategies that work with Adam.'" He bumped his hip against Adam and smiled up at him.

"Honesty is the best strategy," Adam said softly, curling his arm around Kris and gently rubbing his upper thigh.

"I'll remember that." Kris smiled again and arched up to kiss Adam on the cheek. "Thanks for letting me invite your mom on our date.

Leila arched an eyebrow, surprised and glad that Adam was looking at Kris with such ... well, the way he used to look at guys he liked, with warmth and affection. They were both touchers too. She nodded. The two of them had a nice chemistry. And actually, the way Kris was looking at Adam...oh, my. Was that boy in love with him? 

"So how did you meet my son?" Leila asked as they ate at the dinner table, Adam having scurried back to the kitchen for the pitcher of iced tea Kris had made. 

"I'm confused. Adam didn't tell you?"

"He did. But he tends to embellish his stories occasionally. I know that's _shocking_ news." 

"Totally." Kris grinned back at Adam's mother as Adam hummed in the kitchen while selecting a bottle of wine. "But what did he say?"

"He's very proud of having met you on his own," Leila confided loudly.

"I heard that!" Adam called out.

Leila shrugged as Adam returned to the room. "He's a control freak. And he got supremely irritated because everyone kept trying to set him up and I mean everyone --"

"Totally ridiculous. I can find my own dates." Adam grimaced abruptly. "Evidence to the contrary." 

"Stop it," Kris and Leila said in unison. Leila sat back and pressed her lips together, interested to see what, if anything, Kris might do next. 

"Forgive yourself, dude," Kris urged. "I bet that's what you'd tell a friend if they were in your position." 

Adam stared into Kris' eyes. "I... You make a good point."

"Besides didn't you tell me that you got played on a big stage, but I got played on the Olive Garden stage, but we were both played, just different size stages?" Kris pressed. "So if _I_ should let that mistake of mine go -- going out with a jerkface who wanted to use me -- why shouldn't _you_ , right?"

Leila watched as Adam's tension disappeared and the guilt in his eyes over being fooled vanished. Her eyes snapped to Kris. Well, well, well. No one had been able to get Adam to stop beating himself up before, even for a moment. Her gaze sharpened as she watched Kris. This young man would bear some watching. 

Adam rolled his shoulders and smiled slowly. "Point taken under advisement. Why don't you tell my mother your story?"

Kris sighed and turned to Leila. "Okay, I thought this guy was nice when he asked me out. Then we're sitting over unending pasta bowls at the Olive Garden and he informs me _exactly_ what he expects me to do in exchange for him buying me nine bucks of pasta!"

"Olive Garden pasta!" Adam added. "And he wasn't asking or suggesting, he was demanding. Demanding Kris whore himself out for a nine dollar bowl of pasta!" 

"Yeah, at least if you're going to whore yourself out, charge more, right?" Kris asked, looking down at his plate. 

"What did you do, Kris?" Leila asked indignantly. She had never really worried about Adam in that way -- he was a big guy and wouldn't hesitate to punch someone in the nose if he felt it necessary, but Kris was much smaller. And she'd imagine much less aggressive than Adam, who was not a good bet to cross.

Kris grinned abruptly. "You know how in Olive Garden the restrooms are always towards the front? After eating as much as I could stand, I excused myself to go to the bathroom, walked out the front door, over to the next restaurant on the strip, and called a cab." 

"Well, I hope you ate enough pasta to compensate for the cab fare!" Leila grumbled. "What a total jerk."

"Stupid too. Thing was, Kris would have probably slept with the guy if he hadn't demanded it--" Adam grinned when Kris threw a balled-up napkin at him.

"Your mama is sitting right here!" Kris protested. 

Leaning forward, Adam whispered in a conspiratorial tone, "I think she knows adult men have sex." 

Rolling her eyes, Leila leaned forward and using the same tone, whispered, "I also know for a fact that adult women have sex. Even women, ahem, my age." 

Kris' eyes opened wide in surprise, then crinkled up with laughter as he heard Adam shriek, "MOM!"

"What, my darling son?" Leila asked with an innocent look. There was no man, but it was always a good dinner game to wind her son up.

"Who is he? Why haven't I met him? Is he good enough for you?" Adam asked as he jumped to his feet. "You should let me meet him or at least run a background check--"

Background check. Kris bit his lip. Adam... Hannah had told him the last time he was over in Brush's office that Adam was having a full background check run on him. 

"It's unimportant." Leila shrugged.

"Unimportant? Oh, no, I think not--" Adam began ranting as he paced around the room.

Kris leaned toward Leila and touched her hand lying on the table top. "I think I can see what kind of dad Adam is going to be one day." 

"Me too." Leila smiled and squeezed Kris' hand. "Strict, but--"

"Protective." 

"What are you two talking about?" Adam asked suspiciously, staring at their enjoined hands. "You're making me nervous."

"Why? You haven't told Kris he has to put out in exchange for dinner tonight, have you?" Leila asked. She grinned as she stood up and reached for her used dinnerware.

"You raised me better than that. Plus I'm afraid of your spoon." Adam laughed as he put his arms around his mom from behind and gave her a hug. "I'll help clean up. That I can do." 

"What do you want me to do?" Kris asked, sighing as he watched Adam and his mother hug.

"Nothing. You've done enough," Adam said firmly. "Relax. How about... why don't you go into the game room and pick out something. I have Rock Band with the Beatles, remember -- I think you said you wanted to play that and hadn't?"

"Seriously?" Kris asked, eagerly. "That would be awesome. Where is the game room?"

 

"You're allowing him to be alone in a room in your house?" Leila asked curiously when Adam returned to the kitchen, sadly remembering Adam vowing against it after discovering that the other troll who'd hidden a recording device in the house.

"Yes. You were the one -- well, one of them -- who told me I couldn't spend the rest of my life being distrustful. And Kris..." Adam smiled as they loaded the dishwasher. "Obviously I like him. A lot. And my gut tells me he's real. So what do you think....?" He asked in a whisper as they rinsed the dishes before loading the dishwasher.

"I think he's a nice boy. You know, just a _nice_ guy. Polite. Sweet, smart, perceptive."

"That's what Dani said."

"I also think he misses his mother a lot," Leila said softly. Poor boy.

Adam shook his head, then wrapped his arms around Leila and held her tightly once again.

"Ooof!" Leila exhaled as Adam squeezed her tightly. "You're a hug monster tonight, Adam..."

"Have I told you recently that not only are the coolest mom ever, you're the best mom ever?"

"Frequently," Leila whispered back. Holding tightly to her oldest son, before patting him on the back and releasing him, she shook her head. "I bet she regrets it," Leila said softly. "Saying hurtful words, sending him away. I bet she wakes up every day hoping he's okay and goes to bed every night saying a prayer for him."

"Do you?" Adam asked, his tone hopeful as his mother opened the dishwasher and they quickly filled it. Thinking rapidly about various scenarios, Adam finally said, "Maybe I could--"

"Don't interfere, Adam. Don't try and fix it. You don't know Kris well enough yet," Leila warned, forcing her tone to sharpness. Adam's natural tendency to protect and nurture had sadly enough led him down some wrong paths. Oh how she wished she didn't have to caution him against opening his big heart and trying to help, but the past few years had taught her that it was part of her job as a mother to do so. "You don't know the full dynamics. For all you know, Kris is better off without them anyway." 

"I know. I... Lane has texted me three times. Do you think--" Adam bit his words off and looked out the window. "My instincts, everything in me, Mom. Everything in me tells me he's told me the truth. But I want to know what you think?"

"Do I think he's using you to get a free pass to an easier life or fame?" Leila asked bluntly as she picked up her purse and walked toward the door. All Adam had to do was read Lane's texts, but now he was testing himself. "Only time will tell. And a really complete background check -- but that's only about the past. What do you think about the _future_?"

"I think.." Adam touched his midsection. "I feel... I feel like he's the real deal. My gut tells me that my heart is leading me in the right direction. That the stars were in alignment that day and led us both into Starbucks where Kris didn't have enough money for his coffee and... It's kind of amazing to think of all the choices and roads taken and not taken that lead to a moment like that, isn't it? It's either an amazing coincidence or the universe took a hand..."

"In pointing you towards happiness?" Leila finished with a nod in the direction of the game room. Adam was already in love with this boy, even if he hadn't opened himself up to that truth yet. Either Kris should be thanking the Academy or he truly was the perfect match and the latter was far far more likely since the boy didn't seem to have a bit of guile in him. And no poker face. "I agree with you, Adam. Hold on to him. My instincts are telling me that he likes you for you. He seems like a nice, normal guy. Which would be perfect for you-- a good balance." Leila nodded. Kris also seemed like he was generally easy-going, but couldn't be pushed too far, which would also be good for Adam who could push too far. 

"Because I'm not nice or normal?"

"You're a sweet boy," Leila said softly, patting her son's cheek. "But normal? You're unique. That's _better_ than normal."

"You're my mom. You have to say that." Adam smiled and bent to kiss his mother's cheek.

"I have a feeling that Kris thinks so too." Leila nodded, remembering the way Kris had looked at Adam, as though he were something special, just while he sat there and talked. Or listened. 

"So maybe he won't be turned off by the fact that underneath my glitter and general fabulousness, I'm a total dork with way too many freckles who likes to stay home..." Adam grinned when his mother arched an eyebrow. "I do like to stay home sometimes and play video games or read, but the question is whether he'd be cool with that reality." 

"I think that's entirely possible. And he may even _like_ your freckles."

"That's _not_ possible. Ugh." 

"After looking for love for so long, you happen to meet a super guy in a coffee shop, so... Anything's possible," Leila reminded her son. "Anything." 

 

"I can't believe I'm winning at this game! I never do!" Adam chuckled. "Ha!" 

"I got distracted. Your fault." 

"My fault?" Adam wrinkled his nose as he wondered what had distracted Kris. "How--" He broke off when Kris' hand closed around his forearm, squeezed, then his fingertips danced lightly over Adam's bare skin. 

"I like your freckles. My gramma says gold freckles like yours are angel kisses. I want to kiss every one myself."

Adam tossed the game controller aside and reached for Kris.


	15. Holding on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks  
> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 15: Holding on**  
Rating: NC-17  
 _This chapter begins the morning after Chapter 14._

"You are an idiot." 

Adam grimaced into the phone, swung his legs over the bed and stood up. He stopped to look down at a peacefully sleeping Kris in his bed. "No, I'm not. Nothing you can say would convince me I'm anything other than the luckiest guy in the world." 

 

__

_"They're angel kisses and if you kiss ..." Kris punctuated his words by pressing a gentle kiss to a freckle on Adam's bare chest, the moving onto another, then yet another. This never had to end, he thought, wondering why he felt half-drunk when all he'd really had tonight was sweet tea. Probably because Adam had never allowed him the chance to explore his body, they'd always been in such a hurry... But now, it felt like they had all the time. "If you kiss one, then you're lucky."_

_"One?" Adam raked his fingers through Kris' hair as he slowly kissed freckle after freckle. "I have a million." This might take forever and... that would be a bad idea, why? He wondered as he felt the softness of Kris' lips on his skin, kissing his way down Adam's arm. He moaned as Kris reached his wrist and then slowly licked first the eye of Horus design, then moved onto the infinity symbol, his tongue flicking out, then his teeth as he bit at the intersection, closed his eyes and moaned himself._

_"Then I'm going to be the luckiest guy in the world..." Kris answered, glancing up as he moved his mouth back up Adam's shoulder, hoping Adam saw the truth of his words in his eyes._

_"No, that's me from the moment I walked into that Starbucks..." Adam said absently. He slid his hands down Kris' back and curved them around Kris' narrow waist before pulling him up against him._

_"Mmm... then there's that lip freckle." Kris smiled against Adam's mouth, then sent his tongue out to lick the freckle, before gasping as Adam rolled him over and took his mouth in a hard possessive kiss that made his head spin and his cock fill._

_His arms full with a boy whose skin was heating and whose body was hardening underneath him and eyes showed the same desperation he was feeling, Adam pressed harder on the mouth opening under his, feeling the need that matched his own. Sliding his hands downward to cup Kris' ass, Adam pulled Kris up against him, thrusting his hips between Kris' thighs, hearing the slight hitch in Kris' breath and the stillness in his body before he seemed to explode under him, writhing frantically._

_Suddenly, the slow exploration was not enough. With each press of Adam's lips and sweep of his tongue, his blood heated and raced until he was needy and sweating and... "Oh yeah, more..." He wanted more. Now. He could kiss all those freckles later... But right now, he just wanted...oh right there... that cock inside him._

_Rocking his pelvis against Adam's, Kris planted his feet against the floor for more leverage and pushed harder, groaning as he felt the long hard ridge of Adam's cock pressing against his. He clamped his hands on Adam's back, trying to pull him closer until he realized they were as close as they could get with their clothes still on and why were their clothes still on and -- "Huh?" Kris' eyes slowly opened only when he realized Adam's mouth was not on his. Why was he cold and why was Adam standing there looking at him?_

_"My bedroom...." Adam gasped. He was done waiting and worrying. He was done and yet not half-begun._

_"What? Why'd you stop?" Kris smiled and closed his eyes, pushing his hand down over the bulge in his jeans and pressing hard, then moaning. "C'mon..."_

_"Condoms. In. My. Bedroom." Adam hauled Kris to his feet and pushed-pulled him down the hall and up the stairs, the two of them groping each other and nearly stumbling, then laughing at their eagerness._

_"I usually have more finesse than this--"Adam half-apologized, even as his hand clamped around Kris' wrist and tugged his willing body forward. Steps away from being inside Kris' hot ass, Adam decided as he slapped it, to push Kris into the bedroom._

_"Screw finesse--" Kris began, then laughed. "Nah. I'd rather you screw me. I don't need finesse. We've had two months of foreplay -- Finally --_ oh _!" Kris exclaimed as Adam picked him up and threw him butt-first on the bed. He licked his lips. Damn, he liked it when Adam got bossy and that manhandling was... Only the beginning, he realized as Adam reached out and nearly tore his plaid shirt from him. He reached for his own tee-shirt, fingers tangling with Adam's as he unsnapped Kris' jeans._

_Adam grinned as he slapped Kris' hands away. He had felt the trembling in Kris' body and hands. Shaky hands would take too long. Efficiently stripping Kris' clothes from him, he tossed them over his shoulder._

_Kris looked down at his naked body. Damn, Adam was fast. But... not fast enough. "Hurry up!" He ordered, sliding back on the bed, blindly reaching behind him to pull the covers off as he watched Adam --_ of course _\-- contrarily slow down and peel off his tight jeans inch by torturous inch and slapped the bed in frustration. "Come to me!"_

_"Demanding, aren't you?" Adam asked as he ripped his clothes off and flung himself on top of Kris. He smiled as Kris opened his arms and legs and wrapped both around Adam, pulling him close, all in the seconds before Adam took his mouth in a ravenous kiss. Adam hadn't known he was so hungry until now, until he tasted the passion that hardened his cock and softened his heart. This was real. He knew it._

_"Only with you..." Kris whispered the next time he drew a breath, which might have been a second later or minutes or an hour; he neither knew nor cared, just wanted more of Adam's mouth. That was the story, though. He was demanding because he could never get enough of something he'd never truly allowed himself to hope existed and then one day had found when he'd been looking, but still not hoping, not really and... He'd never known he could want this much. Want it all. He held on tighter. Not gonna let go._

_Ohhhh... that mouth. Adam's kiss alone was making him lose control. Kris tilted his head back, opening himself up, just as he slid his legs up Adam's thighs, pushing him harder against his own thrusting body, his movements hurried and needy. And oh god, that was just from a kiss?_

_Feeling Kris squirm under him, trying to find the right position, his hands stroking, then grasping, then pulling Adam deeper into his embrace, Adam lifted his head to look down. The desire in Kris' eyes and the slight sheen of sweat on his chest was more than he could resist and he slid down, licking along the smooth skin, down farther, his hands stroking and smoothing, then cupping and stroking softness over hardness as Kris' hands clutched at his shoulders, then ran into his hair as he moved lower still, over Kris' flat stomach, feeling the muscles there clench under his mouth and the hands on his shoulders dig into the muscles._

_Adam moaned or maybe it was Kris or maybe it was both of them as his hands pushed down on Kris' thigh and his tongue teased along Kris' hip bone, then down into the crease of his thigh and Kris gasped, then groaned, then gasped again when he moved his mouth and engulfed the head of Kris' cock in a move quickened by his own need to have, to have, to have._

_"Oh yessssssssssssss, but no. No, Adam, I'm gonna come, not yet...." Kris begged, although his body betrayed him by pushing his hips up, his cock deeper into Adam's mouth and oh yessssssssssss, he was doing that sucking-twisting thing again and if you could get a Grammy for best mouth performance in that category those weird throat singers from some crazy place won, then.... He blinked when Adam began to laugh around his cock. "I said that out loud, didn't I?"_

_"God, I..." Adam began, then lost his train of thought as Kris sat up and reached for his cock._

_"I want this. Now." Kris stroked Adam's cock, the pre-come making his fingers slick. "You can probably wait, but I can't--"_

_"No. I'm done waiting," Adam began, giving a shove to Kris' shoulders to get him back down. "I've been waiting a long time." He smiled before lowering himself on top of Kris and once again kissing him with all of his pent-up desire and need, his hands roaming from shoulders to thighs and back again, needing to make sure Kris knew he was his._

_"Adam, now--" Kris pleaded when Adam lifted his head, starting to roll over onto his stomach._

_"No..." Adam whispered, pulling Kris back and pushing him down on to his back again. "I want to see your face the first time I slide inside you."_

_"Oh fuck..." Kris whimpered as Adam reached for the nightstand. He continued touching Adam's skin, sliding his hands along his back and butt, then between his legs, smiling when Adam hissed in a breath and his fingers stilled smoothing the condom on before they hurried to complete the task._

_Climbing between Kris' legs, Adam once again bent his head to meet Kris' eager lips. Flipping open the top of the tube, he slicked up his fingers then circled Kris' cock, his hand following the rhythm his tongue was setting, before sliding down over Kris' balls. Feeling Kris breath catch and his hips tilt as he pushed himself forward, Adam groaned. So. Damn. Eager._

_"Are we boyfriends?" Kris asked abruptly as he rubbed his thigh against Adam's hip and his hands clutched Adam's arms in a tight grip. "I...I need to know."_

_Adam opened his mouth and a different answer came out. "You need to know I'm having Lane do a background check on you."_

_"Huh?" Kris blinked and wiggled under Adam. Where was his hand or better yet, his cock? "Whatever. Why'd you stop moving your hand?"_

_"I said--"_

_"I heard you. Like I didn't think you would? Besides Hannah told me. Now answer my real question and because I have evidence that you have no filter, I really wanna know--" Kris grinned. "Are we boyfriends?"_

_"Are we..." Adam smiled and cupped Kris' cheek. He brushed his thumb across Kris' cheekbone before bending his head to warmly kiss him, sinking deeper into the kiss and falling deeper into the man. "What does it feel like?"_

_Smiling, Kris arched up to kiss Adam again, checking... Yes. That was way more than lust. "It feels like --" Love, he was about to say._

_"My boyfriend just kissed me." My boyfriend that loves me, Adam thought as he looked into Kris' eyes and saw the warmth and the depth of feeling there. Perfect._

_"Yeah. My boyfriend just kissed me." Kris squeezed Adam to him in a tight hug. He couldn't let him go, wouldn't. Adam belonged to him. And amazing balls, he belonged to Adam. Finally, he belonged._

_Pulling back and seeing the relief and happiness in Kris' eyes, Adam shook his head and teased, "Oh yeah, you're_ such _a slut-type."_

_"Yeah. Guess not." Kris grinned even as he lifted his hips and wiggled until he could rub his balls and hole against Adam's cock. Watching the spark ignite in Adam's eyes, he did it again. "But I am your type. And I am a slut for you."_

_"Perfect." Adam grinned back and they both began to laugh. He had never imagined, let alone had, fun like this during sex._

_"Are you gonna fuck me now?"_

_For answer, Adam squeezed lube onto his fingertips and circled Kris' pucker with one finger, gently pressing inward._

_"You don't have to be too careful," Kris told him. "I...uh...I've been hoping any day now, we'd.... you know... so I've been using my fingers on myself in the shower every morning..."_

_"Holy. Shit." Adam gritted his teeth. "You will show me that tomorrow morning. For now..."_

_"Yesssss?" Kris hissed as Adam's fingers slid inside him and scissored gently. He planted his feet on the mattress and pushed up, trying to fuck himself on Adam's fingers._

_Holy shit. Adam bit his lip and pulled his fingers free. Sliding his hands under Kris' ass, he ordered, "Spread your legs wider for me and hold on."_

_Hold on... That was advice he needed to give himself, Adam decided as Kris' eyes widened with each inch he slowly took inside him until he began to pant, then let out a small cry when Adam's cock was finally deep inside him. Looking down at their joining, Adam's eyes flew upwards when Kris whimpered and his hands clamped down on Adam's biceps. The look on his face... yes, that was what he'd needed to see -- the sense of surprise and knowledge, the heat and sweetness. And...day-umm, the boy was tight and hot and...feeling Kris tilt up and moan... so welcoming. He wanted more and more and more._

_"Here we go..." Adam whispered, brushing Kris' mouth with his, before he slowly pulled out and felt the shudder of delight that rippled across Kris' body and the small spark as Kris bit his bottom lip. He thrust back again and they both cried out, Adam bending towards Kris and Kris arching up, their mouths meeting as their bodies joined._

_Hold on was the best advice he'd ever gotten, Kris was sure moments later after Adam finally slid home inside him, filling him so completely that he gasped for breath, then groaned. He'd never been so full and oh yessss... He groaned and his head tilted back as he surrendered completely to the onslaught of feelings, the fullness in his body and his heart. Only then did Adam begin to move, each stroke long and hard and sure, each thrust managing to hit that spot and then the heat in Adam's eyes hit another spot, inside his chest. Hold on, he told himself as Adam's hand slid between them and circled his cock, pumping him just as Adam's cock was pumping inside him, taking him again to a new place._

_God, he'd never been_ here _before, Adam realized as Kris' needy hands, gasping breath, and clenching body took him higher and higher. Then Kris lost control faster than he'd expected and moved frantically under him, his body holding him tighter as he called out Adam's name and a stream of words he'd only be able to decipher later, when he replayed the scene in his head for the millionth time, the sight of Kris coming under him, his back arched and his face both shocked and knowing and then replete, enough to set him on fire._

_"That..." Adam took a deep breath, then leaned on one elbow over Kris, the other hand smoothing Kris' hair down. He kissed Kris, sighing when Kris' lips clung to his, only parting reluctantly to tease, "That was the best thiry-eight cents I ever spent."_

_Closing his eyes, Kris inhaled deeply. Adam... oh god, he smelled so good right now. That scent of his, whatever it was, and a little sweaty and a lot sexy. He could do it again. Once he slept for a while. Adam... "Mr. Big Spender..." Kris said finally, rubbing his hands up and down Adam's arms. Feeling the muscles tense under his arms, his eyes popped open and he whined as Adam slowly pulled himself from Kris' body. "I wish you could just stay there until we're ready again..."_

_"Me too. We'll take longer next time." Adam smiled. "But for now, let me clean us both up."_

_"But--" Kris protested again, levering up on one elbow. "I can get up..."_

_"No." Adam splayed his hand on Kris' chest and gently pushed down. When Kris subsided back onto the bed, Adam smiled and ran his hands over the damp skin, smiling when Kris yelped when he tweaked his nipple. "Stay here. Let me do this."_

_Nodding, Kris smiled as Adam walked into the bathroom. "Hey, I got the better deal. I get to watch your naked ass going and then I'll get to see the Glambulge coming back!"_

_Laughing, Adam looked into the mirror as he washed his hand and grabbed some paper towels and wet them. He squinted at his own visage. When was the last time he'd looked that happy?_

_"HURRY. UP!" Kris yelled. He winced. Shit, where were his manners? "I mean... It'd be great if you came back in here before--"_

_"Before what?" Adam asked, approaching the bed. He leaned on one knee and carefully cleaned Kris' body with the wet towels. That had been so quick, much faster than he'd expected but... they had tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow. He knew Lane was going to bring him good news tomorrow. He knew it._

_"I forgot..." Kris whispered, looking up at Adam's face. He looked content and happy. "Do I look the same way..." he wondered._

_"You look thoroughly...." Adam trailed off and his hand stilled its movements. He'd been about to say that Kris looked thoroughly loved. As Kris slid his hand up Adam's arm, over his shoulder and touched his cheek, Adam blinked and looked down at Kris. "You look amazing."_

_"So do you." Kris touched Adam's ear lobe and smiled. "I realize I don't have nearly as much experience as you do, but I think I'm clean now."_

_Adam nodded and returned to the bathroom, laughing when Kris called out, "Yup. I got the best deal. There goes that ass and wait for it...."_

_"Do you want me to stay the night? Is that... okay?" Kris asked softly as Adam slid back into bed. If Adam let him stay, that would mean he'd made a far more momentous decision than which side of the bed Kris was going to get. Kris started when Adam slid one hand around his waist and hauled him up against his side, then used his free hand to rub Kris' hair._

_"Only if you're going to be a hedgehog again like you were this morning. All confused and prickly at the same time? So cute."_

_"Oh stop it and kiss me goodnight."_

 

"And good morning to you too, Neil." 

"Have you told this guy you sent Lane to play private detective on him? And when do I get to meet him? After he goes ballistic on your ass or before?"

"Ummm...." Adam rubbed his face with his free hand and walked towards the kitchen. "I need coffee if I'm going to deal with you." 

"I'm just doing you a favor."

"Yeah, right. Calling me an idiot is doing me as much of a favor as when you used to call me doughboy." 

Neil rubbed his stomach and winced at the remembrance of the last time he'd called Adam that. "You haven't returned my boots yet." 

"I'll buy you new boots. I'm keeping those."

"You are not! I broke them in!" Neil whined.

"I know. And thanks!" Adam said brightly as he rested his forehead against the upper cabinet while poking the coffee maker. "Possession in nine-tenths of the law."

"Why do you want them, anyway?" Neil asked abruptly. "That makes no sense unless... are you planning on going hiking again? Where are you picking up twinks these days? Cabelas? Or-- HA! I know! Dick's Sporting Goods?" Neil laughed as he named two large sporting good stores. 

"I didn't pick him up. He picked me up. Moreover, Kris is not a twink. He's too athletic to be a twink."

Neil paused. Adam had always bitched about how no guys ever asked him out. And Kris wasn't really a twink? This was serious stuff. Very serious since it involved ugly footwear. "So you'd really wear my uglyass boots, go into the woods, hike, and wear bug spray?"

"Yesssss...." Adam ground out with exaggerated patience while glaring at the coffeemaker. C'mon, coffee! "Geocaching was a puzzle, a challenge -- it was like a treasure hunt."

"Well, you always did love the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland," Neil said slowly. 

"Oh crap, that reminds me, I need to have Lane clear a time on my schedule to take Kris to--"

"You're in love with him, aren't you?" Neil interrupted. If Adam was voluntarily going into the woods and finding time to date, he must be serious about this guy. "You are. That's why you put the full-court press on him lately. You're in love with him, so you're claiming him. I know you--"

"What's a full-court press?" Adam prevaricated, while grabbing the cup and pouring himself coffee.

"Don't prevaricate with me. We spent way too many hours playing video games. I know you know what a full-court press is. And that's what you've done with Kris, with Lane playing your guard." Neil laughed. "Which is why I called. You gotta tell him sooner rather than later." 

"Oh, like I should take relationship advice from _you_? Mr. My Relationships End As Soon As The Condom Is Tied Off?"

Neil spluttered, then laughed. "Okay, okay. You got me. But if you want to keep Kris, you need to come clean about your personal private detective, sooner rather than later." 

Adam shrugged as he took another long pull of coffee. "And you know what? I've got a cute, hot boy in my bed right now, so I think I'm done speaking to you. Priorities, bro."

"You had him stay over? Ha! You are in love!" Neil laughed triumphantly as Adam hung up.

 

"Adam?" Lane's voice carried from the foyer. "Adam? You told me to come over this morning..." 

"Oh fuckity fuck fuck fuck!" Adam exclaimed as he looked around the kitchen for something to use for a cover up. Hearing her footsteps quickly grow closer, he flung open the bottom half of the refrigerator door and stood behind it. As the cold air wafted over his butt, he muttered, "I was expecting to have a hot morning in bed, not a cold ass next to the Brie. Give me a break..."

"Adam! Oh. There you are." Lane shrugged and walked into the kitchen to fling her bag onto the table.

"That's a Birkin!" Adam protested. "Honestly, Laney...."

"I just got back from Arkansas. You are not allowed to make any negative comments about how I handle leather for a week!" Lane began, then stopped. "Why are you standing in the refrigerator? Do you have a fever or some sort of..." She pursed her lips. "Rash?"

"No." Adam rolled his eyes. "You caught me naked."

"Why were you naked in the kitchen?" Lane teased. Adam's odd and idiosyncratic bouts of modesty were always amusing.

"It's _my_ kitchen! I can be naked in it!" Adam protested, wondering why he'd given Lane the security code to his house. One of those, 'It had seemed like a good idea at the time...' moments. But right now? "How about you find me a dish towel or something?"

"How about I just go up to your room and grab you some jeans?" Lane stood up.

"No! Shh! Kris is up there sleeping."

"Ah...The plot thickens..." Lane teasingly took a step towards Adam.

"Stop right there." Adam held up his hand. The news could not be bad or Lane would not be joking around. His ass might be freezing, but his body was warm with relief.

Lane stepped forward and smacked Adam's open palm, then curled her fingers around it and squeezed. "You stop. I thought you weren't going to make any huge leaps in your relationship until I got back."

"I changed my mind. Made a decision."

Squeezing Adam's hand again, Lane let go and stepped back. She sat down in a chair, crossed her legs, and swung her foot, ignoring Adam's impatient groan. "I really should make you bloody well suffer. You not only sent me there--"

"It was your idea! You're even more paranoid than I am--"

"But then you ignore my texts." Lane smiled. "So you could make a leap of faith, right?"

"Lane." Adam pouted and curled his hands around the top edge of the refrigerator door. "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease...tell me?" 

"Fine!" Lane held up her hands in surrender. She had about as much chance of resisting the puppy dog pout as Kris did. "Let's put it this way. If you want me to be a bridesmaid when you marry that boy, the wedding cannot be in Arkansas."

Adam took a step back, ignoring the sound of the refrigerator door closing as he stared at Lane. "When I marry that boy... You mean..."

"Based upon what we know from being with Kris over the last couple of months and what I learned about the Kris he was before, you should put a ring on it. And given my view right now..." Lane raised her eyebrows and stared downward. "I should make it clear I'm not talking about a cock ring."


	16. Coming clean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter starts immediately after the end of the previous chapter.

**Chapter 16: Coming clean  
Rating: R**

 

"Huh?" Adam asked, still processing the news. Seeing the smirk on Lane's face, he looked down and shrieked, grabbed the refrigerator door and hid behind it again. "Ohmigod! I'm so sorry." 

"Yeah. So in addition to putting a ring on Kris, you should also put some pants on. Or given the shrinkage factor, why not just use a stick of butter as a cover up?" Lane asked, then smirked.

"You will pay--" Adam growled. Unable to maintain a ferocious facade, he gave in to the grin. Last night had been amazing and his faith had been rewarded this morning. It was going to be a great day and with any luck, a great life.

"I already paid! I was in Arkansas. While you were at some trendy club the other night, do you want to know where I was? I was at Bob's Catfish _Hut_! Trying to chat up the locals! At a Catfish Hut! Not even Pizza Hut! _Catfish_ Hut!"

"Did you say catfish? I don't think I heard you the first time." 

"You didn't hear me--" Lane ground her teeth at Adam's teasing, then realized he was happier than she'd seen him in a long time. And when Adam was happy, he got silly and teased and... it was good to see that again. Even if it meant he'd drive her crazy. 

"No. My ass is so cold, I can no longer hear."

"Because your ass is connected to your ears."

"Well, it's all connected." Adam began to sing, "The leg bone is connected to the--"

"Oh stop it." Lane sighed loudly, while hiding her smile. Adam could be such a dork. " I suppose I could walk towards the towel drawer, while averting my maidenly gaze from your rampant manhood..."

"Oh lord, are you reading romance novels now too?"

"Who reads romance novels?" Lane poked through the drawer, noting how neat it was. Leila had indeed been here. Now where was that little towel....

"Kris."

"That's about as close as that boy's coming to hidden depths of depravity! You know everyone in that town said he was a sweet boy before his shocking fall from grace." Lane laughed and looked up at the ceiling while holding out a small kitchen towel. 

"You have to insult me, don't you?" Adam asked, glaring at the small towel. "You couldn't give me the large towel?"

"You have to argue, don't you?" Lane asked, waving the towel at Adam. "When you could be listening to my report." 

"Fine!" Adam snatched the towel, held it in front of himself, slammed the refrigerator door. "Well, hurry up and give me the short version."

Lane giggled at the annoyed look Adam sent her way. She saluted. "Reporting, Captain. As I was saying when you interrupted me, everyone said he was a nice, sweet boy with an odd sense of humor, before..." Lane paused to hum the Darth Vader music from Star Wars. "You-know-what happened."

"What about his parents? I think they're the most important ones..." Adam trailed off as he saw the sad expression on Lane's face. "Oh no." 

Lane shook her head. "Kris' mother is okay, but she needs a little shaking up."

"So she might be redeemable?"

"My Magic 8 Ball says yes. If she can stop worrying about what other people think. That was her big concern. His father is the kind of man who _seems_ like a nice bloke, all bluff and cheery. But that's only so long as you conform to his rules and his way. Underneath, he is a sanctimonious _prig_ who believes he's doing the right thing even when all the evidence points to the contrary. His brother is... You know, maybe he's like Kris _was_ \-- trying desperately to earn his father's approval. He's in need of some separation from his father and some enlightenment. Probably a few months out here would do him good."

"What about his friends?"

"Some of them are just ugh. To be honest, I'm surprised Kris was ever friends with them." Lane shook her head. Had Kris been in denial about them? "But a few are totally cool with it -- or at least they are now. They miss Kris. And this one friend -- he must've told me six times that he wants Kris to call. He should call them." 

"Wow. Thanks for that. Thanks for everything. Just... thanks..." Adam said softly as he leaned against the counter and digested the information and gave thanks anew that he had an amazing circle of support in his friends and family. Well, except for Neil, but every family had their own Neil. "You know on the one hand, I'm glad to get confirmation that Kris is for real. It's a relief for me. On the other hand, your interviews...aren't uniformly going to be a relief for Kris, are they?" 

Lane rummaged around in her tote and pulled out her camera. Handing it to Adam, she suggested, "When you were ignoring me last night, I edited short versions. I'll upload the full interviews to your laptop while you're watching, okay?" 

"Great. Kris might want to watch them for himself. Maybe? What do you think?" 

"That's why I made short versions -- he can check those out and decide if he wants to watch the entirety. Because some he may not want to. But... How are you going to tell him?" Lane bit her lip. "Do you think he'll be angry with us?"

Adam looked up. "Oh. I told him last night. He told me that Hannah told him what we were doing."

"That bloody backstabbing _bitch!_ " Lane squawked, slapping her hand on the table. "What if Kris had been a bad guy -- he could've contacted people back in Toad Suck, Arkansas and--" 

Adam nodded absently as Lane ranted; if Hannah and Lane were guys, he'd say they were locked in an endless pissing match. He focused on the small screen. His heart was pounding and even though he should be freezing, his body was burning up and he was just on this edge of breaking a sweat. He knew it, had known in his heart -- probably from the first day -- that Kris was true, but now... Having confirmation would be not the sundae, just the cherry on top. 

 

Kris winced at the slight soreness as he rolled over in bed, glad he hadn't been a virgin last night because day-umm. Those pictures had indeed been a lie. But why had he woken up? Oh... He paused as he heard his phone vibrate, then pulled the pillow over his head. He'd just wait for Adam to get back in bed and then...

 

Lane looked around and nodded when she saw Adam's laptop on the kitchen counter. Taking a flash drive out of her bag, she worked on the computer, then poured herself some coffee to drink while waiting for Adam to finish. She watched his face, alternately amused, thoughtful, angry and confused and knew he was probably feeling a deeper version of her own reaction of relief and pride in the accuracy of their instincts combined with sadness for the pain Kris must have experienced.

"That's...it." Adam looked up. He sighed, then smiled. Kris' parents were pieces of work, but the Kris spoken of in these interviews was...just Kris. The man he seemed to be was indeed the man he was. Plus a little more aggressiveness and a little more insecurity. Well, having to make it on your own after being rejected by your family would do that. Putting the camera down, he put his free hand over his heart. "No skeletons in the closet."

"The only skeleton in the closet is the boner you get when you look at your latest custom leather jacket hanging there."

"Oooh, good one, Laney. You're on a roll this morning." Adam rolled his eyes. "Speaking of which, you have an appointment at Skingraft for a fitting. My gift to you for going to Arkansas. Wait. Toad Suck?"

"That's a real town!" Lane laughed at Adam's delayed reaction. She could tell he was still processing those videos, even if he was conversing with her. His mind was churning. She said softly, "And thanks for the new jacket. And the bonus. Now cleanse me of the detritus of provincial life by telling me the highlight of your no-doubt fabulous weekend." 

"We deflated Kris' bed." Adam laughed. 

 

"Mmmm..." Kris moaned softly as he slowly woke up in the best bed ever. So much better than his air mattress or sleeping bag or the back seat of his car. So big and comfy and... he pulled a pillow closer... smelled so good. Smelled like... Adam. "Adam?" Kris asked, his voice husky. Instead of hearing Adam's voice, Kris heard his phone vibrating again.

"Ugh. Leave me alone." Kris sighed as he rolled over, ignored his vibrating phone, and got out of bed to use the bathroom. As he pulled on his jeans, his stomach growled. He smiled. He could make Adam breakfast. If he could find the guy. Adam's bedroom was bigger than his whole apartment! Maybe he could just move in here and Adam wouldn't even notice? Or maybe...Kris looked longingly back at the bed... He would notice and want him to stay. 

 

"Seriously, though, Lane. His parents -- they really kicked him out with no remorse. I know it happens, but..." 

Lane nodded. Although Adam had so many friends with a similar story, his own parents and his own experience were so different and his own heart was so welcoming, the notion of throwing away your own child was such a foreign concept as to be incomprehensible. "His father has no remorse, no second guessing. Kris is dead to him unless he conforms to his rules. His mother -- I think she struggled then and now." 

"This..." Adam nodded in the direction the camera he'd set on the counter and the laptop. "This is a struggle or, well, complicated, isn't it? On the one hand, I'm happy that Kris is indeed just who he said he was and I'm not too proud to say that the confirmation of my instincts is something I did need. Or want. Or need. But it's not about me any more, is it?"

"No, it's not. On the way home, I was considering how the proof that Kris is a good guy is also proof that his home isn't his home any more." Lane sighed. 

"Exactly. Those interviews are proof that most of the people Kris loved rejected him. It's one thing to know or remember, it's another thing entirely to have videotaped proof. I don't know that he needs to _see_ that, you know?" Adam stopped and stared at the camera. "My initial reaction is to just delete it so he can't see it. But that's wrong."

Lane nodded. "I know, I know. You want to protect him, but..."

"But that's presumptuous. And paternalistic. He's had enough of that. I need to think about, decide how to tell him. Then the decision is-" 

 

"Decide what?" Kris asked, leaning against the doorjamb. He hoped he looked nonchalant, because having overheard Adam talking about making a decision and how to tell him, he felt anything but calm. Oh god... And seeing Lane there, looking anxious? "And Lane, why are you here so early and is that coffee I smell and Adam, why weren't you in bed with me when I woke up? And what decision?" Kris gulped. Was this the end-- well, if so, better to just get it over with. "Did you sleep with me and now you're gonna dump me?"

" _Whaaat?_ Are you sleepwalking out of a bad dream?" Adam shook his head. Kris must need some coffee. Or a dose of reassurance. "Listen, listen. Remember I told you that I was having Lane do a background check on you?" he began. When Kris nodded and shoved his hands in his jean pockets, Adam continued, "Well, she returned from Arkansas last night and has interviews on the camera. I want to say up front that you may be angry or upset and --"

"You went to _Arkansas_?" Kris asked in shock, turning to stare at Lane. All they'd done was go to Arkansas? Not what he'd thought at all. He heaved a sigh of relief.

"Well, yes. I thought Hannah the blabbermouth told you?" Lane asked, glancing at Adam, who was looking as confused as she felt.

"She told me you were running a background check, but she never told me about a trip to Arkansas!" Arkansas? Kris slumped against the doorjamb. He'd thought... Better not to assume, better to ask. "What's the deal with Lane going to Arkansas?"

Taking a deep breath, Adam started over. "Lane is a good judge of character. For example, she always disliked my old boyfriend--"

"I... don't get where this is going." Feeling his relief drain away in inverse proportion to his anxiety rising, Kris blurted out, "Is this leading up to you telling me that Lane thinks I'm scum?"

"No!" Lane exclaimed. Looking from one man to other, she murmured, "Excuse me...." Biting her lip, she stood up and walked quietly out of the room to leave them alone. Adam had said Kris could get prickly, but she'd never expected he'd jump to that sort of conclusion. She hoped Adam knew how to soothe Kris' anxiety.

"You really have a tendency to leap to worst case scenarios, don't you?" Adam shook his head, tossed the dishtowel onto the kitchen island and walked toward Kris. He wrapped one arm around Kris' body and pulled him close, while using his right hand to tip Kris' chin up to look at him. "Listen, my little hedgehog. I'm not going to throw you out. Okay? I'm not your parents or... some of your friends back in Stumptoe." 

"I come from Conway," Kris mumbled against Adam's bare chest. "Or rather, I _came_ from there. Now, I come from here."

"Gopher Flats, Stumptoe, Conway, whatever..." Adam took a deep breath. "Lane said it reminded her of Petticoat Junction." 

Kris froze. What was he supposed to say to this, to any of that? Then again, there was nothing in Conway of concern to anyone. Right? Right? "Lane said.... Lane really was in Conway. She went there to... Ohmigod, she talked to my family. Friends. Or used to be, right?" Kris knew he was standing there no doubt looking like a fish who was just this edge of becoming Sunday dinner, gaping with his mouth open. But the thoughts swirling around in his brain... So confusing. Irritation, guilt, fear, relief... "What did she say -- how did she get to talk to people..."

""She said you had auditioned for American Idol and that the producers thought you could do well. That they wanted to make sure you didn't have any skeletons in your closet before they thrust you into the living rooms of America's heartland."

"Oh. Rather than auditioning for your boyfriend, I was auditioning for the show!" Kris grinned as Adam grimaced guiltily. "Well, that was a good way to approach it-- sure to bring out any vultures."

"Exactly. That was the plan." 

"So....When did you know -- when did Lane..." Kris swallowed. She had talked to his parents. His parents. His brother. His friends. People he hadn't spoken with or rather, who hadn't spoken _to_ him in two years. People he'd tried to forget about were in that computer, that camera. Talking. 

"Lane got back last last night, but I had my phone turned off."

Kris nodded. He wished he could turn this all off. He wished he didn't even know. "I am so into turning off annoying phones. But you spoke with her while she was away?"

"She told me it was going well, but--"

"Wait. So last night.... you didn't have proof, but you..." Kris paused as he remembered the look on Adam's face when he had thrown down the video game controller and reached for him. The look on his face when he had reassured Kris that they were boyfriends, the look on his face when he had been inside him for the first time, the look on his face when he had told Kris he was running a background check before sliding inside him. He had thought long ago that Adam had his own form of honor and -- 

"Oh, I get it." Kris smiled again in relief and rested his forehead against Adam's shoulder, then turned his head and kissed the closest freckle. "You were testing yourself, weren't you? You felt bad you've been testing me, so you did it to yourself, didn't you?"

"I...Yeah, I guess I did. Not consciously, but you're right...." Adam looked at Kris in astonishment. Why wasn't Kris getting more angry?

"I get you, Adam. I get the way your mind works." Kris smiled, he could not help but smile as he basked in the sudden warmth of Adam's own smile at his words. "It's okay that you checked me out. Back home people call up their great aunt or the nosy neighbor who knows all the dirt or we check out each other's Facebook pages. With your situation, it's a little more methodical, but same diff. But most importantly, last night, the night before -- You made a leap of faith, didn't you?"

"Yes, but--" Adam grunted as Kris flung his arms around him and squeezed tightly. 

"I know it was hard for you to do that..." Kris whispered. He could only hope Adam would show him grace when he needed it someday. But grace was a gift and you couldn't ask for it or earn it. 

"Well, it wasn't easy, but you deserved my faith," Adam said firmly. "Isn't that what faith is -- a gift?" 

Kris pondered for a moment and then shook his head. "Mebbe, mebbe not though. I think... A pastor back home once said that untested faith is too easy. Cheap. In the end, you chose to have faith even though yours had been tested. So I could get mad that you were checking out my story even though your experience has taught you the necessity of checking out stories. Which...." Kris rubbed his cheek against Adam's shoulder. "Which would be stupid, right? To ignore life's lessons. Speaking of which, I could I see it as a compliment to me that you chose to make that leap of faith before you knew the truth. Choices, right? Life is a series of choices."

"True..." Adam agreed. "That's what my dad always says." 

Kris nodded. Yup. Someone else had told him that and it was, damn him, true. Seeing the bemused look on Adam's face, Kris shut up. Damn, he'd been babbling, which meant he was nervous.

"I...wow. Thanks, Kris," Adam said softly. "For being understanding. But you're sure you're not angry?"

"No. But I could get angry if you keep asking me if I'm angry!" Kris rolled his eyes. He'd bet Adam had been talking to his brother. He'd been on Adam's end of enough conversations with his brother to have seen the pattern of Adam being calm on the phone, then agitated afterward. 

"Well, then we could have make up sex." Adam smiled. "But fair warning -- you can't bury your anger and then throw this up at me every time we fight."

"Fight, who us?" Kris smiled back. "We don't fight, we bicker. Totally different. And fair warning -- I do intend to tease you about this."

"I can't believe you're not ripping my nuts off."

"Well, that would only hurt me too, now wouldn't it?" Kris teased. "But seriously, I could get angry, but what would be the point -- I get why you did it. It makes sense. And how did it hurt me? Now, if you keep testing me in the _future_ , I'll get mad then. Understood? But for now, let's drop it, okay?"

"Yes." Adam sighed in agreement, although he knew he'd have to think more about this. Something didn't feel right. Or maybe that was his paranoia again. "Lane has interviews with your people. I don't know if you want to watch them or not..." 

**Thudthudthud**

Hearing Lane's footsteps coming down the tiled stairs, Adam jumped back toward the island, grabbed the towel and slapped it in place. 

Kris giggled at Adam's wince. Keeping his eyes on the mostly naked man in front of him, Kris grinned. Hey, how bad a morning could it be if he was staring at a mostly naked Adam Fucking Lambert? "Lane! You can come back. I want the details. Or... do I? Tell me what you think?" If Adam trusted Lane this much, then so did he. "And Adam, you too." 

"I edited little highlights of the interviews on to my camera. But... You're really cool with this?" Lane asked, making Kris jump as her voice came from behind him. "Let me have it too. It was my idea." 

"Eh, what _ever_." Seeing the identical looks of confusion on their faces, Kris asked grumpily, "What? What could Lane find out? That I was the most boring person in the history of Conway? But you already knew that--"

"Boring?" Lane and Adam echoed, staring at each other. 

"Boring?" Adam repeated. He didn't understand how Kris could leap to those crazy-ass conclusions and then be so laid-back finding out that Lane had investigated him by talking to friends and family. "How the hell could you be boring when you so seldom do what I expect?"

"You're confusing me. Which happens..." Kris admitted, rubbing his eyes, then making his fingers dance through the air, continued, "Which happens because your mind just dances along like oil on a griddle whereas mine just rolls along. Usually in the path of least resistance. But right now, I need coffee. And my glasses." Kris rubbed his eyes again and peered nearsightedly at Adam. "Because it looks like you've been standing in your kitchen -- with Lane -- wearing only a dishtowel?" 

"Ohmigod, I forgot again!" Adam exclaimed. "Lane, why didn't you--"

"You were busy telling me about your busy busy weekend with your boyfriend, remember?" Lane griped back. "A great weekend you had, dancing, dining and boinking, while I was in Pickles Gap eating chits or grits and some nasty green _stuff_ because I was trying to meet the locals, then having some lady with honest-to-god blue hair lecture me about unicorns being the mark of the devil--" 

"Pickles Gap?" Kris rubbed the back of his neck, then slumped with relief. Adam hadn't found out something horrible, hadn't dumped him or thrown him out. It must be okay if Adam was busy blushing about his dish towel and Lane was bitching about Pearline. Which... the first one was only the complex contradiction that was the real Adam Lambert and the second one was only fair. Because Pearline was an unChristian bitch. "I thought you went to Conway."

"I was joking." Lane got up and poured another cup of coffee and handed it to Kris who smiled at her gratefully.

"Oh. I thought you went to Pickles Gap too. Well, if you ate in Conway but didn't like the collard greens, you musta eaten at the Lumberjack-- they don't make collard greens with pork fat, which is key. The other, well, they're chitlins, which are an acquired taste," Kris admitted, pausing to take another sip of his coffee. Thank god. He needed the caffeine to handle this news about Lane going back to h-- Conway. "And some people say grits are too, which I don't get."

"People say that about sushi," Lane noted. "But I liked that the first time I tried it."

"Me too! Go figure." Kris shrugged. He'd much rather talk about the town crazies than the people he loved who rejected him. Now that the crisis was over, he'd rather ignore the fact that Lane had talked to his familiy. "The lady with the blue hair was Pearline and she's craaaaaaazy. Ohmigod-- did you interview her?"

"Yes. I have her on my camera."

"I totally gotta see that. She and her husband have their own church, with snakes and-- " 

"Ah! I could've sworn she mumbled something about asking the snakes, but I thought it was just my overactive imagination--"

"Nope. She's for real. The only people who shop at her store are her parishioners. Kinda a requirement for belonging to her church."

"That's--"

" _Fascinating!"_ Adam said sarcastically. "But. I. Am. Still. Naked!" He pointed out. "Can someone..." He glared at Lane. "Either look away?" He glared at Kris. "Or could someone go grab me, oh, I don't know, a pair of pants?!"

"I'm good with the way you are right now, actualllllly..." Kris drawled, looking Adam up and down deliberately and slowly. "I don't see much need to get you into a pair of pants. Nope. I'm feelin' fiiiiiiiiine with the way things are right now. You could stay that way allllll day. We can watch all of Lane's interviews and no matter what anyone says, I'll stay _happy_. Ooh yeah, reallllly happy." 

Lane giggled. When Adam slanted her a look, she pressed her lips together. "I guess I could go earn my keep -- some more, since traveling to Hicksville wasn't enough--" She paused, then sighed. When Adam just stared at her, she smiled. "Okay, I'll go get you some jeans, Adam. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll make a lot of noise on my way back." 

"Excellent!" Kris said with a grin. "Because I see a dish towel with my name on it."

Lane laughed and darted away. Kris sat down his coffee cup, reached out and snatched the towel, shoving it into his back jeans pocket. "I'm keeping this for special times."

"Oh?" Adam grinned, then laughed aloud as Kris once again wrapped his arms around him and held on, this time sliding his hands down to squeeze Adam's ass. "What would those be?"

"I can be the cook and you can be the dishwasher."

"Have I mentioned that I like the way your mind works?" Adam asked before his mouth was occupied with kissing Kris.

**Thudthudthud**

"Mmm..." Kris smiled as Adam pulled back. "I can't wait to cook for you." 

_Plop_

A pair of Adam's jeans went sailing into the room. Adam grabbed them off of the floor and quickly pulled them on, before calling Lane back in. 

"Here." Lane handed Kris' phone to him. "The phone was vibrating and fell off the nightstand so I picked it up. It was Geoffrey's office."

"Oh." Kris shoved the phone into his front jeans pocket.

"You... You didn't blow off session work for a dinner date, did you?" Adam asked, sitting down in a kitchen chair. 

While Lane scooted up onto the counter and reached for her coffee cup, Kris grinned and sat down on Adam's lap, smiling even more broadly when Adam immediately put his arm around him and pulled him closer. He had the best seat in the house. Warmest too.

"I asked you a question, Kris," Adam reminded him. Kris needed the money and the last thing he wanted Kris to do was lose music opportunities. 

"I..." Kris flushed. "Well, I didn't blow IT off." He grinned. When Adam kept staring at him, he dropped his eyes. Pulling Adam's free hand toward him, he began tracing the tattoos on the wrist and finally added, "I rescheduled. They weren't in any big hurry so I'm doing it later today--"

"Hannah let you reschedule?" Lane asked in surprise. "Hannah can be such a bitch to session musicians."

"Hannah isn't so bad!" Kris protested. When Lane and Adam both looked at him with disbelief, he squirmed. "I uh think...?"

"What the hell...oh!" Adam laughed. "Does Hannah like you?"

"No!" Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "I mean, she doesn't hate me. But she likes YOU. She...thinks we're a good match."

"Well...I"m glad she kept quiet about it." Adam smiled ruefully. "If she had tried to set us up, I would have refused."

"Yeah, I can see that. Out of sheer cussedness." Kris agreed. He smiled at Adam's snort and wiggled around in Adam's lap. There. Ha. And there. Oh yeah. Life was good. 

"Cussedness?" Adam heard his voice get higher at the end, but hell. Kris was a talented wiggler.

"Does that mean he swears a lot?" Lane asked, confused.

"No..." Kris lifted his hand from where it had been stroking the outline of Adam's tattoo to his face and gently stroked from the bridge of Adam's nose down to its tip, then along the edges of his lips. "It means he's stubborn enough that he'd cut off his nose to spite his face."

"Oh, he is that stubborn." Lane agreed, watching the bemused look on Adam's face as Kris touched him. Thank god Kris was really a good guy because Adam was head over heels for him.

"Lane..." Adam bit back a groan at the feel of Kris' fingers on his skin. "I can show Kris the interviews if he wants to see them. You have an appointment at Skingraft. You should be going." 

Lane grinned and stood up. When Adam stayed seated, her smile widened into a grin. "Aren't you going to walk me to the door like a good boy?" 

"If I stood up right now, I wouldn't be a good boy." Adam winked.

"And you wouldn't want me to report another inappropriate appearance of the glambulge." Lane giggled as she grabbed her bag and left the room. 

"She's wrong..." Kris wiggled around on Adam's lap, then slid off, to kneel between his legs. "There is nothing wrong with this appearance of the glambulge..." He reached for the zipper on Adam's jeans.

"The only thing that's wrong here is the location." Adam glanced at his computer, wondering if Kris was really so nonchalant about those interviews or trying to distract himself or if his horniness was greater than his curiosity. Or all three. Well, Kris had a right to decide how long it would take to process this information and while he was processing.. "You promised me something last night." 

"I did?" Kris asked in puzzlement as Adam stood and pulled him up with him. "Did you seriously just turn down a blow job? You were saying that I made no sense when I didn't get mad at you, but you turn down a blow job? Talk about illogical and--" Kris gave into laughter when he realized Adam was once again hauling him down the hallway. "Uh-oh, you're leading me down the primrose path to perdition--" 

"If you want flowers on the damn bed, I can do that another time," Adam said absently as he looked from Kris' eager eyes to his laughing mouth. 

"I'm not a flower kinda guy. Hey. You never gave me a tour of your house..." Kris complained, grinning as Adam shoved him into the bedroom.

"The only thing you need to see right now is the inside of my shower."

"Shower?" Kris echoed as Adam slid his arms around him. 

"You promised me last night you'd show me how you've been fingering this ass..." Adam slid his hands over Kris' butt and pulled him up against him. "Prepping for me. I'm calling in that promise." 

"Oh!" Kris gulped. Damn Adam's focus. It was going to be his undoing some day. He had never touched himself in front of someone else. But then again, this was Adam. Adam who was -- unzipping Kris' jeans and pushing them down his legs. And looking at him with those eyes and... Kris sighed as he felt his balls clench up and his cock fill. Day-umm, all it took was a look and he was ready to do whatever Adam wanted. 

"I'm impatient. Move it." Adam slapped Kris' now bare ass. 

"Hey!" Kris laughed as he looked down at his butt and saw the faint red outline of Adam's hand. "You marked me."

"I think I'll have my hand print tattooed there..." Adam retorted as he tossed his own jeans aside. 

Only if, Kris thought, he could have a mark of his own tattooed on Adam's wrist. Then stopped thinking when Adam hauled him into the bathroom and he noticed the huge walk-in shower for the first time. No crappy shower curtain to fall down on his head here. 

"C'mon..." Adam walked into the glass-enclosed shower area and turned the multiple showerheads on to a hot setting.

"This is fucking awesome..." Kris breathed in excitedly as hot water streamed down from two showerheads coming from above and several more from the sides. 

"It will be fucking awesome watching you," Adam told Kris. He smiled as Kris' entire body flushed with what he could tell was a combination of embarrassment and arousal. One great aspect of being with a guy is that the signs of arousal were crystal clear. Speaking of which... Adam reached out and swiped his thumb over the head of Kris' erect penis, then brought his finger to his mouth and slowly licked it. "And tasting. But first the watching..." 

Kris blushed and wiped the water out of his eyes. His eyes automatically went to Adam's cock -- oh damn, that was so hot -- and then back up to Adam's face. "I can't do this--"

"You can. You will. You will do whatever I tell you to do. Won't you?" Adam pressed. When Kris bit his lip, Adam bent down and scraped his own teeth over the reddened lip, then sucked it into his mouth, before his tongue swept in and his arms encircled Kris, wet hands moving over wet flesh, before sliding between Kris' cheeks and pressing. "Won't you do this for me?" 

Kris moaned. "I will," he said in a low, almost guttural voice and reached between his legs, never taking his eyes away from Adam's. 

"Good, let's make ourselves all clean..." Adam grinned as he reached for the shower gel. 

Kris gulped as he looked down at Adam's cock. "I need more gel and... three fingers."


	17. Dusty disguises and dodging the issue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: NC-17  
> Italics = flashbacks.

**Chapter 17: Dusty disguises and dodging the issue  
Rating: NC-17**   
_Reminder: Italics = flashbacks._

"New customer," John said, motioning toward the door. "With his eye on you. Maybe it's your lucky night, but... Oh, that's right, you have...What's his name?"

"Adam?" Kris gaped. 

"Hi, stranger." John smiled automatically as the new customer -- who had kept his eyes on Kris the entire time he'd traversed the bar -- seated himself at the counter in front of Kris, which was a territory move if he'd ever seen one. "What can I get for you?"

"A...beer. Corona with lime, please."

"I can't believe you're here!" Kris shook his head. 

"You know him?" John asked, looking at Kris, while opening the bottle of beer. "Well, don't be a clodhopper. Introduce me to your friend."

"Oh, sure." Kris grinned and gestured at Adam, who was in his Dusty Madrid costume. "This is...Rocky Seville."

John nodded and handed the beer to Adam. "Rocky Seville. Wow, that's an interesting name. Mine is boring. Hi. I'm John the bartender."

"Hey." Adam grinned and pushed his hair over his shoulder, careful not to dislodge the hat. He looked over at Kris, who was obviously trying to compose his face to keep from laughing and then lost it.

"Excuse me!" Kris choked out, stumbling toward the back room. Why had he told Adam to keep away from the bar before? He bent forward, laughing. His life had gotten so much more entertaining since he'd met Adam.

 

_  
"How are you not gonna get mobbed when we go to Universal?" Kris asked earlier the week before as he opened the door to Adam's knock. He looked Adam up and down and smiled. Damn, he liked tighter than tight jeans on his boyfriend. Boyfriend. Hee._

_"I have a plan." Adam held up his backpack as Kris closed his apartment door behind him._

_"Let me guess. It involves a costume." Kris grinned. "I can't wait to see this. I hope it involves glitter. I like your glitter eyeshadow."_

_"You mock me." Adam sniffed. "But it has worked." He rummaged around in his backpack. "And it's way too early in the morning for glitter eyeshadow. Time and place, Kristopher. Time and place."_

_"Ohmigod, is it that Dusty Madrid get up?" Kris laughed again as Adam pulled out a trucker hat. "Ohmigod, I can't wait to see it. Go ahead, go ahead...show me. How you transform your glam self into trailer trash." Kris flung himself down into his mushroom chair and slung a leg over the arm, swinging it back and forth. As Adam glared at him, he gestured with his hand. "Go ahead. Entertain me. Or I'll just entertain myself by ogling your ass. Good times."_

_Adam sighed as he pulled out a white tee-shirt and plaid cotton button-up shirt. Glancing up, he caught Kris' avid gaze on his ass and smiled. "I'm not doing a strip tease to music for you, you know."_

_"Don't need to. I'm enjoying the view regardless..." Kris leered as Adam unbuttoned his jeans. Rubbed his palm over his dick, he suggested, "You know, we could have a quickie before we go. C'mere."_

_Glancing over at Kris lounging in his chair, Adam smiled, then shuddered. Talk about Beauty and the Beast. "Not on that chair."_

_Kris jumped up and hurried around to the back of the chair. Putting his hands on the top edge, he leaned over and wiggled his butt. "C'mon. You could bend me over the chair--"_

_"Yeah, if you stood on a step stool." Adam teased. He gestured up and down his legs, the pointed from his hip bone to Kris'. "Notice that our hips are about six inches apart."_

_"I'm not looking at your hip bone..." Kris retorted as he stared at Adam's crotch as Adam pulled down his zipper._

_"Well, you consider how to fix this logistical problem while I continue changing," Adam suggested as he shoved his own jeans down and reached for Dusty's. Kris would appreciate it more if he had to wait. Dani's mom had always told her that and Dani had told him more than once that it was totally true. Plus Kris was so damn hot with the way he moaned and wiggled and pushed himself on Adam's cock that a quickie wasn't even possible with him. Adam just wanted to do it over again each time he made Kris come. Well, they could do two quickies... Hmm._

_Sighing loudly, Kris flung himself back into his chair while planning on buying a step stool. "By the way, that shirt looks too new. I think you should borrow one of my old plaid shirts," he offered._

_"Are you seriously criticizing my trailer park clothes?"_

_"I don't think they're trashy enough. And sweetie, I'm from Arkansas. I know from trailer park trash."_

_"You know, I don't think you should be mocking my trash level, given that chair."_

_"Leave my chair alone." Kris glared at Adam. He liked his chair. "It's comfy." Plus Adam had been sitting in this chair the first time he'd had given Kris a blow job, the best damn blow job in the history of blow jobs. Good memories. He was getting so many good memories to keep these days._

_"It's hideous--" Adam paused. Kris was so damn enamored of that fugly chair, but it hurt his eyes to look at it. It was almost as bad as this chair with a huge floral print at his grandmother's... "Wait. I have an idea."_

_"If it's as good as your Dusty costume, I can hardly wait."_

_Adam adjusted the wig on his head and then shoved the hat down hard. "My grandma does that thing with needles--"_

_"Shoots heroin?"_

_"You're not as funny as you think you are. She knits or something. She makes afghans that she puts over the chairs and sofas. She could make you one."_

_Kris' foot stopped swinging. "I realize you're offering it solely as a means to cover up what you think are my ugly mushrooms, but I'll take it and ...Oh." Kris smiled and reached out to slap Adam on the butt. Adam was probably thinking Kris should use some warmth in his life and the afghan from his grandmother would be a good way to get it. "You're not making that offer solely to cover up--"_

_"The fucking ugliest chair in the history of the universe." Adam bent over and laced up his boots. Kris could keep his ugly chair and his pride if he accepted the idea of making a new family for himself. "My ulterior motive is that if you take one of her afghans, then I don't have to. She's always looking for people to give them to and I can't ever say no. So if you take one, you'd be doing me a favor."_

_"Sure." Kris tilted his head and then sighed loudly. "I'm not in favor of how loose your jeans are. I mean, if you're not gonna give me a quickie this morning, you owe me one of the major perks of dating Adam Fucking Lambert, which is seeing his seriously awesome ass up close and personal whenever I want."_

_Adam laughed. "You'll survive the trauma."_

_"I may not. I may go into ogling-Adam's-ass withdrawals."_

_"Are_ you _the one shooting heroin?"_

_"Well, I'm not the one shooting into an ass."_

_"You haven't asked." Adam tugged his wig left and right._

_"Well, I can't now that you you're wearing that godawful wig_ and _brought your grandmother into the conversation. I take it she's alive and well?"_

_"Sure. You'll meet her and the rest of my family -- well, my west coast family -- at Thanksgiving."_

_"I will?" Kris gulped._

_"Well, yeah. Of course. My mom and Neil will be at my Halloween party, but everyone will be at Thanksgiving and --" Adam stopped when he saw the gobsmacked look on Kris' face and groaned. "Of course, if you don't want to go to Thanksgiving, that's fine. But I thought..." He shook his head. "Sorry. I won't push--"_

_Kris wiggled his eyebrows. "In case you haven't noticed, I like it when you push."_

_"I've noticed and I enjoy your enthusiasm." Adam lowered his voice and mumbled in a southern accent, "Oh, thass it, push harder, sweetie, right....there...."_

_"You bitch." Kris laughed._

_"But about Thanksgiving -- I'm being bossy again."_

_"No, that's not it. I've..." Kris smiled. He'd spent the last two holidays alone and it would be wonderful to... actually have a reason to give thanks this year. "It would be awesome. Thanks."_

_"Don't thank me until after you've met my brother." Adam grimaced as he walked over to the bathroom to adjust his wig yet again. "I swear, one of these years..."_

_"One of these years, you'll get ready and we can go to Universal!" Kris exclaimed impatiently. "C'mon! If we're not having sex this morning, I want to go on that studio tour bad. And see that King Kong 3-D!"_

_"I'm ready." Adam shrugged as he looked down at himself. "What more do I need but a plaid shirt, loose jeans, my brother's shit-kicking boots, my hat and my wig?"_

_"That's it? You think that's gonna hide you?" Kris looked disbelievingly at Adam. Did he have no idea how gorgeous he was? Even with that stupid wig?_

_Adam felt his cheeks flush with pleasure at the heated look Kris was giving him, even in this stupid costume. "Sure." Adam held out a hand and when Kris took it, pulled him up in one fast move. "Give me a kiss. I've changed my mind. We can totally do a quickie. I'm up for it."_

_"Fuggitaboutit!" Kris fell forward laughing, then pushed away. "Dusty is not getting lucky with me."_

_"Oh, really?" Adam grabbed for Kris, who darted away, hiding behind the chair as Adam chased after him._

__

 

Kris wiped his eyes. He was the lucky one. Damn, it was never boring around Adam. Why hadn't that guy had a boyfriend before? It must have been the universe making sure Adam was available. Then again, that hat was like a natural gay repellent. 

Although... Adam in that hat had teased him their entire visit to Universal, making him walk around half-hard and wishing he had on loose jeans himself -- until they got back to his apartment and he was glad he could easily get out of them. And Adam got rid of that hat. They'd had two quickies that afternoon. None on the chair though. Adam really hated that chair. He needed to buy that step stool. He started laughing again, this time from sheer happiness.

"What's up with him?" John asked in confusion as he heard Kris' laughter resume. 

"He thinks my hat is ridiculous." Adam pointed toward his trucker's hat. 

"Well, it does have rhinestones." John froze as he realized he might have insulted Kris' friend. And a customer. "Not that there's anything wrong with that," he said quickly as Kris approached. "Then again, why would Kris care? He'd have to stand on a step stool to see it." 

Kris shook his head, then backed up as he once again burst out laughing. He covered his face and went back into the small room behind the bar, his laughter riding under the noise of the bar like an undertow. John looked in Kris' direction, then back in Rocky's. When had he seen Kris that loose? Like never, except for when he'd gotten that fruit basket gift. 

Adam sighed. "Apparently I'm not getting lucky tonight. Not the first time this hat has ruined my chances." 

"Are you Kris'....friend? An old friend?" John asked, carefully.

"Why?"

"Well, if you came in thinking to start things up again, not that I knew Kris was dating anyone before, because he's like the Cryptkeeper when it comes to his private life --"

"Cryptkeeper?" Adam cracked up. Oh, he was so using that name. And he was going to keep this John talking. He had info.

"Well, anyway, I don't think it's gonna happen."

"Why not?"

"He's dating this new guy and frankly, he's -- as my daughter would say -- _totally_ into him. I'm not trying to talk out of turn, but no point in wasting your time with Kris." 

"Thanks for the advice. But, totally into him, hmm?"

"Totally. No offense, but I'm glad to see it. Kris seemed so closed off and now he's more open, happy, enjoying himself so to tell the truth..." John paused. He probably shouldn't keep yapping, but... "Holy shit. You should be a bartender yourself. There's something about you that... I just keep talking."

"I've been told that before." 

"Well, it's a good quality in a bartender. You ever been one?"

"Actually, that is one job I've never done," Adam admitted. "I hear you can make good money at it."

"Sometimes. More at private parties than a local dive like this one. Kris should really become a cater waiter or a private party bartender, he's good looking enough for it-- Not like me..." John patted a belly that was happy evidence of his wife's good cooking and looked up as Kris returned. John smiled as moved down the bar to talk to another customer now that Kris was back. It was a slow night, so if Kris wanted to -- shockingly enough -- talk to a friend -- like John had any idea Kris had friends -- it was okay. Good for the kid, too.

"Hey, didn't you have to work in the studio tonight?" Kris asked in a low voice. "Is everything okay?"

"It's... fine." Adam began, then smiled sheepishly when Kris slanted him a knowing look. He smiled again, this time aiming at Kris. He liked how Kris could read him so easily. "Okay, it's not fine. The music just isn't working for me. I need to think about it and..." Adam smiled. "Truth is--"

"You think by talking." Kris nodded. "But... wouldn't you be better off talking to your producer or one of your forty million friends in the music business?"

"That's what I've been doing for a few days now -- no, that's a lie. For weeks," Adam admitted. "Monte told me to go chill. I need to be with someone who doesn't know every detail about my current music and just... He's right. I just need to chill right now."

"I can be chill." Kris nodded, crossed his arms across his chest and nodded.

Adam rolled his eyes and grinned at the signs of incipient laughter on Kris' face. "Yeah, you're chill."

"Hey--" Kris grinned as he delivered an obligatory protest.

"You're cute and funny, hedgehog. And mostly easy-going. Chill you're not, though. But..." Adam looked carefully around, then touched Kris' hand. "You are hot. Which my music is not. I need to leave it alone. Let everything I've been thinking about and feeling... coalesce." He smiled at Kris, whose presence both energized and calmed him simultaneously.

"Sure. Just like when you're in school and you can't figure out a math problem and then you go to bed, but when you wake up, it makes sense?" Kris nodded as someone at the bar held up an empty glass and moved toward the taps. As long as he'd known Adam and that was now more than three months, Adam never hesitated to talk about anything -- including the interviews in his computer that Kris _needed_ to see, so he must be really frustrated. "So you don't want to talk about it right now?"

"Not right now." Adam raised his voice to a normal tone. "You're a bartender, you must know everyone's story. So make like the piano-man, Billy Joel, and tell me the tale of everyone here." 

"Well...." Kris grinned as he handed the customer a glass of beer, then playfully shoved his fellow bartender on his way back to Adam's spot. Without thinking, he sang, "John at the bar is a friend of mine..."

"He gives you your your drinks for free?" Adam sang back, noting John's look of surprise at Kris' singing, then his double-take at Adam's. Oh crap. Well, whatever. Kris' voice was actually pretty good. Hmm. He should - No, Adam, don't go there and -- He went there. "Hey, you play piano. You should have one in here. Make more tips." 

"Whoa. Wait." John turned from staring at Adam to glare at Kris and slam a glass on the counter. "Kris plays piano? Kris sings?"

"You didn't know..." Adam snapped his gaze to Kris. "Why didn't he know? Why? Why keep your life in little boxes like that?" That was, damn it, what Kris had done in Arkansas. Bad habit.

"It wasn't important." Kris pressed his lips together, then forced himself to relax. He liked having his life in little compartments and ... Wait a fucking minute. He realized suddenly that was how he'd lived in Arkansas. And that had worked so well? He needed to rethink it.

"It wasn't important?" 

Kris looked wide-eyed at John. "Is there an echo in here? I never knew."

Adam frowned at Kris. Kris shouldn't have kept his music some state secret. That wasn't the way to get a break and in the music business, you never knew how or through whom that break would come. "And John here never knew you played piano. Do you know that he plays guitar?"

"He did mention that he played around with the guitar." John snapped a towel at Kris' leg. "What else you been keeping from me?"

"Yeah, Kris. What else?" Adam smirked. "But hey, John. Maybe we can share information on the Cryptkeeper here. Tell me what you do know." 

"Cryptkeeper?" Kris echoed. John had called him that once -- had John told Adam that? Oh shit, what else had John told Adam? 

"I know he loves football and baseball. I know he has too much pride."

" _Preach_ it." Adam held up his hand and John high-fived it.

"Shove it." Kris glared from John to Adam, then stomped off. He had to think about this box business.

Adam looked at Kris, realizing he had probably pushed too far and debating if he should follow him or not.

"Leave him," John suggested while glancing curiously at the silver rings on Rocky's hand. Weird combo, those silver rings and a trucker hat, but whatever. Took all kinds. "He does have too much pride and he needs to get over it. I'm an atheist, but jealousy is called a deadly sin for a damn good reason." 

"So how do you know he has too much pride?"

"Ah. There's a story."

"Apparently..." Adam drawled as he looked toward the direction Kris had flounced off. "I have the time." 

 

_  
Looking carefully at the skinny kid who'd clearly been living in a rattletrap of a truck he'd been stashing in the alley, John paused. The kid was pretending to work on his truck, probably to keep from being called in for being a transient. He'd watched the kid on and off for a few days now. He was dirty and twitchy, but he wasn't strung out. Probably terrified and hungry. Years of hard times and its sister, necessity, had given him the ability to quickly assess character and this kid just looked like he needed a break._

_"Get away, you fucker!" Kris yelled as he kicked at the rat who'd been sniffing around his sneakers. It was a sad and sorry situation when the rats thought you were one of them._

_"Hey, son..." John called out, taking one step closer, but no more. "You wanta earn a few bucks?"_

_"Who, me?" Kris scowled at the older and much bigger guy. Damn, he wished he were bigger._

_"I'm not talking to your friend, Ben."_

_"Ben?"_

_"The rat, Ben, from the Michael Jackson song. I'm not talking to the rodent. So yeah. I'm talking to you. Do you want to make a few bucks?"_

_"Doing what? I'm not doing anything illegal. Or sucking your dick." Kris glared. Not yet. Although he was getting desperate enough to take up on those offers... No, no, he wasn't. He still had some morals. No matter what his father said._

_"Can you pour beer?"_

_"Sure. Who can't?"_

_"The guy I just fired. Are you over twenty-one?" When the young man nodded, John continued. "Good. I need someone for the night shift. As in two hours from now. I'll pay you cash. Plus tips."_

_"I... could do that. But..." Kris flushed. "I'm not really..." He looked down. He was filthy. And smelled. One reason he couldn't find another job after he'd lost that cash-under-the-table janitorial job to someone who'd work cheaper. But he still didn't know how you could work cheaper. And eat. And have a place to live. Hence the living in a truck. WIth only the clothes on his back and his guitar since his landlord had confiscated his other belongings when he'd changed the locks for non-payment of rent._

_"There's a little bathroom at the bar. With a shower and everything. We keep it in case some drunk vomits on one of us. You're welcome to use it. Plus the washing machine back there."_

_"I don't want your charity!"_

_"Son. You may not want it, but you look like you could use it," John said quietly. "Now, you decide which is more important. Your pride or some money in your pocket."_

_"Why... Why are you helping me? What do you really want?" Kris stayed behind his truck. He'd already learned that people often offered to help only because they wanted something from you._

_John nodded. "I can see you've learned some life lessons on the street. So did I. I'm helping you out because I was once in your shoes and someone helped me out. Seems only fair."_

_"Oh." Kris looked down. "Well. I'll think about it."_

_"You do that." John turned around to hide his smile. The poor kid had more pride than sense. "When you're done thinking, knock on the back door and I'll show you to the bathroom."_

"So I guess he knocked on the door."

"Nope." John shook his head. Seeing the sympathetic look in the stranger's eyes, John continued. "I went back out there and told him he either needed to come in and take the job or I was calling the cops because the spot next to the dumpster with the scenic view of the rat's nest was..." John made air quotes with his hands. "Employee parking. So he came in, took a shower, ate the sandwich my wife made me 'cause it's not like I couldn't afford to skip a meal and... And then he kinda lived in our backroom for a while -- until he could use me as a reference and got that morning job at McDonald's and could scrape enough for an apartment--" John broke off as a man down the bar yelled for him to turn on Jay Leno because it was Tuesday and he wanted to watch the Jaywalking segment. 

"He was living in his car?" Adam asked softly after John finished changing the channel. Kris had never once even alluded to the fact that things had gotten that bad. 

"Oh, crap, you didn't know?" John slapped his forehead. "Please, don't tell him I told you. That whole pride thing."

"Oh, I know. I understand male pride. I won't say a word. I promise." Adam used his hand to make a criss-cross over his heart. He wouldn't, although he hoped Kris would someday soon feel comfortable enough to offer the information. 

Staring into the stranger's eyes, John nodded. The guy looked trustworthy. Stupid hat. Kind eyes. "I believe you. Thanks."

"So you like Kris a lot?" Adam asked, pulling out his phone to glance at the time. Hurry up, Kris.

"Yeah. Nice guy. Hard worker. Very quiet -- except for when football is on. Then he'll get loud. Until lately. But aside from that... " John smiled as Kris walked back up to the bar. "Done with your hissy fit?"

Adam choked on his drink. Talk about no filter -- John was even worse than he was.

Flushing with embarrassment, Kris apologized. "Sorry about that. I... guess I do need to work on that pride thing."

"John here pointed out it's supposed to be a deadly sin," Adam added.

"You just have to push, doncha?" Kris rolled his eyes.

"As I recall...." Adam said drily as he stood up and walked toward the darker end of the bar counter. "You used to like it when I pushed."

Kris blinked, then cracked up, following Adam down the length of the counter. 

"Oooh-hoo!" John chortled, then looked down the bar as a few guys laughed at the Leno show. He sighed. "Not a Leno fan myself."

"He's a nice guy," Kris blurted out.

"The gig is up." Adam groaned and rolled his eyes. Under his breath, he muttered, "What is this -- the No-Filter Bar?"

"How did you meet Leno?" John asked. "And why didn't you tell me?"

"I thought you didn't like him," Kris retorted, hoping he could distract John. He glanced cautiously at Adam, who was downing the rest of his bottle of beer. He waited, then heaved a sigh of relief when Adam merely handed him the bottle with a smile. 

"But still!" John protested, glancing up at the screen. He froze, then his jaw dropped. He looked from Adam to Kris and back again. "Oh! You two were at Universal when he was doing one of those Jay Walking bits? That's how Kris met Leno?"

"Yup." Adam nodded. He groaned silently as he felt his phone vibrate, then vibrate again, then vibrate again. Sliding his hand into his pocket, he turned the phone off. "Hey, Kris, I'm sorry if I pushed too far before. I do that sometimes, get too aggressive--"

"It's okay, Adam." Kris squeezed Adam's hand reassuringly. "Sometimes, I need pushing." He winked. "Like say, later tonight?"

"Hey, that looks like...." John began, then quieted as the bit went on. As it reached his conclusion, he blinked in surprise when Leno announced, "Tune in tomorrow night when the singer in disguise as Dusty Madrid performs his latest hit right here on our stage. Can you guess who it is?"

"Told you that disguise wouldn't fool anyone," Kris taunted while reaching out to tug on Adam's wig. "Told ya. Ha!"

"Adam?" John echoed, his gaze snapping to look at Kris and the guy who... probably wasn't really named Rocky Seville. Adam, which was the name of Kris' boyfriend and the guy could sing and -- Kris' fruit basket had come with a card signed with initials... what were they and -- 

"Here he goes..." Kris warned. "He's gonna carry on...."

"Wait a minute! My wife... Adam-- but th..th...that's the name of your boyfriend!" John stammered as he hurried down to the end of the counter where Kris was leaning against the bar obviously annoying the guy in the hat who was... "Oh! Kris, you're dating... Adam Fucking Lambert?" John gasped in shock. 

Kris nodded. "Yeah, that's pretty much what I say every morning when I look into the mirror. 'Kris. you're dating Adam Fucking Lambert.'"

"Stop. It." Adam flicked Kris on the forehead. He turned and smiled at John, holding his hand out. "Sorry about the subterfuge before. Nice to meet you." 

John stared, then the words poured out as he rapidly shook Adam's hand. "You never I never Kris how did you meet him wait I bet -- that day you came in with the Starbucks cup and wait did he send you the obscene fruit basket ha that was funny the look on your face speaking of which the banana that's why you've been smiling and wow my wife...Oh crap my wife I should call her but you obviously want your privacy but my wife oh no what should could I...my wife..."

"His wife is a fan," Kris told Adam when John finally spluttered out of words.

"And apparently you like my banana." Adam winked at Kris.

Kris winked back and licked his lips. "Long creamy goodness." 

John elbowed Kris. "Can I have an autograph for her? No, I'm sorry, you're obviously trying to be incognito and I'm sorry. Oh hell, I just acted like a tourist." 

Adam smiled. "It's no problem. If you have a pen and something for me to write on, I'll be happy to do it." 

"Ohmigod, let me go find something in the office--" John ran off.

"I guess I'll watch the bar!" Kris called after him. He looked over at Adam. "You still don't think I should've agreed to let Leno run my two seconds of that piece, do you?"

"I don't think it was necessary. But I handled it. Last night."

"When you went to the drag show and someone accidentally let TMZ know you were going?" Kris smiled. Adam was so damn overprotective. "Sweetie..." he began, then laughed as the other bartender hurried toward them. The last time he'd seen John move that fast was when some guy had started vomiting on him. "Here's Johnny!"

"Can I take my picture with you? My wife doesn't believe me!" John asked eagerly.

Adam smiled and John handed his phone to Kris. Kris took the picture, then handed it back to John as Adam signed an autograph.

"I like him," John whispered under his breath. "He's a rich dude, right? But you'd never know it. No attitude." 

"He's bossy, but that's his natural default," Kris said in a clear voice. "Rich or poor, the guy is a bossypants."

"Bitch." Adam grinned at Kris as he handed the autograph over to John. "You'll pay for that."

"Thanks so much!" John carefully folded the autograph and put it into his shirt pocket.

"You're gonna get lucky thanks to that autograph, aren't you?" Kris asked, grinning at John's excitement.

"Hell, yeah. Hey...I should invite the two of you over to dinner sometime. My wife would freak!"

Kris laughed. "That'd be like that scene from Music and Lyrics when Drew Barrymore tells her sister that she knews Hugh Grant. Who was playing a character like Andrew Ridgely-- or was it George Michael?"

"Andrew Ridgely," Adam confirmed. Dani loved Hugh Grant movies and to his surprise the last time they'd had movie night and Dani had pulled out her favorite, Kris had eagerly joined in. Which had given him huge points in Dani's book. 

John wrinkled his forehead. "Is that a chick flick? I don't watch chick flicks." 

"You should. Women appreciate guys who watch chick flicks with them," Kris told him. He reached up and once again pulled on Adam's wig. He hated that damn thing. When you had hair like Adam's, it should be some sort of federal crime to cover it up. 

"Plus it tells you what women are looking for in romance." Adam pushed Kris' hand away and added, "Unless you want to be like Kris and read romance novels."

"What?" John gaped at Kris.

"What? Hey, I was sick. At home. Nuthin' to do..."

John shook his head. "Dude. You have a dick. There's always something to do." 

Adam burst out laughing. He liked John the bartender.

Kris nodded as a table full of guys called for a new round and pulled glasses. 

"So what happened in that movie when the Wham guy came home for dinner?" John asked.

Adam nodded as he recalled the movie from the last all-night all-Hugh Grant marathon Dani had called when she'd broken up with her last boyfriend. "Total hysteria. Change of clothes. Nearly-orgasmic excitement." 

John chuckled. "Hell, I might get that just from bringing home the autograph. But seriously, maybe if I invite you both, you can get Kris to come to my house. I'm starting to wonder if I have roaches or rats something. He won't ever come, even to a barbecue or Thanksgiving."

"I...uh..." Kris looked down, then off to the side. "I need to go get some more whiskey." 

"What's up with that? Seriously?" John asked, leaning over the wood. "Every time I've invited him home, he acts like that -- like someone just ran over his puppy. I've seen him eat -- he has table manners and doesn't seem to have any weird allergies or digestive problems. What's the deal?"

"He's...." Adam picked at his nail polish. John the bartender was a decent guy without an ounce of homophobia who obviously liked Kris. Kris could use more friends. Not that he was being bossy. It was just the truth. "Welllll... Why do you think a guy like Kris would reject your invitations?"

"Color me dumb, but I'm not getting it." John patted the counter. "C'mon." 

"Because he's gay."

"Huh?" John blinked. "I don't give rat's ass. Why would he think... Oh wait. He must've been rejected before. Did his family reject him? Because he's gay? Is that why he's been so cut off?"

"It's not my story to tell. But... good call, bartender." 

"Glad all those years of listening to people's stories and dispensing amateur psychology finally paid off. Plus my asshole cousin did that to his son. Asshole. Totally screwed up the kid for a few years." John set down another glass and looked in the direction of the store room. "If we ask you two over to dinner, like a barbecue, will you accept and make sure Kris comes?"

"I am nothing if not bossy and determined." 

"Great. How about you use that and go dig Kris out of the mines back there?"

"I'm also good at mining for buried treasure."

John cocked his head. For all that Adam's face looked bland, his eyes were dancing. John grinned at him. "Tell Kris he's on break. Fifteen minutes?"

"I'll make do." Adam grinned and flexed his fingers.


	18. Punked and painted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 18: Punked and painted  
Rating: PG-13**

 

_  
"And where are you from, Dusty and Kris?" Jay asked, trying his best to keep from laughing._

_"Teksszass...." Adam grinned and pulled on the bill of his hat. Brad was going to kill him for this atrocious accent. "We all jest moved out here to Cali-for-nee-ya this week."_

_"Dusty!" Two young women shrieked as they waved from the sidewalk at Universal Studios. "Dusty Madrid!"_

_"And...given that you're from Teksszass," Jay Leno drawled with a grin. "Just how do those young ladies know you?"_

_"Mah repudasheeun exceeds me." Adam nodded and rocked back and forth on his heels._

_Kris burst out laughing, then quickly ducked behind Adam's back and rested his forehead against Adam's shoulder while trying to stifle his guffaws. Ohmigod, ohmigod, he was going to give himself a hernia._

_"Somehow I doubt that your reputation is what's excessive on you," Jay remarked._

_The screen faded to the Tonight Show set, where Jay Leno announced, "Tune in tomorrow night when the singer in disguise as Dusty Madrid performs his latest hit right here on our stage. Can you guess who it is?"_

 

"Pffft!" Brad spewed his martini over the glittering glass surface of the bar counter before him. "Who was that?" He scrabbled for his phone and hit a speed dial number. 

"Allison --"

"I know! The boy! Do you know?"

"NO. Adam mentioned once -- oh, so casually, damn him -- that he had gone on a couple of dates with a new guy, but he never... That bitch!"

"Why didn't we know?"

"It can't be because we're indiscreet, because we have been the souls of discretion."

"Totally. It would be unfair to penalize us.... Stop giggling, you fool!" Alli sighed impatiently. "We deserve to be in the know!"

"I know! Who supported him when that guy turned out to be a golddigger?"

"And who went to court with him when he sued about those photos that asshole took while he was sleeping?"

"Forget invasion of privacy, how about defamation of character... or reputation--"

"You mean _repudasheeun_!" Allison giggled.

Brad groaned. "I so regret teaching him a Texas accent. Not that what he was doing was actually a Texas accent. And he can do a Texas accent but he's choosing not to and incidentally making Texans --"

"Like you give a rat's ass if Texas looks bad?"

"Don't confuse me with the facts when I'm on a rant. And since we've been left out of the information loop, right now I'm regretting going to court with him, but those photos were so wrong. I didn't have a choice. That angle and what it did to his cock, which I have to say from up close and personal experience is awe--"

"TMI!" Allison growled. She knew Brad was avoiding the issue since he was anxious about another guy hurting Adam. "Focus, you fool. Stop drooling over your memories and focus on the guy whose currently drooling over Adam's cock."

"Ouch!" Brad grinned. "Yeah, that's what I said the first time--"

"Yeah, yeah, you deserve a medal." Allison rolled her eyes. "Here's the deal. I'll call Lane."

"I'll call Dani."

"Check back in 15."

Twenty minutes later, Brad complained to Allison, "I think he's punking us! Why isn't Adam answering his phone?" 

 

"I know what you're gonna say!" Kris exclaimed the minute Adam's head poked through the door of the tiny backroom with the tinier bathroom.

Coming into the room, Adam closed and locked the door behind him. "I doubt it--" 

"You're gonna tell me that I'm being too sensitive and too prideful --"

"I'm going to tell you that you're overdressed for the occasion. Take off your jeans."

"Huh? Wha--" Kris spluttered, then stared incredulously as Adam rolled his eyes and reached for him at the same time. Happily throwing his arms around Adam's neck, Kris tilted his head back, eagerly seeking Adam's kiss, when a lock of the wig brushed his cheek and he froze. 

"Nope!" Kris shook his head and pushed Adam away. "I can't kiss Dusty." 

"Seriously? You're really not going to kiss me when I have this disguise on?" Adam asked, grinning.

Kris shook his head even as he kissed the base of Adam's neck and took a deep breath. At least he still smelled like Adam. Which was awesome. "It freaks me out, man. I'm not a cheater and it feels like I'm a cheater, even though I know I'm not a cheater." 

"Well, it's true that cheetahs never prosper."

"DId you just quote Lion King at me?" Kris laughed and wiggled closer into the warmth of Adam's embrace, feeling his muscles relax as Adam took his weight. "How do you know that?"

"I've babysat Monte's kids and they love that movie." 

"Let me guess. You and the kids act out the parts." Sighing as Adam's hands caressed him in long firm strokes up and down his back, Kris rubbed his cheek against Adam's shoulder. Mmm, he could stay like this all night.

"You immediately recognized the quote, I noticed. So let me guess. You know I'd act it out because you'd do the same thing?" While hiding under Pride Rock, Adam thought, but decided to filter out his comments, for once.

"Hell, yeah." Kris grinned. "I did that -- remember? The pre-school I worked at? I miss..."

Seeing the wistfulness in Kris' eyes, Adam reminded him, "The Cherrys told you that they would love to have you babysit. Plus...You could volunteer, you know."

"I don't have any references. I mean, it's hardly going to go over well that my main reference is a bartender and before that I was--" Kris bit his words off, then added truculently, "A janitor." 

Adam waited and when Kris stared with clenched jaw straight ahead, he offered, "But hey, we know your background checks come out perfectly, don't we? Right down to your high school orchestra teacher -- hey, by the way, you never mentioned you played the viola."

Kris chuckled. "I'm such a man of mystery." 

"The biggest mystery is why you think plaid is a valid fashion option. But anyway, I could ask around for volunteer opportunities for you with Donors Choose or something. No pressure. Just ask."

"I..." Kris froze as he registered his surroundings. If he had not swallowed his pride and come into this room or this new life, who knows where he might be right now, what he might have done... He looked up into Adam's patient gaze. If he hadn't walked into Starbucks that day and accepted those thirty-eight cents... Lesson learned. Sometimes pride cost more than life -- or happiness -- could afford. "I'll think about it. I really will. I promise."

"Great." Adam smiled broadly, knowing what a concession it was for Kris to agree. Time to change the subject. "You're on break. Fifteen minutes less the time you spent blathering on about a kid's movie. So let's get down to business," Adam said briskly as his hands made quick work of Kris' zipper and began pushing his jeans down.

"I don't -- "

"You don't have to do anything, but push off your sneakers."

"You want me half-naked?"

"I want you completely naked, but I'll take what I can get. Move it, boy. Time's a'wastin'. So forget about the sneakers and just drop trou."

"Time's _a'wastin'_....? Drop trou?" Kris laughed. "Oh no, it's Dusty and... " He began to laugh again. Adam Fucking Lambert was the biggest goofball he'd ever met. 

"You're way too tense tonight, Hedgehog and I know a damn fine way to de-stress you." Adam pushed Kris up against the stacked washing machine and dryer combo. "I'm going to wash, dry, and fold you..." He placed one hand on Kris' flat stomach and held him in place while starting to bend his knees. 

"I can't... You can't." Kris gasped, pushing Adam back. "Take off that damn hat and wig. I feel like I'm cheating on you with your trailer park cousin or something. It's freakin'me out." 

"Just close your eyes. I can't take off my wig."

"Why?"

"My hair is a mess under here. It's all flattened down."

"Oh for godssakes." Kris slapped his hand on Adam's chest while cracking up at the innocent look Adam was wearing. Really, Adam being silly was the best way to de-stress. Then again, sex worked too. 

"Hey, it's your choice. I could give you a blow job and we all know you're a slut for my blow jobs..." Adam pulled Kris' hand up and sucked his middle finger into his mouth.

Kris moaned in agreement. "Oh fuck, you're making it hard...."

"Apparently..." Adam agreed, releasing Kris' finger to curve his own hand around the growing bulge in Kris' jeans. "Or you could turn around and I could just fuck you from behind because I see a step stool over there..." 

"Where?" Kris asked eagerly. "I'll get it--" 

_Beep_

"What's that?" Kris mumbled, stumbling when Adam released him.

"I set the timer on my phone. Too bad for you, Mr. Pickypants. Time's up. Back to work." Adam pulled Kris toward the door, slapping his ass. "You go back to work and think about the blow job I could have given you."

"You...." 

"I'll sit there at the bar ogling your ass. While thinking of what I might be doing to it." When Kris looked over his shoulder, Adam added, "With some visual aids." He opened his mouth and slowly circled his lips with his tongue. "Yeah. Just. Like. That."

"You are not..." Kris shook his head. Of course, Adam would do it. 

"I so am. I won't even say a word. I'll just eye fuck you all night."

"This is gonna be a long night."

"You're the size queen. I thought you liked it long and hard." Adam reached out and snagged Kris back against him by encircling him with his arm. He bucked up against Kris' body, rubbing his groin against Kris and biting his own groan when Kris wiggled back. "C'mon, look at what you're missing." 

"I'm afraid to look..." Kris moaned. "Because if I do, I'm gonna end up blowing you in the bathroom." 

 

"Just watch him!" Jacob urged Lane. "I was there last night and it was a hoot."   
_  
"Adam!" The pap yelled. "C'mon, look over here!"_

_"So, Adam, been dating anyone?" The photographer asked as the pack engulfed Adam and the group surrounding him._

_"Why would I be dating anyone when I have all of these lovelies to run around with?" Adam asked with a grin, gesturing at Sutan and his other friends in drag._

_"Since when do you go for_ ladies _?" a smirking pap asked._

_"Since when did going for the guys work out so well for me?" Adam retorted. "I've said I'm bi-curious. Maybe I'm working my way over to actual women by starting with these lovely ladies first."_

 

"I'm debating..." Adam drummed his fingers on the dashboard of Kris' truck while Kris waited for instructions on where to drive now that his shift was over. 

"I'm getting older by the second. And hornier." Kris winked and leaned against Adam to turn his face into Adam's neck and slowly lick the exposed skin. Dusty was gone now and his Adam was back and... He slowly licked up the length of Adam's neck and nuzzled into him. They could make out in the truck while Adam decided. He nipped his way along Adam's jaw, then brushed his lips against Adam's mouth, moaning when Adam immediately parted his lips and took over the kiss. "Mmm. You always smell so good. Clearly the work of the devil. Let's go _somewhere_ so you can show me your pitchfork." 

His laughter filling the cab of the truck, Adam pulled back to pinch Kris' bottom lip. "Well, here's the debate. We can go to your place and deflate the mattress again--"

"You make that sound dirty. But it's not. Sadly." Kris licked the tip of Adam's thumb.

"I was planning on playing a game to see what we'd have to do to make that mattress spring another leak." Adam ran his fingers up Kris' thigh. 

"Oh!" Kris grinned. He reached out and fluffed up Adam's hair, enjoying the feel of the silky strands against his fingertips. He really loved Adam's hair. Especially when Adam was blowing him and he ran his hands through his hair at the same time. "I could get all over that."

Adam kissed Kris' head. "You get all over me when you sleep."

"I do?" Kris looked at Adam in surprise, his hand stopping its movement.

"You cling in your sleep. It's cute." It was also a major reason why Adam had known Kris was for real. No one could fake it when they were asleep.

Kris poked Adam in the shoulder. "I'm too old to be cute."

"Surrrre you are." Adam patted Kris on the head just to ensure that the maximum amount of steam would escape out of Kris' ears. When Kris opened his mouth to argue, Adam hurried on, " _So_ as I was saying, I'm debating between the fun we could have deflating your mattress once or even twice and maybe a third time in the morning--"

"Wow, aren't you ambitious!" 

"Focus will lead you to accomplish greatness."

"You should totally tweet that. And can I say that I love how you define greatness?"

"And you don't define greatness as coming three times in eight hours?" Adam raised an eyebrow. 

"Oh. Yeah. You win." Kris grinned back at Adam. 

"You could just say I was right."

"That would swell your head and I'm not interested in that until it's swelling in my mouth before I suck the rest of your cock down."

"Okaaaay. So your place _is_ closer...." Adam leered while moving his right hand over Kris' hip and abdomen, before reaching his chest and plucking at his nipple just as his left hand cupped Kris' crotch. With any luck, this memory would start to overwrite Kris' past in this alley.

Kris groaned, then smiled. This alley had never been this much fun. New memories to replace the old ones. "But what was the debate?"

"Go to your place or to mine where... two of my friends are wanting to waylay us. And maybe you've had enough of meeting my friends." 

"Who?" Kris wondered. He'd met so many of Adam's friends... Adam was such a social butterfly, Kris thought he knew more people in LA now than he'd known after his entire life in Conway.

"Brad and Allison."

"Your ex and Allison Iraheta?" Kris nodded and reached for the ignition to turn the truck on. "Oh, we're going to your house. I wanna meet her!"

"But we could go to your place--"

"We can have sex later--"

Adam gasped and fell back against the seat, his hand splayed against his chest. "Later? _Later?_ Ohmigod, I've lost my touch."

 

"He's amazing at deflecting!" Jacob crowed, laughing loudly as he and Lane again watched the footage on TMZ. "Damn, he's good."

Lane shook her head. "So the next round of questions are going to be about his supposed bi-curiosity and drag queens and what type of actual women he might be attracted to." 

"Exactly. The scandal! Tranvestites and the American Idol winner? It's delicious. Perez will be all over this. Heh. Thereby completely misdirecting the paps away from the scent of an actual boyfriend even if Adam is seen around with a short cute Southern boy." Jacob grinned and patted Lane on the back. "This is why I love working with Adam. He's so damn good at the game."

"No, you love working with Adam because it gives you material for your fantasy life." Lane smirked.

"Couldn't you have stayed in Alabama longer?" Jacob asked impatiently. 

"Arkansas. Get it right. Since I have a strong suspicion that Adam's current pr plan aside, sooner rather than later you'll be handling questions about a certain boy from that state." 

"You do?" Jacob looked up from his phone, then showed Lane the text from the Tonight Show requesting an interview in addition to a performance. "You honestly think this Allen dude is going to pan out?"

"Absolutely. You're going to lose that bet you made with Geoffrey." Lane grinned as she pulled out her own planner. "Kris is exactly who he said he is."

 

"So. Who. Is. This?" Brad asked, looking Kris up and down as best he could considering how the guy was nearly wound around Adam's side. Judging by the dazed look in his eyes and the redness of his lips, Adam had spent the time prior to his and Allison's arrival kissing the boy senseless. And judging by the open happiness in Adam's eyes, Adam thought the guy holding onto him was a keeper. 

"This is Kris Allen. He's my boyfriend." Adam squeezed Kris and smiled down at him. "Like I told you on the phone, we met at Starbucks." 

Brad nodded. Although Adam had explained that he'd preferred to keep the relationship quiet until it was on firm footing, it was _Adam_. But he and Allison thought it was just about the fun of fooling them. Either way, how the hell had he kept _this_ under wraps? He glanced over at his ex-boyfriend. "For a guy with no filter, you kept your mouth shut."

Slapping Kris' ass with his hand, Adam smiled. "My mouth was otherwise occupied." 

Kris and Allison both burst out laughing. Brad heaved a deep sigh.

Adam gestured for Allison and Brad to fully enter the house. Shutting the door behind them, he introduced, “This is Bradley Bell and--"

"I'm sure you're charmed," Brad snapped, looking Kris up and down again as they walked toward the living room. "I await the same in regards to you."

"Well. You're... special," Kris said softly. Brad was just a more obvious version of Adam's other wary friends, wary due to actions of others. Unfair, maybe, natural, definitely. The ripples in the pond from the stone thrown by one person's actions could overlap many others. Maybe... Adam and Lane were right. Maybe at least some of his friends did miss him. Maybe he should watch some of those videos. 

"He likes to think he is. A very special snowflake who will melt in the sun or when friction is applied." Adam grinned and squeezed Kris' shoulder and nodded toward Allison. "This is Allison--”

“Iraheta.” Kris smiled and grasped her hand, forgetting his anxiety about being introduced to more of Adam’s extended family in the excitement of meeting a vocalist he admired. “I saw you open for Adam on the Glamnation Tour -- you were awesome and I _loved_ you on the show. It was a total rip off that that Gokey dude lasted longer than you did. Total rip off.”

“I like you already.” Allison smiled widely. And she did. The guy's eyes were clear and honest. He was warm and friendly and genuine. She could already tell. And if he wasn't, she'd punch him in the nose. Until he bled. 

“You changed your hair. It's not bright red any more.” Kris nodded toward her as they sat down in the living room. He looked over at Adam's lap and decided that he wouldn't crawl onto it yet. He really should wait until he'd known these friends like five minutes before doing that. It would only be polite. 

 “Well, according to Adam, you never want to stick with the same hairstyle too long or it dates you to a specific time and image and you always want to keep moving.” Allison leaned forward and said in a stage whisper. “I think that’s actually hair according to Madonna, but--” 

“But as long as he’s not taking hair advice from Britney....” Kris rolled his eyes and leaned back against Adam, wiggling deeper into Adam's embrace when Adam slid his arm around his waist and pulled him closer.

“Too true. That shaved look on Adam would be--” 

“A crime,” Kris finished.

"Speaking of hair crimes..." Brad reached out and ruffled Adam's matted-down hair. "Were you wearing that hideous wig again tonight?"

"It worked!" Adam protested. Allison and Kris had hit it right off, which was fantastic. Brad was more cautious. "I went to the bar where Kris works and no one recognized me."

"Until the Leno piece," Kris pointed out.

"Like you were doing so well, telling the other bartender how Leno was a nice guy."

"Well, he was!"  
 __

_"Can we turn the cameras off now?" Adam asked. "My friend here is shy and I'd like to keep him out of the tabloids."_

_"Sure, no problem." Jay handed his microphone off and then peered around Adam. "You actually have a shy friend?" he asked incredulously. Shy had to be a euphemism for 'Adam doesn't want this relationship made public yet.' The young man looked normal enough which... Hmm. "Adam, I've been at parties and events with you and your friends, and none of them is shy. Usually they're bemoaning the fact that their glitter isn't glittery enough."_

_"I like diversity, Jay. It's good to --"_

_"Have someone who's not trying to steal your limelight?"_

_"Ouch." Adam laughed. "I can tell you've spent your career interviewing Hollywood types."_

_"Adam's not like that," Kris interjected, moving forward in his need to defend Adam._

_"Well, yeah, because who notices anyone else when Adam's in the room?" Jay asked. The guy was protective and Adam had been protective of him in turn. That was interesting._

_"I don't." Kris admitted, looking up at Adam. Even in his ridiculous costume, he still commanded attention. Then again, that glambulge was an eye-catcher. Oh wait. The damn loose jeans._

_Adam cleared his throat. If Kris kept staring at his crotch, these loose jeans would get tight. "This is my friend, Kris Allen. Kris, this is Jay Leno. By the way, his mechanic is the one who fixed your car three months ago."_

_"Oh, thank you! So much." Kris gripped Jay's hand and shook it. "I can't thank you enough. The truck runs better now than it_ ever _did."_

_"Ah, this is the guy with the vintage jalopy. My mechanic enjoyed the challenge."_

_"Vintage?" Kris smiled crookedly. "That's a nice way of putting it."_

_"Hey, one reason I got into cars was because I drove pieces of shit and couldn't afford to pay anyone to fix them." Jay smiled again. "That's why when I got money, I_ may _have overcompensated by buying a few nice cars."_

_Kris nodded. "If I ever get some money, I'll probably blow it on guitars. Although mebbe not -- how many does a person need?"_

_"You sound like my wife about my cars. You play the guitar?"_

_"I play. And sing," Kris confirmed._

_"You're a musician? Adam, when you come to the studio tomorrow, make sure you spend time with Rickey Minor, who's been talking about seeing you again, anyway. You could introduce Kris. Maybe Rickey knows of some work."_

_Adam's eyes flashed with annoyance and Jay winced. Damn. He had forgotten that one boyfriend of Adam's who had been using him to get access to career contacts._

_"No," Kris said firmly. "I don't want to use Adam to further my career."_

_"It is often about who you know in this town," Jay said. "Honestly."_

_Kris nodded. Looking at Adam, he agreed, "So I've discovered. But a man has to have some principles and I'm not gonna whore myself out for a_ contact _."_

_"Whoa. Harsh." Jay glanced at Adam, who was looking at Kris._

_Adam looked at Kris. Maybe... Different situations called for different responses. Maybe it was time for a change._

 

Allison fingered her hair, dark brown with just a few tips of color. "Well, I sure wasn't pulling a Britney and shaving it! I decided to go for a more natural look. Plus, when I moved in with him, he was about as excited as my mom was about the hair dye bleeding all over the tub.”

“I didn’t know you lived with him,” Kris interjected. 

“Yeah, after I was old enough to live on my own.

Adam shrugged. “It was good for both of us.” 

Brad nodded. Adam was best when not living alone.

Kris nodded. “I can see that. Adam is probably happier when he’s living with people and you got to spread your wings but you had a safe nest and--” He halted when he saw the arrested look on Brad's face turn into approval. Huh. Guess he'd said something right. 

“And Big Bird for a brother. Always hovering.” Allison elbowed Adam.

“I have never worn yellow feathers in my life.” Adam sniffed, then grimaced. “God, I would look like Big Bird in yellow feathers.” 

“You notice he doesn’t deny the hovering.” Allison grinned, then leaned forward and in a stage whisper said, “I didn’t get lucky once with him around.”

Kris chuckled. 

“But I did get an education on --” 

“Allison.” Adam shook his head. 

“On hair products. What did you think I was gonna say, _hermano_?” 

“The mind reels.” Brad shuddered, then smiled brightly at Adam. “So. You two.” 

“Here we go....” Adam warned _sotto voce_ to Kris. He stared Brad down as he told him, "Yes, he's my boyfriend."

"So tell us more. You met in Starbucks and it was caffeinated magic?" Brad smiled. 

"Well, he was trailing glitter," Kris quipped with an answering smile as he touched Adam's cheek. "Who could resist that?"

Brad leaned back. Either Allen was the best damn actor ever or he adored Adam. He'd bet on the latter. Time to relax. "Hey, I'm hungry and thirsty. Pretend your mother raised you right, Lambert and feed and water us." 

“Would anyone like a drink?” Kris asked, standing up and moving to the bar in the corner and automatically beginning to mix a martini for Adam..

“He’s a bartender. He knows how to make a drink. If you're nice to him.” Adam nodded at Kris, then as he stood up, stared at his friends. In a low tone, he told them, "I'll go get snacks, but you need to play nice with him. I know you both worry about me, but Kris is a good guy. Normal, decent, sweet and funny as hell. Lane checked him out. It's all good."

"Sure," Brad and Allison said in unison, then looked at each other and nodded. 

"I mean it." Adam stared at Brad. 

"I do too. He seems like a good guy," Brad agreed. "Even if you did punk the both of us." 

"Will you all stop staring at me?" Kris complained. 

"You're worth looking at." Adam winked.

"Even without glitter." Brad winked too. 

"I brought along edible body glitter!" Allison exclaimed. "Like I promised."

"Now I know why you wanted to come home--" Kris teased, smiling as Adam turned to face him with a smile of his own.

"Me? I wasn't the one who wanted to come home, I was totally up for going to your place and deflating that mattress a few times." Adam strode forward to the bar and leaned against it, taking Kris' hand in his and squeezing, before lifting it to his lips and kissing the palm.

"Where do you live?" Brad asked, tossing aside his own anxiety over Adam getting hurt again as he saw the soft and yes, sweet look on Kris' face as he stared at Adam, then curled his hand over the kiss Adam had placed in his palm. Sweet, indeed. OMG, he was going to get a cavity. 

When Kris told him the street, Brad winced and Allison gave a low whistle. Not a good neighborhood.

"I know, not a good neighborhood. And my apartment is... drecky."

"It wouldn't be so bad if it had a new coat of paint and some new flooring," Adam told him. "And you got rid of that _chair_."

Kris rolled his eyes. "Drop the chair."

"I'd like to. Right out the window." Adam pantomimed opening a window, shoving something threw it, then made his hand zoom down to the bar top and made jazz hands. "You're on the third floor, so that fall should smash it to smithereens. Phsssst!" Adam made an explosive sound.

Kris shook his head and hid his grin, hoping to incite Adam to carry on some more. " _Smithereens?_ Are we in a Bugs Bunny cartoon?"

"Hey, there's an idea for Halloween--" Adam broke off as his phone rang. Seeing it was Jacob, he said, "Work, have to take it," and excused himself. 

Allison jumped forward and began chattering about Adam's Halloween party while Kris mixed two drinks for them. When Brad began regaling them with tales of costumes past, Kris waited for him to take a breath and then noted, "I hear you want to dress up with Adam as David and Goliath for Halloween."

"Yeah. It would be awesome, but I'm concerned because there's nothing glamorous about it." 

"I'm concerned that having Adam portray a hulking monster -- and one who's defeated -- isn't the best thing for a guy with body image problems. Or one who's had two little twinks try to defeat him."

Brad opened his mouth, then shut it as Kris stared him down. Why hadn't he thought of that? Damn it. He nodded slowly, agreeing with Kris. 

Allison avoided looking at Brad, embarrassed that neither of them had thought of that. She nodded at Kris. "Totally excellent point, Kris. Do _you_ like Halloween?"

Smiling in relief that Brad hadn't snapped his head off for that comment, although his eyes were sharp and thoughtful, Kris smiled at Allison. "I do. I don't really like being the center of attention, but on Halloween, everyone is dressed up and silly, so it's okay." 

"You don't like being the center of attention?" Allison wrinkled her nose in confusion. That would be a unique characteristic for someone in Adam's circle. But then again, maybe that was a good yin and yang. 

"Not really. I mean, I like performing my music, but... it's kinda like I enjoy more the performing than the attention. Do you know what I mean?"

"I get it," Allison agreed.

"I don't. I probably need more alcohol." Brad shrugged. "But does it bother you that Adam likes being the center of attention?"

"'Course not." Kris shrugged back. "That's part of who he is. If I didn't like that, why would I be with him?" 

"Good point," Brad agreed. "A lot of people think they can change someone else."

"I may not be really experienced in relationships, but I've already seen just from my own family that thinking you can change someone or that they'll somehow change to suit you is just stupid. No offense." 

"Absolutely." Brad leaned on the bar. This Kris did seem like a good guy. Snarky, smart, soft-spoken and easy-going with with an inner core of strength. Interesting combo with Adam. "So which look of Adam's is your favorite?"

"My favorite look? You mean my favorite of the way he dresses or the favorite look in his eyes? Because I'm not gonna tell you about the way he looks at me, that's awfully personal," Kris said firmly. Actually his favorite look of Adam's was the look on his face after they kissed and his eyes opened. Then again, there was the look he wore when he was advancing on Kris with only one goal in mind or then again... Whether his eyes were alight with lust or what Kris hoped was love, he felt... like the one and only. 

Brad squeezed Allison's hand. A guy who guarded private moments was a good balance for Adam and the soft look on Kris' face as he glanced out the door to where Adam was pacing on the back patio told him everything he needed to know. This Kris was in love with Adam. "Your favorite look on him -- clothes, hair, make up."

 

"It's been picked up by that many? Great." Adam nodded. He needed more time to think about how to protect Kris from the paps and the tabloids and Perez as much as possible. 

"Yeah, your little excursion with Sutan and his friends paid off big time. I've already fielded calls about interviews with the night-time talk shows, Ellen, and Ryan Seacreast."

"I'm going on Leno tomorrow night. Does he want to talk or..."

"Leno's always been one of your biggest supporters. It wouldn't hurt to give him first crack. Even though he met Kris, he'll play along as long as you give him a first exclusive interview later on. But don't give away too much.... Ah, what am I saying, I don't need to tell you how to do an interview."

 

"What look do I prefer?" Kris tapped his chin. Good lord, he felt like he was being interviewed for a job. Well, he was used to that, by now. "Hmm, you mean other than naked?"

Allison giggled. Brad rolled his eyes. 

"Actuallllllly...." Kris drawled as slowly as possible.

Allison looked from Kris to Brad and back again, making a silent note to work hard at getting those two together as often as possible. Because this was fun. 

"Actually what?" Brad snapped. "C'mon, southern boy, I'm dying here." 

Kris grinned. Brad was going to be easy to bug. "If I had to choose out of his many looks and say something fit for public consumption, I'd probably choose when he's all glammed up for a concert." 

"Really?" Allison asked in surprise. "You're wearing jeans, a tee-shirt and sneakers and you like it best when he's all glammed up?"

"It's hot on him. It's not me. Allison -- I bet you're not looking for a guy who dresses like you, right?"

"Nope. That's a good point, actually." Allison nodded as Kris took a long drink. "Just because you're in a same-sex relationship doesn't mean you would want everything to be the same or else you might as well just jerk off while looking in the mirror." 

Kris choked on his drink. 

Allison grinned and slapped him on the back. Kris looked shocked. That was so cute. 

"And that's a bad thing?" Brad asked, blinking his eyes innocently. 

"Only if you consider pathetic a bad thing," Kris retorted, blinking his eyes innocently. He grinned as Brad shot him a dirty look, then reluctantly nodded. "But enough about you, let's talk about someone interesting. Adam. That look is hot as hell on him. And..." Kris thought. "Not just the sparkly clothes and jewelry and glitter. It's the look in his eyes, the aura of... anticipation he gives off. The man was meant to perform and seeing him doing what he was born to do... Well..." Kris shrugged. "I'm probably not explaining this right, but that's the best look of all." 

"Fulfilled, right?" Brad nodded, then looked toward the patio, watching Adam continue to pace back and forth as he talked on the phone. "For the record, Adam was born to do more than perform, he'll be fulfilled with at least two other things than performing." 

"I'm sure." Kris nodded and looked toward the patio where Adam was on the phone. Again. That man worked too hard. He walked toward the patio doors, tapped on the window and gestured for Adam to come inside. "He also looks damn fulfilled after sex." 

 

"So that's it for tomorrow..." Lane nodded as she put her planner away. "I texted Adam to ask if Kris was going to attend Leno with his mom. If not, then I'll be the plus one in the audience."

"So you're absolutely satisfied that Allen is the real deal?" Jacob asked, relaxing into the couch cushions in his office. Long night.

"Absolutely, positively." Gesturing at the computer monitor, where the clip of Adam with the drag queens was now playing on another site, Lane smiled. "Adam is the actor who was been hiding behind a mask." 

"Yeah, I know. That's one reason I've been pushing him to reconsider the direction of his cd. All that sad or angry music isn't him -- and when he finally snaps out of it, he's not going to want to sell the music he made while in a funk any more. Which would be a huge promo problem."

 

"So your apartment needs some refreshing?" Brad asked. "We should have a painting party. Many hands and all that."

"Totally!" Allison nodded eagerly, the multi-colored tips of her hair bouncing around her shoulders. "What color?"

"I...uh... Thanks. That would be great. I like blue..." Kris said slowly, looking in confusion at Brad, understanding that the offer to paint his apartment was also an offer of friendship. "And red and green."

"Primary colors." Brad nodded. Yup. Made sense. Kris was a straight-shooter.

Kris reached out and touched Allison's hair. "Although I do love the teal and magenta and purple in your hair and the purple in Adam's. Did you two get it done together?"

"Oooh, purple! Almost forgot!" Allison bounced over to her oversized purse and pulled out a small zipper bag. "I have edible glitter body paint for Adam!"

"Ha! That's for me, if you please?" Kris held out his hand.

Slapping the bag into Kris' hand, Allison giggled. "Use it in good health."

"Use what?" Adam asked as he closed the door behind him. "Please tell me, Allison Iraheta, that you did not just hand out a sex toy. Don't make me call your mama."

Planting her hands on her hips, Allison complained, "Sheesh! You suck all the fun out --"

"That's not my experience with his sucking," Kris said drily. 

Allison clamped a hand over her mouth as giggles exploded from it while Adam and Brad both burst out laughing. Adam smiled in relief that Kris felt comfortable enough with his friends to crack sex jokes. Kris opened the bag and smiled. He had ideas.

"Adam, don't we have a mattress to deflate or something?" Kris asked, holding out a tube of purple glitter and licking his lower lip. Oh, he knew just where he wanted to put this stuff.

"Absofreakinglutely!" Adam agreed seeing the look in Kris' eyes. Putting his hand on Allison and Brad's backs, he steered them toward the door. "You met and interviewed the boyfriend, time to go."

"But, but..." Brad teased. "You didn't even feed us--"

"He's only got so much in his uh cupboard and it belongs to meeeeee!" Kris sing-songed as waved goodbye and headed towards the stairs. 

Allison giggled. "I like him, Adam..." she whispered. 

"Me too," Adam whispered back. "How about you, Brad?"

"Consider me duly charmed. He's a keeper." 

"Good. I think you two might have some stuff in common--"

"Oh, like--" Brad dropped his gaze to the front of Adam's jeans.

"Eyes up!" Kris yelled. "I saw that!" 

"Well, it's there, ya know? Like the Washington Monument." Brad shrugged and looked up at Adam, who was actually blushing with pleasure at Kris' possessiveness. Interesting. "What do we have in common?"

"You both got out of Dodge for similar reasons," Adam said in a low tone. "It might help Kris to talk to someone who's been there done that, although leaving wasn't so much his choice."

"Ahhhh." Brad nodded. "Sure. Us southern boys should stick together and I don't mean --"

"Buh-bye!" Adam called out as he opened the door and shoved Brad and Allison through.

"But seriously, I'm hungry!" Brad wailed. "Interrogating your new boyfriend is hard work."

"Here!" Adam reached into his jeans pocket and through a ten dollar bill at Brad. "Go to Taco Bell and knock yourself into a bean-inspired coma and don't call me for about twelve hours." 

**Bang**

Adam slammed the door and turned around. "Now, where were we?" 

"Twelve hours?" Kris asked, right before he began running up the stairs two at a time.

"Well, I promised to deflate your bed at least three times, but that was before the arrival of edible glitter body paint. I have so many ideas for that..." Adam called out as he advanced up the stairs and down the hall toward his bedroom, keeping careful pace so that he was behind Kris to enjoy the view. "Like that ass in front of me--"

"Allison gave me the paint, not you!" Kris retorted, waving it around as Adam paused in the doorway. 

"So, the glitter is for you to use?" Adam asked as he advanced on Kris. "Well, as a good host, I should give you what you need. So where do you want it?"

"Where do I want it?" Kris deepened his accent and ordered, "Move it, boy. Time's a'wastin'. Drop trou."


	19. This glitter is not meant for internal use.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 19: This glitter is not meant for internal use  
Rating: NC-17**

 

"Can I really put it on you?" Kris asked eagerly, nearly bouncing in his excitement on the bed as Adam quickly pulled off his shirt and tossed it aside.

Eyeing the tube of glitter as well as the small zippered bag, Adam paused in undressing and asked dubiously, "You really want to?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want to. D'uh." Kris waved the tube impatiently. 

"Occam's Razor." Adam nodded, unzipping his jeans and shoving them down.

"Who's Occam?" Kris asked, growing distracted as Adam's body was revealed to him. He couldn't wait to taste glitter on that cock. "And what does his razor have to do with glitter? Or with us having sex, because involving a razor is waaaaay too kinky for me especially if it belongs to some guy named Occam -- is he an ex too -- although did you want me to shave my balls because I will and --" 

"No, no!" Adam laughed, falling onto the bed holding his stomach. "It's a phrase, basically meaning sometimes the simplest explanation is the truth." 

Kris nodded as he rolled on top of a still-laughing Adam and stroked his hands over Adam's bare chest and broad shoulders. "Mmm, you''re naked. Well, then, we'll be using his razor a lot because I'm a simple guy. Not complex like you." 

Adam raised an eyebrow. "Simple? The fact that you wear plain white tees and plaid shirts and Converse sneakers but love glitter on me? Kinda negates the simple label. Along with--Mmm." Adam stopped talking when Kris bent forward and kissed him on the lips. Sliding his hand up behind Kris' head, he held him in place while their mouths slowly explored each other. 

Breaking apart for air, Kris sighed as he saw the soft but needy look in Adam's eyes. "Did anyone ever tell you that you talk too much, Lambert?"

"Me?" Adam laughed again and reached for Kris' shirt, pulling it off in one quick movement, then unbuttoning the top button of his jeans before pulling down his zipper. "You're the one who needs a gag--"

"Also too kinky for me." Kris groaned as Adam slid his right hand up Kris' torso and played with a quickly hardening nipple and pushed his left hand into Kris' jeans and began stroking his cock. Where was that glitter? He looked around the bed, spying the tube in the top quilt and reached for it, stopping in mid-motion when Adam's fingers made a particularly happy move.

"Well, then we have a problem. I think you're talkative and you think I'm talkative. How ever will we solve this problem?" Adam grinned before rolling Kris over. Bending over him, he tugged his jeans off and threw them over the side of the bed and snatched the tube of glitter away before Kris could reach it. 

"Hey--" Kris began to protest and started to sit up then trailed off when he saw the predatory gleam in Adam's eyes. That look meant good times were ahead. He smiled when Adam shoved him back down and sucked in a breath of anticipation as Adam spread his legs apart. Oh yeah, good times were ahead. 

Adam uncapped the tube and squeezed a small amount onto his fingertips. "Hmm. Where should I start?" Slowly looking from Kris' eyes down over his body and up again, watching Kris' cock harden under his gaze, Adam rubbed his fingers together and then put a splotch of color on each of Kris' ear lobes. Nodding to himself while Kris rolled his eyes, Adam bent forward and licked the curve of Kris' ear, gently tickling the lobe before sucking it into his mouth. 

When Kris shivered, Adam bit down softly, then licked the lobe clean. Gently moving Kris' head to the side, he repeated it on the other ear. When Kris arched his neck, Adam licked his way down, then laved his tongue along Kris' collarbone to his shoulder, before taking a quick bite. Squeezing more glitter out, he spread it along Kris' collarbones, then over the upper curve of his pectoral muscles and took a long look at the beginning of his work. "Yeah.. this works." 

Looking down at himself, Kris shook his head. "I don't know how you ended up with the glitter -- I should be putting it on you. I'm not a glam kinda guy, I must look ridiculous." 

"No, you look gorgeous, as always..." Adam smiled, then his head snapped up. "I know. I have--"

"An idea. I always love your ideas." Kris threw his head back and laughed from sheer happiness. What had his life become? He could never have imagined any of this.

"The mirror." Encircling Kris' wrist with his hand, Adam pulled him up from the bed and tugged him into the large walk-in closet with a huge mirror along one wall. Flipping on the light, he told Kris, "I'll show you."

""Oh shit..." Kris groaned as he stopped and saw their reflection in the mirror. He had real Adam and now mirror Adam and now mirror Adam's hands were touching him and real Adam's hands were so warm and... He was going to go on overload from so much sensation. He gasped when Adam's fingers began spreading the glitter and the cool and gritty texture of it teased and tormented his nipples into aching hardness. 

Simultaneously arching into Adam's touch and pushing back against the length of Adam's body behind him, he wiggled his butt into Adam's legs, needing to feel that solid strength behind him as once again he felt the desire rise and heat so quickly. 

The tube of glitter clenched between his teeth, Adam reached up for it and squeezed out more, lightly streaking the purple sheen along Kris' flat abdomen, feeling the muscles there clench against his touch, then Kris hiss in a loud breath as his fingers grazed the tip of his cock. 

"Don't stop..." Kris begged as Adam's fingers withdrew, then shifted impatiently until Adam returned with more glitter. Kris held his breath as he watched Adam's hand, then looked up to watch in the mirror as Adam coated the shaft with light touches. When Adam's hand moved to his hip, Kris circled his forearm. "Seriously, don't stop--" 

"It's edible, remember?" Adam grinned, bending his head and slowly licking a path along Kris' collarbone, following the trail of glitter down over his chest, before sucking a hard nipple into his mouth, then quickly licking the other one clean before biting it. "Mmm... sweet," he whispered, as he began to kneel. He wanted to taste all of Kris. 

"No, wait..." Kris grabbed the tube of glitter out of Adam's left hand. "You're the one...I wanna see you..." Brushing his fingertip along Adam's lower lip, Kris stared up at Adam, the light purple glitter on the full lip teasing him. He bit his own before giving into the urge to nibble on Adam's, gently biting, then sweeping his tongue across the full softness, groaning as Adam's tongue teased his upper lip, finally surrendering and opening his mouth for a full kiss, the sweetness of the glitter melting on their tongues.

"More..." Kris demanded, before Adam took his mouth in a heated rush, make both their heads spin, the glitter's sweetness blending with the passion between them.   
His hands were full of soft skin and warm Kris and Adam knew as Kris welcomed him into his mouth over and over, his heart was now full too. 

And... Adam opened his eyes and looked in the mirror. Ha. Kris' ass had glitter handprints on it. 

When they broke for a breath, Kris stared at Adam, seeing the faint remains of the glitter from his body dotting Adam's, but it wasn't enough. "My turn." 

This mirror was the best idea he'd ever had, Adam decided as he watched Kris from the rear view. If he didn't know how bad of an idea photographs were, he'd have some taken of the two of them, because the sight of their bodies together in the mirror was a sight he'd like to see over and over again. Then again, there was no reason why they couldn't _do_ this over and over again. Damn, life was good again.

Forcing himself to focus on what seemed like the impossible task of making his fingers squeeze from the bottom of the tube, Kris rested his forehead against Adam's chest and then grew distracted, his tongue sneaking out to flick against Adam's nipple, smiling when Adam groaned, squeezed his ass and ordered, "Hurry up."

Nodding in agreement as he felt his cock pushing against Adam's hip, Kris quickly rubbed the glitter onto Adam's nipple and even more quickly fastened his mouth to the hard nub. Sucking hard until he heard Adam groan and his fingers press hard into his ass, Kris lifted his mouth to watch in the mirror as he applied the glitter to Adam's cock, his fingers encircling its hardness, the glitter growing even more slippery as it mixed in with the fluid already leaking out, the liquid and make up shining in the silver mirror. He looked up and realized that shining more intensely was the desire in Adam's eyes, directed at him. 

Unbelievable. Unable to resist, Kris moved forward, running his hands up Adam's shoulders, seeing the sprinkle of glitter left in its wake, twinkling up amongst the freckles. Beautiful. 

"Gorgeous..." Adam whispered, watching in the mirror as Kris' muscles flexed as he stood on tip toe . As Kris began licking his arm, Adam lifted his knee and lightly rubbed against Kris' balls, seeing his entire body tense at the friction. 

"Oh fuck..." Kris moaned and unconsciously reached for his own cock with his free hand.

Adam took the tube and brushed Kris' hand aside. "No. It's mine to play with." He stroked more glitter up and down the shaft, feeling the heat and weight in his hand, the velvet softness over hardness with the slight grittiness of the glitter, the purple sheen of it glinting up at them in the light. 

"The glitter is mine though," Kris asserted, once again taking the tube. Once he had emptied it into his hand, he grinned and looked from Adam's amused eyes down to his hard cock. "Okay, big guy, this should be just about enough..." Sinking to his knees on the carpeted floor, he immediately began spreading the last of the glitter onto Adam's cock and balls, thankful that Adam did shave his balls because it made the glitter application so much easier and -- "Huh. I _am_ your glitter application assistant..." Kris murmured, hearing Adam laugh above him, then choke on a gasp as Kris bent his head and licked his tongue along the outer curve of Adam's balls. 

"Good.. job..." Adam groaned as Kris slowly licked every bit of glitter from his skin, sliding his tongue from the tip of the head, down the shaft and along the balls, then back up. Adam smiled at the sight of Kris' wet lips glistening with glitter as they encased his cock. "Look at yourself."

Turning his head, Kris grinned. "I look like some alien slut. Well, then, I better get back to investigating this life form..." He slid his hands up Adam's thighs and along the crease of his leg until he had circled the base of his cock. He kept his eyes on Adam's face, watching how his eyes darted between the mirror and their bodies as Kris' tongue slowly laved the underside, carefully licking up all traces of the glitter. "Mmm, it is sweet. But give me more..." Opening his mouth wide, Kris groaned, knowing the vibrations made the feeling more intense and knowing what Adam was feeling made his own pleasure spike higher.

Too much... Adam looked down at Kris' lips, shimmering with glitter as they circled his cock, then once again into the mirror and felt his tongue lapping at him, felt the reverberations from his moaning and saw Kris' hard cock rising with every pass of his mouth, deeper and deeper each time. Too much... Adam groaned and gripped Kris' shoulders as the sensations overwhelmed him and he gave into the flood of feeling.

Licking his lips, Kris grinned. "Yeah, damn sweet." He sat back on his heels and began stroking his own cock in short fast strokes. 

"Don't you dare..." Adam ordered, kneeling himself and pushing Kris back onto the carpeting. "Mine, I told you..." He planted his hands on Kris' legs, shoved them apart and bent his head all in one flurry of movement, engulfing Kris' cock in his mouth. Sweet indeed, Adam thought as the taste of the glitter mixed with Kris' own flavor, as Kris' hands delved into his hair, massaging his scalp and his legs wrapped around Adam's shoulders. 

Kris stared in fascination at the sight of Adam's mouth taking him on a wild ride and... oh too short of a ride, he knew, feeling his balls rise up against his body, then as Adam's hands slid under his butt and pulled him up higher, he gave in, wondering how he'd lasted that long. 

 

"That was..." Kris laughed as Adam covered him with his body. He wiggled happily under Adam and nuzzled affectionately into his neck. "Damn. I have no words. Weird and kinda kinky, but safe kinky and my lips and -- " 

"Were there other colors?" Adam asked abruptly.

"Yeah. Blue and green and magenta... I want the blue next!" Kris asserted as Adam hauled him to his feet and pushed him, laughing, toward the bed. "It matches your eyes." 

"You of the plaid shirt that has nothing to do with your tee-shirt or sneakers or anything else is worried about matching edible body glitter to my eyes?" Adam picked up the little bag Allison had given them. 

"Well, it's you," Kris said firmly, snatching the bag away from Adam and poking through it. "Now where's that blue?"

"Aren't you ambitious?" Adam teased.

"Actually... yeah. Can I have some floss?"

Adam cracked up, then ran his tongue around his teeth. "Yeah, I see the point. And should we clean off first so we can start again with a clean canvas?"

"I'll cog. i. tate. and get back to you on that." Kris smiled and this time was the one pulling Adam into the bathroom. 

"Here." Adam pulled open the center drawer of the vanity. "Your own toothpaste, toothbrush and yes, floss." 

"You bought me a toothbrush?" Kris stared at the cellophane-wrapped blue toothbrush. The last time anyone had given him a gift was.... his last birthday before he'd left home. 

"Sure. That way you don't have to worry about bringing yours from the apartment."   
Adam paused as he saw the arrested expression on Kris' face. "What is it? Did I overstep?" Or hell, was that the first gift Kris had gotten in forever? 

"God, no!" Kris smiled. "It's... nice of you to do that. Thanks." 

"Well, good, because I also cleared a drawer for you." Adam pointed toward the closet on the other side of the wall. "And bought you some clothes to put in it. Just a couple of tee-shirts and a pair of jeans and what not. I promise you, nothing extravagant. Basic stuff so you don't have to plan ahead." Basic stuff in the right size so he could better see Kris' hot little body. Not that he had an ulterior motive or anything. Nope. Pure motives. That's right. Call him Adam Pure Motives Lambert. Absofrickinglutely. He filled a glass with water and drank from it, swishing it around his mouth to keep from saying something stupid and unfiltered like knowing Kris could use more than three shirts to his name and wanting to help him out. 

"You did not--" Kris exclaimed in disbelief, then broke off as he stared at Adam's ass as he leaned over the sink to rinse his mouth. That ass was so damn distracting. "Hey!" Kris screeched as Adam suddenly pinched his nipple. "You have a hand of stealth! And by the way--" 

"You know..." Adam continued playing with Kris' nipple. "You could argue with me about it or you could brush and floss your teeth and we could start using that blue glitter." 

"You..." Kris glared at Adam, then laughed and reached for his new toothbrush. "What's the point of pride when sex is at stake?"

"My thoughts exactly!" Adam grinned and pushed the floss in Kris' direction. 

"You do know how to make problems clear, doncha?" Kris asked, grinning at Adam in the bathroom mirror before shoving the toothbrush into his mouth. Adam somehow managed to find ways through or around problems that he could never imagine. His confidence was... invigorating, Kris decided. Everything had seemed so hopeless and lackluster and then Adam bought him a cup of coffee and his life was changing... maybe because he could see the possibilities that were there. Like... Mmm. More sex. 

"And there's always a problem..." Adam agreed, watching Kris' face flush as his nipple got harder and harder. "As in, how long is it going to take you to clean your mouth so we can get dirty again?" 

"Yeah, I'm good..." Kris dropped the toothbrush with a clatter as Adam reached up with his other hand and both nipples were teased. His hand shook as he turned on the faucet, cupped his hand and rinsed his mouth in a hurry, shivering as Adam's hands never stopped teasing him the entire time. "Damn, you're good. Let's try it with the blue." 

Grabbing a bath towel from the stack on the sink, Adam grabbed Kris' wrist and pulled him back into the closet.

"You know, I didn't leave Arkansas to go back into the closet," Kris joked. "Although this closet is nicer than my apartment...." he mused, looking around at the elaborate closet system with its nice wood and all those racks and drawers -- 

"Here--" Adam shoved the little bag at Kris. "Pick your poison." 

"Oh, we could be glitter pirates." Kris grinned. He could be totally silly with Adam and it was cool. Sex could be silly. And fun. Whodathunk that was the lesson he'd learn about sex from Adam Fucking Lambert.

"Dear lord..." Adam smiled as he spread the towel on the carpeted floor. When was the last time sex had been _fun_?

Guess Adam was planning on getting really messy. Kris pulled out the magenta tube, uncapped it and squeezed some on to his fingers. When Adam stood up, Kris moved toward him with a smile and traced a design on his chest. Smiling at his handiwork, he recapped the tube, then unable to resist, leaned forward and began kissing the glitter off, before kissing his way up Adam's neck and hurrying to his mouth, needing to taste the sweetness of his kiss. 

Hugging Kris to him, Adam smiled at the combination of tenderness and lust in Kris' touch and reached for the blue glitter. 

"Blue? Yeah, baby..." Kris nodded as they shared the tube between them. Kris once again stroked glitter onto Adam's cock, grinning when Adam returned the favor. "We match."

"Absolutely critical when it comes to glitter application. Because really, it's so easy to go overboard with glitter and as we all know, my goal is understatement." Adam grinned as he squeezed out more glitter. He was definitely going to buy more of this stuff because Kris was totally into it judging by the predatory look in his eyes. He wasn't sure he'd ever had anyone look at him quite like that before, that combination of need, amusement, affection, and lust. 

Kris smiled back and lightly traced a line down Adam's the center of Adam's chest, then made swirls over his chest, stopping after each line to lick it away, each time teasing Adam's nipples, gasping himself as he felt Adam's hands trace their own path then tightly squeeze his buttocks. "What..."

"Mine." Adam laughed as he looked at his handiwork in the mirror. Kris had fingerprints on his buttocks and a nice directional signal. "We're going geocaching without a GPS." 

"Whaaat?" Kris laughed. "What are you doing back there?" He twisted around and when he couldn't see, looked up in to the mirror. He gasped, then laughed. "You painted a glitter arrow pointed at my... "

"Happy hole."

"Happy hole?" Kris burst out laughing, then laughed some more as Adam too cracked up. 

Watching Adam bend forward as he convulsed with laughter, Kris shook his head. "Are you drunk on one beer and one martini?" 

"No." It wasn't alcohol in his veins that was making him giddy, it was happiness. And eh, he was half way down, might as well keep going, Adam decided and knelt. "Hands and knees." Adam pointed towards the floor. 

"Ooh and I can watch too..." Kris eagerly scrambled onto his hands and knees, making sure to keep his body in profile to the mirror. "Get to it before I... Oh." He blushed and reached for his cock as glitter began to drip.

Smoothing his hands down Kris' back, then slowly curving them over his buttocks, Adam smiled when Kris growled at him. He leaned over Kris' body and slowly began licking his way down Kris' spine, taking his time, feeling the slight quivers in the taut frame below his, then the stiffening of muscles in anticipation as Adam's mouth reached the upper curves of his buttocks. 

Following the path of glitter downward, Adam slowly licked the length of the arrow, using his hands to gently spread Kris' cheeks, hearing Kris' rasping breathing and soft exhortations to hurry as reason to make time stand still. 

Kris watched Adam's face in the mirror, the concentration he gave to everything now focused on giving pleasure and oh fuck, there went his tongue and "OH FUCK!" Kris shrieked. His fists clenched into the towel and he slid his knees further apart. Unable to look away from the sight of Adam tonguing him, Kris watched and felt sweat break out along his back as he saw Adam's right hand with glitter on his fingertips sliding over his buttocks, hip and then around his hip bone before circling his cock, leaving a trail of shining blue along his body. 

The multiple sensations of the sight of Adam pleasuring him along with the damp touch of his hands, slightly rough from the glitter and the rough texture of his wet tongue were taking him, oh no, too fast and "Not yet, not yet!" Kris yelled and swiveled around, immediately launching himself at Adam, straddling his legs. 

Groaning, then throwing his head back in delighted abandon at the feel of Kris' skin all around him, the tightness of his thighs gripping Adam's hips and the wet stroking of his tongue against his neck, Adam gripped Kris' buttocks and pulled him even tighter against him. 

"Aren't you gonna take me?" Kris asked impatiently, shifting his body so that he could rub his balls against Adam's cock.

"We have way too much glitter in use, it's gritty. I wouldn't want to hurt you," Adam warned. "I'm not sure this body glitter is meant for internal use..." 

"Do they make glitter you could use like that? Because, day-um, that would be so hot -- to impale myself on your cock when it's all glittery. Ohhh..." Kris moaned and stared down at Adam's cock, imagining... 

"You are the kinky one!" Adam laughed in surprise. 

Kris blushed. "Only with you. I never had these thoughts before you...You give me the freedom to think in ways, to be...free...." He began rubbing his cock against Adam's abdomen, needing more, then slid lower, to thrust against Adam's cock. "That's how I come up with ideas like riding your glitter cock." He grinned. They were being totally silly and yet this was so sexy...

Adam stroked his hands up and down along Kris' hips, then his inner thighs, musing, "Although I have to admit, the idea of watching your body take my dick, the glitter disappearing inside you... Oh fuck..." He groaned and reached down between them, Kris' hand joining his as they rubbed their cocks together.

"Lube," Adam growled, stretching back to pull open a drawer and scrabble around in it. 

"Adammmmm...." Kris moaned, reaching forward to stroke the long length of Adam's body stretched out before him.

"If you keep doing that.... You're damn distracting..." Adam complained, his fingers finally finding the lube and holding it up triumphantly.

"You look so fucking hot." And mine! Kris ran his hands over as much of Adam's chest, shoulders and arms as he could reach, inadvertently spreading the glitters lightly over his body. He looked like he had at one of the shows, with glitter all over him. Kris gasped. "I have an idea now." 

"What is it?" Adam asked, feeling the tell-tale signs of Kris beginning to lose control in the tightening of his thigh muscles around his hips. Hurrying with the lube, he poured a liberal amount into his hand and tossed the lube onto the towel, immediately reaching for their cocks. 

"Oh!" Kris gritted his teeth even as his body began to take over and thrust into Adam's hand. "I...I know what I want for my birthday..." He stopped to catch his breath.

"A case of this glitter?" And damn, he'd buy it for Kris, Adam decided, given how excited Kris was about the stuff. 

"To start. I want you -- wearing the glitter I put on you -- singing that Bowie song about the guy who fell to earth? Yeah, that one. Singing, naked except for glitter, just for me."

"Oh hell. I'll buy you the damn company," Adam offered. They bent forward, mouths meeting as their bodies moved together once again until they exploded together. 

"I really like that glitter..." Kris whispered as he licked at Adam's shoulder and down his arm. "Really. Did I mention that I really like the glitter on you?"

"Well, that's an interesting look...." Adam looked down at their wet skin.

Kris laughed as he too looked down. He was never going to forget this sight, this night, the look in Adam's eyes, the look of his body in the glitter. "I should use it as inspiration for painting my apartment walls." 

"You're inspiring.." Adam whispered back, before closing his mouth over Kris' in a deep kiss. He was so writing a song about glitter for his cd.

 

"Mmmm..." Adam sighed happily as he awoke hours later and felt Kris wrapped around him. 

"'m thirsty..." Kris said, mostly asleep, but still clutching onto Adam. He wasn't letting go of the best thing that had ever happened to him. Ever. 

"Me too. I'll get a glass." Adam slowly unraveled Kris from his body and stood up, stretching. He laughed as he felt the residue of glitter on his skin. He'd probably have to throw out those sheets. Who cared? Walking into the bathroom, he turned on the shower light to keep from getting blinded, then stopped to grin at the pale remnants of the patterns Kris had made on his skin. He stepped forward to the sink and closer to the mirror and stopped as he looked at the trail of magenta Kris had left over the left side of his chest. What was that? Oh. Adam smiled nad traced it with his own fingers. The infinity symbol. 

Perfect, he decided as he turned and went back to bed. "Water..." Adam whispered and smiled when Kris blinked and sat up, blindly reaching for the glass. Setting it down, Kris opened his arms and pulled Adam close. "Sweetie... we need to invest in that glitter. Good investment, right?" he asked, kissing Adam's mouth, then his chest, before falling back to sleep.

"Those thirty-eight cents were the best investment I ever made..." Adam agreed, before he too fell back to earth in his lover's arms.


	20. Home improvement

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks  
> Rating: R

**Chapter 20: Home improvement Rating: R**

_Italics = flashbacks_

 

"Is this normal?" Kris asked, his voice breathless.

"Define normal. Or explain why you care." Adam laughed softly as he lubed his fingers and Kris pulled his legs up.

"I mean..." Kris arched under Adam's mouth as his lips traveled down Kris' chest and his fingers slid under his balls. "I...I ...oh yeah, _there_ , oh damn, yes!" He held Adam to his chest, panting as Adam sucked his nipple hard while sliding his fingers into his hole and moving them... "Oh damn, damn..." 

Pulling back for a moment to grab for a condom, Adam asked, "So what's normal?"

Kris flopped back on the mattress and groaned, barely hearing the loud rasp of his breathing over the pounding of his pulse in his ears. When Adam paused, obviously waiting for Kris to answer, he hurried up to say, "I mean, I've never been in a real relationship before, so... is it normal to keep having this much sex?" Kris watched avidly as Adam finished with the condom. When Adam slapped him lightly on the hip, Kris turned onto his hands and knees and looked over his shoulder. Damn. He groaned as Adam settled between his legs and shoved them further apart, before sliding his mouth down Kris' back. 

"Only if you're really lucky. Or hot..." Adam bit into the flesh of Kris' buttocks, before moving forward and claiming his own hot boy. 

"Day-umm..." Kris murmured later, his eyes closed as Adam got up. "You're so good at this. I'm so relaxed..." He smiled as Adam came back to the inflatable bed and laid down next to him. "I can't even get nervous about having a whole bunch of your friends over in my apartment."

"So that's the way to make the hedgehog go away? Fuck the prickliness right out of you?" Adam rubbed Kris' back and smiled as Kris seemed to purr at the contact and wind himself around Adam. Warm and sweet. 

"Sounds like a plan to me..." Kris sighed and kissed Adam's arm. 

"Speaking of plans... About that chair..."

"Uh-oh..." Kris groaned and pulled himself up Adam's body. Bending his head, he kissed Adam's mouth, once, twice and when Adam's lips clung to his and his hand slid up Kris' back to cup his head and pull him deeper into the kiss, Kris sighed. Good. No more Adam plans. Adam plans were how he ended up having his apartment redone via a painting party that would take his entire day off, a day off that could have been spent fucking.

"You're trying to distract me."

"Well, crap." Kris shook his head and began to sit back up, squealing when Adam's hand still on his head pulled him back down.

"I didn't say you failed at it." Adam grinned and squeezed Kris' ass. "Kiss me again. Keep going. Don't stop." 

 

"Stop. Right.There." Kris yelped as Adam picked up the chair and Lane hurried over to help him. Like Adam needed the help; Lane must be there to run interference. "Where do you two think you're going with my chair?"

Lane grinned. "The curb?"

"Ha!" Adam laughed. "You think someone would take it?"

"True enough." Lane nodded. "So..To the dumpster out back?"

"No, of course not!" Adam gasped loudly. "I'm shocked that you think I would summarily destroy one of Kris' favorite possessions. I was just going to put it in the hallway. For its own good."

"Its own good?" Kris repeated.

"Indeed. I mean, we can't leave it in here -- the apartment is too small for the number of people who are going to be here, so we need as much space as possible. It would be a real shame if someone spilled paint all over it."

Danielle spoke up as she came through the open door way, Brian behind her. "Yes, paint might spoil the design. What a shame to the design community, which I'm sure draws so much inspiration from the orange hue of those mushrooms."

"Hey! It's comfy!" Kris protested, hiding his smile.

"It looks comfy," Brian agreed. "A man's gotta have his comfy chair for watching the game and chillin'."

"See!" Kris nodded. Maybe Brian wasn't so bad.

"Except that Kris doesn't watch games in this chair," Adam pointed out. "He..."

"He what?" Everyone chorused. 

"Nothing!" Kris answered in what he hoped was a dismissive voice.

"That was awfully perky..." Danielle said suspiciously. "What do you do in that chair?"

"When a guy says he's up to nothing..." Lane looked from the chair to Adam to Kris and then yelped, dropping her end of the chair. "C'mon! Is that what those stains are?"

"No!" Kris cried out, then began laughing at the disgusted look on Lane's face and satisfied look on Adam's. 

"You're right, Lane. They use that chair for sex. It's their sex chair. That's why Kris wants to keep it." Danielle laughed.

Kris shook his head. "No, seriously, it's just comfy. And it's mine--"

"Then why would Adam want to get rid of it?" Brian asked, honestly confused. "Especially if it's comfy. Seems like he'd want to keep a comfy sex chair."

"Whatever has your perverted mind devised?" Adam looked innocently at Lane and Danielle.

"It's _not_ a sex chair!" Kris protested.

"Sex chair? Wouldn't a sling be better?" Brad asked as he and Allison came through the open doorway. "Especially if that's the chair in question, because, boys, that is ugggg-leeee."

"Are those mushrooms?" Allison asked, confused. "Why would you put mushrooms on a chair? Did you get it at Burning Man?"

"No!" Kris rubbed his face with his hands. "No. I didn't. I've never been to Burning Man."

"We should totally go again!" Brad pointed at Adam and then circled around the room. He even included Brian, so he should get points from his mama for being polite because that guy was a broken condom away from a lifetime of regrets waiting to happen. "All of us."

"We could bring this chair!" Adam nodded. "It would totally fit in."

"My chair is going nowhere!"

"Well, I was just going to put it in the hallway so it wasn't in the way." Adam nodded as Lane sighed and began directing the rest of them to begin taping the woodwork and windows off. 

"Seriously?" Kris asked dubiously.

"Seriously. Although it would be a shame if I tripped and fell and the chair went over the stairway railing and smashed to--"

"Smithereens?" Kris rolled his eyes. "Where were the sound effects and hand gestures?"

"My hands are full of this damn chair." Adam put the chair down and reached out, aiming for Kris' butt, following when Kris laughed and darted away. "I'd rather my hands were full of something else that's quite comfy to lie upon like--" 

**Knock knock**

"I'll get it. Maybe it's the guy from Ugly Furniture Are Us coming to take the chair away!" Adam laughed as Kris rolled his eyes. 

"Drop. The. Chair."

"That is in fact my plan, so thanks for telling me to do just that--"

"I didn't mean that!" Kris protested, following after Adam to the door.

"Say what you mean and mean what you say, the people who matter won't mind and the people who mind don't matter."

"Life by Dr. Seuss." Kris grinned as Adam opened the door. 

"Hannah?" Adam asked in astonishment as he took in Hannah in a pair of old jeans, an older tee-shirt and her hair in a ponytail. And great googly moogly, sneakers? He'd never seen the woman dressed in anything other than the most severe high fashion. "Or is this Hannah's white trash twin, Hannah-Lee?"

"Shut up, Dusty." Hannah grinned as she took in Adam's bare feet, crappy loose jeans and stained tee-shirt. "Or I'll start feeding my chickens near your trailer."

"Oh, stop!" Kris rolled his eyes and gestured for Hannah to come inside. "Thanks for coming." He still couldn't quite believe he had mentioned the painting party in passing and Hannah had offered to come. Then again, he was dating Adam Fucking Lambert and she was nosey. 

"I haven't been to a painting party in years. It's good to keep the skills fresh." Hannah smiled as she held up a six-pack of beer. "As I recall, beer is an essential component."

"Beer? Hannah?" Adam asked. "I've never seen you drink anything other than a vodka martini."

"Good taste -- in case you didn't know it, Adam -- is dressing and behaving appropriately for one's age, figure, and the occasion. Dressing in Donna Karan and drinking martinis would be in bad taste at a painting party." 

"Well, thanks for the advice." Adam grinned. "We all know I need all the edumication I can get in matters of good taste."

"True enough," Lane agreed. "Given what I saw in your Amazon shopping cart yesterday from their sexual health section. And may I say that there are times when ordering your crap under my name leads to fascinating recommendations for me."

"Oh? Like what?" Kris asked eagerly. 

"Paint, boy, paint!" Lane laughed and shoved a roller pan at Kris. 

"Edible glitter is more interesting."

"Edible glitter?" Lane and Hannah echoed. 

"See? Already more interesting." Kris grinned and walked away. 

Adam picked up the chair again. "Now, if you don't mind..."

Kris rushed back. "Hold on! You're not really gonna break my chair, are you?"

"What willl you give me if I don't?"

"A kiss?" Kris puckered up.

Adam bent forward, then stopped. "Sorry. Although a kiss would necessitate closing my eyes so I wouldn't have to see the mushrooms... Nah. Not even close to enough."

"I could...I know!" Kris laughed. "I could shave my balls!"

"Guys shave their balls?" Allison asked, her mouth gaping open in astonishment. "I didn't know that!"

"You should totally tweet that!" Brad urged.

Shoving a roll of blue painter tape into Brad's stomach, Lane smirked. "You should totally start taping off the woodwork along the floor. It's at the perfect height for you." 

 

"Are those your fat jeans?" Neil asked, reaching out to Adam's leg and pinching a loose fold of denim in his fingers.

"What did you say?" Kris barked out instantly and just as immediately put a hand on Adam's back. When Neil had shown up, Kris had been curious to meet Adam's brother, who drove him crazy. Adam had decided to ask Neil here as a way for Kris to meet him when there were, as Adam said, "Plenty of positive people around to mitigate his negativity." Now, Kris knew why. And frowned. "You sure as hell couldn't have said what I thought you said. Nosirreebob." 

"I said--"

"No, you did not. Because that would be mean, first of all and I've met your mom and she sure didn't raise you to be mean. And second of all, don't you work for Adam? So you wouldn't say something to insult your employer. No way. That'd be..." Kris smiled innocently. "Stupid. And I thought you were supposed to be smart." 

Tilting his head, Adam studied Kris and ignored his brother's shock. Well. This was interesting. First the anger, followed by the comforting hand rubbing his back, then the defense, then the innocent smile? Kris did have a little bit of the actor in him. 

Refocusing on the conversation when he caught sight of Lane's urgent waving behind Kris, Adam snapped his head up and made a slicing motion with his hand. "Shut up, Neil and go help Brian tear out carpeting. We can wrap your body up in it later and dump it off the pier." 

"We can use my truck to transport the body," Kris offered.

"Bloodthirsty little elf, aren't you?" Lane grinned, giving Neil -- who still looked gobsmacked at Adam's boyfriend getting in his face -- a push. Ha. Neil and Brian deserved each other. 

"Well. Quite the Papa Bear, aren't you?" Adam asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, yeah. I'm not gonna allow your brother to talk to you like that."

"Why not?" Adam asked, waiting.

"Because you don't deserve that shit. Family should treat each other with respect."

"And yet... you didn't stand up for yourself when it came to your own family."

"Wow!" Kris exclaimed. "I... Wow. A surprise attack."

"Not an attack. A suggestion." Adam squeezed Kris' arm. "Don't you think you deserved that much respect too?"

"I guess... I didn't. I guess I thought I deserved it for... " Kris grimaced. "Letting them down."

"You know better. Right?"

"You know... Yeah. You know what? I do know better. I do." Kris grinned as he looked up into Adam's patient eyes, realizing that he had gone beyond understanding it in his head, he understood it in his heart now too. He was a good guy, he was worth loving and caring about. "You know what? I get it. I'm..." He looked around the tiny apartment, full of people trying to pretend they weren't eavesdropping. "I'm gonna have a new looking apartment, I have a new way of looking at myself, at everything...I feel good. Hey." He grinned. "Isn't there a song you used to sing about that?"

Adam grinned back and began singing, "A new dawn, a new day, a new life for me and ---Mmmph!"

Kris threw his arms around Adam's neck and hugged him tightly, then pulled him down for a loud, smacking kiss.

 

Hannah grinned and elbowed Lane.

"Bloody hell, watch it!" Lane grumbled, struggling to keep from dropping the roller full of paint.

"No, you watch it. Those two -- they are a good match."

"Well, of course they are! That's why I matchmaked them in the coffee shop."

"Oh, puh-leeze." Hannah rolled her eyes. "You had nothing to do with it."

"Oh really? And I suppose you did?"

"Actually, I did suggest once to Kris, early on, that they might be a good match, but I think he listened to me about that as much as he listened to me about singing in coffee shops and at open mic nights...." 

__

_Hannah smiled. "We like you, Kris. I wish I had better news for you. I wish I could give you a happy ending right now. I'll bottom line it for you. Mr. Brush is not going to sign you_ right now _because we can't sell you to a label_ right now _. You need time and polish and seasoning. You need to develop at least a local following. Those positives will help counter the negative of you being gay to a label. Sorry, but that's the truth."_

_Kris swallowed hard over the sharp lump in his throat and looked down. "I appreciate your honesty. And your advice. No one else gave me any advice, so I do appreciate it."  
He swallowed again and looked back up. "Is there any work..."_

_"Geoffrey and I can get you some session work. We'd be happy to do so."_

_"I'd sincerely appreciate that. This town is expensive."_

_"Indeed it is."_

_"I...hesitate to push, but really, any work you can give me would be awesome. I'll take anything."_

_"I'll keep that in mind. And don't hesitate to push -- in this town, you need to get aggressive and take every opportunity." Hannah stood and held out her hand. "You keep working on your music, get in front of people again and perform. Learn the craft of your art. Then try us again in a few months. And we'll keep you in mind."_

_"Thanks, ma'am."_

_"Now I'm not old enough to be ma'amed!" Hannah exclaimed with a smile. Shoving her business card into Kris' hand, she added, "Listen, call me. We do believe you have potential -- I think you're being oversensitive and not hearing that. Listen_ up. _When you get a gig, even at a bar? Call me. I'll be happy to give you a critique. Free. No strings."_

_"That's.... really nice of you," Kris mumbled, knowing he'd never call. He didn't want pity._

_"I can read your face. Don't cut off that cute nose to spite it. And are you really not dating anyone?" Hannah asked. "Because I might know someone..."_

_"No, I..." Kris shook his head._

_"Are you sure? Because I think you'd be perfect together."_

 

Hannah stopped and watched Adam and Kris teasing each other again and sighed. "Let's be honest. All they really needed was to be in the same place at the same time and nature would take its course."

"Humph. Sometimes nature needs a push." Lane gestured with her chin towards the wall. "And how about you push that roller brush across the wall instead of standing around, _supervising_."

"Yeah, especially since that's my job!" Tommy interrupted as he stood in the doorway. Hannah and Lane squabbled like sisters. Speaking of siblings, Neil was here? Oh hell. Although, he looked oddly... put upon. Watching quietly for a moment, he noted Neil's sullen glances toward Kris. Hmm. Had Kris done something to shut Neil up? Now, he'd have to thank the guy again. "Hey, Kris!"

"Hi, Tommy." Seeing the mischief in Tommy's eyes, Kris immediately asked, "Are you gonna thank me again for having sex with Adam?"

"Nah. Given the way you wiggle around on his lap all happy every time I see you two, I figure you're getting what you deserve." 

Adam laughed and Kris blushed. "And you get your free time too."

"Win win!" Tommy agreed enthusiastically, noting how Kris slid his hand into Adam's and held on. Very cute. "You don't even know, man."

"Here we go..." Adam muttered, deciding he should make sure there was room for Tommy inside that rug along with Neil.

"Thanks to you, we have a life outside the rehearsal studio now. Seriously, he was a total workaholic before you came along. We're so glad you're here distracting him with sex. Yeah. I'd pay you myself--"

"What does that mean?" Kris absently played with Adam's ring and got distracted. "Hey, you really shouldn't be wearing a ring when we're painting. You could ruin it."

"Okay, Papa Bear." Adam laughed.

"Bears are not your type." Tommy grinned. Nope. This Kris was Adam's type, southern accent and all. "But clearly Kris is. Like I said, I'd have personally paid your way--"

"The point is that Tommy is cheap, so if he's parting with his money, it must be important," Lane interjected, trying to fill in the blanks for Kris. 

"I'm not cheap. I just have different priorities than you do," Tommy shot back. When Lane opened her mouth, Tommy hurried to say, "The band is relieved you're keeping Adam busy so --"

"So you can do important things like help Neil rip up the carpet?"

"Nah. Neil and Dani's boyfriend look like they've got it covered." Tommy leaned forward. 

"Actually..." Brian stood up. "We're ready to move onto the kitchen flooring, which I do believe is actual linoleum. Like from the seventies, I think."

"Matches the mushroom chair. Might be a mistake to pull it up since we're designing the room around that chair." Danielle teased. "That new stuff that looks like tile might be a design no-no given that it's from this century." 

"Thanks again, for getting me a good deal on the floor stuff," Kris interjected, pointing at the grey Berber carpet and the pale grey vinyl flooring. "I appreciate it."

"No problem. Some good has to come out of this crap job." Brian shrugged while watching Neil and Tommy roll up the old carpet and cough at the dust raised. "Gotta keep the old man off my back, ya know?"

"I uh know something about trying to please the old man," Kris agreed. Damn it, no way did he want to have anything in common with Brian.

"Yeah. He thinks this is a worthwhile career for me. I think it pays the rent while I'm waiting for my big break."

Kris sighed in relief when he noted how Brian's eyes slanted in Adam's direction when he raised his voice when speaking about waiting for his big break. Nope, they were not similar. He'd never tell Brian that the money he'd used for the new flooring was a loan from Adam. One he intended to pay back asap by helping Adam with his fan mail. If Brian knew Adam's money was involved, he probably would have jacked the price up. 

 

"I have an idea about how to make this plain blue paint pop!" Brad called out.

"It doesn't need to pop. It just needs to de-dingy-fy the place," Kris retorted.

"Yeah, right. Now, seriously, we could mix glitter into this paint..." Brad suggested.

"He's kidding, right?" Kris whispered at Adam. "Or wait... Did you _tell_ him....?"

"No. I'm saving that story for a song." Adam shrugged as Kris gasped, then gaped, then began laughing.

"You wouldn't."

"Why not? You would."

"Wha-- How do you know?" Kris asked, squinting his eyes.

"I heard you humming a tune the next morning, then you left notes on the Chinese take out menu in my take out menu drawer."

"Oh. I didn't do that deliberately, you know. I wasn't trying to get you to read my music or anything--" Kris blushed

"I know, hedgehog." Adam smiled as he leaned forward and whispered, "Sorry, even I have limits and I'm not taking you into the bathroom and fucking the prickliness out of you with all these people here."

"Okay. You can owe me." Kris smiled back.

"I'm waiting here!" Brad exclaimed impatiently. 

Adam pointed his brush in Brad's direction. "That wouldn't work, Brad. The glitter would end up mostly buried. You'd have to throw glitter at the walls while the paint is still freshly wet."

"Freshly wet..." Brad sighed. "I like the imagery." 

"Humph," Kris grumbled. "I'd like it if you focused on the imagery of freshly-painted PLAIN walls." 

"Figures, Mr. Plaid and Plain." Brad sniffed. 

"He's not plain. He's pretty damn spectacular. Especially when he's naked and has a tube of glitter in his hand." Adam leered in Kris' direction and slapped him on the butt, then started when his phone buzzed and walked into the hallway.

Kris blushed, then looked down at the paint and blushed again. It was one thing to joke about the glitter in front of Lane and...why was that? Lane was... a friend now, that was it. Then again, maybe Brad was becoming a friend too. A really sparkly friend. 

Brad laughed. "Apparently even a good ol' boy from Arkansas can enjoy edible glitter."

"It was... sweet." Kris grinned. "How did you know I was from Arkansas?"

"The accent. I'm from Texas. You and I should get together some time and swap stories of how we escaped the red hills."

"Oh." Kris blinked in surprise. He had gone to the movies with Lane a few times and now he had another offer of a social life. "Yeah, sure. That would be great." Kris smiled, then leaned closer and asked, "Did Adam put you up to this?"

"No. I'm fully capable of devising my own grand plans, thankyouverymuch."

"Yo!" John called from the doorway. "Did someone order from Ugly Furniture Are Us? Because that's a damn ugly chair in the hallway."

"Adammmm...." Kris growled, then looked around. Where the hell was Adam? 

"Luckily, at Used But Nice Furniture Are Us we are here to help!" John grinned. "Let's bring 'er in!" He turned around and went back out, coming in with one end of a futon frame, the other end held up by Adam. "Thanks for loaning me your truck, Kris."  
"You borrowed it to pick up a futon?" Kris asked in confusion.

"Well, it wasn't going to fit in my Mustang." Adam smiled as he and John brought the frame into the room. 

"But..." Kris shook his head. 

"Before you get all prickly on me--" John held up his hand. "I got it from my brother. He wasn't using it and his wife was happy to get it out of the house."

"But still..." Kris bit his lip. "I don't want charity."

"Oh for god's sakes!" John rolled his eyes. "It's not charity when it's friends helping each other out."

"But I'm not friends with your brother."

"My god, you are so damn stubborn. Which I expected! Ha!" John grinned. "So I told my brother that you'd pay him back by singing at the little coffeehouse he manages out near Santa Monica."

"You what?" Kris gaped. 

Hannah clapped. "Finally. Let me know when you're playing, Kris, so that I can come out and give a listen." 

"Mebbee..." Kris mumbled. He wasn't ready to get back on a stage, but knew if he refused everyone would argue with him. It was easiest to go along and then avoid it later. 

"Sure...." Adam said under his breath. He knew that face -- it was Kris' "I'll play along now and avoid it later" face. Same face he used every time Adam or Lane brought up the idea of watching the Arkansas videos. Adam had an idea of how to get Kris back on a stage, but Kris was probably expecting him to argue. "I don't know what's up with your refusal to get on a stage, hedgehog, but it's like riding a horse. You need to get back up on it or it seems scarier than it really is."

"Like you've ever ridden a horse."

"No. But I've totally screwed up on stage. Complete with ninja roll. In front of seven million people, remember?" 

"Oh, yeah." Kris nodded. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

"I'm always right." Adam smirked.

"You're always annoying." Kris rolled his eyes. 

"Always? That's not what you were saying a few hours ago."

 

"Thanks, y'all..." Kris sighed as he looked around his apartment. Nearly unrecognizable. Hours of work, new paint, new flooring, open windows, and a few beers in and this place looked amazing. He tossed an empty beer bottle into the recycling bin and smiled. He had a recycling bin now too. Turning back to the group in a circle on his new carpet, he smiled as Brad fussed at everyone to keep on the old sheet he was using like a picnic blanket. Brad was more worried about keeping his carpet clean than he was. Then again, he decided as he walked back toward him and smiled at Adam who was smiling at him, he had much more important things to focus on. 

"No problemo!" Allison smiled as she pulled another piece of pizza from the box and sat back next to Danielle. "So what are you guys doing for Halloween? You never said and Adam's party is in two weeks!"

Looking down, Kris shrugged and lightly kicked Adam's foot, shoving it aside. He grinned and sat down in the juncture of Adam's legs, sighing happily when Adam wrapped his arm around Kris' waist and pulled him tight up against him. 

"We're thinking about a couple's costume," Adam answered when Kris was snuggled up against him. 

Kris laughed. "We are not doing Gumby and Pokey." 

"Chocolate and peanut butter?" Dani suggested. 

Tommy shook his head. "Thing One and Thing Two."

"I call dibs on that for me and Alisan!" Allison exclaimed. 

"Dorothy and Toto."

"Now...." Adam nodded. "That one has possibilities. I could carry Kris around all night in a basket."

"I could bite you." Kris snapped at Adam's shoulder.

Sliding his hand into Kris' hair, Adam pulled his head back and took a nip out of Kris' neck. When Kris gasped, Adam grinned and asked, "And biting's a negative?" 

Brian suggested, "Bullwinkle and Rocky, Boris and Natasha."

"Magician and bunny." 

"Ball and chain?"

"Washer and dryer?"

"Butt plug and cock ring?" Brad laughed. "I'd pay good money to watch your Twitter feed explode when those pictures get out." 

"Simon Cowell and a mirror." Allison held her hand up and Adam high-fived it.

Adam grinned. "Although, nah. That sounds more like a Valentine's Day costume party in which couples come as each other's one true love." 

Hannah snorted. "Then Geoffrey would come as himself and a videocamera." 

"And Adam would come as himself and a bottle of glitter."

Adam shook his head and hugged Kris. "That would be Kris and a certain tube of--"

"Ahem!" Kris cleared his throat, even as he curled his hand over Adam's where it rested on his stomach. "How about Hugs and Kisses?"

"OMG..." Brad groaned.

"I know!" Allison nodded. "OMG and LOL -- hey, we all could go as text speak!"

 

"So, talk to me..." Adam leaned back against the futon, enjoying the relative silence now that it was just the two of them in Kris' undingy apartment. "What did you think -- this was the first time so many of my friends were all here in one place?"

"Dry run for your Halloween party?"

"Something like that..." Adam smiled as Kris sat down on his lap and wiggled around. Grasping Kris' hips in his hands, Adam pulled Kris around until he was straddling him. "But tell me, give me your run-down of the cast of characters."

"Hmmm..." Kris shoved his hips forward, smiling when Adam's eyes momentarily crossed. He laughed. "Didn't your mama ever tell you that your eyes could get that way permanent?"

"Didn't your mama ever tell you it was rude not to answer a question?"

"Damn." Kris grinned ruefully and looked down. Which was maybe not his best option, because the glambulge was honestly distracting. "Okay, here goes. Your brother annoys the crap out of me with his little zingers. If you're not gonna punch him in the face because your mother told you to play nice, I will. Brad is growing on me, but not like a fungus. Maybe a really good mushroom. Allison is great. Love her. She can be my little sister too, right?"

Smiling gently at the eager hopefulness on Kris' face, Adam agreed, "Of course. She really likes you. Has right from the beginning." 

When Adam nodded, Kris continued. "Lane, well, she's... I hope... I really like Lane." 

Kris bit his lip. Truthfully, Lane was his favorite person in LA after Adam. And maybe Adam's mom. 

Adam smiled and curved his hands around Kris' buttocks. He liked these conversations with Kris on his lap. "She likes you too. I have a strong feeling you're going to be her gay boyfriend. Minus the fashion sense, but that's what she has me for." 

"Yeah, you're a real fashion icon right now, Glambert." Kris grinned and motioned toward Adam's clean, but disreputable tee-shirt and sweatpants.

"According to Hannah, good taste is all about... And hey, what's up with Hannah painting today?" 

"That was weird, wasn't it?" Kris shrugged. "I think she was making sure I was treating her favorite pet vocalist right."

"Ugh. My thoughts exactly." Adam grimaced. "She's so damn nosey. Okay, so go on."

"Well, if Tommy will ever stop thanking me for having sex with you, that would be great. And Dani is awesome. Sweet and fun and..."

"Blind as a bat when it comes to Brian."

"Oh, thank god!" Kris exhaled in relief. "I thought you liked him now."

"No. I was just playing nice with him. I know damn well that he didn't give you a deal on the flooring to be nice. He gave you a deal because--"

"He's hoping to score points with you." Kris nodded. "I figured that if he knew you'd loaned me the money, he'd have charged double. Ugh. I wish Dani would see... I can see, sometimes, how he's fun and he has his moments, but I don't trust him. My Spidey senses are tingling around that guy."

"Mine too. I already said my piece to Dani -- more than once. She doesn't want to hear it, so at this point, the more I push the more she's gonna push back, right? I'm playing nice right now and hoping she sees the light. If not..." He sighed "I'll be there to pick up the pieces the way she did for me."

Kris nodded. "That's about all you can do. I remember once, this friend of mine was goin' out with this girl who just wanted a cute guy to go to prom so her prom pictures would be nice and we all told him, but he wouldn't listen. She dumped him on the way home from prom." 

"Which friend? The guy whose name is like a cabbage?"

Kris laughed. "You mean, Cale?"

"Yeah, him. I remember him from Lane's videos. He was definitely interested in hearing from you. Which you'd know if you'd consent to watch those videos. And--" Adam held up his hand as Kris began to protest. "I swear, I'll shut up about it after this. But I want you to think about today-- some of the people in our circle are awesome, some are less so. I had to cut some people out of the circle after Idol because they were like Brian -- wanting some advantage, some monetary benefit -- and no loss. But others of them are true friends, like family. Stands to reason that your circle of friends would be similar, right? People aren't that different no matter where you are." 

Adam shut his mouth and waited. Kris was going to ponder this idea for a bit. 

Sliding forward, Kris rested his forehead against Adam's shoulder while he thought. 

Adam's friends and family were a mix. And some of Adam's friends had proven less trustworthy than others, some had been cut, and some more had been added. Adam's ex-boyfriend, the guy Lane referred to as "he-shall-not-be-named', had actually gotten to know Adam because he had been the friend of a friend of a friend. And on the other hand, Adam's ex had become one of his best friends. Allison was still close, while most everyone else from Idol were now just acquaintances. So... maybe that was the way it was once you... grew up. Circles formed, changed, reformed. He had a new circle or two. Maybe... 

But what if... Kris winced. "I'll think about it. Seriously think about it. And..." He raised his head and stared in shock at Adam's face. "You actually stayed quiet."

"Thank god you're done thinking!" Adam sighed in relief. "You were quiet for ten minutes."

"Ohmigod, a record for you!" Kris teased.

"That's okay. I was thinking..." 

"Uh-oh." Kris smiled. "What evil plan have you devised?"

"Who, me?" Adam smiled back. "I was thinking of giving you your housewarming gift."

"What? I don't need a gift!" Kris protested. "You already gave me everything -- I mean, your friends came over and --"

"They'll be your friends too, Kris," Adam said softly, but firmly. "They like you -- for you."

"But--" Kris broke off. His mama would smack him for refusing to accept someone being genuinely nice. That was super rude. "Okay. And thanks. Thanks again for loaning me the money."

"My pleasure." Adam smiled. That argument had taken two weeks and lots of sex. And an offer for Kris to work off the sum by helping with the fan mail. Lane's idea and a good one it was too. Win-win. Then again, the sex had been-- 

"You're remembering all the sex we had while you were talking me into borrowing that money."

"Yeah. Do you need to borrow anything else?" Adam asked.

"No. Which is why I don't need a housewarming gift."

"Oh yes, you do. In fact, I know you want one of these." 

Kris ground his crotch against Adam's. "I already have a glambulge all to myself." Tilting forward, he kissed Adam, sighing as Adam's lips parted and his tongue swept into Kris' mouth, teasing and tasting. "Yeah, I've also got the best kisser with the most talented tongue everywhere. What else does a guy need?"

"Oh, I think you'll want this...." Adam smiled and gently shoved Kris aside and hurried into the bathroom.

"Is it bigger than a breadbox?" Kris called out. "Which is a stupid question. When's the last time you've seen a breadbox?"

"Are we going to play Twenty Questions or are you just going to open your gift?" Adam asked, holding a large, wrapped box up in his arms.

"A gift?" Kris grinned. "Last time, it was a toothbrush. This is way bigger than a toothbrush. Maybe it's a new enema kit because I'm gonna wear mine out?"

Adam cracked up. "No..." He laughed again. "Although it is a sex toy."

Kris stepped back. "Whoa. That's an awfully big sex toy. It's not one of those inflatable butt plugs because--"

"Where the hell did you hear about an inflatable butt plug?"

"The internet." Kris rolled his eyes. "I told you -- My sex life in Arkansas was mostly via Google. Oh and hey -- I wanna know what belongs to you that's in Lane's Amazon shopping cart --"

"Focus!" Adam shoved the box toward Kris, who took a step back. 

"And I'm still a little worried about the size of that box."

"Wow. Mr. Size Queen has actually found something too big?" Adam teased, while shaking the box. "See? No loose parts..." 

"Is it... hard?"

"Oh hell, we _are_ playing Twenty Questions." Adam rolled his eyes. "Yes, it's hard. And sturdy." 

"Sturdy?" Kris licked his lower lip. "Which means it's meant to stand up to hard or rough usage?"

"Or regular usage. Ohmigod!" Adam moved quickly and shoved the box at Kris. "Open it." 

"Okay, already!" Kris grumbled, ripping the paper off. Dropping the paper to the floor, he stared at the box. "A..."

"A foot stool!" Adam grinned. "Remember the chair and how you wanted--"

"Oh yeah, baby!" Kris tore into the box and pulled out the wooden foot stool that had... "Oh god!" He burst out laughing. The heavy wooden stool was quite wide and it had his name carved into the step. "It's really wide."

"So you can spread your legs." 

"So I can..." Kris stood up and carried the step stool over to the chair and placed it on the floor behind it. He pulled off his shirt and grabbed Adam's hand. "C'mon. Let's break it in."


	21. Sharp edges and sweet tongues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blocks of italics = flashbacks  
> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 21: Sharp edges and sweet tongues**

_Rattle_  
ratttle  
rattle 

Kris sighed as he turned off his truck in Adam's driveway and waited for the truck to stop shaking. Leno's mechanic had shown him how to fix it himself this time, which definitely felt like the "teach a man to fish" good idea, but unless he wanted to dip into his account, he still needed to save up for the parts. Oh well. It was a gorgeous day. 

He hopped out of the truck, slammed the door and took a deep breath, leaning against the closed door. Not too much smog. Sunny for early November. He was going to visit and cook Sunday brunch for Lane and Adam. Lane, who was becoming his best friend and his boyfriend, who was Adam Fucking Lambert. And just had to be the sweetest, hottest, nicest guy ever. Who worked too hard, like way too hard, like today he only had two hours free and it was a Sunday, so Kris couldn't even imagine him being worse the way Tommy said he'd been before that day Adam had taken him to the studio for the first time and put the full court press on him. He hadn't believed at first that Lane and Leila could use his help with the fan mail, but they actually could, so it was a win-win. Seemed like a lot of his life right now was a win-win. 

Life was good and he finally felt like he could thank God for his blessings and... surely this was a turn-around, surely he was due for a good run... Right? Right? He shivered and hurried toward the door. Adam would warm him up. He always did. 

 

"We want to talk to you." Adam stood up along with Lane and smiled as Kris came into the living room. Kris would be happy in the end. He'd complain and carry on and go into full hedgehog mode, but good news would prevail.

"Oh, hell no." Kris stared at Adam and Lane and back to Adam again. If Lane was here with Adam, then it had to be really bad stuff. Really bad. Ignoring the smile, he swallowed over a hard lump in his throat and asked huskily, "Are you dumping me?"

"What?" Adam stared back at Kris, then at Lane who looked as surprised as he felt, then back at Kris. "Why would you think that? And why would I do that with Lane here?"

"I.... When someone says they want to talk to you like that... nothing good is coming. Wait!" Kris gasped. "Did you cheat on me?"

"When would he have time?" Lane blurted out. 

" _Whaaaaat_?!" Adam glared indignantly at Kris and stomped forward to stand in front of him with crossed arms. "Well, that's great. That's fantastic that you immediately jump to that conclusion!" 

"Don't tell me you're mad at me now! You started it!" Kris poked Adam's arm, then jumped when Adam clamped his hand down on Kris' shoulder.

"By what? Saying I want to talk to you?" Adam remembered his mother's relationship advice that it was best if only one person was mad at a time and forced himself to calm down. Seeking to connect, he squeezed Kris' shoulder. Kris was in full-on hedgehog,  
offensive mode but not for what he'd expected. Best laid plans... as per usual, with Kris. 

"Oh. My. God. Not again." Lane walked into the foyer and sat down on the padded bench there. This was going to take a while. And that super-easy-going guy touted by all of his Arkansas friends and family seemed to be AWOL. Damn insecurities. She'd like to pop Neil Allen herself. She knew, just knew, that whenever Kris got bloody mad it was due to something from Gopher Flats. 

"In _that_ tone!" Kris pointed his finger at Adam. "You're not my father!" He exclaimed, his hand clenching as tightly as his jaw. Feeling the heat of anger rip through him, he glared at Adam, then seeing a spark of ... understanding in his eyes replace the irritation with concern, looked away in embarrassment. "I did it again..." he moaned under his breath.

"Ah." Adam took a breath. "I inadvertently tripped your trigger. Kris. Look at me." When Kris steadfastly kept looking out the window, Adam reached up and turned Kris' face back to him. "I'm not them. Any more than you are the assholes in my past. I just told you I love you. Remember? You said you trusted me."

"I know, but..." Unable to evade the strong grip Adam had on his jaw, Kris settled for slanting his gaze to the side. 

"I know, but..." Adam lowered his voice and in a credible imitation of Kris' accent, finished, "My parents said they loved me, but they threw me out anyway."

Kris gasped and looked up as Adam verbalized his fear, his deepest fear. Seeing the warmth in Adam's eyes, Kris collapsed against him, sighing when Adam wrapped his arms around him. "You.. you just sunk my battleship."

Tilting Kris' head up, Adam smiled down at him. "And here I thought you telling me you loved me was the most dangerous conversation we were going to have."

 

_"Aaadam?" Kris gasped, standing in his kitchen, talking into his phone."I thought you were at the photo shoot--"_

_"Finished early. Why are you breathless? Is everything okay?"_

_"I'm..." Kris grinned. "I'm standing here in my kitchen. Naked. And wet."_

_"Well, that sounds more than okay to me."_

_"But you're not here, so... No. Everything's not okay."_

_"What were you doing? Taking a shower?"_

_"No. I was... uh... oh hell, I was trying to shave my balls. It's freaking impossible!"_

_Adam burst out laughing at the frustration in Kris' voice. "Do you need an instructional video?"_

_"Apparently I do need instruction." Kris smiled. "Would you like to instruct me? You could boss me around all you want while you get what you want."_

_"Well, this is a hard decision. Go home and sleep or go to your house and boss you around while you're naked. A very hard decision, indeed."_

_"I bet."_

_"I need the sleep, but... temptation, temptation. And your sort of temptation always makes me happy. Then again, I could sleep later."_

_"I do love how when you put your mind to it, you can solve all sorts of problems."_

_"My mind is not the organ solving this problem, babe." Adam smiled as he took an exit off of the freeway so he could reroute himself to Kris' apartment. "So I will come over, but I have another idea."_

_"Uh-oh," Kris said automatically, even as he knew he was nearly twitching with anticipation. "Do tell!"_

_"Instead of instructing you, I could do it for you while you sit there. All submissively."_

_"Oh...fuck..." Kris moaned at the image Adam's words painted in his head._

_"Would you do that? Sit there all submissively while I shaved you the way I want? So I can lick and suck your balls as much as I want?"_

_"Oh fuck! I'll do anything you want if you get here in the next thirty minutes. One minute after that I can't promise anything other than you seeing me lick the cum off my hand after I jerk off."_

_"Oh fuck!" Adam nearly yelled. "I'll be there." He pressed the phone and concentrated on weaving through traffic._

_Kris grinned down at his phone. This day was improving by the second._

_Adam caught sight of the smile on his face as he looked in the back-view mirror while changing lanes as he turned onto Kris' street. He chuckled as he recalled the photographer wanting him to have a "soft" expression on his face. The photographer had urged Adam to think of someone he cared deeply about. Even loved. Lane had laughed knowingly. It had been no surprise, not really, when Kris' face had instantly popped into his mind. The photographer had to tell him to stop grinning, eventually._

_It was true. He did love Kris. The only question was how to tell him. Adam thought as he quickly scaled the stairs to Kris' apartment. A restaurant setting seemed too common, as did clubbing. Maybe the Griffith Observatory? Maybe geocaching -- Hmm. That was an idea. He could put a note in a box and make Kris find it. He could write a song, but that might take too long because Adam knew himself well enough to know now that he'd want to make the song perfect -- which would take time but, now that he'd made the decision, he'd want to just move forward. The quickest way would be a romantic dinner at home -- but was home special enough... Geocaching was better. And was he over-thinking this?_

_Kris bounced excitedly on the balls of his feet as he heard Adam's knock on the door, followed by the sound of his key in the lock. He rushed over and held himself slightly behind the door as Adam pushed it open. "Adam--"_

_"You're naked!" Adam exclaimed in surprise and grinned, while slamming the door shut and reaching for Kris by curling his hands around Kris' hips and over his back to pull him close. Kris stepped into his embrace and wound his arms around Adam's back. Adam kept smiling as he bent his head and Kris tilted his up for a kiss. A welcome home kiss. He could get used to this and... yeah, he loved Kris' skin ... all of this. All of him. He pulled back and ran his hands up and down Kris' body. "Wow, my day just improved drastically."_

_"So did mine!" Kris hugged Adam. He hated when Adam did photo shoots -- he always got way too critical about his appearance, which was so fucking ridiculous, but... it was real to Adam._

_Sliding his hands down Kris' bare back to cup his butt, Adam moaned in appreciation. "You know, I think we need to make a rule that you're always naked..."_

_"Only if it's a rule for you too!"_

_"I'm not as pretty as you are..." Adam demurred, gently pushing Kris back to look at him, slowly dragging his eyes up and down, licking his lips when Kris' cock began to harden under his gaze. Gods, the boy was responsive. And all his._

_"That's your opinion, which is about as based in reality as Pearline's opinion that snakes will cure rheumatism." Kris grinned._

_"Speaking of snakes..." Adam grinned back and wrapped his hand around Kris' cock and gently stroked downward to his balls. "Time to shed--"_

_"Well, not some skin!" Kris shuddered. "So are you really gonna..." He blushed, then moaned as Adam's hand worked its magic. He really had to finish that song about Adam's touch. Maybe... someday, he'd sing it for Adam._

_"Oh _hell_ , yeah." Adam bent his head and once again took Kris' lips, this time in a deep kiss, slanting his mouth across Kris' and sweeping his tongue inside to proclaim need and claim possession. When their lips parted for a breath, Adam asked, "You're really going to let me do it?"_

_"Sure. I trust you." Kris tugged at Adam's tee-shirt. "Take it off for me."_

_The shirt dropped on the kitchen counter en route to the bathroom, Adam paused to pull off his boots and socks while Kris waited in the bathroom door._

_"Do you want me to hum a tune?" Kris asked. "For your striptease?"_

_"Sit down and spread your legs for me," Adam ordered, while pulling his jeans off. "Now."_

_"I love it when you talk sweet to me." Kris sat down on the toilet lid and spread his legs._

_"I can tell." Adam grinned as he looked at Kris' cock pointing up at him. While Kris plucked a wet washcloth from the sink, Adam grabbed the razor and the shaving cream off of the sink and knelt down between Kris' legs._

_**Bang** _

_"Damn it!" Adam swore while Kris laughed. Adam's feet had hit the wall. Kris scooted around and Adam tried to move but_

_**Bang** _

_His feet hit the tub._

_Adam stood up to try and figure out how to make them fit. "This bathroom is too small. And geometry was never my strong suit."_

_"You have long legs..." Kris said absently, watching Adam's ass as he twisted around trying to find room. "Have I mentioned how much I reallly like your ass and how your legs go on forever?"_

_"You're just trying to butter me up because I'm going to have a razor on your balls."_

_"No, actually..." Kris shook his head, then got distracted as Adam turned around once again and he was eyeball to cockhead with the glambulge. Yummm.... He bent forward and gave Adam a quick lick._

_"Ye-ooh!" Adam shrieked in surprise, then began laughing. "Stop, stop--"_

_"You're actually saying no to me licking your cock?"_

_"That does seem stupid, doesn't it?" Adam laughed again. "But I have plans for your newly shaven balls. So focus. You can't sit on the tub, not enough room..." Adam frowned, then nodded. "I know -- your chair. You can sit on your chair--"_

_"You're just hoping to ruin the chair with shaving cream." Kris grinned._

_"Hedgehog, that chair has clearly seen worse than shaving cream." Adam led the way back into the apartment and nodded in the direction of the chair. "Sit down while I get a towel to put under you. Wouldn't want to ruin your new carpet with your wet balls." Adam stared at Kris while he licked his lower lip._

_"You are gonna kill me." Kris groaned as he sat down on the chair. He looked up while Adam put down the razor and shaving cream and waited for Adam to order him around some more._

_"No. I'm going to spread you, shave you, lick you, suck you, and rim you."_

_"Fuck!" Kris moaned._

_"Well, that too."_

_Kris heard himself whimper, surprised he could hear anything over the pounding of the pulse in his ears. He whispered, "Adammmm...."_

_"Stroke yourself for me." Adam nodded at Kris and waited until Kris complied. His skin flushed with heat as he watched Kris' hand. "Keep doing that while I get some water."_

_"Can we hurry up?" Kris asked impatiently when Adam went to the kitchen and filled a bowl with warm water._

_"I did tell you that you needed to be submissive while I did this, didn't I?" Adam shook his head as he stared at his amused reflection in the black square of the curtainless window above Kris' kitchen sink. Kris liked to play the game, but he was less and less submissive with each day._

_Craning his neck so he could see Adam's ass, Kris agreed quickly, "Yes."_

_"Good. I'm not going to remind you again. And did I give you permission to stop?"_

_Adam waited until Kris resumed stroking himself, needing Kris to be at least as excited by his bossiness as he was by Kris' acquiescence. He set the bowl down, then went back to his discarded jeans and pulled out lube and condoms. Glancing back up, he saw Kris open his mouth -- undoubtedly to once again urge him to hurry and shook his head. "Why don't you spend your energy getting ready? Spread your legs for me. Slide forward."_

_"Like this?" Kris asked as he moved until his butt was on the edge and his feet were in front of the chair legs. He looked at Adam's cock, which was just as good as his face for telling him if he was doing it right. Yup, doing it right._

_Bending forward, Adam slid his hand under Kris' balls and lifted, hearing Kris' breath catch and then a low moan as he gently squeezed. "Lift your cock up for me...That's it..." Adam bent down and quickly licked the head of Kris' cock, then engulfed it into his mouth, while his fingers pulled and stroked on Kris' balls._

_"Oh hell, what does this have to do with..." Kris clamped his hands on the arms of the chair and lifted his hips up, his body urging him deeper into Adam's mouth._

__Pop_ _

_"Just checking out the angle," Adam said with a shrug, hiding his grin at the dazed look on Kris' face. "You need to be tilted up more..."_

_"I could put my legs over your shoulders. It's not like they haven't made that trip before." Kris grinned._

_"Nice thought...." Adam stroked Kris' legs from ankle over calf and up his thighs. "Nice legs too, by the way, but having them on my shoulders would impede my movements and as I recall from past occurrences of your legs on my shoulders, you have a tendency to squeeze and..."_

_Adam tickled Kris' balls, grinning when Kris laughed and his legs jumped. "I'd hate to have you press my shoulder -- which is connected to my arm which is connected to my hand -- and make that razor jump. Know what I mean?"_

_Kris covered his balls. "I....yeah. My legs are too short," he complained as Adam continued moving him around, trying for the best angle._

_Adam grinned and raised an eyebrow. "I have the solution. Your stool. It will force your knees up."_

_"My stool. The best present ever!" Kris laughed as Adam stood up, walked behind the chair and grabbed the stool and put it in front._

_"Mmm. Ever? I don't know. I'm still partial to the He-Man Castle I got when I was a kid." Adam smiled as Kris put his feet on the stool and spread his legs._

_Sliding forward, Kris noted, "I'll have to see if I can beat that present some day."_

_"Well, this is a damn awesome gift. I can't wait to run my tongue over your smooth balls." Adam trailed his fingers over the area in question._

_"Ohmigod, just do it. Puh-leeze."_

_"Don't rush me." Adam reached into the water, patted his wet hand onto Kris' balls, then with a grin, smoothed shaving cream on. 1, 2--_

_"Hoo, shit, that's cold!" Kris shrieked._

_"I know. But better than having your balls waxed, right?"_

_"Waxed?" Kris gaped. "How would you not pass out and--- Oh!" Kris cried out in surprise as Adam once again bent his head and sucked the head of his cock into his mouth._

_"There. It needs to be nice and hard so it can stay out of the way."_

_"Sure..." Kris gulped as Adam picked up the razor._

_"Don't move."_

_"I'm not moving." Kris held his breath as Adam gently pressed the razor against his skin._

_"You have to breathe, you know."_

_"No, I don't." Kris waited and let out a long sight as Adam scraped the razor against his skin, then reached down and shook the razor in the bowl of water._

_"Are you going to faint?"_

_"Pfffft." Kris shook his head. "No way. I'm a man, I can take it..." Kris trailed off as Adam flicked his tongue across the underside of his cock, sliding his tongue across Kris' fingers and then lower, before moving back up to nurse on the head._

_"Good. Take some more..." Adam whispered before sucking Kris' cock back into his mouth._

_Kris looked down at Adam, wondering why he was hearing this loud raspy sound before realizing it was his own harsh breathing as his cock hardened in Adam's warm mouth. He lifted his hands to Adam's hair and slid his fingers along his scalp, holding him close. He blinked slowly as Adam raised his head and resumed shaving him, his body too heavy with thickened blood and need to move, the rhythm of Adam's movements mirroring the pounding of his pulse, punctuated by the  
_ scraaaaaaaape __  
of the razor across his skin and the  
splishsplash _  
of the razor in the bowl of water, followed by the sight of Adam bending his head and sucking the head of his cock. Then starting over again._

_Tasting the pre-come flowing from Kris' cock, Adam licked his lips and looked into Kris' face. He looked astonished and needy and... all spread out like that, incredibly sexy. And the expression in his eyes -- the desire and amazement directed at him -- made him feel sexier than he'd felt in... who knows. All he knew for certain was that he wanted more of it, to give more of it to Kris._

_Kris held his breath and watched Adam's face, the focus and care evident as he gently shaved the sensitive skin, then glanced down and needed to force himself to stay still when he saw the engorged cock rising up toward his own. Oh god, Adam was as turned on by this intimacy as he was, the feel of his fingers and--_

_"Your balls are all done." Adam stood up, feeling the cool air of the apartment against his over-heated skin. "I'll get more water to clean you and then do the rest."_

_"Huh?" Kris blinked up at Adam. He felt drunk and dazed. "That was..." It was more than hot, having Adam shave him, it had been..._

_"Stroke yourself for me..." Adam reached down and put Kris' hand back on his cock and gently demonstrated the movement he wanted Kris to use. "That's it. Keep doing it."_

_Erotic. That was what this moment was, Kris decided. He stared intently at Adam, finally able to wait patiently since he realized that time and Adam's focus were seemingly endless. Life was on his side right now. He slowly pumped his cock as Adam returned and knelt before him, taking the washcloth and wiping his skin clean of shaving cream._

_"That's it..." Adam smiled and trailed his fingers along the smooth skin. "Let me show you why it's worth it. Don't faint..."_

_"I won't... Ohhhhhhh...." Kris moaned at the feel of Adam's tongue across the curve of his balls. The smooth skin seemed to amplify the textures and the wet heat of Adam's tongue. Kris wiggled closer to Adam's mouth, holding his cock up with his right hand while his left hand clenched on Adam's shoulder. He cried out again as Adam's mouth opened and seemed to.... Ohmigod, he was sucking him. He felt breathless and yet hard as a rock, the combination and the look in Adam's eyes as he stared up at him was... Too much... Not enough. More, more... "Adam, can I, will you let me..."_

_"Not yet..." Adam whispered against Kris' skin, pulling back slightly, only to edge back in, slicking his tongue up Kris' cock. When Kris groaned and thrust his hips forward, Adam squeezed Kris' hip with his hand and Kris stilled instantly. Adam pulled back. Not yet. He didn't want any of this to end._

_"Not done yet?" Kris ended his question by moving forward, then stopping. "Please? Kiss me?" He asked, their mouths meeting an instant later. God, Adam's mouth was soft and demanding at the same time and he could do this forever... Pulling back, Kris saw the plan in Adam's eyes and waited._

_"I want you to open your legs even further..." Adam licked his lower lip as Kris immediately complied and then circled the base of his cock, clearly struggling not to lose control. He looked up into Kris' face and caught the open need and desire and something just as important -- trust. Knowing Kris' past hurts and present fears, Adam understood his openness for the gift it was. This might be the most intimate moment he'd ever had in his life. "No hedgehog now. You're... so open."_

_"For you..." Kris whispered back, then held up a hand to run his fingertips along Adam's ribcage, up over his chest and then touched his lower lip. "I'm yours... You're mine. It's easy to be open with you."_

_"Thank you." Adam took both of Kris' hips in his hand and tilted his body, focusing on each small step to keep from just laying Kris out on this chair and taking him slowly, until the sun came up. "Okay, up like this... That's it. Good... I'm going to shave here too...." Adam rubbed his thumb over the hair-roughened skin behind Kris' balls. "You're going to let me."_

_"You... do whatever you want..." Kris whispered, enthralled by the contrast of the dominating words, intense look, and gentle touch. He fell silent as Adam gently patted shaving cream and then picked up the razor. He relaxed, totally trusting Adam to care for him._

_"See, if I shave you here..." Unable to resist the heat in Kris eyes, Adam bent his head and slowly licked his cock, whispering his intentions, then demonstrating them with his mouth, the words vibrating against the over-heated skin of Kris' body. "Then I can start with a lick to your tip, then all the way down your cock, feeling the boomboomboom of your pulse against my tongue, all the way down to your balls, feeling them pull up against my mouth, tremble against my tongue, then slide lower and lower until--"_

_"Until..." Sliding his hands into Adam's hair, Kris moaned._

_"This is...." Adam paused and bent forward to kiss Kris' upraised thigh, running his mouth down the length of it, then biting it, before laving his tongue over the teeth marks. "The most erotic..."_

_"More than that..." Kris murmured, watching Adam's face and seeing the light in his eyes. This moment was more than erotic, it was loving. Adam was showing him love. How could he do it too? He once again gently threaded his fingers through Adam's soft hair. "I like your hair when it's down like this. I love playing with it."_

_"Even though I'm not glammed up?" Adam pressed the button on the jar of shaving cream and coated his fingers, then the underside of Kris' balls and lower with it._

_Knowing of Adam's insecurities, Kris quickly reminded him, "You know I like you any way you look--" He bit off his words as Adam picked up the razor and surveyed the area._

_"You wouldn't have liked Opie." Adam twisted his mouth in a grimace, as always wondering where he'd be without Mac cosmetics and Inkworks hair coloring, both professionally and personally._

_"I think I would..." Kris gently ran his fingertips down to Adam's eyebrow and smoothed it. "Because my favorite look of yours is the way you look at me after we kiss or after we have sex. The look in your eyes is what's important. And on a shallow basis, honestly? Your eyes are the same and they are the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen."_

_"Thank you. You just... sunk my battleship,"Adam said in a soft voice as he put a hand over his heart. He sighed, smiled and kissed Kris' knee, then rested his cheek on it as he thought. Or felt. Because his heart felt full. He was happy and he knew why. He raised up and bent forward, feeling even more happy when Kris immediately leaned in to meet his lips. "You are... I... Kris... You are... really good for me. Because I believe you. I feel good about myself when I see my reflection in your eyes."_

_"I don't lie." Kris smiled at the blush on Adam's face and his uncharacteristic verbal hesitation, knowing it was a part of him that he was privileged to see._

_Adam nodded. Shaving Kris' balls was so much easier than cutting through to the truth. He really wanted to tell Kris the truth, that he was in love with him, but wanted to find the perfect way, the perfect location, the perfect moment. Was the perfect moment while he was shaving Kris' perineum? Hardly. Wait. Have patience._

_"You're really quiet..." Kris whispered, feeling like he needed to whisper since it was so quiet. Hushed, like... the universe was waiting. Or at least his world which began and ended right here with Adam's touch._

_Adam flicked a glance up and smiled. "I really need to concentrate here, don't I?"_

_"Yeah..." Smoothing his fingers gently into Adam's hair, then dancing them along the freckles on Adam's shoulders, Kris urged, "Hurry up and finish and I'll_ show _you -- and your freckles -- how beautiful I think you are."_

_The most beautiful man he'd even known, Kris knew. Here or there, then or now... Whether naked and free of makeup in the stark overhead light of his sparse apartment, the sharp scent of shaving cream in the air and the light blue walls looking stark without any decoration or trailing glitter, gleaming in the coffeeshop with southern California sunlight streaming in through plate glass windows and the rich smell of coffee, it didn't matter. Adam was always beautiful. He'd fallen for him then and nothing had changed except the depth of his feelings. How could he say it... He ran his hand over Adam's cheek, then back into his hair._

_Knowing he was no doubt grinning like... a man in love, Adam kissed Kris' thigh and bent his head to his task again. Gently scraping the razor along the sensitive skin, then reaching for the washcloth to wipe the area clean, he pondered again how he should tell Kris that he loved him. He'd almost done it a moment ago, but really, this hadn't seemed like _the_ moment, but maybe that was wrong, maybe he really should stop over-thinking and planning and -- _

_"Adam, I love you!" Kris blurted out._

_"Wha--haa--aaa-what?" Adam gurgled, his hand jerking before he stilled it by what he was sure was the most extreme act of self control he'd had to wield since he didn't punch Danny Gokey in the face on a daily basis while having to share a tour bus with him. He pulled the razor away from Kris' balls and stared up into Kris' beaming face. "What?"_

_"I love you."_

_"Wha--aaa--what?" Adam leaned back on his heels, holding the razor out in his right hand and the washcloth in his left. He looked in confusion at them, then back at Kris, wondering why Kris didn't seem to be affected by the buzzing in his ears. "You what?"_

_Kris burst out laughing. "You look like a shaving traffic cop or something."_

_"Well then, stop! You can't tell me something like that while I'm SHAVING YOUR BALLS! With a RAZOR!"_

_Still laughing, Kris reached out and gently curled his hands over Adam's wrists and pushed them towards the floor. "Put down the dangerous objects.... There you go...."_

_"No. Here you go." Adam tossed the razor and washcloth into the bowl, shoved aside the stool and moved forward. His hands grasped Kris' thighs and pulled them around his body as his head descended and took Kris' mouth in a kiss, desperate to get closer and closer still and there, that was the moment, that would be good, but damn it, hurrrrrry... "Lube..."_

_"Adam!" Kris gasped as Adam leaned down to grab the condom. He ripped open the packet, slid it on his cock, then with fingers Kris noticed were trembling slightly, squeezed out some lube._

_"Open your legs for me." Adam bit his lower lip hard as he fought for control as his fingers spread the slick lube around. "Need you now..."_

_"Whatever you need, sweetie..." Kris cried out as Adam's cock brushed against his balls, then down along the valley of his body before pressing against him. "Adamm..."_

_"Hold on, just..." Adam took a deep breath, then lifted his left hand to frame Kris' face and his right hand to help guide himself inside, feeling more free than he had in ...forever. As his cock entered Kris' body, he cried out, "I love you too. I need... I need you to take me in and hold me."_

_"Yessss!" Kris exclaimed as Adam filled him, body and heart, his hardness entering Kris' flesh, his mouth covering Kris' lips and his heartfelt words echoing in Kris' ears and reverberating in his heart, the pounding of his heart echoed by the rhythm of their bodies meeting._

_Their lips clung together, lifting to whisper soft words of great need as their hands caressed and pulled each other closer and closer, their hearts wishing the moment could last forever, even as their bodies took them to this ending, that was just another beginning._

_Resting their heads against each other's shoulders, holding on tightly, they both sighed. Adam kissed Kris' shoulder, then said, "I did not complete my task."_

_"Huh?" Kris turned his head and slowly kissed Adam's neck, kissing his way up to Adam's jaw, nipping at it. "I feel complete."_

_"Mmm. Good. But I said I'd shave you, suck you, lick you, rim you and fuck you. Didn't rim you."_

_"Mmm. Later." Kris sighed and nestled back into Adam's embrace. He began to laugh. "You said you loved me. While sliding into me. It was... perfect."_

_"Was it? I was debating about how to tell you."_

_"Were you trying to come up with some grand scheme?"_

_"Yeah. I was deciding on geocaching. I was going to put a note in a box somewhere and then make you find it."_

_"Oh, that would've been fun, but..." Kris grinned. "The look on your face -- when I told you myself -- was awesome." He laughed. "Ha. I shocked you for once."_

_"Mr. Thirty-eight Cents, you've been shocking me since you turned around in Starbucks." Adam smiled and kissed Kris, taking his time to gently kiss his lips, then slowly delve inside, exploring and then claiming, just as they had done throughout their relationship._

_Slowly opening his eyes after a long kiss that both satisfied and made him want to start all over again, Kris sighed as Adam finally slipped from his body. "And the way you told me?" He grinned as he remembered Adam's rush and then the rush of desire as he'd thrust inside him and said the words Kris needed to hear. At the same time. "Great timing as always, Lambert."_

_"The great thing is we can do this again...." Adam whispered, starting to stand up as Kris clung to him with tight hands. "I'll be right back."_

_Kris held onto Adam's hand. "I love you. I do."_

_"I know. I believe you," Adam told him since Kris seemed to need him to say it. "I love you too." Adam lifted Kris' hand to his mouth and kissed the palm. "Hold on to it."_

_"Oh. You saw..." Kris blushed. Although why he was blushing. He had opened himself up in every possible way, every possible way that was important and now he was  
embarrassed that Adam had noticed that when he kissed Kris' palm that Kris closed his hand over it, like a kid? "Oh, it doesn't matter. You see me clearly anyway."_

_"I do. As you see me. It works out that way." Adam smiled and pulled his hand free. "I'll be right back. Why don't you clean up and dump the bowls."_

_"Oh, sure." Kris agreed and jumped to his feet, swearing, then laughing when his knees wobbled. He steadied himself against the chair, then picked up the bowls, before washing up._

_Stretching in the doorway of the bathroom, Adam watched as Kris washed himself, then hurried forward to wrap his arms around him from behind. He had finally found the right person and he wasn't letting go. "I've got you now."_

_"Adam, you had me from the moment you shoved my money back in my pocket." Kris laughed and held onto Adam's hands as they held him close._

_"Oh?"_

_"Yeah. Adam Fucking Lambert's hand was that close to my cock-- no way, was I stopping until it was on my cock." Kris grinned as Adam laughed. "Speaking of which, you said we could do that again and I believe you owe me." He pushed Adam back out of the kitchen._

_Kris shoved Adam down in the chair, surprised at Adam's ease in allowing him to do so, then immediately climbed into his lap. He sighed contentedly and kissed Adam's shoulder, then his chest, before moving up to his neck, murmuring all the while. "Love you, love your freckles..."_

_"Love you too..." Adam whispered back, looking down at Kris. Gorgeous. His boyfriend, his lover, was gorgeous, even with orange mushrooms behind his head."You have a futon now," Adam reminded Kris, even as he wrapped his arms around Kris and hugged him tightly. "We could move."_

_"I like my chair. It forces us to sit close." Kris kissed Adam's shoulder, then wiggled in his lap._

_"Like I have to be forced to sit close to you, wiggle worm?" Adam laughed out of sheer happiness, then tilted Kris' face up as their lips met in an eager kiss._

_"Love you. I can't believe..." Kris laughed again and stared up into Adam's eyes, so full of happiness, light and love. Directed at him. Absofrickinlutely unbelievable. "Life is so weird."_

_"I know, I know. All this..." Adam once again hugged Kris to him. "All this from thirty-eight cents in Starbucks."_

_"I hope I never get Alzheimer's..." Kris said absently, tracing the arch of Adam's eyebrow, the straight line of his nose, then the curve of his lips._

_"What? Why?" Adam turned his head and kissed Kris' palm, watching him once again capture the kiss. "Love you..."_

_"Because I wanta remember this moment until the day I die. I want to remember the way you were touching me, the feeling... between us while you were shaving me -- it was something... so intimate. Like a.. promise, you know?" Kris waited and when Adam nodded, he continued, "The look on your face, the feel of you sliding into my body... I'm going to write a song, to remember it by. I am." Kris nodded and then grinned. "And I'm gonna call it Love Among the Mushrooms."_

_"Kris...." Adam whispered. "I--" He looked down and laughed. "I can't believe we had this moment in the world's ugliest chair." He sighed. He was never going to be able to get Kris to dump this chair now._

_"I'm never getting rid of this chair, you know. Not now." Kris touched a particularly ugly mushroom near Adam's head. "It's perfect in my eyes. So I'm keeping it."_

__

 

"I'm keeping you. I'm not going to throw you away," Adam repeated, feeling Kris' heart pounding against his ribcage as they stood in his living room. "Not going to throw you away. Do you hear me?"


	22. Holding close and laying out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 22: Holding close and laying out**

 

"I'm not going to throw you away," Adam repeated, feeling Kris' heart pounding against his ribcage. "Not going to throw you away. Do you hear me?" 

"I could, I could do something... What if I did something horrible? When would you throw me out?"

"When would I...." Adam shook his head and tightened his hug, wishing he could just wipe away all of Kris' fears. "Okay. Listen to me. I love you, Kris, so I love who you are. So the only reason I'd ever be that angry at you would be for something you'd _do_ \-- and you have control over what you do, right?"

Kris nodded. For better or worse, he made his own choices. He just hoped he'd made the right one.

"So. Let's lay it all out on the table."

"Deal-breakers?" Kris asked. "That's what they're called, right?"

"Exactly. What are yours?" Adam asked. When Kris said nothing, Adam squeezed his arm. "I know you're easy going, but every one has lines in the sand that cannot be crossed."

"Yeah. I guess... Oh, I know! If you cheated on me. Which means -- by the way -- no more kissing Tommy on stage!" Kris frowned as Adam laughed. "I'm serious. I know that's not serious on stage, but still.."

"I haven't done that in two tours, but okay. So even stage gay is cheating for you. Good to know."

"Yeah. Know it." Kris flushed, then looked down at his feet. "So what are yours?"

Smiling at Kris' characteristic two-step of assertiveness followed by shyness, Adam began, "So for me, the only reason I can imagine breaking up with you in the kicking you to the curb sense is if you betrayed me."

"Like how? Like the pics from that asshole or..."

"Yes, like that. By cheating on me or by selling out to the media. But the thing is, our dealbreakers are different from your parents, because theirs were about who you are and our rules are about the consequences of choices we make -- with full knowledge of their potential to harm to others. So do you see that you are in control of your own life? You won't make those choices, so don't worry about it? Okay?" 

"I get it. I have control." 

As Kris bit his bottom lip and looked down at his feet, Adam tilted Kris' chin up to face him while still keeping him in the circle of his arms. "It's okay, Hedgehog. It's okay. I'm not going to throw you out like garbage. I promise." 

"Okay." Kris took a deep breath and inhaled Adam's scent and felt his warmth enclosing him. It would be fine. As long as Adam was willing to hold him close, it would be better than fine. It would be awesome.

"Well, I know it's not okay, because you just don't just..." Adam made a fist and then exploded his fingers, "POOF! get over something like that."

"Like you and your body issues."

"Exactly. You can tell yourself over and over, but there's still that little fear inside that..."

"That's how Anakin Skywalker turned into Darth Vader. From the fear."

"Okaaaaaaay." Adam bit his lip to keep from laughing, then lost it when he heard the sound of Lane choking back giggles in the hallway. Kris was so damn random. He lowered his voice to whisper. "Now, think about it. You let me put a razor on your balls. You trust me. It's the people in your past you don't trust. And maybe yourself for putting too much trust in them."

"Oh, yeah. Just like you had doubts not so much about me, but about your own judgment."

"Exactly." 

Kris rested his forehead against Adam's chest. "You know... when you were shaving me that night... I felt... Aside from everything else. I felt... confident. I could be submissive--"

Adam laughed. "Here and there."

"Whatever. I could do that because I trusted you. And I could expose myself that way... yeah, I musta felt confident then." 

"Because you were trusting..." Adam brushed his fingertips along Kris' cheek. "I know. You need lessons in trust. I think... Hmm. I think the next time I shave you, I'll tie you down."

"I..." Kris hissed out a long breath as the images slammed into his mind and hardened his dick. "I could get into that." 

"You are the kinkiest person." Adam shook his head. "I should write a song about a small town boy who seems to be baseball and apple pie, but underneath is into shaved balls and fruit-flavored come."

Kris gasped, laughed, then protested, "It was your idea!" 

"Yeah and speaking of ideas. _Lane!_ " Adam called out.

"You rang?" Lane peered around the door.

"I totally need to get a bell."

"I totally would shove that up your --" 

"Hey! As fun as you two are, can we remember this is all about meeeeeeeeee?" Kris whined, looking up from Adam to Lane with an exaggerated pout.

Lane smiled in Adam's direction and took the steps necessary to reach Kris, then reached out and hugged him. "How do you resist that face?"

"I don't." Adam hugged Kris. "Let's get back on track."

"Why _is_ Lane here?" Kris asked.

"I'm here as the check and balance."

"So, what, you're the judicial branch or something?"

"Or something. I'm here in case Adam -- and I know this may shock you --" Lane grinned. " Pushes too much. He does not always excel in knowing when to... how shall I say this..."

"Shut up?" Adam supplied. "And I do mean that in a nice way." 

Kris grinned and rocked back and forth from heel to toe and back again. It was so funny when Adam and Lane got going. Then again... He stopped rocking. "But, Lane -- you agree with him about.. whatever it is he's about to push me about, don't you?"

"Yes." Lane nodded. "Listen, Kris. We've heard through Jacob that the paps are sniffing around. They've followed Adam and noticed him on your street several times."

Nodding, Kris looked at Adam. "Right. That's why you didn't come over the last two nights."

Adam sighed loudly. "Right. Which is putting a crimp in my reason for living."

"That kind of flattery will get you anywhere you want," Lane surmised by the happiness on Kris' face at Adam's words.

"The greater problem," Adam continued. "Is that they've also noticed your truck coming into my gates."

Kris smirked. "Well, when that happens, I hope no one's takin' pictures, because it's been a while and my form might not be too good."

Lane gaped at Kris, then giggled. Adam rolled his eyes. "Anywaaaaaaay, Kristopher. Jacob has warned me that the time is drawing nigh when --"

"Drawing nigh? Is this a Dickens novel?" Lane interjected.

Adam took a deep breath and counted to ten. When Lane and Kris got together, they got each other going. "No. It's our life. As amusing as its been to distract the paps with Sutan and his friends... I think the time is rapidly approaching when you're going to be outed as my boyfriend. I had a meeting with Jacob and Geoffrey to talk about a plan."

"Okaaay." Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "What's the big deal?"

"It means that the world will know you're gay. And that you''re my boyfriend. Two separate issues which will be conflated into one and the media will be all over it. Remember when you changed your phone number because -- you said -- you didn't want them to contact you because you were dating someone famous. We're concerned about you--"

"I'm not a wimp. I'm not gonna fold. I can handle it," Kris protested.

"That's not the problem. I'm not doubting your toughness," Adam said softly, knowing Kris would be touchy about it. 

"Well, actually I can see why you would, given how I ran away from Conway," Kris acknowledged. "That wasn't exactly tough guy material."

"We're more concerned," Lane interjected. "About you being outed like that, given the fact that you haven't made any attempt at getting in touch with people back in Gopher Flats."

Adam explained, "It seems to us as though if you had reconciliation or closure that might be helpful when the shit hits the fan."

"So it _is_ about me not being tough enough to call them. Holy shit, I do need to man up, don't I?" Kris frowned.

Lane shook her head. "Listen, I've been there. I get it. We understand your hesitation, but the press on this development is going to be tremendous. Remember the press when Adam got screwed over the last two times?"

Adam shook his head. "It's not going to be _that_ bad, Laney. The press was all over that because it was bad news. Rubbernecking at a gruesome accident appears to be their raison d'etre."

"Agreed. But any time you've dated, there is news." Lane paused, then said gently, "This time it will be a heavier news cycle, because all of the stories will be framed with the question about whether you've managed to pick a decent guy this time."

Kris gaped. "Oh hell. That was one reason for the background check, the home visit. Y'all knew..." He frowned. "Damn it." Poor Adam. Everyone else got to make their stupid dating mistakes in private. It infuriated him that Adam had been as hurt by the media and the public ridicule as by having his heart tramped upon. 

Adam and Lane looked at each other, seeing the anger in Kris' face. Adam asked, "Are you sure you're not still mad about the background checks?"

Kris took a deep breath. "No. Again, no. I mean, when I interviewed with Brush, he kept asking me about skeletons. Kept saying how they didn't want to invest in someone only to find out they had something in their background that would make the investment useless or embarrass the company. And Hannah told me..."

"Okaaaaaay..." Adam nodded as Kris continued babbling while playing with Adam's rings. He'd be better off asking Geoffrey to see his videotapes than trying to make sense of this convoluted story. Kris must need more coffee, Adam decided. Or maybe he did. When Kris finally wound down, Adam tried again. "Let's go into the kitchen and have some coffee."

""Oh, that is a good idea!" Lane agreed and led the way. As Adam pulled down cups, Kris grabbed the glass pot from the coffeemaker. Lane grinned as she watched the two men pour coffee. "You know, the last time all three of us were in this kitchen in the morning, Adam was wearing only a dish towel."

Kris grinned, then sighed. "And I had had my first freak out. God, I'm..."

"Stop talking negatively about yourself," Adam ordered. "And speaking of that morning -- you know, it it's still okay for you to be angry that I went behind your back to do the background checks." 

"I already explained, but... " Kris stopped. "Oh. Hey. Even if I was mad, as a Christian, I'm called to forgive."

"Oh. I won't argue with that," Adam agreed. 

"Call the Vatican! It's a miracle!" Lane grinned. 

"It will be a miracle if we get through this before I die of hunger," Kris complained. "C'mon, I'll make breakfast like I planned." He pulled out pans, while Adam opened the refrigerator and began handing out eggs, butter, cheese, vegetables and fruit. He didn't know what Kris had planned, so it was easy to lay it all out on the counter. Speaking of which, he should get another stool for Kris here.

"You know...." Lane said. "It seems like every time I'm in the kitchen, Adam's hiding in the refrigerator. And dealing with shrinkage." 

Hearing Lane snicker, Adam peered over the refrigerator door. "You know, I could stuff you in here..." 

"He's such a ferocious beast." Lane snickered again. 

"He could be, I bet," Kris said with a speculative glance at Adam. "Aren't you the one who told me to avoid making him really mad because he turns into the Hulk?"

"The Hulk?" Adam grimaced. "Couldn't I have been a superhero with some awesome body."

Kris grinned and bumped Adam with his hip. "You're my superhero with an awesome body."

"Awww..." Adam and Lane said in unison. 

Lane smiled at Adam, who was blushing. "And Kris calls you, Sweetie? Seems like it should be the other way around."

"Speaking of which, Adam -- can you cut up the fruit, please?" Kris asked, pointing at the the cutting board. "I know you can handle that."

Lane tilted her head. "Why is it every time I see you two, you're urging Adam to eat more fruit?"

Adam and Kris looked at each other and burst out laughing. Adam plucked a strawberry from the container and popped it in his mouth, while Kris avoided looking at him. 

"Oh, c'mon. How can fruit be dirty?" Lane rolled her eyes. "No way. You just don't want to tell me." 

"Nope." Kris shook his head as he turned the heat on the stove. "So fill me in--"

"That's my job, not Lane's." Adam smirked.

Kris laughed and Lane giggled. 

"Speaking of which..." Adam began. "I want to maintain some semblance of control over the situation."

"You always do. I mean you were just talking about tying me down," Kris said absently as he cracked eggs into a bowl. He looked up as Lane snickered and smiled, while pulling the peppers and mushrooms toward her and began cutting them. 

"No. I mean about the press and revealing that you're my boyfriend. If possible, I'd like to give us control over that."

"That sounds like a good idea," Kris agreed slowly, watching Lane nod. "But... Okay. So what's your plan?"

"Lane and I think before the world knows you're my boyfriend, you might want to talk to your friends back home." 

Kris bristled and beat the eggs with a stronger flourish than necessary. Adam had said he wouldn't bug him any more about this -- he should've known Adam couldn't let it go. The man didn't know the meaning of let it go. "This is just your way of trying to get me to make that phone call!"

"I also think it's in your best interests to make those calls now. Before..." Adam spread his hands out. "Before they know you have connections or a boyfriend with money. This way, you'll _know_ where you stand."

Kris opened his mouth, then shut it. He scuffed his sneaker on the floor and then began kicking at the tiled floor. "Shit! I hate to admit it, but you're right." When Adam said nothing, Kris looked up. Seeing the light in Adam's eyes, Kris began laughing. "It's totally killing you not to say, 'I'm always right.' Isn't it?"

Adam shook his head and watched Kris begin to cook. "I need to bask in those moments, because -- let's be honest -- I've had probably more moments when I was woefully wrong." 

"So... you want me to call Cale -- to start?"

"Yes." Lane nodded and looked longingly at the frying pan on the counter. Sometimes the apparent need to bash Kris over the head with something was overwhelming. She loved the guy, she really did, but bloody hell. "He's a sure thing. Will you watch the video of him now or after breakfast?" 

"Seriously?" Kris asked, swallowing.

"Yes, now or after breakfast. It's like getting a vaccination when you were a kid-- just do it and get it over with," Lane urged. "And... besides. I told him you'd call this morning."

"You what?" Kris gaped at Lane, then began laughing. "Ohmigod, you're just as bossy as he is."

"And she does it without a stool."

Lane blinked in confusion at Adam, then shook herself. "I don't even want to know. If I don't know, I can never tell." 

Adam rolled his eyes. "That's her whole philosophy. Don't know, don't tell." 

"Worked so far! I know nothing about stools or fruit or deflating beds or..." Lane shook her head. "Whatever other weird kinks you two have. Now, the video --" Lane pointed toward the computer on the kitchen island and then added, "Kris, I actually hope you're doing this because you want to, not because Adam and I are the bossiest bitches in the world."

Kris shook his head. "Truth is, you're not even the bossiest bitches in Conway. You met Pearline." When Lane groaned, Kris nodded. "She bosses people into shopping at her store by convincing them they're gonna go to hell otherwise. That and they're scared of the snakes. Truth is..." He pushed his plate away. "I'm sorta grateful you two did this. I know you told me that at least some of my friends would still want to be in touch and I should call them, but I guess I...." He looked down, then forced himself to look back up. "I might not have had the guts to contact them. I was afraid of being rejected."

"Who isn't? I think you would have contacted them. You just needed time to process it and work your way up to it." Adam paused. "Me, being bossy, decided you'd had enough time and needed to just do it."

"Well, you were right. I was avoiding dealing with it. Or taking too long to process. What I need to work on is that." Kris waited for Adam to answer, but when he looked confused, Kris took a breath and continued. "I need to work on needing to work my way up to things. I need to stop being afraid of rejection and needing time to get used to an idea and just dive in. You know? 'Cause sometimes you just have to dive in or you'll miss stuff."

"Agreed. I almost made that mistake myself. So we can work on it together. We need to watch Ferris Bueller's Day Off." 

"I guess first I have to watch Cale's video though." Kris eyed the computer, square his shoulders and folded his omelette. "And then I will call him and talk to him. Speaking of talking... so are you gonna give Leno the first crack at the story? He was nice to you, to us. He scratched your back, you scratch his -- that's how it works here? Well, anywhere, right?"

"Well, I'm sure not giving Perez first crack." 

"God, no! I wouldn't ask you to. Or want you to." Kris shuddered as he began dishing out the food. "And I'm sure as hell not asking to walk the red carpet with you..."

"Would you, though?" Adam asked.

Thinking for a moment, Kris realized that walking a red carpet and seeing flashbulbs going off in his face was inevitable if he was with Adam. And he did want to be with him. So, man up. "If you wanted me to, I would."

"Fair enough." Adam nodded. "Because that's probably going to happen. Soon." 

"But...." Kris gulped. "I don't have anything to wear!"

"We can go shopping!" Adam said eagerly as they all sat down and began eating. "I'll pick an outfit out for you!"

"Ooooh, boy..." Kris groaned as Adam and Lane carried on a long, far too long conversation about dressing him in which his participation was apparently totally unnecessary. "I'm just a Ken doll to you, aren't I!"

"Hell no, boy. You're anatomically correct." Adam glanced down at Kris' lap.

Feeling himself begin to harden automatically just from Adam's look, Kris laughed and implored, "Stop it!" 

"Plus he doesn't have helmet hair," Lane noted, rubbing Kris' hair as she stood up. "Speaking of which, are you going to have your stylist do his hair that night?"

As they began to clear the table and talk about hair, Kris looked from one to the other. "Wait. You already figured this out, didn't you?"

"Who, me?" Adam scoffed as he turned on the garbage disposal. 

**_GRrrrinddd_ **

Kris looked at Lane. "He has a point by point plan mapped out, doesn't he?"

"I know nothing." Lane held her breath while Kris walked over to the kitchen island and stood in front of the computer.

"Here goes nothing..." Kris mumbled as he pressed the play icon on the video. 

 

"Well?" Lane asked, as she and Adam walked into the living room to give Kris privacy to watch the video after they'd finished eating.

"Don't you think it's weird that he hasn't exploded about the background check?"

"Not really," Lane said slowly. "The overall impression I got from Conway was that Conway Kris was so easygoing he was... how did one of his friends put it? He was so easygoing he was no-going at times." Which, Lane thought, explained Kris' self-criticism that he needed to learn to dive in. 

"He's not that easygoing now, though," Adam pointed out. "He stands up for himself. He argues. He's stubborn. Honestly, I think he's more stubborn than I am sometimes."

"True. But... I think that's partly because the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune--" 

"Hamlet." Adam grinned.

"Or the tv show, Slings and Arrows. Which -- I KNOW -- is based on Hamlet. But my point is that maybe having to make it on his own with no net, no back up plan, no support -- that made him more aggressive. But his default is super easygoing, based on what the gang at Sam Drucker's general store in Petticoat Junction says."

"You watch way too much TV Land tv. Do you think.. Maybe that talk we had right beforehand made him feel secure enough that he went back to his original default?" Adam mused. He rubbed the back of his neck. "Maybe.. I don't know. It's just..."

"You're over-thinking it!" Lane exclaimed, then pointed at Adam. 'I know. I think Neil is making you paranoid."

"I think Neil is making me _an_ noyed."

"I think you need to let him go. You'd be doing him a favor, if you ask me."

"You sound like Geoffrey. He thinks the problem is that Neil resents being dependent upon me."

"Geoffrey has a problem with any sort of dependency."

"Yeah, because...." Adam looked off in the direction of the living room from which they could hear the faint sound of Cale's voice on the video and rolled his eyes. "Not that we have to worry about that with Kris. He's rabid about working on the fan mail to pay me back for the loan and still won't wear the tee-shirts I bought for him."

"You mean the tee-shirts I bought."

"You bought one tee-shirt, I bought two. Therefore -- " 

"My god, you are the most argumentative..." Lane paused and considered that given Adam's history, it wasn't a bad idea for Kris to be OCD about paying back a loan and avoiding using gifts. "Hold on. What did Jacob and Geoffrey say about your plan? Or... Wait. Listen." She stopped talking and they both listened, hearing Kris dial his phone. "I think he's actually making the call. Oh god." She reached out and squeezed Adam's hand tightly. 

 

 

"Hi, Cale? It's Kris. Kris Allen--"

"It's _you_!" Cale exclaimed. Relief sped through his body. "I thought you were dead, dude. I really did and then that woman showed up in town--"

"No, not dead. Just gone."

"But why'd you leave without a word to anyone? Ever?"

Kris licked his lower lip nervously, then said slowly, hearing the hoarseness of his voice, "You got to know about what happened with my parents and the pre-school."

"Yeah and what does that have to do with _me_? Did you think I was an asshole too? I mean, I knew you were gay and--"

"You knew? Why the hell didn't you say anything?" Kris nearly yelled the words. All that anxiety and fretting and okay, if he was honest, fear and Cale had _known?_

Cale froze. Had Kris Allen actually yelled about something other than a ball game? What the hell? "Why didn't _you_ say anything? It was your life. I figured you'd tell me when you wanted to. Which was stupid, since I also thought you'd call me at some point after you left. Did you ever check your voice mail -- because I called you when it eventually occurred to me that you weren't calling me. Dweeb." 

Kris groaned. "I...I didn't check. I just... And then my phone plan only saved the unlistened voice mail for thirty days... Ugh. I... I was pretty messed up. I just assumed everyone hated me."

"You know what happens when you assume--"

"What, are you in sixth grade again?" Kris smiled in relief. This was going okay. And it might have gone okay two years ago if he'd had less fear. "Well. After I left Conway... I guess I kinda fell into a pit. It took me a while -- maybe until the last few months to climb back out."

"So... what happened? Or is that all you want to say?"

"I... just got in my truck and drove west. I don't even remember the trip, to be honest. I couldn't tell you where I stopped or how I even got here. Somehow... I stopped in LA and tried to make it in music, which is way harder than you can imagine. Did a lot of shit jobs and... got kinda lost."

"But now you're found, right? That's how come Lane came out here and you're calling? You found yourself again? You're doing good, sounds like."

"Yeah. I had some good luck and got my head back on straight. Made some choices, took some risks that paid off..." Kris bit his lip. Not even to Cale would he admit that he had been homeless and done... other stuff. "But before... after my parents... And even now, Lane says my father still.... He hates me, I guess."

"Whoa. Kris, hey... " Cale thought for a long moment, deciding how to say something he regretted not saying years before. "You know what? I'm just gonna say it. It's tough, but you just need to face the fact that your father is an asshole and move on."

"Well, gee, thanks, for putting it so clearly."

"Not a problem. What are friends for?" 

Hesitantly, Kris asked, "We're still friends?"

"Grow some balls, buddy. Of course, we're still friends. Or we will be if you invite me out there. Dude, you're in California! In LA! You gotta invite me out there1"

Kris tensed, then relaxed once again. Cale didn't know he was dating Adam Lambert, so he wasn't expecting... Oh hell, this was what Adam and Lane had been talking about. "Sure. Yeah. Come on out. I... It'd be great! I have a crappy apartment, well, not so crappy any more since... well, since the friends of a guy I'm dating helped me redo it, but..."

"A guy you're dating. So you're dating a guy. Well, cool." Cale paused as a thought occurred to him. "Wait. Is this your first real relationship? It is! You never dated girls, not really and before you say anything -- going to prom does not count -- and hey, man, not to beat a dead horse, but why didn't you ever tell me? Because I didn't get it then. I told you everything."

"I..." Kris swallowed hard. Cale had come back to that point again -- it must bug him. "I thought you would reject me."

"I don't know what's more insulting. That you thought I'd reject you or that you never made a pass at me."

"Whaaaaaaat?" Kris spluttered. "I... you...."

"I'm kidding, doofus." Cale grinned. "No need to freak out."

"If I was freaking out, which I wasn't, it was because I thought you'd changed your type from blondes to brunettes."

"Speaking of which, who was the tall blonde chick with the cool accent that was out here? Her name was Lane, right?"

Kris grinned at Cale's deliberately nonchalant tone of voice. "Oh. Lane is my boyfriend's personal assistant."

"Personal Assistant. Who the hell are you dating? Is it some actor? Have you been on the red carpet? Should I be watching Entertainment Tonight?" 

 

_  
"So, Adam, why did you want to talk with us about a red carpet event?" Geoffrey had asked two days ago, leaning back in his swivel chair and grinning. "I'd lay odds that I already know."_

_"Do you?" Adam teased back. "Do tell."_

_"I would bet a substantial sum of money--"_

_"And already has..." Jacob muttered._

_"You did not." Adam turned to Geoffrey and raised an eyebrow._

_"Perhaps." Geoffrey grinned. "I knew you two were going to end up as a couple and if I chose to make a wise... investment in my belief with others of little faith..." He raised his hands and shrugged._

_"Faith is hard to recover," Adam said softly._

_"But you have done so?" Geoffrey pressed._

_"I.. Yes." Adam nodded firmly. "Kris is my boyfriend and I'm happy to say that. I have a lot of hope for my personal life in the future, something I didn't have a few months ago. I'm happy. But more to the point here, I'm not a good keeper of secrets, which Kris knows, so he'll understand that we are going to be a couple publicly. He'll also understand that there's only so long I can keep him hidden."_

_"Does he even care?" Jacob asked. "I mean, the guy knew who you were from the get-go. And from what you all say, he's not an idiot. He had to know what he was getting into."_

_"It's one thing to imagine it, it's another thing to live it," Adam pointed out. "But how to do it is the question. I'm sure he doesn't want to do a couple's interview on E! News or god forbid, with Billy Bush. Nor do I. I think he'd rather avoid answering questions all together, which would be my preference as well, but I know I'll need to give out enough information to keep the hunters at bay. So I want to find the right way to ease him into this fishbowl life."_

_Jacob smiled tightly. "So, to sum up -- you want us to devise a plan to introduce your boy toy to the world with a minimum of fuss?" And for maximum benefit._

_"Boy toy?" Adam snarled. "You will show respect in everything you do in regards to Kris. Or you will not be on my account any more. I'll do whatever I have to do to get rid of you. Are we clear?"_

_"Crystal." Jacob looked down. Wow, this relationship was serious. After a moment, he said, "I think a red carpet event, a small one, here in LA. One where you're not the big draw, but one of several."_

_"That was my thought as well," Adam said quickly. "It seems like that would be a more controlled situation, less traumatic, but with maximum impact. The photographers are on their line and we can always walk away if we want and they can't follow."_

_"Absolutely." Jacob smiled. "We'd be providing the first pictures of you two as a couple in that controlled environment and lessening the odds of a melee as some scum tries to get that scoop."_

_Geoffrey agreed. "Yes. Do the red carpet and pose. Then pose -- actually stop and pose -- for pictures on your way into the after-event parties."_

_Adam nodded. "Sure. That will greatly lessen the value of any paparazzi photographs of us early on and should make the piranhas less inclined to go for blood."_

_"I suppose... we could kiss for the cameras that first night," Adam mused. "That first night. Something planned and innocuous, so the first kiss pic doesn't become the coveted high-fee photo."_

_"Or you could do it on Leno -- he'll probably want to bring Kris out, just for a moment," Geoffrey reminded Adam. "Kris could sit down next to you and you could give a quick peck. You can talk with Kris about it."_

_"Or you could do a story with People and sell the rights to the pics," Jacob suggested. "You two could split the fee."_

_Geoffrey sat up straight and shook his head. "I don't think it's appropriate for Kris to profit financially from his relationship with Adam."_

_"Thank you." Adam twisted his ring. "As for myself? The last time I profited from my personal life was in a courtroom. I'd like to make that the very last time. Although I did donate that money and Kris and I could do it again..."_

 

"So this guy, he's rich? In the music business, connected with Idol, right? Hey -- He's your sugar daddy?" Cale laughed.

"Don't say that shit!" Kris exclaimed. "He doesn't pay for me or--"

"Calm down, cowboy!" Cale interjected, shocked again at Kris' vehemence. "Just joking with you. Wow, you never used to get that het up about stuff."

"I've...changed some, being on my own. Had to, in order to survive, ya know?"

"I get it...." Cale paused, while pondering the notion of an aggressive Kris Allen. Hard to imagine him being that way all the time, maybe... when necessary. Yeah. After a moment, he asked, "So who is he? Some music executive who's afraid of someone stealing -- I bet that's it. That's why she used the Idol excuse. When honest people have to tell lies, they tend to tell lies close to the truth. ..." 

"Or something. So you liked Lane?" Kris asked.

"Sure. Loved the accent. Plus she's tall. And I hear she had a run-in with Pearline over unicorns and didn't run screaming from the store. I can respect that sort of courage."

Kris laughed. "Yeah. Lane got a great video of her."

"You should totally post it on YouTube!"

"Why? So the whole world can know that Conway has crazies?" 

"Yeah, 'cause it's a total shock that a small town in Arkansas has crazies." 

"True. And it's not like there aren't plenty of crazies out here, either." Kris shuddered. "The obsessive fans. The paparazzi. Lemme tell you, it's nothing like Conway."

"Oh, I dunno. Remember some of those MILFs on the football booster club? They were obsesssive too. The cheerleaders who sabotaged each other. And the guys reliving their glory days at the baseball games..."'

"You're right. Like Adam said, people are pretty much the same all over." Kris bit his lip. He'd already blown it. Hopefully, Cale wouldn't pick up on it. Then again... he could trust Cale -- that was a truth he should have seen clearly, but instead had let fear cloud his vision. A life lesson.

"So... would you ever come back here?"

"It's not going to be the parable of the Prodigal Son, is it, Cale?"

"Not with your dad, no," Cale said firmly. Kris had to face the reality about his father. Sometimes you just had to know when to fold your hand of cards and push away from the table. 

"So would I come back there? To live? Never." Kris shook his head emphatically even though his friend couldn't see it. "I'm done hiding who I am. I live here now where I can be myself. The self I'm making, anyway. This is where I belong now. You should... You should come out and see me, visit LA some time." 

"That would be so cool. I'd love to get to the beach. Go to Universal, do the whole California tourist thing."

"We could do that. Universal is fun." Kris grinned. 

"You know, Jason at the Piggly Wiggly said he could've sworn he saw you for a second on Jay Leno when he does that Jaywalking bit at Universal on the Tonight Show."

"Did he? I'm pretty common-looking." Kris bit back laughter. "Hey, we could get tickets to the Tonight Show. Or maybe go to a concert or two."

"Maybe that Lane could go with us."

"Oooh-hoooo!" Kris cackled. "I see your plan. It's not to spend time with me."

"Well, I mean if you're going to be with your boyfriend when we do stuff, I'd like a date. So I wouldn't be a third wheel and all." 

"Oh, of course. But we also have plenty of male friends. I'm sure I can ask one of them to hang out so you wouldn't be third wheeling it."

"Asshole." Cale laughed. 

"Well, if you think I"m gonna set Lane up with you so you can boink her and leave her, fuggaboutit," Kris grumbled. "She's... like a sister to me. So no way--"

"A sister, huh?" Cale nodded. That was good. Kris might be quiet, but he was a social guy, needed people. "So you're making your own family out there?"

"Yeah, I guess I am." Kris nodded. He was going to make that yam recipe for Adam's mom for Thanksgiving. Yup, he was. 

"That's good news. So do you have any more hot sisters? Oh my god -- I bet you do! Girls love gay guys, don't they? You're gonna be like the best wing man ever!"

Kris burst out laughing. He should have known Cale would be cool. That was what fear did -- it made you see monsters that didn't exist. "So it's an advantage?

"Totally!"

Sighing, Kris said ruefully, "I totally should've called you before."

"No shit. So why now?" Cale asked, then shook his head. Kris was a smart dude, but he did take forever to make decisions. 

"My... uh boyfriend and Lane twisted my arm."

"Figures. So I'm gonna meet this boyfriend when I come out there?"

"I need to tell you who my boyfriend is before you... uh... read about it or see it on tv. But don't tell anyone else yet. Promise. You gotta promise me. I need to call some more people back there, but I don't want them to know yet. Promise."

"Pinky swear and piss in the same spot promise. Tell me!" 

"His name is Adam--"

"Huh? Who the hell you dating? Adam Fucking Lambert?" Cale hooted. "Ha. You always did have the hots for that guy, didn't you? I remember when you went up north and saw him in concert -- you talked about him for weeks. That was when I knew for sure."

"You... really knew?" Kris asked, hoping to deflect while he decided if he should tell the truth. His gut was telling him to trust Cale. 

"I wondered, bro. You never saw what the big deal was about boobs and never seemed interested in girls. But you did talk about Adam Lambert a lot, especially after you saw him in concert. Like, _all_ the time. Like someone with a crush. And being the math whiz I am, I put two and two together." 

Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "I...uh... talk about him more now. Since.. that is who I'm dating."

"What? No way!"

"Way. I'm dating Adam Fucking Lambert."

"NO WAY!" Cale yelled. "Damn it, bro. You go from the closet to dating him?"

"Frying pan, meet fire? Yeah, that's me." 

 

Adam looked at Lane. "Frying pan? Fire? Next year's Halloween costumes. Done."

"Shhh!" Lane hissed.

Kris rolled his eyes and called out. "I know you're already thinking of how to do the makeup to look like fire, Adam!"

"Busted." Adam grinned.

"Why don't you just come in and sit down?" Kris offered. "Make yourself comfortable while you eavesdrop? Too bad you don't have a comfy chair to do it! Ha! Bet you're missing my mushrooms now!"

"You know, there's a song in that!" Adam laughed, then began to sing, "Eavesdropping, dropping, dropping, eavesdropping... Missing mushrooms, m-m-m-missing 'shrooms..." 

Cale's mouth dropped open. . "Hoo-shit, that really was him. You really are dating him. How? How did you meet him?"

"It's... unbelievable," Kris agreed.

"This whole thing is unbelievable. Did you meet him at a concert or at a label? Did you play guitar for one of his songs or did you meet in a gay bar or--"

"No, no... We met in a coffee shop. Starbucks."

"You're kidding. C'mon, who are you really dating and where did you meet him? Is it some double-bagger?"

Kris cracked up as he looked at Adam, who was lurking in the doorway with Lane. "No. Seriously, we met in Starbucks."

"You got picked up by Adam Lambert in a Starbucks?' Cale asked incredulously. 

"Well, actually I asked him out."

"You? You, Kris Allen? Asked anyone out?" Cale spluttered, even more shocked. 

"I told you -- I've had to get more aggressive being on my own, out here."

"Well, I can see that. But still, you went from Kris Allen -- so laid back half the town thought he was a stoner -- to picking up a guy, any guy? Let alone Adam Fucking Lambert? In a Starbucks?"

"Told you it was unbelievable. And half the town thought I was a stoner?" Kris groaned. Nope, he was never going back to Conway. 

"Naw, just teasing. Most everyone's mom thought you were a sweet boy." Cale paused and grinned. "After you left, someone made a comment about you might be a stoner -- well, I told them you were just super laid back. I think most everyone believed me. Except Pearline -- I think she had an extra snake service in your honor." 

"I fucking hate gossip!"

"I don't blame you," Cale agreed. "But you and Adam Lambert? You asked him out?"

"Yes! I mean, no way was I letting that opportunity pass me by. No fucking way. And really..." Kris thought a moment and realized he needed to remember this notion. "What did I have to lose? Just a few seconds of embarrassment if he turned me down? But he didn't and I've had months of... the best time of my life. No risk, no reward, right?"

"I don't believe it. I need a picture." 

"I'll send you one later. Or..." Kris shrugged. "You can wait for the pictures to come out --" Kris broke off as Cale burst out laughing. "Hey, get your mind outta the gutter. Not those kind of pictures. Apparently Adam and his pr team will have a plan to introduce me as the boyfriend."

"Huh. Kinda like walking through the arch for the promenade at senior prom?"

"Yeah. Sure. Just like that," Kris scoffed. He relaxed back into the couch cushions and beckoned Adam and Lane forward. The call had been hard to make, but worthwhile. He knew not every call would go that well, but he wasn't going to dwell on it. He'd learned the lesson about focusing on the positive. Speaking of which...

 

"So..." Adam smiled as Kris put down his phone.

"So...you were right. It was good." Kris grinned and threw himself at Adam. He hugged him tightly and kissed his neck. "Thanks for pushing me."

"It's always my pleasure to push you." Adam smiled back, while rubbing his hands up and down Kris' back, before Kris pulled back to grab Lane in a hug so tight her eyes bulged. Adam smiled. Kris was becoming more effusive every day. "And now...let's go shopping for some clothes for you for the red carpet." 

"Shopping? For the red carpet? We have to go shopping? Laaaaaaane..." Kris whined. "Save me!"

"Nope. I'm going too." Lane tapped Kris on the shoulder. "I have some ideas about dressing you too. Adam and I can debate."

Kris gulped. "I think maybe I'd rather call Pearline." 

Adam grinned. "Oooh, snakes. You know... we could do a whole theme!" He decided he could use that imagery. "Snakeskin boots and I could change the streak in my hair to blue...Or maybe I could use that in a music video or..."


	23. Taken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks  
> Rating: R

**Chapter 23.: Messes and make up  
Rating: R**

 

"I think you should wear something other than black," Kris said as he looked around the boutique and tried to pretend that he belonged here. The last shirt Adam had picked up had cost more than the rent on his apartment, but that wasn't the point, because he already had resigned himself to the fact that if Adam wanted to buy him clothes for a red carpet event, he should just wear them. As Adam had pointed out, the red carpet was work, not pleasure. But... "If you're gonna pick out my clothes, I should get a say on your clothes. And what I say is that it's just not right that you're gonna wear black to a holiday concert. It's a Jingle Ball. Wear some color. Wouldn't that be truly shocking?" 

"What?" Adam and Lane echoed together.

"I...wow." Kris grinned. "You both look like I suggested he wear plaid on stage--"

"Ohmigod...." Adam moaned, hoping he sounded as though he were in deep distress. "The idea... I need to sit down."

"Oh, stop it. You've never been that precious in your life." Kris elbowed Adam, then pointed at the short wall rack of shirts in the exclusive boutique."Those shirts are shiny. You like shiny stuff."

Adam glared at Kris. " _Really,_ Kris? I'm not a magpie. Or a raccoon. Really."

"Really, Adam?" Lane grinned. "Sometimes your eyeliner--"

Kris chuckled at the look of disdain Adam sent Lane's way. He pointed at the blue shirt, which would, in his opinion, bring out Adam's eyes. He'd endured all sorts of discussion about colors and his eyes and hair, which were -- as he'd pointed out -- brown, just brown, so how much discussion could there be, which had been an apparently stupid question since Lane and Adam had _looked_ at each other and kept pulling clothes. But he liked this blue shirt. Blue was good. "What about blue? Hannukah wrapping paper is blue." 

"How do you know that?" Adam asked quickly. "Kris, I hope you didn't buy me anything, it's not necessary."

Kris shrugged. "The only things necessary in life are food, water, and shelter, but---"

"What about clothing?"

"It's optional for you. Because the world would be a more beautiful place if you were naked more often." Kris grinned up at Adam, watching his eyes alight at the compliment. Adam was the most complex person Kris had ever met, but in many ways his needs were just as simple as Kris' own. Everyone needed to be loved and to feel special. "But something else that's necessary even though it's not a thing is for me to show you how much I appreciate you. So, yeah, I got you a gift. And you're gonna do like your mama taught you and accept it nicely." 

"I thought I was the bossy one. Humph!" Adam crossed his arms.

Kris put his hands on Adam's forearms and leaned into him. "It's rubbing off on me."

"Speaking of rubbing one out..." Adam leered. "You do remember that I couldn't visit you for the last two nights, don't you?"

Lane rolled her eyes. "Blue clothes, Adam, not blue balls, okay?"

Adam winked at Kris. "Well, Kris and I could go into the fitting room and solve both problems. That would be time efficient. Because, believe me, after two days and spending the last two hours watching Kris change, it wouldn't take long and --"

Lane examined her nails and said in a bored tone, "Don't make me call your mother." 

Kris grinned. "And..... she shoots, she scores. Game over." 

Sniffing, Adam glared at Lane. "Using the mom play is cheating, Lane." 

"All's fair in love and shopping. The shirt?" Lane prompted.

"Oh yeah." Kris nodded. "So a blue shirt. Why would that be so terrible to wear to a Jingle Ball? You're Jewish so obviously you're not gonna wear a reindeer sweater, or an elf costume, or red and green--"

"Kris would make a cute elf, though, wouldn't he, Lane?" Adam mused. "The tights..."

"I'm not gonna..." Kris hissed out a breath. Adam was in a mood. "You're _not_ distracting me. How about something, you know, a little more festive? A nice bright blue?"

 

"That is the sparkliest Hanukah paper I've ever seen!" Dani laughed as she finished the last bit of taping and stood back. "Adam will love it." She giggled. "He'll love all of it."

"Hope so..." Kris looked down at the dreidel motif paper, then back up and grinned. "Thanks, Dani. I couldn't have done this without you." 

"What are friends for?" Dani shrugged, then taking a long look at Adam's Hanukah gift, giggled again. "Wait. My phone, I need to take pictures--"

"No!" Kris laughed, tried to lunge and nearly fell over. 

"Oh yeah....." Dani grinned as she held up her phone and began clicking away.

"You are an evil bitch!" Kris laughed.

"Be nice or I'll sell these to a tabloid!" Dani teased. She continued laughing all the way out the door. 

Adam did a double take as he drove down Kris' street in Lane's car. That had looked like Dani's car. Neither she nor Kris had mentioned doing anything together while he brought Lane to LAX and then took her car to use as a pap diversion device while she went to Vegas with some old friends from Idol. Oh well, whatever. Kris was probably concocting some Hanukah surprise, given the way he'd been so insistent that Adam come over for the first night. 

"Use your key!" Kris called out, turning around to face the door at Adam's knock.

"What... why is it so dark?" Adam walked into Kris' dark apartment and blinked in surprise as he saw one candle lit on a... menorah? 

"Happy Hanukah!" Kris called out. 

**Bang**

Slamming the door behind him, Adam took a step inside, peering into the darkness, trying to see Kris. "Why are you so still?"

Kris licked his lips. "Because if I move, I might ruin your uh Hanukah present." 

"I told you..." Adam began, then shut his mouth. His mother had reminded him to accept Kris' desire to be generous without worrying about Kris' monetary issues. "Okay, so what's the deal?"

"Come closer..."

"Why?"

"Ohmigod, must you question everything?" Kris rolled his eyes. "I can't move, that's why!"

"Why not?" Adam darted over to the kitchen area and switched on the light over the sink. He turned around and looked curiously in Kris' direction and his mouth dropped open. "Well. You've done it again. Surprised me."

"Well?" Kris asked. He stubbed his bare toe into the carpet, waiting and 1, 2, 3....

Adam burst out laughing. "Oh, this is the best Hanukah gift ever!" He walked slowly over to Kris, scanning him up and down. Kris was standing in the middle of his tiny living room space, wrapped in bright blue and silver glittery Hanukah paper, obviously naked underneath. The wrapping paper formed a toga around him. Oh -- Dani must have taped him into it. "I like the way you think." Adam smiled and bent forward to give Kris a warm kiss. Pulling back, he ran his fingertips along the top edge of the paper and began tugging on it. "I can't wait to unwrap this!"

"Wait!" Kris held up his hand, then grabbed Adam's hand and pushed it down. "There are rules. Dani told me all about Hanukah and how you open one gift per night. So, I'm gonna wrap myself up every night and every night you can unwrap one -- one -- body part. You get to choose which part."

"This is a diiiiii-lemmmmmmmaaaaaa..." Adam mused as he circled Kris. He trailed his fingers along Kris' blue and silver-covered buttocks, over his hip and around his torso. Once again facing Kris, he reached out and ran his fingertips along his chest, smiling as the paper crinkled under his touch. Scratching at Kris' nipples with his nails, Adam noted, "Well, these are two of my favorite playthings, but do they count as a set -- as one? Or are they separate?"

"I'm thinking..." Kris moaned as Adam's continued scratching made him stand on tiptoe, trying to get closer.Why had he ever thought taking a week to do this was a good idea? "A set?" 

"Hmm. So that would be one night..." Adam shook his head and pulled his hand back, smiling when Kris pouted. "I'm not sure you get it -- you have to spread the gifts out over seven nights. So what else would I unwrap, given that your hands are free?"

"I'm sure you'll tell me." Kris smiled. Adam loved to tell people what to do, so this present was giving him two gifts. And-- "Oh!" Kris hissed out when Adam's fingers trailed down his thighs. And he was getting a gift too, he decided, as he saw the eagerness in Adam's face as he touched him. 

"I see you neglected to leave room for... growth..." Adam grinned as he watched Kris shift uncomfortably as his hardening cock pressed against the wrapping paper. 

"I..." Kris bit his lip. "I hope I don't get a paper cut in a bad place."

Adam burst out laughing.

"I'm serious!" Kris complained as he felt the edge of paper pressing against the head of his cock. "I didn't really think this through...." He looked down as he heard a sound.

_rrrripp_

"Your dick thought it through -- or rather, it's coming through..." Adam choked out over his laughter as the rising of Kris' cock made a small rip in the edge of paper, enough for the head to poke through. Laughing still harder, he began to hiccup. "I don't th...th....think this counts. Because I didn't rip it. So I get to choose something else."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Kris asked incredulously, staring down at his cock poking out from the blue and silver paper.

"No. But you do have a big dreidel." Adam bit his lip, then cracked up once again. "Hmm, however, will I spin it?" He ran his tongue around his lips.

_rrrripp_

Kris groaned as his cock lifted still more and ripped the paper further. "I'm gonna--"

"Wait. I still have to choose my body part." Trailing his fingers over the paper-covered base of Kris' cock, Adam moved his hand once again around to Kris' hip and then circled him, teasing his fingers over Kris' buttocks. "I could just make a slit back here, you know. Very convenient. And you could reuse the wrapping paper."

"I bought a whole bunch of rolls, so that's hardly my concern--" Kris began, then held his breath as he felt Adam's fingers tugging at an edge of paper at the top of his buttocks. "Is that the body part you're gonna choose? Because you can only choose one --" 

"Yeah, I'm not into rules so much." Adam shrugged and reached his hands out and hooked them in the top edge of the paper near Kris' shoulders. 

_RRRrrrrrrrrrrippppppppppp_

Kris gasped, then burst out laughing as he watched the wrapping paper furl out and then fall away from his body, to float to the floor in a glittery heap. 

"Here is my present...." Adam grinned and pushed Kris down onto the blue and silver paper while unzipping his jeans. 

 

"Blue, huh?" Jacob pointed a finger at Adam's shirt. "Is there going to be some change in your public image I need to know about? If so..." He looked at his watch. "We have about thirty minutes before we have to get to the Staples Center and you two run the gauntlet. So tell me about the shirt." 

"It brings out his eyes. But... Run the gauntlet?" Kris looked nervously up at Adam and reached up behind his neck and toyed with the clasp on the necklace Adam had insisted he wear. Which he actually liked. A lot. He ran his fingers down the chain and toyed with the pendant. "I thought you said it wouldn't be that bad." 

Geoffrey glared at Jacob. "Screw the bloody shirt, Jacob. Kris, I asked you the other day and I'll ask you again -- is there is anything, anything Adam needs to know before he goes public with this relationship? Speak now or forever hold your peace," he ordered. 

"What?" Kris gaped at Geoffrey. He could not be serious.

Jacob rolled his eyes. Geoffrey could not be serious. Oh sure, Allen had his moments, but by nature he was an open-book, easy-going kind of guy. He'd never admit it to Geoffrey, but Adam and Kris were a good compliment to each other. Assuming Kris didn't have something in his past, like an addiction. Because that would be a PITA. He quickly added, "Or if there's anything at all that could come out -- no matter how seemingly inconsequential, like a minor drug addiction in your past -- that we'd have to spin, let me know now so I can make a plan." 

"I..." Kris gulped and looked at Adam. He opened his mouth, but all that came out was, "I'm not sure..."

"Well, is there something?" Adam asked, seeing the hesitation in Kris' eyes. He pulled back from where they'd been standing close to each other in his foyer to get a better vantage point and stared at Kris who... oh hell, NO... who was getting more pale by the second. Adam could feel the sweat pop out on his forehead. Great, his makeup. He'd have to redo it. And the truth was... He looked down at Kris, who was now flushed red and... Seeing the guilt in Kris' face, he snapped, "If so, tell me now. If you have any feeling for me, let me know before I make a fool of myself again."

"No, no... I... Any feeling? Adammm... " Kris slapped Adam's butt, slid his hand up, and curled it around Adam's waist. "You know. I told you, I'm pretty certain I fell in love with you before I finished that cup of coffee in Starbucks." Kris shook his head. "I guess it's my turn to trip your trigger. Sorry, sorry. I'm probably... doing it again. Sorry, sorry."

"What is it?" Jacob asked impatiently.

Geoffrey stared at Adam, saw the anger warring with anxiety and said quickly, "Unless Kris is a better actor than we've given him credit for, there's no way he could fool all of us--"

"All closeted gays are actors," Adam retorted. "Really good actors, able to fool those closest to them. Or at least the people who want to be fooled. All of them act. Even Kris. Who..." Hadn't fooled Cale at all. Then again, Cale had known Kris his whole life. Ack. But he knew Kris. He did. Didn't he? 

"Can I..." Kris licked his lower lip and then looked at Adam, who was not yelling, not like his father had yelled, but was instead looking sick to his stomach. Oh hell. He never wanted to see that look on Adam's face again, that look of self-hate warring with hope. He made a vow to himself to stop this cycle. "Can I tell you in private?"

"Certainly," Geoffrey pointed toward the living room and grabbed Jacob's elbow. "But hurry. And Adam... stay calm and carry on and I'm sure it will all work out just fine." 

 

_  
How was he gonna get out of this mess?_

_What should he do?_

_Where could he go?_

_Was he being punished? Was his father right?_

_Looking at his wallet, Kris bit his lip. He didn't even have enough in there to pay for a night at a fleabag dump. Well, not if he wanted to eat as well. Damn it!_

_He'd come home to find his apartment bolted with a hand-lettered note telling him the landlord had confiscated his belongings for back rent. Thank god, he'd had on decent clothes and his guitar with him for his audition. Although, if God were really looking out for him, he might have had the audition pan out. Or his last employer not screw him over for the last week's of wages. He'd gone back again and again, but the guy was now pretending he'd never seen Kris before and he, after all, had no proof that he'd cleaned those offices. No proof._

_He could use some damn proof that tomorrow would be better. Or even the day after. He knew he was supposed to have faith that God had a plan for him, but right now he'd like to know where he was supposed to sleep tonight. And what he was supposed to eat in two days when his money really ran out._

_If he'd known this was gonna happen, he thought bitterly, he wouldn't have been so cavalier about leaving the guy he'd had sex with last night, who'd asked him to stay over. If he could go back in time, he'd stay the night, take a shower in the morning and hope to cadge some Fruit Loops. If he could go back.... Then again... He could go back to that gay bar. If that guy wasn't there, there was probably another guy. And he was dressed nicely, he could probably..._

_Oh god, what was he thinking! He shouldn't..._

__grrrrrummmmmmble __

_Oh god, he hadn't eaten since yesterday lunch._

__grrrrrummmmmmble __

_Kris put his hand over his stomach._

_Two hours later, a larger hand splayed over his stomach and pulled him back against a much taller body. "What say, we go back to my place? And then we can get some Chinese delivered and see what arises later?"_

_"That sounds great." Kris smiled up at the guy. He was attractive, nice enough, and didn't waste any time. Which any other night would be more than enough. But tonight, he was looking for more than enough. He was looking for a guy with his own apartment who wanted to spend more than ten minutes with him. And he'd apparently found one. Perfect. Oh god... this was so not perfect, but it would do. It would have to. "Let's go."_

_"I've gotta go to work," the guy said with a smile at Kris, the next morning after he checked his phone messages. "But feel free to make yourself breakfast from my vast array of cereal choices and just close the door behind you when you leave."_

_"You're gonna trust me here alone?" Kris asked in shock, frozen half on and half off the stool at the breakfast bar in the tiny kitchen._

_"You're the trustworthy type. I can always tell the kind who will steal my laptop and the kind who worries about taking an extra cup of coffee." The guy grinned again. "Given your hesitation over my Keurig, I can tell which one you are. Leave your number on my fridge." He pointed toward a small pad of paper stuck to the refrigerator. "I'd like to see you again. But first, like I said, feel free to choose between Fruit Loops, Life and Shredded Wheat." He smiled, said goodbye and left, the door slamming behind him._

_**Bang** _

_Staring at the empty expanse of mottled grey granite under his hands, Kris shook his head to clear it. He felt the cold stone under his fingertips and shivered. He had way more important choices to make in the near future than which cereal to pour. Although he should really eat something and oh god, did he have no pride? He had to find a way to get out of this mess. A mess of his own making. The first step was to take a step. Get his ass in gear. That was it._

_He looked longingly at the refrigerator. No. He wasn't that pathetic. He was just looking at the refrigerator to figure out if he should leave his number for the guy. The guy. The guy. Because he didn't even know his name, or remember it, or... Oh god, he was a slut. A slut who'd slept with a guy just to have a place to sleep, which made him not a slut, but a whore. A slut would've been better. In one day he'd gone from being a slut to a whore. His mama would be so proud. Not. And his father... well, his father would say he had been right, that Kris was nothing more than a..._

_In a rush, he launched himself off the stool, nearly tripping as he hurried out of the kitchen and back into the bedroom. Picking up discarded clothing en route to the bathroom, he dressed hurriedly, avoiding looking in the mirror. He wasn't sure which would be worse, seeing the shame in his face or seeing nothing different in his face. The best choice was not to look, he decided, keeping his head down as he rushed toward the front door to the apartment and flung it open. He took a deep breath, then another as he nearly tripped over his own feet rushing out the door and slammed it, hard, behind him._

_**BANG!** _

_Kris looked back at the door. If he were writing a song about it, he'd say he'd left his morals on the other side of that door. He wondered if he'd ever get them back._

 

"So...that's the story. I was...homeless and a...a... whore." Kris whispered, looking at Adam's boots. "Can Jacob spin it? Or... more importantly... Do you see what I've been saying? Do you hate me?"

"No. I hate that you're so insecure and talk badly about yourself. I hate that you think I would turn my back on you because of this and that you felt you had to keep a secret." Adam rubbed his hand on Kris' back. "The truth is, John already told me that you'd been homeless. I already knew. For a long time. And I'm still standing right here. It was your insecurities, not my--" 

"I.." Kris groaned. "I did the same thing with Cale. I... projected, that was it, I projected my own bad feelings about myself onto others." Kris groaned. "I'm sorry."

"Kris. I love _you_. Look at me." Adam asked, cupping his hand around Kris' chin and tilting it up. No wonder Kris had been so touchy about accepting a stupid cup of coffee or a muffin. No wonder Kris had insisted he had been a slut, it had been the better of two evils, in Kris' mind. "You're been beating yourself up about that, haven't you? It's time to let the shame go, don't you think? Forgive yourself. Isn't that what you would tell me or one of your friends?"

"You're right." Kris nodded as he stared up into Adam's eyes that showed a mixture of exasperation and affection, but no disgust. He circled Adam's neck with his ams, sighing in deep relief when Adam automatically hugged him back and wiggled closer. 

"I would and..." Kris smiled suddenly as he registered the solid beating of Adam's heart against his chest and felt a lightness in his own. "You know what? I feel better now. Telling you helped. I guess I needed to say it. Stop holding it in. The telling gave me... freedom. Or the start of it anyway. I guess I need to do some more work, but ..." 

"So write a song about it. Get it out of your system. Because seriously, Kris?" Adam shook his head, then broke into relieved laughter. "You gave me a heart attack! _That_ was it?"

"What is it?" Jacob asked as he stood in the doorway, fighting the urge to scream. "Tell me already so I can start strategizing--"

"I...uh..." Kris looked down at his feet, then looked back up when Lane came into the room. "I..."

Adam sighed and curled his hand around the back of Kris' neck as he answered, "Kris was making mountains out of molehills. And like a breadbasket, when's the last time you've seen a molehill?" 

"Well, actually..." Geoffrey smiled in relief as Kris squeezed Adam's bicep and Adam patted his hand. "My gardener says I have a mole problem."

"Can we focus on the problem at hand?" Jacob reminded them. "Kris, tell me the problem so I can solve it... in oh the next fifteen minutes?"

Adam waited and when Kris said nothing, explained, "When Kris got evicted from his apartment, he slept with a guy to have a place to sleep one night."

"That's it?" Geoffrey and Jacob echoed each other. 

"What the actual fuck, Allen?" Jacob asked impatiently. "Big whoop." 

Lane frowned and touched Kris' shoulder, "Were you... Oh. You were ashamed, right?" 

"I am ashamed," Kris said softly. "Of being homeless and being so desperate that I did...that." 

Staring at Kris intently, Geoffrey shook his head. "As I've said before, every relationship has some sort of quid pro quo in it, even ones that last only ten minutes or overnight. I doubt your date, shall we say, felt like he got the poorer end of the bargain. You didn't take anything he wasn't willing to give. So you need to stop flogging yourself..."

As Geoffrey continued talking, Adam looked at him curiously, wondering when Geoffrey had engaged in conversation about quid pro quos, then realized it had probably been during Kris' interview with him. Adam listened and then smiled softly with gratitude at the older man's gentle ranting. Geoffrey was lecturing Kris the way a father, a good father, would lecture his son, the way his own father had lectured him from time to time. 

Good, that was probably what Kris needed, Adam decided and returned paying attention to the conversation in time to hear Geoffrey ask,"That's all you had to tell Adam?" 

"Yeah. That's it."

"And now, I probably should go change my shirt," Adam said, glaring down at Kris. "You little... I nearly peed myself."

"Sorry?" Kris winced. "I..."

"I think you feel more shame than the situation warrants, hedgehog." Adam took Kris' hand. 

Jacob spoke up. "You were homeless, but not because you were a druggie or drunk, you just had bad luck. It would be a pain in the ass to spin an addiction to heroin or meth or a past that included you selling yourself for booze, but bad luck? Big deal. That could happen to anyone. People can relate to it. Like I said, big whoop."

Adam chuckled silently. Leave it to Jacob to worry about the spin. Then again, maybe Kris needed to spin his own story for himself. "Or you could look at it this way. You've been on mission trips, haven't you?"

"Oh, fuck, you're right!" Kris groaned. "I've never looked down at people who need help, so..." He groaned again. "I guess the big deal is that I was a...whore." He looked from Adam to Geoffrey and back to Adam again before asking, "How you gonna spin that, Jacob?"

"Kris..." Adam pulled Kris into his arms. "Stop labeling yourself like that."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "You need to get over it. It's not like you stole from the guy. Like Geoffrey said, it was a quid pro quo. You were trying to survive. Maybe it wasn't the most quote unquote moral choice you've ever made, but isn't the greatest moral imperative the need to survive? You survived -- don't add survivor guilt to it. Forgive yourself for breaking your own moral code in order to survive."

"He's right," Adam added. "Isn't your Jesus all about forgiveness and redemption? Like I said, you should forgive yourself."

Jacob interjected. "Good point. And -- if this ever gets brought up, that's the story arc you should sell. A fall, forgiveness and redemption." 

"Wow, Jacob, I..." Kris shook his head. "There was an actual nice guy inside the pr rep there for a minute or two." 

"I'm not a total asshole, you know. I just play one for pr purposes." 

"Well, you do a damn good job. Ever thought of going into acting?" Adam asked.

"Ever thought of taking that last acting gig in which you would've played a bitch? It wouldn't be that much of a stretch, would it?" Jacob retorted.

"Oooh, burn." Adam held up his hand and Jacob high-fived it. 

"I hate to break up this bloody fantastic moment of male bonding..." Lane noted and pointed at her watch. "But you're running late, so if you need to change your shirt, Adam..." 

"No, I was just overreacting to prove a point. I like my shirt. Kris picked it out." Adam smiled and held out a hand for Kris.

Sighing and relaxing, Kris took Adam's hand and held on. "Let's go. I want to show you off. You look amaaaazing tonight." 

 

"Adam!" The reporter yelled, "What's up with the blue shirt?"

"It matches the paper my first night Hanukah gift was wrapped in." Adam grinned and looked over at Kris, who was standing with Lane off to the side.

Afterwards Jacob would swear that the entire media line had turned en masse to look in the same direction and that the resulting buzz of sound had deafened his hearing enough that he was blessedly unable to later hear Taylor Swift trying to sing without autotune. 

Kris smiled back at Adam. He could see in Adam's blue eyes the memory of the first night of Hanukah, when as usual, Adam had broken the rules and had exposed all his parts. Kris had laughed then at the failure of his plan, although they'd been having a lot of fun with that wrapping paper for the rest of Hanukah regardless. He began to laugh now at the memory and as Adam held out his hand, Kris walked toward him without a second's thought, forgetting briefly that anyone else was there as Adam pulled him close and Kris stepped into his arms. 

Now, Kris felt as flushed with heat as it seemed as though the world had exploded with a bout of sheet lightning, like one of those storms where the world suddenly shimmered and then seconds later, you heard the boom of thunder. Just like when sheet lightning stopped you in your tracks, Kris paused as the fusillade of flashbulbs exploded in his face, nearly blinding him. He blinked and then felt Adam pull him to his side. Damn, it wasn't a thunderstorm, it was the storm of media attention, the buzzing sound not that of ozone snapping, but the hiss of whispers that rose to a loud scratching of voices competing to be heard. 

Holding up his hand, Adam smiled down at Kris, then looked up and grinned. As the voices and the sound of cameras clicking rose and then began to fall, he waited. When relative silence, fraught with rabid anticipation, descended, he smiled again and asked, "I'm sure you're dying to know who this is, aren't you?"

"God, I could just cry at his timing..." Jacob whispered to Lane. "Really, I could cry."

"Really, I'd rather you die. Shut up!" Lane whispered back, bringing her hand up to her mouth to bite her fingernail. "Shh! Here we go."

Jacob shrugged. "I'm not worried. Adam is... Adam. Who could probably charm even Kris' parents if he wanted to, so entertainment reporters who haven't done their homework? He won't even break a sweat. And we prepped Kris thoroughly. Guy isn't dumb, you know." 

"Who is he?" Several reporters shouted.

"Yeah, Adam! Who's the little guy?" One reporter called out.

"I'm proud to say that this is my boyfriend of several months, Kris Allen." Adam smiled for the cameras and then looked down at Kris.

Kris blinked at the renewed onslaught of flashes and looked up at Adam. Trying to understand the look on his face, Kris quickly realized that Adam looked proud. _That_ was the look on his face. Pride. Adam really was proud to be with him, to introduce him. When was the last time someone had been proud to be with him? "Adammmm..." He whispered, then felt his face crinkle into a broad smile. "You make me happy." He ran his hand up Adam's arm and squeezed the bicep.

Focusing on the happiness in Kris' eyes, Adam forgot for a moment about the cameras and the reporters calling his name. "I hope I always do," he said back, smiling down at Kris and enfolding him in a hug, before turning back to face the rapid fire of shouted questions.

"Boyfriend! Where did you meet him?"

"Where is he from?"

"Is he in the music business?"

"Several months?"

"Did you do a background check on this one?"

"What does your family think of him?"

As the reporters shouted out questions, Adam held up his hand again. When they quieted, he began, "We'll say a few brief remarks, but that's it. You'll have to tune into Jay Leno tomorrow night for a full interview." He squeezed Kris' arm, which was their pre-determined signal for Kris to speak.

Kris swallowed hard and fought the urge to raise his hand to shield his eyes from the flashing glare of the lights and cameras. "As Adam said, my name is Kris -- with a K -- Allen. I live in Los Angeles. We've been dating for several months. And apparently..." Kris looked down to give his eyes a respite from the flashing. "Apparently this is news?" 

"Apparently," Adam agreed drily. "My family and friends have met Kris and given their seal of approval. In fact, we just had Thanksgiving with my family and I can honestly say that everyone would agree that Kris flung a lot of fun into the festivities." Adam grinned. 

"What about Kris' family and friends?" A reporter called out.

Kris nodded and took a deep breath while counting to ten to center himself before answering. Jacob had warned him about this question and they had practiced his answer. "My friends in LA love Adam. I....I have a family in LA and they all love Adam too." 

Which was strictly true, although his LA friends were with the exception of John, Adam's friends and his LA family was Adam's family so they kinda had to love Adam, but still. But as Jacob had pointed out, Kris was telling his current truth. His current truth, which should keep the nosey parkers confused for long enough for Adam to at least do the Leno interview and allowed him to talk about family in public without getting upset the first time under spotlights. Kris snapped back to attention when he realized Adam was now walking towards the line of reporters, all of them seemingly shoving lights and microphones toward them. "Oooh, boy..." He bit his lip.

"It's okay. We're keeping with friendly fire tonight," Adam told him he approached a brunette female reporter. 

Friendly fire kills too, Kris thought as he held onto Adam's arm for dear life. 

"Hi, Laura!" Adam smiled and gripped Kris' hand, squeezing it twice in the signal that a reporter was friendly."This is my boyfriend, Kris. Kris, this is Laura. She's a reporter who is a decent human being."

"I've lived here long enough to know that's an endangered species in Hollywood," Kris retorted, then felt himself flush before Laura smiled. Almost on cue, just as Adam had said she would when they rehearsed the interviews. Creeeeepy. 

"So is a private relationship," Laura agreed and smiled. The young man had made a joke, then blushed. Cute. And glued to Adam's side. Probably terrified by all the shouting directed at him. She hoped he could stay the course. "Therefore, Adam, I have to ask -- How did you manage to keep this new relationship under wraps?"

"I enlisted the help of the enforcers of the gay mafia." 

Laura paused, then laughed. "Oh, the drag queens. Am I right?"

"You'll have to wait until I'm on Leno tomorrow night." Adam smiled. He nodded as Jacob directed him to the next reporter. 

Fifteen minutes later -- that felt like fifteen hours later-- Kris smiled -- he hoped -- at the last reporter. Clamping his hand down on Adam's arm, he whispered, "You were right, they all ask the same exact questions, so you can just give the same answers."

"Right." Adam took Kris hand. Only a little sweaty. Not too bad. Kris was a little pale, but he wasn't vomiting the way he'd suggested he would when he'd woke up from a nightmare at three o'clock this morning, so better than expected. "So if you can prepare for them -- the way we were prepping you--"

"I like the way you prep me in bed better, like this morning..." Kris quipped, then flushed and looked over his shoulder in fear.

Adam laughed as he remembered how he had distracted Kris from his worries and worn him out enough to fall back asleep. "I like that better myself. Maybe I'll find a way to combine the two."

"Forget about it!" Kris shook his head. "I did that and I'll do Leno.. maybe... but that's it. Forever. No more interviews for me." 

Geoffrey smiled and patted Kris on the back, while looking at Adam. "Opposite of a fame whore, isn't he?"

"Yes. Thank you, Geoffrey, for pointing that out." Adam rolled his eyes. "I'm beyond that now. I promise." 

"Good." Kris grinned. "That means I get to pull stupid freak outs without you freaking out in return."

"No. It means you're not going to have any more stupid freak outs--" Adam broke off as they reached Lane and Jacob.

"Excellent job, boys." Jacob smiled broadly as he they all congregated behind the screen. "Excellent. Kris -- very impressive. You managed to say almost nothing and yet didn't offend anyone."

"Thank god that's over..." Kris slumped against Adam. "All those people shouting questions -- how does your head not explode?"

"After a few times, you memorize who is friendly and who is hostile. Other than that, it's what Jacob is for." Adam nodded toward Jacob. "He preps me beforehand about who's likely to be there, who he's made contact with for specific purposes, who to be friendly with and who to be careful with, what information to give out..."

"Yup, that's my job. And sometimes Adam listens to me." Jacob nodded as he looked at his Blackberry. "Okay, guys, the first notices have gone out via Twitter. By the time the concert is over, you should be on a few blogs and E! will probably have a teaser up for their True/False segment on E! News tomorrow night."

Lane held up her phone. "Oh and Ryan texted me. He's annoyed about Leno."

"He'll get over it. And the Tonight Show promos?" Adam asked as he kept walking towards the dressing rooms, pulling Kris along with him.

"NBC will start running promos with the footage from Universal at 8pm Pacific, but..." Jacob looked at his watch. "They'll start on the east coast during the Apprentice -- which is starting in ten minutes. Adam--" 

Adam paused to talk to Jacob. Kris held onto Adam's hand while looking around the backstage area. What a mess. All of the cables and people who looked like they knew what they were doing. He was just gonna stand here and keep quiet. And not think about seeing his face on national television.

"The Tonight Show promos...Which means, Kris, that Conway will start seeing promos in an hour," Geoffrey warned. 

"Are you okay?" Lane asked Kris. She had expected him to be all hedgehog mode about running the gauntlet, but he was oddly quiet. 

"I'm....good." Kris nodded. He wasn't going to think about the possibility of being on Leno or what his parents would think about it. Not gonna think about it. Focus on the moment. Focus on what he had to do. And what he'd already done, which was... he grinned. He had run his first press gauntlet and hadn't sweated through his shirt, his ridiculously expensive tee-shirt and even more ridiculously expensive jacket which was... black. Oh hell, Adam had gotten him into black and he hadn't even realized it.

"Kris!" Lane snapped her fingers in his face. "Are you okay? You blanked out."

"Oh." Kris brushed his hands against his jacket. "I just needed to focus on priorities. How is it that I got Adam out of black, but he put me into black?"

"It's a skill set." Adam grinned as he turned away from talking to Jacob. "Are you okay?"

"I'm good. Even if I'm in black." Kris shook his head as he watched Jacob, Lane and Geoffrey confer over their post-concert plans and heard the word, 'pose'. "Truthfully, I'm more amazed at all the prep that goes into something like introducing a boyfriend. I guess I never realized before that Adam's an industry all by himself."

Jacob nodded as he kept texting. "You bet. He's not only selling merchandise, he's selling himself. People buy products not just due to the quality therein, but due to the perceived value they derive from being associated with --"

"Thanks for the lecture on marketing," Lane interjected. "But Monte's motioning, which means Adam needs to check something out." 

"Are you going to be okay?" Adam asked Kris, bending over him. "I'm glad you're here, but I know this can be overwhelming." 

"I think I'd like something to drink." Kris eyed the backstage bar longingly.

"I'll get you a... beer, is it?" Geoffrey offered. "I'm a little parched myself. Come along, young man." 

"Don't drink too much!" Adam cautioned. He bent down and kissed Kris quickly, then whispered. "Every time you drink you get really friendly and I don't want to see pictures of you wiggling around on Geoffrey."

"Eww!" Kris wrinkled his nose and laughed up at Adam. "He's like my dad or something." 

"I'm sure that's supposed to be insulting." Geoffrey sighed. "But Kris is not my type. I like tall redheads."

"Adam's actually a tall redhead," Kris noted, reaching up and touching the base of Adam's throat in an unconsciously possessive gesture. Mine. Adam belonged to him. "So maybe I should be worried about you two!"

"Adam has a bit more equipment than I'd prefer." Geoffrey smiled as he watched Adam take Kris' hand and kiss the palm. 

"Lane, can I talk to you about the Leno deal in more detail?" Jacob asked. Lane nodded, while Adam excused himself and Kris and Geoffrey went to the bar.

 

Tommy tapped Kris on the shoulder. "Hey. I'm here to bring you back to Adam's dressing room."

"Excellent." Geoffrey smiled and slapped Kris on the shoulder. "Tommy will take care of you."

"I feel like a baby at Disneyland being handed off to a parent while the other one goes to ride Space Mountain," Kris complained.

"What are you doing here, anyway, Geoffrey?" Tommy asked curiously. 

"I have three clients in the line up tonight. It's efficient checking them all out at once," Geoffrey explained. "Plus, it never hurts to schmooze with certain reporters. Or babysit boyfriends."

"What was that about?" Tommy asked, nodding in Geoffrey's direction, as he pointed toward a hallway backstage and they moved towards it.

"I think he wants to make sure I'm okay with all this. That bet, right?" Kris shrugged, just as they met up with the rest of Adam's crew. "Just telling me to enjoy myself. Like I need instructions for that. I'm at a concert, I think I'll manage to enjoy myself." Kris smiled. He was going to see his boyfriend, Adam Fucking Lambert, in concert up close and if he had his way, quite personal. 

"Well, you did look a little pale after going through the red carpet," Monte noted quietly. "You doing okay?"

"Humph." Neil scowled and crossed his arms over his chest. "The guy started a food fight at Thanksgiving. I think he can handle some stupid photographers."

"I did not start a food fight at Thanksgiving," Kris snapped back, then grinned. "You didn't throw anything _back_ at me. So no fight. It takes two to fight." 

Neil scowled. He wasn't sure he liked this boyfriend of Adam's who had way too much chutzpah. "Yeah, because even at our worst, Adam and I knew to never throw food in our parents' house."

"But you could throw the shit at him?" Kris glared. "Nuh-uh. Not on my watch." 

 

_  
"Watch the size of your helping of the potatoes, Adam." Neil smiled._

_"Did I ask your opinion?" Adam snapped back._

_"Just trying to be my usual helpful self." Neil smiled again._

_Kris' head snapped up. There was something in Neil's voice. And that smile -- it was a Grinch smile. He looked at Adam and whispered, "No one with any brains would trust the Grinch."_

_"Shut up, Neil." Adam glared, although his hand hesitated on the spoon._

_"Go ahead," Kris urged. "It's Thanksgiving. It's our right as Americans to eat as much as we want." And as someone who had been hungry, he wasn't going to ever pass up the opportunity to eat ever again._

_"Indeed. And thanks for making this sweet potato dish," Leila added with a glare at Neil and a smile for Kris. Kris had been so proud as he'd handed over his covered dish. "It looks delicious."_

_Neil shook his head. "Adam needs to watch both potato dishes. The carbs -- will go right to his waist. And lord knows, the rock slash sex god can't have a muffin top, which-- Ow!" Neil massaged his shin where Adam -- who was of course wearing boots -- had just kicked him._

_Seeing the anger on Adam's face, but the hurt in his eyes, Kris would later say he just snapped. "Stop it!"_

_"Hey, Adam knows it too, those potatoes -- you should just give them over to me--"_

_"Oh, I'll give them over to you!" Kris exclaimed, then reached into the bowl of potatoes with his hand, scooped out a mound and flung them into Neil's face._

_"Huwha...." Neil spluttered. "Adam--"_

_"Just shut your mouth!" Kris yelled and flung more potatoes directly toward Neil's mouth. "Adam! Listen--" Kris broke off as he finally registered Adam's laughter._

_Shaking his head and laughing, Adam covered his face with his hands. "Ohmigodohmigod, the look on his face... Ohmigod... Kris, what did I do for fun before that day you walked into Starbucks?"_

_Kris slapped his hand on Adam's shoulder. "We're not going to sit around and listen to this shit-- pardon me, Miz Lambert -- this stuff coming out of Neil's mouth. We're gonna--"_

_"Adam, your jacket..." Leila began, then slapped a hand over her mouth. She should have never mentioned it. Here we go... 1, 2, 3...._

_"You got potatoes on my jacket!" Adam said in a daze, looking down at his sleeve. "My leather jacket. My custom leather jacket. My blue custom leather jacket. With studs!"_

_"Screw your jacket! What about me?" Neil complained, wiping potatoes off of his face._

_"You?" Adam looked up and then pulled his phone out and took a picture. "You deserved it, asshole. I may need to watch my weight, but at least I don't need to watch my mouth because garbage comes spilling out of it. Asshole."_

_"Moommmmm!" Neil whined, standing up and stomping over towards the kitchen sink. Running water, he washed his face and demanded, "Well, do something!"_

_"Hmmm." Leila shrugged and reached for the sweet potato casserole. After some of the fights the boys had in the past, this was pretty tame. "Clean up and come back to the table like a civilized person. Or go home."_

_"But_ he _wasn't acting like a civilized person." Neil wiped his face on a towel and pointed at Kris._

_"He didn't punch you in the mouth. Which he looked like he wanted to do." Leila looked at her older son, who was taking off his jacket and using a napkin to try and clean it. Probably a lost cause._

_"I'm sorry, ma'am." Kris bit his lower lip nervously. "I really don't know what came over me."_

_"I do. You were protecting the person you love." Leila smiled. "Just don't let your protectiveness involve my potatoes in the future, okay?"_

_"Okay." Kris looked down and then over at Adam, who was muttering. Oh no, Adam was probably totally pissed that Kris had thrown potatoes. At Thanksgiving. "What is it? I'm sorry about throwing the potatoes at Neil, even if he did deserve it--"_

_"Oh who cares about Neil's face? It'll wash. You got potatoes on my jacket. On my blue jacket. My custom jacket. You got potatoes on my jacket."_

 

"Oh, that's the jacket Adam says he's in mourning about!" Tommy grinned. "He said he's gonna write a song about it, but not reveal that what died was a jacket until the end of the song."

"Aren't you gonna thank me for having sex with him again? And speaking of Adam, where is he?" Kris asked. He hadn't come backstage to hang out with the band.

Monte pointed toward a closed green door and smiled as Kris hurried toward it. The guy was so obviously head over heels for Adam. It was good to see. And even better to hear the new music Adam had been playing for him the other day. 

"Hey, Sutan." Kris smiled as he closed the door and heard Adam softly warming up his voice.

"Hey, baby." Sutan smiled back as he put a small-tip brush back in the case. "Great timing. I'm done. Tell me what you think of your boyfriend. Your official boyfriend." 

Adam grinned. "I should put a tattoo on you to claim you." He touched Kris' hand to pull him closer. 

Kris smiled as Adam tugged him; he did love when Adam got bossy like that and the energy rolling off him was contagious. He began to fidget.

"A nipple ring would be hotter," Sutan said.

"Oooh, it would." Adam smiled as Kris winced. "You could have a ring with a little charm with an 'A' for Adam."

"You can keep piercing equipment away from sensitive areas. Eeek! What's this?" Kris reached out, but knew better than to touch the glitter on Adam's cheek, jaw and neck that formed triangles and rectangles.

"It's to form a snowflake." Sutan shook his head. "He told me he wanted to be festive."

"Where's the snowflake?" Kris asked in confusion. He looked more closely and realized there was the edge of a snowflake showing through the narrow arrow of skin showing between the placket of Adam's shirt. "Why aren't you showing it off more?" Kris reached out and began unbuttoning the shirt.

Sutan agreed. "My thoughts exactly. What's the point of my artistry going unseen?"

"No kidding!" Kris smiled at Sutan, who he'd gotten to know while he and his friends had helped run interference with the paps. 

"I don't think--" Adam protested, grabbing Kris' wrists before he could completely unbutton the shirt. 

"Don't think, just do...." Kris grinned and rubbed his groin against Adam's bent knee.

"Is that supposed to be Yoda?" Sutan asked, gathering up his equipment while watching Kris pretend to fight off Adam's hands. Hmm. A blue shirt, a request to be festive and now Kris was pushing Adam to expose more of his skin. He liked the little guy. 

"Or a Nike ad," Kris retorted, grabbing Adam's hands and pushing them down to the arms of the chair as he ordered, "Just let _me_ see." 

If he really were a snowflake, he would have melted by now, Adam thought as he sat back and felt the heat of Kris' gaze on him. If they had more time, he'd make Kris melt under his tongue. Kris looked so damn edible with that tight green tee-shirt and even tighter pair of dark black jeans. Which were growing even tighter by the second, Adam noted and licked his lip as he moved his gaze back up to Kris' face. 

"You look amazing..." Kris leaned against the dressing table and took a long, slow perusal of Adam from head to foot and back again. God, how had he ever been given the opportunity to call this gorgeous man his? "I really like that glitter on your chest. Really. Like. That. Glitter. Is it the edible kind?" Kris bent forward and licked his lips. "I like that edible glitter." 

"I'll... just lock the door on the way out... And get myself a cold drink because all of a sudden, it got really warm in here..." Sutan murmured as he quickly backtracked toward the door. "Fifteen minutes, Adam. And no kissing -- you'll mess up the make up!" 

"I know. I've got my eye on the clock---" Adam shrugged, then gasped in surprise as Kris slipped his hands under the loose edges of Adam's shirt. "What are you...ohhh!" He exclaimed as Kris' fingers found his nipples and pinched them. "Seriously... Ohhhh..." He moaned as Kris' hands caressed his skin. 

"Seriously, you look so fucking _hot_. Is it edible?" Kris stared down at Adam's skin. Mine, mine, mine. 

"No, it's regular..." Adam trailed off, looking at Kris in amazement. He saw the desire in Kris' eyes and automatically looked down. Oh hell, Mr, Happy was making an appearance. He stared into Kris' face wondering if anyone had ever wanted him the way Kris did. 

"You need to use the edible kind--"

"It would melt when I sweat," Adam said absently, reaching out to curve his hands around Kris' hips and pull him between his legs. 

"I'd lick it up. I'd lick it all up." Kris slid his hands back down, skimming over the slippery fabric of Adam's shiny pants and then cupping his cock and balls. So big. He liked that big dick, yes he did. "Did I mention I'd lick it all up?" 

"Stop..." Adam laughed and tried to push Kris' hands away. "I'm not supposed to go out there like this, remember?"

"Hmmm..." Kris pulled one hand free and used it to stroke the long length pressing against the pants. How about I take care of that for you?"

Adam laughed again. "You know, you're not helping. Don't kid around--"

"Who says I'm kidding?" Kris asked, reaching for the zipper.

_zzzzippp_

"We can't--" Adam protested half-heartedly, his cock already thinking for him as Kris' hand closed around him. "I can't..."

"You don't have to do anything. Just sit there and tell me you love me and let me show you how I love you." Kris knelt and stared up into Adam's eyes, marveling once again how the color blue could be so warm. "Damn, you're so hot." 

"I love you..." Adam repeated as they stared at each other while Kris' mouth sucked Adam's cock inside. "Love you... oh!" Adam cried out softly as he watched Kris' lips and felt his tongue move on the underside, quickly finding the super-sensitive spot Kris usually teased until the end, but which he was manipulating with his tongue so quickly, so strongly... Oh hell. 

This was heaven right here, Kris thought as he felt Adam's gaze on him like another kind of lightning. If the flash of cameras before had been sheet lightning, the sharp heat in Adam's eyes and the quick and frantic movements of his hips, pushing his cock deeper into Kris' mouth, were like streaks of lightning, flashing with heat. Kris moaned. Damn, even when Adam was being given pleasure, he still knew how to give it, those rolling hips and soft words were shockingly intense. As was the need Kris felt to give and then... Kris licked the head and tasted the sweet fluid and moaned again. 

The look in his eyes, the love and heat mixed together... And oh god, people were right outside, they had to hurry and... Kris slid his hands up Adam's thighs and twined their fingers together as he moaned softly and that was all it took. All he needed was right here, Adam knew as he let himself go. 

"I really should've done that for you, for putting up with running the gauntlet before..." Adam smiled as he zipped up his pants, then gently rubbed his thumb along Kris' lower lip. "And I'll pay you back later."

"Is that the quid pro quo Geoffrey was talking about?" Kris asked, then flushed as he stood up. 

"It's keeping the score even, sure. I don't want to be just a taker, even if you are so damn good at giving." Adam slowly stroked his fingertip along Kris' lips, which had just given him pleasure. "And also doing what I want, which is to feel you come undone under my hands and to feel you lose yourself in my mouth. Believe me, I want that." 

"Adam! It's time!" Lane yelled. "Open this door right now! I can't believe you! And Kris? I'm gonna kill you."

"You know, for an easy-going guy, you certainly have brought a lot of excitement into my life." Adam grinned as he zipped up his pants and walked toward the door. "Hey, Lane. Keep your shirt on."

"It's not my clothing that's flying around the room!" Lane peered suspiciously into the dressing room.

"No clothes went flying." Kris smirked as he grabbed for one of the water bottles on the vanity. "All clothes stayed in place. You have such a dirty mind, Laney." 

Lane stared at him curiously. "You seem more.... relaxed, Kris. No more hedgehog?"

"I know how to soothe his.... quills." Adam grinned and pulled Kris in for a last hug. "You're going to enjoy the show, right?"

"I'm really gonna enjoy this..." Kris said, tilting his head back to stare up into Adam's face. He whispered, "I'm gonna see you up there and know I just sucked you off. Because you're mine." Mine, mine, mine. Free and clear. Adam is mine.

 

That amazing man is mine! Kris thought to himself as he clapped loudly and whistled even more loudly as Adam strutted out to begin his set. 

"Adam's really.... loose tonight," Jacob yelled over to Geoffrey. 

Geoffrey nodded and stepped aside in the VIP box for Lane to move forward for a while.

Jacob tapped his foot along with the music and then looked from Adam to Kris and back again. What...? No. He froze. "He looks like a guy who just had his clock cleaned." He looked over at Kris who was dancing a little dance and looking like a guy enjoying a concert... except for the smug little smile on his face whenever Adam would move his hips. Huh. Oh. OH! Jacob blinked and looked forward, then gasped. He turned toward Kris and grabbed his arm. "Tell me that when you did... whatever it was you did, that--"

"The door had a lock on it." Kris grinned and looked back at the stage. "Damn, he's like sex on wheels. I can't wait until after the show." 

Jacob groaned and then turned back to Geoffrey. "Make sure Adam's concert contracts specify a locked door from now on."


	24. Taken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks  
> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 24: Taken**

"To prepare, here's my last interview with Leno--" Adam pointed at the screen. 

_  
"So, Adam, you're dating drag queens now? Is that a new venture for you?"_

_"Well, isn't life more interesting when you take chances, try new things?" Adam raised one eyebrow._

_"You could have taken up a new sport."_

_"I already jog, but aside from that I'm not into activities that require sweating... Hmm. Wait a minute... Adam put his finger up and smirked. "Well, that's not entirely true. Let me rephrase. I'm not into activities that require equipment... No, wait, you all know that's not true!"_

_"Adammmm...." Jay slapped the desk with laughter. "Now, don't set off the censors."_

_"Why, Jay. I'm talking about dancing."_

_"What equipment do you need to dance?" Jay asked._

_"I've been known to use a long cylindrical device when I dance..." Adam smoothed his hands down his thighs and back up again. "You know what I'm talking about."_

_"I'm afraid to ask."_

_"My cane. That's all. You're the one with the dirty mind." Adam grinned._

 

"I think you broke it," Kris groaned as he looked down at what he held in his hands.

"It would take a lot more than that to break it," Adam retorted. "You're doing it wrong."

"I think I know how to do it." Kris poked at it impatiently.

"You should listen to Adam. He's the Jedi master and you are just the young padawan--" Lane began.

"Oooh----" Adam held up his index finger.

"You are not going to call me padawan," Kris said instantly.

"But can I still show you my light saber?" Adam asked, leering exaggeratingly at Kris. "Or show you how to use yours better?"

"Like how? Make it light up--" Kris froze and then grinned eagerly. "Wait. There's no way to do that, is there?"

"Glow in the dark condoms," Adam answered promptly. "Lane, make a note--"

"I am not buying you glow in the dark condoms." 

"But Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaane..." Adam whined as he and Lane continued to banter while waiting for the car to take them to the NBC studios and not so coincidentally distract Kris so he wouldn't freak out. 

"No, seriously, I think you broke Twitter," Kris announced as he looked up from his phone while sprawled across the futon in his apartment.

"Can I break this chair?" Lane muttered as she shoved aside an oddly wide footstool with Kris' name on it and gingerly sat down in the chair with rusty orange blotches on it. Yikes, she hoped they weren't _stains_. Adam was right. This chair might be the most hideous chair in the history of chairdom. She would bet that when the day came that Adam had Kris move in with him, the chair would somehow get lost or broken along the way. And she'd help. 

"I heard you, Lane." Kris pouted in Lane's direction. "Why does everyone hate on my chair? And why does this Jim guy from MTV keep calling me cute?"

"You are cute," Adam said absently as he texted Jacob.

"But who _says_ that? To a stranger? Is he hitting on me via Twitter? That's just wrong -- I'm taken!" Kris protested as he continued ranting.

Adam looked up and enjoyed the sight of Kris sprawled across the futon, his jeans stretching tightly across his thighs and began to walk toward him. Yup, Kris was indeed taken.

"I mean, don't you think that's kinda creepy and -- Mumphmmmm..." Kris moaned as Adam sat down on the futon, then immediately took his mouth in a deep possessive kiss, curling his hand around Kris' throat.

Lane sighed and rolled her eyes as Kris pushed up to try and straddle Adam's hips. "Should I leave perhaps while you stake your claim, Adam?"

Pulling back from Kris' clinging lips and hands, Adam shoved Kris' knee down from where Kris had begun to climb on top of him and gently pushed Kris back down onto the futon. Smiling down at Kris as they both remembered the last time he'd pushed Kris down on the futon only to move between his legs and fuck him until they fell off the futon, he told Lane, "No, but I had to reward him for remembering that he's taken." 

"Sure." Lane shook her head, then smiled. "He is awfully hard to resist -- all that cuteness..." she teased, knowing it would set Kris off. 

"Hey, I'm a little old to be cute!" Kris protested, raising up on his elbows. "If Twitter weren't broken, I'd set up some alias account and tweet that back at him. Ha! I should. What do you think, sweetie?"

Adam smiled at Kris' unconscious endearment. "Well, aside from learning to ignore the nastiness and making your account private, my most important piece of Twitter advice is to avoid going on a rant when you're drunk." 

Kris' felt his lips twitch into a smile and looked toward the window to keep from laughing, then gave in. "You know, when my phone was on the counter and it would buzz with a text once, twice and then a third time, I'd say, 'Wow, Adam Lambert's ranting about something. Is it hair or clothes?' And I was right -- it was always you on a rant about something. You are a world-class Twitter ranter."

"Well....Okay, so I can't talk." Adam blushed. "Just... don't do it drunk." 

"I had a Coke for lunch. I'm not drunk."

"No, but you were ranting." Adam laughed as he pulled Kris' legs over his lap. "Hedgehog, _we_ broke Twitter. Or you did. My Glamberts are excited about you." He smiled as he ran his right hand up Kris' thigh and burrowed under Kris' tee-shirt to stroke the taut skin of his stomach.

Stifling a moan at the feel of Adam's fingers on his bare skin, teasing the light hairs above the waistband of his jeans, Kris pushed Adam's hand away. Adam could be such a cocktease. He asked, "Is that good or bad?"

"They're going to find out all about you before the media does," Adam warned, as he had before. Running his hands up and down Kris' legs, he noted, "Remember -- that's why I told you, I mean, _suggested_ you tell a brief version of your story on Leno? To beat them and the media to it?"

Kris looked at Lane and rolled his eyes. "Suggested? Suggested? In the Adam Dictionary is 'suggested' a synonym for 'bossed around'?"

"Well, bossed around is actually a phrase and therefore wouldn't be in a dictionary -- mine or any other -- Oooof!" Adam grunted as Kris kneed him in the stomach, then laughed. He cautioned, "There's going to be some nasty comments. They can hurt sometimes."

"I know. I used to do Twitter searches for your name. I'm a _fan_ , remember?" Kris grinned. That comment about him being a fan should distract Adam from contemplating nasty comments. 1, 2, 3... "A big fan. I had this picture of you--" 

Through gritted teeth, Adam ground out, "It freaks me out when you say that and... Oh." Adam sighed as he caught a glint of satisfaction in Kris' eyes. "You were trying to get me going. Why were you trying to get me going?"

"Because it's fun. You know, I probably could make up some mashed potatoes myself..." Kris teased, slapping his palm down on Adam's shoulder, clad as usual in a leather jacket. 

"Ha. Skingraft was able to clean my jacket. At, I might add, considerable expense. How do you plan on paying me back?" Adam teased, then almost immediately froze. "Oh hell, I didn't mean to imply--"

Squeezing Adam's arm, Kris shook his head. "That's okay. I know you were teasing. I am not a whore. I have it on good authority--"

"Meaning me!" Lane called out.

"Yeah, surrrrrre...." Kris drawled, laughing when Lane stuck her tongue out at him. "Geoffrey gave me this lecture last night about how you have to acknowledge your mistakes, learn from them, and then move on. Or you become... what word did he use?"

"Insufferable. He likes that word." Lane nodded decisively, even as she wondered. For all of his marriages, Geoffrey had no children of his own and had never seemed to want any, but people evolve. Maybe... yes, that was probably it. He had recently been talking about regrets and his second wife, so maybe he saw Kris as some sort of surrogate son. Well, that would be good for both of them. Anything would be better for Kris than having a relationships with his wanker of a father. " Is Geoffrey becoming a father figure for you?" she asked gently, sharing a glance with Adam. 

"I..." Kris stiffened. "Maybe. I dunno."

Adam nodded at Lane and pulled Kris sideways onto his lap, seeing Lane's sigh of relief when Kris relaxed into his embrace. "Did you hear from Cale -- did he see any of the coverage from last night?" Adam smiled as Kris rubbed his chin on Adam's shoulder. Kris might actually be the most physically affectionate and yet non-clingy guy Adam had ever met. Rubbing his hand along the mess of Kris' hair, Adam smiled down at Kris' happy face as he arched his neck to push his head back into Adam's touch. 

"I heard from Cale. He Googled me!" Kris reported, then laughed. "He found pictures from last night."

"What did he say?" Adam asked. "That you never looked better?"

"He asked why I looked like an undertaker." Kris smirked. "All that black." 

"He did not!" Adam sniffed. "You looked elegant."

"Yeah, you gotta understand that Cale's idea of elegance is an ironed tee-shirt. But wow -- I can't believe you can Google me. Just two days ago, I was a nobody. I was invisible and now you can Google me?" 

Lane said with a quick smile, "We walked into that Starbucks and noticed you right away. Brad and Alli knew you were the one right from those few seconds on Leno before. You were never invisible to us." 

Adam agreed and reminded Kris, "You're going to be way more visible after tonight. Are you sure you want to talk to Leno? You don't have to," he told Kris once again. 

 

"This is the only interview I intend to ever do. Ever!" Kris shook his head at Jacob as they stood around reviewing what they'd filmed so far. He'd enjoyed the filming, but the mock interview he'd done with Jacob before Jay Leno -- holy shit, Jay Leno -- had shown up had been... no fun. And wow, Allen, you're so articulate like they'd want you back anyway. 

"Well, thanks for agreeing to it." Jay nodded, then asked, "Why me?"

"You always supported Adam, even after the AMAs. Plus, for me -- your mechanic fixed my car and showed me how to fix it myself. Quid pro quo? That's the way LA works, right?"

"Fair enough, but I should warn you that plenty of people will take your quid without giving you a quo," Jay cautioned.

Adam smiled. "Yeah, he knows. He's been to gay bars." 

 

"So, Adam, where did you meet your new boyfriend? A bar?" Jay asked as they sat at the desk and chairs before the studio audience.

"We met in a coffee shop here in LA. I saw this cute guy in front of me--"

Jay held up his hand. "Now, wait a minute. If he was in front of you, how did you know he was cute?"

"I was hoping the front view would equal the back view." Adam looked at the camera and winked. "And I was right."

"Were you?"

"Oh yeah. His face is even cuter than his butt." 

 

Kris felt his face turn red and he rubbed the back of his neck. 

"Are you okay?" Leila asked, touching his shoulder.

"My mother is gonna... " Kris froze. Why should he care what his mother's reaction to outing himself on Leno with Adam would be? "Oh screw it. I watched those videos and I need to face the truth. Anything I do or say will just confirm that she, they made the right decision in their own mind," Kris told Leila. Lane reached out and squeezed his other shoulder and he found himself smiling at the two women because really, he was okay. He did have friends now. It made it easier to face the truth. "Truth is, they tossed me aside like trash. My father because I didn't conform to his notions of what an acceptable man was and my mother because she was afraid of what people would say!" He squared his shoulders and nodded. 

Lane nodded back. She had done those interviews. Kris might know the truth intellectually, but... 

"Like Adam says when he quotes Dr. Seuss, the people who matter won't mind and the people who mind don't matter." Kris watched Adam on the screen where they were waiting in the hallway. He was gay and dating Adam Lambert and he was proud of both truths. He had no reason to hide. 

 

"So how did you keep him hidden all this time?" Jay held up his hand. "Wait, I know. He was hiding behind feathers and sequins."

"Hiding in plain sight works best for Kris." Adam grinned. 

"So he was here all along and we just didn't see him?"

"Absolutely. I brought along a clip reel so you can play the game of 'where's Kris?' Who, I will point out, is way hotter than Waldo."

The screen filled with a montage of scenes, first showing Kris with Adam in his Dusty costume at Universal, then a badly grained video of Kris ducking in between a gang of drag queens outside a club while Adam was being hounded by paparazzi a few feet away. The clips then moved on to Kris in the group of a NBC studio tour, the back of his head in a small crowd scene at the Days of Our Lives set, and playing guitar with the warm-up band for the Tonight Show. 

Adam grinned as the monitors faded and the houselights came back up, only to show Kris sitting next to Adam on the couch. "Here you are!"

"Here I am..." Kris said in a low voice, focusing on Adam's eyes and ignoring the buzz of laughter in the audience. He was going to be okay, he was going to be okay. The audience was full of Glamberts and Jay liked Adam. It was okay. No one was going to throw him out. 

"So, Kris..." Jay began, knowing that the longer a nervous guest did not speak, the more anxious they would become. "We've established that you can hide amongst boas -- and I don't mean snakes -- and that the back of your head works really well in a soap opera scene and that you can play guitar. What else do we need to know?"

"I..uh... I'm originally from Arkansas, but I've made my home in LA now for a few years. Like you saw, I can play guitar. And..." Kris breathed out, then in, then back out again. This wasn't so bad. Like Adam had said, just act like it was a normal conversation. "I met Adam in a Starbucks months ago and we've been dating every since." 

"So what attracted you to Adam?" Jay prompted.

"Besides the obvious?" Kris looked Adam up and down and unconsciously ran his hand up Adam's arm and squeezed his bicep. He blinked as the audience laughed and began hooting. 

Jay grinned. "Besides the obvious. His large.... bank account." 

Kris let out a breath. He had practiced this question with Jacob. It was important for Kris to establish that he wasn't after Adam's money. And he could prove if only to himself that he wasn't really a whore. No, he wasn't. He forced a smile, which became genuine as he forgot about his rehearsed answer and suddenly blurted out in all honestly, "It's not size of the _money roll_ in his pocket that's of interest to me." 

Surprised at his ad lib, Jay and Adam both stared at Kris, then a second later burst out laughing. Kris grinned back at them. This wasn't horrible. As long as it could be over. Soon. Like now. Really, like now. He rubbed damp palms down his denim-clad thighs and fidgeted when Adam's hand came over and took his, squeezing it reassuringly. 

Seeing the panic in Kris' eyes and Adam's gesture of comfort, Jay turned back to Adam. "Let's be honest here. You've had your share of romantic problems. How did you get past that and see a guy you think is cute and be willing to try again?" 

"Well, I think anyone who has success -- in any field -- worries about whether the other person is interested in them for themselves or for the image or for the benefits of success. I don't think it matters much if you're an entertainment celebrity or the small town football team captain or the head of a company or the quote unquote hot bartender at a nightclub -- there are always people who either want to use you for their own gain or who are in love with the image."

"So how did you _know_ with Kris?"

Adam smirked even as he dissembled. No way was he going to give out the intimate details, when a useful distraction would suffice. "It might have been when he threw mashed potatoes at my brother for mouthing off at me." 

"You threw potatoes at Adam's brother?" Jay asked incredulously. "I wish I could have seen that!"

"Yeah. He deserved it. Jerkface---" Kris yelped and slapped his free hand over his mouth. 

Adam laughed and pulled Kris' hand down. "See? The man has no filter. I know what he says is true." 

 

"Well, give it to me straight. How bad did I do?" Kris asked as they waited for their car to be pulled around.

"You did great." Adam pulled Kris to his side in a hug. "I've only said that a katrillion times." 

"I called your brother a jerkface on national tv," Kris reminded Adam.

"The best part of the whole interview..." Jacob muttered under his breath. "The twitter feed from the audience is all positive." 

"I can't wait until that clip airs tonight." Adam smirked. "He's going to give himself a hernia from screaming at the tv. Ha!"

"But isn't the headline gonna be something like, 'Lambert's new boy toy hates his brother. Family drama in their future?"

"Probably. Who cares?" Adam shrugged, then grinned. "Oooh, maybe, the paps will start following Neil. See - it's a win-win."

"You boys...." Leila shook her head. Someday, if her sons would work _together_ , really work together...

Jacob shook Kris' hand. "Good job."

"Seriously?"

"Yes, seriously. You were a good sport with the filming and you were polite. Jay likes polite. Jay likes Adam. Jay likes that Adam brings his mother, who taught Adam to be polite. You both gave some funny moments. They'll edit the clips to make us look good. We're all good."

"Are they gonna leave in me calling Neil a jerkface?"

"You bet." Jacob laughed. "Neil has been here with Adam before. Jay's producer thinks he's a jerkface too." 

 

"He called me a jerkface on national tv!" Neil yelled into his phone from Chicago. "There's two hours before it airs on the west coast, Adam. You gotta--"

"I'm going to visit my boyfriend at work now, bro. Or should I call you jerkface? Yeah, I like the sound of that. _Jerkface._ " 

"You can't--"

"Hey, all those names you've called me since we were kids... A rose by any other name, bud." Adam disconnected on Neil's squawk and opened the door to Kris' bar. 

"Rocky!" A few voices cried out.

Adam lifted his hand in greeting and walked towards the end of the bar. He had been here enough times that the regulars knew who he was and knew his relationship with Kris. His costume and alias had become an inside joke that made them feel part of the scam to fool the paparazzi, which meant the bar was a safe place for Kris. Kris had to work tonight and John knew he was going to be on Leno, so Adam wanted to be with Kris while he watched the final edited version of the interview. 

 

"Ohmigod, I'm gonna hurl..." Kris moaned two hours later, when their clip ended and the Tonight Show went to commercial.

"Hey, you did good!" John grinned and slapped Kris on the back. "What do you guys think?"

"Oooh, our Kris is famous now!" A guy sitting at the bar teased. 

"Yeah, too good to pour us beer!"

"Not as long as you still tip him!" John retorted.

"We're supposed to tip?" A man asked in mock surprise while the others laughed.

Another man joked, "Hey, Kris -- you looked really good in that scene at Days of Our Lives!"

"How'd you know it was Days of Our Lives?" Another guy asked and the two men digressed into a discussion about their "wive's" soap opera preferences. 

"So you didn't have Kris dress up like a drag queen?" Another regular named Rick laughed as he too joked.

"No, not my type. " Adam shook his head and nodded toward Kris' usual tee-shirt and jeans. "I like my guys dressed like that. Otherwise, it takes too long to get them undressed." 

"Oh, good point." Rick nodded and opened his mouth to tease again. 

"Really. Really?" Kris asked, glaring at Rick. 

Rick laughed. "Lighten up, Kris. Just teasing." 

"Everyone here is cool with it, bro," John said quietly, squeezing Kris' shoulder. "Got that? We all already knew you were gay and knew you were with Adam. It's cool."

"I..." Kris looked down at his feet, then back up, noting suddenly that the bar was quiet. "I... yeah. I get it." 

"I'm the one who got lucky. The next round of drinks are on me!" Adam called out, knowing that the flurry of activity would keep Kris busy and keep him from worrying needlessly about his interview. 

 

"You're sure you're okay with locking up?" John asked, as he stood at the back door. 

"Yeah. I'm good. Adam's here with me." Kris smiled at John, while stacking a chair on a table. 

"I'll watch you out to your car," Adam offered, moving to the doorway. For Kris' benefit, he added, "This neighborhood isn't good."

"Sure." John nodded as Adam stood next to him, recognizing that Adam wanted to say something. 

"Thanks for making it easy on Kris tonight," Adam said in a low tone. 

"It was nothing. Everyone likes Kris. He's a nice, easy-going dude who can talk about sports and is a good listener. Good bartender, good friend. When he's not being paranoid about being gay. Hopefully, he's ready to move on from that for good now, what with coming out--"

"As the boyfriend of the world's biggest gay guy?" Adam grinned. "He better be ready."

John shook his head. "I think from the way he was chewing his lip when the pap videos of you out with your friend Sutan were on screen that he's more than ready for the world to know that you belong to him."

"And vice versa. He's mine," Adam said quietly. "Thanks again." He waited until John was safely in his car, then shut the door and locked it carefully. Turning around to walk back into the bar, he announced, "I'm not sure I like you walking to your car alone late at night in this neighborhood."

"John and I usually walk out together and -- You are not serious." Kris paused as he put the last chair up on the table to stare at Adam.

"I'm as serious as Simon Cowell looking at his financial portfolio. Which means, very serious." Adam nodded as he walked toward Kris.

"You are not picking me up every night." Kris shook his head and stepped backwards, away from Adam. If Adam started arguing with him or worse, kissing him while arguing with him, he was probably going to cave and he didn't want to cave, well, not on this matter, anyway. Or not until he'd gotten a lot of kisses.

"Okay." Adam stepped towards Kris, smiling as Kris skirted a table.

Kris looked suspiciously up at Adam. Adam had that wolfish smile on his face. "Oh no, oh no. You do not give in that easily. What scheme do you have up your sleeves?"

"I could send a car for you." Adam feinted to the left and laughed when Kris moved to the right, but evaded his hands.

"I knew it!" Kris gasped, half-laughing, as they played a game of catch me if you can. 

"You know, it's a little disconcerting that you know me so well already...." Adam said softly. It had been shocking for a long while actually, as though Kris were on some inside track to his brain. "Did someone give you Spark Notes on me or something? Did Lane or Tommy or Geoffrey coach you--"

"What?" Kris asked, stopping half-way around a table, his head snapping to the side to stare at Adam incredulously.

"Oh god. I am so paranoid." Adam slapped his forehead, while taking a slow, long step in Kris' direction. 

"I think they make drugs for that these days. Good drugs. You might want to ask your doctor about it. Like your doctor in LA. Not my old one in Arkansas. Hey -- did you talk to him too? Did you find out about the chickenpox I got when I was six or --" Kris broke off as he noted the glint in Adam's eyes just as Adam reached out and grabbed him, puling him up against his body. "You were playing me." 

Adam grinned. Kris had forgotten all about Leno. "See? I'm over my paranoia -- I can joke about it." He tipped Kris' chin up and brushed his lips across Kris' upturned mouth, before slowly sliding his tongue inside to taste. 

"Don't worry about it. Dusty." Kris grinned, flicking his fingers at Adam's stupid trucker hat. Trucker hat with rhinestones. "Oh and speaking of doctor... Lane gave me the number of a doctor and I'm going in for a second round of tests next week. I'll give you a copy of the results. They'll be clean, you know." 

"It's been six months, that's right. Do you want to see a copy of mine or will my word suffice?"

Kris grinned and began trotting away, laughingly telling Adam, "I'm not the paranoid one." 

"No, but you're gonna be the dead one!" Adam retorted, chasing after Kris once again.

As Adam caught him in his arms and pressed him back against the bar, Kris flung his arms around Adam's neck and jumped slightly so he could wrap his legs around Adam's waist. "I'd die happy." He grinned and reached one hand up to rip off Adam's hat and wig and tossed them onto the bar. "There, now, I can kiss _you_. The real you." 

"Oh, this is real..." Adam whispered as he bent his head and their lips met. He felt Kris' anxiety toward the day's events in the tight clench of his fingers on Adam's shoulders and the thighs around his waist and cupped Kris' head in one hand while bending over him, delving deeply into his mouth. He kissed him hard, thoroughly, until he could tell by the hard ridge of Kris' cock against his stomach, the rocking of his pelvis against Adam's body, and the little moans from his throat that Kris' tension had transferred into sexual need. 

"More... more real..." Kris groaned as he licked his way down the column of Adam's neck, licking at the taut skin, then suckling at an exposed collarbone. "More skin. More you, hurry, please..." Kris begged, tugging at Adam's shirt.

"You're so hot..." Adam whispered, his jeans suddenly way too tight as his cock responded to Kris' need. Pulling Kris' clothes off so quickly that Kris just raised his arms and toed off his sneakers to keep out of the way of Adam's hands, Adam then removed his own, pulling out a condom and lube from his jeans pockets before dropping them to the floor. 

Spinning Kris around to face the bar, Adam ran his hands down Kris' ass, squeezing him tightly, before lightly slapping Kris' thighs. "Put your feet on the bar rail," Adam ordered as he ripped open the condom packet. "Then spread 'em." 

"God, I love when you boss me around like that..." Kris moaned under his breath as he hurried to obey. The cold metal of the brass bar under his bare feet was a strong contrast to the heat pouring off the rest of his body and off of Adam's, and Adam's damn big cock that he had felt brush against his butt. He pushed back, eager for it, then swore under his breath when Adam's hand on his hip held him still. He held his breath, waiting for Adam to touch him, then gasped loudly when Adam's fingers spread lube between his butt cheeks. Slowly. Damn him. "Adammmmm..."

"I love when you moan my name like that...." Adam moaned in return, feeling his cock harden even higher at the sound of Kris' voice and the way he was angling his butt up for Adam's slickened hand. He had to prep Kris properly before he took him, only the way Kris was impaling himself on Adam's fingers wasn't making it easy to maintain control. Gently scissoring his fingers, Adam looked at Kris' face in the mirror, watching the sheen of perspiration appear on Kris' chest as he shoved back against Adam's hand. Pulling back, he watched Kris lick his lips even as he pushed his butt back as Adam moved forward between his legs. "Damn, I love when you tilt your ass back to meet my cock."

"I love when your cock is inside me. Take me!" Kris urged, gritting his teeth and lifting his head, gasping in shock when he caught sight of them in the mirror over the bar. Adam's beautiful face and his eyes -- so intent on him and oh damn. "Oh, fuck, we're in the mirror!"

"I know. Watch us..." Adam ordered as he angled his body and shoved inside Kris, feeling the tight clasp around him and then the jerk as he hit the spot he knew would send Kris flying. 

"I can't look away..." Kris admitted even as he let out one cry after another as he felt Adam surge inside him. The feel of Adam's body against him, around him, his cock inside him, the intensity of those blue eyes on him... he shuddered and gripped the hand rail of the bar in tight fingers while pushing back against Adam, wanting him deeper, deeper. 

"Look...at us." Adam stared intently into the mirror, watching the heat in Kris' eyes, then the surprise as he reached up and plucked at Kris' nipples, the surprise turning to even greater arousal, then more heat as Kris wiggled back against his cock, shoving and twisting to get closer. "You want it deeper, don't you..." Adam said in a deep tone, using his knee to push Kris' legs even further apart as they rocked together. "Look. See what everyone else sees? That we belong together." 

"Tonight..." Kris bent forward to bite Adam's arm, then raised back up, to arch his back and lean his head against Adam's shoulder, watching them move in the mirror. "I see... Everyone knows..."

"What does everyone know now?" Adam asked, bending his head to run his teeth along Kris' neck and shoulder, taking sharp little nips while thrusting inside Kris, knowing just how to touch his lover. 

"I'm...." Kris bit his lip to keep from screaming as Adam's cock touched the sweet spot inside him over and over and he nearly saw stars. "I'm yours. I'm... taken."


	25. Stuffing

**Chapter 25: Stuffing**

 

"Thanks for helping me stuff my turkey." Kris smiled over at Adam, picking up his hand and intertwining their fingers. Talented hand.

"Oh, my pleasure." Adam grinned and wiggled his eyebrows, then his fingers. 

Laughing, Kris leaned in for a kiss with Adam, lying next to him on pool loungers. He couldn't believe it was Christmas and it was so warm out that he was hanging out on a pool deck with his boyfriend, Adam Fucking Lambert. Okay, the unbelievable part was the Adam part. But he also couldn't believe that unlike last year's solitary frozen dinner eaten over the sink while -- let's be honest -- feeling sorry for himself, tonight friends and family were coming over for a meal and party games later tonight. This was a damn fine Christmas. 

Unable to resist the warm skin next to him, Adam trailed his fingers down Kris' bare back and over the curve of his buttocks, before sliding his index finger down the cleft of Kris' ass. As Kris lifted his ass toward Adam's caress, Adam pressed in and said, "It's not every day that I'm elbow deep inside a fine piece of meat, speaking of which, how about--"

"Yeow!" Kris yelped and jerked his body, nearly falling off the patio lounger. "No way, no freakin' way--"

Adam clutched his stomach as he laughed so hard he too nearly fell off his own lounger. "Oh god, the look on your face..."

"You....!" Kris opened and closed his mouth several times, unable to find the word he wanted. "You!" He dropped down on top of Adam, lightly pummeling his bare chest, before Adam rolled them to their sides and squeezed them both onto the same lounger, all while still cracking up.

Through his laughter, Adam grabbed Kris' hands and pushed them down, before sliding his own hands around Kris' hips and squeezing his ass. "Hey, get real -- you have to know that no way would I want to fist you wide open. I have a vested interest in keeping you nice and tight for me."

Sliding his fingers down Adam's bare back, Kris snapped the waistband of Adam's board shorts. "I have a vested interest in having you naked next to me, so take these off."

"No. We're outside."

"We're surrounded by a really tall fence --"

"The fence isn't that tall. It just seems that way to munchkins." Adam smirked.

Kris rolled his eyes. "Who are you, the wizard?" Although if Kris himself were the wizard, he'd give Adam confidence in his body, because he knew damn well what Adam's hesitation about taking off his shorts was about. "That fence is tall. And there are trees!" Kris protested. "A pap would have to be in a palm tree!"

"It's happened," Adam retorted. He looked up at the tree, hoping the angle would prevent Kris from seeing the truth that he wasn't comfortable being naked out there in the bright sunshine. 

Kris wiggled up against Adam. One day, he vowed, they were going to find some deserted island so even Paranoid Pete here would feel comfortable being naked outside and then...then he'd show him that he was beautiful, prove to him that truth. He sighed in happy anticipation and kissed Adam's bare chest. 

"So any other stuffing you need my help with?" Adam cupped Kris' ass again.

"I cannot believe that you managed to make a turkey dinner sound dirty."

"Sure you can." Adam kissed Kris' mouth, feeling the smile he was trying to hide in the upturned muscles around his lips. Good. No blue Christmas for Kris this year. 

Kris sighed, then surrendered to the smile that was always ready to burst out around Adam. "I can. You have the gift. Speaking of which...Thanks again for my Christmas present."

Adam grinned. "Oh, once again -- my pleasure."

Kris giggled and elbowed Adam's ribs. "Not the wake-up blow job while you hummed Jingle Bells, although that was pretty damn spectacular... "

"My powers of concentration are formidable, aren't they?"

"So's your tongue. I meant, the plane ticket for Cale. But..." Kris bit his lip. It was rude to argue about a gift given with the best of intentions, but it hurt his pride that the only reason he was going to see Cale was because his boyfriend paid for it. Maybe he should use... No, he had to be careful with money. He never wanted to be hungry again and damn, he sounded like a butch Scarlett O'Hara. 

"I already told you, I used my frequent flyer miles so there was no out of pocket expense for me," Adam said quickly. He had seen Kris' excitement at the news, then had seen him make a nearly visible effort to swallow his pride to accept the gift. 

"Hmm. Well, at least I _bought_ the Hanukkah wrapping paper," Kris offered.

"I did buy a game of Twister for later tonight." Sliding his leg around Kris' thigh, he pulled him up close. "I have a feeling you're going to enjoy that. When we're alone and playing naked Twister."

"Let me guess..." Kris tapped his chin, then reached out to dance his fingers along the freckles on Adam's shoulders. "Somehow, I'm going to end up on the bottom of a pile of two? With you right on top of me?"

"Why, Kris Allen! I didn't know you had psychic abilities!"

"And I'll further bet that somehow -- in some mysterious way -- earlier in the evening, Brian will have his toes or hand stepped on once or twice?"

"That does happen in Twister on occasion," Adam said in a sad tone, belied by the laughter in his eyes. "It's a risk you take when you choose to play that game." 

"I like the way your mind works."

_Ding!_

Kris jumped up as the timer dinged. "I gotta go baste my turkey."

"I believe I'll help with that." Adam shoved his hand inside his shorts and pumped his dick.

Kris laughed as he walked toward the patio door into the kitchen. Christmas had certainly changed from last year, indeed. "Seriously, dude."

"Seriously, _dude_..." Adam drawled back, standing up to follow Kris into the kitchen. "You keep setting me up like that--"

"I'm not setting you up for a fall--" Kris interrupted as he grabbed the baster off of the counter.

Adam blinked in confusion. "Hedgehog, no one said you were..."

Kris shook his head and smiled apologetically. "You're right. Anyway... why don't you take off your shorts and you can baste my meat..." He grinned and slapped his own bare butt as he bent over the turkey.

Watching Kris do... well, he guessed it was basting, whatever the hell that was although he should know after trying to tune out endless conversations between his mother and Kris over the last week about baking? Roasting? Cooking? the damn turkey and debating over whether to put walnuts or raisins or sausage in the stuffing... Adam shrugged. They were going back outside, so he wasn't taking off his shorts. "I'm busy watching you bend over." Seeing the slight hint of pink that might be sunburn on Kris' hip, Adam turned toward the junk drawer in the kitchen. "Let me get the sunblock. Lord knows, I should be using it to avoid even more freckles. Ugh." 

Finished basting, Kris closed the oven door and put the baster back down inside the sink. Washing his hands, he looked over at Adam and smiled at the long length of him leaning against the counter. He reached out and pressed his fingertip quickly against one shoulder freckle after another. "Angel kisses. I love your freckles." He did. He loved how Adam could be so fierce and glamorous, but underneath it all he was sweet and freckled. Well and sometimes both -- sometimes he was all fierce even when he was wearing nothing more than freckles. "Yeah, I love them."

"I think that's your fetish." 

"That's ridicu--" Kris stopped and smiled. Whether it was a fetish or not, his liking for the freckles made Adam feel good and that was the most important thing. "Mebbe so." Running his fingertip along Adam's arm, he looked back up and asked, "So. If you had a fetish about me -- which you don't since you're such a control freak and can control all your urges -- what would it be?"

"Hmm." Adam leered at Kris' naked body. "Turn around then bend over again, so I can analyze the possibilities from every angle. Naked." 

"You can't--"

"Do it." 

"God, you're bossy." Kris complained, even as he immediately turned around, then when Adam touched his lower back, he slowly bent over, moaning softly as Adam's hand caressed his ass.

_Slap!_

Adam laughed as he lightly slapped Kris' ass and Kris once again jumped. "You love it. Every time I boss you around and it's even _vaguely_ about sex, you get a hard on." 

"No, I don't..." Kris looked down and noted his erection. "Oh." He looked back up and shrugged. "Truth is, I'm generally half hard around you to begin with." 

"I thought that was just my wishful thinking." 

"Yeah., it's true. Because you...." Kris poked Adam in the chest. "You are the fucking hottest guy on the planet, Adam Fucking Lambert." He shook his head and smiled up at Adam's surprised but pleased face.

"I know what I'd write about..." Adam raised his hand and used his index finger to trace the edges of Kris' lips and his smile. "The curve."

"The curve?"

"Well, of your lips--" Adam began. He got distracted as he looked down at Kris' body, scanning from the curve of his cheek, over his jaw, down his neck and collarbones, over his shoulder to his chest. The curves of his body were gorgeous.

The intensity of Adam's gaze on his body made Kris blush. "I...I bet I can write a better song about your freckles than you can about my lips."

"Get real. You're starting with _freckles._ Huge handicap. No way will I lose." Adam rolled his eyes.

Kris ran his hand down Adam's shoulder and arm and shook his head. "I love those freckles. So... Wanna bet?" 

"Bet what? What are the stakes?" Adam asked, looking at Kris' hand on his arm, tracing his tattoo. 

"Hmmm...." Kris skimmed his hands down Adam's body and then hooked his fingers into Adam's shorts and shoved them down. Adam kicked them aside, then turned to open the drawer again and pulled out two pens. Staring at Adam's ass, Kris grinned. Snagging one pen from Adam's hand and slapping his ass with the other, he announced, "The stakes are... whoever wins gets to...uh stuff the other one."

Adam grinned and ran his hand down to his cock. Pumping it slowly until Kris licked his lips and reached for him, he shook his head. "Well, at least I have enough sausage." 

 

_Ding!_

An hour later, Kris looked up as he once again basted his turkey and once again blushed at the way Adam was looking at him. "Why are you staring at me?"

"D'uh. You're naked, bending over." Adam reached out and slapped Kris on the ass. "Plus I'm writing a song about your body. I need to stare at you to write _accurately_ about you. It's a real hardship being a perfectionist." Adam winked and slid his hand up Kris' back, then reluctantly stepped away as Kris finished with his damn turkey.

"You've been awfully quiet," Kris noted as he closed the oven door and glanced sideways to frown at the board shorts Adam had put back on. Resetting the kitchen timer, he noted, "It's kinda creepy. You're only this quiet when you're sleeping."

"I'm concentrating. You know how competitive I am..." Adam paused while Kris made a harrumpphing noise. Busted, if he didn't find a way to distract Kris from realizing that he'd really been worrying about what Kris was writing and trying to sneak peeks at his paper. "I am--"

"Not really. You're a perfectionist, but that's only being competitive with yourself." Kris cleaned his hands, then walked over to where Adam stood at the kitchen island where they'd been scribbling away. Sliding his hands along Adam's hips, Kris pressed his naked body against the back of Adam's. "You're just worried that my sausage is gonna get stuffed into your meat..."

"Not unless you get a stepstool." Adam looked over his shoulder. "By the way, I've got to point out that clearly you were never a slut if you're confusing the back of my thigh with my ass." 

"I need my stepstool!" Kris grumbled.

"Actualllllly..." Adam smiled. "Go look in the front hall closet. There's another present for you in there." 

"Another stepstool?" Eagerly anticipating using that stool, Kris hurried off to the front closet.

"Go." Adam urged, waiting until Kris had walked through the doorway before snatching Kris' papers up from the kitchen island counter. His eyes widened as he read. "Ah... Oh.... Oh my..." Kris' song was about loving and cherishing something a lover disliked and hoping the lover could see himself through the other's eyes. He felt warmed all over. Even if Kris was apparently prone to hyperbole. 

"So glad I have two stools now and --- Adam!" Kris hurried over to the island and set the stool down, before reaching out for his papers. He'd never before shown a real song to Adam and now that the moment was here, he wasn't confident that it was a good idea. "I wasn't done..."

"Done enough..." Adam shook his head and took a step back. "It's not like the turkey -- it doesn't have to be completely cooked in order to be digested."

"I'm gonna completely cook you..." Kris growled as he stood on tiptoe trying to grab his papers and fell against Adam. "What are we -- third graders playing keep away?"

Rubbing up against Kris' skin, Adam smiled. He looked down at their bodies responding to each other. "Awfully precocious third graders..." 

"Let's forget about the songs and have an appetizer..." Kris suggested, running his hands down Adam's shoulders and arms to slide his arms around Adam's waist and hugging him close, before licking the upper curve of Adam's chest, then running his tongue along Adam's collarbone. 

"It's in my key," Adam noted as he looked at the papers still in his right hand. The music was sketchy, but that much was clear. "Why isn't it in your key?"

Adam's fucking concentration, Kris thought with resignation. "How do you know my key?"

"I can tell by your voice." 

"I'm not singin'." Kris shook his head. If he sang, Adam might think he was angling for help with his music career. Plus, he couldn't take it if Adam didn't like his voice. And plus plus, even if the song wasn't great, he wanted Adam to sing and own the words he'd written. "I'd rather hear you."

Adam frowned. Kris really needed to get over his stage fright, the result of too many rejections, he supposed. Then again, maybe he had played the hand that he didn't want a boyfriend in the music business too well. "Well, then _hum_ the melody line for me."

"It's real rough."

"I'm going to get real rough if you don't --"

"If you think you gettin' real rough is a bad thing..." Kris pinched Adam's arm. "Think again. We all already decided I like it when you boss me around and manhandle me." 

"Okay--" Adam put the papers down and reached for Kris, then froze. Kris' accent had become stronger, which was a sign that he was either nervous or excited. It could go either way right now, but he'd bet... "If you're trying to push me into manhandling you so I'll forget that I want you to at least hum your own song, you need to work on your pushing skills." 

"I can do that now that I have my step stool!" Kris retorted, jumping up on the stool. 

"The stool is all you need?" Adam asked with only part of his attention. Kris had made noises before about wanting to stick his sausage, but he always dropped it, so Adam focused on the lyrics. This song though was a more lyrical version of Kris' regular refrain about Adam's body -- so Kris wasn't dropping this idea. He fidgeted and picked at the waistband of his shorts, then looked over, surprised when Kris' eyes met his at the same height. Oh yeah, the stool. He'd forgotten. "I... I... uh..."

Kris froze as Adam hesitated and turned toward him. He looked almost shy. Kris held himself very still and asked softly, "What is it?"

"I like this line about the net of gold and how it caught you..." Adam said softly, slowly lifting his lashes to look at Kris. Given more time, Kris could have edited out some of the many different examples of imagery there, but right now and as a love letter it was... perfect.

Nodding, Kris skittered his fingertips along the dark gold freckles that fell across Adam's shoulders, arms and upper chest like yes, that net of gold, he'd written about. "I'm glad you like it. It's how I feel. Yeah, you wear that glitter and I love it, but the natural _gold_ here... angel kisses... that kind of natural gleam matches the sparkle in your eyes and that's what pulls me in every time..." Kris trailed off as Adam looked down at the papers and said nothing. Licking his lower lip nervously, he forced himself to ask, "Is it horrible? Did I... Do you get that I really do love your freckles and your body? Do you or else I failed and--"

"You didn't fail," Adam hastened to reassure Kris. "I...don't get it, but I love it anyway. It's a good song."

"What do you mean?"

"The point is to communicate your feelings and you did that.. The song is very... sweet. Loving," Adam whispered as he struggled to make Kris' words compute with his own feelings about himself. "It works. I feel... loved, even if I don't get why you feel that way. I mean, those freckles are...ugh. And I could lose some weight--" 

"So you feel loved?" Kris asked, reaching out to cup Adam's cheek. He got it -- Adam believed Kris believed what he said because of love only. "Because it's more than that really... I need to know -- why did you put your shorts back on?"

"Well, if we weren't going to have sex, then...." Adam shrugged.

"But I was naked the whole time."

"And I appreciate that..." Adam looked Kris up and down and leered. "Because, day-ummm, boy, you're gorgeous."

"I'd appreciate it if you were naked too," Kris told him. "Because, day-ummm, boy, you're gorgeous."

Adam paused, then shook his head. He had his moments, but they required effort. Not like Kris. "Well, when I dress right and my make up is--"

"No, when you're just you. Naked. First thing in the morning--"

"Are you drinking on the job and still drunk when you wake up in the morning?" Adam teased.

"No. Because I remember seeing that picture -- yeah, _that_ picture -- and I thought you had a great body. Long and lean and...." Kris sketched an inverted triangle with his hands. "I thought it was... manly, with your broad shoulders..." 

"My stomach--"

"Oh. My. God!" Kris yelped, then shoved at Adam's shoulders. "Enough arguing with me. Right now, the only response you're gonna make to me is to say, 'Yes, Kris' or "You're absolutely right, Kris.' Got it?"

"But--"

"You'd argue with a fucking fence post!" Kris curled his hands around Adam's biceps and squeezed. "Remember last week, when you asked what I wanted for Christmas, I told you I wanted to be in charge for an hour? Well--"

"I gave you an extra stool. That's good enough--- Mumph!" Adam's voice was muffled as Kris impatiently took advantage of his height on the stool and captured Adam's mouth in a hard, possessive kiss. 

Pulling back, Adam raised an eyebrow as he saw the determination on Kris's face. His usual easy-going demeanor had changed and Adam was curious about what Kris would do next. He forced himself to wait quietly. 

"I got this idea when I was thinking about the night at the bar and watching the two of us and then the next day I was watching you look at yourself in the mirror and I could tell you were being way too picky -- I want to show you--" Kris stopped, then nodded. He hopped down off the stepstool, grabbed Adam's hand and pulled him toward the guest bath near the foyer, not far from the kitchen. 

"Why here?" Adam asked as Kris shoved him into the bathroom, oversized as were all of them in the house -- which was a feature Kris loved about it -- and shut the door.

"The mirror on the back of the door." Kris nodded toward the large mirror, installed by the homeowner from whom Adam rented -- he was an acting agent who knew his guests would always want to check their entire look before emerging from the powder room. And now it was going to be put to much better use, Kris decided as he shoved Adam's shorts down and kicked them aside. "Watch me."

"Watch you?" Adam asked, confused. He'd thought Kris would insist he watch himself in some attempt to overcome his so-called issues.

"Yeah. I want you to see that not only are you the object of my affections..." Kris smiled and stood on tiptoe to kiss Adam's willing lips, both of them sighing regretfully when the kiss ended. "But also... my very own sex object. And you don't have to wear tight pants or glitter or dance or sing. You just have to be you and you take my breath away. And give me nearly constant hard ons. So shut up and watch me."

"I wasn't saying anything--"

"I said!" Kris grumbled. "You're only supposed to say, 'Yes, Kris."

Adam pressed his lips together to keep from smiling and nodded. "Yes, Kris." 

"Were you about to smile at me?" Kris accused, putting his hands on his own hips, then moving them to Adam's and turning him around to face the mirror.

"I..." Adam pressed his lips together and finally shrugged. "Yes, Kris."

Sliding his hands down to Adam's ass, Kris pulled their bodies together. "By the time I'm done, you're gonna be _screaming_ , 'Yes, Kris!'"


	26. Feeling full

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 26: Feeling full**

Okay, okay, he could do this, Adam told himself. He deliberately focused not on his body but on his boyfriend. Kris was right, he should just watch him. Yes, that would work. Kris was sweet and cute and so damn hot. Yes, good idea. Watch Kris. 

Seeing Adam's anxiety in the way he stood so stiffly, Kris grabbed Adam's arms and held him still. He bent his head to Adam's chest and then lifted his mouth back up and surprised Adam by slowly licking the freckle on his lip, before sliding his tongue inside Adam's mouth and taking it in a deep kiss he hoped showed Adam how much he wanted him. When Adam relaxed and moaned softly, Kris smiled and pulled back. He began kissing the freckles strung across the top of Adam's chest. His eyes glanced down and caught how Adam's hands clenched and he doubled his efforts, kissing slowly and lingering over each freckle, hoping he could show Adam what he saw. 

The taste of Kris on his lips and the seemingly endless parade of firm kisses on his skin finally punctured the balloon of anxiety he'd blown up around himself. This was Kris. Kris. Finally seeing the top of Kris' head and not his own insecurities, Adam forced himself to relax further. If nothing else, Kris wanted to do this... experiment and it wouldn't hurt him to allow it. That was it. And the kisses felt nice. Sweet. Loving, just like his song. 

As Kris watched those hands curl tightly until the knuckles turned white, he almost stopped when he felt Adam take a deep breath and a second later, a long deliberate sigh releasing tension as he forced himself to loosen his muscles. When Adam unclenched his hands, Kris knew that was the moment Adam decided to fully trust him. Or probably knowing Adam, humor him. Nodding, Kris applied his mouth to Adam's skin, kissing and nipping at each golden circle.

Seeing the unaccustomed intensity on Kris' face as he kissed his way over Adam's shoulder, Adam tilted his head in his own attempt to concentrate and make sense of what his eyes were telling him and what his skin was telling him. He felt not only the love in Kris' touch, but the desire in his lips and in the hard cock rubbing against his thigh as Kris moved, clearly determined to at least try and kiss every one of those stupid freckles. 

Skimming his lips across Adam's collarbone, Kris told him, "My goal is to kiss every one of these freckles, then when I think I'm done I know I'll have to start over because I'll probably have missed one and I..." Kris smiled up at Adam, then stood on tiptoe to lick at the lip freckle once again. Sighing happily while looking into Adam's confused but hopeful eyes, he added, "I don't intend to miss a thing."

Adam knew Kris thought this was important and he nodded slowly. He wouldn't miss a thing either. In the mirror, Adam saw that his own eyes were wide as he took in the sight of Kris making love to him, his hands and mouth kissing and caressing until his skin warmed not just from desire, but from the realization that Kris was even more hungry than he was. Which was... possible? He gasped in a breath as Kris' fingers teased his nipples while his mouth kept kissing those idiotic freckles. 

Kris kissed down Adam's arm, feeling the fine tension in the hard bicep. Adam was controlling his no-doubt strong desire to take over or at least prevent Kris from lavishing this much attention on his hated freckles. "I can't wait to spend forever trying. And that would be... awesome because not only do I love you...." 

He kissed his way back up, slowly, kissing one freckle after another, feeling the hard, fast beat of Adam's heart against his hand, moving up Adam's neck, over his jaw, and cheek, then kissing his eyebrows. "You... The you I see in your eyes and know in your heart..." His lips moving again, back down the other side of Adam's neck, over his collarbone and down to his chest, pressing against that heart. "This heart, which is inside an absolutely gorgeous body. You're beautiful inside and out." 

Still nervous, Adam licked his lips as he forced himself to follow the promise he'd made to watch Kris. A golden net indeed, he scoffed silently, even as he began to feel encircled by Kris' soft kisses and stinging bites as he forcefully turned Adam around, urging him to keep watch in the mirror. Kris was... focused, intent as he kept going, down Adam's spine, then knelt and with a quick grin into the mirror, sank his teeth into Adam's ass. "Hey!" Adam squawked. Kris was going to get it later.

"Hey, nothing -- remember the rules?" Kris demanded, biting again. He laughed as Adam shot him a look that promised later retribution. He couldn't wait for that either. 

Adam pursed his lips and snapped, "Yes, _Kris_." 

Kissing over the curve of Adam's buttocks, Kris smiled. "It's amazing the way you can make _Kris_ sound like _Bitch_ without changing any of the sounds. Yeah--" Kris shook his head as Adam parted his lips. "I know. It's a skill set. And here's one I want to develop -- the skill to make you feel as beautiful as you are. Like this..." Kris curved his hands up and over Adam's butt. "You have the best damn ass I've ever seen and believe me, I'm seeing it up close and personal, so I know what I'm saying." 

One hand now on the door, Adam braced himself as Kris continued kissing him, sliding over his butt, then down his legs. He hissed back an instinctive protest as Kris shoved his legs apart, telling himself it was Kris touching him like this, Kris, Kris....

Hearing Adam whisper his name like a soft chant, Kris looked up. Adam's eyes were closed. "Sweetie, open your eyes. Watch me. Remember? Watch me." When Adam opened his eyes and nodded, Kris continued on his path, kissing down Adam's thighs, whispering, "I love your body, I adore it... I think it's beautiful and hot and sexy and sweet all at once... and I'm gonna show you just that, even if my turkey burns..." 

Burning? Not the damn turkey, but him, Adam thought a short time later, feeling the perspiration dot his forehead and chest as Kris' mouth and hands touched him everywhere, light touches against each and every freckle -- and honestly, he didn't know he had that many but suddenly it wasn't seeming like such a hardship with the way Kris was kissing them... 

"Spread your legs for me." Kris raised his eyes to Adam's shocked face. "Remember. All you can say is Yes, Kris."

"Oh!" Adam planted his feet and arched his back as Kris' lips kissed his balls from behind. "I don't have freckles there! Tell me I don't!" He laughed and groaned at the same time.

"If I tell you that, I'd have to stop kissing them," Kris warned in a sing-song tone.

"Hard cho---ooooiice!" Adam squeaked as Kris licked his balls from the back. 

"So I see." Looking up into the mirror, Kris smiled in satisfaction as he saw the way Adam's cock had hardened and his eyes had gotten soft at the same time. He reached up and tugged Adam down on the floor with him, then pushed him back against the wall. He looked Adam up and down, marveling again at everything that had come to him with one fateful decision. "Damn, I can't believe anyone as beautiful as you belongs to me..." he whispered, lifting his hands and lowering his mouth. "Are you watching me?"

Kris' touch had changed, gentled, his hands still strong and his kisses still determined, but with an undercurrent of tenderness that took Adam's breath away, as did the look of lust and love in Kris' eyes. He wouldn't look away for the world, Adam thought but said only, "Yes, Kris." 

"What do you see in my face?"

Staring intently into Kris' eyes, Adam saw the truth. "You... You want me. Not just because you love me, but because you honestly think..." He paused and felt his skin flush. Damn, he hated being a ginger and prone to flushing. 

"Say it," Kris demanded, sliding his hands up Adam's thighs before curling them around his hips and squeezing his ass. "Say it. I honestly think what about the way you look? C'mon, you know what I'm thinking, say it."

Adam knew that Kris knew he knew, but saying it? And besides if he kept quiet, what else would Kris do to convince him to say it? He bit his lip to keep from smiling, then shook his head. 

"Say it or I'll stop touching you..." Kris threatened with a grin as he quickly ran one fingertip up the underside of Adam's hard cock and watched it surge higher. Judging by the hardness of that cock, Adam wasn't likely to refuse the demand. 

Watching Kris touch his cock, Adam let out a long breath as he struggled to find the control to keep from pushing Kris back against the floor and taking him hard and quickly. Ah. He could control the situation. "I thought I was only supposed to say, 'Yes, Kris.'"

Rolling his eyes, Kris shook his head. "Way too obvious, sweetie." Lowering his head, he slowly licked at the tip, then engulfed it in his mouth, his fingers gently rolling Adam's balls in the way he knew set Adam off. Sliding back up, sucking hard, he popped his lips free, grinning as Adam's hands circled his arms and tried to pull him back. "Say it... What do I think about your body?" Keeping his hands moving, Kris pressed for an answer. "Those broad shoulders and long legs, those gorgeous lips, that big hard talented cock that I'd be willing to suck all day long.... What do I think about your body?"

Damn it, Kris was not letting go, not this time, Adam realized. His jaw was firmly set, even if he was smiling and his eyes were... understanding. He smiled without realizing it, feeling a shift in his chest as he gave up in the face of Kris' determination and love. He should just do it, say what Kris wanted him to say, because it was his truth. And as trite as it was, the truth did set you free or at least maybe in this case, the truth would set him free to take Kris. "You think...I'm hot." And in that moment with the need in Kris' hands and mouth and eyes, Adam felt like he was the hottest man on the planet, the universe needing to be no more than this room. 

"Damn straight!" Kris growled as he fell on top of Adam and kissed him eagerly and deeply, pushing until Adam tilted his head back and allowed Kris free reign. Sliding his hands over Adam's chest, Kris felt the hard _thudthudthud_ of Adam's heart against his palms. He pulled back to speak when Adam spoke first.

"Thank you, Kris..." Adam whispered, sliding his hand around the back of Kris' neck and pulling him back for more kisses. 

"God, Adam, I love you so much..." Kris cried out, abruptly moving back, although his hands kept moving as his heart overflowed as he saw the look of surprise and even, awe on Adam's face. "I just want... Wish..." 

"What?" Adam gasped out, pushing his hair off of his face. Kris had never touched him like this before, this beguiling mix of heat and tenderness, lust and love. His heart was pounding and his breath was coming so fast, he almost felt dizzy. Wrapping his arms around Kris, he pulled him close, feeling Kris wiggle against him as if he wanted to just melt every barrier between them. Holy hell, he loved the way Kris wiggled. 

"Wish I could be..." Kris rubbed against Adam, his cock sliding against the perspiration-slickened skin of Adam's hip as he settled between Adam's legs. Tentatively sliding his right hand down Adam's thigh, then cupping his balls and lifting them, he asked, his voice low and husky, "Inside you, you know?"

"You...." Adam nodded as he made the decision, an easy choice when someone was looking at you with that irresistible mix of love and lust. "You can." 

Staring down into Adam's eyes, Kris saw not only the love, but the trust. He slowly stood upand held out his hand. "Come with me?"

"I'll follow you anywhere..." Adam said softly as he vaulted to his feet while Kris opened the door. As Kris held onto his hand and led him down the hall, Adam frowned in confusion. "Where are we going?"

"The kitchen." Kris looked up at Adam and smiled. "I need to baste my turkey. And stuff my sausage."

"I'm starting to think you're more interested in the meat in the oven, then putting your meat in my oven," Adam noted impatiently. Why he'd ever thought it was a good idea to have a party at his house for Christmas so Kris wouldn't miss his family was a mystery, but then again he'd never paid attention to how much attention a turkey took. He tapped his foot as Kris did something with that stupid turkey.

"Don't be stupid. It took half a minute!" Kris retorted, rolling his eyes as he slammed the oven door and whirled around. Grimacing, he pulled off the apron and tossed it onto the counter. "I can't believe you made me wear a freaking apron."

"It'd be a shame if you got incapacitated due to a burn on a very special body part on this very special episode of the Kris and Adam Show, Christmas Edition." Adam laughed out of sheer happiness. This had been a great day so far. "Plus your ass was still bare, so it's all good for me." 

"You know while you were ogling my ass, you coulda been getting out the lube and condoms."

"You're the one in charge. You said for me to follow you and that's what I'm doing..." Adam shrugged and held up his hands. He held back a grin as Kris' hair practically stood up straight as he flushed with irritation and put his hands on his hips. Gods, he loved when Kris went all hedgehog. 

"Okay, sure, you're passive alright..." Kris harrumphed. When Adam just kept grinning at him like a Cheshire Cat, Kris sighed. "Where are they?"

"The lube and condoms are in the junk drawer. I think..." Adam pointed. If Kris wanted to be in control, then he had to take care... Then again, Kris had been taking care of him before. He smiled and reached out a hand to gently stroke the line of Kris' back. Beautiful. Outside and inside. Beautiful man. 

Caught by the happiness and love in Adam's face, Kris paused and stared up at him. He had really made Adam that happy? Unbelievable. His eyes slipped down, greedily looking at the solid strength of the naked man in front of him. That belonged to him. Oh yeah. He turned back to the cabinet and pulled open the drawer and hurriedly began pawing through it, shoving stuff aside as Adam's hand slipped down and began fondling his ass, then reached between his legs to cup his balls. "Oh hell! This junk drawer is like Mary Poppins' suitcase," Kris noted as he rummaged through it, finding a necklace Adam had torn the house apart looking for last week and oh of course, his own dumb phone. And finally! "Got 'em!" 

"Okay, let's go." Adam turned around, placed his arms on the kitchen island and bent over. "Get on your step stool and lube me up."He looked over his shoulder and winked. 

"Nice ass, but..." Kris hid his grin, then shook his head. Putting the lube and condoms down on the island, he gently urged Adam to turn back around. "That's not romantic enough." 

"You brought me into the kitchen and now you want romance?" Adam asked, curious as to Kris' plans. He put his hands on the edge of the kitchen island to keep himself from moving Kris along. 

"We can be romantic anywhere." Kris nodded, then put his hands on Adam's shoulders, feeling the tension in his shoulder muscles. Uh-oh, he'd better get a move on. "I know you're probably chomping at the bit to take over. But I'm running the show today, especially here in the kitchen." Watching his hands slide down over Adam's chest and stomach, he arrowed them in at angle, hearing Adam's breath catch as he circled Adam's cock with one hand. Stroking Adam's balls with his other hand and leaned in to begin kissing his way down Adam's chest, pressing his lips slowly against one freckle after another. 

"Are we starting all over?" Adam asked, hearing the husky tone in his voice and clearing his throat. "Because I ... might like that." 

"You bet. If once was good, twice will be great. That's a lesson you've taught me." Kris smiled and stood on tiptoe, pressing his lips to Adam's while cupping his cheek, gently stroking his thumb across Adam's chin and jaw. He scraped his teeth along the plumpness of Adam's lower lip, then licking the freckle, before kissing him again, over and over, before once again sliding down his body. As his mouth moved across Adam's skin, he felt Adam's arms lift and his hands slowly stroke his back, while pulling him close, as if Adam couldn't bear to let him go. He was wanted, Adam wanted him. Forever. Safe. He was loved by someone who would hold on to him. He lingered, kissing more slowly, hoping he could show Adam how much he was loved in return. And desired too. Kris noted with a grin that both he and Adam were rubbing their hardened cocks against each other, slickness coating both their skin. Love and lust and... Kris moaned softly as Adam's cock thrust against his abdomen even as he felt the hard pounding of Adam's heart against his cheek. He had to get inside him. 

"I don't mean to rush you, but..." Adam groaned as Kris' cock brushed against the underside of his balls. "Really." He handed Kris the condom and waited while Kris slid it on.

"Really?" Kris stood back and fumbled for the lube on the island counter behind Adam. He squeezed some onto his fingers then stood back and bit his lip as he looked up and down Adam's enticing but way longer body. How the hell was he going to work this anyway? 

"How are you going to solve the height differential?" Adam looked at the step stool as a hint. _This was Kris' show, this was Kris' show. He was not going to take over, he was not going to take over. Hurryuphurryuphurrythefuckup! Before the damn timer for the damn turkey dinged again!_

"I know!" Kris grinned and sat down on his step stool. "C'mere." 

"Okay, not getting this position..." Adam admitted as he stepped over to the stool and followed Kris' instructions to straddle his legs while standing. "OH! I'm getting this position now!" He called out when Kris suddenly bent his head and sucked Adam's cock inside his mouth while sliding his lubed fingers behind Adam's balls to circle his target, before gently pressing in. 

Feeling Adam's thigh muscles tense, then slowly relax, Kris used all of his knowledge of Adam's preferences to focus his attention on his cock. "Good?" Kris asked as he lifted his head and saw the mix of desire and impatience on Adam's face. He began to reach for the lube and smiled when Adam handed it to him. He was probably damn lucky Adam had enough control to allow him the control this time. After applying more lube, he handed the tube back to Adam and licked his lips when he saw Adam's hand circle his own cock and aim it at his mouth. "Oh hell yeah. Give it to me..." He eagerly resumed licking it, timing his ever deeper sucking to the gentle insertions of his fingers. 

Thrusting his cock into Kris' hot greedy mouth over and over, Adam groaned and braced his hands on the counter above Kris' head. "Your mouth is.. damn." 

"You're..." Kris bit his lip and blushed. "I can't say.." 

Adam laughed and pulled back to run his fingers along Kris' jaw. "You had my cock in your mouth and your fingers up my ass and you're blushing about asking me a question?"

"Well, that does seem ridiculous..." Kris admitted.

"Then again, physical intimacy can be cheap but point of fact, you're in my heart too. So ask," Adam urged, pushing down against Kris' hand, in a hurry now. 

"It's just... you're looser..." Kris froze as Adam made a soft noise. God, he hoped that was pleasure and not pain. He looked up worriedly then relaxed as he recognized desire on Adam's face. He had hit the sweet spot. 

"Oh. You make these occasional noises about being the pitcher instead of the catcher, which you were doing this week, so I prepare myself." Adam shrugged. "Who knew that this time you were actually going to follow through?"

"Oh!" Kris grinned in relief. That hadn't been so bad. Then again, Adam had this way... this matter-of-fact way of talking about the most difficult subjects and he shouldn't have hesitated. Even if Adam didn't like what he said, he wasn't gonna throw him out. D'uh, Kristopher. Adam was totally letting you in. Focus. "Well, I'd hate to be one of those guys whose all foreplay and no follow through. So..." Kris slid his hands around to Adam's ass and pulled him down. "Follow through." 

Kneeling, Adam curled his hands around Kris' shoulders and smiled as they moved together, fitting to each other. "Ahh..." He groaned as Kris slowly came into him, so carefully when it was clear that he was rapidly losing control. Sweet. "You're coming right through me, you know..." He whispered, watching the surprise in Kris' eyes. 

"Oh fuck!" Kris cried out. Adam was so fucking hot and tight and _ohgodohgod... It was AdamAdamAdam._ He was inside Adam. He was gonna lose it. 

"That's the general idea..." Adam agreed with a grin as he watched Kris' eyes widen to almost comically large size. He lifted himself up and then slowly slid back down again, watching Kris' face and feeling the tight grip on his hips. He was probably going to have bruises there tomorrow, but it would be so worth it. And it was worth it, having Kris inside him, seeing the look on Kris' face as pure sexual need was joined by surprise and wonder. 

"I'm inside you...." Kris whispered, his hands roving over Adam's body, wishing he could be inside everywhere. This was close, but not enough. Although... the way Adam was moving... "It's... I love you."

"I love you too." Adam sighed happily even as he bent uncomfortably when Kris' hands pulled his head down for a kiss. 

"That must be why this feels so... damn... good..." Kris groaned as he planted his feet on the floor and began pushing up, meeting Adam's movements. 

"Then there's the fact that it's tight and hot and your dick is being massaged by those inner walls and..." Adam smirked as Kris groaned and bucked against him. Kris had a thing about talking during sex, which he did too. Perfect. 

"Is this what's called..." Kris gritted his teeth, closed his eyes and counted to ten. He groaned again when -- damn it -- Adam squeezed the muscles in his own ass and Kris nearly crossed his eyes trying not to come. He suddenly had a much better appreciation of how much control Adam exercised and _ohfuckinghell,_ Adam did it again. Looking up, Kris saw the smugness on Adam's face and slapped Adam's ass in retaliation. "Damn it. Is this what's calling topping from the bottom?" 

"Well, technically I'm not on the bottom. I'm on the top and --" Adam began, forcing his mouth to a prim pout.

Kris burst out laughing, then buried his head against Adam's chest. "God, I love you." 

Feeling the smile against his skin and knowing it mirrored the one on his own lips, Adam slid his hand up into Kris' hair and held him still for a long, slow kiss. He had meant to have control, but the clinging pressure of Kris' eager lips and the wet warmth of his stroking tongue combined with the way his hands were squeezing his ass while his cock pulsed inside him, made his head swim, his skin heat and his heart pound with that combination of lust and love that only Kris had ever made him feel. Only Kris... Reluctantly lifting his mouth, but needing to express what he thought Kris needed as much as he did, "Show me. Show me how you love me this way." 

Oh! Kris nodded as he realized that at least for now, this time, Adam really needed him to show him. He might never need it or want it again and Kris had no idea when he'd want to do this again, but for now their needs coincided... "I'd do anything for you, Adam. Anything and...it's not like this is a sacrifice." Kris grinned and put his hands on Adam's shoulders. Pushing gently until Adam lifted up and waited, he suggested, "Lay back for me and spread those long gorgeous legs of yours and let me inside." 

Knowing he was blushing, but too happy to care for once, Adam lay back on the floor, the cool tile a sharp contrast to the heat from his body. He held out his hand and gestured with his fingers. "C'mon. Show me."

And show him, Kris did, Adam mused as he later held Kris in his arms as their breathing returned to normal. Even now, Kris was still touching him and kissing his skin, as he'd done the entire time they'd made love. No one had ever made love to him like that, the way Kris had done today, the way he'd made Adam feel the love in his touch, in his every kiss of every one of his hated freckles, that... Maybe he wasn't hating them so much any more. Not if Kris loved them that much. Not if Kris would kiss him, kiss every freckle again the way he'd done today, the way he'd written a song about them today. Today... what a gift. Today was the day he felt full of thanks. Thanks for whatever hand of fate had sent him into that Starbucks. 

"Kris... thanks...for everything today. That song and what you did for me in the bathroom.." Adam said softly, tightening his arms around Kris. "I'll never forget it."

"Thanks too. I feel..." Kris rubbed his cheek against Adam's chest. He still couldn't believe that Adam loved him like this, that Adam had let him into his heart and was keeping his heart in return, in safe-keeping. His life was full and so was his heart. "I feel like I have somewhere to belong."

"Always."


	27. Winning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 27: Winning**

 

"Where do I belong? Where should I sit?" Geoffrey asked as he followed Leila from the foyer into the dining room, just in time for dessert. Or perhaps the second go-round of food, he couldn't quite tell. He sat down his own bakery pie on the sideboard and sniffed appreciatively. He smiled at the variety of people around the table, heavily-laden with a mismatched assortment of dishes provided by everyone that somehow blended into a happy crazy quilt of abundance. What a feast. Hearing Kris laugh, Geoffrey looked up. Good, the boy not only had put on weight since the first time they'd met, but he looked replete with contentment and happiness. More to the point today, he clearly was not thinking about the fact that his Arkansas relations were not sharing the holiday with him. As Adam had said privately, cooking the turkey was a good way to keep Kris so busy he didn't have time to miss those people, especially with his BFF Lane back in England for holiday. He turned to say as much to Leila. 

Neil rolled his eyes as Adam failed to hear Geoffrey's question. Adam was too busy smiling at Kris while compulsively rearranging dishes on the table in some design only he could see as their mother chatted with Geoffrey.

Watching from under his lashes, Adam wondered if Geoffrey and his mom were flirting. Yuck. Time to intercede. He looked up at Geoffrey with a grin. "Sit anywhere you want. Kris is keeping his ammunition ready, but aside from that the positions are up for grabs." 

Neil whispered to Alisan, "He was too busy making great googly-moogly eyes at the boy toy to pay attention to his guest." 

"I hear that boy toy has excellent aim," Alisan retorted, pointing at the bowl of mashed potatoes set conspicuously close to Kris' right arm. The happy chatter of many voices around the table paused to laugh while Neil pretended to cover his face in defense. 

When Kris tapped the mashed potatoes bowl, then pointed at Neil, Leila shook her head. As if Adam couldn't take care of himself when it came to his brother. He'd already pretended to shove Neil into the pool today. But Kris' protectiveness was a nice change from past boyfriends who'd expected Adam to smooth their way for them and cleared little territory in return. 

Danielle tapped Adam's arm as she sat next to him. She noted quietly, "Hey, I didn't see you having potatoes. You're not on some stupid diet, are you?"

"Oh, I'm... stuffed." Adam smiled blandly, then kicked Kris under the table when he started to giggle. 

"You haven't eaten much since I arrived," Leila observed, making no effort to hide her own smile. Adam was too busy talking and laughing to eat, to say nothing of using his right hand to keep touching Kris in those little gestures of a lover that made Kris beam in return. They were both happy and Kris was a welcome addition to the family. Adam had made a wonderful choice this time. 

"I gave him a lot of sausage before you all got here," Kris quipped, with a smug glance at Adam.

Adam smirked. "I wouldn't say it was a _lot_ of sausage--"

"Hey--" Kris hissed, glancing around to make sure everyone else had gone back to their own conversations. 

"Not too much, not too little. Just right." Adam reached out and ruffled Kris' already messy hair and grinned. "I should call you Goldilocks."

"It wasn't Goldilocks who was just right, it was Mama Bear's chair and --" Kris broke off as he saw the gleam of an idea -- a very bad idea -- in Adam's eyes. "Oh no. You are not calling me Mama Bear." 

"Why not? After all, you did make the dinner and you did wear an apron--"

Kris gasped. "You set me up!"

"How suspicious. Tsk tsk..." Adam shook his head. "As you know, I'm _totally_ into gender stereotyping, so since you wore an apron and made the meal, you have to be the Mama Bear." 

"I do not!" Kris spluttered, knowing Adam was teasing him but unable to keep from responding.

"Probably not. You're my Hedgehog." Adam grinned, before wrapping his arm around Kris' shoulders and pulling him close for a quick hug. Rubbing his chin against Kris' messy hair, he laughed. "But you do fit just right." 

"That's what you said earlier." Smiling up into Adam's happy face, Kris nodded. He'd done his job right. 

Geoffrey nodded approvingly in Kris' direction, then leaned over toward Neil and said smugly, "I'm winning that bet. Adam's no idiot. He's keeping Kris. Kris makes him happy and he knows how to throw potatoes. I am so winning." 

"Speaking of winning...." Kris elbowed Adam as he reminded him, "You never showed me your song."

"Song? What song?" Geoffrey asked instantly. "Adam -- do you have more songs? Happy songs?"

"Later!" Adam laughed and shook his head. "Eat some turkey, please. Kris slaved over it. I've never seen a guy more interested in squirting a baster in my life."

Kris burst out laughing, then blushed as everyone looked at him, then Adam -- who, damn him, was looking oh-so-innocent -- then back at him again before they too began to laugh. 

"Adammm..." Leila shook her head.

"Well, bro, it's a special talent to turn a _turkey_ into something dirty," Neil said.

"It was a compliment!" Adam protested. "Isn't the meat moist and juuuuuuiceeeeeey? Kris worked really _hard_ on it."

"You goofball!" Danielle giggled as everyone else laughed again.

"You're the one with the dirty minds." Adam shook his head and touched his chest. "Here I am, all innocently talking about turkey and Kris' sausage... stuffing. And by the way, did you note his nuts? In the stuffing, I mean, of course."

Kris bent forward nearly falling on top of Adam's lap as he was laughing so hard he couldn't stay upright.

Watching Adam grin as he pretended to keep Kris out of his lap, Leila suggested, "Adam, take Kris into the kitchen and go get some ice cream to go with the pie. And stick whatever's necessary into the freezer to cool off."

"Pie?" Adam grinned. 'Or piehole or--"

"Oh no! Let's go!" Kris choked out through his laughter, standing up and pulling Adam along with him.

Alisan sighed "They're disgusting." She grinned. "Where can I find one like that?"

"Like what?" Geoffrey asked quickly. "Short?"

"Like one who will look at me the way Kris looks at Adam."

"Ahh..." Geoffrey focused on his sweet potatoes that Kris had been raving about since Thanksgiving. "E-Harmony?" 

 

"Hey, where's your song?" Kris asked, looking around the kitchen. Last he had seen the papers, they'd been on the counter.

"Oh, I shoved it in a drawer when my mother came over early." Adam laughed as he remembered the way he and Kris had scrambled to get dressed. And clean up the floor. Standing in front of the stainless steel refrigerator, he saw the blurry outlines of his own smile and didn't need a mirror to clearly remember the look on Kris' face earlier in this same room or the bathroom. 

"Thanks for today..." Kris said softly, wrapping his arms around Adam from behind. "This has been the best day."

"It has, hasn't it?" Adam leaned back into Kris' embrace and curled his hands around Kris', before lifting them to his mouth for a kiss. What a gift these hands had given him today. "And I haven't even given you my song yet." 

 

"So what did Adam give you for Christmas? Did it measure up to your gift to him?" Danielle asked. She winced as she and Kris watched the Twister game in Adam's game room from the safety of the couch. It was just the four of them left and she wanted to hear how Kris' Hanukkah gift to Adam had gone. 

"He gave me the greatest gift I ever got -- his trust," Kris blurted out, then bit his lip as Danielle turned and looked at him intensely. "I shouldn't have said... His trust issues..."

"No, it's okay. I know about those issues and how he's been working on them. WIth you."

"Of course you do..." Kris nodded. Dani and Adam were so close. It was only in watching them that Kris realized that he'd never allowed anyone to get that close to him. Fear had made him put up barriers. 

"Adam and I don't really have big secrets. Like say, I know he doesn't really like Brian but puts up with him so I don't get mad. I mean, he doesn't say, but I know. I also know that he thinks he's being subtle by _accidentally_ stepping on Brian's toes."

Kris gave a bark of laughter. "Yeah, subtle isn't always Adam's strong suit, is it?"

"Well, aside from subtle snark in 140 characters or less." Danielle laughed too. "Hey, I know we don't have what you two have, but it's good enough for right now. I'm looking for a good time, not for anything permanent at the moment. But I'm so happy Adam loves you and that... maybe more importantly, trusts you. It wasn't in his nature to be suspicious and cynical about love, so I'm glad you two bumped into each other that day."

"Me too..." Kris looked down at his feet, then back up. Seeing the warmth in Danielle's eyes, he continued, "I just... sometimes things happen for a reason, you know?"

"Sometimes they do." Dani nodded. Adam would certainly agree with that idea. She wasn't always as sure as he was. "And sometimes life is just random."

"Totally. But with Adam? Truthfully, I don't know that I would have appreciated the gift of trust or well, the gifts of patience -- when I go into that hedgehog mode -- and approval he's given me if I hadn't been thrown out a few years ago. I took it for granted, kind of, before but since I lost it, I now get that the love and trust he gives me -- that it's the ultimate gift we give each other and maybe that's what Psalm 27 was talking about. Well, that and the grace of forgiving each other when we screw up. I've been watching."

"What do you mean?" Danielle asked curiously when Kris finished his nervous rambling.

"Well...it's like Adam beats himself up about mistakes he's made. Like with those two guys or the AMAs... He says he's not embarrassed and he has no regrets, but truth is, he's such a control freak and such a perfectionist... What?" Kris asked when Danielle looked startled, then amused.

"Nothing bad!" Danielle hurried to reassure Kris. "It's just... I'm so glad you get that aspect of him."

"Well, it's kinda obvious." Kris shrugged.

"Not to everyone," Danielle disagreed, then shooed Kris with her hands. "Go on." 

"Okaaay. And I've watched how you and Leila and Brad and Lane and even Geoffrey don't pile on, even if his mistakes might've embarrassed you, but instead prop him up and tell him to forgive himself. Because that's what real family and real friends do."

"That's right," Danielle agreed. "What did you mean about that psalm?"

"Oh. In Psalm 27, it says a line about how my mother and father have forsaken me, but the Lord will lift me up and...I was waiting to be lifted up, you know? Then one day I realized I had to do it myself and...I made that decision to go into Starbucks and I asked Adam out and..." Kris grinned as he watched Brian elbow Adam and Adam fall to the floor, laughing loudly. He turned to Danielle with a broad grin on his face. "I think we need to get into that game ourselves. They're having too much fun without us."

 

 

"Hey, sweetie-- where's your song from Christmas Day?" Kris asked, two days later, leaning against the wall of the closet as he watched Adam take off his jewelry. Adam had done a photo shoot today and they had given him all of the rings and necklaces he had worn, so the jewelry removal was taking a while. "We got distracted by naked Twister after Dani and Brian left."

"I liked naked Twister." Adam leered in Kris' direction, then gestured for Kris to take off his clothes. He smiled approvingly as Kris immediately toed off his sneakers.

"So did I. I"m telling you, we should market that as an adult game for couples." 

"I highly doubt we're the first couple to have the idea of naked Twister." Adam placed the last ring in a drawer and shut it. 

"But we're the best at it. Maybe if we included an instructional video?" Kris laughed as Adam raised an eyebrow and stared at him. He shrugged. "Hell, I'd pay to watch us and I actually am us." 

"Get real." Adam gestured again for Kris to keep undressing. 

Kris bent over to pull off his socks and grinned as he watched Adam stare at his ass. "But the song. I still want to hear it. Remember -- the bet?

"Oh, I get equal opportunity at your ass?"

"Always." Kris grinned as Adam slapped his butt before running downstairs to get his song. He pulled off his shirt and tossed it in the general direction of Adam's hamper. Sighing when it fell short, he walked over and tossed it in, along with his socks. Adam did not like a messy closet. As he noted the intermingling of their clothes, he bit his lip and wondered if he should be the one to ask Adam about officially living together. 

Humming the tune as he walked back into the bedroom, Adam stopped when he saw Kris lying on his bed. Naked. His eyes roved appreciatively over the sight as he stepped closer, set the papers down and reached for Kris.

"Nah-uh!" Kris scooted backwards. "Look but don't touch until I hear that song." He pointed at Adam. "Adam Fucking Lambert wrote a song for me and I wanna hear it!" 

"Okay, okay!" Adam smiled at Kris' impatience. He knelt on the bed and began to explain, "So I'm thinking of this song in a sort of bluesy rock style--"

"You mean like Whole Lotta Love?" Kris knew Adam was still speaking -- something about an up-to-date idea of something -- but he couldn't hear him given that he'd started to sweat and his cock began to leak just at the idea of anything related to Adam singing Whole Lotta Love. He'd seen Adam writhing on those damn lucky stairs in Milwaukee singing that song and had nearly come in his jeans. If Adam was going to sing something like that, about him, kneeling in front of him, in touching distance when Kris had the right to touch him... Oh hell, little Kris, calm down. "Uh... could you hurry up and sing?" 

"Seriously?" Adam looked down in amazement as he noted Kris' hard cock. "Are you taking Viagra or something?"

"Or something. Something like my boyfriend is Adam Fucking Lambert who's about to sing me a song in private in our bedroom, so why the hell would I need Viagra? But I do need you to sing me that song."

"Apparently you do." Adam crossed his arms to keep from grabbing for Kris. "Don't touch yourself while I sing."

"But--" Kris gave a tug on his cock and pouted when Adam slapped his hand away. "That was my plan." 

"I haven't sung it aloud yet and need to work it out. I won't be able to concentrate if you do that. C'mon!"

"Oh. Well, then move it!" Kris rubbed his hands on his thighs, then seeing Adam's glare, slapped them on the bed. He clenched his fists in the sheets as soon as Adam finished humming and began to sing,

_Which curve should I take..._

_....I'll take them all..._

As the notes lingered in the air like smoke from a smoldering fire, Kris gaped at Adam. He had wiggled his way toward Adam and ran his foot up the inside of Adam's thigh as he whispered, "Holy...."

"Well?" Adam asked, still kneeling and taking in the sight of Kris sprawled practically between his legs, his chest damp with perspiration as he sucked in a deep breath. Kris had stared at him and not made one sound throughout the entire song, just stared at him like he was one of those Chik Fil A commercials Kris watched on YouTube. He'd better give him his critique _immediatamente_ or-- wait. Kris was looking at him like he was one of those Chik Fil A commercials. Oooh. Life was good. 

"Well." Kris hissed out a long breath and looked back up, wondering just how quickly he could rip Adam's clothes off. "That was... sweet and... hot. Okay, it was so fucking hot. Like sex on the floor or up against the wall because you can't wait one more minute hot. And you love the person so there's a certain drop of sweetness underneath that makes you more open, but it's the heat that really sends you over the edge." 

"Well, that's _quite_ the review." Adam raised his eyebrows. And well, that was quite the hard-on Kris was sporting there. Apparently Kris really did think the song was hot. It might behoove him to take his clothes off. He liked them and given the look in Kris' eyes, they might become a casualty of the song. He vaulted off the bed, tugged off his shirt and pulled down his black jeans.

Staring as Adam's body was finally revealed, Kris mused, "Although I think you cheated. Because this wasn't just about my lips." Licking those lips, Kris watched as Adam knelt back on the bed, straddling him, his arms bracketing Kris' shoulders, then bending his knees further so that he could rub their cocks against each other's. Moaning, Kris wondered what he'd ever done to deserve this. Because day-umm. 

"I actually said _the curve_ first.... so technically that was the subject--"

"Oh, you're full of crap!" Kris exclaimed and laughed, while running his hands up Adam's arms.

"No, I'm serious." Adam stared down at Kris and let his eyes touch the soft, smooth skin he had sung about. "I wrote about curves. Your lips, the side of your cheek, the curve of your eyelashes, the inner curve of your lower back, your butt, the inside of your thighs..."

Feeling his skin flush, the heat from Adam's eyes as they catalogued Kris body punctuated by his husky voice. The heaviness in his cock made Kris groan before he argued, "You didn't play by the rules!"

"Rules? What rules?" Adam shrugged. The only rule he was really big on was the rule to treat others with respect. Everything else flowed from that. 

"The rules--" Kris broke off as he tried to remember, but really? He was supposed to remember anything other than how to have sex after hearing that song? "We musta had some rules. And you musta broken them." 

"Wow, I broke some rules? That's soooo shocking."

"Shocking is...wow, this song. I've never... felt that way from a song. Or..." Kris rubbed the back of his neck to keep from rubbing his rising cock. "Sing it for me again."

"I'll probably change it a million times, so it's still going to be a little rough..." Adam teased.

Grabbing Adam's arms, Kris pulled him up close and rubbed up against him, then ground his cock into Adam's thigh. "I've already said I like it when you get a little rough. What do I have to do -- issue an engraved invitation?"

"I have no interest in engraving. Although you could get a tattoo right here..." Adam slid his hand between Kris' legs and brushed his fingertips against Kris' inner thigh, then the taut skin behind his balls and said in a low tone, "A tattoo right here that says, Welcome home, Adam." When Kris gasped and pushed against his hand, Adam smiled smugly. He pushed away until he was once again looming over Kris. "So tell me -- What would you _do_ to hear it again? Tell me, what would you do?"

"Anything..." Kris moaned. Oh hell, he loved it when Adam got demanding. "Tell me what you want." 

"Suck my cock while I sing."

"Oh fuck! Yes!" Kris nearly yelled at the idea, every muscle in his body tightening with need. "Is that a fantasy of yours?"

Adam smiled at Kris' quick understanding. Singing sometimes just gave him an erection, then he'd imagine being sucked off, then his erection would get bigger and... "Yeah." 

"Me too! That time in Milwaukee... I jerked off a bunch of times imagining doing it to you," Kris admitted. "I'm gonna come if I do that."

Seeing Kris' wide eyes that darkened with desire as his cock dripped, Adam nodded. Kris just might. And how hot was that? Who cared that Kris had been a fan? Who cared as long as he wanted him still? Perspective and priorities, Lambert. Because as if singing while getting sucked wasn't incredible enough, the fact that Kris had fantasized about doing it to him... Oh god, he better start singing and Kris better start sucking. "I'll take the chance. Do it." 

Kris moaned his assent and shoved pillows under his head while Adam moved forward, cock in hand. Leaning on his elbows with hands on Adam's thighs, Kris licked his lips while looking up at Adam's face, then moaned again when Adam traced the lower edge of his bottom lip with his wet cockhead, singing while thrusting between his lips, 

_Which curve should I take..._

"Adammmm..." Kris moaned as the song went on and Adam held his head in place and thrust inside his mouth, his hips moving in rhythm with the song, whose words were hot enough, but now the words in that voice and the movements and his cock And.... Oh god, he could feel the vibrations of Adam's voice all the way through his cock while he sang. The vibrations enhanced the sound of Adam's voice, oh hell, that voice, singing about him and what he wanted and damn Adam had the best cock ever and the way he moved and oh hell the voice and Ohfuckohfuckohfuckhewasgonnacum --

_"I'll take them all...."_

Adam sang out, his voice deep and husky, as he thrust into Kris' eager mouth and felt him shudder, then groan, moved his fingers to Kris' cheeks, feeling his mouth pull on him, pull the song right out of him, the words flowing through him like a river of sound that started in his balls and wound up through his body, the sounds vibrating around his cock as Kris erupted under him. 

"Too much..." Adam cried out, the swirling heat from singing, thrusting, being sucked and Kris' desire tightened his balls and sent heat slamming up through his cock, the torrent of need pushing through him instantly sent Adam over the edge and he spilled with a loud shot into Kris' mouth. Pulling back, Adam stared down at Kris in shock as Kris kept sucking and his body kept thrusting. 

Pulling back, then giving Adam's cock a long lick, Kris whispered, "Do it again. Only this time, fuck me while you sing that song." 

Feeling the stiffness still in his cock, Adam nodded. He reached over Kris and hurriedly pulled open the nightstand drawer, dumping it onto the floor in his haste. Grabbing the lube he turned back and stopped as he watched Kris. 

"Hurry, hurry..." Kris begged, wiping his hand through his own stickiness and shoving his fingers inside himself. "Take them all. Please." 

"You want me inside you, don't you?" Adam asked as he pushed Kris' hands away and applied lube, carefully inserting his fingers, forcing himself to go slowly. 

"I don't need foreplay. The song was foreplay. And then sucking you while you sang..." Kris rolled onto his stomach, got on his hands and knees, spread his legs and lifted his ass into the air. Slapping his own butt, he looked over his shoulder and urged, "Hurry up. Take me. I have all these images in my head from that song..."

"And I intend to make all those images come to life." Adam flipped Kris onto his back. He hid his smile as Kris immediately popped back up and so did his cock. 

Kris struggled to sit up, groaning as Adam's hands pushed him back down and his cock hardened even more. Damn, he loved when Adam manhandled him like that. Plus he did want to have Adam's cock inside him now. Reaching out, he clutched Adam's hips and tried to pull him down. "But I want--" Kris broke off as Adam shoved his hands aside and whimpered. 

Shoving Kris' arms over his head, Adam glared down as Kris pushed back. "Do I need to tie you down?"

"I--" Kris broke off his protest, realizing that if Adam tied him down he wouldn't be able to touch him. "No. I'll behave." 

"Well, not too much..." Adam suggested with an open smile Kris met with his own as Adam bent down and Kris leaned up and their mouths met in a kiss that instantly turned needy. 

Singing -- softly, this time, his music interspersed with kisses over chest and arm and shoulder, then sliding over the abdomen and hip, the inner thigh, then as Kris spread his legs wider and lifted himself up, singing softly before he slowly licked the curve of his balls, feeling rather than hearing Kris gasp and then groan, his hands on Adam's shoulders digging in -- 

Singing over and over as he rolled Kris over, touching and tasting and singing until he forgot where the song began and flesh ended with the sound of the music in his ears intermingling with Kris' moans and whispers and the pounding of his own pulse --

Singing, he finally thrust into Kris' body, hearing Kris cry out, then grow quiet as he waited, listening, his loud panting the rhythmic counterpoint to the song, until they all -- Adam, Kris and the song -- reached their climax. 

_....I'll take them all..._

"You took me..." Kris moaned in a breathless sigh of sound. "All of me. You've taken all of me."

Adam kissed Kris slowly, tasting both himself and Kris on his lips, then kissed down his neck, licking at the salty skin and smiling as Kris rubbed against him, still eager for more touches. "You've given me... all I need."

"I think you won the bet about the song," Kris told him, wiggling happily under Adam's weight. 

"I think we both won..." Adam whispered wrapping his arms around Kris and holding on tightly.


	28. Thirty-eight cents

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: PG

**Chapter 28: Thirty-eight cents**

"Uncadum!" The two Cherry boys screeched as they ran pell mell towards Adam as he sat with their parents on the patio at the Cherry house.

"Un. Cle. Ad. Am." Adam enunciated slowly and clearly even as he picked the oldest boy up and tossed him in the air, then catching him as the boy shrieked, "Uncadum!" at the top of his voice. Hearing a choked chuckle he snapped his head up and glared at Kris. 

Kris shrugged and held his hands up. "I can't help it if they have trouble pronouncing your name." 

"You just wait..." Adam warned.

"Is UncaKwis gonna get in twouble?" Riff asked, his eyes alight with mischief.

"He's going to get a slap on his butt," Adam said solemnly. 

"Uh-oh. We'd better go!" Riff giggled and pulled Kris along. 

Kris paused to grab the younger boy and winked over his shoulder at Adam. He was happy to play with the boys rather than wait for Adam to stop fidgeting. He could help him work out his anxiety over showing the new music to the label later tonight. Some butt action might be just the trick. 

The Cherrys grinned at the byplay and resumed reading the music Adam had given them, Scarlett singing softly under her breath. 

"Well?" Adam asked impatiently. He tapped his fingers on the patio table, then took a drink, then jiggled his leg.

Lee and Scarlett both looked up. Lee asked, "Why do you need us to tell you that these songs are damn good? You must know it."

Adam stared at his friends, then slowly nodded. "Yeah, I do. Can't I just want someone else's opinion?"

"Of course, you can!" Scarlett agreed, then asked softly, "But is that all this is?"

Adam sighed, then gave a small smile to them. "You got me. I've been second-guessing myself a lot, haven't I?"

Lee nodded, then waited for Scarlett to answer since she handled Adam's vulnerabilities better than he did. Scarlett nodded. "Yes. Which is pretty natural when you get played. But you know--"

"Everyone can get played. It's incredibly arrogant to think you can't or won't." Adam played with his rings. "What's important is how you respond to it. Like knowing when to move past it. And I am."

"Absolutely! I'm glad you are." Scarlett smiled, then tapped the paper before them. "The song you've penciled in with the title, 'Angel Kisses'-- that's about seeing yourself through the eyes of your lover and accepting yourself... It's beautiful. I love it. It's sweet, with hints of both doubt and sexiness." She looked down again, reflecting that it took strength to admit to doubts. 

"Good. Kris wrote this song about my freckles and well...." Adam smiled. "That was my response to it. I don't know if I'll use it on the album or if the label will want it. But I really like it."

"Well, I'd use it! I hope the label accepts it. For the record, I like all the songs you've written lately." Scarlett leaned forward and clasped Adam's arm. "Don't get me wrong, I liked the angsty and angry songs too and I can see some great video ideas in that one about fire-- "

"I could still use that flaming headdress in a video for that one!" Adam teased Lee, who shuddered.

Lee pointed at Adam and said, "You're gonna shoot your eye out!" They all laughed at the reference to the movie, A Christmas Story. 

"Okay, old man." Adam grinned and looked over towards the lawn where the two Cherry boys played on a swing set with Kris. He waved back when they both called out to their "Uncadam!" and then grinned as Kris swung on a tire swing holding the younger boy, both of them looking like they were having the time of their lives.

"But the style of these two songs is..." Scarlett sighed. "Warm. I like it."

Lee nodded. "This song, 'The Curve', I _love_ it actually. I like how you go from the imagery of your lover's lips to the curve in the road that takes you somewhere unexpected. Love the imagery." He paused and then suggested, "You know, you could make two songs out of it."

"I originally wrote a song just about the curves and planes of a lover's body." Adam smiled as he remembered Kris' reaction to it. "Kris said it was sexy. Really sexy."

"Then why not just go with that?" Lee asked curiously. "We all know you can deliver sexy on stage and your fans love it, so why wouldn't you include it?"

"I was worried it might be too personal," Adam explained. And he also wanted to keep the memory of the night he'd sung it to Kris for the first time just for them. 

"I... whaaaat?" Lee burst out laughing. " _You_ think something is too personal to explore in music or on stage?"

Adam shook his head. "Well, it's not just about _me._ It's about my feelings for him, but it's also _about_ Kris this time. His _body_ ," Adam clarified. "So I'm concerned it might be invasive of his privacy."

"Ahhh." Lee nodded. "You don't want to have him known as the Boy Body Is A Wonderland." 

Scarlett nodded. "And Kris is private. Except for his tendency to sit on your lap and wiggle." 

"Yeah, that." Adam smiled. "I _like_ that tendency."

"Yeah, the glambulge lets us know." Scarlett laughed.

"To say nothing of the smile on your face." Lee leaned back and looked at Adam. It was great to see him happy with a guy again and this Kris seemed to be the real deal. Lane's background check had said so and more importantly, everyone liked the guy. Even Hannah who didn't like anyone. And the kids loved the guy. Everyone couldn't be wrong. And... he was sounding like Adam at his most paranoid. Oh hell, if _he_ was paranoid for Adam's sake, no wonder Adam had such difficulty moving past his past. "Well, you could ask him." 

"I should ask Kris," Adam agreed. "And warn him about what would happen if I recorded a sexy song about him, his body."

Scarlett grinned. "I can imagine the tweets to you now."

Adam groaned. "Geez, I just hope no one does a Kris in fruit."

 

"Apple, Adam?" Hannah asked, pointing to the bowl of fruit on the reception table.

"No thanks, Eve." Adam smiled at their recurring joke, as he played with his rings. "Is Geoffrey in a good mood?"

"Sure..." Hannah stared at him. Geoffrey was always glad to see Adam. And Kris. "Do you have bad news?"

"No. Just news." Adam shrugged. "Hey, while we're waiting, could you do me a favor?" He smiled.

Hannah stared at him. Even after all these years, his smile was still stunning and disarming. "What do you want? How bad is it? Why are you turning on the charm?"

"I'm not turning on the charm. I am charming. I know that because my mom tells me so." Adam smiled as Hannah laughed. He continued, "You are so suspicious. It's no big deal. I know you have Kris' audition reel here. May I see it, please?"

"Geoffrey said you'd be asking for it." Hannah shook her head. Geoffrey did know Adam. "But can I ask why?" She scrolled her mouse to the correct file, typing in her password to get past the encryption. 

"He refuses to sing in front of me and I'm curious. Does he sing country or something?" Adam shuddered. "I need to know before I ask him to move in with me. Because... seriously. There are limits!"

Hannah laughed. "I think you'd even put up with country music for Kris' sake."

"Maybe. Maybe not." Adam bent forward to look at the monitor and groaned. He pointed at Kris' shirt. "Plaid. I already put up with the plaid. Isn't that enough?"

 

"Now what is this idea of yours to change the arc of your album?" Geoffrey asked. "I'm sure we _can_ convince the label to do it. The label has a good solid radio-friendly single already mastered and ready to go, so that can buy us time, if you want it and you're willing to roll quickly on a video shoot."

"I have an idea with flaming headdressses...."

"Yeah, surrrrre..." Geoffrey drawled in his best attempt at an American accent, sighing when Adam shook his head. He steepled his fingers together. Adam was kidding about the flaming headdress. He hoped. "But before I agree to to push for that time, tell me more." 

Nodding, Adam began his argument, hoping he hit all the right buttons. "I was thinking of what you and Jacob were telling me. That overall, it's too dark. And upon consideration, I believe you're correct. I was stuck in a moment, a dark moment. While that's appropriate for a song or two, an entire album of that type of music is way too... emo for me. That's not me and I'd like my album to reflect my totality as a person and artist. As well as to bring a positive message to others."

"I see." Geoffrey nodded and watched Adam carefully. "You were thinking of what Jacob and I said to you? That's the only reason you want to change directions?" When Adam said nothing more, Geoffrey sighed. "Bloody stubborn.... Okay, fine. The label will be very happy with this decision. I assume you have a plan. You always have a plan. What is it?" 

"I've been toying with the idea of re-imagining it. The idea I have is along the lines of pennies from heaven." 

"The Bing Crosby song? Or the movie or..."

"No. Well, the idea of the lyrics. I was home one day, screwing around with the Instant Streaming feature on Netflix and accidentally chose that movie. Then I remembered hearing Sarah Vaughn and Billie Holliday's version."

"Inner City did a totally different song with that title. A dance hit in Britain." Geoffrey paused. "But I'm sure you already looked it up. So are you thinking of covering one of those versions or is it just a jumping off place?" 

"I might cover the original version, but not a slavish copy."

"As if that were a question," Geoffrey scoffed. "You don't even do a slavish copy of your own songs when you sing live. So a jumping off place. Tell me more about your new vision for the album." 

"The album itself is a re-focus. I can use the best of the tracks I already completed as my starting point -- maybe about the first third? But I want to show an arc of... growth, movement toward light and positivity." 

"And love?" Geoffrey asked.

"Yes, that." 

"So this has nothing to do with Kris?" Geoffrey asked with a grin. "And how you met him by spending just pennies?"

"I didn't say that." Adam shrugged, hiding his grin. Geoffrey was the biggest gossip and a worse control freak than he was. It would kill him to be kept in the dark. 

"Adam. C'mon! You're killing me!" Geoffrey pleaded. "And not because I'm a control freak or because I want to know how we should spin it, but because I'm your friend and I want to know how your life is going." 

"I've learned some lessons about keeping faith with the universe, trusting in love, paying attention to the signs which..." Adam allowed his grin to appear. "Apparently in this case, the signs were found in a Starbucks cup and in a camouflage-duct-taped-box and a can of shaving cream... And a turkey."

"Good images for videos." 

"Absolutely, although... maybe too personal. I haven't decided yet. But I have a lot of ideas for the music and the promo. I've been working on the music actually and I like what I've done. I've been... inspired."

"I can't wait to hear the songs. Did you bring some demos along?" Geoffrey stopped. Adam had asked him to set up a meeting immediately after theirs with the label. Of course, he'd brought demos along. He must be confident. 

"Of course. I have about ten I've written over the last two months." Adam reached into his jacket pocket for his Iphone. 

As they walked over to Geoffrey's audio system, he asked, "So tell me more." 

Adam nodded. "Well, it sounds like a cliche, but I was lost in a dark place for a while and I found my way out. I want to focus on the positive." Adam hid his smile as he began, "Even if it doesn't work out with Kris--"

"Why would you say that?" Geoffrey asked sharply. "You just spoke of trusting in love and keeping faith."

Adam sighed. "That's doesn't mean I have to be unrealistic. I don't have a great track record in terms of long-term relationships."

"Ballocks!" Geoffrey shook his head. "Please. You just hadn't found the right person yet. You're not an irredeemable idiot like me with five divorces and scores of other short-term affairs."

"True. You need to watch it, Geoffrey. Soon you're going to be wearing smoking jackets and starring in a reality show with Malibu Barbie clones and spouting about the wonders of Viagra." 

"You're such a bitch." Geoffrey grinned. "But if I do any of that -- stop me." 

"Absolutely. After all, friends don't let friends drive the pathetic car." 

"Your concern warms the cockles of my heart." Geoffrey shook his head at Adam, then pointed his finger. "But, please. Take it from someone who made too many wrong choices. The key choice is to know when to hold on to the right one. My second wife, Theresa... She was the right one. I should have fought harder... "

"You've mentioned her before. What happened?" Adam asked curiously. 

"I made enough money that she didn't have to work and given the crazy nature of this business, it was more convenient for her not to work so she could be with me when I traveled. But the convenience wasn't worth the cost. She... Her life was too governed by mine. She was dependent upon me and that dependency made our relationship unhealthy. For both of us. I had too much power and she had too little. Lesson learned --dependency, even benign dependency, is a bad idea. We both..." Geoffrey winced. "We both ended up behaving badly. She wised up faster than I did and left. I should have fought harder, found a way... She was the right one and I let her go. Don't make that mistake. Life is a series of choices, make the right one." 

"Is Kris the right one?" Adam plugged his phone into the docking unit and waited for Geoffrey to tell him, since he seemed to be in a pontificating mood. 

"He seems to be!"

"I don't know. What if he sings country music? Seriously, that would be a deal breaker." Adam shook his head morosely. 

Geoffrey stared, wondering how hard Adam was pulling his leg. Sometimes it was hard to tell. "Do you have some real doubts?"

"No. I'm just torturing you."

"Bitch!" Geoffrey laughed. "Not that I blamed you for being cautious initially. "

"I was." 

"Understandable." Geoffrey nodded, his turn to hide his smile. Adam sometimes didn't realize just how much he -- or Kris -- revealed. Which wasn't necessarily a bad thing. "But don't let that caution keep you from reaching out for what you want."

Thinking of his plans to ask Kris to move in with him, Adam didn't think he had a problem with reaching out for what he wanted. He just didn't care for people telling him what to do. "You sound like my parents."

"I always liked your parents." Geoffrey adjusted the controls. 

"You have the hots for my mother." Adam rolled his eyes. "Give it up." Then he paused. "Oh no, oh no. Is that why you're always trying to be paternalistic with me? Because you see yourself as my step-father?"

"No. Because I see myself as your friend, you bloody dolt. But as someone older and wiser -- and don't you dare start singing that song!" Geoffrey rolled his eyes. "So are you going to keep the original title of the album or did you have a better idea?"

Pressing the play button on the remote, Adam smiled. "I was thinking of calling it, Thirty-eight Cents." 

'Thirty-eight cents. That's a visual..."

"I was thinking of the cover being pennies spread out. And maybe my face on the penny head... Or me in different guises, each penny different? What do you think?"

"Well, that way you get to use all of the different looks you'll no doubt want to try."

"A definite bonus. And we can do a tie-in promo for the fans--"

 

Geoffrey smiled as he spoke into the phone. "Jacob, I just rang off with the label and they have tentatively signed off on the demos Adam brought over. I'm sure your boss will call you later but I wanted to give you a heads up. We'll need to reformulate the plans for promo. Considerably."

"Why?" Jacob jumped to his feet in eagerness. "Did Lambert come to his senses and nix the depressing angry crap?"

"It wasn't crap, musically-speaking."

"You're right, it wasn't. But selling music has less to do with quality than image and you know that. The cd was the wrong image for Adam Lambert. Just that small detail. That and the fact that selling Adam as an angsty angry dude was going to create long-term problems, in addition to short-term--"

"Get over it."

Jacob sighed. "So, did he nix it? Did I win?"

"You didn't _win._ If you think Adam Lambert was going to change the focus of his album because his _pr_ rep didn't like it, you're mad. He has a new view on life, or rather, found his way out of the dark place back to who he really is and he wants his music to reflect that." 

"Really?" Jacob smiled. Lambert had just made his life easier. "That's great. I did notice that he's happier these days. Is that due to the new arm candy?"

"You know Kris Allen is more than that. Or if you don't know, at least listen to me when I _tell_ you that."

"I'll be listening to your moans when you pay off the bet we made about their longevity. Your flaw, Geoffrey, is that you are a romantic, even though you can't pick the right woman for yourself. And my strength is that I'm a realist. They won't make it a year and you'll owe me big bucks."

"Ha. I'll be winning that bet. But my point is that Adam found love again when he was ready to find it. You have to be in the right place at the right time. And be willing to follow the signs." Geoffrey laughed. "Apparently Adam thinks the right signs are thirty-eight cents. That's going to be the new title for the album. His theme is pennies from heaven. Run with those ideas and let me know what you come up with." 

"Hmmm." Jacob paused. "We could do some interesting promo with the idea of finding your way, signs, using pennies like bread crumbs for Hansel and Gretel, a game for the fans to find thirty-eight something or other... Wow, lots of options with this theme."

"That's what I need you to do." Geoffrey smiled approvingly. "You're a good pr man, Jacob. Those ideas were remarkably similar to the ideas Adam just tossed at me. You can be a great asset and a great team player with Adam if you keep your bitchiness under control. Most importantly, keep your comments about Kris to, say, zero because even if you don't believe in love--"

"Believe in the fact that Adam Lambert singing about love sells cds?" Jacob rubbed his hands together. "Oh, I believe in the power of money. You know what -- if Allen keeps Lambert happy and writing music I can sell, I'll give _him_ the same amount of money I'll lose to you on betting against him." 

 

"He's going to come to his senses, come home, and forget all this nonsense about being... you know..." Kim Allen whispered, looking side to side as she spoke into the phone.

"I don't think so, Miz Allen," Cale told her firmly, holding onto his patience after this long conversation only with great effort. "He's real happy out in California, seems to have a real nice boyfriend -- like I said before, I talked with him on the phone a couple of times and he loves Kris. And Kris, he's doing good. Has some friends, makes some money. Likes it out there. I can't see him coming back here for people to judge him."

"People are judging him because he's hurting himself! And now that he's in the magazines...with that boy who wears _eyeliner_!" Kim moaned. "The prayer circle at church has his name on the top of the list! It's humiliating!"

"Not for him. And don't take offense, but not for me either. Now, like I said, when I go out there to visit Kris I'd like to tell him you were wanting to see him again or talk to him at least. But I guess that's not gonna happen right now. You let me know when you're ready, you hear? Take care, ma'am. Buh-bye." Cale poked the "END" button on his phone, then ran his hand over his face. "Damn, I need a drink after that." 

 

"How'd it go?" Kris asked eagerly the second Adam entered his kitchen. He shoved the glass of wine he'd poured for Adam in anticipation of good or bad news across the kitchen island. "This is the new stuff you wanted to try, by the way." Kris debated then poured himself a glass. It wouldn't hurt to expand his horizons beyond beer on occasion. 

"Great and thanks. Geoffrey was totally on board. We went over to the label and they accepted them while we waited. They were really enthusiastic. And I had zero interaction with Jacob." Adam did a little victory dance.

Kris grinned. "Well, that's always a good day. It's really a shame that he's damn good at his job and has these occasional flickers of humanity. It's easier if the people we'd like to hate are just one-dimensional." Kris stopped and looked at Adam. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I think.... Jacob might be you if you'd continued down that path."

"I beg your pardon?"

"You know how Lane thinks the problem is that Jacob has feelings for you that are unrequited? I think she's wrong. I think maybe the problem is that he sees in you what he used to be." 

"How, why would you think that?"

"Dwayne. Last time I was in the studio with you, he was telling me that years ago, Jacob was not a jerk." 

"No shit." Adam shook his head. "Well, let's not waste time talking about _him_." Smiling, Adam grabbed Kris' wrist and pulled him up against him. "Let's talk about how to celebrate."

"I'm up..." Kris rubbed his groin against Adam's thigh. "For anything." 

Unbuttoning Kris' shirt, Adam suggested, "Let's start with a glass of wine. That I'll pour on your chest and stomach and lick it up. It'll be our own form of wine tasting." 

"I could get into learning how to do a wine tasting." Kris pulled off his shirt, jumped up onto the kitchen island and reached for the bottle. 

"I could get into tasting you..." Adam murmured as he bent his head and began licking up the center of Kris' chest.


	29. When you walked in the joint...

**Chapter 29: When you walked in the joint...**

Adam sleepily opened one eye, then blinked as he listened. "Wha... Ah!" He jumped off of the futon and tiptoed over to the bathroom, putting one ear up to the door. "Ha! Gotcha!" He grinned, flung open the door and jumped inside the small room.

"Eeeek!" Kris shrieked, flailing inside the tub, his feet slipping, his hands scrambling for purchase on the slick shower curtain. Again!

"I've got you!" Adam grabbed Kris and slammed Kris' wet body up against his own. Yes, indeed, he had Kris, all nice and wet and warm...

"You are going to be the fucking death of me!" Kris grumbled, holding onto Adam. Oh. Who was naked. And really warm. And tall. And all those freckles. Which was awesome but damn, the man needed to pay. He grinned, bent his head and bit Adam's arm. "Why do you always have to scare the shit out of me while I'm in the shower?" He glared, then looked away. Oh hell, had Adam heard....

"Because..." Adam slid his hand up Kris' back to his neck, then curved his fingers around the back of Kris' head and gently pulled his head back so he could look into his face. His scowling face. Adam smiled. He knew how to make the hedgehog turn into a wiggly puppy. He bent his head and nibbled on Kris' lower lip until Kris sighed and licked at Adam's mouth before parting his lips and tilting his head back farther to invite Adam inside for a lazy, slow kiss. Pulling back, Adam smiled again. "I like scaring you in the shower. I love showing off my handyman skills by fixing your shower curtain bar." 

"Pffft!" Kris scoffed. " _I_ was the one who fixed my bar." 

"How about you fix mine?" Adam raised an eyebrow and when Kris stared confusedly up at him, Adam sighed and shoved his hips forward.

"Oh! I like the morning." Grinning himself as he felt Adam's hardening cock against his abdomen, Kris slid his hands down Adam's back and squeezed his ass. He asked, "Do you have the Spackle?" 

Turning to the side and reaching for the lube on the edge of the sink, Adam shook his head mournfully. "No. I'm a bad handyman--"

"Oooh! There's an idea for a game!" Kris laughed. "You can be a bad handyman and I can be the irritated homeowner who makes you come back to finish the job."

"I see. You're going to be the homeowner version of hedgehog." Adam nodded, then laughed when Kris pinched his butt. Squeezing out lube onto his fingers, he tossed the lube aside, hearing it slap against the wall of the tiny bathroom. 

"I know, this room is too small," Kris noted, even as he put one foot on the rim of the tub and began stroking his cock while watching Adam's fingers move towards him. He sighed as Adam's slipper fingers slid over his balls, then teased his opening. 

"Matches you. But you're..." Adam slid his fingers inside Kris, gently moving them as he heard Kris inhale, then moan. Just as he'd thought. Kris was ready. "Just right."

"Get in here and finish the job!" Kris stepped back, tugging Adam into the tub with him.

"Certainly, Mr. Hedgehog. I'd hate to disappoint a loyal customer like yourself." Adam smiled, picked Kris up by the hips and shoved him against the wet tiles. 

"Make sure..." Kris gasped moments later. "Make sure that bar fits just right." He wrapped his legs around Adam's hips and his arms around his neck and held on tight. "Oh yeah, right there...." 

 

"Over here!" Kris called out, waving his arm frantically as he spotted Cale in the baggage claim area of LAX.

"There you are!" Cale grinned as he reached Kris. "Sucks being such a shrimp, doesn't it?"

"Shut up." Kris smiled back then flung his arms around Cale in a hug. "Damn, it's great to see you."

"Same here. It's always good to find out a friend isn't dead." Cale gave Kris a last squeeze, stepped back and held up his duffel bag. "I'm good to go. Let's go to the beach! It'll be like Weekend at Bernie's since I'm with a dead man."

"Ugh. I wasn't dead. I was... incognito." Kris pointed toward the parking garage.

"So what criminal mastermind did you take down while you were incognito? And how incognito could you have been if you're still wearing plaid?" 

"You brought something decent to wear for Adam's party, didn't you?" Kris asked, leading the way to his truck.

"Well, I thought I did, but I've been Googling y'all and now I don't know. I've seen the pictures. Adam dresses up." Cale paused and noted Kris' jeans and plaid shirt. "But then again, you don't." 

"I will for the birthday party. The paps will probably find out where it is and pictures will be taken. So I hope you brought something decent or..." Kris groaned. "Adam and Lane will make us go shopping and believe me, you don't want to go shopping with Adam and Lane, the two bossiest people on the planet." 

"Oh, I don't know about that." Cale grinned as Kris pointed toward his truck. "I could live with Lane telling me to undress." 

Kris laughed. He unlocked the door and climbed in, sliding across the seat to unlock the passenger door. As Cale got into the truck, Kris told him, "But it's not the first undressing. It's the dressing, then the undressing, the dressing, the undressing and worst of all, the debates! And then you end up in black anyway."

"The undertaker outfit?"

"Exactly. You end up in black, the first outfit they picked out, but they had to make sure, then they congratulate themselves on their first instincts while you stand there wondering why you just spent three hours trying on clothes!"

"Three hours?" Cale gaped in astonishment. "The only time you spend three hours shopping is for a truck!"

" _Thank you_ for getting it!" Kris nodded as he steered his truck through the parking garage. "Good, no paps."

"Hey, I was kinda hoping I'd be stalked by the paparazzi and have my picture in the Star or something," Cale complained as he watched Kris' eyes dart around, obviously watching. "It would give me street cred back home." 

Kris burst out laughing. "Street cred? In Conway? Street cred comes from who has the biggest truck or who nabs the biggest buck during hunting season -- which... isn't it funny how men get points for how big their stuff is?" Kris laughed again. "Adam would get the most points."

Cale blinked in surprise, then shrugged as he recalled how often any random thought that went through Kris' head came out his mouth. He noted, "Then wouldn't you get the street cred for hunting the biggest buck?"

"Yeah." Kris rolled his eyes. "Since I was all hunter-like."

"Hey, you said you asked him out, right?" Cale remembered. "So you were the hunter. You get the points. Frankly, I'm hoping my association with you get me points, because did you know -- a lot of girls like Adam Lambert."

"Yeah, plus they think he's hot and want to have sex with him," Kris corrected. When Cale looked at him startled, Kris laughed. "I helped out with his fan mail for a while to pay Adam back for a loan he made me. I learned a lot about what women think. It was illuminating."

"Really." Cale stared at Kris. "Maybe I could get a job reading your boyfriend's mail? For educational purposes." He grinned and looked around, bending his head to get a better view of the palm trees against the bright blue sky. "I could get used to living out here." 

"I'm sure if you moved out here, Adam and Lane could get you a job. Doing something. Lord knows, Adam should fire his brother, so that job would be open."

"Yeah? Then why aren't _you_ working for Adam, making music?" Cale challenged, worried that Kris had given up. He wasn't always the most aggressive person, so it wouldn't surprise Cale if he'd given up, but it would be a shame. Although... Kris had gotten those three music-related jobs back home, so when he wanted to get aggressive, he could. Ugh, well. It would probably make sense eventually. Most things did. 

Kris shook his head. "I'm... not ready. Plus I don't want his charity. He's my boyfriend, not my sugar daddy."

"Okay. But ever hear the phrase cut off your nose to spite your face?"

"Ever hear about Adam's last boyfriend who was just using him to get ahead in the music business?"

"Oh! Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you?" Cale shook his head. "But no, I didn't know. I don't pay much attention to gossip."

Kris nodded. That personality trait was no doubt one reason why Cale was here right now. "Gossip is big business out here."

"All those entertainment shows you said to ignore? And the paparazzi?" Cale asked. "Have they ever followed you when you're not with Adam?" 

"Nah. It might happen, but the paps are usually around when Adam is. I'm really not that interesting. Not that it's interesting watching Adam pump gas or leave a restaurant or go into the recording studio." Kris shrugged, then grinned. "Well, it's interesting if you're behind him because damn, his ass--"

Cale cleared his throat. "Hello? I'm here while you go into a fantasy. If you can get your mind off of Adam's ass, we were talking about the paps following you." 

"I hope they don't, because I can just see the headlines now!" Kris gestured, making a rectangle in the air. "Does Lambert's boy toy have a new tall, dark and handsome sugar daddy?"

"So you think I'm tall, dark and handsome?" Cale teased.

"Ewww, you're like a brother to me. But Lane might have mentioned it..." Kris teased back, determined to ignore that he no longer seemed to have a biological brother.

"Lane? Lane said that?" Cale asked immediately sitting up straight.

"Oooh, that got your attention! Just like that pointer dog--"

"You are not seriously comparing me to Tyler's hunting dog!"

"I'm not seriously comparing Lane to a squirrel, so, no." Kris shuddered. "She'd kill me."

"Are you afraid of Lane?"

"Being that I'm not an idiot, hell, yeah, I'm afraid of Lane." Kris laughed. 

 

"So what's the rush?" Lane asked as she and Adam exited the music studio for a quick coffee at the nearby Starbucks. She grinned as she always did when the entered, remembering the day Kris had stood in front of them in line and life had changed. Not just for Adam, but for the people who loved him as well. 

"I'd really like to get this track laid down at a reasonable time today so I can meet Kris' friend tonight," Adam told her as they stood in line. "Kris has to work tonight so he can get time off for my birthday party, so Cale is going to hang out at the bar. I thought it would be a good idea to spend time with Cale at the bar tonight. Keep him company."

"Interrogate him."

"Of course not!" Adam scoffed. Damn, Lane knew him too well. He'd made a mistake telling her that he'd finally gotten over his fear of being used and listened to Kris' demo. 

"Ha! You want to find out about Kris' music from him. And make sure he's not a wolf in sheep's clothing and acting as an emissary from the Allens." Lane stared up at Adam. She'd met Cale and knew he wasn't the type to plan a sneak attack, but Adam didn't yet and it wasn't unreasonable of him to worry about Kris' well-being when with anyone from Gopher Flats. So yes, he wasn't being paranoid -- finally. Finally, he seemed to have moved past it. 

"Of course not! I'm neither nosy nor overprotective..." Adam trailed off as Lane burst out laughing. "I hate you. Actualllllly....I want to find out about this Little Mr. Little Rock contest." 

Lane paused, then nodded. "Actualllly... so do I. It sounds like perfect material to tease Kris to death over. And watch him go all hedgehog."

"That is the thrill of my life these days." 

Lane pursed her lips and moved her gaze from Adam's face to his arms, bare below the short sleeves of his shirt. "Given the fingerprint shaped bruises on your arms and is that a bite mark? I'm not thinking watching Kris go all hedgehog is the thrill of your life these days."

Adam glanced down, cursing his fair skin, then looked back up with a smirk. "Who says that those bruises aren't from Kris going all hedgehog?"

 

"Don't forget you still owe my brother a show at his coffeehouse," John told Kris with a frown as he listened to Cale and Kris talk about some gig Kris had done back in Arkansas.

"Okay, okay!" Kris grumbled as he pulled a glass out.

"What's up?" Cale asked, looking from Kris to John as he sat at the bar.

John pointed at Kris. "My brother gave Kris a futon and in exchange Kris was supposed to sing at this coffeehouse, but Kris has been avoiding it."

"I have not! I've been busy!" Kris snapped.

"Busy avoiding doing the gig." John pressed the point and glared back. "Adam says--"

"Adam says what?" Kris asked suspiciously.

Cale's mouth dropped open. The Kris he knew would have never turned down a chance to sing. Or been this prickly with a friend. What was this about? 

John shrugged. "That you need to get back up on the horse. That's it."

"That's it?" Kris glared suspiciously at John. Since when did John and Adam have conversations about his singing? Oh, wait. That piano idea of Adam's. "That's it? Adam never has that little to say!" 

"Well, if Adam's _always_ having a conversation, then you must suck in bed." John grinned, pleased with his joke. 

"Me? I suck plenty and..." Kris trailed off as he saw the shock on Cale's face. "Uh...sorry." 

Cale blinked and shook his head. Mrs. Allen had wanted him to somehow convince Kris to come back home and be "her son, her good boy" again. Which was ridiculous. In contrast, Lane had warned him all those months ago that if he really intended to be Kris' friend, he had to accept Kris as he was now. Now that he was out here, he saw Lane's point. Kris had changed living in a place where he was accepted for who he really was or maybe not changed so much as pulled back the layers. "Hey, it's cool. Guys joke about sex and you're gay, so you joke about it that way. I need to get used to it. It's just you never joked about sex before, because..." He stopped, then nodded. "I guess, this is the real you, isn't it? Now that you don't have to hide any longer."

Kris pulled another beer for Cale and slid it in front of him as he thought, feeling Cale and John's gazes on him. "Wellll.... I don't know.... I am more comfortable out here, especially now that I have my own friends and family. But I did change being on my own. I probably got more aggressive than I would have if I could have been myself back in Conway..."

"Probably more prickly." John laughed as Kris snapped him with a towel. "Adam calls him hedgehog, but I think porcupine is better."

"I dunno. Prick might work too," Cale teased, even as he realized that Kris did not refer to Conway as home. And that he was referring to folks out here not just as friends, but as family. If the Allens didn't get their bigoted butts in gear, they might really lose their oldest son. He wasn't sure that would be the worst thing for Kris, maybe it was for the best. Yeah, judging by what an asshole Kris' brother was turning into -- a carbon copy of his old man -- maybe it was best that Kris stay out here. 

Kris froze. "Am I being a prick?" Good god, he did not want to turn into his father or brother in any way. 

"A little one." Cale grinned. "Proportionate to your size -- Hey!" He laughed as Kris threw an olive at him. Kris had told him that he'd become tougher and more aggressive to make his way, to survive. As Kris smiled apologetically at him before moving off to pour a beer for another customer who'd called out to him, Cale watched and wondered about the way Kris had glossed over what he called the 'hard times' before he'd met Adam. 

"So is your boyfriend coming by tonight?" The customer asked Kris.

"Yeah, why?" 

"My daughter gave me pictures of two prom dresses and wants his opinion." 

"Oh, sure." Kris nodded. "I thought you didn't like her date?"

As Kris and the customer chatted, Cale sipped his beer and watched. This Kris was the guy he knew -- friendly, low-key, able to make easy conversation. The other Kris was a guy he was going to have to get to know. Along with the boyfriend. "So, does Adam come in here a lot? Doesn't look like his kinda place..." Cale nodded around the nondescript bar, that he could only describe as being brown.

"He comes in a lot actually," John told him. "I think in the beginning it was to watch out for Kris and now I think he knows Kris is safe here and he just comes to spend time with Kris since their schedules are kind of opposite each other." 

"Do..." Cale leaned forward and spoke softly. "Do the guys in the bar give him or Kris problems? You know -- for being gay?"

"Kris, he's a good bartender, good listener, people liked him. And the last few months, he's loosened up, let us see who he _really_ is and we all know him now. He's a really likable guy. Adam brings out the funny in him too. Happy to call him my friend. But, have you met Adam yet?" John asked.

"No, why?" Cale asked, wondering where John was going with his train of thought. 

"Adam is .... People _like_ him. Even though he has no interest in sports. No interest."

"No interest in sports?" Cale looked at Kris, who had moments of being a nut about sports. If Adam and Kris didn't talk about sports... Oh. Music. "So what do you talk to him about?"

"Almost anything else. Although you might want to read up on astrology -- he's real big on astrology." John laughed. "He's got a bunch of the regulars checking their horoscopes now. What a hoot." 

"Seriously?"

"Oh yeah. He's real persuasive." John looked at Cale and sighed. "Fact is, he's hard to describe. Funny, nice guy. Real nice. Kris -- when he's not falling on his ass laughing with Adam -- he calls him sweetie. But anyone who thinks that if he punched you that you wouldn't stay punched is kidding themselves. It's kinda funny actually, watching him try not to overprotect Kris. And he can protect, you know? He's a tall dude. Big guy. Truth is guys are less likely to try to push around someone who can push their face into the wall. Am I right?"

Cale nodded. "Yeah. I see it with my friends. I'm less likely to get grief than some of my shorter friends." He froze. "Wait-- so Kris..." 

"A couple of guys made comments," Kris admitted, having overheard the last bit of the conversation as he returned to his friend. "Nothing compared to what I've heard back in Arkansas. Nothing like." When Cale's head snapped up, Kris looked at him, knowing they were both thinking of Neil Allen. Kris shook his head and continued, "Just kind of jerky. I didn't even really notice. But John here -- the biggest busybody west of Pearline -- shut them down right quick. Thanks again, John," Kris said gruffly. "I'm sorry I got prickly." 

John held up his hands. "Whatever. You just need to get back on the stage and the coffeehouse is nice and small. But here -- Nobody gave you grief and you just didn't tell me, did they?"

"Nah... I dunno... after a while, they just seemed to get over it." Kris shrugged. "I don't know why, if they just got used to it or what and it took more energy to be jerky so they dropped it."

John said, "I think the deal is that it's hard to have issues when you know and like someone, isn't it? Like if some of the guys had ideas about Adam Lambert--"

"That's Adam Fucking Lambert," Kris corrected with a grin.

Cale laughed.

"No, seriously. When Adam walks into a room, people notice. Even when he's not in glam mode." Kris smiled. "You just notice him." 

"When you walked in the joint..." Cale began to sing, then thumped his palms on the bar in time to the music. 

Automatically picking up on a song, as he'd done so many times with his old friend in so many bars, Kris thumped his own hands on the bar and began to sing. "Baaadooom! I could tell you were a man of distinction..."

"A real big spender..."

"Good looking, so refined..." Kris rolled his eyes. Refined, yeah, that was Adam tonight when he was no doubt going to show in one of his ridiculous disguises. 

"Say, wouldn't you like to know --" Cale grinned at Kris' silly expressions. 

"What's going on in my mind?"

"So, let me get right to the point..." Cale pointed at Kris, who'd be able to nail the next line.

"I don't pop my cork for every guy I seeeeeee!" Kris sang, then seeing the shock on everyone's face, shut his mouth abruptly.

"You're gonna pop your cork for this guy, though..." John grinned as he motioned towards the door. 

Cale turned toward the door as he heard a few voices call out, "Dusty!" and wondered who the tall guy was with the truly heinous mullet and trucker's hat with rhinestones coming their way.


	30. I could tell you were a man of distinction, a real big spender, good looking, so refined...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating: PG-15

**Chapter 30:  
I could tell you were a man of distinction**

 

Kris shook his head. Had Adam been trying to fool the paparazzi or was he playing some sort of joke? Or -- oh, who knew? Sometimes he just didn't understand the paths Adam's mind took. Like why he thought it was so damn funny to burst in on Kris in the shower. Then again, the shower was one of his favorite places, although Adam's shower was way better and--

"Do you need to take a shower or something?" John asked, wondering why Kris was mumbling about showers.

"Uh, never mind..." Kris felt himself blush. As Cale winked knowingly, Kris swatted at him, then looked up with a grin as Adam finished greeting some guys and walked over with an equally wide smile. As Adam sat down on the stool next to Cale, Kris smiled and gestured, "Cale, this is--"

"Dusty. I heard." Cale nodded and smiled at the newcomer, who must be popular. "Hi, nice to meet you."

Adam smiled slowly and gave a triumphant glance in Kris' direction. Ha! Kris thought the Dusty disguise was ridiculous, but it had fooled Cale. He lowered his voice to a deeper register and nodded. "Pleased to meet ya."

"Ohmigod, he doesn't recognize Adam? He's just as bad as I was." John chortled as he leaned close to Kris. He looked around the immediate area and all of the regulars looked like their night had just gotten way better. Adam was damn entertaining. 

"Don't even." Kris closed his eyes and bit his lip. Just how many beers had he poured for Cale tonight? He slowly opened his eyes and looked carefully at Adam, who was -- in his opinion -- quite clearly Adam. Adam who looked way too amused for anyone's good. Ooh boy. Here we go. 

Cale gestured around the bar. "It was like an episode of that old show, Cheers, when everyone would call out, 'Norm', when you walked in the joint. So I guess you're a regular?"

"You betcha. Mah repudasheeun exceeds me." Adam glanced up at Kris and winked, ignoring John's choked laughter as he buried his head in the ice bin. "And you must be new. Judging by your accent, you seem to hale from Kris' part of the world. What's the name of that town again... Gopher Flats? Petticoat Junction? ToadSuck?" 

"Conway. I'm an old friend of Kris', out here visiting." Cale snatched his beer away from Kris, who for some reason had been trying to take it. He stared at Kris, who just looked... weird and his mouth was all pursed up like he'd eaten a crabapple or something like he did on that dare when they were kids. He held his beer to his chest and turned back to Dusty and asked, "I hear an accent in your voice too? Where're you from?" 

"Texasss." Adam pulled his hat down further on his head, praying his wig would stay put. "So, an old friend of Kris? Hmm. I bet you have tons of good dirt on him."

"You bet!" Cale nodded eagerly as he ignored Kris' pouting face and grinned at Dusty. Who looked familiar, but....

"No, you don't," Kris said quickly. He mouthed, "Unfair!" in Adam's direction.

Adam grinned and shrugged. Kris had known all of his secrets after the first party he'd attended with Adam's friends. To say nothing of the horrible pictures his mother had shown Kris one day during what he called the great turkey remedial class. "Now, I hear tell that Kris once upon a time saaang for a living?"

"Yes, sirree." Cale nodded. "If you had been here two minutes earlier then you would have actually heard him singing."

Adam pounced. "Oh really? What song?" 

"Oh shit." Kris groaned, ignoring John's chuckle -- evil chuckle -- behind him. Adam had been making noises about wanting to hear Kris sing for a while now and it had intensified in the last week. If Adam found out that he'd sung in the bar, even for a moment... He bent his head and peered up under the bill of Adam's hat. Oh shit. Determination was on Adam's face. "I'm not ready. I got rejected too many times."

"We're all fraaands here," Adam began when Cale jumped in.

Pointing his glass in Kris' direction, Cale nodded. "Dusty here's right. No one's gonna judge you. Besides, even if you suck, so what? I mean you recovered from that Little Mr. Little Rock Contest at school back in the day."

"Little Mr. Little Rock Contest?" John asked. "Okay, I gotta know--"

"No, you don't!" Kris exclaimed. "I see a group that wants another round. Way back behind the pool table."

John looked toward the pool table. "Nope. They look fine to me." 

"Me too!" The guy who'd wanted to show Adam his daughter's prom dress choices chimed in. He grinned when Kris slanted him a dirty look. 

"Me too." Adam shrugged and turned back to Cale. "So Kris recovered from this boy beauty pageant? What was his mama thinking putting him in that sorta shindig?"

"Shindig?" Kris moaned and picked up a cherry and bit down hard. 

"Miz Allen thought her lil boy was the cutest thing eva!" Cale laughed at the look of disgust on Kris' face. "Kris' picture was in the paper and everything."

"Oh really?" Adam grinned. "So if we Googled it--"

"Nope, not there." Kris shook his head. "It's not like some local Arkansas paper has uploaded their back issues to the web, you know." And thank god for small favors.

"Doesn't matter. Miz Allen has the pictures and clippings in her scrapbook." Cale nodded. "But seriously, dude, we tormented you about that contest and you survived. And look at your boyfriend -- he went right from that AMA thing to performing again. I remember, because you talked about it non-stop at the time." Cale rolled his eyes. Why everyone hadn't known Kris was gay amazed him. Then again, the south had a long history of "bachelor" sons living with their mommas. Come to think of it... that might have been Kris' fate if he'd stayed back in Conway. Maybe... Kris was meant to be out here. Where he could find someone to love, make a family of his own. Yup. He just needed to get back to music. "You need to get over your stage fright, if that's what it is. You can't be afraid of rejection -- hey, if you'd been afraid, you never would've asked Adam out and where would you be? You need to work on it, man. Am I right?" He turned to Dusty. 

"I hear tell," Adam began. "That stage fright is like riding ma horse -- you jest gotta get back on the sucker and ride it out." He looked at Kris. 

"Ride. It. Out." Kris shook his head.

Adam nodded. "Riding is a good thing. With a saddle or bareback. I like the bareback style I've been trying lately."

"Bareback?" Cale whistled. "That's hard."

"It's better when it's hard," Adam noted. He bit his lip as Kris bent over and choked noises seemed to come from the floor area. "I mean I like a challenge. Like say, when you have to break a horse to being ridden properly---" 

John nodded and prompted, "You know a lot about riding?"

"I know how to ride. Mounting is the key. A firm hand and a solid grip of the thighs. Once I'm firmly on ma mount, nuthin' dislodges me. I stay seated. On top. Givin' a good riiiiide." 

"Nuthin'?" John echoed when Kris looked as though he might give himself a hernia from the way he was bent over and holding in his laughter. He kneed him in the butt and Kris stumbled forward, then stood up.

"Nuthin'. It's all in the legs." Adam slapped his thigh. "You gotta have the strong legs. Stamina too." 

"Stamina..." Kris groaned. He was about to lose it. 

"You know all about that, doncha, Kris?" Adam grinned. "Me and my stamina. In fact the last time we went riding together you paid me a compliment about--"

"Oh god!" Kris burst out laughing. 

"So...." Cale looked from Kris to Dusty. "I guess you're a good friend of Kris? Funny he never mentioned you. Although you do look kinda familiar..." Where had he seen this guy before? He peered at him, then shrugged. Guy didn't look too different than any regular guy back home. Except for the rhinestones on that trucker hat. But then again, this was LA. Maybe regular guys out here wore rhinestones on their trucker hats? What did he know? He'd seen all sorts of interesting people today.

"I have that sorta face. But yeah, Kris and I are good fraaands. In fact, just this morning I was at his place fixing the rod. Making sure it was in the raaaht place." 

Cale stared at Dusty, whose face seemed innocently amused, but it sure sounded like some sexual innuendo was going on. But it couldn't be, because Kris was so obviously in love with his boyfriend. "Rod?" Cale asked cautiously.

"Yeah. The shower curtain rod. Bar. Whatever you call it." Adam turned to Kris, trying to remember to keep his voice lowered. "So, did the rod do what you needed it to do? Hold up and all that? In the right place?"

"Right place...." Kris wheezed in a breath. 

"Yessir." Adam tugged on the bill of his cap. "Did you need to wiggle it a little or shove it in hard or--"

 

**...A real big spender**

 

Cale stared at Kris, who was clutching his stomach and nearly falling over. He wasn't sure he'd ever seen Kris in hysterics like this, but hadn't John said something earlier about Kris nearly falling over with laughter? Everyone else was grinning like fools or laughing too, but Kris was the one going to pee his pants any second. And he seemed to have this weird connection with this Dusty dude, the way he was looking at him... Made no sense. No wonder they called it La-La-Land out here. That or he'd better lay off the beer. 

"I think it's bett...tt...ttter if I wiggle and you shove..." Kris gasped out, his words all but unintelligible since he was struggling to breathe he was laughing so hard. 

Cale blinked. What the hell had Kris just said? He couldn't have been hearing it right, because Kris wouldn't be talking about sex with this guy Dusty if he was going out with someone else. He wouldn't have changed that much. "Kris? Just who is this Dusty dude to you?" He frowned as Kris laughed even harder, even when the door opened and he waved someone over. It was... Oh! Lane. "Lane? Maybe she has an antidote for whatever drug you're takin'. Because I'm not sure why what Dusty said was so funny because not sure if your boyfriend would appreciate all the sexual innuendo, because I may be from Arkansas, but I'm not an idiot and the Kris I knew would never flirt like that with someone who wasn't his boyfriend, so--" 

"He wouldn't?" Adam asked.

Shaking his head and wondering why he kept talking to Dusty, but unable to stop himself, Cale explained, "No. I mean, I didn't ever see him date anyone, but Kris is not the kinda guy who'd screw around on anyone, let alone Adam Fucking Lambert, who he had a crush on forever so---" He broke off as Lane approached them and put her hand on Dusty's shoulder. Huh. Guess everyone did know the guy. 

"Hey, Adam, your car--" Lane began, then froze when Cale's head whipped up.

" _Adam_?" Cale repeated. "What the fuck---" He stopped when everyone around him burst out laughing. "Who's Adam?"

"Ohmigod...." Kris bent over, unable to stop the laughter. "Ohmigod, my stomach hurts....So much..."

Cale looked agog as Dusty swatted at Lane's arm and then used his hand to pull off his hat and whaaaaaaat? A wig? A mullet wig? Who the hell would buy a mullet wig? Who... "Adam Lambert. Oh fuck." 

Adam grimaced and ran his fingers through his hair and smiled brightly at Lane. "Laaaaaney, do you have a brush I can use?"

"You did not seriously call me over here to give you a brush?" Lane snapped as she opened her bag and rummaged around in it. They had planned to exchange their cars back in the morning and then she'd gotten a text from Adam to come over to the bar. For a brush?

"Of course not." Adam looked at Kris and winked. Kris thought Lane and Cale should meet again. "Ouch -- must you throw that bag around like that?" Adam snatched the Birkin bag out of the air as Lane went to toss it on the bar counter. 

"Whatever. What's going on here?" Lane asked, looking around as people continued laughing. Except for Cale who looked like... he was the victim of one of Adam's jokes.

"Was I... Was I just punked? Is Ashton Kutcher gonna come out? Is that why you were wearing that trucker hat -- because he does too?" Cale asked, looking around the room in confusion.

"No, it was all Adam." Kris wiped his eyes with a paper cocktail napkin and then crumpled it up to throw it at Adam. "Did you plan that?"

Adam shook his head. "No plan. It was totally spontaneous. Security told me there were paps out front, so I switched cars with Lane and put on my disguise. I honestly didn't expect Cale not to recognize me, but..." Adam held out his hands and shrugged. "It was too good a chance to pass up. I hope you're not pissed, Cale."

"Nah. That was damn good. I never suspected, except at the end, I suspected Kris had lost his damn mind." Cale shook his head. He'd been got. He'd find a way to get Adam back later, but he had greater priorities at the moment. "So... Lane." He stood up and walked around Adam to stand next to Lane.

"Hey, bartender, don't I get a drink now?" Adam complained with a pout directed at Kris. Pouts usually got what he wanted from Kris. "And maybe a hello kiss?"

"Well, now that you're back to being my Adam, you sure can. As Cale said, I'm not the sorta guy to cheat on my boyfriend, Adam Fucking Lambert, even by flirting with that hot piece of ass, Dusty Madrid." Kris leaned over the bar and gave Adam a fast kiss. Smiling, he noted,"I guess you deserve at least a kiss and a free drink. That was the best entertainment I've had in weeks." He stepped back to begin mixing a martini. 

"Humph." Adam leaned forward and whispered, "This morning didn't do it for you, huh? Well, the first rule of entertainment is to always leave them wanting more."

Kris wrinkled his forehead as he stuck a small plastic sword through two olives and pointed it in Adam's direction. "That wasn't entertaining. I'm not an audience. I'm your partner." Weaving the sword around, he paused in mid-air at the thoughtful expression on Adam's face. "What?"

"Nothing. I'm just making plans on keeping you." Adam plucked the sword from Kris' hand and stuck it in his mouth, using his teeth to pull the olives off. Handing it back to Kris, he smiled as he watched Kris stare at him, then shrug and put two more olives on the sword. Kris would ask him later and he'd tell him the truth -- that he'd just realized that being with Kris was the first time since he'd gotten famous that he hadn't felt he had some super-sized version of himself he had to live up to. Even if Kris was a fan. 

"Maybe I'm making plans on keeping you," Kris finally retorted, sliding the glass over to Adam. 

"Ah. But do you have straps and cuffs in your car like I do?" Adam winked.

"No, but Lane has your car keys and she likes me better than you, so I can get them before you do! Ha!" Kris challenged Adam. They both turned to Lane, then raised their eyebrows and smiled smugly at each other as they saw she was talking to Cale.

 

"Cale." Lane nodded at Kris' friend. It was too bad he was from _that_ place or she might find him attractive. "So, you're here visiting from... where is it? Toad Suck? Smackover? Petticoat Junction?"

Cale grinned. Lane was going to be a challenge. And he loved that accent. "It's Conway, actually."

"Brilliant. Really. So how are you enjoying LA so far?" Lane asked, grabbing her bag back from Adam who was poking around in it looking for that bloody brush. She grabbed the bag, plucked out the brush and smacked him in the stomach with it, ignoring both his grunt and his knowing look. She should have never ever never told him she thought Cale might be attractive. If he weren't from _that_ place.

"Well, we went to the beach, ate tacos, and then I've been hanging out here where I got punked by Adam Lambert. I'd say I've had a hell of a day, but it's looking even better right now." Cale smiled what he hoped was his best smile at Lane, expecting her to smack back at him at him in some way. 

Lane looked back at Cale and raised an eyebrow. She asked coolly, "Was that an attempt at flirtation by way of complimenting me?"

Cale fidgeted. Oh hell, she was hot with the way she was so cool about it. "Well, I'd hardly attempt to flirt by insulting you." 

"You'd be surprised." 

"Well, my mama raised me right. And I'm not stupid either."

"I never thought you were. You were the only one in Gopher Flats who realized Kris was gay. And who was okay with it from the beginning." 

Cale leaned closer. "So I get points for that?"

"It's a sad situation when you get points for being neither stupid nor a bigot." Lane sighed loudly. "But I suppose that's the best one can hope for from Cut and Shoot, Arkansas. Lowered standards and all that."

"It's Conway..." Cale began, then paused when he saw the little smile teasing the edges of Lane's lips. Ah, she was a teaser. Like Adam, who owed him. "Hey, Lambert. You owe me!"

"I do." Adam gave up on his hair, held out his hand and smiled when Cale shook it. "In fact, I owe everyone for not giving me up. Bar keep?" He pointed at John. "A round for everyone." 

"Hey, big spender...." Cale sang, then shut his mouth, while wondering why Kris didn't join in, but instead looked a little panicked. Was he that filled with stage fright? 

Cale asked Lane what she would like to drink, then told Kris, sighing as he handed it over, already having made it for her. Well, Kris had beaten him to that punch. He'd have to find another way to impress her. And too, now that Adam was here, he intended to grill him. Sure, Kris had gone on and on about the guy and thought he was the best thing since Chik-Fil-A, but Cale wanted to know for himself. "You owe me a game of pool." He nodded toward the back of the room.

"You'd win. Pool is not my game. So how about we say we played and you won?" Adam offered. "I'll even tweet it."

Cale shook his head. "Nope. I want the _satisfaction_ of beating you."

Adam shook his head too. "Sorry. Only Kris gets the satisfaction of beating me."

When Kris and Lane snorted, then began to giggle together, Cale blinked and then rolled his eyes. "Oh, I get it."

"Nope, only Kris gets it--" Adam began with a grin. If he wasn't going to have sex with Kris tonight, then he should get to talk about it.

Kris shoved Adam's arm. "Go ahead, now. Play nice with him and I'll gossip with Lane." 

"But--" Adam and Cale both protested in unison. 

"Go." Kris pointed toward the table. 

"Since when are you bossy?" Cale asked. He hadn't intended to do it right now. Lane might leave.

"I've been taking lessons from Adam." Kris pointed again. "And Adam, if you don't go and let Cale whip you at pool, I won't give you that edible glitter for your birthday."

"Ha." Adam rolled his eyes. "That's a gift for yourself." 

"Edible glitter?" Cale asked slowly. "I don't..."

"Don't ask!" Lane suggested. "Go get a long cylindrical object and two balls in Adam's hands and that will distract him long enough for you to ask all the questions you want."

"No kidding." Kris grinned and held up his hand as Lane high-fived it. 

As they walked over to the pool table, Adam looked back over his shoulder and smiled as he found Kris staring at him with a soft smile. He lifted his glass in a silent toast to his boyfriend. "He's awfully cute when he's bossy." 

"Is he bossy a lot?" Cale asked curiously, carrying his bottle of beer with him. "Because he wasn't back home." Although, he reminded himself, Conway wasn't Kris' home any more. LA was better for him. He could see it already. 

"No. Just on rare occasion." Adam smiled again, remembering the last time Kris had gotten bossy. He was probably going to get a hard-on every time he smelled turkey for the rest of his life. 

Seeing the warmth in Adam's eyes as he looked past the pool table at Kris, who was smiling back at him, Cale smiled himself. He could respect the guy for totally punking him and could also see the connection between them. Kris looked happy in a way he'd never seen before. "In lieu of family, I suppose I should ask your intentions about Kris."

"He's hardly a virgin bride. Thank god." Adam ran his fingers through his hair again. Ugh. It must be a disaster. He wasn't going to think about it. Damn that Dusty wig. Dropping his voice and using the Texas accent that drove Brad insane, Adam said, "It's way more trouble than it's worth, breaking one to saddle. I like to just get on and ride. And luckily Kris is a long-distance racer." He winked. 

Cale spluttered, nearly spraying his beer over the table. "I never even knew he had a sex life at all," he admitted, after wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "I guess Kris was really good at hiding stuff."

Adam nodded. "I told him he should try acting since he had experience in being someone he wasn't. Or in part. Do you know what I mean?"

"True." Cale handed Adam a stick and then picked one for himself. "I told him earlier that I felt like I was seeing the real him now -- without the layers. But he's still Kris, no matter what his parents think." 

"A person's essential character doesn't change. You just see more or less of it at different times or more or less of different aspects of it." Adam put the balls into the whatchamaallit triangle thing and shoved it toward the center of the table. 

"Oh, like we all have the capacity for good and bad within us?" Cale fixed the break and then nodded toward Adam. 

"Exactly." Adam sighed and lined up his shot. This game was so borrrring, but he'd play along. Kris played along when his friends talked about fashion. "That's one reason why when people get drunk you sometimes see a bad side you never saw before. _In vino veritas_ , right?"

"What's that mean?" Cale grinned as Adam's ball hit the bumper but did not go into the pocket. 

"That when people are drunk, they show you the truth. Like Mel Gibson."

"Oh yeah, totally. Now that I think about it..." Cale set up his shot and then paused as he thought some more, his brain moving a little slower. Damn, if he'd known Kris' boyfriend was going to be here, he wouldn't have drank so much. "Kris never got really drunk back home. I guess he was probably afraid of losing his inhibitions or saying or doing somethin'..." Hitting the ball, Cale stood up and smiled smugly as the targeted ball sank into a pocket. "So, I have to ask -- have you seen him drunk? Does he lose his inhibitions?"

"Yes." Adam grinned. "He gets awfully friendly with me in public. It's funny because ordinarily he can be quite private." 

"Hmmm...." Cale glanced over at Kris, who was leaning over the bar, yapping with Lane. "Why isn't he singing in here? He could be earning tip money. He always did good with tip money at that bar back home, I mean, in Conway. Maybe we should get him soused and then he'd sing again."

"Maybe." Adam nodded. "So tell me about his singing..." 

 

"You seem remarkably calm about Adam and Cale going to talk to each other," Lane observed as she swiveled around on Dusty's stool and looked at the two men. "Are you though, really?"

"Lane... Lane..." Kris poked her in the arm a few moments later. "As fascinatin' as Cale's ass must be, I was answering your question."

Lane coughed into her hand. "I was looking at Adam's ass."

"No, you weren't. He's got on Dusty's jeans, which are a crime against humanity 'cause they're so stinkin' loose," Kris complained. "Can't you do something about those jeans?"

"You're the one with access to his pants and what's in them. You get rid of those jeans."

"He hides them!" Kris told her. "Along with the wig and that Hid.E.Us hat." 

"You wouldn't do anything to them anyway," Lane accused. "You know how much he loves that disgusting disguise."

"Well, he does get a lot of play out of it." Kris shook his head when Lane raised an eyebrow. "Not from me! Cale was right -- I'm definitely a one-man man kinda guy. I can't even kiss Adam when he's in that disguise. But he sure as hell fooled Cale. I wish you could've seen it."

"Cale doesn't appear to hold a grudge about it," Lane observed. "It looks like the two of them are getting along well. You're okay with that?"

"I know Adam is dying to get the dirt from Cale." Kris shrugged. "I have nothing to hide -- especially since you decided to play Sydney Bristow in Conway --"

"Very funny. Hey-- so Adam gets the wig, but I didn't? There's something wrong in that!"

"Not unless you're planning on another mission."

Smiling, Lane twirled her swizzle stick through her drink. She had a strong intuition that Kris was Adam's last boyfriend and no more missions would be needed. "I'd love to dig up something on Dani's boyfriend."

"Ugh. So would Adam. But he's just your average jerk." Kris grimaced, then glanced up as he heard Cale and Adam laughing while looking in his direction. He sighed. "Well, they're no doubt having fun at my expense."

"We've had a lot of fun at Adam's expense since his friends have known him so long. And Leila showed you pictures of little Adam, right? Now that Cale's here, it's your turn."

"Good point," Kris agreed. "So, how's the recording going? What one was Adam working on today? He told me this morning, but I was..." He grinned while thinking of Adam's skill at drying him off. With his tongue. "Distracted."

"I'm sure," Lane said drily. "It's the one about glitter not being for internal use. It's a great dance track. I can't wait to see what in the world he's going to do with it on stage."

"On stage... Ooh, yeah." Kris licked his lips. "I get to be his glitter application assistant for that costume change!"

"I wonder what the union rate is for that job?" Lane smiled.

"Who cares? I'd do it for the..." Kris stared at Adam until he looked over. "For the benefits. And they are big, very big..." He crooked his finger and beckoned Adam over, smiling when Adam shoved the stick at Cale and started his way. 

"Hey, you're gonna forfeit the game!" Cale spluttered as he grabbed for the stick poking him in the nose.

"Who cares? Take my dollar. I have way more important games to play." Adam grinned as he walked to Kris. 

 

**...Good looking, so refined...**

 

Kris ducked through the gate in the bar and met Adam. "So..." He hooked his finger through the loop on Dusty's jeans and tugged Adam closer. "I can go on my break. There is a store room. Which we should take advantage of, given that Cale and I are at my apartment without you tonight and I'm gonna miss you--"

"Just one night," Adam reminded him, even as he felt his heart warm with Kris' words. "And then starting tomorrow, we stay at the hotel for two nights... Lane -- you did make the reservations for everyone?" When Lane just glared at him, Adam grinned and turned back to Kris while saying over his shoulder. "Hey, if you're not going to treat the Birkin with the respect it deserves, don't get all snitty with me when I question --"

"I didn't say a word!" Lane protested, poking her index finger into Adam's shoulder.

Adam shrugged. "Your demeanor was snitty."

"What does a snitty demeanor look like?" Lane stuck her hands on her hips.

"Like this..." Adam did an expert imitation of Lane's face.

Kris cracked up, then swallowed his laughter when Lane turned her glare on him. "Uh, yeah, Adam... So about the hotel? Are you sure that's what you want for your thirtieth birthday? Just a normal party?" Kris asked skeptically. 

"I told you. My new decade does not really begin until I turn thirty-one."

"Uh-huh..." Kris nodded and shook his head as Lane rolled her eyes behind Adam's back. 

"Lane, you can stop mocking me behind my back," Adam warned. "I am not going to freak out about turning thirty. That's so... common."

Lane threw up her hands. "True enough. It would be such a conformist thing to do, as would having a big bash for that birthday."

"Exactly." Adam turned back to Kris. "Weren't you inviting me to your lair or something?"

"Oh yeah---" Kris sighed when Cale came up.

"I was abandoned over there," Cale complained. "Hey, Lane, wanna play some pool?"

"No. I want to know what you two were talking and laughing about," Lane retorted. "It appeared that good information was being exchanged and--"

"Lane fancies herself an intelligence operative," Adam said in a stage whisper. "She wants to be Sydney Bristow at my next Halloween party."

"I can totally see you in a blue rubber dress," Cale said without thinking.

"Ooookay, TMI..." Kris whistled as Lane's mouth dropped open. "So..." He rocked back and forth on his heels. "Lane is right though. What were you two talking about?" 

"Music," Cale and Adam answered in unison.

"Really?" Kris looked from Adam to Cale and back again. "You honestly expect me to believe--"

"That there's something more interesting than a story about your viola performance in junior orchestra?" Adam grinned. 

"Now, Adam.... " Cale shook his head. "That bow breaking and hitting Missy Donahue in the head is nothing compared to the Little Mr. Little Rock Contest."

"Well, it wouldn't be if you had pictures..."

"And amazingly enough, I do!" Cale held up his phone. "I wasn't gonna show Dusty, but since you're actually Adam, that's a whole 'nother story!" 

Kris lunged, his arm outstretched as he vainly tried to grab for the phone. "Let me have it!"

"Oh, I'll let you have it later..." Adam laughed as he and Cale shuffled back, looking at the phone together. "If you like scepters, I can loan you mine..." 

"Hey, that probably should've been our first indication that you were gay," Cale teased. "Your fixation on that scepter."

"When did you know?"Adam asked curiously. When Cale blinked, Adam looked over at Kris, catching him pantomiming cutting his own throat. "What's this about?"

Cale laughed. "Oh, I really knew when he came home after seeing you on your tour two years ago and raved about you for weeks. No straight guy raves that much about a guy singer doing Whole Lotta Love." Cale froze. "Oh that's right. Kris told me you don't like to think about how he was a fan before..."

Adam held up his hand. "I'm over it. Kris was able to ...." He looked up at Kris and held his gaze as Kris took his hand and held onto that. "Convince me recently that his liking my singing was a very good thing."

"I bet he did.." Lane muttered under her breath.

"Do they often just... I dunno, fall into each other like that?" Cale asked softly as Adam and Kris stood close and spoke softly to each other, both with wide smiles on their faces.

"Yes." Lane shrugged. "It's sweet. But Adam can be... determined. What did you tell him about Kris' singing? Because I know he asked."

"It's not a state secret out here, is it?" Cale frowned.

"No, no." Lane shook her head. "Everyone knows, but no one has heard."

"That's ridiculous. He has a great voice." Cale rubbed his forehead and looked over at Kris. "Why isn't he pushing harder?"

Lane spoke carefully. "Kris got rejected -- as is the norm -- many many times. Getting rejected is unpleasant."

"Yeah, I know..." Cale sighed and looked hopefully at Lane.

Lane pressed her lips together to prevent a smile. "It builds character. We can all use more character. But speaking of Kris--"

"Which we were."

"Indeed. I love Kris. But he has a tendency to avoid unpleasantness. He doesn't like confrontation very much."

"You've met his father," Cale reminded her. "You can see--"

"Absolutely. But those behaviors aren't getting him what he wants or needs." Lane looked over at Adam and Kris. "But Kris can be assertive when it's apparently essential. Adam -- I have a feeling -- is going to make it essential."

Cale nodded. "Well, good thing. If he needs a push..."

"Oh, don't worry. Adam has no problem pushing Kris." Lane spoke in her blandest voice.

Cale gave a bark of unexpected laughter, then laughed again when he saw the mischief in Lane's eyes. "Well, good. Because Kris loves music and he should be playing it. That's basically what I told Adam. That and how every once in a while I played with Kris on his gigs too." 

"Ahhh. I remember you telling me that when I was in Comb Over." Lane smiled and looked down into her drink. "So what kind of guitar do you prefer?" Since I'll probably be finding one for you.

"Go ahead, ask," Adam urged Kris when he hesitated.

"Where did you get that picture anyway?" Kris asked. He already knew the answer, didn't want to hear it, but Adam was right - he had to keep moving.

"Your mother." Cale hesitated, then fell silent for a long moment. When he realized no one was going to pull him out of the hole, he continued, "I went over there and...asked her to give me some pictures to give to you since I didn't think they'd given you any when they... When you left. She pulled out her scrapbooks and I took pictures. She didn't want to give me any pictures because she thinks you're gonna..." He took a deep breath and continued. "You're gonna have a come to Jesus moment and see the errors of your ways, come home, and revert back to the Kris who was _her_ son."

"The apparently straight guy who was gonna live in Conway forever, marry a nice girl from church who would go over to my mom's for Sunday dinner every week and push out a coupla kids?" Kris gritted his teeth. 

"Yeah, that." Cale shifted around, uncertain what he was supposed to do. Kris looked sad and mad at the same time and he wasn't sure if he was supposed to leave him be, pat him on the shoulder or what?

"Plus, you know, you were _her_ son. Dan is your dad's son and you were your mom's -- the one who hung out with her in the kitchen and cooked with her, who sang songs for her. Never caused any problems. Made her proud. She wants that back and doesn't see--"

"That's not gonna happen. And she's only proud as long as I do what she wants and it fits within the bounds of what people at church and town think is okay. Even the music was too much out of the norm, wasn't it? I wish... But, no. She's..." Kris bit his lip. "Lane told me she was more worried about what people think than... me," he finished softly.

"I knew Lane was a good judge of character when she didn't let Pearline scare her off," Cale stalled. Feeling eyes on him, he looked over and caught Adam staring at him, then jutting his chin in Kris' direction, clearly urging him to continue. "Okay, bro. The deal is... Lane's right. You know I wish I didn't have to say that. But when I talked with her she was all on about how you're top of the list on the prayer chain."

Kris gulped. "Is this a new development -- because sure in the last two-three years there hadta have been a bigger scandal than me."

"Well, you were hard to beat, but when you came out on Leno..." Cale held up his hands. He whistled. "You know what, though? People will get used to it. They eventually got used to the north winning the war, right?"

"Eventually? Like a century later? That's hardly reassurin'. Is..." Kris began, then swallowed. "Is that what might happen in Conway for me? Someday? But like less than a century?" 

"Wow, I..." Cale paused. "I think some of them, yeah. Look at like this -- you know how some folks are still racist even after all these years? Some folks are still gonna be anti-gay years from now, but most people will get over it. Most of the girls we went to school with are getting over it already. They were asking me about you before I left."

"Let me guess -- after I appeared on Leno?" Kris surmised. "Double-edged sword, right? It's amazing what fame -- even if it's just by association -- can do to make the unacceptable acceptable."

"Wow, that's cynical, Kris," Cale said in surprise. Kris had never been cynical.

"It's true, not cynical." Kris asked John as he wiped down the bar near them and made no pretense of not listening to the conversation. "Am I right?"

"He's right. It's realistic. Only a fool denies the truth." John nodded. "You see it all the time. You see how athletes or singers, whoever, get a free pass on bad behavior solely because they're famous." 

"Well, maybe..." Cale shook his head. "But I think in this case, maybe people just have to get used to new stuff. And eventually they come around. Especially the people who know you and like you. You're like... I know!" Cale held up his index finger. "You're like a gay missionary."

"Get outta town." Kris rolled his eyes. "I'd end up being boiled in a pot."

"Well, I'm not saying to come back right now," Cale admitted, then winced when he saw the hurt on Kris' face. "Aww, geez, man, I'm sorry, I--" 

"The truth will set me free, right?" Kris squared his jaw. "Excuse me. I should go get something from the store room, right, John?"

"Sure..." John agreed. "Take a break while you're at it." 

 

 

"How are you doing?" Adam asked softly. He had waited a few minutes then come back to Kris' hidey-hole. Looking around, he imagined Kris living in the small, dark space, illuminated by two bare bulbs and hemmed in by boxes and being glad of the shelter and warmth. Kris had come a long way, but did he realize that? Was he counting his blessings or bemoaning his losses? He held back, leaning against the wall near the door, waiting to see what side of the accounting column Kris was writing on and what color ink he was using -- black or red.

"I..." Kris kicked a box. "You know what? I'm mad. I'm not sad. I'm mad."

Adam heaved a sigh of relief. "Good---"

Kris interrupted. "That's right. Good. I'm a good person. A good friend, a good teacher. I was a good son. And they threw the baby out with the bathwater. So I'm mad. You know what? You're right., what you've said, what Lane's said. Dani, your mom, even Brad said it. And you''re all right. I deserve better. I know that. So I'm mad!" He pulled back his foot and hit the box of whiskey. 

"Good!" Adam watched Kris kick the box a few more times. "I mean, anger is probably healthier than directing negative energy at yourself... but you're going to break your toe or something. Since you're wearing sneakers and not boots." 

"I like sneakers. Give up about my sneakers," Kris said automatically. He stared at Adam absently while alternately kicking his feet and waving his arms around. "I wish I was at your house. So I could go swimming and just..." Kris flapped his arms around. "Get rid of this energy."

"As what? A bird?"

"Stop it." Kris shook his head. "I'm trying to be all righteously angry. Stop making me laugh." 

"Well, that is a way to expend that energy," Adam suggested. If they were alone with a door that locked, he'd help Kris another way but... He sighed regretfully.

He looked at Adam and began taking steps toward him. "Hey, you could help me---" He grinned. "I know what's under those loose jeans. Let me have it."

"What?" Adam shook his head. No way. His hair was a mess. And the door didn't lock from the inside.

"Fuck me hard. That'll do."

"Isn't that what the farmer said in the movie, Babe?" Adam asked. "That'll do?"

"It was, 'That'll do, pig.'" Kris sighed. Adam was going to go off on one of his tangents. 

"I don't want to call you, pig."

"Fine, call me babe. Or slut. Or hedgehog. Or oh I don't know -- Kris." Kris slid his hands inside the back waistband of Adam's jeans. Huh. The loose fit actually had some uses, he decided, as he closed his hands over Adam's ass and squeezed hard. 

"Wait, you said, 'That'll do' to me. So I'm the pig or the slut or babe?" 

"For the love of....." Kris blew out an exasperated breath and tried not to laugh. "How about this? 'That'll do, sex god with the big cock?'" Kris grinned as he slid his hands around Adam's hips and began to stroke his cock and balls. "I could see the advantages of Dusty's jeans, actually. C'mon, let me have it." 

"Oh no. You're just using me. I'm just an object!" Adam sobbed loudly. He stopped abruptly. Hiding his grin, he asked, "Hold on -- you still want to have sex even though my hair is a mess?"

"That stupid wig..." Kris gritted his teeth, then seeing the amusement in Adam's eyes, laughed. Throwing his arms around Adam's neck, Kris slid his hands up into the thick strands of his hair. "Well, if your hair is gonna be a mess, it should be for a good reason. C'mere and kiss me."

 

"Bloody hell, what happened to your hair?" Lane asked when Kris and Adam reappeared in the bar. She handed Adam her brush and angled her gaze between Kris' grin and Cale's worried face. Poor Cale had been so anxious that he'd upset Kris and she and John had reassured him that Adam would find a way to make Kris smile. It had been... sweet. 

"So are you okay about back...in Conway?" Cale asked, surprised to see that Kris was teasing Adam about his hair and looking like he didn't have a care in the world. It was as if his earlier freak out had never happened. Or it wasn't a freak out, it was like Lane had said -- that Kris retreated when he got upset. But there was no sign of the upset now. 

"I..." Kris stared at him and began to laugh. "Adam got me so distracted, I forgot all about it."

"I bet he _did_." Cale wiggled his eyebrows.

Kris stared at him. "Was that supposed to be a sly look or somethin'?" 

Cale sighed. "I was doing my best impression of Joey on Friends."

"Seriously? Don't." Kris shook his head. "Don't do that." 

 

"Do it." Adam demanded.

"No." Kris shook his head.

"God, you're stubborn." 

"Ha. Pot meet kettle!" 

"I'm not stubborn for the sake of being stubborn." Adam shook his head.

"You honestly think I'm being stubborn for the sake of being stubborn?"

"Isn't that what I said?" 

"I'm not gonna do it." Kris crossed his arms over his chest. 

"Fine. It's _only_ my birthday." 

"Oh. My. God. You're not going to play that card." 

"It _is_ my birthday. This is the _only_ thing I asked you to do. On my _birthday_."

Kris sighed. Adam was looking at him with that pouty face and puppy dog eyes. He might -- might, maybe, once in a century -- be able to resist it when Adam got domineering, but there was no way on God's green earth that he was going to be able to resist the pouty puppy dog face. "Why are you so set on this?"

"Because I know you'll be great at it. And I want to experience it for myself." 

"You don't know I'll be great at it. I've never done it in front of you," Kris pointed out with what he thought was unassailable logic. 

"No. But you have done it in the shower." 

Gasping, Kris stuttered, "I...I... How do you know that?"

"I've heard you. You think you're quiet about it, but you're not." Adam smirked, then smirked some more when Kris turned bright red.

"You. Heard. Meee?" Kris knew he turned even deeper read as his voice squeaked.

"I heard you. You sounded good too. It's a shame you have never asked me to--"

"I couldn't. I'm too... inhibited to do that in front of you. Or embarrassed. Or something like that." 

"Seriously?" Tracing the outline of Kris' lips with his index finger, Adam asked in a low tone, "You've used this mouth to kiss and lick and touch what feels like every inch of my body and now you're afraid to show me this?" 

Feeling his face flush with heat and his cock start to fill, Kris asked desperately, "What if I do it badly?"

"Badly?" Adam scoffed. "You won't. But even if you do -- so what? Do you think I'm going to criticize your technique?"

"I know you're going to criticize my technique." Kris rolled his eyes. "You can't help it. You're just a frustrated teacher sometimes." 

"I... Well, I _promise_ not to criticize and by the way, if I did I only meant it in a constructive way." 

"I _know_ that! D'uh. The point is that I _want_ you to criticize my technique." 

"I'm confused," Adam admitted. 

"Well, I'm conflicted!"

"Well, I'm tired of this stupid fight!" Dani exclaimed. She paused while everyone else at Adam's birthday party chimed in with their agreement. "Kris, just get up there and sing, already."


	31. Spend a little time with me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks  
> The references to Bullwinkle, Dudley Do Right and Moose and Squirrel are from the Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoon show.

**Chapter 31: Spend a little time with me**

Kris looked up at the stage. He should've known when Leila told him that there was a stage in the room and the party theme was, 'For Adam's Entertainment!' that he'd end up on that stage. He should've known. In fact, it wouldn't surprise him if this was all a plan. He looked at Lane, then Adam, then Geoffrey. "This was all some nefarious plot. I know it."

" _Nefarious?_ " Brad giggled. "Listen, Dudley Do Right--" 

"Bullwinkle?" Neil looked up with a grin. "Okay, that means--" 

"I am not going to be Moose to his Squirrel!" Adam said quickly, while punching his brother in the arm. "Nor am I going to be distracted. Kris, will you--"

"How about we talk about it some other time?" Kris suggested.

Leila rolled her eyes. "You know better than to think he's going to budge on this. On his..." She paused, then emphasized, mimicking her son from moments' ago, " _Birthday_."

"No kidding!" Alisan complained, but with a grin. "You do know how persistent Adam is. He's not going to budge. On his _birthday_."

"I can be just as stubborn as Adam!" Kris retorted, pushing his hands though his hair in annoyance.

"No, you can't!" Allison shook her head. 

"Yes, I can!" Kris glared back, crossing his arms over his chest. 

Adam burst out laughing. Kris totally looked like a hedgehog right now with his hair sticking up, his jaw set and his rigid body posture.

Kris pointed at Adam, trying to keep his twitching lips from smiling. "Stop it. If you laugh, then I'll laugh." 

"Are they serious?" Eber Lambert asked of no one in particular. Sometimes he felt like Alice after sliding down the rabbit hole, listening to conversations that made no sense. Where was the bar again? "I swear Kris is as crazy as Adam." 

"I was right." Geoffrey smiled smugly at Eber. "They are a good match. And judging by the look on your face, you might like to know that the bar is over to the right."

"Thank god!" Eber said, standing up. 

"So what if you laugh?" Adam raised an eyebrow. "Do it. And then you won't be laughing. You'll be singing."

"But--" 

"Oh, bloody hell. I'll do it with you!" Lane offered. "We can do a duet and everyone will be so appalled by my utter inability to sing, they won't notice you a'tall." 

"OMFG, _no!_ " Adam exclaimed. "Lane! That's really unnecessary...." he wheedled. The woman could not sing. Should not sing. Ever. For the good of the world, she should not sing.

"You take the good with the bad, birthday boy. Man up and shut up." Lane grabbed Kris' hand and dragged him toward the stage. 

"What have I done..." Adam groaned.

"Be careful what you wish for, loser!" Allison laughed loudly, then stopped abruptly. "Oh hell. If Lane sings, we're all losers." 

"Which song?" Lane whispered as they looked at the list on top of the karaoke machine.

"This one." Kris grinned as he pointed. "And I think we should act it out, traditionally, you know?"

"Adam will die!" Lane grinned back and stepped to the side to poke through the huge box of accessories Alisan had brought for the birthday party. "You're an evil little man. And I love you for it." 

"I love you too, Lane." Kris closed his eyes as Lane draped a boa around his neck. A boa. Whodathunkit a year ago that he'd be wearing a boa and preparing to sing to his boyfriend on his birthday? He had a damn good life these days. And it would only get better if he was making music again. Damn it, Adam was right. But it didn't mean he couldn't torture him first. He opened his eyes and smiled at Lane, now draped in her own boa and wearing a shit-eating grin. "Let's go get him."

 

"Why are they both wearing boas?" Cale asked. When no one responded, he asked again, "Hello? Bueller?"

"Why wouldn't they be wearing boas?" Brad answered out of pity when no one else did, because -- hellooooo -- foolish question.

"It's not the boas I'm nervous about..." Adam groaned. "Lane singing..."

"Shut up!" Kris and Lane yelled at the same time. They looked at each other and then added, "I meant that in a nice way..." 

Cale choked on his drink. 

"What is it?" Brad asked Cale.

"That whole -- shut up, I meant it in a nice way? That's what Miz Allen and her own mama says."

"Oh." Brad shrugged. "Well, speaking from experience, part of the balancing act of leaving a place where we weren't entirely welcome is learning what of our past to keep and what to toss. And sometimes... the stuff we toss comes back."

Cale thought. "Oh. Like when you chew up a burrito in the garbage disposal and the next day you're still smelling beans in the sink?"

Brad laughed. "Yeah, like that." 

 

"What is he planning on up there?" Scarlett asked.

"I have no idea..." Adam responded, watching Kris talk to Lane, obviously making a plan. 

"As long as it doesn't involve flaming headdresses, I'm good." Lee grinned as Adam swatted at him. 

"I'm going to get my flaming headdress some day..." Adam shook his head. It was interesting to see Kris directing a performance for once. Or it would be if he weren't terrified of Lane singing. And wearing a boa. No good was going to come of this.

"Hey, Adam!" Kris called out. "Come up here and bring a chair with you."

"I am skeeered. Very very skeered...." Adam moaned, even as he stood, grabbed a chair and went up to the stage. 

"Tommy!" Lane called out, crooking her finger. "We need a bass."

"Sure thing." Tommy strolled up to the stage. "Anything for Kris. Have I thanked you tonight for having sex with Adam?"

"Thank you so much for saying that in front of his parents, Tommy!" Kris snapped. "Bless your heart." 

"I know that means Fuck You in Southern." Tommy grinned. Adam was totally right. It was fun to get Kris in full hedgehog mode. 

"Hmm. I guess you're not a dumb blonde." Kris flicked Tommy's long bangs. 

"I'm not a natural blonde." Tommy pointed at his dark roots.

"Good, then maybe you can keep up." Kris grinned, then feeling someone stare at him, turned and saw Lane glaring at him. 

"And... his smile fades..." Tommy intoned. "Tune into tomorrow for the latest news on the decapitation at the Beverly Hills Hotel." 

"Laney..." Kris cajoled with a smile.

"Does that smile often work for you?" Lane asked. 

"It works with me!" Adam interjected. "Remember me? The birthday boy?"

"I wasn't talking about you. You're easy," Lane retorted.

"No, he wasn't. I practically had to tie him down--"

"Oh yeah, like Adam wouldn't love that -- that was probably his plan all along...." Tommy rolled his eyes. "Waitaminit, we had to put up with workaholic grumpy Adam because he was the one..."

"Playing hard to get? Yes," Kris said absently, while running the lyrics in his head. He tapped his foot and sang under his breath, his hand moving in time to the music as well. 

"Helloooo? I'm right here. And so are my parents, thankyouverymuch!" Adam sighed, then covered his mouth to keep from laughing out loud as Kris unconsciously twirled a pink boa. 

"Well, that smile of yours isn't going to work on me, Kris!" Lane snapped, tapping her own foot and adjusting the purple boa around her neck. She craned her head and nodded at Lee, who was busily wielding a video camera. Adam would want a video of this. 

"Apparently not." Kris sighed. "But --"

"Let's do this song, alright?" Lane suppressed a grin. Kris was going to get payback when she started to sing.

"Go!' Tommy urged. 

"Oh god, I am so totally not drunk enough..." Kris complained, then jerked when Lane began singing. He guessed it was singing. And he really had not drunk enough. 

"When you walked in the joooooooooinnnnnnnnnntttttt!" Lane sang. Or shrieked, depending on your viewpoint. She smiled when Tommy twanged his bass to create a thumping "Baddooom!" period to the end of her line, then smirked at the shocked look on Kris' face while twirling her boa in Adam's general direction. Adam looked like he wanted to strangle her with the boa. Kris looked like he might be in pain. And might also want to strangle her with the boa. She waved it around again. Ha. Good. 

Opening his mouth to sing, Kris stood there frozen as Lane started. Ohmigod, Lane did have the worst voice. Ever. He stared at her in shock. How could anyone sound that bad? As he realized that Lane had stopped singing and was now waving her boa at him urging him to pick up the next line, he blinked. Oh hell, he was supposed to sing. 

"Hey, you can't sound any worse than she did," Tommy whispered as he leaned over to Kris, then flicked the feathers of the boa at Kris' face. "Right?"

Waving his hands around to push Tommy and the feathers away, Kris blinked again wondering how he'd ended up wearing a boa anyway, then grinned. Tommy was totally right. "Okay, Lane, let's start over and entertain Adam!"

"I'm really skeered...." Adam moaned, covering his face and peeking out between his fingers.

Kris smiled. Adam was awfully cute. Someday, maybe, they'd have a son who'd do that too. Whoa. Focus, dude. "Lane..."

"Ahem...." Lane cleared her throat and once again began singing, "When you walked in the joooooooooinnnnnnnnnntttttt!"

_Baddooom!_

"I could tell you were a man of distinction...." Kris sang, his voice tremulous at first, then growing firmer as the smile on Adam's face widened.

Lane tugged Kris toward Adam, waving her boa as she began singing again, "A real big spender..." She tossed the end of her boa onto Adam's head, giggling when he impatiently brushed it out of his hair. Oh no, the hair. Ha!

_Baddooom!_

Kris grinned and reached forward to run his fingertip from Adam's forehead down over his nose and traced his lips as he sang, "Soooooo good looking, so refined...."

_Baddooom!_

When Adam stuck his tongue out and licked Kris' finger, Kris grinned back and wiggled his boa in Adam's face, laughing delightedly as Adam spluttered and waved his hands around trying to push the feathers away. Picking up the boa, he fluttered the feathers in Adam's face again, while singing, "Bet I'm driving you out of your mind..." 

_Baddooom!_

Adam pulled on the ends of Kris' boa and sang back, "How 'bout you get right to the point?"

_Baddooom!_

Tommy laughed as he twanged his bass again and watched Kris' startled look change to happiness and a smidge more confidence. 

Lane once again jiggled her boa over Adam's hair, darting backward as he grabbed at it. "I don't pop my cork for every guy I see---"

Cale muttered, "Yeah, no kidding." 

Adam tugged on Kris' boa. Kris straddled Adam's legs and sang loudly, "How 'bout you spend a litttttttttttttle tiiiiiiiiime with me?"

"Great idea." Adam pulled on the boa and smiled as their lips met. A moment later, he pulled back to whisper, "Thanks."

"Happy birthday..." Kris whispered as he belatedly realized that everyone was hooting and hollering. Oh god, had he really done that in public? His mother--- oh screw it, she wasn't here. Adam's mother? She was laughing. And his dad? He looked... amused too. Nonetheless, he scrambled off of Adam's lap and blushed. Adam took advantage of Kris' distraction and moved over to the sound board. 

"Do another one!" Lane shouted as she tossed the boa back into the box. "A real song."

"I dunno what to sing..." Kris began, then as others shouted encouragement, he blushed again and looked at Adam. 

"Do it." Adam smiled and played with the controls on the sound board. "Here's a song. I think you know it."

"What's this?" Kris asked. As the notes began, his mouth fell open and he pointed at Adam.

"One of your songs." Adam grinned.

"Where did you get that?" Kris asked, looking at Adam's smug face. Oooh, he was so proud of himself. 

"From your demo reel."

"At the label? Or--"

"From me," Geoffrey admitted. "He asked for it and I gave it to him."

"Don't you need my permission for that?" Kris challenged.

"Actually, no. You signed your rights away to all of the demos and videotapes of you in my offices or talking with my representatives. As long as we do not seek to make a profit off of them, they are ours to do with as we wish. We being I. I wish to use them to make Adam happy on his birthday." Geoffrey shrugged. "And honestly, you share yourself with Adam, don't you? So why would you be opposed to sharing your music with him?" 

Adam smirked in Kris' direction. "I believe I said something similar to you last week." He laughed when Kris threw the boa at him and the soft weight of feathers lighted floated to the stage floor between them. 

 

_  
"Let me see if I understand this."_

_Kris groaned. Whenever Adam got that reasonable tone to his voice, he was screwed. He flung himself back on the bed and threw his arms over his eyes._

_"Oh no, you don't, Mr. Avoidance." Adam grinned as he straddled Kris and pulled his arms to the side. Holding Kris' wrists in the circle of his hands, he pressed them into the pillow. "You let me fuck you without a condom, but you won't sing for me?"_

_"That's totally different and you know it!" Happily unable to move, Kris' eyes slid down the long length of Adam's body until they rested on his cock. Maybe if he could distract Adam with sex, he'd forget about the singing. Win-win. Yup, he'd-- Oh shit, Adam was still talking and he had that look in his eyes. That persistent look._

_"They're both about trust." Adam slid one leg between Kris' legs, then the other, kneeing Kris' thigh and smiling when Kris automatically spread his legs, then wrapped them around Adam's hips. Some day, Kris' trust with his music would be this instantaneous._

_Tightening his thighs around Adam's hips, Kris tugged Adam closer, sighing happily when Adam leaned his entire body onto Kris'. Perfect. Well, almost perfect. Perfect would be when Adam's cock -- his bare cock -- was inside him. "You had a test, we both had tests, more than one--"_

_"Yes, I did. Yes, we did. But that's only about past behavior. By deciding to eschew condoms, we are trusting each other in the future to be faithful."_

_"Yeah, but--" Kris broke off. Eschew? Eschew? Holy shit, when Adam started sounding like an episode of Law and Order, he was in trouble._

_"But you're right. It's not about trust. It's about confidence. You have confidence in me to be faithful, but not confidence in yourself to sing well."_

_'I..." Kris stuck his tongue out at Adam. "Did you ever think about becoming a lawyer?"_

_"When I'm reviewing my contracts, you bet." Looking into Kris' eyes and seeing the anxiety there, Adam decided to change the subject. One strategy he'd learned with negotiating contracts was when to make a judicious pull-back. "Speaking of contracts, if you're sure you want to sign that medical form, my lawyer's drawn it up for you."_

_"So that you and Lane can make any decisions just in case?" Kris asked. "Good. You know after watching that tv movie about the gay couple where one got sick and the parents wouldn't let his partner in to see him even when he was dying..." He shuddered, sure his parents would do just that if they could._

_"Shhh, I know..." Adam bent his head and brushed his lips across Kris' warm and welcoming mouth. "All you have to do is sign the form and you're all set. You can do it first thing in the morning if you want. Problem solved. See? Easy."_

_Tipping his head up, Kris parted his lips and teased Adam's tongue with his own, relaxing when Adam pressed his body into the bed and rubbed his cock between Kris' spread legs. "I just ...oh yeah, right_ there _, oh fuckityfuck... worry."_

_"You worry too much. Have faith in the universe, okay?"Adam urged, just before bending his head to kiss Kris deeply enough that Adam hoped Kris would forget all his worries and just live._

_Sliding his hands down Adam's back to cup his ass and pull Adam even tighter against him, Kris smiled. Life was good. In fact, life was great. "Right now, I'll put my faith in your ability to make me come two times before morning."_

_"Two times? Oh ye, of little faith!" Adam grinned and reached for the lube._

 

"Wait." Kris held up his hand and gestured for Adam to turn off the sound. "I don't want to sing that song. It's sad. I wrote it when I was lonely and... this isn't a sad occasion. It's your birthday! Plus, that's not where I am any more. I want to play a different song. A new one. If I had my guitar..."

'Luckily, you do!" Lane grinned as she reached behind the curtains and held it up. "And Cale has one too." 

"Adam." Kris rolled his eyes as Cale laughed and ran up to the stage. "You are such a frickin' control freak."

"I'm a planner, not a control freak." Adam put his hand on Kris' arm and squeezed. "You don't have to do it if you really don't want to. I don't intend to push you to do something you really don't want to do it."

"I know." Kris smiled. "And the truth is, I want to. I just needed a push." He looked at Adam and leaned into him for a moment. Ignoring the party of people below them, Kris tugged on the hem of Adam's shirt, he pulled him down and said softly, "It feels... right to sing again. And I'm gonna sing to you. Go sit down?"

Adam patted Kris on the butt. "Go ahead. I know you're going to sing about my stupid freckles."

"Angel kisses," Kris corrected. He cleared his throat and took the guitar from a waiting Lane and took another deep breath as he automatically tuned it, knowing he was stalling for time. Looking out, he saw patience and warmth which... made sense, he realized. Most of the people out there were artists in some way or other. They'd all probably had moments of doubt and stage fright; they would know the combination of anxiety and excitement he was feeling. So it was a good crowd. And Adam... Kris looked over at him. Adam who was smiling, his eyes warm and excited too. He could do this. He would do this. He'd... focus on Adam, he decided and turned to face him. He nodded and looked back at Cale and began to play, singing, "Angel kisses..." 

He sang softly at first, then as Adam's smile grew more and more and his eyes got warmer and warmer, Kris felt his confidence surge and take off and then suddenly, _oh yes!_ There was that moment, when you feel like you're flying and everything is perfect even when it's not and yesyesyes!

Adam gripped his knees hard as he watched Kris gradually fall into the song, fall back into confidence and joy in making music. He looked free. Adam laughed softly even as the warmth of Kris' low tone and the love in the lyrics of the song washed over him. What a perfect birthday. 

As the final notes of the song faded away, Kris laughed, then laughed again. Giving a nod to the applauding group of friends and family, Kris heaved out a long sigh and focused on Adam. Adam who had risen from his chair and was walking toward him with arms outstretched. Kris ran the few steps and slammed into Adam, wrapping his arms around him and burying his face in Adam's warm neck. "Thank you, thank you...."

"I knew you liked it when I push you..." Adam closed his eyes and held onto Kris. That song and the love in Kris' eyes when he sang it... It would always remind him of that day in his bathroom and kitchen when Kris had made him feel beautiful inside and out. 

"Later tonight you can push me again..." Kris offered, raising his eyebrows up and down.

"Oh hell yeah. It's my birthday!" Adam laughed, hugging Kris tightly to him again. The best gift he'd gotten this year was already in his arms. 

Kris hugged Adam back and smiled. For all his fierceness, Adam sometimes took such an innocent delight in stuff other people were blase about. His happiness was contagious. Damn, he was glad he'd made the decision to go into Starbucks that day. He pulled back and took Adam's hand to follow Cale and Lane down from the stage. 

"Adam, why don't you sing your response song to Kris?" Geoffrey called out. Kris stopped and pushed Adam back, while jumping down from the stage.

"It's rough.... I don't know...." Adam demurred. Kris would go ballistic. 

"Oh no! No freaking way!" Kris stopped in his tracks, turned around and exclaimed. "You made me get up there with no rehearsals--"

Adam raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really? Cale said the two of you were playing music the last two days."

"You..." Kris glared at Cale.

"He asked me and then he...." Cale shrugged. "He just gets you to talkin' and then...."

"I know. It's a gift." Kris shrugged and let it go. There was no point in belaboring a fact of nature and Adam's ability to get people to talk was a fact of nature. "And now I want to hear the song, Adam. Do it. For me." He grinned. Adam had been yanking his chain because another fact of nature was that Adam was a singer, it was who he was. Well, in part, because he was also a --

"Kris, you embarrassing me..." Leila teased. "That look on your face."

"Ohmigod, I'm so sorry..." Kris moaned, then seeing the amusement in Leila's eyes, relaxed. That's right, that's right, Adam's parents were cool about stuff like that. "Adam. Do it or else when we get back to our room, I'm goin' right to sleep!" 

"Ugh. Blackmail!" Adam grabbed the microphone. "It's not perfect and--"

"We all know you're a perfectionist, son. Just do it," Eber urged.

"Yeah, remember, we're all fraaaaands here." Kris smirked. Cale burst out laughing.

Adam grinned. "You little bitch."

Cam shook her head. If someone didn't put a stop to it, Adam and Kris would just talk the night away. "Just do it. We all know you're dying to, anyway." 

"Yeah, since when do you not want to be the center of attention?" Neil asked derisively.

Kris tensed. Leila put her hand on Kris' arm and squeezed hard. "Darling, Adam can handle himself with his brother."

"And you don't?" Adam retorted. "You want attention, you just have a different way of achieving it." 

Neil snorted. "No, that's ridiculous--"

"Really? Then why do you make those snotty comments if not for people to notice you? For what you hope is your sparkling wit and snappy repartee?" 

"Speaking of snap..." Allison smirked. "As in, oh."

Relaxing as he saw that Adam wasn't upset with his brother, but instead looked wonderfully confident on the stage, Kris sat down next to Leila and Geoffrey. "Have you heard it yet, Miz Lambert?"

"Call me, Leila," she reminded him again. "And no, I haven't although I've heard good reports."

"Excellent work," Geoffrey noted with an eager smile as Adam prepared to sing. "Adam is happy and it shows in his work. Thanks to you, Kris."

"No way," Kris said instantly, shaking his head. "I was... in the right place, right time when Adam was ready to make a change. I got lucky." 

"You both got lucky," Leila corrected him with a smile. 

 

In a break in the performances, Adam held up his glass to toast his family and friends. "To changing directions and to all the wonderful people who helped push me and poke me and pull me down the better path!"

"As if anyone pokes you." Brad grinned.

"Yeah, you pretty much do what you want," Tommy agreed. 

"That's not the kind of poking I was talking about..." Brad smiled. He pretended to run away when Adam held up a large cake knife and brandished it in his direction, before cutting his birthday cake. 

"Have a big piece," Kris urged. "Don't worry about the calories tonight, okay?"

"Only if you help me burn them off later."

"That was my plan all along." Kris took Adam's hand and moved the knife over to make a bigger piece. "I think you're ability to plan is rubbing off on me."

"That's not what I want to rub on you..." Adam whispered back. 

"Can we take some of the cake back to our room?" Kris suggested. "Strictly for rubbing purposes?" He licked his finger. "Wait. Also for licking?"

 

"Is it time to rub...or lick something?" Kris asked, knowing he was tipsy as he wiggled on Adam's lap one last time as Adam said goodnight to one of his friends. Red hair. Allison or Scarlett or Carmit and why did so many of Adam's friends have red hair? And where was Lane? Or Cale? Uh-oh. 

"Something..." Adam agreed, pushing Kris to his feet and checking that he wasn't too tipsy to walk. Then again, he wasn't entirely straight himself. Hahah, straight...He laughed. 

"Like your cock?" Kris laughed loudly as his voice seemed to echo around the room. He blinked as he saw a pile of purple feathers on the floor. Purple! Feathers! Adam would like them. He picked the boa up and wound it around the neck of his guitar case on the floor next to the chair.

"TMI, thank you very much," Lane said crisply as she looked around the room one last time.

"Ooops!" Kris laughed and then buried his head against Adam's chest. "I thought you were with Cale."

"I think not." Lane shook her head. "As Adam has told me many times, the first rule--"

"Is to always leaving them wanting more." Kris nodded and wrapped his arms around Adam's neck and rubbed up against him. "Well, lord knows he kept me so hard on those dates of ours my cock could've pounded nails and--"

"Again, TMI." Lane rolled her eyes and grinned at the amusement on Adam's face as Kris practically climbed him like a tree. "I think I'll go to my own bed -- solo, mind you, since Adam is the font of all dating wisdom these days--"

"Ha. He didn't have to play those games with me. I was a sure thing!" Kris giggled, then sighed as he leaned in and licked the base of Adam's neck.

"A sure thing is the hangover you're going to have in the morning." Adam gently pulled Kris' arms loose and pointed at Kris' guitar case. With a purple boa. Feathers! "Let's get upstairs and get some Tylenol into you."

"I'd rather you get your cock into me!" Kris sing-songed, then gasped. "Hey, I could make a song out of that line and sing it for your next birthday."

"I'm sure my mother would be thrilled," Adam said drily as he stopped to kiss Lane on the cheek and thank her for her help getting the guitars. 

"Thank you, Laney!" Kris yelled as Adam pulled him towards the doors and Lane followed, then split off from them to go to her own room. "Thanks for singing with me!"

"I wanted you to sing that song -- not the Big Spender song, the freckles song -- for me again before we go to sleep," Adam told Kris as they waited for the elevator. "But I guess it can wait for morning. Start my new decade off right." 

"That was what you really wanted for your birthday, wasn't it?" Kris asked as they ascended to their floor in an elevator. Hmm. Elevator sex might be really hot. "Really, really...."

"That is the birthday gift I wanted most. For you to sing," Adam confided softly. He was not going to look at Kris and see the heat in his eyes or pay attention to the fingers playing with the button on his black jeans. Nope. 

"Really?" Kris frowned as the elevator door opened and Adam took his hand. No elevator sex? 

"Like Dusty said, you needed to get back on that horse. To remember how much you love performing your music."

"Wasn't that a gift to me?" Kris asked. He knew he was drunk, a little, but that made no sense. 

"To both of us. Seeing you so happy up there made me happy. That's my gift."

"Good lord, who sprinkled you with fairy dust?" Kris laughed softly. "Ah -- I get it. That's not glitter, it's fairy dust. That's what I saw that day in Starbucks -- it was... just like that Carpenters' song."

"What song?" Adam shushed Kris as they walked through the plushly carpeted hallway to their room. 

" _Close to You_ ," Kris told him. "You know..." He paused while Adam opened the door. Setting his guitar down against the wall, he grabbed Adam's jacket and began pushing it off, while urging Adam back through the living area of the suite toward the bedroom. 

"No, actually I don't..." Adam shook his head as he reached down and pulled Kris' shirt off in one fast movement. He'd normally like to think he had more patience, but as the night had gone on and Kris had gotten a few drinks in him, he'd taken to sitting on his lap and doing that wonderful wiggling of his and then there had been hearing Kris sing that loving song of his for the first time, so time was of the essence at this point.

"Good lord, dude, your musical edumication has been lacking..." Laughing, Kris tugged on Adam's shirt, relieved when Adam took over and got them naked in... "Whoa, that was quick."

"For once quickness is a virtue in the bedroom," Adam agreed as he turned aside to fling the covers off of the bed and onto the floor.

Kris whistled at Adam's ass. "Hey, that song never mentioned anything about your ass. I'll have to write a song about that too."

"Fantastic." Adam picked Kris up and flung him on the bed. Kris immediately began wiggling his ass on the bed. Adam paused. Where was the lube and-- "Wait. Stay there while I get us some Tylenol before we go to sleep."

"Okeydokey! Hurry up!" Kris called out, sliding his hands over his hips and stroking his cock. "Hurry up. I'll sing-- you wanted me to sing, right?"

"Oh god..." Adam groaned as he watched Kris play with himself. Move it, Lambert. Focus. Lube. Tylenol. Lube...

Singing softly to himself, Kris raised his voice as he reached the lyrics he wanted. "Here it is, the fairy dust business, only it was angels, like I said. Did I steal from that song? Uh-oh. Here goes... The angels got together...they sprinkled gold dust in your hair and something starlight in your eyes of bluuuuuuuuuuuuuueee!"

Adam burst out laughing, then groaned as he saw how hard Kris' cock was. Damn, he was dripping. "Here!" he shoved the glass of water at Kris and handed him the two pills. "Hurry up!" he demanded, waving the tube of lube.

"This isn't Viagra, is it? Because I don't need Viagra. And you sure as hell don't. Have I mentioned I like your cock?" Kris peered at the pills, then with a shrug popped them in his mouth, took a drink and smiled. "But maybe I'm like Alice and the pills will make me bigger?" He laughed and stroked his cock. "But you seem okay with my size."

"Kris...." Adam took the glass and put it on the nightstand, then knelt between Kris' spread thighs, coating him with lube as Kris planted his feet on the mattress and arched up. "You're the perfect size. Perfect..." He whispered as he positioned himself and with one thrust of his own and one wiggle of Kris, they were joined. "Perfect fit." 

"I'm never gonna let you go, you know that?" Kris asked, his voice almost as desperate in its need as the grip he had on Adam's arms. "You belong to me and always have. Right from that moment you walked into Starbucks. Trailing glitter or fairy dust or angel kisses."


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flacksbacks
> 
> NOTE: This chapter is a combination of "present day" and flashbacks. The present day events occur on the day of Adam's 31st birthday. The flashbacks in italics start with the day immediately after Chapter 31 -- the day after Adam's 30th birthday party -- and then move forward in time until the present. Some readers prefer to read the italicized sections first, then go back and read the "present day" sections.

**Chapter 32: Spend a lotta time with me**

"C'mon, tell meeeee? Pleeeeeeeeease?" Adam begged as they stood in the foyer before going jogging. "Pleeease tell me where and when my thirty-first birthday party is going to be. I neeeeeeeed to know!"

Kris put his hands over his ears and stayed deep in the front hall closet where he'd been looking for his sneakers. If he stayed in here, then Adam would not wheedle the information out of him. He knew he was the weak link. As Adam kept talking, Kris cringed and sing-songed, "I can not hear Walter Whiner. I can not hear Walter Whiner. I can not hear--- OOoh! Eee, ah... OOOH! ADAM!" Kris groaned, moaned, then cried out as Adam began kissing his neck, slid his hands under Kris' shirt and up his chest to began plucking at his nipples. "Oh yesssss....." He tilted his head and shoved his body into Adam's hands as Adam pulled him back into the hallway.

"Oh yes, so tell me...." Adam whispered, kissing his way up Kris' neck and softly biting his ear lobe. The way Kris was pushing his ass into Adam's crotch, Adam was almost ready to forget about the birthday. Almost. "Tell me--"

"OH NO!" Kris jumped back and held his hands out in front of him. "No way, no way, no way. Lane and Dani would kill me if I told you!" 

"I'm gonna kill you if you don't!" Adam glared. How he'd lost control over his own birthday party was beyond him. Maybe his mom and Kris were right and he was working too hard.

"Fuggaboutit, you control freak!" Kris shook his head, turned around and began running down the hallway. He was no fool -- he knew he needed a big head start and that Adam would catch him any way. But this chase was way more fun than jogging. "I'm more scared of them than I am of you!"

"Well, that needs to be changed!" Adam growled and counted to three before taking off after Kris. He laughed under his breath when Kris pulled off his shirt and tossed it over his shoulder. Oh, so they were playing the naked catch me if you can game? He liked that game, but Kris was using it to distract him. He knew it. Ha! He was tougher than that. Well, maybe. "Fuggaboutit, Allen! You're going to give up the goods and the intel!"

"Noooooo---" Kris called out, his voice curling around the corner as he took a sharp right and darted into the music room, Adam hard on his heels. He fought back a giggle as he nearly stumbled when Adam's hands teasingly brushed his back. Adam could have caught him at any time, damn his own short legs, but Adam liked the chase as much as he did. 

"Yesssss!" Adam tugged on Kris' shorts and then let go, just to keep the chase up. "Tell me!"

"Ha. This is home! Safe!" Kris darted, then hid behind his chair. Keeping one hand on the chair, he used the other to awkwardly shoved down his sweat shorts and underwear, tossing them in Adam's direction. "I call safe!"

"That chair is anything but safe. Except it's safe from the accusation of being attractive." Adam pretended to gag while looking at the world's ugliest chair. The only thing that would improve this chair was a bonfire or... Hmm. He smiled.

Uh-oh and hell, yeah, Adam had that awesome predatory look on his face. Kris gasped as Adam grabbed him by the ribcage and hauled him over the chair. Day-umm, all that working out they had done together preparing for and during the tour had paid off. He wrapped his legs around Adam's waist and held on as Adam sat down in the chair. "Hey, why are you still dressed?" 

"Forget that. Focus. Except even you don't want to focus on the fucking ugliest chair in the world. Remember -- You promised me you'd make it worth my while if I let you bring this chair here." 

"Blackmail!"

"Certainly not!" Adam grinned. "A simple quid pro quo. Now get on your knees and give me some quid."

"So quid is another word for blowjob?" Kris smiled as he tugged Adam's shirt off. They could jog later. Priorities. He was getting way better at setting them given how crazy busy Adam was with work. 

"Sure. It's a British word. Ask Geoffrey. Or Lane." Adam smiled. He wanted to be present when Kris asked that question. Then again, he could't imagine how Kris would work the topic of a blowjob into a conversation with Geoffrey. "However, if it's a problem upholding your end of the bargain... we can just get rid of the chair. Or--" He paused and stroked his index finger down the length of Kris' cock, watching Kris shudder with need, then bite his lip as Adam kept toying with him until he started to leak. 

"Or...?"

"Or you can tell me the location and date of my birthday party." Nodding smugly, Adam pulled his hand back and crossed his arms over his chest and waited. 

"Don't I smell coffee?" Kris took a big sniff and pointed in the general direction of the kitchen.

"All you're smelling is your own pre-come, boy." 

"Wellll...." Kris looked down at the bulge in Adam's shorts, then back up. "If you'd rather have that than coffee... be my guest."

 

_  
"Hey. I ordered coffee from room service, so...." Adam tickled his fingertips up Kris' side, smiling when Kris batted at him sleepily. This attempt was his third at trying to get Kris late in the morning after his thirtieth birthday. Or maybe it was early afternoon. Whatever. They needed to get going. "Wake up...wake up..."_

_Kris kicked Adam's leg, then slid his thigh over Adam's and squeezed tightly. "Why are you waking me up? We finally went to sleep like at three am. After having what was awesome birthday sex, so even you should be tired. Especially since you're now thirty. Ha. You know what I just realized -- you'll always be older than me. Hahahaha!"_

_"Wow, prickly much in the morning? I woke you up because I need to ask you something, hedgehog."_

_Grinning at the nickname, Kris said, "I hope it's to ask me if I want a blow job, because otherwise..."_

_"Since when I do need to ask that? Isn't your answer a given, you little slut?" Adam teased, slipping his arm around Kris' hip and stroking his fingertips along the top of Kris' buttocks._

_"Who _isn't_ a slut for blow jobs?"_

_"Excellent point." Adam smiled, then pulled Kris' leg higher over his hip. "Come here."_

_"Mmm..." Kris wiggled as close as he could, then straddled his hips. "So you gonna ask me if I wanna get fucked? Because really, Adam, just assume the answer to that is yes. In fact, you can pretty much assume that anything you ask me, my answer is yes."_

_"Is that right?"_

_"Well,_ obviously _."_

_"Obviously?"_

_Kris leaned forward to kiss Adam's bare chest. "Like if you ask me, 'Do you think I have the best ass in LA?'_ Yes. _If you ask me, 'Do you think I am the best lover in the world?'_ Yes. _'Do you think I am the best kisser in history of the universe, including aliens?'_ Hey-elllllll _, yes."_

 _"I only have the best ass in_ LA? _Well!" Adam snorted, even as he held Kris against him. He was never going to let Kris go. Hell, he was small enough he could fit into Adam's pocket. If he were wearing pockets, which he wasn't. He was naked and so was Kris, so why were they talking again? Oh yeah, that's right. He was leading up to something._

_Kris grinned against Adam's chest. "Well... the last time I looked at man's ass it was yours and it was in LA, so yeah..."_

_"Good save." Adam smiled._

_"Mmm. Yeah, except..." Kris slid his hand down inbetween them and cupped Adam's balls. He licked his lips. Damn they were big. "There. Now I saved your balls from being blue."_

_"You've saved more than that..." Adam whispered, curling his hand around Kris' neck to pull him down for a kiss. "You saved me from being blue."_

_"Hmm?" Kris asked, still bemused by the tenderness of the kiss._

_"It's... You make me happy, Kris Allen. I didn't expect to find happiness that day in Starbucks, but... that thirty-eight cents has bought me nothing but happiness and hope. You... give me what I need, Kris. And what I want."_

_"Me too," Kris said sincerely. "You, you know how happy I am with you too, right?" As Adam smiled in agreement, Kris buried his face in Adam's neck and took a deep breath. Damn, how did Adam always smell so good? Kris smiled and and curled his hand around the back of Adam's neck to pull him closer for another kiss, ignoring the voice in his head that sounded like his father, telling him that being sappy and wanting to cry wasn't manly. He was going to ignore it, because he was happy and as Geoffrey had told him, just keep doing what makes you happy. And Adam..._

_Feeling the trembling of Kris' lips and the tight grip Kris had on his neck, Adam pulled Kris deeper into this own embrace, realizing it was Kris' turn to be needy about feeling safe. He must be thinking about his past, either from when he was homeless or when he'd thought he'd had a home back with his parents but been proven wrong. Well, Adam decided, curving his own hand around the back of Kris' head, he was going to prove to Kris that he always had a home in his arms._

_Kris rubbed his body against Adam's, sighing happily when Adam shifted so that Kris could curl even closer. He trailed kisses over Adam's jaw, smiling at the scratchy stubble on his cheek that pricked his memory. He lifted his head, then dove back in for another kiss, pausing only to take a deep breath. "I still can't believe you're naming your cd, Thirty-Eight Cents and Change," he said huskily when he lifted his lips from Adam's. "It's an incredible gift. I... don't deserve it. I really don't. I can't give you something big like that."_

_"Well, you can give me this...." Adam cupped Kris' cheek. "Would you move in with me?"_

_"Move in with you?" Kris heard his voice squeak. "Like live together?"_

_"Or_ really _live together, as opposed to_ like _living together."_

_"You..." Kris shoved at Adam's shoulders, then laughed._

_"What's so funny?"_

_"I was gonna ask you." Curling his hands around Adam's shoulders, Kris held on tightly. "But I guess it's time for you to actually make a move first in this relationship. You really need to be more aggressive--- Oooh!" Kris shrieked as Adam pushed and tumbled him onto his back onto the rumpled sheets of the bed. Huge bed. "Hey -- we should get one of these California kings for our bedroom!"_

_"Our bedroom? So that means, you're saying yes?" Adam confirmed, needing to hear the words._

_"Like you had any doubt? C'mon!" Kris rolled his eyes and lifted his body to meet Adam's caressing hands. He groaned as Adam's touch seemed to be everywhere at once, the combination of his strong hands and loving gaze warming his skin and his heart from the outside in and the inside out. He'd follow Adam anywhere and everywhere. "I'd move to the moon or or Jupiter with you!"_

_"Right now, I'm more interested in Uranus."_

_Kris froze, then broke into a long spate of helpless laughter. Every time he thought he had it under control, he fell into renewed giggles. Finally, wiping his wet eyes, he squeezed Adam's arms. "You had to know I'd say yes."_

_"You have prickly moments of stubborn independence," Adam teased as Kris wrapped his arms around Adam's back and clung._

_"Well, there's stubborn and then there's stupid. Come to me. Take me home right here." Kris wiggled under Adam's body and sighed when Adam pressed into him._

_"Right here?" Adam kissed Kris' jaw, then took his mouth in a long slow kiss he knew he would remember forever, the way Kris opened to him, took him in and made his pulse race while his heart pounded with happiness._

_"Home is here..." Kris placed his hand over Adam's heart._

 

"Shouldn't we stick at home today?" Adam asked as he followed Kris along a path in Griffith Park. 

"Why?" Kris smirked. "Do you really think we'd have your birthday party at our house? And who said your party was today, anyway?" 

Adam smirked to Kris' back. Oh, hell yeah, his party was today. He schooled his features into a pout. "Well, my costume is there."

"Your costume will be delivered, don't worry. And at least I gave you enough information so that you could design it yourself. Dani and Lane didn't want to, so you owe me." Kris pointed at the GPS unit in Adam's hand. "Pay attention to the coordinates, please." 

Adam sighed loudly and stomped his booted foot. "I'm wearing my brother's shit-kicker boots on my birthday. That's wrong. We're seriously going geocaching on my birthday?"

"What's that mean? I thought you liked geocaching? That's what you always told me!" Kris barked. Damn, he hoped he could maintain the facade. This was going to be a long day...

 

 _  
"Well, this isn't going to take any time. I told you I could do it myself." Kris gestured toward his backpack, that contained all of his worldly belongings except for his guitar and his chair. Oh and his stepstool. Couldn't forget the stepstool. Even if he had a second one at Adam's... no,_ their _house. You could never have too many stepstools because you could never have too much sex._

_Adam rolled his eyes behind Kris' back. Stubborn to the end. "It's a moment. To share. One we'll always remember. When you leave your little nest..."_

_"I'm not a bird." Kris paused. "Wait. If I was a bird, what kind of bird would I be? I mean, obviously you'd be a peacock, but what am I? A sparrow?"_

_"A sparrow?" Adam scoffed. "That's way too common. Let's see, what kind of bird has a hot ass?"_

_"I don't think any bird has a hot ass. There's that monkey with the red ass, though."_

_"That's not hot, as in smokin'. It looks inflamed, as in infected. Yuck."_

_"I think it gets red when the monkey is in heat."_

_"Well, then it's a girl monkey and I'm not really interested. Also -- newsflash? I'm not a monkey."_

_"I bet a boy monkey would be interested. A straight boy monkey."_

_"But I'm not a straight boy monkey. You just said I'd be a peacock. Now, you--"_

_"Oh my god, stop!" John begged. "Someone just take the other end of this futon so we can throw it into Kris' truck and bring it to my niece's already. Then you two can go to the zoo or something."_

_"Ha. I have way better mating rituals for us to watch at home." Adam wiggled his eyebrows while John shook his head._

_"I don't need to hear about your porn preferences, dude. Just pick up the futon."_

_"I could do it!" Kris protested._

_"No, honey. Let the big strong man take care of it for you..." Adam teased in a patronizing tone, just to see Kris turn red. As Kris spluttered, Adam shrugged and picked up the futon. "Don't forget your stepstool. You'll need it in the kitchen-- Hey!" Adam laughed as Kris smacked his ass in retaliation. He'd pay for that teasing later. Gladly._

_"You do that just to see him get agitated, doncha?" John asked. They carefully angled the futon threw the door and began to edge it down the hallway towards the stairs._

_"Yeah. I like my boy's face red, not his ass. So not into spanking." Adam winked at John. They both knew Kris was never going to let them get away with shutting him out of doing his fair share._

_Kris ran over to the doorway. "Well, I could be into spanking. Wait until we get home tonight, Adam and I'll... I'll..."_

_"While you're thinking about it, John and I have a futon to move for you, little man."_

_"Little man! I'll do that futon!" Kris demanded, elbowing Adam as he shoved by him and pulled on John's arm. He wasn't even going to try to move the immovable object that was Adam. "And next is my chair!"_

_"No fucking way are we bringing the fucking ugliest chair in the fucking universe to our fucking house!" Adam exploded, grinning at John as he walked by._

_"Stop it..." John begged as he bit his lip to keep from chuckling, then heard Kris burst into laughter. He watched the two men maneuver the bulky frame down the stairs and shook his head as he saw the open happiness in not only Kris' face but his eyes, before he turned away to look over his shoulder as he walked backwards down the stairs._

__

Turning around and glaring at the scrub bushes that covered the area, Adam kicked the dirt path and scowled in frustration. What were the three of them planning for his birthday? "Where is it?" 

"I don't know." Kris frowned too. Brad had done way too good of a job hiding the box. Oh shit, did Brad know you weren't supposed to bury the box? 

 

_"I'm taking this to the dumpster now," Adam announced, picking up the chair._

_"What? No way!"_

_Adam gaped at Kris. "Seriously? Has the constant wearing of plaid damaged your retinas? You truly want that ugly orange mushroom chair?"_

_"I do."_

_Seeing the obdurate set of Kris' jaw, Adam set the chair down. "Why? Justify."_

_"It's just..." Kris paused and bit his lip. Walking over to Adam and the chair, he put one hand on each. "That chair, it can remind me not to take you or us for granted. I got that chair off the curb, where someone had thrown it. No one wanted it, but I had no chair -- so it was an awesome find for me. It wasn't pretty, but it was comfy. It was comfy when nothing else was in my life, you know?"_

_"I see," Adam said softly. He did see. The chair was Kris -- thrown out, but still worthwhile to someone with a good eye and their own needs. He wondered if Kris even realized. "So tell me more about this chair."_

_"And...I'd sit in it and practice my guitar or just... think. And... Before that day you walked into Starbucks, I used to sit in that chair and look at the big nothing of my grey apartment. And then down at those damn orange mushrooms and think about how much my life sucked. And don't say one reason my life sucked was because of those mushrooms!" Kris poked Adam's arm._

_"I wasn't going to. Not right now." Touching Kris' cheek with his fingertips, Adam urged, "Go on."_

_"Then you came in and... my life changed. You helped me see things differently. I stopped spending so much time thinking and waiting and started... doing. And then..." Kris grinned. "You shaved my balls in that chair and I told you I loved you and you told me you loved me and... I was staring at those orange mushrooms in a whole new way."_

_"So it's a transformative memory too." For him, Adam knew, it was meeting Kris in Starbucks._

_"Ah, yeah." Kris nodded. "What you said. I'd say it was a super hot memory."_

_"Honey, if it's just about sex, I'll gladly pay to replace that chair with a sling." Adam nodded as he glanced towards the doorway. "That sounds like a plan -- we'll throw that chair into the dumpster and I'll have Lane order you a sling-- Amazon must have them, right?"_

_"Are you out of your mind?" Lane asked as she flung her bag onto the floor right inside the doorway._

_"Lane!" Adam growled automatically. She was on his side in that stupid argument he'd been having with Kris over money. He just wanted to get Kris home._ Home. __

_"Get over it." Lane smiled slowly as she saw the happiness in Adam's eyes._

_Kris rolled his eyes. That stupid game of Lane and Adam's. "Hey, Lane, talk to him. He won't listen. I want to pay my way. Halfsies."_

_"We've already had this discussion. Multiple times." Adam slapped the top edge of the chair. His patience was nearly at an end on this topic._

_"Darling..." Lane touched Kris' arm and shook it. "Do you have any idea how much it costs to rent that house you're moving into? Let it go."_

_"But..." Kris looked down at Lane's hand. She clearly wanted to shake sense into him. He counted to ten. He was being irrational. Ruining the day. Prideful. Too much pride was a sin for a good reason. And it's not like he could or would ask Adam to live in the type of place Kris could afford. That wasn't fair. "But I don't want to be a mooch. I want to pay my way, contribute."_

_Adam nodded slowly. Any other guy and he would have made a joke about paying his way on his knees, but Kris didn't find those types of jokes funny in the slightest. And he had more pride than was strictly necessary. "How about... you contribute by cooking one night a week and making breakfast? Or keeping us stocked in glitter."_

_"Edible glitter? That I'd be happy to do!" Kris agreed._

 

"I hope my party is sparkly Unlike this venue." Adam grinned as he watched Kris impatiently poke through a bush, then kick a rock while looking for the cache box. "Hey, wouldn't it be funny if the box was actually one of those rocks that you hide keys in?"

"Rocks you hide keys in? What are you talking about?"

"Yeah. Brad had one for this one house he rented a room in and--" Adam paused as Kris slapped his own forehead. "Did Brad hide the box for you?"

"Mebbee...." Kris muttered. Maybe enlisting Brad's help hadn't been his smartest idea. Brad loved playing jokes. 

"Does the box have a clue about my party?" Adam asked eagerly, bending his knees to get a different perspective.

"What are you doing?"

"Getting into position--"

Staring at Adam's ass, Kris shook his head. "Position? First of all, we're outside, you know, in public? Second of all, I don't have my step stool."

"Third of all, it's my birthday and not yours." Adam smirked. "I'm just looking from Brad's vantage point and yours. The shorter than average vantage point."

"I'm taller than Brad. His spikey-uppy hair just makes him look taller."

"You are not seriously developing some sort of short man syndrome, are you?" Adam shook his head as he kept looking. "Because one thing I love about you is that you don't have short man syndrome. Although I suppose that truck is big enough that it could be a compensatory vehicle--"

"Yeah. if what I'm trying to compensate for is a dick that's old and even rustier than my bucket of bolts."

"Well, that's a sublime image..." Adam pointed. "There!" 

"Where?"

"Right _there_. By your left foot under that weed that's probably some endangered plant." Leering as Kris bent over and hesitated, Adam pointed again. "The rock with the unnaturally rounded edges. I remember it."

Kris shook his head as he picked up the rock, saw the little latch on the underside, then tossed the rock toward Adam. There were times when he found Adam's ability to remember and pull out seemingly inconsequential details when necessary kinda scary. "You seriously remember a rock?"

Rubbing his fingertips along the side, Adam repeated. "It has unnaturally rounded edges." 

"Are you going to argue your birthday away or are you going to open the damn rock?" Kris glanced at his watch. Time was wasting. 

"So impatient, my hedgehog..." Grinning as Kris scowled and considering it time well-spent, Adam twisted the opening in the bottom of the rock and pulled out a small piece of paper with more coordinates. Looking them up on te GPS unit, he sighed and began walking, Kris keeping his mouth tightly closed, obviously to keep from spilling the beans. Who knew Kris could keep a secret? But then again, he'd kept the secret of his sexual orientation for years, so this was nothing. "You know, you're an annoying brat keeping this secret from me."

"Ha!" Kris laughed. He had won this game. Everyone had thought he'd spill the beans. "You like surprises!"

"I like being in control."

"You can tie me to the bed later. I'll make that sacrifice." Kris sighed melodramatically. "Can we get moving? I'm sure you want to have enough time to primp."

Adam held his hand out and Kris took it as they walked upwards. "Ha. We're about ten minutes away from our destination -- Griffith Observatory, right? It's super duper close, so there's enough time to get there and get ready. Plus, when we all went to see that show on Water Is Life for the charity: water benefit, I said the place was perfect for a party."

"Well, actually Brad said that." Kris laughed as he saw how pleased Adam was with figuring the location out. "But good catch--"

"Here and I thought catching was your position." Adam let go of Kris' hand to squeeze his ass.

Kris squeaked and then winked, before slapping Adam's ass. "Hey, as I recall from that tour stop in Miami, you'd qualify for MVP status on catching."

"Well, if you're going to do something, do it right -- that's my motto."

"Making me see stars is your motto." And that, Kris thought, was why the theme was perfect.

Enfolding Kris into his arms, Adam hugged him tightly before letting go. This day was shaping up to be perfect. If he only knew what was going on. "So is that the theme? Water Is Life? It would fit my Aquarian birthday..." Adam said, hoping he'd guessed correctly. Why had he let others plan his birthday party? 

"Nope. That would be obvious and too easy. Although..." 

"There's nothing wrong with being too easy?" Adam leered down at Kris. "I believe we demonstrated that the day I came home from the tv shoot. In the foyer, in the kitchen, in the music room--"

"See?! You like my orange mushroom chair!" Kris crowed triumphantly. 

"I like you naked playing a guitar in the orange mushroom chair. The chair is still the fucking ugliest chair in the universe, but I don't notice when you're hot little body is in it while you're singing your heart out for me." Adam grinned. "And as per usual, nearly humping the chair while you sing."

"I do not!" Kris stifled his laughter and shoved into Adam.

"Yes, you do. Remember -- I was sitting on the floor in front of you. Not only were you humping that chair, you were getting excited."

"Because you're mouth was at cock-level!" Kris retorted.

"Why not say that a little louder? I'm sure someone in Santa Monica missed it." Adam laughed as Kris turned red, then nodded toward the large white building with three domes visible in front of them. "You know that building is sort of phallic."

"Huh?" Kris shook his head. "Clearly, you are working waaaaay too much or I'm not putting out enough if you think that is any way phallic."

"No, just look. One large sticky-uppy thing in the middle and two shorter and therefore rounder balls on either side. It's like... the genitals of giants."

"Yeah, sure. Like I said, _I'm clearly_ not putting out enough or you're working too hard. Or maybe I'm not putting out enough because you're working too hard." 

Adam glanced back and winced. " _Clearly,_ you're feeling neglected. I'm sorry. Please say something or tie _me_ to the bed if I get too focused--"

"It's not about sex. I misspoke. That's not it..." Kris bit his lip. Damn it.

"We have enough sex, but not enough time," Adam realized. Truthfully, now that he thought about it, he had finished the tour and aside from a short vacation, he'd not only been working non-stop ever since, he'd been away for over three weeks on that television shoot. The day off he'd taken after that -- even with all the welcome home sex -- had been quickly eclipsed by nearly two months of non-stop work. He'd have to think about how to achieve better balance while still keeping all the plates spinning. 

Seeing wheels turning in Adam's head at a furious rate of speed, Kris wanted to spank himself. He had no call criticzing the man for doing his job to begin with, but especially on his birthday. And as Cale had oh-so-helpfully pointed out, part of it was his own fault. "Oh hell, it was mostly my fault for refusing to go to Louisiana because I didn't have a job to do there and didn't want to be a groupie..."

"And because it was too close to Arkansas.." Adam said softly, sliding an arm around Kris'  
shoulders to give him a hug. Kris had thought the temptation to go back to Conway might be too great because he wasn't ready -- he said -- to deal with his father. "But even still, since I've been back. I've been overextended. Which is indeed my fault, but I need you to help me on that. Say something when we're not spending enough time together, okay?" 

Kris nodded, promising himself that he'd speak up more. "But we're togther now. I... That's one reason I set up the clues via geocaching."

"Good idea." Adam smiled down at Kris. And actually, they were alone, so... But they were in public, so he couldn't fix Kris' feelings, so party it was. Although maybe first... Adam tugged hard until Kris slammed into him and swallowed his yelp of surprise with a deep kiss. Forgetting about his birthday and work and even his costume as Kris opened his mouth and met his own need with passion and those little sounds that... Starting to push Kris to the ground, Adam stopped, panting and asked, "So, is there another rock?"

"Yeah..." Kris rubbed against Adam's leg. "In my jeans." 

"Mmmm..." Adam curved his hands around Kris' ass and pulled him up, shoved his thigh between Kris' and pressed up, moaning when Kris tilted his head back and made that little sound that... 

"Adammm...." Someday, Kris decided they were going to go somewhere so private they could have sex outdoors. 

"Oh fuck, Kris... We need to stop. I don't see anyone out here, but I don't want any pictures of us, of you looking like that out there...." Giving into temptation, Adam bent his head again, slowly kissing Kris until they both were out of breath and resting their foreheads against each other. Squeezing Kris' ass one last time preparatory to letting him down, Adam smiled as he felt paper in Kris' back pocket. "What is this? Another clue?"

"Yes." Kris grinned. As usual, Adam had changed his plans. "The last coordinates were going to be for the men's bathroom. It's the theme. I was going to make you search for it."

Pulling the paper out, Adam unfolded and smiled as he looked at the small print out of the famous painting. "The theme? I get it. Starry Starry Night by Van Gogh. Excellent."

__

_"Why were they hounding me? I'm not the star," Kris complained._

_"You okay, Kris?" Adam asked as he held tightly onto Kris' arm while automatically smiling his thanks at the doorman who firmly closed the door behind him and used his bulk to block the entrance to the club. "Damn, I'm sorry about that. They were determined tonight."_

_"Wow, what_ was _up with the paps tonight?" Kris took a long breath. Moving through the swarm of paps had been like swimming upstream. A stream where not only the current was against you, but there were weeds grasping at your arms and legs, twining around you, holding you back. "Why were they asking me about teaching and being an unfit role model for pre-schoolers? Shit! It sounded like that meeting at the pre-school all over again."_

_"Oh crap!" Adam whistled silently through his teeth and rubbed Kris' back. "I'm sorry about that. Are you okay?"_

_"I'll be... fine," Kris decided he was going to be fine. "It's my turn, right? All that crap you get thrown at you... I was due for it, I guess. But why now?"_

_"Those pictures of you and me taking the Cherry boys to FAO Schwarz when we were in New York the other day -- they've somehow started this -- Wait. Did you read that link I sent you?" Adam frowned as he followed the hostess to a table and said nothing more until they sat down and the hostess left while promising to send the waiter over immediately. Damn, Kris was taking this avoidance business a little too far._

_"I...uh..." Kris rubbed the back of his neck and looked away._

_"Let me guess. You didn't. Kris -- you need to be prepared. What's that saying -- forewarned is forearmed."_

_Glancing up and seeing the impatience on Adam's face and knowing he'd made a mistake in pretending to himself not to see the email, Kris gripped his own knees. He should save the pretending to himself for more important stuff than Conway crap. "I...uh, no. I told you. I don't want to read anything anyone from Conway has to say. I mean, except for Cale and he's away on a mission trip. so... Nope. No interest."_

_Adam pressed his lips together as the waiter came over to take their drink order. The brief conversation allowed Adam to push his irritaton down. Kris had scars, well, actually, no. Not scars, not yet, still wounds that could be hurt. Once the waiter had left, Adam took Kris' hand off of his knee and squeezed it. "Okay. I'll do the Sparks Notes version for you. Those pictures of us with the Cherry kids led some fans to speculate on Twitter about if or when we'll have kids of our own and then to further speculate that given how you once worked at a preschool that you really liked kids. So--"_

_"How did the fans even find that out?"_

_Adam shrugged. "I've long since accepted the fact that the CIA would have found Osama bin Laden much earlier if they put my fans on the case. They can find out anything." He stroked the back of Kris' hand._

_"Normally, I find that weird but kinda endearing, the way this old auntie in Conway wanted to know every detail about me and Dan. She was a busybody, sure, but she meant well." Kris took a deep breath and then forced himself to smile at the waiter._

_Seeing the grimace that Kris probably thought was a smile, Adam ordered their usual late-night light meal at this restaurant and then turned back to Kris. "Exactly. You know they don't mean anything negative or hostile by their interest in you. They're just curious. And it's a circle. The press found out about the pre-school because of the fans, then realized the fans were interested, so they pick up --"_

_"I know that!" Kris snapped, then bit his lip. "Sorry, sorry."_

_"Apparently, it's not okay." Adam looked at Kris, busily averting his eyes and tapped his hand. "So let's just get this over with."_

_"That's your m.o., not mine."_

_"C'mon. Rip the band-aid off instead of my head," Adam urged, once again forcing himself to be patient._

_"Fine. What did they say?" Kris tilted his head and drained his glass in one long gulp._

_"Slow down, cowboy." Squeezing Kris' hand, Adam told him, "Same old. You were a good teacher, kids loved you, it was a shame you revealed yourself to be a tree-worshipping pagan with a pentagram tattooed on your ass. And even more disturbing, you were a vegetarian who doesn't really like country music, plaid or Chik-Fil-A. "_

_Kris looked up startled, then grinned. Only Adam could tease him out of being sad in a few sentences. And really, why should he be sad? He had a great life with a great boyfriend. "You goof ball."_

_"What? You don't like country music." Adam smiled back. Good, Kris wasn't morose any more. "And I have to say if you're going to get something tattooed on your ass, I'd prefer it be my name, not a pentagram. In fact, that's what I want for my birthday next year. My name on your ass."_

_"You seriously do not think I'm getting a tattoo of your name on my ass!"_

_"Well, no. I expect it to say more than that. It should say, 'Belongs to Adam.'"_

_Kris blinked. He probably shouldn't have slugged that drink down because Adam sounded serious and he couldn't be. Right? Nah. "You can paint it on my ass with edible glitter."_

 

"Face and body painters?" Adam asked excitedly as he looked around the lobby as a team of decorators transformed it into a backdrop of Starry Starry Night. Apparently everyone was portraying stars or zodiac signs or something awesome. 

"I know, total fun, right?" Dani smiled. "And lots of wearable glitter too."

"And henna tattoos!" Kris added. "Did you know you can have glitter added to henna tattoos?"

"No. I did not." Adam raised an eyebrow. "Is there something I should know?"

"Something you should see, maybe." Kris grinned. His appointment was set for the minute Adam went into the little alcove to get his hair done and for Sutan to do his makeup. Sutan was going to keep Adam distracted. "Later. If you're a very very good boy."

"Define good."

"Well...." Kris ran his fingertip down the center of Adam's chest. "I expect to see stars tonight. And I don't mean at the show in the planetarium."

"Are you sure? Because it's nice and dark in the planetarium..." Adam picked up Kris' hand and brought it to his mouth, kissing the palm. 

"Oh hell, that would be so hot..." Kris agreed, not noticing when Dani rolled her eyes and walked away.

"A total trip. Seeing the stars over head and then..." Adam pulled Kris close.

Wrapping his arms around Adam's neck, Kris smiled up into those blue eyes, alight with happiness and love. "I'm already seeing stars."

 

__

_"It's your night to shine. Excited?" Lane asked as she fussed with Kris' shirt collar and blocked Hannah's view. Hannah. Humph. "You're going to be a star."_

_Giving Lane a quick one-armed hug, Kris demurred, "It's just John's brother's coffee house. And for the record, I'd be thrilled if I made enough money just to pay my own way through life! My verson of life, not Adam's," he laughed. "I maybe could afford my version."_

_"Yeah, it's not as if those shirts cost the earth!" Brad teased as he came up behind them, along with Allison and Tommy._

_"What are y'all doing here?" Kris looked around in surprise._

_Flinging her arms around Kris, Allison shook him. "We're here to suport you on your first real foray back into public performing. That's what family does, right?"_

_"Family..." Kris looked down and fidgeted with his guitar. Family. He did have his own little family out here. He looked back up and smiled. "Thanks. I mean it, thanks."_

_Hannah looked at her watch. "Where did Adam go?"_

_"I bet he's in there annoying the shit out of the poor guy who does the sound," Tommy answered._

_"You got it." Kris grinned. " Thanks for coming out. I appreciate it. It's always easier with friendly faces in the audience."_

_Brad nodded and reached up to flick his fingers thorugh Kris' messy hair. "Aren't you going to do something with your hair? Adam! Priorties!"  
_

 

"Okay, guys, enough of that! Dani tugged on Adam's arm.

"Bringing in the reinforcements?" Adam asked, smiling at Lane and of course, Cale who was trailing after Lane. He had to give the guy points for persistence. He included Brian in his smile since it was his birthday and even if his wish that Dani might permanently break up with him had been unfufilled. well, no one ever said your birthday wish had to come true on your birth date. He had all year. It was his birthday, so he got to make the rules. So there, universe. 

"But we have a different definition of good for you, Adam. You can't complain about the fact that you have half an hour to get ready." Lane pointed toward a screened-off alcove.

Adam squawked, "What? Are you serious? Are you freaking kidding me? I -- my hair!"

Dani giggled. "Your hairstylist is actually here. So stop complaining and get moving."

"And my costume...It's supposed to look like flowing water..." Adam groaned as he rushed off. 

"Here's your phone, Kris." Lane slapped the phone into Kris' stomach. "I've told you once, I've told you a thousand bloody times to stop leaving your phone all over the place -- bloody hell, you have pockets! And at least to password protect it. If you lost this phone, not only is your banking info on here, but a lot of intel on Adam."

"Yes, Mom." Kris rolled his eyes.

"Actually, I don't blame you for yelling at him, Lane. He lets his texts and voice mail just accumulate on that phone. Until they're automatically deleted. Remember how he thought I was, assumed I was a redneck asshole too. Just because he didn't check his voice mail. Humph." Cale sniffed, then laughed when Kris kicked his leg. "Hey, if you'd checked your voice mail, you wouldn't have gone two years thinking no one from Conway cared about you."

"Shaddup, asshole."

"What are friends for?" Cale shrugged, then stood up straight when he realized Lane was smiling approvingly at him.

 

_Rolling his eyes, Adam grabbed Kris' phone and turned it on. "This is Kris' phone, but this isn't Kris."_

_"Lemme guess -- he left it some place?"_

_"Hey, Cale. He's at work and left the phone in the refrigerator this time."_

_"He always does that." Cale heaved out a long breath. "Listen, just as well I got you. I want your advice. About Kris' mom."_

_"What is it? She's not sick or something is she?"_

_"No, no. She's bugging me for Kris' phone number and I'm not sure I should give it to her."_

_"Why not? Isn't that a good thing?"_

_"I...don't think so. I don't think she's actually accepted him. I think she does miss him, but not enough, you know? I think she just wants the number to nag him. Into coming home, into being straight, you know the drill."_

_"Well, fuckityfuckfuck."_

_"Eloquent as always, Lambert, but yeah." Cale tapped his foot. "So my question is -- should I tell him that his mother is asking about him but not for good reasons or keep my damn mouth shut?"_

_"I think you have to tell him. That's a secret that can blow up."_

_"Secrets have a way of doing that."_

_"Absolutely. Just..." Adam took a deep breath. "Damn it."_

_"I know. I have to tell him without getting his hopes up, but without killing him, right?"_

_"That sounds like a plan. I wish... Do you think it would help if I talked to her?"_

 

"Sounds awesome!" Kris enthused as he listened to the Cherrys' plans for their son's birthday party. 

Cale looked thoughtfully at the Cherrys as they walked away with Kris to confer about Kris playing at a kid's birthday party that was already so over the top, Cale couldn't even grasp what they were doing. Then again, he couldn't really grasp this party. It had started out with people doing some sort of mime stuff -- where you stood around and pretended you were a frozen scene. A tableaux of astrology or something. Adam had loved it, along with seemingly everyone else, well, except for Adam's dad -- he'd had a fun conversation with him while they tried to figure out what the hell was going on. He just wondered when the band would start and he could hopefully talk Lane into dancing. 

"What are you thinking?" Lane asked. She slapped her hand over her mouth, the withdrew it to say, "I'm sorry, I had no right to intrude like that. I've just gotten so accustomed to Adam's people telling you everything..."

"S'kay." Cale smiled. At least she was showing an interest in what he was thinking. That was good. "I was just listening to Kris talk about the Cherrys' kids and remembering how much Kris liked working at the school, how much he likes kids."

"He does," Lane agreed. "He'll be a good dad someday."

"Totally. And out here he'll get to do it. Did you know Arkansas had a law that forbid gay people from adopting? I didn't know that until all that shit happened to Kris and I got my eyes opened. No wonder he wants to stay out here. He's free out here."

"Well, that and the fact that he's afraid he might get boiled in a pot." Lane looked over and nodded approvingly as the band began to play. 

"Yeah, that. But I was thinking that one reason why folks had trouble seeing that Kris was gay was that he often spoke about wanting kids. He'd even said he wanted three. Like he'd planned it out. No wonder folks thought Kris was just waiting for the right woman. Well, no wonder if they didn't pay equal attention to all of the many other hints that had been there. They were blind and now they could see, but they didn't want to see what they were seeing, because it meant seeing something new."

"I'm glad you could see it," Lane said softly. "That's actually quite impressive, given the culture of your hometown." 

"So... just because I'm from Hooterville doesn't mean I'm a red neck hick?" Cale asked eagerly. He moved closer and carefully put his hand on Lane's shoulder. 

"Apparently. But you still live there so..." Lane blushed. "And just because I live in LA and work in the entertainment industry, does not mean I have casual sex." She turned red and hurried off. 

"Why was Lane blushing?" Kris asked, frowning as he passed Lane en route back to Cale. "You better not have been an asshole." 

"Oh, is this what Adam calls hedgehog mode?" Cale laughed. "Don't throw your quills at me, boy. Lane was blushing because we weren't talking about sex and yet she was turning me down. So we both know--" 

"Good for her." Kris nodded. Cale didn't often get turned down and he could use the humility. 

"Why?"

"Well, seriously, like there's a a chance for a real relationship between you two?"

"But I like her--"

"Okay, fine. I know that. But you start going out, it gets serious? What then?" Kris scoffed. "She's not looking for a casual relationship at this point. She's not going to move to Conway, Arkansas and I don't blame her. I'm _from_ there and now that I've gotten a taste of the rest of the world, I would never live there again. Even if they wanted me to." 

Sighing, Cale nodded. He needed to think about his future. What he'd said to Mr. Lambert earlier was true -- he liked Kris and Adam's friends. They were good people. Interesting, maybe even weird, but maybe that was better than knowing everything about everybody and knowing what they were going to do before they did it? 

"You bored back in Conway these days?" Kris asked, having watched Cale's thoughtful expression as he'd looked around the room at their friends. He thought about Cale's eagerness in visiting LA and understood. "Now that I think about it myself, I wonder how even if I hadn't gotten caught, I might have left eventually. I..." He smiled as he watched their crazy friends in their crazy costumes dance to some electro-pop music that made him think he actually was on another planet. "I think I would've gotten bored living there. How 'bout you?" 

"I'm thinking I might be. And truth?" Cale asked and when Kris nodded, he continued. "It's not the same without you. I don't wanna get all sappy, but dude, I miss you. I know you aren't coming back there and I get why..." He sighed, then grinned as Dani danced up to them and tugged on Kris' sleeve, obviously wanting him to rejoin the dancing. "Great costume, Dani."

"I know, right? I had to go on the grapefruit diet for the last two weeks to fit into it, but it's totally worth it."

"I'd say so...." Cale leered exaggeratedly at Dani's cleavage, then winced even more melodramatically when she slapped his stomach. With her wand.

Bopping Kris on the nose with her wand, Dani reminded them, "Hey, it's a party. What's up with the serious faces over here?" 

"Oh, we were talking about how not only shouldn't I move back to Conway, but I don't want to." Kris shook his head. "Even if they wanted me to."

"What would you have to do? Pretend you were straight?" Dani asked curiously.

Cale held up his index finger. "Idea. It's too bad you can't have a baby. Remember when Caylee got pregnant and her parents threw her out?"

Kris nodded and hugged Dani. "But when the baby was born, all was forgiven?" He shook his head and laughed. "Well, that's an idea. But..." He sighed melodramatically. "But I hafta worry. We keep trying, but no luck even though we keep having sex. Adam must be shooting blanks."

Cale blinked, then joined Danielle's loud laughter. "Don't say that!" Dani giggled. "He's my back-up sperm donor."

"Huh?" Cale froze. "You have a _back-up_ sperm donor?"

Kris nodded. "I get it. You know how some people say that if they're not married by a certain age, they'll marry each other? Like, as a safety?"

"Oh, yeah, sure." Cale nodded. "But sperm donor?"

Dani nodded. "Yeah, I don't want to not be a mom because I can't find the perfect guy."

"And Brian isn't the perfect guy?" Kris asked. Dani and Brian had broken up three times over the last year and each time everyone hoped it was the last time. No such luck so far. The dude was here at the party as Dani's plus one. Maybe he'd fall off the cliff. 

"I doubt it." Dani shrugged. "I dunno. At this point, I'm starting to wonder if I'm deliberately not looking for the right guy. Maybe I don't want to get married. I don't know. But I do know that I want to be a mom someday. So if I don't find the right guy to be a father by the time I'm say, thirty-five, then Adam will donate sperm."

"Whhhaaaat?" Kris gaped as he realized Dani was serious. "Adam never said one word about this to me--"

"Does he even know this?" Cale asked when Kris stared wide-eyed at Dani. Kris and Adam seemed to share every thought, no matter how random or insignificant with each other, so he couldn't imagine Adam neglecting to tell Kris that kind of news.

"Well, he agreed to it." Dani admitted with a wry grin, "He was drunk at the time, but I'll hold him to it!"

"You might have to hold him down...." Kris grinned. "I wield a mean turkey baster, by the way."

Cale burst out laughing. "Yeah, right." 

Dani grinned and noted, "Although that would be a great way to keep it all in the family, I doubt either you or Adam would know what to do with the delicate girl parts. So I'll do my own basting."

"Wouldn't that be...." Kris wrinkled his nose and then began sipping his drink. "Awkward? Like you'd have to make yourself into a pretzel?"

"One word: tampon." Dani waited and watched as Cale and Kris both froze, then added, "Or to make it more...understandable to you, Kris -- one word: dildo." 

"Dildo!" Kris choked on his drink, then spluttered as a hand slapped him on the back, then choked again when he heard a male voice say, "Well, Kris, so good to see you again, especially at such an interesting moment in a conversation."

Kris groaned. "Mr. Lambert. Cale -- kill me now. Please."

"With what?" Cale grinned. "A turkey baster in the dining room? Or a dildo in the bedroom?"

"Excuuuuuuuuuse me?" Adam slapped Cale on the back. "Kris doesn't need a dildo, when he has me--"

"Your father is right here!" Kris exclaimed, desperate to change the subject. Or melt into the floor. Or get away. "Hey, aren't you going to dance with me?" 

"That's why I came over. But then I got distracted." Adam shrugged. "What can you expect? You were talking about sex toys."

"I wasn't! Cale was!" Kris pointed out. 

"Actually, Dani started it!" Cale countered. 

"Oh, I'm sure Adam is at fault somehow." Eber teased. 

"Nope. I'm sure it's Neil's fault!" Adam retorted. "It's always his fault." 

_"So, Adam."_

_Adam threw down his napkin and sighed. "What did I do wrong now?"_

_Eber pulled back. He had belatedly realized a few years earlier that the more he pushed Adam, the more Adam pushed back, even if it went contrary to what he really wanted. He'd also realized that Adam took after him that way. "Nothing. At all. You're being paranoid. I'm not wearing my Adam's Dad hat, but my Neil's Dad hat."_

_"Oh good, so Neil's in trouble and not me. I'm all ears." Adam grinned, picked up his napkin and resumed eating his lunch._

_"I think it's... I mean, it might be time to cut Neil loose. What do you think?" Eber asked carefully._

_"Did you discuss this with Geoffrey?" Adam asked, suspicious since Geoffrey had mentioned firing Neil several times. Or maybe he was still a little paranoid._

_"No, of course not. How often do I speak with Geoffrey anyway?" Eber shrugged. It probably served Adam well to be cautious when it came to business, but Geoffrey had always struck him as a decent guy who actually cared about Adam. "But I take it that he's not a Neil fan."_

_Adam shook his head. "Geoffrey likes people who make his life easier, not more difficult. In the end, Neil gets the job done, but first..." Adam rolled his eyes. "We all suffer. And we get complaints from some of the fans."_

_"How about you?"_

_"Honestly, he's been really pissing me off. Not the normal pissed off I am with Neil but..." Adam curled his hand around his fork, then forced himself to loosen his grip. "Mom and Kris and Dani think I'm under enough stress anyway -- they're bugging me to use that swimming pool in my backyard as a stress relief. I'd just like to push Neil into it. And maybe hold him under for a while. I don't like feeling like that, you know? But it's like he's pushing and pushing me..."_

_"Got it." Eber nodded. "What do you think? Do you want to talk this out with me? Can Neil do the work or not? Is he being deliberately difficult or self-sabotaging?"_

_"I think..." Adam paused. "I think Neil is capable of doing the work, but he's frustrated. He thought he was going to find his own way to success and so far he's just my little brother. Or that's how he chooses to see himself. What's that quotation from Anais Nin? 'We see things not as they are, but as we are?' Applies to a lot of situations, including this one. "_

_"Good call," Eber agreed. He opened his mouth to tell Adam to fire Neil, then shut it. Adam had to come to that decision on his own or he wouldn't do it or if he did it, he'd second-guess himself. "What else?"_

_"I think that it's gotten to the point where he's not grateful for the job or happy to do it any more."_

_"And he's not seeing the advantages to doing it."_

_"No. Plus... his problem solving skills are not always tip top because he's easily frustrated. Kris says..."_

_"What does Kris say?" Eber asked quickly. Kris was always so quiet around him that he didn't have a good sense of his personality, other than when the boy got tipsy and crawled all over Adam. All that told him, not that it was a small thing, was that Kris loved Adam, but that tidbit didn't tell him much about the boy's character other than that he had good taste._

_"He said that Neil's skill sets do not match his job."_

_"Is that what he said?" Eber asked skeptically as he saw the amusement in his son's eyes._

_"Well, that's my spin on what he said," Adam admitted with a smile. "He actually said that Neil should get a job for which being an asshole was an asset, like a politician or radio dj."_

_Eber laughed. "I've heard that Kris has a good sense of humor, quick wit. Even if I haven't seen it."_

_"He's a little nervous around you. He clams up. You're my father and he wants you to like him."_

_"He seems to get along well with your mother, though."_

_"I know. I think the difference is due to what an asshole his own father is."_

_"Oh, sure." Eber nodded. "Projection."_

_"He can get anxious sometimes around fathers of a certain age. Due to his father. He expects rejection, so he withdraws. The only guy in your age group he seems comfortable around is Geoffrey." Adam shrugged, then eyed his father. "So don't take it personally."_

_"I'll just be chill."_

_"Yeah, that's you, Dad. Mr. Chill." Adam teased his father with a smile._

 

Eber grinned and elbowed his son, watching Dani, Cale and Kris laughingly argue while Kris shot him nervous looks and blushed in obvious embarrassment. He whispered, "So much for our plan to make Kris feel more comfortable around me." 

Adam shrugged and whispered back, "I think the real answer is that he needs to confront his father and get it over with. Just do it." He frowned, then held up his hands. "That's what I would do, but I keep reminding myself that Kris has a different way of handling problems than I do. Not wrong, but different."

"You keep reminding yourself that because..." Eber paused. "You don't really believe ignoring it is the right idea, do you?"

"Between you and me?" Adam raised his eyebrows. "No, I don't. Kris has a tendency to avoid nastiness and that's not always the best choice. I can see sometimes it might... What?" Adam asked when he saw the skepticism in his father's face.

"No, you can't." Eber laughed. "You're a confrontational kinda guy."

"But I'm not the guy with an asshole for a father." Adam smiled at Eber. Every time he thought about Kris' parents, he said a word of thanks to the universe for giving him the family he had. Now was no exception. 

"I should be careful about not coming on too strong with him," Eber surmised. Not that he thought he had, but Kris obviously had issues to work through. "Do you think I've been pushy with him?"

"Sometimes you're a little pushy." Adam sighed and used his best innocent face. "I, of course, am never pushy at all. C'mon, Kris--" He grabbed Kris' hand and pulled him away. "Let's dance."

"Only if you push." Kris teased. "I like it when you push."

 

_  
"Where are you? Kris!" Adam yelled, his voice muffled as he pulled off his tee-shirt and flung it aside. He'd been gone a week and that was long enough without sex when you were accustomed to having it with Kris on a daily basis. "Where are you? Get in here!" He impatiently tugged off his boots as Kris walked through the doorway into the bedroom. "Finally!"_

_"Hey, you jerkface!" Kris grinned and rushed toward Adam, eager to throw his arms around him. "Geoffrey says that the quid in quid pro quo isn't a blowjob, isn't even British. It's Latin!"_

_"I'm not in the mood to have a discussion about linguistics. I want you." Adam cupped the back of Kris' head with one hand and curled the other around his throat, pushing Kris' chin up as he swooped in and captured Kris' mouth, slanting over him, diving in, lips and tongues sliding and stroking against each other as they made a feast after a famine. Breathing hard, his cock already hard with the need to pound, Adam peeled Kris off of him and gestured toward Kris' shirt. "Take it off. Now."_

_"I...what?" Kris laughed, only half paying attention as he took a deep breath and Adam's scent invaded his lungs and seemed to surround him the way he wanted Adam to. His eyes devoured Adam. Skin. He was naked from the waist up. Skin. He ran his hands around Adam's torso and leaned forward, intent on tasting, when Adam began tugging on his shirt._

_"Not now. This shirt -- get rid of it. It's plaid and it's not your skin. I want it off. Now." Adam frowned at the hideous plaid covering Kris' beautiful skin. "Do it or I'll rip it off."_

_"That's..." Kris felt his cock harden. Ooh, today was gonna be fun. "I won't take it off. I won't."_

_"Fine." Adam smiled. Actually, it was more than fine. He was in the kind of mood in which ripping the clothes off of his boyfriend sounded like damn good foreplay. He lifted his hands and slid his fingertips inside the collar of Kris' tee-shirt, pausing to rub his thumb against the pulse pounding in Kris' neck that matched the thudding beat in his cock, before pulling hard._

__Rrrrripppppp __

_“Oh fuck yeah...” Kris groaned, staring at the remains of his ripped shirt on the floor. Rushing to get naked, he shoved his shorts down while licking his lips as Adam divested himself of his jeans. Naked was all he needed for foreplay after a week of separation._

_“Oh yeah, you’re gonna get fucked. All of those sexy phone calls this week, you little cock tease...” Adam growled. Pushing Kris down onto the bed, he immediately crawled on top of him and grasped his hips in his hands. "I need you now,' he growled in a husky low voice, before he followed his instincts and sliding one hand around the base of Kris' already leaking cock, sucked it into his mouth, groaning at the taste. Kris, Kris... Oh damn, he had missed him so much, needed to connect with him, taste him, take him..._

_"Adam, I.... Oh fuck!" Kris cried out as Adam's mouth engulfed his cock and he swallowed, pulling Kris' cock deeper inside, then swallowed again, before pulling back, licking then sucking him down hard. "Oh, no, not yet, I... Too soooooooon!" Kris shrieked in shock as Adam's intense sucking pulled him over the edge so fast all he could do was gasp and flail around, digging his fingers into Adam's shoulders, planting his feet in the bed and letting himself go, surrendering to the force of their need thrusting into Adam’s mouth, gaping at the sight, the feel of his lips and the rough texture of his tongue. All he could do was hold on. And scream as he came, emptying himself into Adam._

_“Now I need to fill you up.” Adam stuck his finger into his mouth, then pulled it out, smiling when Kris gasped at the sight of his own cum on Adam’s finger, knowing what he was about to do. Pushing Kris’ thighs apart, Adam slid his finger under Kris’ tight balls and circled the hole._

_“Hurry up!” Kris urged, reaching back to find the lube under the pillow where he’d stashed it this morning. “Damn, I need you inside me.” He once again planted his feet and shoved his ass down onto Adam’s finger, gasping with relief when the long digit slid inside, then groaning as the sensation was only briefly satisfying. "More...I need your cock inside me."_

_“Just the start...” Adam leaned over Kris, once again taking his mouth in a hard kiss. The eager way Kris opened his mouth while spreading his legs made Adam’s head spin, as did the little hitch in Kris’ breath when Adam’s finger pressed against his prostate. That should do it, he thought, rubbing it and feeling Kris’ cock begin to fill again._

_"I think..." Kris panted, then lost his train of though as Adam captured his mouth again. God, he was such an amazing kisser, if his cock weren't gearing up again, he could do it all day._

_“God, you taste good, but I’m not done.” Adam pulled back and slapped Kris’ hip. “Turn over.”_

_“Here--” Kris handed Adam the tube before he got on his hands and knees._

_“First things first...” Adam bit Kris’ cheek, then nipped his way across the curve of flesh. “I need all of you...” His lips brushed against the soft skin of Kris’ ass, feeling Kris shiver with anticipation. Kris knew what was coming. Like say, him again. After he did what Adam wanted. He knew it--_

_“Play the game,” Adam ordered, his hands tight on Kris’ hips, pulling him back toward his mouth. He turned his head, licking the inner curve of Kris’ buttock cheek, smiling when Kris involuntarily tried to move himself toward Adam’s mouth. “You want it, don’t you?”_

_“You know I do.” Unable to prolong it any more, Kris burst out, “Are you trying to kill me?”_

_“Say it, hedgehog. Play the Rocky Horror game.” Dipping his head, Adam trailed his tongue along the back curve of Kris' balls, feeling them begin to tighten. Good, Kris was getting as excited as he was again, the little game was giving him enough time to recover so he would come while Adam was inside him._

_“I swear, you bitch...” Kris ground his teeth, then sighed. Adam wasn’t going to give in. He rubbed his face against his shoulder to blot up the perspiration on it, then held still as he felt Adam’s tongue touch him -- was it his tongue or his lips or... he pushed back, groaning when Adam moved away and damn him, love him, needhimsofuckingmuch, moved his hand over Kris’ hips, then between his legs and began stroking his cock. He froze as he heard Adam flip upon the cap on the lube, the sound inordinately loud in the silence of the room broken only by their loud breaths. When Adam did nothing more, Kris gave in. “Okay._ Antici......”

“Pation...” _Adam grinned, as he flicked his tongue out and began licking Kris, knowing that rimming was a surefire way to get Kris ready. And oh, how he wanted him ready. They had a solid week of sex to make up for and he intended to get a good start on it right now before his phone started ringing again. Lifting his head, he whispered, “You taste good. That cum that was in my mouth is now on your--”_

_“Holy fucking SHIT!” Kris yelled. “If you don’t take me right now....” He swallowed hard and felt his legs begin to shake as Adam slid two fingers inside him and ohmigod... whoever put that prostate in there deserved... something, he didn’t know what. “I swear I’m already seeing stars, Adammmmm...”_

_“Well, I want you to see planets, babe,” Adam bit Kris’ ass again, hearing him gasp, then hold his breath as Adam raised himself up, biting the back of Kris’ neck as he bent his knees and slid into Kris with one hard thrust._

_Bracing his hands against the bed, then collapsing into the pillows, Kris pushed back, wiggling, needing to get Adam deeper into him. "Harder!" he cried out. "Shove that big cock of yours.... yeah, like that!"_

_Oh fuck, Kris was so damn tight and he was clamping down, holding him in. Adam groaned, then curled his hands around Kris’ hips and shoved, pulling out, just to hear that gurgling gasp Kris made as Adam’s cock rubbed against his sensitive rim, then shoved in again, harder and harder as Kris pushed back, crying out for more, as Adam gave it to him, then himself, feeling Kris’ body hold him, undulate against him, as they both saw stars._

_"I think..." Adam let out a long breath, kissing Kris' shoulder. "I think I know what I'm going to call my tour. Stars in Our Eyes."_

_"No kidding. Holy..." Kris closed his eyes, feeling the soft kisses Adam was lavishing on his skin, enjoying the moment when the heat of passion turned into the warmth of comfort and love._

_Kissing the back of Kris' neck, Adam began, "You really need to come--"_

_"Give it a rest, man. I just did. Ten minutes, okay?" Kris mumbled, his face still buried in the pillow._

_"No..." Adam laughed, bending over Kris, angling his longer body so that he could nuzzle his face against Kris', kissing his jaw. "Come on tour with me."_

_"Oh, I'd..." Kris froze, his emotions warring with each other. He should go, he really should. But... "But what would I do? What would I be? Your bus boy toy?"_

__

 

"Ask Kris about his costume," Adam hissed at Tommy as a group of them stood near the bar getting refills on their drinks. 

"What's your costume?" Tommy asked Kris. 

"Yeah, what's up with that?: That isn't what Brad was working on," Allison noted. Brad had talked non-stop about costumes for weeks and he'd looked particularly smug about Kris', but his final costume was simple. 

"I like the tights!" Adam bent down and ran his fingertips up Kris' thigh. Oh yeah, he liked the tights. 

"Ugh. I'm a man in tights. I don't know how you talk me into this shit!" Kris grimaced and caught Adam's hand and squeezed it. Truth was, Adam could probably talk him into anything. 

"Oh, I have an idea. I was on the same bus with you two..." Tommy muttered, reaching back for another drink. "But go on about the costume. I'm dying to know. Really." He looked sideways at Adam who was pulling that innocent face shit. 

"Well, I'm in tights because I had a dilemma." Kris glared at Brad. He had no idea what Brad was wearing. None and there was no way he was asking. "I thought I had it all figured out. I thought it was...well, I hate to use the word, but--"

Alisan interrupted. "Cute?" She nodded. "Yeah, I get it. When you're small, you get tired of being cute."

"But you two are so cute. I like cute!" Adam said brightly, then grunted when Alisan stepped on his foot. "Even when you're troll cute."

"Well, Adam likes cute, so cute works. But..." Kris flushed as he looked at Adam's happy face, then automatically scanned down his body. He liked Adam's costume. The fabric was nice and light and he could see the outline of Adam's nipples. Yup. He liked it. Way better than his. Oh that's right. He was supposed to be talking about his costume. "I didn't think of the ram...ram ramifi...."

"Ramifications?" Tommy looked over, then glanced at Alisan. They both shook their heads. Oooh boy, Kris was a little tipsy. He was going to start mauling Adam any second now. 

"Yeah, that." Kris giggled, then took a step closer to Adam and rested his head against Adam's chest. Mmm, that silky fabric was silky. And smooth. And soft. And he could feel Adam's heat through the draped fabric which... he began kissing Adam's chest, then jerked his head up when someone spoke his name. "Huh?"

"Allen! Stop mouthing your boyfriend and tell the story of the costume!" Brad demanded.

"Oh..." Kris raised his head, but leaned his body fully against Adam's and wiggled closer, sighing happily when Adam wrapped his arm around Kris' shoulders. "I thought we'd do a couple's costume."

"Couple's costume? Adam is the water bearer, so you'd be..." Tommy gestured at Kris' costume, that he guessed was supposed to be a water drop.

"Ooh! Let me tell!" Brad exclaimed. "Adam -- as even you, Tommy, you horror movie freak -- can see is wearing an allusion to his astrological sign--"

"Yeah, because we've all had to hear endless lectures about astrology on the tour bus..." Tommy rolled his eyes.

"I don't lecture. I elucidate!" Adam protested. He rocked back on his heels, thrilled he'd been able to pronounce the word. 

"I'm shocked he could say that word given how tipsy he is," Allison giggled.

"Hey, I took a class in college about psych testing and if you want my opinion, astrology is about as good as any high-falutin test!" Kris defended Adam's interest.

"That's okay, hedgehog. Tell them what you were going to be," Adam urged, fighting the urge to giggle. He clamped a hand over his mouth. He might've had a bit too much to drink, but it was his birthday, after all. "Tell them. I'm the water bearer and you were going to be my...."

"Bucket." Kris grimaced and closed his eyes, waiting.

"B b b bucket?" Tommy spluttered, then burst out laughing. "Adam's... bucket."

"His WATER bucket!" Kris retorted, punching Tommy in the arm. 

"Oh damn, that's still so funny..." Adam cracked up. 

"Shut. Up." Kris sighed and looked at Alisan. "Adam laughed for -- no lie -- fifteen minutes. He could not stop laughing. Like now. Apparently it's still freaking _hilarious._ "

"I don't get it..." Allison complained plaintively.

"See, neither did I." Kris glared at Brad. 

"Well, what is it?" Allison demanded, hands on hips.

"Cum bucket!" Kris responded impatiently, then froze, slapping his hand over his mouth as -- of freaking course -- Adam's father walked by, stopped, shook his head and kept walking. "I'm just doomed." Kris poked Brad. "And Jerky Jokester here didn't tell me, he actually helped me make a bucket."

"Helped you? Sweetheart, I made the bucket with no help from you except your measurements."

'Which you were a little too eager to take!" Kris bristled, then subsided when Adam's hand rubbing his back trailed down to his ass. Oh yeah, maybe a trip to the bathroom might be in order. Although crap, he didn't have his step stool. Then again, Adam was really good at pushing him up against a wall and he could wrap his legs around Adam's waist and...

"Well, I had to know how I measured up." Brad shrugged, then glancing down, widened his eyes. "Didn't have that to measure though..." As everyone followed Brad's gaze, then laughed, Kris blushed.

"Oh crap..." Kris turned his face back into Adam's chest.

"He was a hot little bucket though," Adam said while tickling his fingers along Kris' ribcage. 

"How do you make a bucket hot?" Alisan asked curiously.

Hugging Kris, Adam said with a smile, "By putting Kris in it."

"Ow!" Tommy shrieked.

"What is it?" Alisan asked, rubbing her ear.

"I think I just had a spontaneous cavity from how freaking sweet Adam was. Ow!" Tommy held his jaw and moaned loudly. 

"Asshole!" Kris laughed and swiped at the back of Tommy's head. 

Tommy laughed, while Allison craned her head and looked at the stage where Cale was waving in an attempt to get Kris' attention. "Hey, Kris. Isn't it about time for your birthday gift to Adam?"

"What're you singing?" Alisan asked.

"Well, Starry Starry Night, of course." Kris took Adam's hand and pulled him toward the stage. "At least one good thing about you working so hard was that I had plenty of time to redo the song my way."

 

__

_Kris smiled gleefully as he put his guitar down by the front door. He had written a damn good song and couldn't wait to tell Adam about it. Tilting his head, he listened and heard a faint sound of water splashing._

_Adam blew a long breath, then climbed out of the pool. He really needed to get credit from Kris and his mom for following their advice and swimming to relieve tension and, he thought more happily, burn calories._

_**Bang** _

_Looking up as the French door banged closed, Adam sighed with relief when Kris stepped onto the covered patio. "Hey, baby. You're home. Thank god."_

_"If you're in the pool, that meeting with Geoffrey didn't go so hot," Kris observed as he snatched up one of the towels stacked in a patio cabinet. Smiling as he and Adam walked toward each other, he reached for Adam and began drying him off._

_Adam sighed blissfully as Kris rubbed him with the towel. "It's not the meeting with Geoffrey, it was the meeting with Neil afterwards."_

_"Did you fire his sorry ass?" Kris blurted, then clapped his hand over his mouth._

_Adam blinked, then began to laugh at Kris' bluntness, the tension easing from his shoulders. "Oh man, you are a better stress relief than an hour of swimming. C'mere."_

_Kris tossed the towel aside, opened his arms and wrapped them around Adam, careless of the water soaking into him. Who cared? His clothes would dry. Nudging his hip against Adam's groin, he suggested, "I know an even better way I can relieve your stress."_

_Nuzzling into Kris' neck, Adam bit the skin under his lips. "I know you do. I know...you... I want you."_

_"I always want you too..." Kris kissed along Adam's collarbone, then moved his lips down over Adam's chest, smiling as he felt the hard, fast beat of his heart. "But did you..."_

_"Yes. I fired Neil." Adam cupped Kris' ass and pulled him up against him._

_"Praise the Lord and pass the syrup!" Kris laughed in relief, slapping Adam's butt._

_"Syrup? Oh, kitchen sex?" Adam winked and pulled Kris into the kitchen, right off the patio._

_"You're not serious..." Kris said slowly, even as he tugged his shirt off and tossed it in the general direction of...something. Who cared? Adam wasn't really... Oh damn. Adam had pulled off his swim shorts, tossed them into the sink and was pulling out a small tin of real maple syrup -- out of a cabinet. "Hey, that's the expensive stuff!"_

_"You're worth it." Watching Kris shoved down his jeans, Adam smiled slowly and jacked his own cock. Pouring a small dollop of syrup onto his fingers, he slathered it around the tip of his cock. "Well?"_

_"You're serious...." Kris knelt and bent his head, moving forward and slowly laving his tongue all around the head of Adam's cock, licking and sucking, teasing the tip as it leaked more of Adam's own liquid, mixing with the syrup. Oh god, he was never going to be able to taste syrup again without getting an erection. Who cared? He closed his eyes and moaned as he took the head into his mouth and sucked. "Mmm. And sweet too."_

__

 

Striking the last note, thanking god he'd hit it because damn that song was hard, Kris smiled, then sighed at the excited look on Adam's face as he clapped like a crazy person. He ignored the applause from everyone else, only caring about what Adam thought and given the look in his eyes... he was happy. So it was all good. He'd made Adam happy and that was what was important. 

"That was wonderful...." Adam nearly yelled, over the applause as Kris finished his song and rushed into Adam's open arms. "But... you already gave me my gift in the bathroom earlier." He smirked.

"Did not!" Kris protested, then rubbed up against Adam. "I thought about it..."

"But it would've been like deja vu after the tour," Tommy teased. 

Adam sighed. "That was the best tour ever."

 

__

_"The tour -- " Adam looked over at Kris as they brushed their teeth after taking a shower the next morning; he still felt as though there was syrup still somewhere on him, even even after a shower the night before and this morning. That maple syrup was sticky._

_"Too bad Madonna already called a tour, 'Sticky and Sweet'." Kris grinned, his mouth white with toothpaste. "Because now that's gonna be a great memory."_

_Touching the back of Kris' neck, Adam nodded. Kris liked to store up memories, put them in a bucket or something, to carry with him. Probably a result of his past. "I still like Stars in Our Eyes."_

_"Oh, that's great too. And I like all the ideas you were showing me the other day!" Kris agreed enthusiastically. "Can't wait to see the show. Are you gonna writhe on the stairs again? Ooh-- wait, you could do Stairway to Heaven as an encore!"_

_"Well, aren't you full of ideas?" Adam teased._

_"I'd rather be full of you," Kris teased back, running his free hand along his backside._

_"You could be. On tour. Every night. Morning--"_

_"I'm not going on tour as your groupie!"_

_"You don't have to. Now that I fired Neil, I need a replacement. Come with me."_

_"Are you seriously asking me to take that job?" Kris asked. That would really make Neil's head explode. A total plus. And then there was the small matter of... He put his toothbrush down and spat into the sink. "What do Geoffrey and Lane think?"_

_"Geoffrey thinks it would be..." Adam paused and used a British accent. "Bloody brilliant!"_

_“I bet he did..." Kris muttered, rinsing his mouth, then wiping his lips with the back of his hand._

_"And of course, Lane wants her BFF along. Get real." Adam shook his head and rinsed his mouth. Honestly, this kind of stubborn was getting beyond annoying. Was he this annoying when he was stubborn? Surely not!_

_Kris smiled at Adam's irritation. Now maybe Adam had an idea how Kris felt when he was being ridiculously stubborn. “I’m not sure...” He paused. What should he say? How... What would Adam think..._

_"What's the problem? When I asked you to go with me on tour, you said and I quote..." Adam dropped his voice and grabbed Kris' hands. "'What would I dooooooo?' So I"m offering you a job, a real job, doing real and necessary work."_

_"I don't want to be a charity case!"_

_"You're not. But you are being irrational." Adam held onto Kris' hands tightly and warned him, "Don't make me wrestle you and hold you down."_

_Kris grinned. “Why would that be a bad idea?”_

_Laughing, Adam bent and grabbed Kris, flinging him over his shoulder. He stomped into the bedroom and tossed Kris onto the bed, laughing again when Kris grinned in apparent delight, wiggled around and held out his arms. Kris did love to be manhandled. Adam smiled back and threw himself down on top of Kris, breaking his landing with his forearms. Sliding his legs around Kris’ hips and snapping him tightly against his bigger body, he dropped on top of Kris, holding in a groan as he focused on the fight at hand rather than the warm skin and firm body under his. He slid his hands around Kris’ back and held him even tighter. “So, listen up. Listen to me and not the sound of your own overwrought pride. I’m offering you a job. A real job. Not charity.”_

_“You wouldn’t pay me more than Neil, right?” Kris wrapped his arms around Adam’s shoulders and bucked up against him, surprised when Adam did not undulate against him, but instead pressed harder. He hissed in a small breath and felt blood fill his cock. “For you know...”_

_"Yeah, I know. You’re not a whore. You’re just mine. Get over it.” Adam impatiently swooped down and bit Kris’ bottom lip sharply enough to make him gasp, then captured his mouth with dominating strokes of his tongue. When Kris’ fingers on his shoulders were pressing hard enough to leave a bruise, Adam lifted his head. “Would it make you feel better if I didn't pay you?" Adam asked. "If you had no income for doing a job?"_

_Kris opened his mouth and then rolled his eyes at himself. "That sounds stupid."_

_"You said it, not me."_

_Kris twisted his mouth and nudged Adam with his knee. Nothing. "You're not moving, damn it."_

_"Nope." Adam pressed down into Kris' body. "You feel good underneath me. I can lie here on top of you all day."_

_"You would too, to prove a point. God, you're so damn stubborn. And bossy." Kris sighed. Adam could be such a damn immovable object. He hoped he never pissed him off, seriously pissed him off because Adam would be hard to move. Which was why he was currently between a rock and a hard place, okay literally since Adam's body was like a rock on top of him and his own cock was getting harder by the moment and after all, beyond anything else, he wanted to go and Adam wanted him to go. So it was all good, no matter what had happened before and... "Okay, okay. So... I go on the tour and do Neil’s job... and get paid for it.”_

_“And you can also use your free time...” Adam loosened his hold enough to slide his leg over and part Kris’ thighs._

_“To fuck in the bus?” Kris asked with a smile, that turned into a moan as Adam’s fingers slid down his back to part his ass cheeks. Being in the bus with Adam after a show... only something he'd fantasized about since that concert in Milwaukee._

_“Well, that. And didn’t you say Tommy offered to teach you the electric bass? Because you could get more session work?”_

_“Yeah, whatever," Kris agreed, more focused on pushing his cock against Adam's stomach than his career prospects. "And maybe we can stock up on that edible glitter to bring along?”_

_“Buckets of it...” Adam agreed._

 

"I like the makeup on Adam tonight," Kris told Sutan. "Those fake drops of water going down his arms are awesome -- they look so real." 

"Air brushing with a soupcon of glitter. Speaking of which, I was expecting you to join us in the screened-off area." Sutan raised an eyebrow. "The only night you missed Adam in make up was the night you had food poisoning."

"Ugh, don't remind me." Kris wrinkled his nose. "It was so embarrassing having those pictures of Adam carrying me into the ER tweeted all over the freaking world." And even then, he hadn't heard from his mother. 

Sutan cooed, "You looked like a damsel in distress..." 

"Crap. Don't remind me." 

"Okay. I'll change the subject." Sutan nodded as Lane joined them. "Hey, Laney. I was just trying to think about something more embarrassing for Kris on the tour than the pap pics of him being a sick wittle baby."

"Oh, you mean like the time Monte was looking for Adam and opened the door to the green room thinking you were just doing his makeup?" Lane grinned, then laughed loudly when Kris gasped.

"Evil! You're pure evil! We weren't ever going to speak of that!" Kris swatted at the glittery stars that bopped around Lane's head. She must have some weird headband thingee going on. Unable to reach, he jumped slightly and nodded in satisfaction when he hit one of the stars. 

"Why not?" Sutan shrugged. "It's not like it put you off your game. You were back in the green room watching me do Adam's make up the next night."

"He can't resist. He's powerless in the face of glitter on Adam's body," Lane teased. For all that Kris was a plain Jane when dressing himself, he had what might be a fetish about seeing Adam in glitz. "He's like a glitter zombie." 

 

__

_"You're rather... intense..." Adam whispered to Kris during the dress rehearsal for the tour as Sutan turned to rummage through one of his kits for a blue faux jewel in the shape of a star to put on his forehead. Kris had been staring at him ever since he'd entered the green room -- a fancy name for a tiny cement-block cell of a room with a huge mirror and way too many lights. He'd unscrewed half of them when both he and Sutan had started to sweat from the heat the Hollywood-style light bulbs were generating. But now he was starting to sweat from the look Kris was giving him._

_"Is that edible glitter?" Kris licked his lips. The light dusting of glitter on Adam's arms and chest would only be visible when he took off his cape for the second act of the show and would be covered when he donned a cobalt blue and black jacket later on. Or at least that was the plan right now. Adam wasn’t entirely sure about the glitter on his skin, which he thought was stupid. If ever a guy was meant to gleam in the stage lights, it was Adam Fucking Lambert._

_"No!" Adam laughed in delight at Kris' obvious interest. He glanced down Kris' body to his jeans. Oh. Really obvious. Uh-oh. They didn't have time. "Not for the stage. Edible glitter is water soluble and I sweat too much when I'm performing -- the glitter would just pour off of me. Yuck." He nodded as Sutan returned with the jewel and hovered over his face deciding where to adhere it._

_"So how do you remove it?" Kris asked, reaching out to touch Adam's arm, then reluctantly pulling it back. He didn't want to screw anything up. That was most certainly not his job. "Is that part of my job?"_

_"Well, it wasn't Neil's." Sutan laughed. "But I'm thinking your job description might be a little different?"_

_Adam held his breath, waiting for Kris to go all hedgehog at the intimation that he was a paid groupie, but to his surprise, Kris just kept staring at him and said nothing. Although his eyes were saying enough to be a Shakespearean play and the words were speaking straight at his cock._

_Sutan chuckled softly. "Your boy is making you sweat more than those stupid lights."_

_"Tell me about it." Adam blew a long breath up over his face, wishing he had a fan. Or a camera to capture forever the look on Kris' face. "Kris, I--"_

_"You look fucking hot!" Kris exclaimed, moving his eyes from the strip of Adam’s chest up over his neck to his mouth, damn... that mouth, those lips, and those eyes. "And... glowing. What kind of glitter is that?"_

_"Oh, honey, that's not from the glitter," Sutan explained with a smile. "That's because of the way you look at him. And if you looked in the mirror right now, you'd see the same effect on your face for the same reason. There's no make up that can compete with the combination of love and lust." Looking from Kris to Adam, Sutan pursed his lips, closed his kit and nodded. “I think... I’m done here. Don’t forget, Adam -- we’re timing this. You have twenty minutes before you get five minutes.” He quick stepped toward the door and pulled it open._  
   
“Got it.” Adam nodded as Kris stepped between his legs and ran his hands up Adam’s thighs. 

_“Do you remember the night of the Jingle Ball in LA? I should’ve known then... You’re irresistible like this...” Kris’ fingers hurriedly pulling at the waistband of Adam’s pants for the first set. “Oh yeah, I like velcro...” he muttered as he pulled back the tab._

__Scccccccraaaaaaaatcccccccccccch __

_“Fast...” Kris whispered, sliding the zipper tab down, then spreading his hands over the skin revealed. Skin. His to touch and lick and kiss... Every day, every night. Oh hell yeah, every night._

_“Fast is of the essence...” Adam murmured, watching Kris’ hands on his stomach, stroking the short hairs there. He lifted his own hands to run them through Kris’ hair, wondering if Kris was really going to suck him and oohh fuck, he was. He held his breath as Kris pulled his hardening cock out and immediately bent down and sucked the head of his cock into his mouth._

_“Mmm...” Kris took a deep breath. “I like your essence. The scent of skin and sex...” Looking up, he blinked as the strong overhead lights made the glitter on Adam’s skin flash and gleam. “And sparkles.”_

_“Sparkles have a...” Adam moaned as Kris’ very clever mouth worked its own magic. “Have a scent?”_

_“Mmmm....” Kris smiled as the sound he’d made had apparently made an arousing vibration against Adam’s cock given the way it had hardened even more in his mouth and how Adam’s hands were gently pushing him down. He shivered. He loved it when Adam directed him like that. He flicked his eyes upward, taking in the sight of Adam seated in the chair, his eyes intent, his hair pumped up to the ceiling it looked like and all that glitter, that star jewel on his forehead. He looked like some king of a starry universe and... yet, he was Kris’. All his... he vowed to hold onto the fiery center of his world as he stared upward._

_“Oh god, you made me fly...” Adam moaned later when Kris finished licking him clean, lifted his head and then licked his lips. He stared in bemusement as Kris rubbed his own cock, then sighed and reached out to re-dress Adam._

_“Five minutes!” Lane yelled through the door. “I swear, you two. You will not be doing this every night...”_

_“Every night, oh hell yeah.” Kris grinned as he rummaged around in Adam’s bag for a stick of gum. “That  
was amazing. You looked so amazing, like out of this world... I am so doing that every night.”_

_“But you’re...” Adam nodded toward the bulge in Kris’ jeans. Nicely tight jeans since somehow all of Kris’ loose jeans had gotten lost in the move to Adam’s house._

_“So? You’ll owe me an extra orgasm after the show.” Kris took a deep breath and thought of Pearline’s hair. Yup. That worked. He watched as Adam vaulted out of the chair, trailing glitter, reminding him of the first time they met. When he’d fallen head over heels and... he was still falling, but now safe in the knowledge that Adam would always catch him. Or as long as he didn't screw up. “In the bus, right? We’re private in the bus?”_

_“Yes. I, I mean we will have our own bedroom in the back.” Adam grinned and took Kris’ hand to squeeze it as they exited the room and began to walk down the hall. “Did I tell you how excited I am that you’re coming on tour with me?”_

_“Well, I’m not coming yet...” Kris teased._

_“Well, that should give you more time to practice the electric guitars!” Tommy cried out from behind them, giggling as he hurried past to get to the stage before Adam, per usual._

_"You know, he really doesn't have any ass to speak of," Adam said absently as he ran through the set list in his mind._

_"No kidding. And -- Oh hey -- that reminds me,” Kris noted. “You don't glom on Tommy."_

_Still fussing over the set list, Adam nodded. "I haven't done that in a while."_

_"I know." Kris glared at up Adam. "Just making sure we're clear on the ground rules."_

_“You’ve made that crystal clear,” Adam told him, then stopped. “Wait -- that blowjob in the green room wasn’t about--”_

_“No. It was about me wanting to suck your cock while you’re all glittery. It’s like ... a fantasy.”_

_“Oh.” Adam smiled. Kris had fantasies about him. Unbelievable._

_“Are you blushing?” Kris asked with a grin._

_“Who me? Never.” Changing the subject quickly, Adam reminded Kris, “So, there won’t be any glomming on Tommy.”_

_Elbowing Adam, Kris asked, "Does Tommy know? Because sometimes, he was the one who initiated."_

_Adam laughed. "The night he met you, he told me, 'So no more kissing during Fever, right?'"_

_"Really?" Kris asked in surprise._

_"Really. Tommy totally respects you. You know that."_

_"But... who are you going to kiss?" Kris asked, anxious. He did not want to see Adam kissing anyone. But him. Even for stage purposes._

_"How about no one?" Adam rolled his eyes. "I change the set list up every time. I didn't even do Fever last tour. And I won’t do it this tour unless I have a sudden urge to do so. I’ve only said that approximately a katrillion times." He put his hand on Kris' arm and squeezed hard. "Have a little faith in me."_

_"I do, it's just... but..." Kris frowned. He didn't know why he was arguing the point, but there he was, arguing the point. "You still did kiss Tommy or... do other things with him. And the fans love it."_

_"The fans will understand that I no longer engage in those shenanigans since I have a partner." Adam shrugged. "Or...." He brushed his thumb across Kris' bottom lip. "I could do like Bruce Springsteen used to do--"_

_"What the hell do you know about Bruce Springsteen?"_

_"My knowledge is vast."_

_"So's your ego." Kris stared at Adam suspiciously. "You've been using Google again. You had an idea and researched to find stuff to bolster your argument."_

_"Sez you. Focus. The point is he used to pull his wife out to dance with him during Dancing in the Dark. I could pull you out for a dance or a kiss."_

_"WHAT? Are you out of your fucking mind?" Kris shrieked and ran his fingers through his hair. "In public? On a stage? On a tour? Where all those people have cameras? And access to YOUTUBE?"_

_Adam laughed. Kris' face was so red and his hair was standing up, all prickly. "Okay, fine, hedgehog. I kiss no one. No shenanigans with anyone."_

_Kris growled. "I know you. You don't give in that easy. You're going to try to con me into it."_

_"Of course not," Adam scoffed. "I'm not manipulative."_

_"You're not manipulative,” Kris agreed. “You're relentless."_

_"You don't complain about that quality when you're lying there gasping for breath after I've given you three orgasms in a row."_

_"I..." Kris swallowed hard and wiped his suddenly damp forehead. "Yeah. But... this. But you won't succeed," he promised. "I am not going to kiss you on stage. In public. In front of cameras."_

_"Are you ashamed to kiss me in public?"_

_Kris' mouth dropped open. "No! How can you say that....Waitaminit. ...I'm not gonna fall for that!"  
_

 

"Oops! I took a tumble!" Kris giggled as he wiggled around on Adam. "And landed right in your lap. Whodathunkit?"

"Oh, I dunno... Anyone who's ever spent more than ten minutes with the two of you in private?" Allison asked, elbowing Brad as they sat down in the planetarium to watch the show. Big surprise -- Kris was wiggling on Adam's lap. 

"Or anyone who ever watched those videos of you planting one on Adam?” Brad smirked. “Where was it? Houston or Hawaii?” 

Allison giggled. “I remember that! It was the night Monte had to go to that funeral, so Tommy filled in for him and you filled in for Tommy. Poor Monte, but it was special for you." 

“Yeah. It was special indeed watching Kris grind up on Adam like he was going to fuck him right there. Like tonight. Which needs more glitter.” Brad pulled back his arm, startled when Kris suddenly reached out and clamped his hand around Brad's wrist.

"Do not throw glitter. I'll have to pay extra for glitter clean up in the planetarium!" Kris shook his head. "Seriously."

Adam frowned. "How did you..." He froze. Kris would not appreciate having his finances examined in  
front of others. Hell, he wouldn't even talk about them with Adam in private. But he wondered again how Kris could afford any of this. Oh, wait, he’d done the planning with Lane, so she’d probably fixed it all up. He hoped she had. "I... hope you're charging it to one of my accounts. I'm sure Geoffrey or Hannah can find a way to write some it off as a business expense."

"Oh, who cares? Money is so déclassé a subject!" Brad declared. 

"I have to agree," Kris said quickly. "Where's Lane, anyway?"

Allison shrugged. "Telling Dani why that stupid grapefruit diet of hers is stupid."

"Yeah, no d'uh." Brad rolled his eyes. "On to something way more interesting. Like, Kris' PDAs."

"Why?" Kris whined, then yelped when Adam groped his ass under cover of the darkened planetarium. He wiggled back into Adam's hand, then curled into his body, nuzzling into Adam's neck, rubbing his nose up and down the warm skin before sighing, then slowly licking the skin under his lips. 

"Because I can give you pointers," Brad teased. "Let's start with the tongue..."

'"Oooh, let's not." Allison shook her head. 

 

_  
"So. Kris." Tommy grinned. "I left a comment on that YouTube."_

_Wiping the sleep from his eyes, Kris blinked blearily. He rolled onto his side in the bed and looked up at Tommy. Even without his glasses, he could tell that Tommy was having way too much fun for the morning after the night before. They'd had quite a party last night; he barely remembered falling into the bed on the bus... or maybe Adam had carried him. He sat up and rubbed his eyes and held back a wince as certain muscles protested the movement. Oh yeah... he did remember Adam fucking him into the next morning. "What YouTube?"_

_"The one from last night that best shows you kissing Adam on stage. It was a hard choice, given how many vids got posted."_

_"Whaaaaat?" Kris blinked again and flopped his hand around the built-in nightstand next to the bed, looking for his glasses._

_"Looking for these?" Tommy held the glasses out. As Kris snatched them and glared, Tommy grinned. He shoved Kris' knee. "Move over. I've got my computer loaded up and ready to go. Just for you. Because I love you so."_

_"Why are you here? Why do you exist?" Kris asked plaintively as Tommy sat down next to him on the bed._

_"Getting all existential so early, Kris? I'm totally impressed." Tommy laughed, then grunted when Kris punched him in the arm. "Also impressed with your bicep curling."_

_'Where is Adam?" Kris groaned as he heard the familiar sounds of Fever tinnily playing from Tommy's crap laptop._

_"Off getting you coffee, spoiled brat. There's a Starbucks around the corner."_

_"I think I'm gonna need that coffee," Kris moaned._

_It had seemed surreal -- Adam deciding to play Fever the night Kris had stepped in for Tommy and all of those videos from the GlamNation Tour went swirling through his head and suddenly there he was, fingers fumbling on the guitar strings as Adam began to talk, saying something about the boy who really gave him fever. He had gaped in shock -- which was, of course, clearly shown on the video, great! Tommy was smirking at him and damnit! Adam was his! Adam had begun to sing and he still couldn't believe he was on stage with Adam Fucking Lambert, who was ohmigod dancing over to him and those pants had been awfully tight and his mouth had been so damn kissable and Tommy was still smirking and the fans were screaming about kissing and the next thing he knew, he'd been wrapped around Adam, planting one on those lips and Adam had bent him backward, kissing him back until they were both breathless. Or he was. Adam hadn't missed a beat and had gone instantly into his old choreography, singing away like Kris hadn't been, as Lane said, totally gobsmacked. And Tommy was still smirking._

_"I can't believe I did that -- totally forgot where I was and launched myself at him." He stared at the screen and then let out a small shriek. "Ohmigod! That wasn't a dream... Was that tongue?"_

_Tommy smirked. "More to the point, was that the plaidbulge?"_

_"Plaid bulge? Huh?"_

_"Well, if Adam has the glambulge, what would yours be? Since Adam likes glam and you like plaid, yours must be--"_

_"None of your fucking business!" Kris kneed Tommy’s ribcage, frowning when Tommy just laughed._

_"Oh, but it's everyone's business when we can all see it. In full color. On YouTube. Wait -- let me put the video to full screen size and-- Ouch!" Tommy yelped as Kris kneed him in the ass, the continued laughing. "Did you see my comment?"_

_"How could I miss it?" Kris snapped. "Considering that it got the most thumbs-up and is at the top of the page? ‘Thanks for having sex with Adam. Love, Tommy!’ Seriously, dude!" He shoved Tommy away and got out of bed, stumbling slightly as he lurched toward the tiny bathroom to take care of business. He was going to find a way to pay Tommy back..._

_“Nice bruises on your ass, by the way...” Tommy called out as Kris appeared in the bathroom door. He laughed and darted toward the door leading out to the main area of the bus. "Could we lift Adam's fingerprints off your ass?"_

_“I’m gonna beat your ass!” Kris glared and hurried after Tommy, determined to keep from laughing._

_“The two of you...” Monte rolled his eyes as he stood chatting with Adam about the funeral he'd had to attend while standing in the small living area of the bus. Kris and Tommy were like squabbling brothers. There was deep affection between them, as well as a deep need to drive the other absolutely crazy. How Tommy had ever managed to teach Kris how to play the electric bass with all the fussing they did at each other, he’d never know._

_Adam raised an eyebrow. "Hedgehog, did you notice you were naked?"_

_"Oh fuck!" Kris yelled and ran back into the bedroom. "Fuck my life!"_

_"My pleasure." Adam winked at Tommy and shoved the two coffees at him._

_"I don't need coffee! I need better earplugs!" Tommy retorted.  
_

 

**BOOM!**

"The universe began with a big bang!" Kris intoned in his deepest voice over the recorded voice of the planetarium program as they watched the universe form over their heads. He and Dani had watched the program way too many times when they were consulting with the Observatory's education director and events planner about how to customize it for the party. Seeing Adam's rapt face, Kris decided it had been worth every minute and every penny. "I'd rather you gave me a nice hard big bang. The restroom would do."

Adam laughed and cuddled Kris on his lap as to his surprise the regular program changed to a story about the astrological signs in the sky and their meanings and referenced him by name. "I can't believe what you all did. This has been an amazing night. Thanks seem inadequate, but..." He tilted Kris' face up and gave him a slow, sweet kiss. "Just as are any thanks I could make to the universe for sending you into Starbucks that day." 

"To the universe? How about--" Kris shook his head. "What was your horoscope that day, by the way?" he asked, running his fingers along Adam's shoulder and down over his chest. Giving a careful glance around and smiling as the announcer referred to their guests by name as she talked about their signs, he nodded and pinched Adam's nipple. 

"Ahhh..." Adam shifted in his seat, pushing his groin up against Kris' butt. "What's important is the future. So the astrologist you guys hired to read charts for everyone said my next year is full of changes..."

"I'm... still here though, right?" Kris asked anxiously. Not that he believed in astrology, but still. Life was uncertain. One minute you were safe and the next minute you were on the outside looking in. "Right?"

"'The fault lies not in our stars, dear Brutus..." Adam grinned and rubbed Kris' messy hair. He was drunk enough to be amazed he was remembering Shakespeare. "I mean, 'Dear Hedgehog, but in ourselves.'" 

"What does that mean?"

"It means that regardless of what our stars say, we are in control of our destinies."

"Well, good." Kris wiggled against Adam's hard cock. "If I'm in control, then my destiny is to stay right here forever."


	33. Well, I can mash potato, Well, I can do the twist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTES: We are now moving onto the year after Adam's 31st birthday party. The Dunkelman to which Adam refers is Ryan Seacrest's original co-host on American Idol's first season, Brian Dunkelman, who was let go before the second season. 
> 
> The chapter title are lines from the song, "Do you love me?" by the Contours.

**Chapter 33: Well, I can mash potato, Well, I can do the twist**

"Kris, why are you still working here?" John asked. He shoved clean glasses under the bar and stood up, determined to say his piece. "Don't get me wrong -- glad to have you back. Those two college kids who filled in while you were on tour didn't really fit in and you do. Everyone likes you."

"Well, not everyone. Bud over there is pretty sure I'm gonna go to hell." Kris nodded in the direction of the corner table.

"Not because you're gay. Because you don't give him free drinks. He thinks I'm going to hell too." John laughed. "I stay up at night worrying about it. But my point is -- I've heard you sing enough now, I've seen you on the YouTubes at Adam's concert, playing." He paused when a customer came up to the bar and ordered a scotch.

"You saw that?" Kris asked as he handed John a glass. 

"Yessireee!" Bud called out. "John hooked his computer up to the big screen and we watched you plant one on your boyfriend."

"Given how big that screen is, it really was life sized. For Kris, anyway," John teased.

"Ugh. Is there a point to this?" 

"Yeah. My point was that as much as we'd miss you, you don't _need_ to work here when Adam  
is--" 

"I'm not living off of Adam!" Kris snapped back. 

"Oh brother, here we go again... Just like when Adam first asked him to go on tour." Rick, one of the regulars, muttered under his breath. "I'm not a boy toy, I'm not a whore..."

John smirked and slid a bottle of beer in Rick's direction. "Now, _that_ deserves a free drink."

"I swear, I might as well be back in Conway given how everyone gives their opinion on my life!" Kris sighed, then realizing what he'd said, smiled slowly. "Hunh. I might not have a hometown any more, but I do have y'all."

"Is that why you're still here?" John asked as a lightbulb gleamed over his head. "Because this is safe and comfortable, like that crummy ugly chair of yours?"

"Why does everyone pick on my chair?"

"Because it's crummy and ugly?" Rick asked. When Kris glared at him, he shrugged. "Hey, Adam's talked about it, John -- who wouldn't notice the design on anything other than a new beer label to save his life noticed it, so it's gotta be ugggggleeeee." 

"Yeah, I've seen it," a voice came from the door. "It looks like someone vomited curry mushrooms. From circa 1975. And then rubbed them into the fabric."

"Neil?" Kris asked in surprise, then suspicion as he watched Neil Lambert stomp across the old vinyl flooring as if it personally offended him. Then again, everything seemed to offend Neil. "What are you doing here?"

"Don't mash your potatoes," Neil retorted as he sat down on a stool. "I come in peace."

"Yeah, right." Kris crossed his arms over his chest. 

"Seriously. I...uh..." Neil rubbed his face and decided to dive in. "I want your advice."

"You want _my_ advice?" Kris rubbed his own face, hiding his grin. NastyNeil wanted his help? Life was good. 

"Is there an echo in here?" Rick asked, grinning at John. Life had gotten way more interesting since Kris had started dating Adam and gotten a life. A life that often seemed to walk right into the bar. He wasn't so sure John was doing the right thing trying to push Kris out of the nest. Why, they might have to start watching E! or something to keep up with him. 

"Is there an asshole in here?" Kris peered around, then gasped, held his nose and pointed at Neil. "Ohmigod, there is! Peee-eww! What a stink!"

Ignoring the snickers of Kris' little bar entourage, Neil decided on Plan B, the roundabout route. "Speaking of stinky assholes, is Dani still going out with dickwad?"

"They've broken up. Again. We're all hoping it's the last time," Kris unbent enough to admit.

Neil nodded. "The last time I was in San Diego, I ran into her mom at In-N-Out and she told me they all hated him too. What did Dani see in him?"

"Maybe he was really great in the sack." Kris shrugged. Seemed like everyone had a friend or relative with lousy taste in significant others. At least Brian actually did have his moments; he could be fun to be around. Then invariably, he'd just turn into, as Neil said, a dickwad.

"Ewww! My eyes!" Neil covered his face. "My ears. She was the first girl I was ever in love with," Neil admitted. "In between seeing her as my big sister."

"You were in love with her in between times of seeing her as your big sister? I'm pretty sure that's perverted and sick..."

"You'd know about perverted familial relationships, being from Alabama and all. Isn't it legal there to be your own grandpa?"

"Arkansas."

"What _ever_." Neil shrugged.

"You really know how to win friends and influence people." Kris reached for a glass to make Neil his preferred drink, then stopped. Nope. Neil was going to have to ask -- nicely -- for anything he wanted.

"Adam got all those genes. Totally unfair. It's easy for him. Everyone likes him," Neil complained.

"And yet you didn't seem to like him--"

Blurting out the truth, Neil said, "That's not true. I projected my own self-loathing onto him." Damn it, Neil thought, just like Adam had said during their last awful conversation when he'd fired Neil. It was his own fault though. "I.. screwed up."

"Repeatedly."

"Repeatedly." Neil sighed and forced himself to patience. One truth he knew about Kris was that for all that he was easy-going, he could be just as stubborn as Adam. 

"There _is_ an echo. But your screw ups and general assholicness--"

"Assholicness isn't a word."

"It is now. And tell me again -- did you want my help? If so, heads up. Correcting me isn't going to get you what you want and being Admiral Asshole is why he fired your sorry ass. And isn't speaking to you." 

"Which is why I'm here. I want your professional opinion. And by the way, I apologize. Really, I do."

"Professional?" Kris asked, confused by the word and by the apology. Neil had a tendency to find a way to do everything but apologize. Hmmm.

"Yeah. You're a professional bartender. You listen to people's problems and give them advice. And Lane used to tell me -- back when she was speaking to me -- that you usually know what you're talking about." Neil winced. He probably shouldn't have qualified with the word, 'usually'. It wasn't politic. And everyone had blind spots -- Kris' was his family back in Bigot Burg. "Seriously, I could use your advice. If you'd be willing to help. I'll apologize again, because I know I need to." Neil paused again, straightened his spine and asked, "Please?"

Kris shook his head. Neil had said 'please'? This interaction was actually getting interesting. "Oh, I don't know...I'm not qualified." He hid his smirk.

"You can't be any worse than that person who cleanses Brad's chakras. Which frankly, sounds scary. And quite possibly, invasive or hallucinogenic."

"Frankly, almost anything to do with Brad is kinda scary." Kris grinned. "Maybe you should be asking him for advice."

"I did. He told me that you know Adam better than he does."

"He did?" Kris' eyes widened. "Humph. Mr. I'm-Adam's-Ex-and-Know-Everything.... Humph." 

"He wants you to think he knows everything," Neil confided. "But he doesn't."

"Well... He wouldn't tell me the third thing that would fulfill Adam. In his opinion. So I didn't know if I could agree or not." Kris tapped his fingers impatiently on the bar counter. He probably shouldn't hold a grudge about that, it was so long ago and really, Brad had been decent to him. Aside from the bucket incident. "Which is one way to win -- withhold information."

"What were the first two? Let me guess...Performing, sex and... Oh!" Neil nodded. "I know. I'm positive I know. And I agree."

"And let me guess, you'll tell me if I help you."

"I think you're the type of guy who'll help me if you think it's the right thing to do for Adam, period."

"Okay, so convince me that whatever you want is in Adam's best interests. Or at least tell me that your point is..." Kris crossed his arms over his chest. 

"I...uh...really pissed Adam off."

"I know."

"He's not talking to me right now."

"I know."

"It upsets Mom that we're not talking."

"Also something I know. But what I don't know is what you want from me or why you think I'd give it to you."

"Okay, fine. Do you think Adam is ready to forgive me?" Neil asked quietly. "Because I'm ready to apologize. And do better. I'm not asking for my job back. I know it's yours now and you're doing a great job. Or so I hear. And... again. I apologize. I was a dick to you and well.... last thing I want to be is another Brian in people's lives, the guy people call a dickwad behind their back. Or knowing Adam, to their face. I want to do better."

"Do you?" Kris busied himself by reaching for a glass and polishing it as Neil kept talking. And talking. And still talking! For godssakes, would he ever stop talking? Well, that was one way the two brothers were alike -- They. Never. Shut. Up. But unlike when Adam carried on, he didn't have to pay attention to Neil. All he had to do was figure out if Neil's apology was a good thing. How would he feel if Daniel apologized? Truthfully, if one day Daniel showed up and apologized, he'd be thrilled. If Neil was sincere in his apology, Adam would be thrilled since he missed Neil. Odd as it seemed to Kris since he had stopped missing Daniel once realizing that they'd never had a real relationship since neither had known the truth about each other. But Adam and Neil did and therein lay the difference. Truth in a relationship was the key, but it was, he was realizing, somewhat foreign to him. Holding up his hand, Kris nodded. "Okay."

"Okay, I'll shut up."

"Yeah. Enough." Kris shook his head. "I'll... talk to Adam. See how he feels." Which was a no-brainer. Adam was generous with second chances. Not with thirds though.

"I was sort of hoping Adam was going to be hanging out here tonight. Get it over with," Neil admitted. "Plus I figured he'd be too polite to punch me in the nose in public."

"Well, there is a back room...." John offered.

Neil sighed. "Everyone's a comedian." 

"Adam is on his way back from London even as we speak," Kris told him. He smiled as he glanced over at his phone. He'd been gone too long. Kris had stayed home even though John had told him to go, but it seemed too... joined at the hip to him. Now he regretted it, because they could've been joined at the ass, his ass, or the mouth or... Oh wait, Neil was talking again. He'd forgotten how much Neil talked. 

"Maybe... Could I come over after you're done working? Before I lose my nerve? How long was he gone?" Neil asked. 

"Two weeks. He did a bunch of promos around Australia, New Zealand, Southeast Asia, then India, South Africa, then back up to Europe."

"Oh, well then, I'll wait. He's going to be totally exhausted. No point in pushing my luck."

 

Feeling as though he were swimming upward against a tide of black velvet, Adam opened his eyes, the darkness lightened to grey. He thrashed around as he felt the weight on top of him. Must--

"It's just me, sweetie..." Kris whispered as he wiggled into position on top of Adam's long body. "Sorry I woke you.'

"Sokay..." Adam mumbled, automatically wrapping his arms around Kris and smiling. It was Kris wiggling around on top of him just like every night, just like always, just the way he wanted. "Good...back home..." 

"Mmmm... I missed you ..." Kris whispered, his lips eagerly kissing Adam's smile, knowing that sexy freckle on his bottom lip was his for the taking. He licked slowly, smiling himself as Adam's lips parted and he sighed happily. Adam's lips were soft and tender and pliant, no doubt from sleepiness. Usually when Adam returned from a trip out of town he threw Kris down on the bed and took him fierce and fast until he screamed. Kris had a hankering for being manhandled like that, especially when they'd been separated. But tonight, Kris was finding a new fondness for Adam's willingness to let Kris take the lead. Adam must be super tired and oh god. Kris froze. Was he being a pig? "Do you want me to stop?"

"Do you want me to commit you to an insane asylum?" Adam took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of Kris that he had always thought of as warm chocolate, and relaxed into the bed, feeling Kris settle more fully on top of him, lightly rubbing his hardening cock against Adam's hip. "I'm tired, not dead. And you're apparently wide awake. I'm sure we can work something out." He lifted his mouth and smiled again as Kris kissed him, slowly and thoroughly, spreading his hands over Adam's chest and gently stroking the skin. As he moved his own hands down Kris' back, Adam wondered if Kris would take the plunge and make love to him without spending days working up to it the way he always did; but then again, maybe he'd been working up to it in his own mind while they were separated or... who cared? He was too tired and Kris' hands and mouth were both sweet. For once, he wasn't going to overthink. "Missed you, love you..." 

"Adam... can we...?" Kris prompted as Adam murmured softly but said nothing in response to his question.

"Sorry, I'm out of it..." Adam muttered, his eyes closing as Kris' mouth moved down his neck.

"Can we...." Kris kissed his way down Adam's chest, smoothing his hands over Adam's hips, then under his ass and gently kneading it. Damn, still the best ass ever. And it was his. This gorgeous man was his. He still couldn't believe it. There were times when Adam was gone that he'd wake up in the night, afraid it had all been a dream, then he'd turn over and rub his face into Adam's pillow, scenting him and only then fall back asleep. Rubbing his cheek against Adam's chest, Kris ghosted kisses over the soft hair, before kissing his way up Adam's neck to nibble on his lower lip. "I missed you so much. I need... Can I... have you?"

Oh, a twist. That was good, Adam thought hazily as he murmured, "You can have whatever you want, but don't expect much from me. I'm in three different time zones at once right now." 

"Just lie there and think of England." Kris grinned as he lifted onto his elbows and looked down at Adam in the faint light filtering in from the bathroom nightlight. He looked... sleepy and sexy and vulnerable. This was gonna be different. It was a rare enough occasion that he topped and rarer still that Adam didn't somehow manage to top from the bottom, which was fine with him, but it was his turn, surely, to be in charge. 

"England was cold and damp and did I mention cold?" Adam shivered, then shuddered as Kris' wet mouth covered his nipple and sucked hard. "I didn't think I was ever gonna get warm... Although that helps..." he moaned again as Kris' hand slid down over his hip, between his legs and cupped his balls. What was Kris doing.... Ohhh. He was pressing his finger into Adam. He shifted his legs and lifted upward. The last time Kris had been inside him had been on tour, that night Kris decided he might want to learn how to play electric lead guitar. Adam chuckled sleepily. 

"Mmm, haven't done this since that night on tour..." Kris remembered, still wondering who had taken who that night. "That was so hot...." 

"I want to, Kris, but seriously, I'm so out of it..." Adam ran his hands up and down Kris' back, then gently cupped the back of his neck, urging him back up for a kiss.

'Let me...." Kris said against Adam's lips. "It's my turn to take care of you for a change... I want to, okay?"

Sighing slowly, Adam nodded. If he had felt like he was swimming in warm velvet before, it was nothing compared to the slow flowing heat that filled him as Kris touched and kissed him, then gently filled his body, rocking slowly until they both sighed and whispered in their fulfillment, rather than shouting. Soft and sweet.... Perfect, Adam thought, before he began drifting off as Kris left to get a wash cloth. 

Climbing back into bed after tossing the washcloth into the bathroom sink and shutting off the light, Kris took a deep breath as he looked down at Adam, who was lying on his side, one arm spread before him, waiting for Kris to slide in. This was good night. The bed smelled like Adam and sex. The best scent in the entire world, as far as he was concerned. He ran his hand slowly from Adam's shoulder, over his chest and down to his hip. "I love you, sweetie." 

"That was..." Adam sighed, trying to think of a word, but his brain was simply not open for business. He was so tired and now in the haze of an orgasm and a surfeit of touch, he was really just floating. 

"I swear! If you say that was nice, I'll... I'll...." Kris curled his hand around Adam's thigh. "I'll bite your balls!" When Adam didn't respond, Kris looked up and smiled as he realized Adam had fallen asleep. Feeling a wave of tenderness roll over him, he wrapped his arm around Adam's hips and cuddled into his side, wiggling closer until Adam put his arm around Kris in his sleep. Gently kissing Adam's chest, Kris whispered, "Actually... I wouldn't. I'll never hurt you. Promise. I love taking care of you too." 

 

"Kris, why are you carrying around a bowl of mashed potatoes?" Ryan Seacrest asked, smiling automatically as he took a drink from a waiter, who undoubtedly believed they were really a singer or a dancer or an actor.

"It's ammunition." Kris nodded emphatically. Yeah, this little party was full of label types and pr people since it was a wrap party for Adam's latest tour dvd and Hannah had told him to schmooze, but not only was he not a schmoozer, he had a job to do and he was going to do it well. And that job was making Adam happy. 

"Aren't you worried about people eating your ammunition?"

"Nope. This is LA. People are way more worried about their carb intake and mainting the smallest possible body fat ratio thingee than enjoying their food. That's why there's so much alcohol and drug abuse. People are stuffing their cobs with crap to get the high they'd get from a good biscuit."

"A good biscuit?"

"C'mon. You're from Georgia. I bet you know from good biscuits and gravy." 

"Ooookaaaaaay..." Ryan nodded and bit his lip to keep from laughing at Kris' typically southern fixation on food as a panacea for emotional ills. "Maybe you should carry that bowl when you and Adam go out and encounter the paps," Ryan suggested as Adam left a striking older woman to walk toward Kris with a frown on his face. Following his gaze, he saw to his surprise that Adam's brother had walked into the backyard. Uh-oh. 

"Maybe you should carry it right now!" Kris blurted out, shoving the bowl into Ryan's stomach as he saw Neil look from side to side and then scoot over, with a look on his face that said, "Get this over with."

"Adam..." Neil began, then uncharacteristically wrung his hands.

"Neil." Adam looked down and frowned. Was Neil actually nervous? Nah, couldn't be. "What are you doing here?"

"Kris invited me."

"He did, did he?" Adam raised an eyebrow, crossed his arms and stared down at Kris. "Hence the mashed potatoes that Ryan is holding." 

"Nah." Ryan shook his head. "I love mashed potatoes."

"No, you don't. You avoid carbs like you avoid Dunkelman." Adam smirked.

"He scores," Lane interjected as she joined them. She paused, staring at Neil until he shifted uncomfortably, then turned to Kris. "Kris, Hannah says you should talk to the gentleman in the red jacket. He has a club and is looking to hire a semi-regular acoustic performer. You aren't avoiding him, are you?" she asked suspiciously.

"Speaking of avoiding..." Kris said softly. "Or not... Adam. How about you and Neil have a talk?"

Adam stared down at Kris. The guy who wouldn't even call his own brother to yell at him for being a dick had set it up so he'd have to talk to Neil? 

Feeling the intense, knowing stare Adam was directing at him, Kris shrugged. "Well. I thought that if my brother were willing to stop being a dick and apologize _and_ really truly intended to behave better, I'd give him a second chance, so....."

"So you're willing to stop being a dick, apologize and really truly intend to behave better?" Adam asked Neil. "Has a massive restructuring of the cosmos occurred? Briefly?"

"People can change. I know you believe that." I'm counting on that, Neil told himself.

"I think it's possible. Not necessarily probable."

Neil started to argue, then decided against it. Arguing wasn't a good way to prove his intention to behave better. Although the truth was, Adam used to have a much more positive outlook on people. It was, well, sad actually, that life had taught him more caution. Perhaps that meant that he should argue because hell, he agreed with Kris, Dani, Lane, and their mom -- cynicism did not suit Adam. "Hey, bro, I'm the cynical one here. Not you. We need to play our roles, don't we?" 

"You know I don't believe in playing roles as assigned." 

"Right. So why can't you believe I'd play something other than my role?" Neil retorted.

"Oh snap...." Ryan muttered under his breath.

"I know, right?" Kris whispered back. Lane stepped on Kris' foot. He was going to get them kicked out of the ring for the fight. 

" _Hellooooo_?" Adam and Neil said in unison.

"Privacy?" Neil added. 

"Oh. Oh!" Kris nodded. "I guess we should...go."

Ryan nodded. "Yeah. Before I start actually eating these potatoes."

"Oh, the horror!" Kris took the bowl. "I'm keeping this bowl. As insurance..." He held it up as he glared at Neil. "I've got the mashies and I'm prepared to use them." He narrowed his eyes at Neil and stomped off with Ryan and Lane as she complained about their big mouths. Pausing to look back at Neil, he pantomimed scooping, then throwing potatoes at him.

"You're right. He is cute." Neil smiled at Adam. "And, oddly, protective."

"There's nothing odd about protecting the people you love. It should be natural."

"Yeah.... well, also natural is sibling rivalry. That whole Cain and Abel story," Neil began, then stopped. "Which, well, we both went to Hebrew School long enough to know that didn't turn out so well. So I want to turn over a new leaf. Starting with -- I...uh... I'm sorry. I am, really truly, sorry. I was an ass. For a long time."

Staring intently into Neil's face while the silence stretched out, Adam pursed his lips. He finally asked, "Why did you come to the conclusion that your behavior was inappropriate and counter-productive?"

"To say nothing of hurtful?"

"That too. Why, when how? Because I doubt you suddenly had an epiphanic moment."

"No, I didn't eat those 'shrooms with you at Burning Man." Neil's lips quirked up as Adam rolled his eyes. "You can't fool your own brother. I didn't have sudden burst of clarity. You're right."

"Of course, I'm right."

"Of course..." Neil hissed in a long breath. "Okay, we can play that game another time. I know you see this party as a work event, so I'll hustle. I've been working at a comedy club and you know what about those comics?"

"Most of them are angry, bitter misanthropes who use their comedy as a weapon or a wall? To get revenge on those they feel hurt them or to hide due to their own insecurities?"

"Yeah!" Neil shook his head. "Sometimes..."

"I know. I'd hate me too for being right all the time." Adam grinned, then kicked his brother's shin. "Except you know I'm actually not. I've made more than my share of mistakes."

"I know. I revel in those moments," Neil teased, relieved when Adam kept smiling. "I also -- in hindsight -- reveled in our relationship. That is, I did when I wasn't being a dick. I... want to work on not being one of those angry, bitter misanthropes who use words as a weapon or a wall. I've been working on it and I... hope you can help me too."

"Oh wait. So does that mean I get to call you on your crap and you think it's a good thing?" Adam asked eagerly.

"Yeah, that's what it means. Consider it a belated birthday present. I'm just a few weeks late." Neil held out his hand, then closed his eyes and sighed in relief when Adam pulled him close for a hug. "Love you, bro..." he said softly.

"Love you, too." Adam responded.

Opening his eyes, Neil smiled as he saw Dani looking at the two of them and looking pleased herself. "And if you need anything else, like say, someone to rip that Brian a new one..."

"Nah. They've broken up hopefully for good, so..." 

 

"That's not necessary." Kris shook his head and plunked the bowl of mashed potatoes down on the kitchen island.

"What's not necessary?" Adam asked as he came up behind Geoffrey and Kris, looking for the caterer to tell them to refill the shrimp station. 

"Geoffrey here was giving me... career advice," Kris said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"And that's a horrible, awful, no good, very bad thing indeed," Adam said drily. "One of the best managers in the business giving you business advice. You should sell the story of your trauma to E! News. I'm sure Ryan would do a segment on it in a heartbeat."

Geoffrey burst out laughing. "Why is it I have more fun in the kitchen with Adam than when I pay good money to see a show?" 

"Because he's a snot, but a very funny snot? Which is another word for bitch?" Kris laughed when Adam preened at his words. 

Geoffrey pointed at Kris. "And he's right too. This time, anyway." 

Kris elbowed Geoffrey. "Hey, someone needs to be on my side!"

"Even Lane would tell you to listen to Geoffrey," Adam reminded Kris. 

"Hey, Kris, did you talk to that club owner?" Lane asked.

"My god!" Kris jumped. "Do you always have to sneak up?"

"That's the best way to learn intel..." Lane grinned. "I know everything."

"No, you don't." Geoffrey shook his head. "Unless you know why my ex-wife is here." Seeing the smirk on Lane's face, the guilt on Kris' and the innocence on Adam's, Geoffrey choked on his drink. "Adammmm.... What plan do you have?"

"Who me? Making plans?" Adam scoffed, then grabbed Geoffrey's arm. He whistled a few bars of a song and hauled Geoffrey away. 

"Matchmaker from Fiddler on the Roof?" Lane giggled. "Perfect."

"You have no idea..." Kris agreed. He shook his head, then smiled. "Adam and his plans."

 

"If you could do anything, what would you do?" Adam inquired, as he turned off the sound board and stretched, reaching toward the ceiling with his hands.

"Anything?" Kris sighed as he scratched his bare chest and complained silently to himself that Adam was fully dressed. "Right now? If I could find the remote, I'd be watching basketball." And turning on sports would be a good way to get Adam to leave the room, because he could always find something better to do than watch sports. Kris looked over and frowned. What was he thinking? Adam wasn't going anywhere. He had that damn immovable look on his face. Kris flung himself down in his mushroom chair and threw his arm over his head. "Oh, just go ahead. Interrogate me. Do your worst!"

"That was remarkably melodramatic for you." Sitting down in front of the chair, Adam put his hands on Kris' knees and pushed his legs apart. "Have you been spending time with Brad?"

"Don't distract me so you can then land a zinger. Just ask." Kris froze, then melted as Adam stroked his hands up Kris' jean-clad thighs. Oh hell, Adam was going to confuse him, then dive in for the kill. 

"I already did. Since you're apparently suffering long-term memory loss--"

"If I am, it's because you made me listen to that same line in that new song for the last hour!" Kris pointed at Adam. "Over-thinking again!"

"Perfection _is_ possible." Ignoring the complaint, Adam repeated himself. "If you could do anything, what would you do? Do you want to do your music? Would you rather be a teacher? A bartender? An actor? A...crane operator?" 

"I want to do my music." 

"What do you mean by, 'Do?' Record, perform, write, teach or some combination thereof? What do you enjoy most?"

"Have you ever given thought to being a lawyer?"

"Have you ever given thought to answering my questions?"

"Have you ever given thought to the notion that I just don't whip out answers to hard questions in an instant?"

"You want to whip out something hard in an instant?" Adam grinned. "Well, let me get to work..." He reached out and unzipped Kris' jeans, then stopped. "No, wait. I'm not going to get distracted."

"No such luck." 

"What do you need to do to achieve those goals?"

"Good god, are you my career counselor now?" Kris teased, even as he sat up with a sudden burst of renewed energy. The fact that Adam was initiating a pointed conversation about Kris' music career was a huge step. Adam had always been encouraging, but he'd never pushed before. Maybe he was fully over his paranoia about being used. Maybe that mean Kris could... But still. Kris didn't want to do anything to resurrect that anxiety in Adam. He bit his lip in indecision. 

"If you want to get back into performing, it's easier if you have nights free," Adam suggested.

"I know. But what would I do during the daytime? I'll be honest, I'd way rather be a bartender than work at McDonald's again. Ugh. And I don't want to do what Tommy did and work in some cubicle in a call center."

"I don't suppose you want to replicate my old job at the make up counter either."

"It would probably help if I knew anything about make up at all." Kris shrugged. Although he'd watched Sutan make up Adam over fifty times last year on tour, he'd been way more focused on the blow job he'd made into a post-make up tradition. A man had to be able to set priorities and Adam's cock was a way bigger... heh heh bigger.... priority than make up. Even if it was glittery. Make up. Not the cock. Although day-umm, he did love it when they played with that edible glitter and he put the purple stuff on Adam's cock. 

"Eyes up?" Adam laughed delightedly because what guy wouldn't like it when his boyfriend was staring at his cock like it was Thanksgiving dinner. "Listen. Monte worked in a guitar shop and taught lessons. That's how he ended up meeting Madonna. You could do something like that at some point. Or how about a music teacher in school?"

"You know, Adam, I thought you took this morning off so you could relax and instead you're... Oh, what am I saying. Your brain never relaxes."

"Well, it does after we have sex."

"For about ten minutes. Max. Then you're coming up with some idea." Kris grinned. He loved Adam's energy and enthusiasm. He knew he could be too laid back, what his father had called too passive, and that Adam's pushiness was a good thing. Just as he balanced out Adam. 

"Speaking of which, I know you weren't really interested in that club owner Hannah brought to the party, but--" Adam closed his mouth and counted to ten, then to twenty. 

"You are just chomping at the bit to tell me what to do, aren't you?" Kris asked.

"Of course not..." Adam drawled. God, it was killing him. But he had made a promise to himself that he was not going to boss Kris around. Well, too much. Outside of sex, of course. 

Kris cracked up. "It's killing you, isn't it?"

"Don't be ridiculous." Adam frowned at himself. He really should take acting lessons again. He'd have to talk to Lane about finding him a class. 

"Really? Then why are you..." Kris reached out and put his hand over Adam's fidgeting fingers. "Why are you playing with the rings you're not really wearing?" 

Adam threw up his hands. "You got me. But I--" 

"I do got you," Kris teased, sliding off the chair to straddle Adam's hips. He wiggled around, laughing when Adam crossed his eyes and cupped his ass. "You need a reward for holding back on bossing me around about my music."

"I do?" Adam asked eagerly. He ran his hands up Kris' bare back and over his shoulders. They really had to take a vacation one of these days so that he could get Kris naked on a beach or in the ocean and have 24/7 access to that skin. And that ass. 

"Yeah. You can boss me around some other way." 

"Some other way?" Adam smiled. "Unspecified way? I get to choose?"

"I...uh..." 

"Be careful what deal you make..." Adam warned with a grin. "In music or --"

"Not in your arms. I'm always safe there...." Kris laughed as Adam tumbled him onto his back and finished unzipping his jeans. As Adam slid his hand inside and raised his eyebrow at Kris' nudity under his jeans, Kris grinned, then gasped when Adam pulled his finger out, licked it and slid it back inside, unerringly aiming for his pucker, then twisting inside. "Oh fuck! But not too safe. Perfect..."


	34. Leashes, collars and cuffs! Oh my!

**Chapter 34: Leashes, collars and cuffs! Oh my!  
Rating: PG-15**

"Hedgehog, we have a problem."

"Hedgehog?" Kris looked up from the video game to see Adam standing in the doorway with a frown on his face. "Uh-oh, what's wrong? Geoffrey..." He peered around Adam's body and saw Geoffrey and Jacob behind him. They had both shown up at their door at ass o'clock on a Sunday morning. He'd been shooed away while the two of them took Adam into the dining room. He should've known no good would come of this. He gulped, pushed his glasses back up his nose and swiped his forehead. "Wait. _Hedgehog_? I'm not mad about anything."

"But you will be. The gods know I'm fucking furious." Adam held out his hand. Kris was going to go ballistic and he had every right to do so. "Let's go talk to the gruesome twosome, then get ready to go swimming. We're both going to need to work off some steam." 

"What happened?" Kris asked nervously, rubbing his damp hands on his jeans before nervously taking Adam's hand and holding on tight. Oh hell, with the mix of anger and anxiety on Adam's face, he was probably going to sweat like a pig at a roast. 

"Brian," Adam spat. If only he could just flush the guy like the turd he was... "Fuckityfuckfuck!"

"What?" Kris looked up at Adam in surprise as they walked back toward the dining room. "But what..."

"He sold a story or he's trying to sell a story. Some guy at TMZ called Lane..." Adam paused to give Kris a chance to explode. He'd already done so, now it was Kris' turn. Any second, there--

"What the hell! He's trying to sell a story? What story? That he's a dickwad!?!" Kris yelped. 

"Well, that's not worth any money. Dickwards are a dime a dozen," Adam reminded Kris. "Which is why he's trying to sell a story and some photos about me and you're caught in the crossfire. TMZ gave us a warning..."

"The TMZ guys like you, right?" Kris asked, trying to piece it all together. He held back as Geoffrey sat down at the table, until Adam gave him a push and then pulled him toward a chair and sat down next to him.

"Yeah. I pose for them, so they like me because I give them good pictures." Adam clamped his hands on his knees as he clenched his jaw. 

"Quid pro quo." Kris nodded. "So they called Lane and..." He trailed off as Jacob sat down in front of his laptop and began clicking away, obviously looking for something.

"Brian's apparently trying to say he has photos of me taken obviously without my knowledge--"

"You're so paranoid, you never got naked in a house with anyone but me in it!" Kris exclaimed. "Anyway, you have a crew from the label sweep the house every month for bugs and shit, so he couldn't have planted a camera. I don't believe it." 

"You're not paranoid if someone's out to get you," Jacob said automatically. Damn, he couldn't believe Adam had actually taken his recommendation to have regular security sweeps after that long-ago party when a friend of a friend had planted a bug, but thank god. "TMZ didn't believe the photos either, but since it's illegal to sell such photos, they had a legal incentive to contact us in addition to wanting to keep Adam posing for their paps."

"Yeah, so I don't think he has any pictures and frankly, after the last set? Who cares? I couldn't look worse. The bigger issue is that the dickwad is trying to sell a story that you and I are..." Adam rolled his eyes. "Quote unquote scary sex freaks. The kind that the middle Americans --who filed complaints against me for the AMAs with the FCC-- will find repulsive and repellent and no doubt will be inspired to protest at my tour stops." People like Kris' family. How could he protect Kris from all this? Adam thought furiously. Anyone who knew Kris would know he wasn't a bad person, but then again the people who had spent Kris' whole life knowing him had kicked him out like rotting trash. 

"But those people aren't your fans anyway. Plus you've had protesters before. The kind of folks I grew up with. No big deal. Who cares?" Kris pressed, confused about why Adam cared about people like that. 

"It's the specific content of his gossip. It's not just that we're gay, but that we're the type of gays who should come with a warning label to protect children from us," Adam explained, forcing his voice to be gentle while he waited for Kris to realize the implications. 

"Me? Us?" Kris began to laugh, then froze as his breakfast turned to a lump in his stomach. "Oh god, the kind of scary stuff that Conway thinks is the norm for gay people, right? My mother, my father, my brother... Oh fuckityfuckfuckfuck is right!"

"Exactly," Geoffrey answered, looking closely at Adam, After his initial burst of anger at the news, his first worry had been about Kris' family. Sometimes Geoffrey thought Adam had more hope of a reconciliation than Kris did... possibly because Kris knew his family better than Adam. "Our guess is that he knows enough about your history and background, Kris, to believe you wouldn't want your family and friends back there to believe that about you. Therefore, he no doubt believes Adam or the label will pay him off. The call to TMZ was the first salvo to show he's serious. We'll probably receive a call from him. Or Adam -- you will, would be my guess."

"You're not going to pay him off, are you?" Kris turned to Adam. Adam wouldn't on his own behalf, but knowing Kris' fears and family -- damn it, so intertwined... would he? "No, don't--" 

"It's an option," Adam began, curling his hand into a fist, fighting to keep his anger in check so he could focus on solving the problem and dealing with Kris' reaction. 

"No way! Doesn't a blackmailer always come back?"

Geoffrey interjected, "Usually, that's why it's only one option. Let's go over them."

Jacob held up his finger. "First. Is there anything, anything at all this bottom feeder might know about you two that we need to prepare for? How loose are Dani's lips?"

"I'll call Dani and make sure, but she's always been quite careful about what she says about me to anyone," Adam told him, uncurling his hand from a fist to hold onto Kris' hand reassuringly. Kris was staring googly-eyed at Geoffrey, then Jacob, then back to Geoffrey as if he was about to lose his breakfast. Damn it, Kris shouldn't have to deal with this shit. He ground his teeth together in frustrated anger. 

"But what about anything he might have seen or heard first hand?" Jacob pressed. "Be _honest_ , guys. About everything, not just sex. Although sex sells best, there are spicy anecdotes or hints he might add to make it even more salacious. I need honesty right now so I can be prepared. So tell me -- did you do serious drugs or have multi-partner sexual relations in front of him?"

"Did we ever have an orgy or do cocaine, heroin or meth in front of him? Nope." Adam shook his head. 

"No devil worship either. Geez! What kind of guy do you think I am?" Kris protested. "And no snakes! I'm way more boring than... than Pearline!" 

"I would never say you're boring, Hedgehog, but we're both probably... different to a slice of America. DIfferent is scary to a lot of people." Adam sighed. "At least neither of us is bigoted, so we couldn't have said anything offensive in that way." 

"But he could take something... and... _twist_.. it," Kris said abruptly, the words halting and loud, as if they were chunks of broken concrete falling off of a building. "Look how the gossips back home twisted my story. Twist something innocent or not so innocent -- I mean, we are adults. With a sex life. And... well, we all of us joke about sex and stuff. And we both can have a pretty raunchy sense of humor at times. And then there's Brad and Tommy..."

"Fuck! You're right!" Adam growled and slapped his hand on the table. "The way Tommy jokes about thanking you for having sex with me. Dickwad could spin it into a three way or fourway." Adam nodded. "I suppose he could take a joke about me spanking Kris or tying him up and run with it--"

"Have you done either of those things?" Jacob asked.

"I beg your pardon?" Adam snapped. He felt blood rush to his face as his anger surged once again. "Whatever we do in private is just that: private. Between two consenting adults. No one is hurt or coerced in any way in our relationship."

"I'm just saying, it's an easier defense--" Jacob broke off as Geoffrey kicked him under the table. Oh crap. Adam was pissed and he was going to dig his heels in.

"An easier defense!" Adam exclaimed. "That's bullshit. I'm not running for the president of some League of Traditional Morals. I'm an entertainer. My sex life is no one's business but mine and my partner's and if I hang him from the ceiling in a sling while covering him with glitter--"

"Edible glitter!" Kris interjected.

Geoffrey bit back a groan. Jacob had poked the sleeping tiger that was Adam and now Kris was chiming in? Bloody hell. Adam was going to start a rant with polysyllabic words any second now. 

"We don't need to defend our sex lives! I'm not going to present myself as some... safe gay boy who does safe vanilla sex all the time just to make people who are overtly or unconsciously homophobic comfortable. My whole philosophy has been about accepting differences, not sweeping them under the carpet."

"Okay, whatever, I'm not arguing with your right to privacy, just trying to figure out the best way to handle this. I'm on your side, remember?" Jacob shrugged. "So I need to know. Did you ever say anything in front of Brian, something he could recount as a witness, about spanking or bondage? And how was it received by people around you?"

"I get it. If everyone thought it was a joke..." Adam nodded. "The people we told would know it's a joke, but if you take it out of context, it could be made to appear that our closet contains whips, collars, and leashes. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but--"

"Bloody hell." Geoffrey pinched the bridge of his nose. "And there's all that footage of Adam playing with the whips fans threw to him on the Idols tour the year he won. That could quite easily play into his hands, permit people to believe your closet is some dungeon of doom." 

"Ha. Like there's any room what with all of his boots and jackets!" Kris shook his head. 

Jacob nodded and made a note. The way Kris and Adam teased and talked was actually their best defense. Their relationship was obviously real, as well as charming and even sweet sometimes. He shuddered. Sweet. Ugh. However, it could be used. He looked up and asked, "So I take it that you're not really into the BDSM lifestyle he was trying to sell to TMZ--"

"BDM?" Kris squeaked.

"You squeaked." Adam smiled slightly.

"What's BDM? Some sort of weird bowel movement sex? What does the D stand for? Dump? That's disgusting!"

"Bowel movement...." Adam burst out laughing. "No, no. BD _S_ M. _S_."

"Stinky bowel movement sex?"

Lightly banging his forehead on the table, Adam laughed over and over. "No, no..." 

Geoffrey smiled. Indeed, Kris was going to be part of their defense. Earn his keep. Geoffrey decided he was going to have a private conversation with the boy, as he explained, "BDSM means bondage-domination-submission-masochism."

"I thought it meant bondage-domination-sadism-masochism." Adam shrugged as he twisted his rings on his fingers and fought the urge to punch something. Damn it, Kris should not have to deal with this shit.

"I thought it meant your AMA show," Geoffrey said dryly. "And I'm not just talking about the costuming."

"Very funny. Very. Funny." Adam glared at Geoffrey.

Geoffrey smiled, then seeing that Adam's amusement had been short-lived and he was back on point, stubborn point that is, continued. "But... he could spin that show the way some of the crazy critics did -- that it was a showcase into your lifestyle and spin some story about you using the leashes on Kris at home or some club--"

"You've never gone into one of those clubs with or without Kris, have you? No collars for Kris with your name on the front or--" Jacob asked quickly. 

Lane spoke up from the doorway. "No. I've never ordered anything like that for Adam on my Amazon account or any other."

"That sell stuff like that on Amazon?" Jacob asked. "You must have some interesting recommendations on your account." 

"They sell everything on Amazon." Lane flung her bag on the table and waited. When Adam said nothing, she sat down with a hard thud. This meeting must not be going well if Adam wasn't going to yell at her for abusing the leather. 

Adam closed his eyes. He had warned Kris of the potential trash talk that could happen about him. He had warned himself over and over about trusting people. And now his fears were coming true. 

"Wait. Leashes and collars? Clubs with leashes and collars?" Kris shook his head. "You mean, like on the AMAs? But that was just a show."

"C'mon, Kris." Jacob tapped his fingers on the table impatiently. "You've been in LA how long? And I know Adam's friends aren't exactly homeschooling fundamentalists with repressed sexuality. I know you must have heard jokes. There's always a basis in truth in jokes."

"But the leashes and collars? Not for real. I thought it was an urban legend. You know, like the mouse that was deep fried at Kentucky Fried Chicken." 

"It always comes back to food..." Geoffrey said under his breath. Poor Kris. Being hungry was probably something a person never truly got over. 

Jacob stared at Kris, who was agog, but leaning on Adam and rubbing his back. He stared at Adam who was smoothing the collar of Kris' ugly plaid shirt. "The best strategy is the truth."

"What does that mean?" Adam snapped back to attending to Jacob. "I'm not going to defend our sex lives. Period." 

"It's simple." Jacob pointed from Adam to Kris. "You two are going to an event and do interviews as a pre-emptive strike. And demonstrate how repellently cute you are as a couple. Get that idea fresh in people's minds. How Kris is just a country boy come to the big city and is still all agog at the bright lights. How Adam is a sweet dork under all the glitter. And how you are the Cutest. Couple. Ever!" Jacob fluttered his hands around his face.

"Did you seriously just make jazz hands?" Adam tilted his head. 

"I think he did." Kris tilted his head the other way.

Adam frowned. He wasn't interested in jazz hands or conformity. "Did you seriously call us the cutest couple ever?"

 

"I think I'm gonna hurl." Kris licked dry lips.

"Please don't. These boots cost the earth." Adam took a step back. Lane sighed and handed Kris a water bottle.

Kris uncapped the water and took a long drink while reminding himself that he had a job to do tonight. Geoffrey had read him his job description and it did not include hurling on Adam's footwear. Looking down, he noted, "I can't believe you spent nearly two thousand dollars on boots."

"It evens out. The last pair of shoes you bought were from Payless."

"I like those shoes."

"Well, actually they are better than those... slipper shoe things you had on the other day."

"They donate half of the proceeds to charity."

"I'll donate the _entire_ price to the charity if you'll stop wearing them. In fact, I'll double the donation if you throw them out or give them to Goodwill, although why poor people should have to wear ugly shoes, I don't know. Hmmm."

"I like them. They're comfy."

"Ugh. They look like they come from Pier One. Clearance rack. From last season." 

"Oooh, call the Fashion Police!" Kris said mockingly. Adam and his fixation on fashion... well, it was better arguing about that than thinking about this stupid damn interview he had to do and do right. 

"You rang?" Giuliana Rancic from the E! network motioned them over to her platform on the red carpet. 

"Guiliana!" Adam turned and swept Giuliana up in a hug. "Great to see you."

"You too. But I'm confused, You're actually early on a red carpet?" Giuliana whispered to Adam, then heard his pr rep clear his throat. She turned with Adam to confer with Jacob, discussing what they each wanted to gain from the interview. 

"I feel like I'm in Oz..." Kris muttered to Lane. "What the hell is Nicki Minaj wearing?" She was Adam's co-presenter for the soundtrack song of the year.

"It's a spoof on that egg thing Gaga did. I think." Lane pursed her lips together. "She probably thinks she's doing one better since this is the Oscars and Gaga's egg was at the Grammys." 

"Ah. That's why she's got a cardboard egg carton on her head."

"It's Dolce and Gabbana," Lane told him, reading Giuliana's assistant's notes over her shoulder. 

"It's dumb and gross expensive."

"That too," Lane agreed. "It's a costume, not couture," she began, then stepped back when Giuliana's producer signaled that the cameraman was ready to start filming. Giuliana nodded and Adam smiled. 

Kris swallowed and began fidgeting. Thank god this wasn't live. Anything stupid he said could be edited out. "I'm not sure about this jacket," Kris said, tugging on the sleeves. "It's awfully tight." 

"It fits you perfectly." Adam sighed. "You look gorgeous." 

"You're the gorgeous one. But the jacket -- is it really me?" 

"Of course it is. I told you it's you." Smiling down at Kris, Adam noted with relief that Kris no longer looked like Vesuvius of vomit was imminent. 

"Well, thanks for telling me what's me." Kris smiled back at Adam, then elbowed him.

"No problem." Adam grinned and tugged on the cuff of Kris' jacket to make it hit the correct spot on his shirt cuff.

"Are you two boys having one of your fake spit-spats?" Giuliana asked. Thank god, Adam Lambert was here early and was willing to allow his cute relationship with Kris to actually be shown on television for once. They were going to get great soundbytes. 

"Fake?" Adam put his hand over his heart in mock shock. "We're talking about clothes and Kris is questioning my judgment."

"Speaking of which..." Giuliana touched Kris' lapel. "Who made this? _Great_ jacket, Kris."

"Ha!" Adam crowed in triumph, then gave the designer's name when Kris looked at him helplessly.

"You really shouldn't have said that, Gee." Kris groaned. He was going to ignore the camera. Ignore. The. Camera. "Wait -- did he pay you to say that?" 

"Let me guess -- he picked it out for you?" Giuliana asked with a smile. "But hey, if I were married to Adam Lambert, I'd let him pick out my clothes."

Adam nodded. "And I bet your husband would like it if you wore clothes that actually fit your body as opposed to loose fitting slouchy pieces of fabric --usually in plaid -- that don't show off the goods."

"The goods? In plaid?" Giuliana began to laugh, trying to ignore the fit of giggles Lane was having and the nearly apoplectic fit his promo person was having. Adam had strayed off script. Shocking. Not. "You know, that sounds like a good idea for a segment on E! News or my reality show with my husband."

"I'd be up for it." Adam paused, then winked. "I'm usually...up for it. Wouldn't you agree, Kris?"

"I have the bow legs to prove it..." Kris blurted out. Elbowing Adam and seeing him crack up, he grinned in return. He turned, saw the red light on the camera, the amused grin on the cameraman, then felt his face turn bright red. Then he looked at Jacob and realized that his face was albino in comparison to Jacob's. Poor guy might stroke out before Adam finished giving interviews tonight. "Uh... that was a joke you might want to edit out, right? Right?"

"Oh I doubt it!" Giuliana grinned. This Kris was the guy she'd met at various industry parties, but who disappeared the minute a camera came out. "Have you two ever considered doing a reality show of your own?"

"Current evidence to the contrary, Kris doesn't like being in the spotlight," Adam said quickly. He was shocked that Kris had agreed to participate in interviews, albeit with people he knew personally like Giuliana. And then to make jokes and not only jokes, but his own normal, sex-oriented jokes? They had talked over and over about how to handle the problem and both had agreed that they weren't going to pretend to be something they weren't, but even still he was surprised Kris was being this loose. Maybe Kris should've been an actor or... He looked at Lane, wondering if she had given him water in his water bottle or something else... 

"Totally true," Kris said quickly, wishing he could just vanish now. He looked over at Jacob and Lane and sighed as both shook their heads at him. 

"But aren't you a musician too?" Giuliana asked, eager to get the usually camera-silent Kris to talk. 

"I found I'm happier behind the scenes and..." Kris shrugged. "That allows me to travel with Adam. From watching and paying attention, seems like a lot of entertainment relationships end because they're not together enough. At the Grammys just a few weeks ago, Faith Hill was telling me how she and Tim have a rule against spending more than 3 days apart and that seemed like a good idea to me. And they've kept to that rule even after having kids. Right now, I'd rather spend time with Adam and we'll figure something out after we have kids--" 

"Huhwha--" Adam choked.

Giuliana laughed. "Are you more astonished that Kris actually spoke to a reporter for that long--"

"It was a freaking monologue!" Adam said with wide eyes.

"Or that he brought up kids?" Giuliana chuckled as she saw the shock on Kris' face. He had apparently surprised even himself.

"News to me! Holy crap!" 

"Why would that be news?" Kris pressed. "You're the love of my life--" Kris paused when Giuliana went, "Awwww."

"Well, you're mine too, but..." Adam touched Kris' cheek and smiled down at him, seeing the nervousness deep in those brown eyes. "Right now? It's news to me, because, oh I don't know, we've never had that conversation."

"Oh yes, we have. I've talked about kids--"

"But not in the, ' _When we have them in the near future'_ kind of way! And not on the Oscars red carpet!"

"What's going on?" Geoffrey asked in a low tone to Lane as he caught up with them. For once Adam had been early and of course, that bloody LA traffic had made him late. He couldn't believe he hadn't made it here before the interview began but it looked like both boys were doing their jobs. 

Lane whispered back, "Adam's freaking out because Kris brought up the subject of kids. That alone should be good for about fifteen to twenty seconds on E! News now and probably on a later occasion, perhaps a segment on celebrity baby plans or their True/False segment. Quite a bit of mileage our boys are making already. Between that and the fashion discussion -- good for Fashion Police or an extended bit on eonline, plus the sex joke--"

"Sex joke?" Geoffrey echoed. He should've known. Adam was pissed. 

"I'm going to fucking kill them both!" Jacob muttered. "Adam made a sex joke and Kris actually made it worse!"

"Oh really?" Geoffrey nodded at Kris in satisfaction. Kris did want kids some day and despite Adam's philosophy that he didn't have to defend his differences, occasionally providing reasons for people to relate to you was a damn good strategy. And if they'd gotten in one sex joke, then hopefully Adam wouldn't feel the need to prove anything else with anyone else. 

"Kris, just one last question." Giuliana nodded as her assistant looked at her watch. "Just now when you were freaking Adam out by talking about kids, you were playing with an accessory hanging from his belt. What is it?"

"Oh this little old thing?" Adam grinned and pushed back his jacket. "You know me, Giuliana, I like to recycle my clothing. I wore this on the finale of Idol." He flicked it forward. "Kris is partial to it."

Kris burst out laughing, then choked. Then seeing the horror on Jacob's face, he choked again and buried his face in Adam's shoulder. He was done. 

Giuliana raised her eyebrows and laughed. "A jeweled set of... handcuffs. Of course. No doubt all the best dressed men will be wearing this accessory to the Oscars next year."

"Only if they want to be fierce. And fearless." Adam looked into the camera. "The best accessory isn't something you wear. It's the confidence to be who you are inside on the outside." 

Kris nodded. "What he said."


	35. On the carpet, off the script, on the table

**Chapter 35: On the carpet, off the script, on the table  
Rating: R **

"I don't wanna...." Kris whined.

"I don't care. Move. It." Lane put her hand on the small of Kris' back and pushed. Sometimes Kris needed a good push. 

"I tried to hire Lane away from you," Nancy O'Dell of Entertainment Tonight confided to Adam as she waited for the camerawoman to reset. "Stupid of me. She's Kris' best friend and the two of you -- you and Lane are family." 

"Yeah, she's the bossy older sister I never had. You know what that's like." 

Nancy agreed with a laugh as she watched Kris stop and look back at Lane, then wince dramatically as she pointed toward Adam with an implacable look on her face. Kris pouted, but then bounded forward with a grin on his face and a wink for Adam. Adam's reclusive boyfriend was actually going to do interviews? Well, that was fascinating. She nodded at Kris, then began the interview. "Adam, you look amazing in your non-traditional tux. I love the little sculls in the pattern on your shirt."

"Thank you. I love your gown too, Nancy. That delphinium color truly does set off your skin tone and eyes. I'd bet money it's Marchesa." 

"Good call, as always. I hope next year you'll join me again on the red carpet. If you can fit it into your schedule. I understand you've been incredibly busy since your wildly successful tour ended last year," Nancy prompted. 

"I love making music and entertaining people. Love it. It's what I was born to do and every minute I'm doing it -- no matter if there are frustrations..."

"Because you're a perfectionist," Kris interjected when Adam paused. There. He could take a cue. He glanced over at Jacob, who seemed pleased with the straightforward promo interview Adam and Nancy were doing. So far. So far. 

"Guilty." Adam shrugged. Yeah, he was going to be guilty of not following Jacob's plan to the letter tonight, but damn it. He was not going to play the role of the safe gay boy just to make people comfortable with their own fear of differences. "But I also want to provide the best art possible for my fans. They deserve it. They've supported me not only through sales, but with encouragement and enthusiasm for years now and I am not going to disrespect them by giving anything less than my best." 

'I think everyone in the industry knows about your fan base. And count me in too! I saw the show in LA. I admit it, I'm a Glambert!"

"Oooh, thanks, Nancy. You've always been so kind to me."

"It's easy to be kind when someone is a pleasure to work with. Speaking of which, what will your best be for them in the near future?" Pushing the microphone back towards Adam, Nancy glanced toward the cue card with the talking points Jacob had suggested. And wondered how long it would take Adam to veer off the list. Really, she and her crew should have set up a betting pool. 

"I hope to have an EP released in ten weeks and I have a tour planned for this summer in support of it. And in support of my own energy -- there is nothing like my fans in a crowd to feel invigorated. The energy and support they gave during a live show is a gift to a performing artist. I love nothing more than being on a stage, a platform if you will, and giving people what they want. Whether it's planned or improvised."

Seeing the glint of amused impatience in Adam's eyes, Nancy smiled genuinely. Well, she knew how to take a hint. "Wow, you've had an ambitious schedule this year already. You filmed a short recurring guest role on a television show, released a live tour dvd, and now you're in the process of planning an EP and a tour? Don't you worry about burn out? Or are you in a rush to accomplish so much because you're planning time off for a special event?"

"A special event?" Adam opened his eyes wide and ignored Kris' teeny tiny little gasp of dismay. Oh hell yeah, they were going off script. He loved Nancy. 

"I hear congratulations may be in order soon?"

"Oh fucking nooooooooooo...." Jacob moaned. "They're going off script. Adam is dangerous off script..." 

"Adam is funny off script," Lane disagreed. "He knows what he's doing." 

"I beg your pardon?" Adam asked, stalling as he debated about which way to take this conversation. He should try and make Jacob happy. Make them... relatable. _Normal_ Whateverthefuck that was. And get payback on Kris. Win-win. "Gays can't get married in this state yet. So no wedding. Yet." 

Kris gaped. "Huhwah? Wedding?"

"And by the way, Kris -- I'll want a black diamond or diamonds plural, in my wedding band." Adam picked up Kris' left hand and tapped the ring finger. "Let me know your preferences. But don't tell me plaid."

"Plaid...ring?" Kris said slowly. They had talked about getting married some day, but not in the near future... Oh. Just like kids. That bitch. He shook his head to hide his grin. "Even I... no..." 

Nancy saw the gleam in Adam's eyes and knew this interview was going in the right direction -- into a million different possible segments on the nightly show. "So no wedding yet. But a baby? You're adopting, I hear?"

"You hear we're adopting?" Adam grinned. "The red carpet version of the telephone game in action."

Nancy looked from Adam to Kris then back. "So it's not true."

"Not just yet," Kris interjected, looking up into Adam's eyes. Was he mad or... Oooh boy, Adam was ready to rumble.

Adam grinned. His turn. "No. And perhaps we'll use a surrogate."

"Huhwah?" Kris stammered.

"Why not? You're handy with a turkey baster."

Kris gaped, then bent over with a burst of laughter. "Ohmigodohmigodohmigod..."

Slapping his hand on Kris' back, Adam looked at Nancy and with big eyes, said, "What I mean by that is merely that last Christmas Kris cooked an entire turkey dinner for our friends and family. It was his first time cooking a turkey and he was extremely focused on making sure the meat was moist."

"Oh god, make him stop...." Kris pleaded as he held his stomach.

Nancy shook her head and surrendered to her own fit of giggles. "I cannnnn't...."

"I'm going to fucking kill him...." Jacob gritted out. "Kill. Him."

"You two have gutter minds. I'm shocked." Adam put his hand over his heart. Time to redirect back to wholesome good boy territory. "Honestly, I was only referring to Kris' ability to stuff, baste, cook and carve a turkey. All very innocent -- after all, my mother was there." Eventually.

"His mom was there!" Kris exclaimed. "Really, his mom was there. She taught me how to cook a turkey. I made my sweet potato dish too. It was awesome!"

"With or without the mini marshmallows?" Nancy asked since Kris seemed inordinately excited about sweet potatoes and she figured ET could use the sound byte closer to the holidays.

"Both! Although I had to forgive Adam for not being as excited about them as I was."

"Baby, no one was as excited about those sweet potatoes as you were. I swear you were more excited about them than about your presents under the tree." 

Nancy smiled. "So Adam, I know you're Jewish and Kris is Christian. How will you handle the holidays?"

"We'll do both. More festivities equals more fun! Who doesn't want more fun?"

Kris nodded. "Yeah, what kid doesn't want more presents?"

"Agreed. And I can attest that the best things in life come in small packages." Adam smiled as he gave Kris a one-armed hug. 

 

"Word on the carpet is that you two have been having a good time teasing each other," Ryan began.

"Absolutely!" Adam smiled. "I had to promise to fly in Chik-Fil-A for Kris to convince him to join me for a few interviews, but it was worth it. Teasing and all."

"So you're not mad?" Kris asked.

"Of course not!" Adam smiled down at Kris. "There's a saying that the worst advice you can give to some people is to be themselves--"

"I need to have my mom embroider that on a pillow and give it to Cowell," Ryan quipped.

"Yeah." Adam rolled his eyes. "As I was saying... That's not true of Kris. The best advice to which he could listen is to be himself. Because that self -- is pretty amazing."

"I am?" Kris asked softly.

Ryan saw the looks the two men were giving each other and prayed to the spirit of Philo Farnsworth that the camera and mics were working properly. Apparently this was a MOMENT and he was filming it.   
Yippee! Good news for their ratings. 

"You are." Adam touched Kris' cheek. "Hey, look at it this way -- you restored my faith in love. I've come to realize that faith in love is absolutely essential to my happiness and without it, I was growing cynical and negative. You walked into my life and helped me find the light again. That's pretty amazing, isn't it?" 

"Well, then..." Kris touched Adam's hand, then held on tightly. "You're more than amazing, because you not only gave me love and happiness, you restored my faith in myself and my faith in people. I was moving down a real negative path and then you took me by storm in Starbucks and my life has never been the same since. I thank God every day for sending me to you. Every day." 

Lane snifffled.

Geoffrey patted Lane on the back while watching Adam and Kris with a smug smile. 

Jacob grinned and whispered, "Gold. We just made bank. Brian can go suck it." 

 

"Go easy on the drinks," Adam warned Kris. "You get a little handsy when you're drunk and this is a work event."

" _Handsy_?" Lane scoffed. "He practically rotates his ass on your--"

"Lane!" Kris gasped, then giggled. Uh-oh, maybe he had drunk a little more than he should. 

Adam gave a loud gasp. "Honestly, Laney, you shock me."

"Nothing shocks you," Lane retorted.

"Oh, I don't know," Adam disagreed with a twist to his mouth. "I was shocked that Brian turned out to be that big of a dickwad." Looking from Lane's sympathetic gaze to Kris' hand patting him on the arm, Adam forcibly turned his thoughts away from the negative side. "On the silver lining side, however, I was happily surprised at how well you did in front of the camera when you wanted to, hedgehog. I was starting to wonder if Lane had given you vodka instead of water in that bottle. Or maybe you're more of an actor than you think."

"Nah." Kris shook his head. "I gave myself a pep talk. Geoffrey told me to pretend the cameras weren't there and to focus on you and the interviewer. Plus it was just three interviews with people I _know_ and like. But I don't wanna ever do that again? 'Kay?"

"Hopefully it will never be necessary again. And again, I apologize..." Adam said softly.

"I don't think Jacob would survive the two of you in front of a camera again," Lane said with a grin. "Wait. Perhaps that means you _should_ do it again!" 

"Nope... I'm going back into obscurity," Kris said hopefully. "And I found a way to do that for these events. I was talking to Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner--" He stopped when Lane clamped a hand on his arm.

"Wait --how do you say it in Petticoat Junction? Wait a cotton pickin' minute!"

Adam laughed. "I love hearing you say that in a British accent."

"Don't start imitating me!" Lane warned. "Where is Jennifer Garner?"

Kris pointed and Lane took off like a shot, "She's gonna go interrogate her for spy secrets, isn't she? Well, Jen will be nice -- she's real down to earth. Normal. We talked about coming from a small town out here to bright lights big city and what that feels like." Kris paused, then shook his head. "I can't believe I had something in common with a star like that. But I do. You were right -- a lot of celebrities are normal people with big paychecks. Well, at least they were."

"I know, right?" Adam grinned. "They're both nice people, aren't they?" 

"He's actually taller than you." Kris poked Adam in the shoulder.

"And she is taller than you." Adam patted Kris on the head. 

"Ha. Ha. Ha." Kris rolled his eyes. "He told me that he usually goes into the event without hitting the red carpet. So you were right -- I don't have to do it in the future if I don't want to." 

"Humph. You believed him and not me?"

"Well, he is taller. And Oscar-nominated. Actually he won the Oscar for writing, didn't he?" Kris grinned. "And actually, given how you go off script, I thought you were just breaking the rules for me, but Ben told me -- I still cannot freaking believe that I had a whole conversation with Sydney Bristow and Oscar-winner Ben Affleck!"

"Why? You're living with Grammy-nominated Adam Lambert."

Kris froze. "Oh. You're right. I guess... I guess I don't think of you that way. I just think of you as..." Kris smiled and touched the edge of Adam's eyebrow, careful not to smudge the eye makeup. "I think of you as just Adam. My Adam. A particularly beautiful man who is insanely talented and charismatic--"

"And immensely skilled in terms of sex."

"Oh, yeah, that too. Almost forgot..." Kris teased. "But... you're real to me. A guy. A guy I'm comfortable with, a guy I play video games with, a guy with a craving for ice cream, a guy who takes up too much of the bed.... And who looks just as amazing first thing in the morning as he does when he's all glammed up for the red carpet."

"Says the guy who can't see first thing in the morning without his glasses." Adam shook his head. Kris was sweet, but obviously love made him blind. Not that he was complaining. "By the way, let me tell you again how gorgeous you look tonight. Brad texted me that you looked good enough to eat and my mom texted me that we were a beautiful couple. And she agreed with me about the jacket." 

"She's gonna cut out pictures from the magazines for her scrapbook, isn't she?" Kris smiled, then looked down as one of his brief, but nonetheless still cutting moments of loss hit him. His own mama should be cutting out pictures too. But his father would probably use them for a dartboard. He tensed up and his hands curled into fists.

"She is," Adam agreed, lightly rubbing Kris' back, then sending his hand up Kris' spine to curl around the base of his neck. He brushed Kris' pulse with his thumb, feeling it begin to slow down as Kris relaxed. "Hey, just lean on me for a sec..." 

Kris leaned into Adam and took a deep breath, inhaling Adam's scent and feeling his warmth envelop him. "I'm good," he said and took another breath as he refocused the way Adam had taught him to do, to focus on the positive. "So... Ben Affleck told me that the side entrance -- that a lot of significant others do it that way if they don't want to be photographed."

"As I said. But truthfully, a lot of significant others know that part of their job is to not take any attention away their attention-whore spouse."

"Really?"

"Oh yeah." Adam nodded. 

"He's right," Lane agreed as she wedged herself back in between them. She had seen the distress on Kris' face, watched Adam quietly comfort him, and had hurried back over. Kris seemed okay now, but she was going to stick like a plaster to him while Adam went off to circulate again. "The stories I hear about some celebrities from their personal assistants are unbelievable." That was one reason why she was sticking with her boys. 

"But..." Kris studied Adam and thought. "You never seem to have any problem sharing the spotlight."

"That's because I'm secure. Why wouldn't I be? I'm both immensely talented and immensely hung."

Kris began to giggle. "Stop. I'm going pee my pants from laughing. My immensely tight pants."

"Yeah, it's a shame Lane picked up the wrong size." Adam rocked back on his heels with a grin.

"Don't blame me!" Lane pinched Adam's arm.

Adam brushed Lane's hand away. "Hey, don't crease the jacket!" 

"I guess I should go talk to the other PAs.." Lane looked around as innocently as she could, ignoring Adam's suspicious stare. "And... you know... ask for recommendations for nannies." 

"Laaane..." Adam lightly pinched her arm. "Don't even start."

"Speaking of start..." Lane nodded in Jacob's direction. "Stop canoodling with your boy toy here and get back to schmoozing and..." She paused as her phone vibrated in her purse. "Eh. It's probably Brad bugging me about who I've met so far." 

Kris frowned as Lane took a step away to look at her phone. Brad would probably have loved this opportunity. "I'm sure Brad thinks he should be here."

"Brad thinks he should be any where there is a photo op." Adam shrugged. "He gets off on that."

"Is that why you two broke up? Because he was an attention whore?" Kris asked abruptly as the thought occurred to him. 

"No." Adam shook his head. Kris had never asked before, but decided to ask now -- at the Oscars' after party. "What a totally random question. We broke up because he was unfaithful to me and when I found out, he lied about it."

"What was worse? The screwing around or the lying?" 

"At the time, I thought the lying was more important than the infidelity. Now, I'm not so sure, but it doesn't matter." Adam shrugged. "I won't do that to you and you won't do that to me. Right?" 

"I can totally promise that I won't be unfaithful. Totally." Kris squeezed Adam's hand and looked up into his eyes. "I will also promise that that worst lie I will ever tell you will be about your hair."

"What about my hair?" Adam panicked and pulled his hand free to gently touch his hair. "You told me it looked good. Lane told me it looked good. Even Jacob did. Are you saying it doesn't look good?"

"It does, it does... " Kris soothed. God, that had been stupid. Never joke with Adam about his hair, you idiot! Hadn't he been told that years ago? "Just don't shave the sides again. I hate that. I already told you that. Approximately a kajillion times."

Adam grinned. "Yeah, you said it's hard to find something to hold on to when I'm giving you a blow job." 

"Seriously. I'm totally serious. This is critical to my life!" Kris laughed. "Do I have to come with you to the hair dresser--"

"Hair dresser? What is this? 1952? Or Conway?" Adam teased. "They're called stylists. Hair stylists."

"Whoopdefrickindoo." Kris rolled his eyes. 

"Yeah, you mock, you who cuts your hair with manicure scissors." Adam shuddered.

"I don't do that any more! Sheesh!" Kris rolled his eyes. 

"Because I hid the scissors." Adam smiled as Kris nodded sheepishly. 

 

"You've changed." Geoffrey said quietly to Kris when he and Jacob found him stuck along the wall, taking occasional sips from his glass while his eyes carefully watched the room. Kris might not talk as much as Adam -- and who did -- but he was very observant. 

"According to Adam, I have a better haircut these days." Kris looked up and smiled genuinely at Geoffrey and nodded warily at Jacob. "How so?"

"When I first met you... what was that? Almost two years ago? You were quiet, almost shy. Now... not so much."

"I was... recovering." Kris began, then stopped. "No, I was hiding. I thought that if I was invisible no one would..." He thought, then explained, "Talk about me like they'd talked about me back there. Nasty, you know?"

"I do." Geoffrey patted Kris on the back. "But those days are over. Bloody hell, man, you did great tonight in those interviews!"

"Thanks. That means a lot coming from you." Kris smiled up at Geoffrey. "But I never intend upon doing it again. Never. In the future, I'm comin' in the side door with Ben Affleck." 

Jacob nodded in agreement. "Are you having a good time here? Not exactly your scene, is it? Bet you'd like a tractor pull or hog roast better, wouldn't you?"

"Jacob." Kris glared at the man, then grinned suddenly. Jacob had reminded him of someone and he'd just realized who -- his second cousin twice removed whose parents had moved to Memphis and who never knew how to fit in with his more countrified cousins when he returned 'home' for reunions. Ack... if he ever went back to Conway, he'd probably have trouble fitting in these days too. "Actually, I am having a good time."

"How so? You hate these red carpet events and what's the word you use...." Jacob tapped his chin with a fingertip, middle fingertip. "Ah yes, it took me a moment since I don't believe I've heard that word since an unfortunate exposure to Hee Haw while stuck in Oklahoma City during a blizzard... Highfalutin. That's it. I thought you hated these highfalutin events." 

"Well, there are compensations." Kris nodded at Adam and ran his eyes up and down the long expanse of   
Adam's body. "First, I got to watch him getting dressed and doing his make up. Then I get to stand next to him --- did you ever notice how good he smells?"

"I may have--" Jacob grunted. 

"Or just look at him from up close all glammed up. I mean, god, look at him. He's so fucking hot. Those pants... Mmm..."

Geoffrey rolled his eyes. "And they get even tighter when you're whispering god knows what into his ear, which is--"

"One of the joys of my life. Then, I get to take him home and undress him and I know it seems impossible, but he's even hotter naked. Then I get to --"

"I get the picture!" Jacob growled.

"Well, if you follow us into the men's room, you might, because I don't know if I can make it home tonight. Then again, if any photos do surface, Adam might kill you." Kris paused. "But wait. you wouldn't be around to kill because you wouldn't be on Adam's team any more, would you?"

"Bitch!" Jacob snapped and stalked off, then began laughing. He'd been got. The little guy was a damn good knight in plaid armor for Adam tonight. As he'd predicted. He did know best after all. Because even though he didn't have a romantic bone in his body, even he could see love when it was right in front of him. And so would the world when those interviews came out. He nodded and set off to find that photographer. You could never have too much insurance, after all. 

Geoffrey smiled. "You give as good as you get these days, Kris."

"That's my job," Kris winked as he walked away, intent on claiming his spot next to Adam. 

"Hey..." Adam smiled as he felt the warmth and weight of Kris leaning into him. Sliding his arm around Kris, he let out a breath and felt the warmth radiate through him. "I missed you." 

"I could tell." Kris rolled his eyes. "You were so busy yakking it up, you never even noticed that I was gone." 

"Are you pouting? Do you need some attention?" Adam cooed with a smile playing at the edges of his lips.

"I do. Let's go to the men's room."

Bursting out laughing, Adam pulled Kris into his arms. "I love you, did I mention that?"

"Not for the last few hours. I'm feeling insecure..." Kris teased, lifting his face up as Adam's hand gently touched his cheek. He felt anything but insecure with Adam; Adam made him feel safe and happy and like everything was right with the world. "Thank you..." he whispered just before Adam's lips touched his in a soft slow kiss. 

**_FLASH!!!!!_ **

 

 

"Well, Jacob got his picture..." Kris muttered as he tossed OK! magazine down on the breakfast table a few days later. "He messengered this over." 

Huh?" Adam muttered sleepily, looking down into his cup of coffee. He had not appreciated waking up alone, hearing Kris talking on the phone to godknowswho at godknowswhattime, especially given that he'd woken up from a great dream and--

"Good morning, sunshine!" Kris called out in a loud tone, hiding his grin, then jumping out of the way as Adam swatted at him. 

"I am not a morning person. Have I mentioned that to you previously? Or could you have possibly made a note of that fact on any of the hundreds of mornings we've woken up together? Slow learner or what?"Adam grumbled, belatedly realizing that Kris was naked in the kitchen. Opportunity was knocking. He hid his grin in his coffee. 

"Wow. Grumpmeister. Hungry? I'll make one of your disgusting protein shakes-- Oh!" Kris shrieked as   
Adam picked him up and plopped him down on the table in front of his chair. "Wha...."

"I do want a protein shake." Adam jiggled Kris' hips.

"Wut?" Kris asked in confusion, then laughed as Adam tickled his balls. "How--"

"There must be protein in cum, right? Bodily fluid and all?" Adam encircled the base of his cock with his hand, while his thumb flicked under the cock head and he quickly began to harden. "And didn't the deal you insisted we make state that you have to provide me with breakfast?"

"I'll..." Kris reached out for Adam, running his hands through Adam's hair, then down his neck and across his shoulders and holding on. "I'll do anything for you. You know that. I even did interviews on the red carpet for you." 

"Yes and giving me your cock and your cum is just as hard as those interviews? Well, something is indeed hard..." Adam teased, before bending his head and making Kris wiggle and moan his way to a damn good morning. Pulling back after Kris cried out and fell back onto the table, Adam lifted his head and grinned. Reaching for his still-warm cup of coffee, he held it up and said brightly, "Mmm. Kris' cum and coffee. What a way to start my day!" 

Kris burst out laughing. "Really, it's too bad that you didn't accept that commercial for coffee! I can hear that tag line now, see your face on the sides of buses..." He trailed off, distracted, as Adam stood up and shucked his shorts. Cock. Adam's cock. 

Bending once more, Adam lapped softly at the head of Kris' cock, cleaning it with his tongue, determined to coax every last bit of pleasure from Kris. "Yeah, with a white mustache, only not from milk..."

"You..." Kris laughed, then dropped his head back to gasp for breath and moan as ripples of pleasure radiated out like the ripples from drops of cream into a cup of coffee. He reached up blindly for Adam as Adam's mouth traveled up over his hip, tongue tracing over his ribs before reaching his nipple and sucking hard. Pressing his knees against Adam's shoulders, Kris arched under Adam's mouth. 

"You are so hot, so needy..." Adam muttered as he licked his way over to Kris' other nipple and Kris automatically turned his body into Adam's mouth. He curled his hands around Kris' rib cage and pulled him up higher, sucking harder as he felt Kris shiver under his ministrations and felt Kris' hands clench tighter on his shoulders as he slid his legs down to wrap around Adam's hips. 

"Need you..." Kris gasped, opening his eyes to watch Adam suckle on his nipple. "Damn, that's so hot..." He gaped as Adam pulled his mouth away and he saw his hard distended nipple point up at Adam's talented mouth, those wickedly curved lips that could bring him to ecstasy from singing or sucking. "My nipple looks like it wants you..." He muttered. "It's yours. I'm yours... Anything you want..."

"Really..." Adam slid his tongue forward and teased the tip of Kris' needy little nipple, watching as Kris' own tongue slipped out to lick his lips as he watched as if mesmerized, then groan and drop his head back once again as he shoved his chest forward as if intent on pushing his nipple as deeply into Adam's mouth as possible. Well, this was apparently tripping Kris' trigger. He sucked back, releasing the nipple only to brush his lips against the tip over and over, smiling against it as Kris grumbled in frustration and tried to push his head back. "What a hot little nipple... Mine, you said. Maybe you should wear my ring there..." Adam opened his mouth and gently nipped with his teeth, then gently tugged. "Would you like that? I could pull on it with my teeth... " 

"Oh fuck..." Kris groaned as Adam's words sent him spiraling higher and oh yeah... his big cock thrusting against his stomach made his own cock twitch and harden. 

"It would mark you as mine. Would you like that?" Adam whispered, his voice low and husky as he raised up to thrust hard and fast against the tight smooth skin of Kris' abdomen, rubbing over the ridge of his hip bone, teasing Kris' cock against his own pelvis with his thrust. 

"Mark me now, come all over me..." Kris begged, crossing his ankles behind Adam's ass and arching up against his pelvis. "Come all over me..."

"You want that?" Adam demanded. He pulled Kris' hand from his shoulder, kissed the palm then licked it, before licking up to the tip of Kris' ring finger, sucking it quickly inside his mouth, imitating the movements he'd made earlier on Kris' cock. He sucked and swirled his tongue, while his hand slid up Kris' body, watching him arch eagerly and needfully under his touch, then nearly jerk as Adam plucked at his nipple, pinching and pulling it. "I could put a ring right in there... But right now..."

"Right now...." Kris groaned, blindly reaching out with his own hands, frantically sliding down, finally groaning with satisfaction as they closed around Adam's cock. "Mark me, come... I want to see you come all over me..." He panted as they both thrust and touched and watched each other, their bodies lifting and falling against each other, hands stroking and teasing until Kris watched Adam's eyes darken and his lips part, his voice, that sweet voice of his, cry out Kris' name.

"Mine... All over..." Adam cried out as he came all over Kris and Kris stared wide-eyed and fell back.

"Yours... Everywhere, anywhere..." Kris confirmed as he too fell into the need. 

"Wow..." Adam whispered as he stood up and stared down at Kris, who was looking blankly up at him as if he'd been pulled from some vortex onto solid ground. Bending over, he tenderly kissed Kris, smiling as Kris' hands once again tightly held onto his shoulders and his lips clung. "Hold on..." He whispered as he stepped away to grab paper towels. 

"I wish..." Kris stared as Adam cleaned him up. "I want some way..."

Adam's gaze snapped to Kris' face. "I do too. We'll come up with something together."

"Together. We make a good team..." Kris whispered, reaching out for Adam's hand and holding it. "Never gonna let you go. We belong together. We're meant to be together."

"We are." Adam lifted Kris' hand and gently kissed the palm. "It was in the stars. I know it." 

"I'm believing that too." Kris swallowed hard and sat up, his hand brushing against the forgotten magazine. "Oh that.. that's what started it all this morning?"

"Yeah, what was going on ? What were you carrying on about before, anyway, hedgehog?" Adam remembered as he turned aside to throw away the paper towel.

"You know what? I like mornings..." Kris grinned and jumped off the table to lightly slap Adam's naked butt. "This one turned out way better than I expected." 

"My life has turned out better than I expected, but seriously -- what was going on before? The phone calls, the door bell, you muttering about Jacob's picture..." 

"These pictures in OK! magazine. We're kissing! And... _looking_ at each other." Kris picked up the magazine and showed it to Adam. 

"Oh." Adam smiled slowly as he looked at the magazine. "What's the problem? Those are actually lovely pictures."

"But but it's taking an intimate moment and putting it out there for everyone..." Kris protested.

"But we choose to have that moment in public, Kris." Adam shrugged. "We made that choice. We were in control, so we can't complain. And frankly..." He smiled again. "Maybe this is a sign of my insecurity and my own neediness, but... I don't mind everyone being able to see that look on your face."

"I do look hopelessly in love with you," Kris agreed.

"There's nothing hopeless about it," Adam countered. "Given that I'm looking at you the same way."


	36. Consequences, unintended and otherwise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks
> 
> Notes: This chapter includes a peek at life in Kris' Arkansas. Some readers may be uncomfortable with the ideas expressed. Sadly, the ideas and dialogue are based upon my experience with small town life in a socially conservative area. The song Tommy and Scarlett sing is "I'd like to buy the world a Coke" which was a song from hugely popular tv commercial for Coca-Cola beginning in 1971.

**Chapter 36: Consequences, unintended and otherwise**

"The dick pic? Remember?" Adam asked. "It seemed like the worst moment of my life, but now? Just a dim memory. Just like finding out that boyfriend of mine was an asshole -- same story, different kind of sex. That will happen to you too, Dani. The dim memory, I mean." 

"It's totally different! I'll never forgive myself -- how can I?" Danielle whispered, looking down at the salad she'd done more picking at than eating. "That dick pic -- yeah, you were super embarrassed, but you didn't involve other people in your mistake."

"Didn't I?" Adam shook his head and nudged Dani's hand back to her fork. She'd given up that stupid grapefruit diet, but had stopped eating when she began her millionth apology several minutes ago. "I became paranoid and distrustful. I know I hurt people or at least made their lives more difficult. And what's worse is that I'm ... well, I'm not sure how long I would have stayed that way, if that response wouldn't have become a bad habit and then grown into bitterness, if the universe didn't decide to right the wrong and send Kris into Starbucks that day. And -- I'm making it all about me, so suffice to say, honey, we all make mistakes." Adam curled his hand around Danielle's and lifted it up. " _Everyone._ That's a lesson I had to learn a few years ago -- no matter how smart or careful we are, we all make mistakes. And here's another lesson -- the hardest person to forgive is yourself for your own bad judgment." 

Dani nodded. Adam had gotten over his suspiciousness and moved forward. If he could do it, so could she. She had to. "I... guess so. I just wish... I'm so sorry. And Kris... poor Kris, he had to be in the spotlight to do damage control on his own reputation. He was totally innocent of anything except being in my circle of friends. I know how much he hates being the center of gossip and he had to go on the Oscars red carpet! Is he ever going to forgive me?"

"He doesn't think there's anything to forgive _you_ for! He's pissed at Brian, not you. Don't forget that. And you know what..." Adam squeezed Dani's hand. "Kris was a nervous wreck beforehand, but he was fanfreakingtastic on the red carpet. I think it gave him confidence, helped him learn about how to overcome fears, and to walk proud despite rumormongering -- a lesson I've had to learn too. He probably won't admit it, but he had a great time. I know _I_ had a great time. What with all the talk of turkey basters."

A giggle escaped Dani's lips, the first time she'd laughed since Adam had broken the news of Brian's perfidy to her. "That was funny. I thought Kris was going to pee his pants when you brought up the turkey basters and the moist meat."

"So did I. Additionally, our run down the red carpet seems to have made Brian go back into the hole he apparently crawled out of. That red carpet experience did nothing but yield positive results. Proving that sometimes something bad can lead to something good." 

"I hope..." Dani sighed and picked up her fork, stabbing it hard into a cherry tomato. She smiled as her tine penetrated the skin and juice squirted out. 

 

Poke

Poke

Poking her index finger at the power button of her lap top in impatience, Kim Allen sat down hard on her kitchen chair. She looked at the clock, then over her shoulder. Screw it. She'd had enough this week of hearing from every fool in town about those red carpet interviews and she was going to watch for herself and make her own mind up, thankyouverymuch, Pearline and Darla and Tucker and Pastor and yes, Neil Allen. 

 

_Jumping as a swirl of blue cotton candy hair popped up over the back of a mound of bright red peppers, Kim Allen covered her hand with her mouth and bit back a swear word. "Pearline?"_

_"I found you."_

_"Oh lord, save me..." Kim whispered. "Give me strength."_

_"I knew it! You're praying in the produce! That's gettin' way too close to tree worship. On top of everything else! You need help. Let me help you!" Pearline smiled as she walked around the display._

_"I'd like your help in getting my teeth as white as yours..." Kim said absently. Pearline had the whitest, biggest teeth... Like a... wolf! A wolf in cotton candy, what with the blue hair and pink polyester pant suit. Where did she find a pink polyester pant suit anyway?_

_"I sell a kit in my shop. Y'all should come over some time and I kin fix you raaht up." Pearline smiled and patted the top of her hair. "And we can talk about how Rahab and David can assist you in your time of need."_

_"You named your snakes Rahab and David?"_

_"Perfect, ain't it?" Pearline nodded. "They were both warriors, although we don't rightly know much about Rahab since she was a woman and we need to hide our lights under the bushel."_

_Kim blinked. Since when did hiding one's light under a bushel include blue hair -- blue hair that she was sure glowed in the dark. The church prohibited alcohol, but surely an exception might be made for days that included Pearline and her snakes. And that hair! Why people commented on the blue streak that Kris'....boyfriend occasionally put in his hair, when there were way worse hair styles right here in Conway... well, that didn't seem quite fair. "Thanks for the offer, Pearline. Truly, but--" Kim gasped when Pearline slapped her hand on Kim's arm and squeezed tightly._

_"Don't you want your son on the path to righteousness? Wouldn't you do anything to bring him back home? Has anything you tried worked? No!" Pearline crowed. "Y'all come to me. They all end up coming to me. My snakes can suck the venom outta him right quick. We start with the arm." She squeezed Kim's arm again._

_Staring at the bottle of cooking wine in her hand, Kim licked her lips. She wondered how much she'd have to drink to forget about Rahab and David and the image of their fangs in Kris' arm. Putting the bottle back in her cart, she realized there probably wasn't enough alcohol in the world. She shuddered and looked back up at the peppers. She still needed one. But maybe a red pepper was just too... common._

_"Kim." The pastor patted Kim Allen on the shoulder and stood waiting._

_"Yes, Pastor?" Kim looked up from the mound of red peppers and looked quizzically at her pastor._

_"If you have any need to see me pastorally, please don't hesitate to call."_

_"I... well, thank you, but..." Kim paused. If her pastor was telling her bad news, why would he do so in the Piggly Wiggly produce department? "Is there something I should know? Is Neil alright? Or Daniel?"_

_"No, no, they're fine. It's about the sheep that has gotten lost away from his flock."_

_"Kristopher." Kim took a deep breath. Even after four years, the pain of loss still cut through her chest. Why wasn't it getting better? Was this pain telling her something? "Is there some specific reason you're bringing him up today?"_

_"Those interviews. On the red carpet at the Oscars. The Oscars are watched worldwide, so I can only imagine your distress at knowing your son's sin is being known on such a scale."_

_"Oh." Kim grabbed a pepper and inspected it carefully, while debating what to say. She hadn't seen those interviews, although Cale had told her about them on Sunday night. Apparently someone in their circle of friends had proved to be a blackmailing backstabber and Kris and...boyfriend had gone on the offensive via the red carpet. Cale had told her it was a good strategy and she might alsoo want to look at those interviews to see how Kris and his .... boyfriend interacted. Neil had exploded that they didn't need to see their son's perversions and had insisted they not watch either the Oscars red carpet or any of the entertainment shows. Cale had later texted her with links to websites. She hadn't looked them up, but she hadn't deleted the texts either. Given how many people were commenting on them since Sunday, Kim had to admit she was growing more curious by the second. "I take it you_ saw _his interviews on the red carpet."_

_"I did. I've watched them all, including the full-length versions on the various web sites. You must know you did the right thing. Your faith was strong, but you needed proof. Proof found in those interviews, I'm sure. And yet I know how deeply you must be distressed."_

_"Well. I don't pay attention to gossip since you're always rightfully sermonizing against it, but bless your heart for being so concerned that you'd bring it up amongst the peppers." Kim glared. She knew she was glaring. She also knew she didn't care that she was glaring. So much for her desire to avoid being a center of gossip -- when even the pastor felt the need to bring it up in public, why bother worrying? Was this... one of those moments of clarity Oprah talked about? "And amongst other parishioners. I'm sure they must feel gratified that you care so deeply about your flock that you seek them out in public."_

_"You are distressed."_

_"I... am in a hurry. Pardon me, Pastor, but I need to do my shopping and get home to make dinner. Another time?" Kim smiled and turned away, plowing her cart ahead. She probably should have apologized, but she was sick of people acting as if Kris were the worst sinner to ever walk the streets of Conway. Wasn't everyone a sinner who needed to repent in some way?_

_"I'm sorry."_

_"Excuse me?" Kim Allen narrowed her eyes at Darla as they both waited for coffee to brew in the breakroom at work._

_"I'm so sorry, Kim...." Darla patted Kim's arm._

_"About what?"_

_"You know..." Darla looked from left to right, then back at Kim. "About Kris."_

_"What about Kris?"_

_"We saw him on Entertainment Tonight with that...what do those people call their... well, the people they do their perverted acts with?"_

_"Your husband?" Kim smirked, then smoothed out her face. Damn, that had been unkind. Everyone knew how Darla's husband spent most of his free time at Selective Video in Little Rock. Everyone pretended they didn't know -- to Darla's face. Behind her back... lots of snickering, which is what she'd wanted to avoid, desperately wanted to avoid, with Kris._

_"Excuse me?" Darla blinked. "I must have misheard..."_

_"You must have. So you saw Kris on the Oscars red carpet with his boyfriend?" Kim asked loudly, then winced. Boyfriend. That was the first time she'd said the word out loud. Boyfriend. Boyfriend. "I haven't seen the interview, but Cale tells me that Kris was on the Oscar red carpet with his boyfriend. Boyfriend is the word you're looking for."_

_"Nope." Darla shook her head and her ponytail swayed from side to side. "My Deanna has a boyfriend. You remember -- she was head cheerleader and he was the football receiver. That's her boyfriend. Kris has... well, something else."_

_"Something else..." Yeah, Kris has an employed boyfriend who hasn't spent the last year sitting on his girlfriend's couch drinking Budweiser when he's not out catting around with other women, Kim thought but refrained from saying. Surely that made her a better person. At least her child wasn't involved with some man-slut... Oh. That assumed that Kris's boyfriend, yes, there she thought it again, wasn't catting around either, which homosexuals were supposedly likely to do. But really... Kim mused as she watched Darla smugly pour her coffee, although how one could smugly pour coffee she didn't know..._

_But what did she know about anything lately? She'd thought Kris would come home, tail between his legs, repentent and willing to live according to their rules, the rules she'd thought were right... but Cale said he wasn't coming home, that he had a new... Kim swallowed hard and almost pushed Darla out of the way to get her coffee so she'd have something to swallow. She took a gulp and winced at the heat. That Kris had a new family. That he was happy, really happy. She touched her hot throat wondering if this was another painful moment of epiphany. "Well, now, if Deanna is happy with that boyfriend of hers, then that's all that matters. And bless your heart, thank you for your concern. But my family is doing fine...Now, I'm sorry, but I have to get back to work."_

_"I hear tell your Kris and his rock star boyfriend were on Fashion Police on E! News last night," Tucker said as he bagged up a take-out order from Chik-Fil-A._

_"You watch Fashion Police?" Kim asked, raising an eyebrow. "A good ol' boy like you? That's fascinatin'."_

_"No, of course not. I'm a man!" Tucker laughed nervously. "I'm married and all. But my wife may have mentioned it. She likes watching it after she gets home from visiting her daddy at the pokey on Fridays."_

_"Do tell." Kim hurriedly scanned her debit card through the machine and tried her best not to tap her fingers on the tiny formica counter next to it as she stared at the screen, wishing it would. Hurry. Up. Already. Everyone was staring, no doubt thinking about Kris, whispering behind their paper napkins and... half of them had skeletons in their family's armoires, but why was Kris the scariest skeleton of all? Although Tucker didn't have a mean bone in his body, so he probably wasn't saying anything mean. Maybe she was getting paranoid. Or maybe the problem was that she'd been paranoid. And that couldn't be a good idea, even if... She looked over her shoulder and yup, people were looking at her. No mistake._

_"Miz Allen--" Tucker tapped the screen. "You need to sign right there. I do have to say that -- according to my wife -- Kris was laughing, having a fine time, looked good. She said he had a damn fine jacket on. Which makes sense 'cause I hear those gays know their fashion." He handed her the plastic bag. "We were glad to know he's doin' good, to tell the truth, ma'am."_

_"Kris looked good? He was laughing?" Kim froze, her hands clenching around the plastic handles of the take-out bag._

Looking down at her hands, still tight with tension, Kim looked up when she heard her son's voice over the computer speakers once again. For the last hour, she'd been poking around the internet, reading, working herself up to these interviews. And now.. She could hear the laughter in his voice. So... he wasn't stricken with guilt, hiding, unhappy, he was... She gaped. He looked tan and healthy and happy. He even looked to have some faint laugh lines around his mouth, a sign that he laughed often. He... he wasn't a young man any more. He was... a man now. And that _was_ a damn fine jacket that... Kris couldn't have changed enough to be able to pick out a fashionable jacket like that. No way. She raised her hand to the mouse and moved the progress bar back to listen again. Oh. His boyfriend had picked out the jacket. That made sense. Kris thought plaid was the height of fashion since it was a pattern. Smiling, she replayed the interview with the blond lady with the pretty name and then froze. Had... Kris mentioned a baby? She gasped. Oh no, oh no, she was losing-- 

" _Where is he?_ "

Kim jumped again, her hand on her chest. "You startled me!"

"Where's Kris? I heard his voice--" Neil Allen began, then stopped as he saw the open laptop in front of his wife. "What the hell..."

"I...Everyone was talking about those interviews and I decided to watch them for myself. Be informed. And..." Kim sat up straight. "Kris is happy. He's in love and he's happy. Look at him." 

"Ha. Well, sinners often think they're happy."

"But if you think you're happy, aren't you happy?" Kim asked. 

"He lied to us for years. What makes you think he's not lying now?"

"Lying about what?" Kim asked, confused, looking from the image of Kris laughing on her computer screen to her husband's red face. 

"Being happy and in love. That's just... wrong. He can't really be happy being... _that_!" Neil twisted his mouth and pointed toward Kim's computer screen which was paused on an interview from the red carpet, in a scene where that tall freak was hugging Kris. Thank god he'd come home early from a guy's night out so he could discover that his wife had lost her damn mind. He knew that to be true because she was smiling, actually smiling, while watching their son announce to the world that he was a sinner. As if Conway wasn't bad enough. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing. I was thinking..." Kim rubbed the back of her neck.

"Why? You already _know_ he's wrong in what he's doing!"

"Everybody was telling me about these interviews and sympathizing with me like he was a convicted murderer! Even Darla whose entire family...Argh! But my son is the monster?" She shook her head. "And Cale--"

"Him!" Neil scoffed. "He's being led down the path of destruction too with all his talk of moving to LA!"

"Did you just interrupt me?" Kim snapped, her emotions raw from having spent the last hour watching footage, seeing photographs and reading accounts of Adam Lambert's fans meeting Kris. And read an occasional comment about "poor Kris" and his "horrible" family. She had realized with the sort of wrenching shock that only a mirror could provide that strangers knew far more about her son and his life than she did. How could that be right? How? 

"He's obviously happy. Not just _saying_ he is. But really. Look at him." Kim Allen pointed toward her computer monitor. "Look at his face. He's--"

"He's a liar," Neil repeated. 

"Miz Allen? Mr. Allen?" Cale's voice called out. "The front door was open..."

"Kinda like my son's legs..." Neil muttered as he stomped towards the front door and pointed his finger at Cale's chest as he walked toward him. "You. You're almost as bad as Kris. Who used to be my son. And is now a liar and---" 

"He didn't lie. He just didn't tell all the whole truth. It wasn't like he dated some girl and pretended to be straight," Cale retorted. Damn. He had hoped that Mrs. Allen's interest in seeing what Lane would call "the intel" on Kris might be a turning point, but damndamndamn Mr. Allen had gotten to her before he did. He glared at Kris' father. Kris would still be here if not for him or he might not have gotten so lost for so long. Then again, as this moment proved, Kris was way better off out in California. "He didn't tell the whole truth and we all know why -- because he was afraid of --"

"Real men aren't afraid. Which goes to prove my point-- if you take it up the ass, you're not a real man."

 

"You need to put away your booty," Adam suggested, his fingers trailing down Kris' bare back.

"Are my shorts falling down?" Kris asked, twisting around and pulling up on his swim shorts at the same time.

"Tragically, no. Just like the amount of glitter in life, there's not enough of your bare ass." Adam grinned and pointed at Kris' backpack, stashed at the back of the canvas beach cabana the hotel provided. "No, I meant your doubloons. They're falling out of your backpack."

"Oh!" Kris laughed and bent over to stuff the Dollar Store doubloons back inside and pulled out the books they'd brought along for what Adam had called a 'quiet day at the beach unless the paps show up.' He zipped the backpack up and tossed it aside, handing Adam his book. "Did you have a good time geocaching today?" 

"Yes. Even if we didn't talk about fetishes." Adam set his book aside. He'd much rather talk to Kris, which gave him a good reason to look at Kris. A Kris who was now mostly naked. Yup, a good day. Thank the gods for an unseasonably hot day in March. 

"We can so talk about fetishes!" Kris sat down next to Adam on the blanket and grinned at him. Poking him in the stomach -- the tee-shirt-covered-stomach, Kris ordered, "You start." Like with your fetish for covering up, Kris thought silently. 

"I don't have any. I"m totally vanilla." 

Kris snorted. "Yeah, if it's vanilla with nuts on top."

"Ooh ice cream!" Adam groaned and rubbed his stomach. "I could go for some ice cream. It's been so long..."

"I can go get you some at the stand," Kris offered instantly. If Adam was actually willing to forget about his stupid diet, he'd race for the ice cream.

"Later...." Adam stroked Kris' hand, his fingertips gently brushing down Kris' middle finger. "Don't forget Lane's rule for us. No--"

"Ice cream in public," Kris finished, then blushed as he remembered a day on the beach on the island of Capri that involved dripping ice cream and damp shorts. And Tommy's amused face and Lane's furious one. 

"Then again..." Adam bent his head and licked the tip of Kris' finger. When he felt the instant trembling in Kris' hand, he looked back up. "Lane's not here, is she?" 

"Ha! No, she's not. I'll be right back!" Kris jumped up and ran toward the refreshment stand. 

 

"Oh shit, there's a pap..." Kris groaned as he pointed toward a circular flash of light behind some bushes. He'd been hoping to _enjoy_ that vanilla ice cream cone he'd gotten Adam. 

"So?" Adam shrugged. "All I'm doing is licking my ice cream cone. Totally innocent." He tilted his head and gave a long slow lick around the entire cylinder of ice cream, then slid his mouth up to suck the tip into his mouth. 

"Totally evil..." Kris groaned, even as he kept his eyes glued to Adam's mouth. Which was doing all sorts of licking and biting and sucking things that were probably illegal to do in public. And now... "Must you make those noises?" Kris hissed, swearing he could feel the vibrations from Adam's nearly inaudible moan in the skin right behind his balls. 

"I must. You know how expressive I am..." Adam grinned as he watched Kris' eyes stay on his mouth. He felt his pale skin flush with pleasure. Yeah, yeah, you were responsible for your own self esteem, but he'd never felt this good about himself before Kris. 

"I'm gonna come in my shorts..." Kris hissed under his breath, fighting the urge to palm himself. "Last time you pulled this..." 

"That was a happy memory from Capri." Adam laughed. "I've always regretted that there weren't pictures of the rapt look on your face, so here's my chance..."

"No way!" Kris yelped. "Not in public." He turned on his side to present his back to the camera, god he hoped there was only one and bumped into... "Uh, the glambulge... Can't have that out there for the public..."

"What are you going to do?" Adam challenged, sucking the ice cream cone deep into his mouth, then slowly pulling it out. "I have an idea, you can pull down the privacy--"

"I have an idea too!" Kris grabbed the cone in one hand, Adam's waistband in the other and then quickly shoved the cone down Adam's shorts. "Ha! Solves all our problems!"

"Oh no, it doesn't!" Adam growled, reaching for Kris. 'Damn, that was cold!"

Throwing himself forward out of the cabana, Kris scrambled on the shifting sands, then giggled as he felt Adam's hand brush his heel. Nearly tumbling onto his face, he righted himself and felt a thud and a muttered curse word as Adam fell behind him. He scampered toward the water, shrieking with laughter.

"You're in so much trouble!" Adam yelled, pausing to pull the damp and smashed wafer cone out of his shorts and toss it onto their blanket while watching Kris run out of reach. Just as well to let Kris get ahead. There was no fun in a game of catch-me-if-you-can that ended too early. "I could've bent something -- something you like nice and straight!"

"Hey, be glad I shoved that ice cream down your shorts and got the glambulge under control or that face plant might have caused damage!" Kris taunted as he zigged and zagged away from Adam at the water's edge. He laughed at the sheer joy of playing around with Adam Fucking Lambert looking at him like _he_ was the light of his life on a bright sunny day. Who would have ever thought this would be his life? 

"Ugh.." Adam stopped to hold his sticky shorts away from his body. "You are so dead, Allen. Look at me!" He pointed to the white ice cream melting down his legs in rivulets. 

"You're dripping, but not in a good way..." Kris teased, then seeing the predatory look on Adam's face took off running into the surf. "Uh-hooh, you can't get me and -- Hoo, shit! That's cold!" He shrieked in shock, stumbling back and running full tilt into Adam's body. "Mmm. You're warm..." He smiled and turned around, throwing his arms around Adam's neck. 

"Watch it, because the paps are watching us..." Adam warned. "I know how you hate being part of the gossip industry." He smiled, thinking of one of Kris' endless rants on the topic. 

"You know what? Today, I don't care. I already went through hell back in Conway..." Kris paused when he saw that look on Adam's face that meant he had a thought that was probably bossy and he was trying to stop from saying it. He knew Adam was committed to trying to be less bossy, but truth was, he usually liked Adam's bossiness. And he'd die of curiosity anyway. "What is it? Tell me." 

Looking at the bushes, trying to find the damn photographer, Adam frowned. The consequences of Kris' flight from Conway needed... mitigation. Kris needed to get back to his music and Adam had a strong suspicion that Kris' reluctance to push forward on it was due in part to associating it with Conway... as though everything back there was too hot to touch again. "Your parents were assholes and I know you were in so much pain, but... you didn't go through hell _in_ Conway, but really afterwards, when you left--"

"Are you going to get fucking pedantic with me about that?" Kris asked incredulously, then slapped his own forehead. Of course, Adam was going to get pedantic. He had this _thing_ about getting your own story straight and not -- what he called -- lying to yourself in the process. 

"Well, but you didn't stick around to get hell from anyone else. It wasn't like you were Carrie at the prom, with everyone conspiring against you to embarrass you publicly. Or like some of the kids we've talked to, who are the victims of terrible, on-going mass bullying. I mean, it's not like you wouldn't have gone through hell had you come out back there, but you didn't come out and you didn't go through hell with everyone. I'm not trying to diminish your pain..."

"You're trying to put it into perspective. I know, you've said that before." Kris glared, then pulled back to kick water towards Adam's face, laughing loudly as Adam, of course, had to kick even more water back towards him. 

"It's just sometimes, our fear of the consequence is greater than the reality of the consequence, don't you think? Sometimes it's not, sometimes the best thing to do is make a strategic retreat... The question is knowing when to do that and if so, when to re-emerge, you know?" Adam mused, thinking of a few lyric lines over which he'd been fretting. And Kris' dogged resistance to pushing his own music career forward. Seeing the truculence on Kris' face, Adam kept talking. "Or when is it better to stop hiding who we are, like you've done... because it's a kind of death to hide who we are and that can get to be a pattern because it's safe, right? And I diminished that, didn't I?" Adam stopped as a spray of salt water sprinkled his face and blinked. He looked down at Kris and smiled sheepishly. "And wow, that was fucking obnoxious of me, so sorry again." 

Looking closely at Adam, Kris realized Adam didn't know... he'd probably just been thinking aloud. Probably obsessing over some lyrics. The point of this day at the beach was supposed to be that Adam did _not_ work for a few hours. Geez. Turn the brain off, already! He kicked water again and shook his head when Adam blinked and returned to him. He always did. Now for a question of his own? "When have you ever been afraid? As an adult, I mean."

"Oh." Adam shook his head. He had been both bossy and inattentive. Great boyfriend he was. "Sorry. I was afraid of being alone and also afraid letting my heart get involved again a couple of years ago when this really cute guy was fumbling in his pockets for change in front of me at Starbucks.

"Hmm..." Kris smiled and then ducked his head to rub his cheek against Adam's shoulder. "And what changed your mind? My hot ass?"

"Nah. Lane. She browbeat me into it. I'm just as afraid of her as you are." 

"Lane!" Kris exclaimed. He playfully shoved Adam, then gasped when Adam fell over. "Ad--OH!" He shrieked when Adam swept his leg under Kris' knees and Kris tumbled down.

"Gotcha..." Adam laughed as he pulled Kris into his arms. "Oh wait, the paps--"

"I don't care. If someone doesn't like seeing me do this..." Kris bent his head and pressed a quick kiss on Adam's smiling lips. "They can kiss my ass."

"They'd have to fight their way through me." Adam winked. "That ass is mine. I still think you should get a tattoo back there..." 

 

"Doesn't it bother you that everyone knows now?" Neil Allen asked his wife as he looked at the back of her head in bed. Ever since she'd looked at those videos last week she'd been in a pissy mood and he didn't get it. Yeah, it wasn't easy turning your back on your own kin, but it was the right thing to do. If the right thing were the easy thing to do, it'd be called the easy thing. But a man had to do what a man had to do. 

"If everyone knows there's really not anything to be afraid of anymore." Kim froze. That was true, those words she'd just blurted out. Sometimes you faced the worst thing you could imagine and suddenly, it wasn't so horrible any more. Suddenly... other consequences seemed far more scary. She thought of the paparazzi videos she'd seen the other day showing Adam carrying Kris into a hospital ER after he'd gotten food poisoning many months ago. She hadn't been called, hadn't even known he was so sick. If the two boys hadn't mentioned starting a family in those interviews, she wouldn't have known about the possibility of being a grandmother some day. 

"But don't you care that our neighbors and friends are talking?"

"There are way worse things than everyone knowing the truth," Kim snapped, reaching out to turn off the light. She stared into the darkness, wondering what she was missing. 

 

"Why are there so many people out there tonight?" Kris asked, nodding toward the audience seated before the lit stage. He had played here twice before with only small crowds. Which had been fine. Just fine. 

Tommy shrugged as he pulled the bottle of beer away from his mouth. "Maybe the publicity you got from being on the red carpet with Adam?" Seeing the dismay on Kris' face, he added quickly, "Who cares as long as people listen?"

"Oh shit, I don't want---" Kris frowned. He stood up and made a step towards where Adam was, per usual, arguing with the sound guy then stopped when Neil Lambert grabbed his elbow and pulled him back. 

"Get over it," Neil suggested. He raised an eyebrow as everyone turned at him in surprise. "Hey, take it from me since I bitched and moaned about what Adam's fame meant with the best of them. But lesson learned -- some consequences in life can be changed and some have to be accepted. Like Adam arguing with the sound guy in his endless quest for perfection. And if those consequences are positive, it's time to stop bitching and just enjoy them. Like I had a damn good job, traveling all over, that I should have enjoyed. Like you enjoy the results of Adam arguing with the sound guy." 

"Everything okay?" Lane asked breathlessly as she finally reached the table in the corner and flung her bag down. "Why is Kris looking all prickly? And everyone else is looking in confusion at Neil?"

Scarlett shook her head. "Neil actually admitted to appreciating some aspects of Adam's fame and suggested Kris do the same."

"Bloody hell, it's happened." Lane looked around frantically. "The pod people have taken over!" She laughed as Neil threw a plastic cocktail sword at her and picked it up and pointed at Kris. "And you, sir. Just view it as an opportunity to have more people hear your music. Isn't that what every performer wants? Don't whine about having an audience, for godssakes!"

Kris pulled back at Lane's vehemence. "Yes, ma'am!"

"Dude, why you wanta hide your light under a bushel anyway?" Scarlett asked. "Either stay home with your guitar or let your light shine."

"Yeah and buy the world a Coke while you're at it!" Tommy teased. He leaned into Scarlett and they began singing, "I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony--"

"How about someone teaching you two to sing in harmony?" Neil griped.

"Oh, you want harmony?" Lane asked with an evil grin. "Let's take it from the top!" She pointed at Tommy and Scarlett and all three began to sing, I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony, I'd like to buy the world a Coke and keep it company!"

Kris winced, then rolled his eyes and spoke loudly. Crap, he'd gladly sing just to make Lane stop. "I'll take that Coke, but... I wanted to make it on my own. It's bad enough that I think I got this gig over other musicians pretty much because Adam Lambert is my boyfriend..."

Neil shrugged. "It's who you know. And that's true everywhere. Take advantage of every opportunity in life -- you never know when you're going to need every one." 

"But in this town it's not just who you know, it's who you blow," Kris blurted out. 

"Well, that sounds like a great line..." Adam said as he stood behind Kris, then laughed as Kris jumped. He slid his hands onto Kris' shoulders and feeling the tension, dug in with his fingers. "I can totally get into interpreting that lyric." 

Tommy grinned as Kris moaned with Adam's every touch. "For the song titled, 'Knowing and Blowing in LA'?"

Scarlett winked at Adam. He had asked her to help push Kris. "I think we should come up with an entire song. Kris can sing it after his break. Now, let's focus. What rhymes with lick?"

"Prick?" Lane asked, wide-eyed. "Perfect, actually. What rhymes with suck?"

"Duck!" Tommy offered enthusiastically. "Suck a duck!" 

"You really want to hang around for this discussion?" Neil asked Kris. "Really?" 

"I think I'll go sing. In front of this gratifyin'ly large audience." Kris lifted his head to smile up at Adam. 

"Good boy." Adam patted Kris on the head, grinning when Kris snapped at him with bared teeth. "Save those teeth--"

"What rhymes with teeth?" Tommy asked. 

"Hmm. Meat with a lisp?" Lane answered. "Meeth?"

"How about beneath?" Adam winked, then pulled Kris up and took his vacant chair. Slapping him on the butt, he told him, "Which is where you'll be later tonight. If you do a good job." 

"Job!" Tommy exclaimed. "There's a good word... Rhyming, rhyming... I got it! Polish the nob..."

"Polish. The. Nob. Oh, we're going to have a great song for you, Kris," Scarlett asserted. "The more time you give us to talk, the _better_ the song will be." 

"I'm going!" Kris exclaimed.

"Break a leg, hedgehog..." Adam patted Kris' butt and then gave him a light push. 

 

 

Taking a deep breath, Kim Allen stood up and hurried toward Cale's booth in the diner. With any luck she'd find out what she wanted before Neil got back from the men's room. She couldn't wait any longer. "Cale... Did you hear from Kris? How did his gig go last night?"

Wiping his mouth with a paper napkin, Cale nodded. "Great. He had quite a few people there. He sang a mix of cover songs and his own music."

"His own music." Kim smiled and clasped her hands together. "I always loved his music. I bet... I bet being around LA musicians, he's gotten even better."

"I bet being honest about his own self makes his music better too," Cale said quickly. Kris' mom had turned a corner after those Oscar interviews. He wasn't sure it was a permanent change yet, but it looked promising and he was going to press the point that Kris was himself changed from the guy his parents had thought they had known. "He said the biggest response was a song he wrote called, Circles of Joy." He grinned. "The audience doesn't know to the end that it's really about freckles. It's about Adam's freckles. Boy is covered with them."

"He is?" Kim smiled. "I would have never thought it..."

"He's a ginger. The black hair is dyed."

"Oh!" Kim shook her head. "Don't judge a book, right? So... " She took a deep breath and blurted out, "Does this Adam treat my boy right? The red carpet wasn't just for show?"

Cale nodded and grinned. "Adam may be... fierce and crazy on stage, but at home... he's a real nice guy. Now I'm not saying he'd be found dead working at Fleet Farm or wearing sneakers and he's seriously one of the bossiest people ever, but he's a stand-up kinda guy and he'd do anything for Kris." 

Glancing back over her shoulder, Kim said quickly, "I got that impression from the interviews. Also seemed like Kris wants kids..." 

"I don't think that's any time soon, Miz Allen," Cale warned. "Adam is super busy and Kris is just starting to get jobs, so it's not a perfect time. And Adam likes the timing of stuff to be perfect."

"Hope they don't wait too long." Kim sighed. "I want grandchildren to spoil rotten."

Cale's mouth dropped open. Well. That conversation he and Kris had at Adam's birthday party about how kids could repair breaches had turned out to be right. The jokes Adam and Kris had on camera about kids explained her turn-around, at least a little. Grandkids. "You'd want... Well, like I said, don't start knittin' booties just yet."

Kim shrugged. "There's no perfect time to have a baby, ever."

 

"Kris, can you come and pick me up? And by the way, grapefruits are tricky fruit. Tricky, tricky, tricky things, grapefruit. Laney knew. Did you know?" 

"Adam?" Kris stood up and began to walk toward the door to the garage. Adam had gone out with Dani and should have come home a while ago. "Did you have too much to drink? Is Dani drunk too? Do I need to drive her home too?" he asked, sliding his feet into flip-flops.

"No, don't be ridiculous. I'm... too shaken up. I shouldn't be driving. No, wait. I'll just call a cab. "

Freezing in the act of grabbing his car keys off the hook by the door, Kris licked his lips. His heart pounding as he wondered what news Adam had gotten... Wait. Hold it. If Adam was calling him for a ride, then... "What is it? Was there an accident? Are you two okay? And what the hell about grapefruit?"

"Apparently... Apparently..."

Kris tilted his head as he heard Dani's voice in the background, but it sounded like she was telling Adam to put his head between his legs and take an actual breath, half-laughing and half-crying. Kris nearly yelled into the phone, 'What _is_ it? I'm gonna freak out."

"Join the club!" Dani called out, obviously having heard his voice over Adam's phone. 

"Apparently..." Adam paused, then said in a loud rush, "Dani's pregnant and I'm going to be the father."


	37. Turkey baster bukkake

**Chapter 37: Turkey baster bukkake**

**Bang! Clatterkling!**

"Kris! Kris! Are you there?!" Adam yelled into the phone, while Dani broke into the first laughter she'd had since looking at the plus sign. "What's so funny?" he hissed at her while shoving her hip with the toe of his boot. 

"I...." Kris scrabbled around on the floor, reaching for the phone and his keys. "Hold on! There!" He gripped the phone in tight fingers. "What the hell did you just say? I dropped my phone and my keys, but I couldn't have heard right, right? I know Dani said you were her back-up sperm donor, but--"

"Back up SPERM DONOR?" Adam shrieked. "What the hell are you talking about?" He set the phone to speaker because maybe Dani could make some sense out of this. If she stopped laughing. 

"Yeah. But I didn't know you'd actually... donated! Don't you think that's the sort of thing we should talk about? Or do you consider your sperm solely your business and not mine?!" Kris challenged. 

"Donate? Sperm? Business?" Adam parrotted, looking down at Dani, who had slid off her couch onto the floor, laughing her ass off. Well, that was ... good, he supposed, given how distraught she had been just minutes ago. "I don't even..."

"Because I'd like to know if you're spraying your sperm around, changing our lives!"

"SPRAYING sperm?" Adam exclaimed. "Like what... a facial or bukkake? I don't--" 

"Bukkake? Is that some sort of fancy turkey baster? Did you do it with a turkey baster?" Kris yelled.

"I..." Adam sat down hard on the edge of the coffee table, then yelped as he slid off it on to the floor. "Turkey baster bukkake?"

"OHMIGOD, did you use _my_ turkey baster? The one your _mom_ gave me? That's just wrong." Kris shook his head. Lord knows he had lost most of his inhibitions the second Adam had touched him the first time, but still. There had to be limits somewhere. "Did you disinfect it before? And afterwards? Because turkey is full of germs --"

"Turkey baster? Like where? Our kitchen?" Adam made a circular motion with his hand next to his temple as he looked at Dani. Kris had gone crazy. And so had Dani, the way she was clutching her stomach and rolling on the floor. "I don't cook, so--" 

"Yeah. Did you do it on the table or the kitchen island? They'd be the right height."

"To do what?"

"You know... to be the sperm donor. Homemade-like." Kris waved his hand around. "You know, in Dani?"

"In Dani? OHMIGOD, NO! She's like... my sister! It would be like you basting Laney!"

"Are you calling Laney a turkey?" Kris asked in confusion. "Because Laney's never said anything about back up sperm donors." 

"And besides..." Dani choked out through her laughter. "Neither of you would know how to handle the girl parts."

"So you went to a clinic so they could handle the girl parts?" Kris accused. "When?"

"I didn't go to a clinic!" Adam hurried, trying to explain. He flicked Dani's cheek to get her to stop laughing like a crazy person. He was surrounded by crazy people. It was a sad and sorry situation when _he_ was the sane one in the group. "Or use a turkey baster or-- You know what, I'm not shaken up any more. Dani and I will come over to our house."

"Humph. Maybe I'll still be here and maybe I won't!" Kris picked up his keys and threw them on the tile floor once again.

**Clatterkling!**

He smiled. He liked the sound they made.

"Krisssss..." Adam began laughing.

"It's not funny! You're making babies with Dani without telling me?"

"Hedgehog..." Adam tried again. "Don't leap to conclusions like that. I'm not the _father_ father."

"What the hell does _that_ mean?" 

Dani snatched the phone away from Adam. "Men. Useless. Let me explain. Brian is the sperm donor, but as my mother warned me..." Dani trailed off and bit her lip, willing herself not to cry again. She looked up when Adam stroked her hair.

"Me too!" Adam inserted, hoping he could push her out of being stuck in sadness. "I warned you too."

"Yeah, you all-knowing boy behind the curtain."

"I guess I should be glad that at thirty-one, you're still calling me boy."

Dani kicked Adam and continued after taking a deep breath."Well, he... he wants nothing to do with me or the baby..." She could only hope he didn't try to find a way to make money from this. She bit her lip, regretting having told him at all. So much for doing the right thing. 

"I'm real sorry, Dani," Kris said softly, clenching his fists. He'd like to pound Brian... which meant Adam was probably making elaborate plans involving dismemberment. 

"Thanks." Dani swallowed hard and leaned into Adam's hand. "And Adam here, after freaking out about the news because here was a situation he couldn't control and concocting grandiose schemes involving dismemberment, calmed down--"

"That was calm?" Kris asked in disbelief. Then again, given how Adam had learned about the baby, then Brian, then made a decision... no wonder he was agitated. If nothing else, he was probably working hard at restraining his anger about Brian in front of Dani. 

"Well, yeah, actually." Dani smiled and wiped the tears from her eyes. She had cried all night, all day, cried all over her Mom and then Adam. His poor shirt was probably ruined, which had made her cry again and then Adam and Kris had made her cry tears of laughter. Thank god. But she really hoped the crying jags would end. Same with the morning sickness. "He calmed down, decided not to kill Brian with his bare hands and we talked for a long time. And he suggested... and we talked some more and....he's..."

"He's gonna be the daddy. The real dad." Kris smiled, first in relief, then excitement. "Awesome. Super awesome! Kickass awesome! Then I get to be the gay uncle! The guncle. Awesome!"

"So you're excited?" Adam confirmed. He'd assumed Kris would be happy about it, but realized when he picked up the phone to call Kris that it was a bad idea to assume. People surprised you all the time. 

"Hell, yeah! I just told you I wanted kids sooner than later -- or do you not remember the red carpet? Sheesh." Kris laughed. This was so great. Adam had done the right thing and made the best choice ever! They had so much to talk about and probably had to make Dani happy too. "So what are you two doing over in your little apartment? You both need to get over here and we'll watch chick flicks and eat ice cream and popcorn and call Brian all sorts of horrible names! And Adam probably wants to plan little leather onesies!"

Adam rolled his eyes. "OMG! That is what I was saying when I called you!"

"No, you didn't. You said that Dani was pregnant and you were going to be the father!"

"Stop being so... _literal_!" Adam argued. "Read between the lines."

"Lines? What lines?" Kris banged his head against the wall, then stopped. Damn, that hurt.

"Did you just bang your head against the wall? Don't do it. That hurts."

"No shit, Sherlock!" Kris put his hand on his chest. "I swear to God, one day you're going to give me a heart attack. A real live heart attack."

"Well, technically a real live heart attack would probably make you dead so--"

"Weren't you just telling me not to be literal?"

"Yeah, but it's way more fun to get you into major hedgehog mode." Adam grinned as Dani picked up her purse. "It calms me down."

"That's... perverse."

"No, perverse is Susan Boyle singing Wild Horses." 

"True that." Kris nodded. "So... you get Dani over here -- along with some of her dvds and pjs-- and I'll go get some ice cream and other junk food. But wait.... She needs to eat healthy."

"Aren't you always telling me ice cream is healthy?" Adam asked as he bent down and rummaged through Dani's stack of dvds. Chick flicks, that's what the girl needed. She loved Hugh Grant, so...yes, there they were. 

"Again, true that." 

"Dani -- go get some stuff so you can sleep over," Adam ordered. Dani stuck her tongue out, but went back to her bedroom. "So ice cream... you're not going to shove it down my pants again, are you?" 

"Hey, when we went to our hotel room, I licked your cone all clean for you."

"Well, you can have more of my cream later. Right now, priorities."


	38. Ball juggling

**Chapter 38: Ball juggling**

 

 _Note_ : the "video" from the movie Music and Lyrics that Dani loves can be seen here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVkU8dDSC9w&feature=related

 

"What kind of ice cream do you want?" Kris asked as he led Dani into the kitchen, after greeting her with a long hug at the door. 

"What are my options?" Dani asked as Kris opened the freezer with a flourish and she saw stacks of ice cream pints. She swallowed hard. For Kris, food was love and there was... "There's so much ice cream in there.." She began sniffling. Damn it, stop with the crying already!

"Holy shit, what aren't your options?" Adam asked incredulously as he automatically and unconsciously touched his stomach with one hand and patted Dani's back with the other. The fat and calories... Forget about it, Adam, he told himself as he used both hands to pul Dani close in a hug. Priorities, just like he'd told Kris. 

"Excuse me, sorry!" Dani shook her head. "I need a tissue. And the bathroom." 

The second Dani left the room, Adam turned back to Kris, relieved that he could drop the facade for a moment. He hissed, "I will kill him. I will."

"I get that feeling...." Kris said softly, having watched Adam's face change instantly to hardened anger, a look he had not been wearing when Dani was in the room. Adam was a better actor than he gave himself credit for, Kris thought, also glad Adam had never looked at him with such fury. He thought he might run if that ever happened. "What happened?"

"That Asshole ..." Adam felt his anger surge and his pulse pound. He slapped the kitchen island, while keeping his voice low. "Asshole at first denied the baby was his--"

"Well, whose else could it be?" Kris asked indignantly, his voice rising. "They've been dating for over a year, right?"

"Shh, keep your voice down. She's really emotional," Adam whispered. "So anyway, Asshole is saying Dani conceived the baby during one of their off periods and isn't his."

"We could only wish!"

"I know, right? Then he accused her of sleeping around while they were together."

"That son of a --" Kris slammed his fist into his palm. "I bet he's the one who was been sleeping around!"

"Exactly what I thought -- but didn't say, because Dani was upset enough. Obviously."

"You didn't say it?" Kris asked incredulously.

"I do have a filter when it means I'd hurt someone, Kris. Sheesh. You're the one with little faith and less trust."

"That's not true!" Kris protested.

"Oh, it is, you conclusion-leaper, but this isn't about us. Listen to my story about poor Dani. And you know what..." Adam took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he forced the anger down and refocused. "He may not have been sleeping around, we might be leaping to conclusions because we have good reason to hate him. Anyway, then he said she should have taken better steps to avoid this problem and that it wasn't going to be his problem. He told her that he hoped she wasn't planning on him sticking around for some brat. That he wasn't sure was his." Adam rubbed his throat, tight from the effort of keeping his voice down and his fury in check. Damn it, he felt incendiary, but had to control it for Dani's sake. She needed his compassion, not his anger right now.

"That asshole!" Kris felt his temples throb.

"And of course, even if she has a paternity test, is she ever going to see child support from him? He pretends to be a musician, but he's really a bum. A lazy bum. I can't abide laziness." Suppressing the urge to growl only because he knew it freaked Kris out, Adam tapped his fingers on the counter. 

Kris twisted his hands together. "You're right. He's never had some sort of steady job where they can garnish his wages and if he's like this asshole I know back in Arkansas, I wouldn't put it past him to leave the state and go do nothing somewhere else so he can avoid paying support."

"I know." Adam growled as he stared at the haze over the horizon through the window. And he wouldn't be surprised if Brian tried to find a way to make Dani's life miserable. He might have to punch that guy out. It would be worth it, even the press storm Brian would raise afterwards would be worth it. Or... wait. There had to be a better way to solve the problem, one that wouldn't involve the press. Surely this was why lawyers were invented. And checkbooks. He made a low noise in his throat. 

"You're scaring me. Have some ice cream and be the Adam I know," Kris urged, grabbing for some pints and balancing them precariously as he walked to the theater room. "The sweetie, not the scary guy." 

"I'm not your father, but fine. You realize you will be required to help me work off those ice cream calories?" Adam asked, following Kris with spoons and dvds. "After Dani goes to sleep."

"Hmm." Kris stacked Dani's dvds on the end of the table. Adam really should be punished for scaring him half to death with that phone call. "I guess on my errands, I should've picked up a cock ring for you. And only after you'd thrust enough times to work off those calories would I let you come." 

Adam froze in surprise at the idea of Kris in a sex shop, then laughed. "Cock ring? You? Buying a cock ring? I'd pay serious money to see you in a sex shop." 

"Shut up. I'm... sophisticated these days." Kris glared at Adam, hoping he hid his own amusement. Adam was right -- he couldn't imagine himself going into a sex shop alone and buying a toy. Especially since the clerk might recognize him and then blab about Adam Lambert's cock size. Which was no one's business but his, he thought decisively and rubbed his hand over his hair in agitation. 

Rolling his eyes, Adam smiled. "I love you just the way you are, Hedgehog." 

"Oh..." Kris shrugged and hugged Adam again. "And you'll never throw me out, right?"

"Never," Adam said softly while holding Kris tightly, knowing he was hearing Kris' deepest fears. Tonight, however, was Dani's turn to be fearful and comforted by friends. "But I will push you towards the freezer right now to get my mint chocolate ice cream I saw in the back."

"I'm just an ice cream pimp for you."

"I'll pump you with ice cream later."

"Wouldn't that make my dick go limp?" Kris asked.

"Not if the ice cream is in my mouth." 

"Ohhhh!" Kris grinned. "Good thing I got the smooth creamy kinda ice cream." 

"Did you have enough money?" Adam asked. "Because--"

"No. I sold sexual favors to buy the extra pint of mint chocolate." Kris glared at Adam. "I can afford ice cream. And a cock ring." How much did a cock ring cost, anyway?

"Not if it's the kind I like." 

"Let me guess. With rhinestones... " Kris paused. "Wait. No way. That would hurt." 

"Think about that while you're being the hunter-gatherer and putting food on the table. Shoo!" Adam grinned and slapped Kris on his butt. "I have some phone calls to make." 

 

"There." Kris smiled in satisfaction as he led Dani toward the huge table in the theater room and pointed towards the piles of food. "Ice cream, of course. Chips -- the baked kind. Rice cakes, which I think are nasty but maybe they'll calm your stomach? And fruit. The fruit is healthy and can go on the ice cream and -- Wait. Why was Adam carrying on about grapefruit?" 

Dani sighed. "Apparently, grapefruit can interfere with the pill. And if you're on a grapefruit diet... it basically kills the pill. At least in some people. I'm apparently one of those people. Apparently." 

"No shit?" Kris frowned. "Didn't know that."

"Why would you? It's not like you're going to get a woman pregnant." Dani shrugged as she desultorily picked through her movies and randomly selected one for the player. "But the thing is, that I didn't either. Obviously. Lane did. She had a friend who got pregnant the same way -- she told me that the night of Adam's birthday party, but it was... too late." 

"Does Lane know?" Kris gestured in the general direction of Dani's stomach as he watched her set up the dvd.

"No. I... told Brian first, then I told my parents -- that's where I was last weekend when you were at the club, that's why I couldn't go. And then Adam." Dani fell silent, then sighed. She looked down at her hand which Kris was holding in his, lightly stroking her palm. "You're a good man, Kris Allen. I'm really glad you wandered into Starbucks that day and asked the boy out."

"Me too..." Kris reached out and grabbed a spoon and shoved it at Dani. "Dig in. Adam had to make some phone calls, but he'll be here in a second, so if you want that mint ice cream, grab it now." 

"Hey, who took the mint ice cream?" Adam complained moments later as he stood over the table, hands on his hips. He'd left a message for his lawyer and talked to his mom, so that step was done. 

"The mama. She wins." Kris smirked.

"She'll share." Adam flung himself down on the oversize lounger on the other side of Dani and grabbed the pint carton from her. "Let's watch your Hugh Grant movies. You love him."

"You don't. You're the best friend ever..." Danielle sniffed and took back the ice cream. 

"I bought that ice cream," Kris reminded them.

"Well, you're definitely the best boyfriend of my best friend ever." Danielle wiped at her eyes. "But you don't have to stay and listen to me wallow. That's above and beyond boyfriend of best friend duty."

"Hey." Kris pointed his spoon at Dani. "We're all in this together. We're the... three ice creamateers." 

"We should totally make a home-movie of that," Adam suggested. "I can come up with a plot and Kris can write some songs and--"

"We should!" Dani agreed. Her energy suddenly subsided and she sighed, resting her head on Adam's shoulder. The week she had spent with the boys on the tour bus last summer had been so much fun, but she had especially loved the down time spent making silly videos. But... She yawned. Some other time. 

Adam pointed the remote at the tv. "But right now, Music and Lyrics is starting. Your favorite. So no wallowing." He leaned over and winked at Kris, who rolled his eyes. They both knew what was coming. 

"No wallowing indeed!" Dani agreed, resolutely refusing to cry again. "You two know the drill! Get up and act out Pop Goes My Heart for me!"

Groaning in unison, but knowing how much Dani laughed when they did her favorite scene from her favorite Hugh Grant movie, the two men jumped up. 

Dani laughed as they overacted, although how one could overact beyond that video, she didn't know. She felt herself relaxing into the chaise and then held out her hands as the opening video ended. They sat back down and ate their way through the movies, eventually changing into night clothes before starting Notting Hill. Dani elbowed Kris as they waited for Adam to critique it. 

Adam grimaced. Why Dani liked this movie was an utter mystery to him. "Notting Hill would've been better with some different direction or writing. That ending at the press conference where she's just staring at him without saying a word? Forevvvver. It's weird. I always wonder why the reporters aren't asking if she's had a stroke."

"I know." Dani nodded as she nibbled on a rice cake. 

"She looks like Bambi's mother before she got shot." Adam leaned forward and imitated the frozen smile Julia Roberts affected.

"Stop it." Kris giggled as he put down his bottle of beer. "I like some parts of this movie."

"You do?" Adam asked incredulously. "C'mon. It's terrible."

"Hey!" Dani bristled. "Do I complain when you make me watch that Velvet Goldmine movie for the millionth time?"

"Yes." Adam raised an eyebrow.

"Oh." Dani shrugged. Why couldn't Adam forget anything? She turned back to Kris. "So what about this movie do you like?"

"I like the scene where she comes to Hugh Grant in the book store and kinda pleads her case. I mean, I know she really doesn't sell it and they're both way too old to refer to each other as boy and girl, but the potential was there, ya know? The writing was good, just needed a different interpretation."

"Kinda like if all we'd ever heard of Bohemian Rhapsody was Constantine Maroulis' version?" Dani teased, knowing the boys would grunt in disgust. 

"Ugh!" Adam and Kris groaned at the same time. 

"So, Mr. Ac. Tor..." Adam teased, willing to do whatever it took to keep Dani smiling as she was right now. "How would you have sold that line?"

"Yeah!" Dani clapped her hands. "Act it out. Adam can play the Hugh Grant role and you can be Julia Roberts." 

"I... can't. I can't act!" Kris protested.

"Neither can Julia Roberts," Adam retorted drily. "So you can't do worse. And besides in Conway, you acted like you were straight, whatever the hell that means--" 

"Wearing plaid, not shaving and having your baseball cap on backwards?" Dani teased, then laughed when Kris glared at her. Adam was right. Kris was cute when he got all aggravated. 

"Hey, apparently that worked," Adam pointed out. "Only Cale seems to have had a clue."

"Even though you think I was acting back in Conway, I really don't know how." Kris dragged it out, knowing how much Adam and Dani liked ganging up on him.

"C'mon, try..." Dani coaxed. 

"Do it for Dani," Adam added. "You don't want to be responsible for making her cry, do you?"

"Yeah..." Dani sniffled. Hey, this propensity for tearing up might prove useful. She batted her eyes quickly and was able to brush away several tears.

"Ohmigod, stop!" Kris groaned. "Okay, okay. You two aren't gonna give up, are you?"

"I'm implacable," Adam said with satisfaction while giving Dani a high five. 

"And I'm irresistible." Dani smiled.

"You're both impossible." Kris sighed and reached over Dani to shove Adam's leg. "Okay, sweetie. You've acted and lord knows you love to instruct people, so here's my gift to you for today -- you can instruct me. That should make your day. Tell me what to do."

"Okaaay! First, let's start by throwing out all your plaid shirts because really, that makes me doubt your orientation, which brings to mind the question of our notions of gender and--"

"I meant..." Kris interrupted, then drawled slowly to reset the discussion because he could totally see Adam launching into some digression about cultural signifiers or whatever you called it, whatever it was that put him to sleep in seconds. "How should I act this line?"

"Damn!" Adam snapped his fingers. "I though this was my chance, finally...." He sighed loudly, relieved when he heard Dani giggle. "Well, there are two schools of thought on acting..." Adam began.

"Here we go...the dissertation," Dani muttered and hid a grin behind a rice cake when Kris elbowed her. She tuned Adam out to watch her movie. 

Finishing up a lengthy explanation likening facial expressiveness to vocal technique which was way better than watching the movie, Adam nodded. "That's technical or British-style acting. Or you can do it the quick and dirty way and just imagine you -- yourself -- are in that situation and tap into those emotions, thereby letting them do the work for you." 

Kris' mouth dropped open. "You mean you coulda just told me to imagine myself as the character?"

"Of course. But then we would've had to watch more of this movie." Adam grinned when Dani threw a piece of popcorn at him and he caught it in his mouth.

Kris groaned, then looked down at his hands, imagining himself to be in the same position as Julia Roberts' character, trying to convince a skeptical man that, despite evidence to the contrary, that his love was real. Okay, no problem, he could do it... But no. "I can't. That line is too hard to do right. So you do it and I'll do the Hugh Grant stuff. That makes more sense since you're the famous one, the Julia Roberts character. I can totally imagine myself being astonished that someone as famous as you would be in love with me. Ya know, been there, done that. That I could do. The other? Not so much."

Adam held up his hand. "Hold on. You were the one defending that scene by saying it just needed a better line reading and now _I'm_ the one supposed to deliver that line reading?"

"Each according to their strengths, right?" Kris shrugged and shoved a handful of Doritos in his mouth and chewed slowly while waiting for Adam to give in. 

"But--" Adam began.

"Oh stop it!" Dani threw up her hands. "I'll have this baby before you two finish one of your little games. Just do it, Adam. Prove Kris right and be all irresistible. I mean, it's not like you can screw up with Kris. Sometimes I think you could vomit on him and he'd find it adorable."

"Uh, not so much..." Kris rolled his eyes. "Limits, Dani, limits." 

"But that's exactly what that scene is about proving wrong," Adam argued. "Or rather, it's proving that self-imposed limits ruin our happiness." 

"Oh? See, I didn't get that. That's why you should deliver that closing line." Kris grinned smugly and popped a piece of popcorn in his mouth.

"Oooh, snap." Dani laughed. She already knew her memories of this night were not going to be of crying and wallowing. "Gotcha, babe. Now, just do it, already." 

"Fine." Adam grabbed the ice cream back and dug in. "Give me a moment to think about it."

"He's gonna re-write that line," Dani told Kris. "Can't ever just leave anything alone."

"Everything can be perfected." Adam slowly licked the spoon while staring at Kris' mouth. "I was just saying that to Kris the other morning in the shower..."

Blushing heatedly, Kris groaned. "Let's not talk about your plans for shower design... Well, let's not."

"Fine. Start the scene. Open with the monologue and then I'll cut to the line. I think they went on too long talking." Adam nodded, then pointed his spoon at Dani. "Don't say that it must be bad if _I'm_ suggesting cutting dialogue." 

"I'm suggesting we get started," Dani retorted. "Again, before this baby is born." 

Kris sat up straight and nodded. "Okay, I got this. Here goes..." He took a breath and waited for Adam to nod, then began. "'The thing is, with you I'm in real danger. It seems like a perfect situation, apart from that foul temper of yours. But my relatively inexperienced heart would I fear not recover if I was once again cast aside as I would absolutely expect to be...'" He trailed off as Adam looked away, then back, fear in his eyes, replaced by determination even as his hand came up and tilted Kris' chin up. 

"What if you're wrong? What if the problem is how you see me, how you see us? Think about it. What if... I'm just a man... standing in front of a man, asking him to love me? What then?" Adam looked at Kris, putting everything he felt into his eyes.

"What... th...th...then?" Kris stammered, reaching out to touch Adam's cheek, before stroking the bottom curve of his lip. "This..." He slid his hand around the back of Adam's neck and hauled him close, over Dani's legs, for a deep kiss.

"Okay!" Dani shrieked. "And that would have meant no funny chase scene. And...Wait." Dani shoved her arms between the men and pushed them apart. "Enough. How did you know that piece of dialogue, anyway, Kris?" She asked, "That's quite a mouthful. All those clauses and pauses... that's why Hugh's the best. He can deliver impossible lines like that."

"Uh..." Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh... I hate to say this, but..."

"Go ahead." Dani stared hard at Kris. When he looked away, she turned back to Adam. "What is it?"

"He's trying to avoid saying that we've watched Hugh Grant every time you and Brian broke up. Which was..." Adam held Dani's hand. "Many times. So as much as I hate this damn movie, I too have memorized whole sections of it." 

"Too many times..." Dani whispered. "Too many times." She shook her head. "Time to move on. What's next?" 

"Four Weddings and a Funeral. Perfect." Adam grinned. "I'm going to enjoy imagining Brian's funeral." 

"Me too..." Dani said softly. She wanted this baby, but Brian... She bit her lip. When she'd left him, he'd looked both thoughtful and smug. Bad combo. Was he going to let her move on? 

 

Lane looked up from her phone as Kris sat down next to her outside the studio as they waited for Adam to finish recording. "I wouldn't ask this of Adam or Dani, but... Do you think Brian was ever in love with Dani or..."

"Or was she a way to find a way to fame or fortune, through her connection to Adam?" Kris put down his guitar and looked down at his hands. "You know, some people probably think that of me, don't they? Tell me, you read the blogs and shit."

"First of all, why do you care what strangers with bad attitudes think? Second of all, what dolts would think that? You do everything to _avoid_ fame and fortune. And success. Including Adam's offers of help." Lane stared at Kris. "I've never understood it. But...now I wonder. Is it so that people don't think you're sleeping your way to the top?"

"Maybe I'm just lazy." Kris shrugged. "Compared to Adam--"

"Don't compare yourself to that workaholic. How in the world he's going to fit in being a father... I don't know." Lane shook her head. "He'll undoubtedly figure it out. He always does. Or we yell at him until he does. But don't distract me. Are you sabotaging yourself?"

"No." Kris shook his head. "I'm just not sure of what I want to do with my music. I'm still trying to figure it out. And believe me, it's not for Adam's lack of effort in quote unquote trying to help me out." He grinned.

Lane laughed, "Help you out being a euphemism for bugging you incessantly, asking endless questions and then saying, 'Well, it's up to you, of course! I don't want to be bossy!'"

Pointing his index finger at Lane, Kris nodded. "You got it. So far I know this -- I enjoy playing the gig at the club every other week. But I don't have any burning desire to do that five nights out of ten, the way Adam does. You know, the way he's _driven_ about performing?"

Lane raised her hands and then fluttered them to her knees, saying, "You mean how he wilts like a wittle snowdrop in the sun when he's not performing?"

"I am so gonna tell him you called him a wilting snowdrop!" Kris chortled. "No guy likes to be called wilting."

"Oh that bloody male ego." Lane rolled her eyes. "Pride is one of the deadly sins, you know."

"Yeah, may have heard that," Kris said drily. "But the only sin that really matters is treating others poorly."

"You're probably right," Lane agreed. "But how about how you treat yourself? Don't you have an obligation to your own skills and talents and needs?"

"If we're still talking about performing, like I said, I don't think I'm like Adam. He just... glows when he performs. I can love it, but it doesn't feed me the way it feeds him. That's not me... I almost think I like the writing of music better, the process of it?"

Lane nodded. "Well, it's true that you spend approximately ten more time writing music and tinkering with what you've written, then performing or even seeking out performance opportunities. Maybe songwriting with the occasional gig is what you want to do."

"Darlin', that's what I'm _doing_ ," Kris pointed out with a wry twist to his mouth. He laughed as Lane's mouth formed a perfect "O" of realization. "I'm trying out that path right now. And it's working for me right now. Although I gotta admit it's working in part because my boyfriend makes a lot of money. So I need to find a way to sell my music so it gets heard. Well, no 'just' about it -- that's a hard road. One I admit I need to step out on. And..." He shrugged and fiddled with the tuning of his guitar. "Maybe work with kids again. But really, don't worry about me -- I'm happy doing what I'm doing."

"Fair enough, as you Yanks say." Lane looked down at Adam's schedule and smiled. "As long as you're not sabotaging yourself either to avoid media attention or to avoid negativity. You can't live your life worried about what others think. As Adam would say so succinctly -- fuck 'em."

"Yeah, I'm with Adam Fucking Lambert. I know all about ignoring the haters." Kris nodded, then hit a loud and discordant note on his guitar. As they both laughed, he added, "Speaking of hating: Brian. So did he love Dani or was it a ploy or was it just his good luck that he liked a girl who was friends with Adam Lambert?"

"Hmm. Good question. Maybe he really did like her, but the temptation of Adam's fame and fortune and connections was too much for his feeble morals to resist."

"Maybe. It happens, even with people who aren't famous. They latch onto someone for the advantage." 

"Yeah. I remember back in school, how desperate people were to be friends with the best football player--"

"You mean soccer." Kris smirked.

"I mean football, you redneck." Lane rolled her eyes. "But you must have known people like that even back in Green Acres."

"Yup. My parents knew a guy who married the daughter of a man with the area's best hunting land, just so he could have access to it and hopefully, one day, inherit it." Kris shrugged. "People aren't that different. No matter where you go there you are surrounded by people with no morals or conscience."

Lane's head snapped to look at Kris. Maybe Adam was right about Kris having worse trust issues than he did. 

 

 

"What is it?" Kris asked Leila as he walked out through the patio doors and saw Adam furiously churning through the water while Leila watched him with obvious anxiety. The three of them were supposed to be meeting here to go to lunch and a movie before Kris had to go to work. 

"I don't know..." Leila responded. "He's been in there for half an hour. He got off the phone, yelled incomprehensibly and possibly in several foreign languages, got back on the phone to his lawyer--"

"Excuse me, ma'am. His lawyer?"

"I've told you not to call me ma'am. Call me Leila or even mom, okay?"

"Okay..."Kris flushed with pleasure.

"Yes, his lawyer in that low voice..." Leila shook her head. Adam only used that low cutting tone when he was at the end of his rope and was trying to remember how to tie a knot to hold on. But what was it that had him so angry? "Then he finished that conversation. When I asked what was wrong, he shook his head, held up his hand, then swore again, ripped off everything but his underwear, jumped in the pool and has been beating that water to death ever since."

"Bad news on the phone..." Kris put his hand over his heart, feeling it pound against his fingertips. "But he didn't tell you anything?"

"No. He just... " Leila shook her head. "I honestly haven't seen him that angry since the dick pic." 

Nodding slowly, Kris contemplated his choices. "I... could just dive in there..." He started forward. 

Leila quickly grabbed Kri's arm. "I wouldn't. He might not see you until too late and plow into you. You could be hurt and he'd feel guilty. Bad combination."

"Good point..." Kris agreed as he watched Adam spin around at the end of the pool and return. "I know!" He grabbed a pool ball and after a moment of watching Adam's rate of speed, launched it at Adam's head. 

"What the f---" Adam exclaimed as he stopped and turned around. Squinting into the sun, he held his hand over his eyes. "What's going on?"

"Get out of the pool and tell us what's going on, if you please," Leila ordered. "You've been in there long enough. I mean it, young man. Out!"

"Yes, Mom." Adam shoved his hair out of his face and climbed out of the pool, grabbing a towel from the cabinet on the patio. He buried his face in the soft, white terry and took a deep breath. Then another. In his entire life, he had only been this angry a few times, the knd of anger mixed with the frustration of being governed by others. Especially. "Brian. It's Brian. Brian contacted me."

"You?" Leila asked. "Not Danielle?"

"No." Adam touched his chest. "Me. Because I'm the money pot."

"Oh my god..." Leila and Kris said in unison. 

Leila clenched her fists. Poor Dani. And poor Adam, to have his worst fears about human nature confirmed when he finally seemed to have gotten past his own bad luck. 

"What did he want money for?" Kris asked.

"To not make Dani's life hell, basically. Oh he was too clever to say that, of course. Just talk about how he intends to sue for full custody which means proving Dani is unfit. He doesn't have a chance, but he can make her life hell."

"So he wants money to go away?" Leila asked. Oh crap, she knew so many people who had gone through utter hell over custody battles. Adam was right to be furious and no doubt, scared on Dani's behalf.

"Yes. He's willing to sign away all of his paternal rights." Adam rubbed at his skin furiously. "And if I want to add a bonus, he'll also be happy to have someone else's name on the birth certificate. Apparently you can do that in the state of California. Gays and lesbians can't get married, but you can legally falsify a birth certificate. They call it something else, but that's what it is. Isn't that just... splendid! And if I pay him enough, he'll give up his name and disappear. If I don't... well, the implication is that he'll make Dani's life hell." 

"I can't believe him!" Kris yelled. 

"Me either... " Leila shook her head. "At least it's better to know now, though, right from the beginning and possibly nip the poison in the bud."

"That's what I think too, that's why I called the lawyer to get the paperwork going before he changes his mind, but... "Adam slamdunked his towel into the rolling cart with a loud thump. "Damn, damn, damn!"

"Maybe this is a blessing in disguise," Leila suggested. "He's clearly not a good person, unworthy of Dani and the baby. If there is way to get rid of him permanently with nothing more than the expenditure of money..."

Adam sat down hard on a chair and buried his face in his hands. "I know. I just..."

"God, I want to punch him in the nose, kick his ass!" Kris continued, then kicked the ball across the back patio. "That's why you were in the pool."

"Yeah, I was trying to work off my anger before I punched a hole in the wall..." Adam trailed off as he watched Kris stomp around the patio. 

"Good god, I want to be a father and here he is, throwing away his chance! Selling it..." Kris grumbled as he stormed around the pool to grab for the ball.

"I didn't know Kris was _so_ interested in having a family," Leila began.

"He is. He has it all planned out -- three kids, the whole thing. _Some_ day, he said, although he was so excited about Dani having a baby...." Adam shrugged. "But I guess... _some_ day might be _now,_ right?"

"Well, the astrologist at your party did say this year was going to be full of changes, right?"

"Makes me wonder what else might happen?" Adam looked up at his mother. "Good gods, I have an EP to finish, a tour to plan and execute... What else?"

"Shhh..." Leila put her finger over her lips. "Don't say that too loudly!"

 

"Cale Mills, when are you going to give me my son's phone number?" Kim Allen demanded, glaring at her own reflection as she stomped back and forth in her kitchen in front of her patio door.


	39. The minor fall, the major lift, the baffled...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks
> 
> Note: The title comes from Leonard Cohen's song, Hallelujah.

**Chapter 39: The minor fall, the major lift, the baffled...  
**

"You let them do _what_?"

"Hey -- it wasn't a matter of _letting_ them do it! Like I could stop them."

"You're right. Stubborn, the two of them."

"And besides, if you couldn't whup that out of them in eighteen years or so, how would you expect me to handle it in the fifteen minutes of warning I got?" Kris asked.

"You can't change a child's essential nature," Eber said. "Believe me, parenthood teaches that lesson."

"Yeah, not a lesson my father ever learned." Kris sighed. "Whatever. They're going to be fine. "

"I'm going to end up having to bail one of them out of jail and visit the other in the hospital."

"It's not gonna be that bad. They're both working on behaving like grown ups...." Kris paused. In his opinion, Adam was being too grown up lately. Guy needed to cut loose, punch something, have a party...

"Ha. Kris..." Eber shook his head as he spoke into the phone. "I don't think the two of them have ever spent more than an hour in each other's company without verbally or physically attacking each other."

"It's gonna be fine. I know it. No bloodshed." 

 

"I punched him in the face." Neil nodded and grinned with smug satisfaction. 

"You... did what?" 

"You heard me. I punched him in the face. Hard. I may have broken his nose."

"No way!"

"Way!"

"We are not doing Wayne's World--"

"Why not, we're on a road trip."

"Good point. 

"Party time!"

"Excellent!"

Adam and Neil fist-pumped each other, then paused, both realizing how odd it was to actually enjoy each other's company. Neil looked away first, still shocked that when he let down his guard that he and Adam got along so well. Okay, Adam's optimism still got on his nerves, but still. Weird. He guessed his parents had been right all those years when they'd told the brothers that they could get along.

Adam smirked. They could get along, but that didn't mean he couldn't needle his brother. "See, we can get along. I knew it."

"You are so fucking annoying!" Neil groused. "You and your cock-eyed optimism."

"Well, it's true that my cock is optimistic. Every morning it opens its eye and wakes up thinking it's gonna get some."

Neil laughed. "I bet it does with the way Kris looks at you."

"He's so hot." Adam grinned as he remembered the way Kris had woken him up that very morning. And then the look in Kris' eyes when he had kissed him afterward...

"Ugh, stop it with that sappy look on your face." Neil rolled his eyes. "I'm going to vomit." He mimed gagging, then paused. "I wish I had hit Brian harder -- you know, enough to make him vomit."

"So you punched him in the nose? _Really_?"

"Why don't you believe me?"

"You punched Brian in the face and I didn't get a call asking to bail you out of jail or hire a lawyer to defend you in a civil suit?" 

Neil frowned as he looked down at his hand. Adam loved to solve problems, but even he must get tired of being the go-to guy on occasion. And Adam had problems -- who helped him solve them? Would he even let anyone help? That must be why Kris was doing his thing on the sly. Plus Adam could have a little trust in his own brother. "Ye of little faith. I figured out how to do it."

When Neil said nothing more, but instead sat there looking first thoughtful, then smug, Adam sighed. "And are you planning to elucidate --"

"Oooh, Elucidate. I like that word. Makes me shiver."

"I figured it would. It's probably the closest thing to an orgasm you've had in the last six months."

" _Very_ funny."

"And also true."

"Mind your own beeswax." Neil sighed loudly. "Do you want to hear my story about how I upheld the family honor? Dani being part of our family, of course."

"I'm dying to know. Just dying."

"I know you are. So I did some poking around and was unsuccessful--"

"Like I said, no orgasms for you for months."

"My god! Does everything revolve around sex?"

Adam and Neil looked at each other and laughed. "Pretty much!" They said in unison. 

Neil smiled and looked out the windshield as Adam drove down the highway to San Diego. He'd actually always enjoyed hanging out with Adam and now that he'd stopped trying to be one-up his big brother with derisive commentary, Adam seemed to enjoy his company too. Even if his brother couldn't have a focused non-work conversation to save his life. 

"I'm waiting." Adam poked Neil in the leg. "Spill the story of your plan. I hope it was fool-proof and not proof of foolishness." 

"God, you're an old fart now that you've over thirty." Neil smirked when Adam groaned. "So I found out from some guy at Kris' bar where Brian hangs out -- some other dive bar. Of which Kris' entourage member was fairly contemptuous, because apparently in dive bar world there's some hierarchy. Amazing, isn't it -- how humans feel this need to have hierarchies no matter what?"

Adam shook his head in disagreement. "I don't think it's inherent."

"I do. I think there's a deep-seated human need to feel superior to someone. Hence why poor free whites in the pre-Civil War south supported slavery."

"Well and racism---"

"Which is just another way to feel better than someone else." 

"I'd feel better if you'd tell me about this punch that's not going to require a call to my lawyer." 

"Chill, dude. I've got it covered. I found out what bar he frequents and I went out there with some of my friends as back up--"

"As you, Neil Lambert? Or did you disguise yourself?"

"Of course! I grew a goatee and unlike you, don't look like a gay pirate when I do so." Neil laughed as Adam punched his arm. "Although honestly, I'm not sure he would've recognized me anyway since he was always busy making time with Dani or sucking up to you, but I wasn't taking any chances. I have to admit, it did somewhat lessen the enjoyment of standing over him, with him not knowing who I was."

"Hmm. Priorities, I suppose."

"Exactly. You can't have everything in life, so choose what's important."

"You sound like Dad!" Adam exclaimed in shock.

Neil froze. "Or you. Ugh. We're turning into Dad."

"Well, he was a good dad."

"The best. So it's not a bad thing, with you becoming a dad yourself," Neil pointed out, shocked himself when Adam only nodded thoughtfully. He stared, then looked forward again, nodding. Of course. They were on their way to San Diego, him ostensibly to visit old friends but really wanting to spend some one-on-one time with his brother -- that being hard to come by in LA. And Adam... he'd said openly he wanted to visit their father for some paternal advice. So weird... the idea of his brother being a dad himself. "Speaking of which, the sperm donor." 

"Speaking of which, you went into a bar with _friends._ So you said. So I have to ask -- you have friends in LA?"

"Okay. Brad and Tommy."

"Brad walked into a dive bar?" Adam burst out laughing. "That sounds like the beginning of a really bad joke. What was he wearing?"

"He...uh... decided to dress like Kris. I think he may have actually quote unquote borrowed one of Kris' plaid shirts, to be honest."

"The white one with brown lines?" Adam asked, then laughed. "Kris has been going crazy looking for that damn shirt. He's going to be so mad. Do you have pictures?"

"Well, actually Brad videotaped it. He pretended to be some kind of film student or... well, I don't even know. He talked really fast and looked really innocent. The bartender asked to see his proof of age -- which made him really happy and even more talkative. Everyone just stared at him in bemusement and then shrugged."

"Good plan. Distract and then move in for the kill?"

"Exactly."

"And what was Tommy's role in this grand plan?"

"He seemed to think it was flirting with the rather grubby cocktail waitress. Occasionally alternating with leaning against the bar and smirking at me." 

Adam laughed. "Wait, how was he dressed?"

"If it's not sex, it's clothes?" Neil shook his head. "Can't you ever just let me tell a story my way?"

"My way is better." Adam looked over at Neil with a bland expression. When Neil didn't snatch the bait with impatience and aggravation, he added, "It always is." 

Neil stared back, then nodded. "Yeah, you're trying to get me going. Not gonna work."

"But I neeeeeeeeeeeeeed to picture it," Adam whined. "I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed...."

"Shut the fuck up with the whining. You know what? I cannot wait until you're a father and your kid pulls this crap on you."

"Ugh. It's karma, isn't it?" Adam straightened and nodded. "Go on, tell your story."

"Okay. So Tommy used some kind of, I don't know, hair dye rinse or rather, Brad used it on him."

"Oh hell, I missed all this?"

"You're a busy man and Brian would have recognized you instantly." Neil shrugged. "We wanted to do our part. So Brad dyed Tommy's hair this color I'll call dirt and he wore some metal tee-shirt, raggedy jeans and some shit-kicker boots. A baseball cap. Just like mine."

"Okay, so you guys had an _adventure_! With hair dye and costumes!" Adam realized. He pouted. "And I was left out." 

"Let me have some spotlight for once!" Neil teased. "Besides, bro -- you don't blend in with the crowd. Even with a baseball cap." 

Adam nodded. "So tell me how you did it."

'Well, it started when I found out that Brian's dive bar caters to ex-pats from New York. His family is originally from Brooklyn."

"What?"

"Yeah, he had this whole other life. And that's where his weakness lay." Neil grinned when Adam looked at him quizzically. "And that's where I had some knowledge you didn't."

"You have lots of knowledge I don't," Adam said quickly and honestly. "You're the smartest person I know." 

"And you're the prettiest, so we're even." Neil winked. "So here's what I learned. People tend to gravitate to ex-pat bars around sports. Sports, Adam."

"Oh. I know nothing."

"My god, the world has stopped turning on its axis! My brother admits he knows nothing about something."

"But I know plenty of something about nothing. There's probably a lyric in that..." Adam mused, making a mental note. 

"I.. I don't even... Whatever!" Neil shook his head. "So. Sports. New Yorkers... baseball...? Get it?"

Adam thought, then shook his head. "And I've still got nothing."

"Do you _never_ listen when we go back to visit Mom's family and they're carrying on about baseball?"

"No. I pretend and nod occasionally, but I'm usually thinking about music."

"I knew it!" Neil threw up his hands. "One track mind."

"You just said all I think about is sex and clothes."

"Okay, your puny little brain can also handle a third item. The glorious Adam trilogy of music, sex, and clothes. Not necessarily in that order."

"Can you possibly tell this story in an order? Any order? Focus."

"Arrgggh!" Neil ground his teeth. "So, as I said -- sports. New Yorkers take baseball very seriously. Especially Yankee fans. Of which Brian is one. And in the interests of finishing this story before we hit San Diego--"

"How long is it? We just passed Del Mar!"

"As I said before you rudely interrupted me..." Neil ground his teeth. No one could yank his chain like Adam. "Yankee fans don't like the Mets -- _da bums_ \-- but more than that, more than anything, they loathe and hate with a passion the Red Sox."

Adam nodded. "Got it. New York Yankee fans hate the Red Sox from... Oh, I know. Reading, Pennsylvania. The Reading Red Sox."

"No! Boston."

"But that's not alliterative."

"It doesn't have to be." Neil looked over at his brother and resisted the urge to strangle him. "I'm only not hurting you because you're driving."

"Strategic move on my part. Maybe I do have some brains." Adam shrugged. "So let me guess -- you and Tommy were wearing Red Sox caps?"

"Exactly. And I just kept taunting him, verbally. You know how I do it--" Neil paused when Adam snorted. "So I used all the skills I developed by torturing you over the years on Brian. And you know what?"

"You have a strong skill set at pissing people off to the point where they want to punch you in the mouth?"

"Exactly. So I just kept talking and then Tommy chimed in -- when he could squeeze it in between smirking and flirting and lo and behold, Brian took a swing at me. Which I _allowed_ to clip me on the chin."

"So you could swing back and it was self defense. Except you hit harder."

"Exactly."

"Brilliant." Adam frowned. He was jealous. Damn, what he wouldn't have given to punch that asshole in the face. Blood would have been good to see. "I hope you made him bleed."

"Noses have that tendency. I always told you I was the smart one."

"That's fair. One of has to be smart and one of has to be pretty. And popular. And--"

"Shut up." Neil laughed and flicked the side of Adam's head. 

"WAIT. OMG. Why am I just now hearing about this?"

"I bribed them to keep quiet. I...um... may have promised a huge party at your house." 

"You promised them a party at _my_ house?" 

"Oh get over it. You love to have parties. You're like a glamrock Martha Stewart or something."

"Except for the fact that I can't cook."

"Small details. Sheesh. Big picture, bro. Big picture."

 

 

"What is a parent's first job?" Eber asked softly as he and Adam ate Mexican at a restaurant in the Old town section of San Diego. Adam had asked to talk and that's what they'd been doing for the last two hours, until hunger set in and then Adam kept talking anyway, determined to talk through his anxiety. 

Adam aimlessly rolled the edge of a tortilla between his fingers. Trick question, no doubt. Well, might as well throw it out. "To love the kid?"

"Good answer, but wrong. Your first job as a parent is to protect. That comes first. Protection." Eber waited while Adam nodded. Adam was by nature protective of the people he loved, so this should be easy. 

"Sure. I see. That's why Mom freaked out when she saw that apartment I lived in when I first moved to LA."

"She wasn't the only one." Eber shuddered. "I still occasionally have nightmares about roaches climbing on you in your sleep."

"And what you're saying is that unless we find a way to control Brian, he'll be like those roaches. Coming out of the woodwork..." Adam nodded as he shoved the sour cream toward his father. Too man calories when he wasn't really tasting anything anyway. 

"Based upon everything you and Dani and Neil and Kris and your mother has said about him, yes." Eber paused and took a sip of his margarita. "We all know people who have had exes who made their lives a living hell using kids as the weapon. I'm sure any of them would have happily paid money to get rid of them, to lead a better life."

"I know that." Adam sighed. "I'm being selfish, I guess. I will pay him off, but I hate to do it. It's not the money, I can afford it. It's the principle of the thing. I hate doing it. I won't say that to Dani, but... I'm horrible, aren't I?"

"That's not selfish. That's honest. And who'd leap at the chance to give scum what they want? Nobody. But it's the best solution. We all have to do things we don't like. The test is whether we do them or not." 

"I'll do it, but I feel like I'm losing."

"Just money." Eber held up his hand when Adam shook his head. "No, listen. Really, all you're losing is money and oh. I get it. You're not in control. And you can't make this situation perfect." He patted Adam on the back. "Well, get used to it. Parenthood..." He laughed. "There's precious little control there. And right now? There is no _perfect_ win in this situation. There is no way to get everything you want. So you need to set priorities. Given the situation, what is your highest priority?" Adam already knew the answer and would do it without hesitation, Eber knew. He just needed to vent about it to someone safe. He smiled. It was an honor to be your kid's safe place. 

Adam closed his eyes. "To enable Dani and the baby to be as happy as possible."

"Exactly. Now what is the choice with the greatest likelihood of that being the result?"

"Getting rid of Brian. He really would be one of those assholes who uses the kid as a pawn, uncaring of any damage he does to the child, just to get more money or for the hell of it or to spite Dani. Or me." Adam sighed and rubbed his face. "I know I have to do it. And I'm glad Neil punched him the in face because someone should. I guess I'm just whining that I didn't get to do it."

"Don't really blame you, son. It's okay to whine and vent. It's better than internalizing all of it. That's not healthy." 

Adam nodded, grateful that his father understood. "I know what to do. I'll do it. I'll pay him off, even if it's the wrong thing to do from a principled point of view. I'll do it. I know that sometimes the choice in life is to be right or to be happy."

"That's a lesson I only really learned thanks to being a father," Eber admitted. 

 

"You will not!" Neil Allen ordered his wife, who'd rushed after Cale the minute the church service was over and caught up with him in the parking lot. "You will not contact Kris. He's turned his back on the righteous path and we won't see or talk to him until he turns back. I'd rather we not talk _of_ him at all." 

"You will not tell me that I cannot even speak of my son!" Kim argued, hands on her hips, ignoring the avidly curious stares of the other parishioners making their way to their cars after Sunday services. 

"I don't know why this all started..." Neil began, shaking his head. 

"Because." Kim Allen reached out and held onto Cale's arm when he would have snuck away. "I saw him on the Oscars red carpet! He's still Kris. Just... more so."

"More disgusting! Those jokes were an embarrassment to us and before God."

"He was just joking the way young guys do. He's still our son! I know my son--"

"No, you don't. And neither do I. We know nothing of him. He was able to hide the sinner he was for so many years. Living in my house, eating at my table, sleeping in my bed--"

"Last I knew, Neil Allen, it's my house too and given that I'm the one making the food on that table--"

"Which he ate, while screwing around with men!' Neil glared. "If he'd channeled the energy from that perversity into his music, he coulda been playing at Branson by now!"

"He didn't want to play at Branson!" Cale interjected. "Kris doesn't much like country. Honestly, how can you not know that?" 

Kim glanced at Cale's incredulous face, which mirrored her own feelings. How could Neil not know that? Or care? It wasn't a big deal, no marker of salvation to like country music, so why didn't he know that fact? Did he not know Kris at all? Did he not care about knowing Kris at all? Was it all about making a son in his own image, rather than encouraging him to reflect his own choices and... Oh. 

Clenching his jaw as Neil Allen ranted on in the church parking lot, Cale shoved his fist into his pocket. He would not punch Neil Allen in the nose. He would not. If he ever got his ass in gear to move out to LA, one huge plus was going to be NOT seeing Neil Allen on a daily basis. Even if he wasn't bitching about Kris, he was bitching about something. Guy was not a fucking ray of sunshine, that's for sure. He tuned back in as Neil began to talk about Kris's music. Interesting thing, that. Neil actually did think his son was a talented musician to the point where he had unrealistic ideas of how easy it should've been for Kris to make it big.

"It's really hard to make it in music in the real business," Cale said tightly. "LA isn't Conway. There's a ton of guitar players for every job."

"Which is why getting your ass off of the couch and pounding the pavement is crucial. As we all know, Kris isn't the most motivated person. Which is why we never heard from him after he moved out there -- if he'd really tried, he'd be a big name by now. So he must not've tried."

"He about killed himself when he first moved out there, trying to make it!" Cale defended Kris. "Sometimes you can work your hardest and do your best, but still not make it. Lookit all the high school football heroes who don't even get to start when they get to college -- not everyone can start!"

"No, not everyone can -- that's why you have to be better than everyone else."

"Well, he's already doing better than most, because he's got a gig at a coffee house. He could've actually worked more..." Cale stopped and made a note to shoot himself in the head when he got home. 

Neil sneered. "But let me guess, he turned down the opportunity. Lazy bum."

Frowning, Cale explained, "He wants to find out what he wants. He works hard. He's not sitting on his ass--" 

"I bet he's not," Neil scoffed. "He's using his ass for something else than finding work. Then again, maybe his ass is his work." 

"Okay, that's enough." Cale snapped, slicing his hand through the air abruptly. 

"Yes, it is, Neil Allen," a quavering voice snapped from behind them.

They all stepped back as the ancient woman who'd been high school principal for more years than anyone could remember glared at Neil Allen. 

"Ma'am." Kim nodded and cleared her throat. Not only was Mrs. Phipps the retired high school principal and the current school board president, more importantly, she was head of the women's guild at church, which meant she was the most powerful woman Kim knew in town. "How are you doing today?"

"Miz Phipps..." Cale smiled. He'd always liked the old lady. She had a dry sense of humor. 

"Kim. Cale." Mrs. Phipps turned, keeping one hand on her cane and the other on her over-sized purse. "Neil, don't make me hit you with my purse. It would feel good, so I'd like to withstand that temptation. Then again, at my age, I don't know why I should resist temptation any more." She paused and stared at Cale as he choked back his snickers. 

"Sorry, ma'am." Cale nodded and ducked his head to hide his smile. 

"You're fine, Cale." Mrs. Phipps shoved her purse at Neil's stomach and smiled as he winced. "I've lived longer than you have, long enough to say lots of changes happening. But what doesn't change and why I give the same commencement address every year, is human nature and human needs. In case you've forgotten, Neil Allen, I'll remind you what I said at your high school graduation and at each of your sons -- yes, Kris is still your son. The most important advice I can give any of you, no matter what the decade, is that happiness is not over-rated. You think about what it takes to be happy and do it."

 

"Having a good time?" Brad asked, pausing his dancing to pull Adam away from the portable dvd player on which the footage of Neil popping Brian was playing. Dani had told him to keep Adam circulating tonight as he was still being "broody", whatever that meant. He thought Adam was just thinking through the huge change coming up. Or his EP. Or his tour. Guy did have a lot on his mind.

"Yeah, actually. I could watch this a hundred times and still find it funny. But you'd better give that shirt back to Kris or he's likely to pop you one," Adam warned.

"I know!" Brad tsked. "I didn't know it was his favorite. Don't worry, it's safely back in the closet, ironed, even, possibly for the first time in its misbegotten life. By the way. Did you know the boy has a wide assortment of edible glitter in there?"

"I might." Adam rolled his eyes, then glared. "And why were you snooping?"

"Ha. It's hardly snooping when it's laying right on top of the dresser." Brad tapped Adam's arm. "Y'all are going to have to be more careful with the toys when you have little munchkins around the house." 

"You mean like locking valuables away from snoops like you? I swear, Kris will put a lock on his closet now. To protect _plaid!_ "

"Be serious. How often would I want to dress like that?" Brad shuddered. "Hey, you're not gonna dress like some old fart from Palm Springs now that you're gonna be a dad, are you?"

"My turn to shudder." Adam shook his head as he caught Kris as he danced by and pulled him close. 

"I always knew..." Brad smiled as Kris snuggled into Adam's chest, pulled his tee-shirt aside and began kissing Adam's collarbone. Kris must've had a few beers. And watching Adam pull Kris even closer to kiss his head, Brad thought Kris was probably better at distracting Adam than anyone else. "That's one reason why Kris is a better match for you than I was."

"You always knew I would what?" Adam questioned.

"Why am I a better match?" Kris looked up from where he'd been kissing Adam's neck. 

"Because you want to be a father, the way Adam should be." Pointing at Adam, Brad added, "I knew you'd be a dad and a good one too. You weren't thinking about it back in the day, but it's in you. Here." Brad touched Adam's chest, laughing as Kris immediately brushed his hand away. "I always knew you'd be fulfilled with three things."

"Finally, he tells!" Kris interjected as Neil, Lee Cherry and Monte walked up. "I've been waiting two years to hear this answer."

"Let me guess. Sex, fashion and music?" Neil guessed.

"Nope."

"Hmm.." Monte stroked his beard. "I'd say, music, sex and ice cream."

"Oh." Brad frowned. "I forgot about the ice cream. Ice cream is huge with Adam--"

"If you don't tell me, I'm gonna hold you down inside a vat of ice cream," Kris warned, hurrying to speak before Adam could make a derogatory remark about himself becoming huge thanks to ice cream. 

"How about sex, music and flaming headdresses?" Lee teased. 

"One of these days, I'm getting my flaming headdress!" Adam announced. 

"No, you're _not_!" The other men exclaimed.

Kris shook his head. "Then again, Brad could test out the prototype. In fact, I'll hold his head nice and tight while you strap that sucker on." 

"Are we still talking about headdresses?" Brad winked. 

Grinning, Kris retorted, "You tell me -- do you need to strap on something? Is what God gave you not good enough? I knew it! Ha!" 

Laughing, Adam hugged both Kris and Brad. "Thanks. I needed that. Good idea to have this party." 

"You work too hard. Balance, my friend." Monte slapped Adam on the back. "You need to spend more time with your people here." He gestured around the large back yard, full of the people Adam had gathered into his own family.

"You're right. I've been trying to find all the answers myself."

Neil poked Adam's arm. "When you have so many of us willing to give you a--" 

"Hard time?" Adam punched his brother's arm.

"But sweetie..." Kris pulled Adam back over to the table under the patio overhang, where everyone else had gathered. "You're not in this alone, not any of it. And we're gonna show you."

"I don't understand..." Adam said honestly as Kris pushed him down into one of the chaise lounges and then promptly sat on his lap and thank all the gods, wiggled. "Wellll... I understand that." He grinned and wrapped one arm around Kris and held him close, kissing his neck. 

"Later!" Dani laughed as she stood up and handed Adam an envelope.

"What's this?" Adam asked curiously as he opened the envelope. Seeing a cashier's check, he frowned in confusion. "What is this about?"

"We're in this together," Kris began to explain. "We didn't want you to do this alone."

"And besides." Dani bit her lip, then continued. "It was my stupid mistake, my stupid choice to be with Brian that got us into this mess. I couldn't let you make the payment all on your own and I...." She took a deep breath and willed herself not to cry. 

Alisan squeezed Dani's hand and picked up the story. "So Kris suggested that we all make a contribution. We know it's not a lot, but it is from all of us, so you know -- both you and Dani -- that we--"

"This family we've made," Scarlett interjected. "We're all in this together. We're standing together." 

"I... I'm actually speechless," Adam admitted, staring in shock at the envelope. It wasn't necessary and he opened his mouth to refuse the check but caught his mother's warning glance. Oh. Better not. But still, he didn't need the money, it wasn't about money.. He looked up at the crowd of people around the patio ranging from old friends to newer ones from Dani's parents to his own parents to Geoffrey and his second wife that he'd bet would soon be his wife again to Lane and Kris. Everyone he loved most was right here and they were showing their commitment to their ersatz family.

"I was wrong before!" Brad announced. "Now the world has stopped spinning on its axis."

"Shaddup!" Kris tossed a balled-up napkin at Brad. "I meant that in a nice way, of course."

"Of course," everyone echoed.

"I..." Adam held up his hand. "Thank you. It's not necessary, but I deeply appreciate the thought and concern. I guess I need reminders from time to time that I don't have to control everything or solve every problem on my own."

"Being a father will teach that lesson like no other," Monte pointed out. "Believe me, you can't do that on your own."  
"Thanks. I'll learn a lot of lessons, I suppose. Damn, I don't want to screw it up," Adam admitted.

"We all screw it up," Lee told him. "But truthfully, it's the people who worry about being a good parent who are good parents. The folks who don't care and assume they're great are the ones who really screw up." 

"And don't worry!" Neil called out. "We all will tell you if you screw up. Believe me, I've been waiting for that moment for years! I'll be totally helpful."

"So we can count on you all to help with projectile vomit?" Dani asked with a grin.

"Projectile..." Adam gulped. 

"Vomit?" Neil gulped. "No, no. I'm sure you two and Kris -- perfect Kris -- will handle that perfectly without my help!"  
"I'm not _that_ perfect!" Kris protested. "Nope, not at all!"

_  
"Damn, your ass is perfect...." Adam whispered sleepily as he cupped that ass in his hands while Kris sagged heavily on his chest, Kris' legs sprawled on either side of his hips, panting in the aftermath._

_"I should clean up..." Kris whispered back, turning his head to kiss a string of soft kisses on Adam from one shoulder to another._

_Rubbing his cheek against the top of Kris' head, Adam coaxed, "No, stay a minute. Stay connected a minute longer. Feel like..." Adam sighed and closed his eyes. "Feel like I'm rushing around so much, need..."_

_Kris lifted his head slowly and smiled as Adam's eyes closed, he gave a soft sigh and just like that, was asleep. Slowly and carefully lifting himself, he padded as quietly as he could into the bathroom for a washcloth. Back in the bedroom, he hesitated, then gingerly wiped Adam up, hissing an annoyed breath as Adam's eyes opened._

_"Dani, mom and Lane are coming over..." Adam said, moving automatically to get up._

_"No. Stay. I mean it." Kris pushed back on Adam's chest. "Lane can rearrange your morning a little so you can oh-I-dunno-fucking-sleep?"_

_His lips quirking up in a small smile, Adam blinked up at Kris. "Oooh, bossy Kris."_

_"I know, doesn't happen too often, but when it does?"_

_"I usually get fucked." Adam wiggled his eyebrows._

_Kris cracked up. "Ha. You're so tired, I might actually manage to do it this time without instructions..."_

_"I don't instruct. I_ suggest. _" Adam smirked, then to his own chagrin, broke into a yawn._

_"Well, my bossiness this time..." Kris broke off as Adam slid his hand between his own legs and began -- "Oh, no, stop that!" Kris called out, dropping the cloth to scramble for the covers, pulling them up and over Adam. "None of that! You need to sleep." He held his breath and then exhaled when Adam frowned, then nodded, before closing his eyes._

_"Love you..." Kris whispered as he bent and kissed Adam's soft lips. He rushed back into the bathroom, hurrying through his shower and dressing, before checking Adam one last time before descending down the stairs just as he heard a knock on the door._

_Opening it cautiously, Kris smiled when he saw Dani and pulled her inside. "I'll make some breakfast. C'mon. Is there anything that upsets your tummy?"_

_"Fruit, believe it or not. Adam -- Is he asleep?" Dani asked._

_"I made sure of it." Kris smirked._

_"Tired him out, did ya?" Dani smirked back. "Good for you. Boy is pushing himself too hard."_

_"Tell me about it," Kris began, than cocked his head as he listened. "They're here." He raced to the front door as a second soft knock on the door sounded. "Got it!" He called out softly as he opened the door to Leila and Lane.  
"Good, it's a little chilly out there," Leila commented, shivering as she stepped inside._

_"You southern Californians. This is practically balmy!" Lane teased. As she walked in, she bopped Kris on the nose. "Once again, I did not use my security codes. That incident with the refrigerator is still emblazoned on my mind."_

_"Good lord, that was nearly two years ago!" Kris teased back. "But then again, the glambulge is worth remembering." Lord knew, his ass still remembered. A good kind of ache._

_"Don't need to hear this!" Leila said, teasingly putting her fingers in her ears._

_"Let's go into the kitchen and I'll make breakfast," Kris offered. He pointed up the stairs. "Adam's actually asleep. Thankfully. He didn't get into bed until almost three am, working on the EP."_

_"He's working too hard," Leila worried as they all went into the kitchen._

_Lane nodded. "I agree. And so does Geoffrey. Do I smell bread?"_

_"And I've added to his stress," Dani said softly._

_"It's not you -- we're all excited about the baby," Kris reminded her as he pulled out pans and Leila opened the refrigerator and choose food. "It's Brian."_

_"And I'd wager it's not about Brian being an asshole so much as Adam not being in control." Leila pushed the eggs toward Kris and smiled as she pointed at the breadmaker. "Glad you're using it."_

_"Of course." Kris smiled. He didn't use the breadmaker often since he really wasn't that great of a cook in his opinion and Adam wasn't big on carbs, although how the guy was able to pass up biscuits, he didn't understand, but he did use it whenever Leila came over for a meal. Only polite to use the gifts people gave you. "So Lane, Leila - Dani and I were thinking about giving Adam a gift."_

_"Yeah. I know Adam is upset, but I also know that it's not about the money," Dani began. "But we can't make it -- Brian, go away. Believe me, I've racked my brain trying to think of ways."_

_"We all have," Leila agreed._

_Lane nodded as she sniffed around the breadmaker. "And Adam's lawyers indicated that although we could try and get him on extortion, that would not prevent Brian from trying to assert parental rights in family court later on. Sick and wrong, but true and legal. So the best option is to make him go away."_

_"But I want to do my part in making him go away," Dani asserted. "And our friends, my parents do too. So Kris and I were talking about the idea of giving Adam a, well..." She stopped._

_"Money. Giving Adam money to help get rid of Brian." Kris stopped when he saw the skepticism on Leila's face. "I know, Adam will refuse money, but it's not really the gift of money. It's like when the fire department has a fund-raiser because someone needs help paying medical bills, what the family really remembers is how the community supported them. So we were thinking..." Kris pointed at Dani._

_Dani nodded. "We were thinking of talking to our family-- our big family -- and asking people if they wanted to contribute, even a teeny bit, just so that Adam would feel supported. I just feel like we all have benefited from his generosity and we should--" She froze, then clamped a hand over her mouth and ran for the bathroom._

_Lane called out, "Adam singlehandedly supports quite a few of us in sum or part. It's our turn to return the favor."_

__

"So you joined the three musketeers in working on the problem called Brian..." Adam smiled at Lane and Dani on either side of him as they finished their story, while watching Kris and Brad have an apparent argument about plaid from across the patio. He smiled. "I probably could make myself miserable about you all conspiring behind my back or..."

"You could just be happy about the fact that you have people who love you and Dani who want to help you," Lane suggested briskly.

"You sound like my dad." Adam nodded and took a deep breath. It was all good. He didn't have to solve every problem himself. Surprises could be good things. After all, meeting Kris that day in Starbucks had been a surprise. Dani having a baby had been a surprise. But both were gifts, beautiful gifts.

"Do you want me to take care of that check for you?" Lane asked.

"Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks." Adam smiled and handed the envelope over. "Deposit it in that account, the new one?"  
Adam held Lane's eyes until she nodded her understanding that the money should go into what he called the kid account, the one he intended to put in trust until the kid turned twenty-one. Or considering his bonehead moves at that age, maybe thirty-one. 

"Just so you know, a good bit of that is from Kris," Dani whispered. "I thought you should know---" She stopped abruptly when Tommy pulled her out to the dance floor, laughingly complaining about needing to use the bathroom first.

"How did Kris..." Adam tapped Lane's bag as he looked at her.

"I think he borrowed some money from Geoffrey, but don't tell him I told you. Don't let on you know!" Lane ordered. "Let him have some --"

"Pride." Adam nodded. "He still carries on sometimes about paying half the rent."

"I know." Lane smiled smugly. "He wants to feel like he's making an equal contribution to the household." 

"So...How did you know about this, oh Super Snoop?"

Lane held up her hand. "I wasn't snooping. I inadvertently overheard a conversation. Or Kris' side of it anyway."

_  
""Hey, Geoffrey. I was uh wondering... I know, just spit it out, you're busy. Could you uh advance me some.... Yes, money. Could you advance me... Yes, I'm good for it. You know I'm not goin' anywhere. I found my place, my people, my... Adam. You know it... Oh, for Dani. To get rid of Asshole.... Yeah, good cause... No, you don't have to... I know! I get it. Beggars can't be choosers. Low blow... Oh, sorry. Jumped... Yeah, that's why Adam calls me Hedgehog.... Thanks. I'll uphold my end of it. ... Yeah. thanks."_

"So Geoffrey contributed too?" Adam shook his head. "I don't always understand that guy."

Lane shrugged. "What's to understand? He considers himself not just your manager, but a friend. And he seems to consider Kris somewhat like the son he never had. Tight bonds -- which you seem to want to resist with him. Why is that?"

"My dad always warned me about mixing personal relationships with business at that level." Adam held both hands, palm up. "Let's be honest. If I stop making him money, he'll drop me. It's not wise, therefore, to get emotionally invested."

"Oh, really?" Lane arched an eyebrow. "That's why you went to the trouble of tracking down the famous second wife -- the one who got away -- and talked her into coming to a party and giving Geoffrey a second chance? Because you're keeping it just business between you two?"

"Oooh, snap!" Adam laughed, then sighed happily when Kris' arms encircled his shoulders from behind.

"Hey, sweetie..." Kris trailed his finger down Adam's neck and over his chest, laughing when Adam caught his hand and held onto it tightly. "So Brad paid me rent."

"Rent for what?" Lane asked, smiling as Adam tugged on Kris' hands and pulled him around to sit on his lap.

"Borrowing my shirt." Using his free hand, Kris dug into his pocket and pulled out three small tubes. "He found some new flavors of edible glitter. I'm thinkin' maybe I like that guy."

"He never told you the third thing, you know," Adam pointed out.

Kris sat up and began to get up, then wiggled back into his place on Adam's lap. "Eh, forget it."

Lane and Adam gaped at Kris. "No hedgehog?" Lane asked in surprise.

"Nah. He can play his little games. FIrst off, I bet I know what the third thing was -- you being a dad. Second off -- I have way better games to play..." Kris wiggled slowly, then rocked on Adam's lap and watched Adam's eyes glaze over. "Oh yeah, like that. So later tonight, he can be all smug thinking he got one over on me, but I'll be licking edible glitter off the hottest guy on the planet..." He rocked again and laughed. "As you arise to the occasion. I win."


	40. Walking the Shar-Peis of life

**Chapter 40: Walking the Shar-Peis of life.**

"So the tour is titled, Curves in the Cosmos?" Jacob looked up, checking his notes. "You've really made a firm decision and it's not just, if it's Wednesday, it must be _this_ idea?"

Adam nodded as he looked at his own notes. "Yes, it's definite. The tour designer and I spent Monday and Tuesday plowing through about half the show now. We're both happy with it and can envision the rest of the show. I'm talking with the costume designers and they're already sketching. I'm asking for some costuming with black light effects for everyone. My idea is that the stage will be black to open and little pinpricks of stars will appear on the curtains, which open to some video from space of the astrological constellations. We'll be standing there -- all in black -- then the black lights will go up and the audience will see moving pinpricks of stars and it will be us." Adam continued talking, finally pulling out his laptop to show sketchs and videos as Jacob, Geoffrey and Lane made notes.

Geoffrey nodded. "Looks excellent. Just off the top of my head, I know we can create tour tee-shirts with the black light effect too, plus additional astrological themed merch. I'll put Hannah in touch with your tour designer and onto our merchandising department now that we've a definite title and theme."

"I want more than tee-shirts," Adam reminded them.

Looking at Adam's promo schedule on her Blackberry, Lane asked, "Where is merch with the EP's theme? Adam's been doing promo for the EP for ten days and I still see nothing applicable on the site. He has interviews lined up today and tomorrow and we're missing prime opportunities. This is unacceptable."

"Absolutely." Adam looked at Jacob. "That will be up on the site...tomorrow, right?"

"It better be. I'll make sure it is--" Jacob broke off as Kris approached their table with a coffee cup in hand. He nodded at Kris, then picked up his phone and began shooting off demanding emails. He wasn't the one who was going to get shredded by Lambert if the merch wasn't ready. 

"Hey, baby..." Adam smiled broadly as Kris pulled up a chair and squeezed it in next to him. "Why are you up so early?"

"My guitar lesson, remember?" Kris waved his hand. "Sorry, for interrupting." 

"That's quite alright," Geoffrey demurred. "Jacob here is busy sending cover-your-ass emails for the moment, so we'll have to wait to continue. Why not tell us about how your music career is going?"

"Why not?" Lane urged, planting her elbow on the table so she could rest her chin on the hand and looked wide-eyed with anticipation at Kris. "Why not tell us?"

"Because he's not pushing hard enough..."Adam blurted out, then winced when he saw the annoyed expression on Kris' face. "Sorry.... It's just that I while I understand that the coffee house gigs aren't the reason you get up in the morning, I don't understand why you haven't looked for a job working with kids. It's obvious you want to do it. I just don't get it."

"Me either," Lane agreed. "I'd like to understand myself. What's the problem, Kris?"

Kris rolled his eyes and shrugged. He couldn't be angry with Adam. Or Lane. They meant well, even if both of them seemed to have ingested way too much caffeine for this early in the morning. "And what references would I use? The pre-school back home that fired me for being a degenerate?"

"There are ways to handle that..." Jacob said absently. "How you sell yourself....if you want, that is."

"Jacob is right," Adam said softly, turning sideways to look Kris in the eyes. "It's like you're still punishing yourself for what happened back in Arkansas. Those fools fired you for being gay and you've fired yourself permanently from doing what you love because they're narrow-minded bigots. Why are you accepting their definition of what you can and cannot do?"

Kris frowned and looked down. Adam was being too intense for this early in the morning. "And why do you accept it when other people -- assholes -- define you as fat or having bad skin?"

Lane snapped her fingers between them. " _Finire_!"

"What's that?" Kris asked in confusion. 

"Italian for end it already."

Geoffrey smiled. "Since when do you know Italian?"

"I don't. I'm taking a class. I want to go to Italy next year on vacation."

"Oooh, Italy!" Adam nodded eagerly. "I know this great store in Milan..." 

 

"I don't know what to wear! What should I wear?"

"Excuse me, Miz Allen?" Cale asked, wrinkling his forehead in confusion. Why the hell was Kris' mom calling him Wednesday morning at work? "Why are you asking me about what to wear? Where?"

"When I go to LA."

"When you go to LA? Have you been in contact with Kris?" Cale asked, shocked that Kris hadn't called him to tell him the news. "I just gave you his phone number."

"No, but...." Kim looked blindly out over the racks of clothes. She would call. She would. " I need... some time to figure out what to say."

"After all the nagging you did, _now_ you're hesitating. Just like Kris. Avoiding--"

"I'm not avoiding. I'm... _planning_ ," Kim protested. Planning how to tell her husband. Or not. "I was thinking that maybe it would be better if I just went out there, saw him. Spoke face to face. That's why I'm shopping." 

"You know that even if you could find their place, they have security. You can't just walk up to the door and knock. You have to get through the gates and all that stuff."

"Security?" Kim frowned. "Well, that's a wrinkle. But I'll deal with it later. Right now I'll shop for a trip out there. I have to do it right. I mean, his boyfriend's a rock star."

"Kris still dresses in jeans and plaid. Hasn't changed the way he dresses at all -- well, I mean except for formal occasions when Adam dudes him up like some undertaker."

"Well, I've been Googling Adam's mother and she dresses up."

"Well, but I bet you're seeing pictures of her at events, so she's all glammed up. Plus _she's_ the mom of a rock star who used to be in theater. She knows how to dress the part."

"So she dresses normally every day?"

"Yeah. But it's not like she's gonna wear a sweatshirt with cats embroidered on it."

"Neither do I!"

"And you know what? I'm not goin' here..." Cale shook his head. "I can barely dress myself. No way am I gettin' into women's fashion. And the important thing here is not clothes, it's calling the boy. Don't make me regret giving you that number. Ma'am." 

 

"Lane, it's Cale."

"How are you? How's Gopher Flats on a Wednesday morning?" Lane smiled and looked away from Kris and Adam's knowing smirks at each other. It was too bloody early in the morning for their smirks. "Sorry, I didn't return your call from yesterday. We're neck deep in promo for the EP."

"It's not Gopher Flats." Cale shook his head. Lane knew it just as well as he did. "It's... interestin' in an annoying kinda way. And it's about to get that way out in your neck of the woods. Or mebbe it will, I don't know."

"Why? Are you coming to visit again?"

"No. I gave Kris' phone number to Miz Allen."

"Oh!" Lane exclaimed, then seeing the curious looks on everyone's faces, smiled and whispered, "Private. Excuse me." Getting up and moving to another table, she whispered, "I'm assuming you called me and not Kris for a reason."

"You betcha. I gave her the number, but I don't know when she'll call. Her husband doesn't really want her to and in my opinion she's like Kris -- avoiding conflict, so I don't know if or when she's gonna call. I don't want to get Kris' hopes up."

Lane worried her lip in her teeth for a few moments, then whispered, "I see your point. If she doesn't come through... He'd be absolutely devastated. Nonetheless, if she calls out of the blue, he might fall over in shock. Who knows how he'd react?"

"So maybe he needs some...hints? Can you do that?"

"I'll try and if not... I know who can..." Lane smiled as she felt Adam's curious gaze on her. Nosy bugger. But always up for it.

 

"Prime the pump? Sure, I can do it," Adam began, then stopped when he saw Kris in the doorway giving him a _look_. Ever since he'd made what he admitted was a way too pushy comment the other morning at Starbucks, Kris had been giving him _looks._ Annoyed, then thoughtful, then sweet. It was confusing. Although they usually ended up having sex after every one of those _looks_ , so maybe he shouldn't complain. Just... go with the flow. Yup, he could do that. Sure. 

"What's that mean?" Kris asked, leaning against the doorway to their bedroom, where Adam sat on the bed talking on the phone. They were supposed to be out jogging, but Adam had pulled on his shorts only to announce he needed to make one business call, that had turned into ten. Maybe he wasn't focused enough on his career, but Adam made up for it. Guy needed a break. Or to take his shorts off, because seeing him half naked in their bed wasn't near good enough. He walked forward and tugged his shirt and shorts off and tossed them onto the floor.

"Oh, you know how when I make a sex joke just to hear Lane tell me to, 'Bloody well stuff it, Adam!" Adam grinned and tuned his phone off as Kris climbed on top of him and pulled his shorts off. Well, this day was looking up. Literally. 

"Lane is even bossier than you are." Kris smiled as he knelt in front of Adam, pushed his feet apart and stroked his hands up Adam's legs. He looked up slowly, his eyes taking the scenic route up Adam's body before locking on his face. Those eyes... Adam was looking at him with the sharpness of anticipation, the heat of need and the tenderness of love. Everything, everything was in his eyes. Including a hint of determined patience as Kris guessed Adam was trying not to be too pushy. Truth was, Adam was pushy about Kris' career not in order to get his own way, but because he loved him and wanted the best for him. 

A huge difference from his parents and.... he was not seriously thinking about his parents while he was in bed with a naked Adam Fucking Lambert, was he? Priorities, Allen, priorities. "And as much as I know you hate following anyone's orders, I wouldn't mind if you followed that particular set."

"Oh?" Adam smiled and curled his hands around Kris' ass, pulling him up tight against him, before taking his mouth in a demanding kiss, that deepened when Kris planted his hands on Adam's shoulders, tilted his head and swooped in. When they broke apart to breathe, Adam asked, "You want me to stuff you?" 

"Yeah, we'll start with my mouth." Kris smiled at the flare of heat in Adam's eyes and slowly slid his body back down Adam's, licking and kissing the freckles on the bare skin as he slowly moved toward his destination. He groaned as he felt Adam's hands massaging his scalp and turned his head to bite at the taut flesh of Adam's thigh, smiling against the skin when he felt it tighten in reaction. "Yeah, stuff me, stuff my mouth."

"What the..." Adam whispered, feeling the blood rush to his groin and stiffen his cock at Kris' words and, damn, that look on his face. Kris seldom talked dirty, so... dayummm. 

"Are you gonna?" Kris asked, lightly nipping Adam's leg as he moved up to the groin, then turned his head to slowly lick a path up Adam's balls, feeling the reverberations of Adam's groan against his mouth. "Are you gonna..." He flicked his tongue against the underside of the head of Adam's cock and smiled. "Are you gonna... Stuff my mouth with that big cock?"

Gripping the base of his cock in one hand and sliding his other around the back of Kris' neck, Adam pushed Kris down. "I'll always give you what you want. Open up."

Curling his hands slowly around Adam's legs, then under his buttocks, Kris lifted Adam up as his mouth descended, eagerly licking, then sucking at the hard cock that was already leaking for him. When Adam groaned, he felt his own cock jerk, rising against his stomach; when Adam shuddered, he groaned; when Adam began thrusting into him, Kris had to use one hand to grip the base of his own cock to keep control. He slid his mouth down then back up again, moving his other hand to Adam's cock, sliding his fingers into his mouth, wetting them. Sending his wet fingers before his mouth, he licked down the shaft and over the balls, feeling Adam's gasp of surprise as he gently circled his hole with his wet fingers, waiting for Adam to say something. 

Biting his lip to keep from ordering Kris to just do it, Adam held his breath. Kris wasn't usually so... He looked down, trying to see Kris' eyes and smiled when he saw the impatience in the brown eyes that opened to stare up at him. "If you want to, do it." He waited, feeling his heart pound in time with the pulsing beat in his impatient cock as Kris raised his head and his warm wet mouth descended on it at the same time he slid a finger inside Adam. They both groaned. Adam forced his eyes open and licked his lips as he watched a kneeling Kris wiggle his body, his ass moving in the air. Oh hell, he wanted that ass. Next time, right now, Kris' mouth was so... damn... hot... 

His lips were tingling and his mouth was stretched, but Kris couldn't get enough and kept stroking his tongue along that spot that he knew drove Adam crazy, while his index finger was joined by his middle finger. When he felt the raised spot inside Adam and Adam cried out, Kris began to shake with need and then moaned when Adam spilled into his mouth. Eagerly sucking and licking every drop, Kris looked up to see the fulfilled desire on Adam's face. He had actually given that to Adam. 

"Was that what you wanted?" Adam asked, hearing the rasp in his voice. Kris had been... pushy and demanding and it was... hot. He liked this alternate version of Kris. 

"I want to stuff you this time..." Kris said as he slowly pulled his mouth away from Adam's cock. "Can I?"

"Get a condom," Adam ordered. He rolled his eyes as Kris whined about wasting time. "Do not pout. Guys who are topping should not pout."

"You pout all the time!"

"Not when I'm topping." Rolling over, Adam grabbed the lube and tossed it at Kris, then pulled a condom out of the nightstand drawer too and held it up. "Think about it. I am not leaking while I'm jogging."

"Oh." Kris bit his lip, then burst out laughing. "And that would be the time when the paps would come out and take pictures of you jogging."

"Which is bad enough on any given day, but to be all... juicy?"

Bursting out laughing, Kris flung himself on top of Adam. "Juicy..." Kris laughed again. He never knew what was going to happen with Adam, with anything. Well, except that it was going to be great and he was going to be happy. "God, I can't get enough of you, you know that?" He began licking the damp skin stretched across Adam's chest as Adam ripped open the condom packet and sheathed him.

"Show me." Adam grinned, then nodded toward the tube of lube. "But first, I do need some... juice." He spread his legs, watching Kris' face as he touched him, gently, then demandingly, while wishing he could somehow capture that look, that need in song. He had tried before, so many songs and no matter what he did, art could never surpass nature. 

"Aren't you going to order me around?" Kris asked, bending his head to rest his forehead against Adam's chest. Lubing Adam up had tested his self control again, the intimacy of it... He couldn't believe this beautiful man trusted him enough... "Tell me what to do?"

"First of all, I don't order you around, I make suggestions. Secondly, you seemed like you were complaining about my _suggestions_ the other day, so..." Adam sniffed and looked up at the ceiling, blinking his eyes rapidly. 

"Are you pouting?"

"Well, I'm the bottom so I'm allowed to pout."

"Bitch!" Kris laughed as he bent forward and bit Adam's pouting bottom lip. "First of all...." He paused to return to Adam's lip, scraping his teeth along the plump fullness before forgetting what he'd been about to say to focus on what he wanted most at the moment -- Adam's mouth, kissing him back. 

"First of all... what?" Adam asked as Kris lifted his head and stared down at him. He ran his hands down Kris' arms, feeling the tension in the tight muscles, the heat pouring off his body matching the heat in his eyes. He was sure, damn sure, that no one had ever looked at him the way Kris did, that no one had ever filled his heart the way Kris did. 

"I..." Kris shook his head. "I have no idea what I was gonna say, but I do know that I want you."

"That always perfect..." 

"You're perfect. How about..." Kris rolled off of Adam onto his back. "I want to see you, touch all of you. Get on top." When Adam grinned at the word 'top', Kris pinched his leg. "Shut up. And I mean that in a hurry-up-I-need-to-feel-you-around-me-before-I-embarrass-myself kinda way."

"I aim to please," Adam said as he positioned himself over Kris and lowered, teasing the head of Kris' cock before suddenly pushing his body down, engulfing Kris inside himself. He bucked at the fullness inside and the way Kris' cock hardened inside him, even as Kris' face tightened with lust. 

"Oh that's...." Kris moaned, sliding his hands up Adam's legs again, before curving them around Adam's hips and digging into his ass, feeling the muscles flex under his fingers as Adam tightened himself around Kris' cock. "God, you're so hot..."

"Funny, that's what I was thinking about you..." Adam retorted, as he began to raise and lower himself, placing his hands on Kris' chest, his fingers playing with Kris' hardened nipples. He blinked in surprise as Kris planted his feet firmly, raised his knees and began thrusting inside him, meeting his body, with a rush of movement, soft cries and a frantic look on his face.

"Need you!" Kris cried out, all too soon, as he felt Adam move with some twist or swirl of his hips that pushed him over the edge far sooner than he'd hoped, but oh god, felt too good to resist. "Love you..." He groaned out, sighing happily when Adam bent down and kissed him, thoroughly, his tongue and lips extending the aftershocks singing throughout his veins. 

"Love you too," Adam whispered against Kris' lips as he gently rode Kris until he was shaking his head and babbling. Removing the condom and pulling a cleansing wipe out of a box, Adam cleaned them both, walking quickly into the bathroom. As he put the discarded items in the trash, he caught sight of himself in the mirror and laughed. He was a mess. A happy mess though. Great day this had turned out be! He couldn't wait for the rest of it.

Kris turned his head and hugged Adam's pillow. Smelled almost as good as he did. So nice and warm and... "Ow!" Kris shrieked when Adam slapped his butt. 

"Ready to go jogging?" 

"Are you fucking serious? My legs are--"

"Gorgeous." Adam laughed and pulled Kris' hands. "C'mon, let's go!"

Kris grunted, then grumbled, "Apparently you didn't get the memo, but guys are supposed to be sleepy after sex."

"Hello. My name is Adam Lambert. What's yours, cute guy?"

"Huh?" 

"Well, clearly we don't know each other if you could entertain for one minute the notion that I care about how I'm _supposed_ to act before, during or after sex." Adam snorted as he found his shorts under the bed and began getting dressed.

"True enough," Kris admitted, turning around in a circle to find his clothes. "Are we really going jogging?"

"Of course. So...." Adam smiled as he watched Kris bend over to get dressed. "Did you jog back in Conway?"

"I... yeah, I did. I started when I was on the baseball team and then found it was a good way to... clear my head, ya know?"

"Hmm. Was it also a way to relax since when you were running you didn't have to pretend to be something you weren't?"

Kris froze as he considered the idea. And Adam's tendency to throw out important ideas like they were cheap jellybeans at the pigs at Merlin's farm. "How did you know?"

"I felt that way when I was on stage. I mean, when I was acting, before I became a solo artist. When I was pretending to be someone else, I was actually most myself." Adam's voice was muffled as he pushed his head through the neck of his tee-shirt. 

"That's..." Kris paused, then waited while Adam shepherded him downstairs and they found their sneakers. "Don't take this the wrong way, but that's kinda..."

"Perverse. I know." Adam shrugged. "A lot of actors are like that, so scared to be themselves that the only way they can be comfortable is to be someone else."

"But that's not what you said!" Kris protested, rubbing the back of his neck in confusion. 

"Whatever. So how do you feel on stage? Do you feel exposed or--"

"What is this? Twenty Questions, the post-coital edition?" Kris shook his head and followed Adam out of the house. "Damn, you're energized." 

"I'm...curious. You know, I'm sorry for blabbing on the other morning about you and your career, but it comes from a place of confusion. Why don't you want to perform more?"

"Not everyone lives to perform like you do," Kris rolled his eyes. 

"I know. Everyone is different. But the point of music is to share it. Isn't it?"

"Yes, but I can do that with song-writing." 

"Okay, that's true."

"Well, gee thanks for admitting that my own thoughts are truthful."

"That's not always true."

"I need more coffee..." Kris mumbled. 

Yes, his skill sets included distraction, Adam thought smugly. "When you were performing back in Toad Suck, did your...parents and friends come to cheer you on?"

"Well, sure. My mom was always there, actually." Kris smiled. "She was my one-woman cheering section." He paused. "Hey. You know what? It didn't hurt to say that." 

"That's fantastic." Adam smiled in relief. He counted their steps, while debating.

"What obnoxious thing are you debating about asking me?" Kris asked, looking sideways at Adam's face. "I know your face."

"I really need to take some more acting classes..." Adam grumbled. "So. Do you think -- not that I'm trying to press you or anything--"

"Oh, of course not!" Kris scoffed. "You? Press me? Never!"

"I'm glad you agree," Adam said drily. "Now. My question is -- do you think that one reason you're not pushing yourself to perform is because your mom isn't in the audience these days?"

"I'm not that immature and needy!" Kris snapped.

"Okay, okay, hedgehog..." 

"Seriously, I'm not!" Kris huffed and sped up to pass Adam.

"If you think following your ass is some sort of punishment..." Adam called out, then groaned as he spotted photographers at the corner. "Hey, guys." He hurried as Kris slowed down, meeting quickly. 

"You two having a fight?" A paparazzo asked eagerly.

"Nope!" Kris immediately glued himself to Adam's side. "Nope, he was teasing me and as usual I can't help but rising to the bait."

"Of course not. I have a very big hook." Adam grinned as the photographers groaned. 

Laughing, Kris agreed, "Very big _hook_."

 

"This is Kris' phone. But this isn't Kris. How may I help you?" Adam asked, holding his breath as he slowly closed the refrigerator. 

"I..."

"Is this Kris' mom?" Adam asked swiftly. He had recognized the area code and given Cale's warning, this had to be her, finally. 

"Yes. Is this...Adam?"

"This is he. It's good to talk to you. Kris has spoken in detail about you, usually in conjunction with how he misses you," Adam said softly, then fell silent, waiting.

Kim realized she was holding her hand over her mouth, pulled it down and cleared her throat while debating how to answer that world-class opening hit. Finally, she asked, "Am I supposed to feel guilty?"

"Yes."

Kim burst out laughing. "Well. Nothing if not honest."

"That will be my epitaph, no doubt," Adam agreed. "And if I'm being honest... Kris will be sad to have missed your call _if_ you've called to reconnect with him and not try and yell at him for not meeting your expectations or to tell him he's going to hell."

"I won't!"

"Good. Because I must tell you, the guy has already been through hell and doesn't need a return ticket. And there is no way I'm going to let him go there again. If it means protecting him from you, I'll do it. I hope that's clear."

Kim froze. Cale had refused to give her Kris' number for months after she'd asked because he'd straight up told her that he wasn't sure he could trust her not to break Kris' heart again. And now Kris' boyfriend was saying the same thing. What kind of monster did they think she was? Well, then again, she had stood by while her husband threw their son out of the house and had never contacted him. She wasn't going to win mother of the year. That was true. "That was straight talk."

"I can talk straight, anyway."

"Huh?" Kim asked absently, hearing Adam's sigh. Apparently she had missed something. A joke? A joke after a warning? Confusing. After a long moment of silence, while she digested Adam's words, she snorted and said, "Cale said you were a sweet guy, bossy, but could cut right to the jugular to protect the people you care about." 

"Cale's a smart man," Adam observed. He wiped a damp hand on his jeans and plowed ahead, "So why are you calling now? What made you decide to contact your son after _all_ this time? What do you want from him?" 

Wow. This guy was a brick wall. And her husband thought gays were wimps? Ha. She'd pay good money to see Adam and Neil Allen in a room together. But.. at least Kris had found a guy who loved him enough to protect him. Everyone needed that from time to time. She smiled and nodded. "Fair enough. Ever since those interviews at the Oscars... I realized, I don't know how I didn't see before -- he's my son. Still. Always. He's my son, my son..."

Biting his lip before continuing, Adam released a breath he hadn't known he was holding. Cautiously optimistic, he continued, "He was always your son. Being gay doesn't change that."

"I'm realizing that and... I also realized that honestly I'd rather Kris be gay and pick a great guy than some of the daughters-in-law my friends deal with. Cale says you're great and and..." Kim laughed nervously. "And I saw pictures of you two canoodling at a release party? For some cd called Short and/or Sweet?"

"Yes. My EP."

"Is the title about Kris?" Kim asked hesitantly. She wasn't sure how to negotiate this conversation. She was off-balance and nervous and yes, she was feeling guilty. And now... Hearing from someone other than Cale that Kris had gone through hell... My god, what had they done? 

"Mmm, in part. That release party was a few weeks ago, though. We had a great time out with our family and friends. Kris' new family. I'm sure Kris wishes you had been there too."

Kim gasped. Damn, this man was _good_ at this. Persistent too. "Do you ever stop with the guilt trip?"

"Why, when it's only one bus stop away? No transfers."

Kim heaved a sigh. "You're very protective of him, aren't you?"

"We protect each other. Isn't that what you're supposed to do for your spouse?"

"You said on the Oscars red carpet that you would marry him?"

"In a second. Well... not in a second. I mean, we'd have to plan the party. Help my mom shop for a dress..."

"Oh, I..." Kim swallowed. "I hate it when the kids elope and you don't get to be part of that day. And planning the party..."

"Totally. After all, a wedding is the biggest party you can legitimately throw for yourself without looking like a total narcissist."

"As long as you don't become a bridezilla."

"My mom and dad and my brother would never let that happen!" Adam laughed. "Believe me, they'd all cut me down to size. And Kris would give me a full body check too."

"He would? And I never supposed Kris would ..."

"Kris... has his moments, Mrs. Allen. He has a temper and can be incredibly stubborn."

" _Kris_?" Kim asked incredulously, then frowned. "Wait, Cale did mention that. I guess... he's changed."

"Of course, I wouldn't know since I didn't know him back then. But based upon what Cale has said, Kris has changed from when you knew him. The experiences he's had since leaving Conway had an effect. So I'll warn you that you can't expect him to be the son you once knew."

Kim nodded, then realized that her son's boyfriend couldn't see her. "I suppose you're right. But... " She shook her head, telling herself she'd think about it later and changed the subject. "Why are you answering his phone?"

"Kris went out to run errands, buy some food, and as usual forgot his phone--"

"He does that all the time!"

"Yes, he does." Adam chuckled, hoping she did not hear the nervous tone in it. "This time he left it in the refrigerator. So frustrating, especially when he's gone to the grocery store and you think of an item for him to get, but can't reach him --"

"Just like his father! But Kris doesn't mind you answering his phone?"

"Not enough to remember to take it with him." Adam looked at the clock on the kitchen wall. He normally wouldn't have answered Kris' phone, but knowing that his mother might call at any time, he wanted to make contact. "He should be back in less than an hour. Are you going to call him back? Can you _promise_ that you'll treat him better this time than last time? That you won't berate him for his orientation or his choices in life? Because he does not need that shit."

"I..." Kim vacillated. She'd worked herself up to make this call, had assumed she'd talk to Kris and everything would go back to the way it was. Now that she'd actually talked to Adam, she realized that Cale was right and Kris might not just fall into her arms and go back to being her sweet boy again. She didn't know how to handle that. "I don't know how to handle this. I don't. I thought I'd call him and it would be the way it was before, but... I'm getting that it won't be because he's not the same and he has a different life and... Maybe I should think on it some more?"

"Ah." Adam slapped his hand against the counter in frustration. She was running away from conflict, avoiding it -- the way Kris used to. He looked at the clock again. Kris should have been home already, but wasn't. That was no doubt fate's way of ensuring Adam checked everything out. "You know what? To be honest, it's not a major problem if you decided to stay away from your son. My mother loves Kris as if he were her own son. I'm so lucky to have her and now Kris is lucky to have her too. She has so much love to give. And..." Adam counted to three because if there was one skill all those years in theater had honed, it was timing. "And after we bring home some grandchildren for her, well, we'll be hard-pressed to keep her from moving in with us."

"Grandchildren?" Kim squeaked.

"Yes, indeed. It will be a terrible shame, quite a loss, if your grandchildren grow up without knowing you."

"Well, that's..."

"A damn shame. I know how much Kris loves Christmas. He's such a kid himself. I'm sure you remember. But it will be _such_ a shame you'll never see your own grandchildren on Christmas morning..." Adam paused. Wait for it. Yup. The sniffle. He was such a bitch. But for a good cause. Kris' happiness. 

 

"Thank you all so much for coming to our school today!" The principal gushed as she rushed forward in the parking lot to meet everyone.

"Our pleasure," Adam said smoothly. "We're always happy to do our part for Donor's Choose and arts education. Where would any of us be without public school arts programs, after all?" 

"The kids will be so excited!" The music teacher smiled as they all walked towards the side door, while Lane conferred with the principal about the small media set up inside the doors and the schedule for the day. They'd had their instruments delivered earlier and set up on the auditorium stage before the children enrolled in music classes were brought in for a music assembly.

"Thanks for sitting in here for Tommy while he plays lead guitar for Monte." Adam squeezed Kris' arm as they walked. He looked down and smiled. Kris was practically bouncing on his sneakers with excitement. Sometimes life really did work out for the best. 

"Is Monte coming on tour with us or does this gig with Madonna today on Letterman mean he's going on tour with her?" Camilla the keyboardist asked bluntly.

Adam frowned. Knowing that there were photographers inside, he smoothed out his features and shrugged. "Fudge if I know. But I know I can't wait forever for him to decide-- Ow!" He exclaimed as Kris stepped on his foot. "Okay, I know. I'm supposed to be more circumspect..."

"If that means shutting your mouth..." Kris smiled up at Adam, then licked his own lips while staring at Adam's mouth.

"Ha. Like that's ever going to happen." Tommy rolled his eyes. "He's either talking in person or glued to his phone." 

"Hey, Kris, do you have your phone?" Adam asked nonchalantly. After talking to Mrs. Allen for nearly an hour and a follow-up conversation with Cale, he was reasonably confident that he could trust her not to screw it up this time. That is, if she didn't chicken out, if she ever called back. If she didn't do it soon, he and Lane and Cale were going to have to tell Kris. Gods, he didn't want to see Kris hurt. 

"What is up with you dogging me about having my phone the last few days?" Kris looked at Adam curiously. 

"Maybe you left it at home when you were shopping and he realized you two needed l--- lemonade?" Isaac the drummer asked with a grin and wink toward the school buliding. 

Tommy smirked as he remembered an hysterical argument on the bus when Kris forget to buy lube while on tour. "Yeah, a lack of _lemonade_ might totally irk Adam. Totally." He fell silent as they entered the door and arranged themselves according to Lane's directions, posing for pictures and then listening while Adam made a statement and answered a few questions from the two reporters given entre for the event. 

One videographer went into the room to focus on the children while another filmed from behind as Adam and the band went into the room and the principal announced who was visiting for their special music assembly. Adam stepped forward as pandemonium erupted, giving the band a chance to check their instruments while he fielded questions from over-excited children. 

"Kids just love Adam," Camilla noted with a smile as she turned on her keyboard. 

"He has a good aura," Tommy agreed. 

Kris nodded. "He feels safe. And he has an expressive face. Kids love that. That's why successful performers for kids exaggerate their facial expressions -- it reads better for kids."

"Yeah, you used to work with kids, didn't you?" Tommy asked, already knowing the answer. He also had a strong suspicion as to the reason why Adam hadn't been particularly angry that Monte had backed out of today's field trip. 

"Yeeesssss... and Adam and Lane have been pushing me to try it again. But I'm sure you already know that. Don't you?"   
Kris whispered back in a rush as they set up their instruments.

"You give me way too much credit for omniscience," Tommy prevaricated.

"Apparently I didn't give you enough credit for knowing three dollar words," Kris snipped back.

"Oooh, it's hedgehog time." Tommy grinned. Seeing Kris' glare, he caved. "Okay, you know it, I know it. Or rather, I can guess that Adam wanted you to come out here so you'd remember how much you liked working with kids. It doesn't require waterboarding to know that non-secret. Adam thinks he's sly, but he's not." 

Kris paused, then laughed. "You're right."

"I always am. Hedgehog." 

"Shut up. Bleached blonde--" 

"Okay." Lane slapped both Tommy and Kris on the back. "You're like two little boys --- brothers -- sniping at each other. Get it in gear." 

"We're all set!" Kris grinned. "We can snark at each other and check our instruments at the same time."

"Hmm." Camilla tapped her chin. "You'd think they were women, what with that ability to multitask." 

"Well, I've seen Tommy in drag, so...." Isaac whispered. 

Tommy giggled. "That was a fun Halloween. But Kris -- you're good to go? You know all the songs on acoustic?" 

Nodding, Kris put the acoustic bass in front of him. "I'm good." 

Settling into position, the band waited while Adam finished his initial comments, then introduced the band. After sitting down on a stool provided, he nodded at the music teacher who stepped forward. 

"Mr. Lambert and his band are going to give us a demonstration about how different instruments come together to create a piece of music and how that sound and the feeling or meaning of a piece can change depending upon how you emphasize different instruments."

Adam smiled and introduced the band. "Okay, we're going to start off with a quiz. How many instruments are we playing today?"

 

"That was awesome!" Kris exclaimed as he opened his guitar case ninety minutes later after the program had concluded. They'd each had a chance to talk to kids interested in their particular instrument. He'd forgotten how much fun teaching was. 

"You had a great time, didn't you?" Adam asked, touching Kris' elbow. Kris was practically glowing with contentment. He hoped Kris would acknowledge that reality and move forward. 

"You know I did..." Kris trailed off. He had been in denial, deceiving himself, kidding himself -- however you put it, he had been ignoring what he wanted and now... It was going to be way harder to ignore. Maybe he should--

"Mr. Allen?" A young voice asked.

Kris turned around and then bent down to look the little girl at eye level. "You can call me, Kris, darlin'. What can I do for you?" 

"Do they make guitars in my size like that?" The little girl cautiously touched her index finger onto the gleaming wood of the guitar.

Smiling, Kris gently placed the girl's hand on the strings and demonstrated a chord, while explaining, "They do. In fact, I think part of Mr. Lambert's fans' donations went to buy guitars for your school," Kris reminded her. "So I'm sure you could borrow one or however they do it."

"I know, but... how about lessons?" The girl asked. "Mr. Lambert said that you have to have lessons and practice a lot if you want to get really good. I know my parents can't pay for outside lessons and there is only one teacher and she can't teach everyone everything, you know." 

"Maybe...I could work something out with your teacher and volunteer at the school..." Kris said softly, then blinked when the girl shrieked loudly in excitement and ran back over to the teacher. 

Adam and Lane looked at each other and smiled. They kept smiling as they finished up with the school and everyone toted their equipment back to their vehicles in the parking lot. 

"Wipe the smug look off your faces. Both of you..." Kris rubbed the back of his neck and looked down to avoid showing them his grin. "How did I ever end up with a boyfriend and best friend who are the two bossiest people in the world..."

"You _chose_ us," Lane retorted. "Your choice." 

"Besides..." Tommy interjected.

"Can't you ever mind your own beeswax?" Kris griped, already knowing the answer. Tommy was one of the nosiest people he'd ever met. 

"Seriously, dude. Get a grip on reality. Half of the fun of my life comes from sticking my nose in other people's far more interesting business." Tommy shrugged. "And as I was saying when I was so rudely interrupted, you can be pretty bossy too, Hedgehog."

"I am not!"

"Yes, you are!" Everyone called out.

"Like how?" Kris challenged. "Examples!"

"Oh, no problem. In fact, let's make it more challenging by adding a Kris-type southern accent to our mimicry," Adam urged, then dropped his voice to a soft, deeper sound, "Adammmmm.... you really should wear sumthin' other than black. How 'bout blue? I like blue... Wear blue, Adammmmmm."

"Oh, but that's different..." Kris began, then subsided as everyone else laughed. He wasn't really bossy. Was he? 

"Oh, I'm so there!" Tommy gleefully agreed. "Lane, you start." 

Lane began with, "You should swim, Adam. It'll be good for exercise and stress management." She then pointed at each person, then went around again. 

"You should take some time off, Adammmmmmm." 

"You should punch Neil in the nose, Adammmmmm. Or find him a girlfriend."

"Eat some ice cream, Adammmmmm. It won't hurt. Stop obsessin' about your weight."

"Be something other than a vampire for Halloween, Adammmmmm." 

"Wear the purple edible glitter tonight, Adammmmmmm. That tastes good..." Tommy trailed off as Kris and Adam stared at him. "Oops, guess I wasn't supposed to hear that. Anywaaaaaaaaay.... Kris, you may not be _as_ bossy as Adam or Lane, because that's probably humanly impossible, but you have your moments." 

"Holy shit. I am bossy!" Kris gaped in astonishment. "I... never realized it. I never used to be. When did that happen? Whoa." 

"Giddy-yap, Ponyboy, on your route to self-knowledge," Isaac responded. "I gotta get back to my day job. Later!"

They waved to each other. Lane touched Kris' arm as Adam stepped aside to take a phone call. Speaking of which, when was Kris' mum going to ring him? Argh. "You are going to volunteer, right?"

"The background check..." Kris said automatically, then stopped himself. It had become a bad habit, this fear of his. He had to shake it off, move on. Be a man about it. Tough it out. 

"The background check will come back fine -- you've never even gotten a speeding ticket!" Lane argued. "It's just a regular background check; they're looking for arrests and convictions, not gossip from religious fanatics from Cast-You-Out, Arkansas!"

"So you mean they're not so paranoid that they're gonna send a blonde who thinks she's Sydney Bristow to a small town to ferret out all my secrets?" Kris teased, not sure if he was teaching Adam and Lane or himself.

 

 

"What's up? Why wouldn't you tell me over the phone why you wanted lunch?" Adam asked with a smile as Geoffrey joined him at the table for lunch a few days later. The Polo Lounge, no less. Old Hollywood. Cool. "The EP is doing well, isn't it?"

"It's not about the EP. Which _is_ doing well. As are the tour ticket sales, before you make a comment about that. It's personal. I have a... question to ask you." Geoffrey beckoned the waiter over and they both placed drink orders. 

"Well?" Adam tilted his head and stared curiously at his manager who had fallen silent after the waiter left. Highly uncharacteristic. "Are you... blushing?"

"Of course not. I'm far too old for such nonsense." Geoffrey waved his hand dismissively. 

"Okay. But why are you asking me about something personal? I don't get it," Adam admitted. 

"You don't, do you?" Geoffrey sighed. Adam was bloody smart, but sometimes when he'd made up his mind about something, he could be as dense and immovable as a brick. Like those hideous harem pants. He'd tried to pay Kris to destroy them, but the boy had unfortunately grown into high ethical standards. "My fiancee really likes Hugh Grant. She made me watch some movie in which he plays a talented version of Andrew Ridgely from Wham... What's that movie?"

"Music and Lyrics," Adam supplied, wondering where this conversation as going. "It's Dani's favorite movie. I've seen it a katrillion times."

"The things we do for the women in our lives." Geoffrey grinned.

"You don't seem too upset by it."

"No. All relationships require give and take. And sometimes shutting one's mouth."

"I hear you." Adam winced to himself and leaned back as the waiter delivered their drinks and they ordered lunch. "I have a tendency to blurt out what I'm thinking."

"No? Really? I hadn't noticed," Geoffrey teased. "Anywho... Theresa pointed out that you and I have a relationship like Hugh's character does with his manager in the movie."

Adam's lips parted in surprise. "We do?" The two characters were good friends. 

"She said you didn't see our relationship properly. Now, Adam." Geoffrey patted Adam's hand. "I know that people in the industry screwed you over in the past, but there is no reason for you to think that I'd do that to you. We've been together ever since Idol and not once, not once, have I ever wavered in my support of you. Personally and professionally." If Adam only knew.

Adam looked down at his iced tea and watched the light glint off the ice cubes as he considered Geoffrey's words. "Kris or Lane -- I don't remember which one -- then again, maybe both. Well, anyway, someone said that I wasn't analyzing our relationship properly and that given I'd gotten you back with Theresa, that deep down I..." Adam shrugged sheepishly. "I knew we were both more than business associates with a friendly relationship, but that we were really pretty tight friends." 

"I've viewed us in that light," Geoffrey agreed and waited. Adam would process in his own time and any second he'd start talking, figuring it out by talking as always. He took a sip of his drink and nodded as Adam began reviewing their relationship and finally concluded around the time they both finished their lunches. Geoffrey grinned and asked, "So, given that you are responsible for getting Theresa and me back together, I'd like to ask you to be my best man."

"Are you serious?" Adam gaped. Wow. Apparently, he had totally misread their relationship. Or perhaps, he'd refused to read the signs. Blinking, he saw the hurt look on Geoffrey's face and hurried to repair the damage. "I'm sorry. I'm just surprised, but naturally I'd be thrilled!"

"Good. I was growing worried."

"Sorry, I was just realizing that as best man, I'm entitled to make a toast," Adam prevaricated. 

"Ah. Permit me to guess -- you'll take all the credit for the two of us getting back together."

"You make it sound as if I don't deserve it. When in fact..." Adam smiled. "You would have never called her, would you? You'd still be whining about your lost opportunity for twu wuv if I hadn't invited her to my party."

"Dear boy, there's a little more than propinquity to creating a good relationship."

"True. But it helps to be in the same state." 

"Speaking of states, has Kris gotten over his state of fear about volunteering at the school?" 

"It's on my agenda to talk to him about it this afternoon. But right now, tell me about the wedding." 

"Well, we're still settling on the location..." 

 

"Do you know where your phone is?" Adam asked as he joined Kris on the patio before Kris went into work. He usually tried to carve out time in between their individual commitments to just be together. 

"What is up with you and my phone?" Kris grumbled, pulling it out of his pocket to show Adam and setting it down on the table. 

"The school should be calling about your background check coming through any time now." Adam shrugged. "I hope you're going to volunteer."

"I know you do." 

"If you want to volunteer at the school, that's what you should do," Adam urged as they sat down on an outdoor chaise. He curled his arm around Kris' bare shoulders and smiled when Kris snuggled into him, burying his face in Adam's shoulder. "You told me a long time ago that you liked working with kids and the kids need you. It seems like a win-win to me." 

"I know, but..." Kris bit his lip. "It's volunteer. Not a paying position."

Adam nodded and then held Kris' hand. "I know bringing in money is important to you, but I want you to know that _I'm_ fine with supporting us. As a couple, a team."

"Geoffrey says..." Kris began. Rubbing his hand up and down Adam's thigh, he blurted out, "He says that being able to support yourself financially is critical to a healthy balance of power." 

"Geoffrey's relationship is not ours," Adam argued. "Besides, you've always called me on my shit when I get _too_ bossy..."

"Outside of sex," Kris said quickly. "Because I'm not sure you can get too bossy for me there, you know." 

"You have your preferences, don't you?" Laughing, Adam brushed the back of Kris' neck, watching him shiver. 

"And anyway, we... fit together. Even outside of sex. It works, right?"

"You have to ask?" Adam smiled and pulled Kris onto him and into his arms, both of them sighing as their bodies fit together. 

"I need the reassurance. Kiss me." Kris wrapped his arms around Adam's shoulders and melted into him as their lips met and clung, again and again. 

Smiling as he softly kissed his way along Kris' jaw, Adam continued the conversation. "Besides, Geoffrey told me that he thinks part of the problem was that he was flying high at work at the time, surrounding himself with sycophants who exacerbated his worst tendencies toward control. I seem to have surrounded myself with people who don't put up with shit. Can you imagine what my mom or dad or Lane would do if I ever tried that sort of crap?"

"True. And we established the other day that apparently I have my moments too," Kris admitted, arching his back to push more of his chest into Adam's stroking hands, gasping slightly when Adam pinched his nipples. "Anyway, you know it and that's half the battle." 

"See?" Adam stroked his hands down the smooth skin of Kris' back, then pulled at the waistband of Kris' shorts. "Why aren't you naked, by the way?" he asked, moving his hands Kris' chest and thumbing the nipples again.

"What are you doing?" Kris ground his ass onto Adam's lap. His denim-covered lap, topped by a shirt, because of course Adam was fully dressed. "I thought we were talking about..."

"We can multitask. Listen." Adam stopped teasing Kris and put his hands on Kris' shoulders and squeezed. "I want you to be happy and if my income allows you to do what you want, what makes you happy and allows you to volunteer for something kids desperately need, then why not use it? We're fortunate enough that you don't _need_ to work, Kris. So why not do what you love? Isn't that what everyone wants -- to do what they love?"

Kris froze. Adam had always been so paranoid about someone leeching off of him, so this offer was momentous. He hadn't heard it, not really, the other times Adam had made it, but now... after being with the kids again, he... Well, Adam would say he'd achieved a moment of clarity. "It would be like cutting off my nose to spite my face, wouldn't it? You're right."

"I always am." Adam smiled smugly. He had seen the lightbulb go off over Kris' head and known that Kris had finally smoothed out that wrinkle of fear and was moving on into the future filled with more happiness. Now, if only Kim Allen would call and not screw it up. 

"I swear, I'm gonna slap you some day..." Kris warned. "Oooh! You get me going." 

"Do I have enough time to get you coming?" Adam asked with a grin as he slid his hand inside Kris' shorts.

 

"Kris!" Adam yelled an hour later. Good god, the anticipation was killing him. "That's your phone! Get it, already! It's rung three times in the last half hour!"

"Geez! They'll call back! " Kris grumbled as he put down his guitar and searched around for his phone. He was almost afraid to hear from the school. "Here!" He called out as he found it under a pile of paper, with no idea how it'd gotten there. Pressing the button, he answered nervously , "This is Kris. Hello?"

"K..K....Kris?"

" _Mama_?"


	41. Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide...

**Chapter 41: Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide...**

"Kris! Oh my god, I can't believe I'm talking to you! I missed you so much. Did you miss me too? I can't believe--"

 _icantbelievebelievebelievebelievebelievebelieve..._

Kris blinked blearily as he stared at his guitar. His mother's voice buzzed in his ear, but he couldn't make out any actual words. A moment ago, he'd been picking out a song, a _half_ moment ago he'd been yelling at Adam about the damn phone and now? 

The phone -- it had his mother on it?

His mother was on the phone? 

His mother was talking to him? 

On the phone?

He knew he wasn't drunk and although he felt as queasy and his vision as bleary as that time he'd gotten that godawful food poisoning, it wasn't from bad sushi... He sat down hard on the mushroom chair, swallowing against the sourness in his throat, as the orange and olive-toned mushrooms blurred together in an uneasy sludge that turned his stomach. The blurriness... he must be getting sick; he couldn't have tears in his eyes. "No wonder Adam and Lane say those mushrooms are nauseating... They kinda are. Or is it me? Am I Alice?"

"Kris, are you okay?" 

Turning slowly, holding one hand to his head, Kris looked toward the door. Adam was standing there looking worried. And he wasn't sure who had asked the question, Adam or... his mother? His _mother_? 

"Kris?"

Again, he heard his name, but... "Is it real life? It's like talking to a person you thought was dead, but they weren't, only they weren't the dead ones, I was supposed to be dead to them and..."

"It's your mom, isn't it?" Adam asked gently. Kris looked what Lane would call gobsmacked. Damn himself, he'd made the wrong decision. He should have warned Kris better than by talking about Conway and his mother for the last few days. He'd thought it would be worse if Kris waited for a call that never came, but seeing the shock on Kris' face now... day-um, that had been a _stupid_ idea. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Well, he could beat himself up later, now Kris need his help. "It's not a fantasy. You didn't fall down the rabbit hole. It's your mother. You should say something to her, even if it's to tell her you'll call back later."

"I... yeah." Kris swallowed hard and then heard his voice squeak again, "Ma-ohm?"

"Kristopher? Are you okay? You sound sick. Why were you talking about being dead? Are you sick?"

"I'm..." Kris paused to stare up at Adam, who was handing him an uncapped bottle of water. "I...uh... need a drink. Of water." He took a long swallow of it, then handed the bottle back.

"I'm well aware of the fact that you have alcohol on occasion. It's no--"

"Like when I go to those gay bars and have to get drunk in order to sin? Isn't that what you said to me?" Kris blurted out, then bit his lip hard. He shouldn't talk to his mother that way, but... maybe he should. What should he do? 

"Actually, that was your father, but..." Kim stopped. Damn, this was a mess. Kris sounded so hurt and angry, even four years later which... made sense. That night, he'd said nothing. Had not defended himself. He'd probably, in that Kris way of his, run through in his mind all the things he wished he said. So. They were going to have the fight now that they should have then? Or would Kris pull back, as usual? 

"Is someone dead?" Kris asked, his words slow. He touched his bottom lip. It felt... swollen. 

"No, why--"

"Why else would you be calling? And how did you get this number anyway?"

"Cale. Cale finally gave it to me after months of me asking."

"Months? _Months?_ You've been asking for months and he didn't tell me?"

"For...for the same reason he wouldn't give it to me. He didn't trust me."

"Trust you how?" Kris asked indignantly, then frowned. Waitaminit. He stood up and began to pace, his steps hemmed in by his chair, his pile of music, his guitar and Adam, who was stepping back. "And why are you calling anyway? Did someone die? Did Dad put you up to this so he can yell at me some more? Is Dan getting married to some nice virgin girl from church and you want to rub my nose in the fact that I'm not invited? Or are you trying to get me to come back to Conway and play good ol' Christian boy myself?"

"I.... Well. _There's_ the answer about why Cale didn't trust me or Adam. You don't either. And..." Kim smiled. At least Kris was talking, even if his rush of words and questions and accusations were... different than the young man she'd known. Or thought she'd known. "Cale said that Adam's nickname for you is Hedgehog and I can see why!"

Swallowing hard, Kris shook his head. His mother sounded amused. Just like so many times in the past, when she would tease him. But, but the last time... He didn't understand what was happening. Maybe he was dreaming. "I don't get it. Last time... last time you talked to me, you said I was dead to you."

"You... You're right. I did say that. Which was wrong. Kris.." Kim began, then stopped as her throat clogged up with unshed tears. 

Seeing the unshed tears in Kris' eyes, Adam gently stroked his thumb along Kris' shoulder blade. Kris would be angry at himself for crying, but it would probably help. Later. He squeezed Kris' shoulder and urged, "Go on. Keep talking to her." 

Nodding, Kris decided to start over. "How... how did you get this number again?"

"Cale," Kim repeated patiently, hearing the confused tone in Kris' voice. He wasn't being random as he often could be in a conversation, he was circling back, trying to make sense out of it. Her call had truly thrown her son for a loop. Which said more about her than it did about him. It was a sad situation when hearing a mother's voice could so discombobulate a son. She had a lot of knee-time due to God. And a lot of explaining to do to Kris. "Cale wouldn't give it to me for months. I even asked his mother to tell him to give it to me and he still refused. He was...tough. Then Adam wouldn't--"

"You talked with Adam?" Kris glared and poked Adam in the chest. Feeling the solid warmth under his finger, he opened his hand and smoothed it along Adam's chest, needing the heat and strength even as he wanted to push at him too. "What the hell? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry. I made the wrong call. Honestly, I wasn't sure she was going to call back and I didn't want to get your hopes up for nothing. I didn't want you to get hurt again."

Kim winced as she heard Adam's calm explanation. 

"You were protecting me!" Kris glared and shook his shoulder free of Adam's hand. "I'm a _grown_ ass man. I don't need protection."

Adam said softly, "Everyone needs protection at times." 

"Adammmmm.... " Kris poked at Adam's arm. "That was an ass--"

"Kristopher! Language," Kim reprimanded automatically.

"Mama.... I'm sorry, but the least of my problems in life in the last four years has been using the word ass," Kris snapped, then winced. He probably shouldn't talk to his mother like that, but... "Adam, seriously-- you had no right." 

"I'm sorry. I made the wrong decision, for the right reasons. I didn't want you to be destroyed again. Or not even a little bit broken."

"I wasn't going to break from talking to my mother!"

"I was more afraid that you'd get your hopes up for nothing. I couldn't stand the thought of you listening for your phone, hoping and then... nothing."

"I could handle it!"

"But why should you?" Adam countered, focusing on keeping his voice soft, even though he was starting to get aggravated too. He reminded himself that Kris was angry and it would serve no purpose to raise his voice in return. Control, control, control. "I mean, that's what I was thinking. If I could explain--"

"You don't have to protect me," Kris repeated, even as he realized that protectiveness was an inherent part of Adam's nature. But still!

Shaking his head, Adam disagreed. "I do. I was the one who held you when you broke apart. I supported you putting yourself back together. Therefore, I'm entitled to protect you." 

"Enttiled?! According to what rule? The Adam rule?"

"Well, yeah." Adam smiled wryly, then carefully put his hand on Kris' shoulder again, feeling how Kris' first tensed, then leaned into the touch. His eyes looked... desperate and confused. Maybe... He'd keep talking until Kris could center himself, Adam decided. "Plus there's an old Chinese proverb that says if I save your life, I must care for you forever. Not that I saved your life, I know I didn't, _you_ did that, but still... doesn't what we experienced -- both us, caring for each other, knowing the deep dark places of fear --- doesn't that create a bond that...."

Kris stared at Adam as Adam, of course, went on and on and on, the blue eyes warm and calm, the soft voice washing over him, like the gentle rhythm of the waves once the high tide had passed. 

Kim put her hand over her heart. Kris had been... broken. Oh god, what had they done. Thank god, Adam had been there and that Lane girl Cale kept yapping on about was apparently a good friend to Kris too. But Adam was a sweet boy. Kris had picked well. When Adam finally paused, she interjected, "You should listen to him. When I was talking to him--"

"Don't lecture me about what I should do. And you better have been good to him. He's good people, the best." Kris narrowed his eyes. His mother better not have said anything obnoxious to Adam. 

Speaking gently, Kim agreed, "I know that. I know he has your best interests at heart, believe me. He wasn't going to let me through until I passed his tests. I swear he should work for the CIA, interrogatin' people."

Kris turned to face Adam. "You interrogated my mother?"

"Oh brother..." Adam sighed and leaned back against the wall. He needed support for his neck what with the whiplash Kris was giving him. 

"He was right to do that, son. I don't resent it."

"Okay, fine. But why are you calling? Now? After four years? Four years!" Kris put his knuckle into his mouth and bit down hard. He was not going to cry. No matter what Adam and Leila said, men did not cry. He had cried the once, that night in Adam's arms, and no matter what Adam said, it must've been a weak thing to do or Adam wouldn't still be protecting him. "Everything that happened..." 

Kim frowned. Kris should focus on the positive and move on. "You seem like you landed on your feet--"

"Landed on my...feet?" Kris grabbed the edge of the chair. At one point, all he'd owned was the clothes on his back, his guitar and his chair and he'd landed on his feet? 

"Yes. You're managed to find a nice...uh...boyfriend who has done well for himself and--"

"'Scuse me, Mom, but I'm not with Adam because he's rich. I'm not a gold-digging whore!"

Adam's eyes widened and he sucked in a breath. This was going to be a messy reconciliation. Especially since both Kris and apparently his mother had a tendency to want to ignore the puzzle pieces that couldn't be fit easily into the big picture. 

"Oh hell! I'm totally screwing this up. The way Adam was afraid I would," Kim admitted, remembering Adam's warnings. "I'm... ignoring the pain you suffered and that's wrong. So..." Kim paused and when Kris said nothing, she decided to keep talking. "Kris, Kris. Please listen. I'm calling to apologize. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I was wrong."

"About what?" Kris asked cautiously. 

"About everything. I.. I should've never... I should've never said those things, I should've never stood by while your father threw you out of the house."

"Mama... You acted like I'd killed a man. Y'all didn't throw me out of the house. You threw me _away_!" Kris spat out, "Like I was garbage. With maggots on it."

Kim gasped and then choked as tears flooded her eyes and flowed down her face. Gulping and gasping, she whispered, "I thought, I thought it was the right thing, but it was wrong. I never forgot about you. I thought about you every day. I said a prayer for you every night."

"That's... Tha'ts what Adam's mom said," Kris whispered.

"She... She must be a good mom." Kim sighed loudly, then sniffled. "Better than me. I screwed up in the worst way. I turned my back on my own child. I'll never forgive myself. I... I only hope you can." 

"I..." Kris swallowed or tried to. His mouth was dry. He sighed when Adam handed him the damn water bottle. God, he was being useless this morning -- he hadn't even thought to look for the water bottle. "I'll think about it."

Shocked at the stubbornness of the son that had always been so easygoing, Kim snapped, "It's your duty as a Christian to forgive!"

"I don't expect people to forgive _me_ ," Kris argued. He wasn't a kid living at home any more, with no life experience and no opinions of his own. No more. His mother needed to know that. "No one is entitled to forgiveness. They're entitled to us acting decent to begin with. And if we screw up, we get forgiven by the gift of grace. It's a _gift_ , not an entitlement. Believe me, there is little in this world we're entitled to. I learned that lesson when I was hungry!" 

"Oh my god..." Kim brushed the tears away from her eyes. Her baby had been hungry? Oh my. "I...I'm screwing this up. I know I am. I don't know how to act, what to do... I don't know what your life has been like since you left, although Cale and Adam told me that you've had some hard times. And maybe... All's I can say is that maybe you've had regrets, things you've done you wished you hadn't. Things you wish you could hit the rewind button and erase or do over..."

"Yeah..." Kris bit his lip, then said quickly, "Maybe. Maybe." 

"Well, then I'm asking you to forgive me. Maybe not now, but in the future. And... I'm hoping it won't take you four years."

Nodding, Kris stared at his phone. "Okay, mama. It... won't. I'll forgive you, but right now... I gotta go, I gotta go." He kept staring as Adam reached out and took it from him, murmuring a soft goodbye to his mother, then tossing the phone onto the pile of sheet music. 

"Hedgehog..." Adam murmured, carefully putting his arms around Kris and slowly pulling him close, unsure if Kris would accept the embrace or shove him away. "I'm sorry and..." He paused as he felt Kris burrow his face into Adam's neck and sniffle. He tightened his arms and rubbed his chin along the top of Kris' head, humming softly as he felt wetness on his neck. 

"This isn't... manly," Kris said abruptly, pulling his face back and rubbing it on Adam's shirt.

"You're talking to the wrong guy if you want reinforcement of outdated notions of masculinity." Adam rubbed his hands up and down Kris' back. "In other words, go ahead and cry."

"No." Kris shook his head and pushed away from Adam. "I'm not gonna. I'm... mad at you, you know!"

"I figured you might be."

"But you went ahead and did what you thought was right, didn't ya?"

"Should I have done what I thought was wrong?" Adam asked in confusion. 

"Don't confuse me!" Kris threw up his hands and began to stomp from the room.

"I'm not trying to confuse you. I'm just..." Reaching out, Adam encircled Kris' wrist with his hand. "Where are you going? We need to talk about your mom. Or finish our fight. If you're mad at me--"

"I have to go to work."

"Not for an hour! Or call in sick." Adam kept a firm grip on Kris' wrist, feeling the trembling in the muscles of Kris' arm under his fingers. "Don't run away. Talk to me, yell at me, even cry if you want to, but you need to--"

"No! Don't tell me what I need!" Kris twisted his arm, while glaring up at Adam. He swore under his breath as he saw the debate in Adam's eyes before he opened his hand and let Kris go. "Damn it, do you have to control everything?" 

"I let you go!"

"Because you decided to. Otherwise I'd still be trapped." Kris looked at his phone, resting on top of the sheet music. He had to get out of here. 

"What the _hell_..." Adam raised his voice, then forced himself to take a deep breath. Kris was not being rational right now. Too many emotions. He'd rather talk it out, but Kris might not. Oh hell, what was the right thing to do -- for Kris. He'd screwed up that last decision and--

"I need to go." Kris glared at Adam, not sure if he wanted Adam to make him stay or let him go. 

What was the right thing -- to make Kris stay and argue or to let him go and think about it by himself? Fuckity, fucky fuck, how was he supposed to know what to do? Finally, he said in honesty, "I'd rather you didn't, but if you feel you must, let me drive you--"

"Are you saying I can't drive myself? I'm a grown ass man!"

"I'm saying you're upset and probably shouldn't be driving, especially in traffic." Adam held up his index finger. "Remember one time you made me pull over because I was mad at something on Perez's blog?" 

"Yeah and then you wouldn't get out of the driver's seat, so we sat there for forty-five minutes while you and Laney screeched at each other on the phone!" Kris rolled his eyes, then froze. "Waitaminit. Did Lane know too?" 

 

"Laney!" Cale grinned, then grimaced when one of his friends make kissy faces. Honestly. He stood up and walked out of the bar. 

"We are in bloody deep hell, you wanker."

"Huh?" Cale licked nervous lips. "I guess we're in trouble? About Miz Allen?"

"Kris is murderously angry at us. He won't talk to me."

"Oh. He does that. Withdraws. He's like a possum."

"Dare I ask what that means?"

"Possums live in the woods. They're these white greyish sorta rodents--"

"Like a rat?"

"Well, bigger. And when danger happens they play dead. They just fall over and close their eyes and don't move. It's called playing possum. Kris can be like that."

"Ah." Lane nodded. "He can be quite quiet some times. When he's not being a hedgehog." She paused and giggled. "Poor Kris. Possum, hedgehog. We keep saying he's like a little woodland creature."

"Who does that make Adam? Snow White?"

"Well, he has had a predilection for surrounding himself with short people. Kris, Brad, Alisan, Tommy, Allison, Taylor, Isaac..." Lane grinned. "Ha. And he has the white skin and black hair. I absolutely know what I'm going to suggest for Halloween this year. I'm tired of the vampire costume. That is, if Kris is talking to me by then."

"Oh, he will. But we have to keep poking him -- that was my mistake when he left four years ago. I gave up too soon and he thought I didn't care."

"Excellent point." Lane tapped her fingers on the table. "From what Adam said, Kris got a little angry with his mum, then with Adam, but won't....show any real emotion now. He's ignoring our very existence, which is somewhat problematic given that he lives with Adam, but he's managing." 

"He's..." Cale rubbed his nose nervously, debating if he should spill the beans. But Kris needed his friends. He nodded, making up his mind. "I think part of it is that he's afraid of getting angry like his dad does -- like a crazy person. Hell, I'd be afraid of acting like that too."

"He didn't beat the boy, did he?"

"No. He just yelled loudly and stomped around. Which, when you're a little kid is scary enough. Then if Kris or Dan made a peep, he'd impose really bad punishments."

"Like what? Not talking to them?"

"Yeah." Cale sighed. "So that's why he hasn't returned my texts for the last two days. He's afraid of being too angry and he's givin' me the cold shoulder."

"Me too." Lane sighed. 

"How about Adam? He must know enough about Kris to know to poke him. Kris can't ignore him forever."

"Adam is impossible to ignore."

 

"You!" Kris slapped a coaster down on the bar and looked away from Adam, before stomping away towards the storeroom.

"Thank god," John whispered loudly. "He's so twitchy, he's dropped three bottles and two glasses. Tonight alone! The last two days... It's a good thing I'm not charging him for it or he'd be owing the bar money by now. Do something about him."

"You want me to de-twitchify him?" Adam asked with a smile. "I can do that."


	42. Baggage handling

**Chapter 42: Baggage handling**

Pick

Pick

Pick

Picking at his nail polish -- or what remained of his nail polish after three days of Kris ignoring him, Adam slowly walked back towards the storeroom. As a stream of soft southern-accented curse words slid out of the storeroom, he hesitated in front of the open door way. The confident answer he'd given John about de-twitchifying Kris had been nothing more than acting. His smirk was a facade to hide the reality that he had no idea what to do about Kris because Kris was giving him nothing. Nothing. His only hint was his memory of Kris bitching about how Cale had given up contacting him four years ago -- he was assuming that Kris _wanted_ to be poked and prodded until he got over his anger. But you know what they said about assuming... Damn it... What to do? 

Pick

Pick

Pick

Kick

Kick

Kick

Kicking at a box of bourbon on the floor, Kris groaned aloud and stared at his sneaker, wishing he could find a way to sneak out. Adam had seen him acting like a two year old pitching a tantrum. Because Adam was standing in the door. Because of course, Adam was following him. Because Adam was the most persistent person on the face of the earth which was... well, good. Because he knew he needed Adam to be pushy -- Cale's text about him playing possum was probably -- damn it all to hell-- correct. But still. Was Adam picking at his polish? Uh-oh, that meant Adam was nervous. Well, good. Except that... so was he. He kicked the box again. 

Well, Adam decided, when in doubt, ask the obvious. "Why are you doing that?"

"I'm all twitchy and flaily!" Kris burst out. At least here was a question he could answer. He hadn't known the answers to the questions Adam had been asking the last three days. "And I feel like my body is trying to come out of itself! Ack! I don't know how to explain it..." He grimaced and slapped his palm hard onto the side of a box once, twice, three times, then winced. That had kinda hurt. 

Adam bit his lip to keep from telling Kris to stop hurting his hands. He played the guitar for godssakes -- he should know better. 

"Aren't you gonna tell me not to hit my hands?" Kris demanded, looking down at the stacks of boxes around his feet. He was probably confusing Adam because he was confusing himself given that he really didn't have a leg to stand on, as Geoffrey had pointed out, but he did know that Adam bossed people around because he cared about them. Didn't Adam care about him any more?

"I'm not sure what to say any more," Adam admitted as he carefully navigated his way through what felt like a minefield, all while standing still. He felt like he'd been following Kris around for three days, trying to get him to talk with no luck, so maybe he just needed to stand still, stand his ground. "Do you _want_ me to tell you not to hit your hands?"

"Of course! Why are you being so... cautious?" Kris glared at Adam as he turned around to face him fully, kicking his heel at the box behind him. "Why are you out there?"

"Because if I'm standing in the doorway, then you can't run away from me!" Adam blurted out, realizing in that instant that he'd had enough, that mixed in with his guilt was anger. He leaned one shoulder against the door frame and pushed his leg out until it rested against the opposite side, feeling as though he needed to contain Kris. He had so much negative, anxious energy popping out of him, it wouldn't surprise him if Kris took off again. "Stop running away from me. And talk." 

"I haven't been..." Sighing, Kris looked fully at Adam for the first time in three days. Adam looked watchful, but calm. Unlike him. Then he stared into Adam's eyes and realized that it was just a mask. Adam was anything but calm. He was nervous and angry. Well, hell. Kris could relate. And then there was determination in the set of Adam's jaw. Okay, now Kris was really nervous. He wiped his damp hands on his shirt. Maybe he could avoid hearing what he was sure Adam was going to say if he kept avoiding it. "I haven't been running away." 

"I know you're pissed at me, but do me the courtesy of telling me the truth," Adam snapped impatiently. He didn't have much patience on an ordinary occasion, but after three days of the Kris cold shoulder treatment, he was ready to lose it. Whatever it was. "I cannot abide lying." 

"Oh, but you could lie by the sin of omission?" Kris challenged, slapping his palm on a box, welcoming the pain this time.

"I didn't not tell you in order to hurt you, but to help you!" Adam snapped defensively, then subsided. "You're right. My intentions were good, but the consequences weren't. I did what I thought was right, but it wasn't right for you. I'm sorry. I'll say it again if it makes any difference..." But at least Kris was talking to him now so maybe they could get somewhere.

"Why are you so damn calm?" Kris once again slapped at a box. "I want to scream and yell and you're just so... not aggravated! And you're the one with the temper." 

"Right. That's why _I'm_ the one with the nickname of Hedgehog," Adam drawled sarcastically in a deliberate tone, working to tamp down his annoyance. Three days of being contrite and careful was a definite test of his limits. 

Kris grunted and glared. Adam was obviously trying not to yell and why was that? Probably because once again, he didn't think Kris was man enough to handle it. Fuck. He stomped forward, intent upon leaving. He squeaked when Adam slammed the door closed, grabbed him by the upper arms and pushed him back into the room, then penned him up against a stack of boxes. 

"What the hell--" Kris wiggled against Adam, sliding his hands up Adam's arms to his shoulders, wondering if Adam realized that he wasn't trying too hard to get loose. Lord knows he was relieved that Adam wasn't letting him get loose. That must mean that Adam still cared. But he should probably pretend like he was insulted. Or something. He wiggled harder. That counted, right?

"Oh hell to the no. I'm done. You want me to be aggravated? Okay, _fine._ Fine!" Adam pressed into Kris, their legs tangling as Kris leaned into him, the mingled heat from their bodies raising his temperature even more. "I'm _aggravated_ that every time I come into a room you leave. I'm _aggravated_ that every time I try to talk to you, you glare at me, then ignore me. I'm _aggravated_ that you won't take Lane or Cale's calls. I'm _aggravated_ that you stomp around the house except when you realize I'm nearby and then you tiptoe past so I won't know you're there. I'm _aggravated_ that you hide yourself in the game room playing Wii bowling until you think I've gone to sleep. I'm _aggravated_ that you wait until you think I've gone to bed and then you go to bed in the guest bedroom--" Adam stopped to take a breath.

"Yeah. And then when you think I'm asleep, you come into that bed with me!" Kris accused, pushing his body into Adam's, needing to get close. He was so warm and he smelled so good. Why had he kept himself away the last three days? He was starting to forget what with Adam staring down at him with intense eyes and his lips.... "So damn pushy!"

"And I'm aggravated that you ignore the hand I put on your back or me whispering, 'Good night,' because you're pretending to be asleep and then when you think I'm asleep, you wrap yourself around me!" That moment was the only moment he relaxed, when he felt like they were still connected. 

_  
Click_

_Hearing the sound of the guest room door closing with deliberate softness, Adam slapped his hand on the tangle of sheets criss-crossing the bed. Kris was trying to sneak past their bedroom --_ their _bedroom -- to hide in the guest bedroom._

_Throwing his clothes into a pile somewhere towards the wall, Kris slid into the bed. The big empty bed. Cold sheets. Adam always made their bed nice and warm. Why had he thought he needed to sleep away from Adam? Oh yeah, he was pissed at him. Super pissed. Super duper pissed. Adam had to know he couldn't get away with pulling stunts like that. That's right. Kris sniffed, then buried his head in a pillow._

_"Kris?" Adam whispered as he stood over the bed in the guest room. When Kris did not move, Adam frowned. Kris was seriously asleep? He didn't believe that. He was just pretending to be asleep._

_Kris held his breath as he heard Adam swear while standing over him, half-wishing Adam would go away and half-wishing Adam would just jump on top of him and force them to fight it out. He wasn't sure how to fight it out or even if they should fight it out since Adam had already apologized -- a lot -- so he could just forgive him already, which probably meant that he really was a loser because he should probably still be angry or well, more angry than he was. And he was angry, but he was feeling more lonely and sad than angry. And he understood why Adam did what he did, but still, he had overstepped. Then again, Adam had been trying to pull back and not overstep since, although he'd been following Kris around trying to get him to talk, which was pushy but probably not overstepping, just...stepping. Although, he was angry and what the hell was Adam doing? Was he getting into this bed? Oh. He was. What next? Kris licked his lips in nervous anticipation._

_In the darkness of the room, Adam held his breath and slid the palm of his hand slowly on Kris' back, starting at the base of his spine and ending at his neck. He gently curled his hand around it and whispered, "Good night."_

_Kris held himself still, fighting the urge to shiver at Adam's touch, fighting the urge to just roll over and throw himself at Adam. He was angry, damn it. Really angry. Furious, in fact. Yes, he was. He should be. And he certainly wasn't going to listen to Geoffrey's advice that it was his job or something to see Adam's side. Or Lane's side. Or Cale's side. Or the fact that the three people he trusted most had all made the same choice to protect him by keeping an important fact from him. Because then he'd have to ask why they'd all made the same decision which might lead him to wonder if his father was right and that he wasn't really a grown ass man at all. And...He paused in his endless cycling and circling of thoughts as he felt Adam relax into the bed. Was he asleep?_

_Sighing with relief that Kris hadn't shoved his hand away, Adam relaxed for the first time since the phone call with Kris' mother. Maybe just being still and waiting for Kris was, while against his own predilections, a better choice? Well, he could use his control freak tendencies to control himself and just lie here quietly._

_Was Adam asleep? Kris wondered as the silence stretched out, his nerves taut as a bow string while Adam seemed to settle deeper into the bed. Maybe...He cautiously turned over and froze when Adam's hand fell onto the bed and somehow ended up under his neck. When Adam made no sound or movement, Kris sighed with relief and inched cautiously closer. He wasn't ready to talk to Adam, but he still wanted him._

_Thank god for theater training, Adam thought as he held himself still but not too still, waiting and hoping as Kris slowly moved toward him. For the love of gods, how slowly could one man move? No, no, patience... he told himself. Concentrate on breathing normally, not too slowly, not too fast. No sudden moves. Like... taming a wild creature. His hedgehog. He fought the urge to smile._

_Damn, he was breathing as hard as if they'd just had major sex. Kris took a shallow breath as he slid across the sheet that final inch and gently, carefully pressed his body against Adam's side. He bit his lip as Adam seemed to relax and turn slightly toward him which... was just like he did every night. So he was asleep. Kris let out the breath he'd been holding and wrapped his arm and leg around Adam's body and held on. This was where he belonged._

__

"You're aggravated by that?" Kris gasped, curling his hand around the edge of a box of vodka next to them and holding on. "Are you... Are you gonna kick me out?"

"What?" Momentarily stricken into silence by confusion, Adam looked down into Kris' worried brown eyes trying to understand. Seeing anxiety there, Adam automatically wrapped his arms around Kris and hugged him tightly. He smiled with his own relief as he felt Kris melt into him and then squeeze him back just as hard. "Now what did you say?"

"Are you gonna kick me out? If you don't want me to..."

"I came into bed with you! I've been following you around for the last few days! Of course I want you..." Adam paused while he freed one hand to tip Kris' face up to look into his eyes. He saw the hope mixed with fear and confusion and a touch of self-loathing, while wondering why in the world Kris would think he'd be kicked out. That made no sense -- except it did. 

Adam hurried to say, "Oh. Baby, I'm not your parents. I'm not going to kick you out because we had a fight. Especially when it wasn't really a fight. It was you getting rightfully mad at me for being presumptuous and bossy. Back in the day, I had guys dump me because of it and here I went and did it again with something as critical as your mother contacting you. I thought I'd finally pushed you too far with my bossiness. I...was afraid you were going to leave because I was so damn bossy about what was right for you." His rush of words stopped abruptly. He was once again talking too much, but when was Kris going to talk? "Well, anyway, this is not about me, so talk!"

"I don't know..." Kris murmured, distracted by the feel of Adam's thigh against his hip and the feel of his bulge against his belly. Why hadn't he turned over to Adam and bed and used sex to figure this out? Adam Fucking Lambert had come into bed with him, sought him out and geez! No wonder Adam, Cale and Lane thought he needed protection! He was an idiot! Especially since Adam had just ordered him to talk -- that meant they were getting back to normal.

"If you want to yell at me, yell at me. Just talk to me or I'll make you talk to me because I'm so damn sick of -Oh!" Adam yelped as Kris abruptly raised his head and kissed him hard and bit his bottom lip.

"You. Can't. Make. Me. Talk!" Kris hissed out the words in between kissing and biting at Adam's lips and pulling Adam closer to him. Adam had started to get bossy again -- what a relief. "You can't."

His brain having stopped the more complex functions the second Kris' mouth had touched his, it took Adam some moments to realize that Kris was giving him a way in. Literally, a way in, given the way Kris had somehow managed to sit his ass on a box and was wrapping his legs around Adam's hips to pull him in. He got it -- he needed to get close too. Skin. Skin would be good. Skin would be excellent. Keeping their mouths fused in a heated kiss, Adam reached for the button on Kris' jeans.

"I'm so mad at you..." Kris growled as Adam's fingers made quick work of his jeans, shoving them down. "So fucking mad..." His mouth needed something, he decided and rose up to help Adam pull his jeans down and bite at Adam's neck. 

"Are you really?" Adam challenged as he slid his hands around Kris' backside and squeezed. "Right. That's why you're sucking on my neck and wiggling your ass into my hands."

"Bitch!" Kris scraped his teeth along Adam's collarbone. God, he could just eat him up and -- what was Adam doing, why was he pulling back? He reached out with needy hands, pulling at Adam's bare arms... Oooh, bare arms. 

"That's right. I'm the bitch who kept a secret from you for your own good." Adam grinned as he slid to his knees. "So show me my place. Go ahead, fuck my face."

"I..what?" Kris gaped in shock as Adam bent forward and pulled Kris' hips toward him at the same time, swiftly sucking Kris' cock into his hot mouth and taking him to the edge within moments. "I...you..." Kris groaned and began thrusting into the sucking wetness of Adam's mouth, watching those lips encircle him. "God, you have the hottest damn mouth I've ever seen... Mine..." Kris gritted out, forgetting momentarily that they'd been fighting, that they were in a storeroom and that Adam was probably up to something.

Kris was going to talk, Adam thought with determination, feeling the tightening of Kris' thigh muscles under his hands. He slid his mouth back up, giving a long lick and pulled free, smiling when Kris' hands moved into his hair and tried to push him back. "Tell me what you want or I'll keep you on the edge...just...like...this..." Adam taunted as his fingers rubbed the spot under the head of Kris' cock.

"I don't know!" Kris cried out in frustration. "Honestly, I don't, that's--" He broke off as Adam cupped his balls with one hand and licked the head of his cock. Oh god, too much and what was Adam's question again? 

"Are you mad at us protecting you or are you mad that we think you need protection?" Adam flung the question out and seeing the widening of Kris' eyes and the shocked look on his face, realized that he had hit the jackpot. Speaking of which, he bent his head and gave a long loud swipe of his tongue across the head of Kris' cock, smiling when Kris jerked, then tried to shove himself into Adam's mouth. Adam shook his head and pulled back. "Oh no. I'm a bitch, remember? Answer me first. Are you mad about the protection or is it about you thinking we think less of you for needing it?" 

Kris gasped and groaned, trying to respond like a man who could actually string sentences together. "Geoffrey said the same thing to me this morning..."

Well, Geoffrey had his uses, Adam thought as he licked a streak up the front of Kris' balls. Biting Kris' thigh and smiling at Kris' responsive groan at the little pain, Adam whispered in a low voice, "So is this about male ego?"

"I...don't know... I really don't," Kris protested, knowing that Adam had little patience with male ego. He groaned as Adam's hands abruptly stopped moving. God, what a bitch. "Okay, okay, probably."

"Newsflash, hedgehog." Adam smiled as he resumed pumping Kris' cock. "I have it on good authority -- my hands right now -- that you are indeed a man. Show me, come for me."

"I'll come when I want to!" Kris asserted, then spoiled his protest by groaning and thrusting and coming seconds later. Gulping as he watched Adam slowly swipe his tongue over his lips, Kris exclaimed, "I came because I wanted to, you know."

"I know." Adam nodded as he carefully licked Kris' dick clean, enjoying the tiny aftershocks he felt against his mouth. "And I also know we've probably been in here way too long. John's gonna have a few choice comments."

"Oh, like you care," Kris scoffed, pushing Adam's hands aside as he began pulling Kris' jeans back up. "I'm a big boy. I can take care of myself."

"I thought you were a grown ass man?" Adam asked, sighing with regret as Kris hauled his jeans over his ass. Some other time. 

Correctly interpreting the desire on Adam's face, Kris flung his arms around Adam's shoulders and pressed close. "But you..." Kris tried to wiggle against Adam's dick, but even he knew his movements weren't sexy. Just... jerky, awkward. No wonder Adam wasn't interested. 

"This wasn't about what I needed. And anyway, even if it was, you gave me what I needed when you started talking to me." 

"But..." Kris stared at the base of Adam's neck rather than his eyes. Watching the pulse pound beneath the skin, Kris forced himself to breathe slowly. Geoffrey had asked him an important question just this morning, when he'd commented that maybe Kris wasn't so mad at being protected as that people felt he needed protection. Were Geoffrey and Adam right? And how was he going to figure it out without talking about it? What had he been thinking? Why had he been acting like that? He groaned and rested his forehead against Adam's shoulder.

"This cold shoulder business --" Adam began. He wasn't going to put up with that again. 

"Which is exactly what my father used to do!" Kris realized that Cale's other text had been right too. "Oh god,I hated that shit. It made me so anxious and scared. It's...manipulative and controlling. Now, I'm the one who's sorry! It's a punishment that really hurts. Oh god, I was acting like my father."

Adam blinked in surprise. "That was... insightful."

"Cale..." Kris blushed. "Sometimes an old friend who knows you super well can be an advantage. He pointed stuff out to me. I read what he said -- you know, 'cause when I left Conway, he did contact me and I didn't look and thought he'd blown me off, but he hadn't, so I wasn't gonna make that mistake again and..." He paused to take a breath and then finished, "Well, anyway, he does know something. Sometimes. Maybe."

"Maybe you could let him know that," Adam suggested carefully. "You know, if you want..."

"But..."

"Just say it, whatever it is!"

Biting down into Adam's lip, Kris shuddered as he jerkily pushed his hips against Adam's thigh, trying but failing to find a rhythm. "Ugh, I'm so frustrated! It's like I can't do anything right. I've been dropping glasses and napkins all over and now..."

"You can't even hump my leg right?" Adam teased.

"Yeah, how pathetic is that?" Kris smiled as he ran his hands over Adam's arms and shoulders, pressing and smoothing, his movements still awkward as he both wanted to get closer and yet wanted to push... not away, but... push. "I just feel like there's this electrical charge under my skin and it's making me jumpy. And I need to find some way to get rid of it."

"You need an outlet?" Adam's hands spread wide on Kris' back, feeling the tremors under the skin.

Kris leaned forward and scraped his teeth along Adam's collarbone, blushing when Adam hissed in a breath and he pulled back to see red marks on Adam's fair skin. Maybe... sex right now wasn't the best idea. "Exactly."

"If you were me and I were you, you'd be telling me to go swimming or jogging," Adam observed.

"But that's too..." Kris lifted his arm and moved it in a slow waving motion. "Too calm, too measured, ya know? I feel like just... jumping or stomping... Racquetball? A batting cage? Touch football?"

"With me? Surely,you jest. But I have an idea. Let's go." Adam grabbed Kris' hand and pulled him out of the storeroom and into the bar. 

"How's it goin'?" John called out, grinning as Adam hauled Kris through the room. 

"Excuse him. I'm taking him away from all this," Adam called out as they hurried by.

"Thank god!" A small chorus of voices called out. 

"Was I that bad?" Kris asked over his shoulder.

"Yes!"

 

"Ohmigod, I'm gonna suck at this! You know I can't dance!" Kris complained before taking a long gulp from his bottle of beer. 

"First of all, yes, you can. Secondly, look at the dance floor. Are you seeing great technical skill out there?" Adam pointed toward the square in the center of the club. 

Kris finished off his beer, plunked the bottle down on the bar and squinted in the general direction of the dance floor. Between the hazy atmosphere and flashing, multi-colored lights, he couldn't see much. "I see people..."

" _Live_ people, you'll notice."

"Seriously? A Sixth Sense reference?"

"Well, you're not much bigger than Haley Joel Osment at the time -- how old was he? Eight or nine? So one can see how I might get confused..." Adam smirked, then grunted when Kris stepped on his toes. "So, what kind of live people are you seeing?"

"Well, they look more like they're jumping around and waving their arms... Oh." Kris grinned and leaned back against Adam. He smiled again when Adam's arm came up and hugged him close. "So, my kind of dancing. No rhythm or skill required. How did you know about this place?"

"Brad. Let's go expend some of that nervous energy!" Adam finished off his drink and pulled Kris onto the dance floor. 

 

"I think I'm too exhausted to move...." Kris whined as Adam pulled his car into the garage hours later. He turned in his seat to smile at Adam, keeping his hand over Adam's bulge and stroking it as he'd done the entire way home. It had been a good way to keep Adam from talking more about the fight and well, hell, why wouldn't he want to grope the glambulge? He might do stupid things sometimes, but he wasn't stupid stupid.

"You'd better not be!" Adam shook his head as he parked the car and the garage door went down behind them. Kris had been teasing him ever since they'd left the club. "I'd hate to have to stop calling you hedgehog and start calling you cocktease." Getting out of the car, he stood and waited for Kris, laughing when Kris stayed stubbornly seated, shaking his head. Kris had been acting like he wanted to be manhandled around all night and apparently the theme was still in force. 

Waiting eagerly, Kris grinned as Adam melodramatically flung open his car door and hauled him out, managing to stumble and fall into Adam's arms. He wiggled into the front of Adam's body as Adam slammed the car door and tried to urge him out of the garage."I'm all... " Kris giggled, absently wondering if he was really that drunk or if the drinks combined with the twitchy flailing on and off the dance floor plus anxiety and relief had made him... "Wlopsy... Flopsy, Mopsy, and Cottontail!" 

"I'll vote for Cottontail." Adam laughed as he squeezed Kris' ass in both hands and Kris wiggled against him. "I like your tail."

"I like that you like my tail, but I'm still Flopsy. Did you ever see that Easter claymation show with the bunny named Irontail? Probably not, since you're Jewish, but that was kinda twisted. Anyway, that's you! Iron..." Kris angled his hips up to try and rub against Adam's package. "Iron not tail, Ironcock! That's it. What are you gonna do with Flopsy, IronCock?"

Smiling, Adam turned Kris around and gently pushed him down on the hood of the car. "Just bend over and you'll find out."


	43. Tying ends up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 43: Tying ends up**

"You are not seriously thinking you're gonna wear those cock corset pants on tour?" Kris planted his hands on his hips and shook his head. He winced when he realized everyone in the designer's showroom had stopped to stare once the word, 'cock' had left his mouth. Great. _Great_ practice for how to behave when his mother arrived. 

"Why not?" Adam shrugged and fingered the leather of a pair of pants the designer had brought out for them to try on for tour gear. "I like them and so do you."

"At _home_!" Kris protested. 

Isaac shook his head. "He wears cock corset pants at home?" 

"Of course he does. You had to ask?" Lane rolled her eyes. 

"Of course I do. Kris likes them." Adam shrugged again. This stupid argument would keep Kris from foaming at the mouth while waiting for his mother to arrive with Cale later today. 

"But that's the point!" Kris tried to explain again.

"I thought the _point_ was what was _in_ the cock corset?" Tommy smirked.

"One might think so," Lane began. "But--" 

"But I don't want people looking at you..." Kris waved his hands in the general direction of Adam's crotch. "Down there!"

"Well, if that's what you want and if you read the fan sites, then you'd know you'd better get him a real cock corset, because people look," Lane advised.

"Oh, yeah." Isaac nodded with a grin in Adam's direction. "You need to get him one of those chastity devices that keep you from getting hard by constricting around your dick?" 

"What?" Camilla asked, ignoring Adam's groan. "Educate me."

Lane nodded. "It's a tube that goes around the cock and if a man gets hard, it constricts."

"Like a dick tourniquet?" Cam asked. "Well, if Adam's a bad boy, Kris could use the laces the same way, right?"

"Good point, Cam!" Kris agreed, staring at Adam's crotch.

"Uh, Kris?" Adam tilted Kris' chin up. "Normally, I'd be thrilled that you're staring at my cock, but after all this talk about a dick tourniquet..." 

"Are you scared? You should be! Heheheh..." Kris tried his best at an evil laugh, then stopped to pout when everyone burst out laughing. He shrugged. "Okay, I can't do evil very well."

"At all! You're too cuuuuuuuute..." Lane cooed, laughing as Kris swiped at her. 

"I know you're trying to distract me from my mother getting here later," Kris whispered as he poked Lane in the ribs with his elbow. "You and Adam."

"And you know it, we know it, but you're letting us, so what's your point?" 

"Oh, Krissssss...." Adam sing-songed. "Johnny here has your pants. Leather!"

"I am not wearing leather pants on stage!" Kris protested, backing away. "I didn't agree to that." 

 

_  
"Don't be a stubborn fool. Agree to it, already!" Hannah exclaimed impatiently, poking her finger at the contract so hard Kris thought she was going to poke a hole in the paper. "Isn't this what you wanted -- to be a working musician?"_

_"I have to agree," Geoffrey interjected. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't you emigrate out here in order to prove you could make it? I realize playing electric bass wasn't your initial goal, but it is an opportunity."_

_"Getting a gig with my boyfriend for his tour isn't exactly proof of my musical abilities." Kris crossed his arms over his chest and looked out the window, past Geoffrey's shoulder. He hadn't emigrated out here with a goal so much as run away from home. And no one would probably ever believe it, but he hadn't started playing the electric bass with Tommy on the off-chance that someday Adam would hire him to do so; it had just seemed like fun to learn that instrument, especially with a friend. "Some people would say it's more proof of my abilities to handle another instrument."_

_Geoffrey shook his head, while Hannah challenged, "And why do you give a flying fig about what_ some people _would say?"_

 _"Now, Hannah..." Geoffrey tsked. "I have a strong suspicion that the_ some people _Kris is concerned about are his parents."_

_"For the love of god!" Hannah threw up her hands. Seeing the pinched look on Kris' face, she remembered that Kris was hoping his mother was going to have enough courage to stand up to his father and come out here for a visit. She smiled slightly and what she hoped was encouragingly, shook her head, touched Kris' arm and softened her tone. "What is that Dr. Seuss quote that Adam always uses -- the people who matter won't mind and the people who mind, don't matter. Sad to say, Kris, but that's true of your parents as well. I mean, I'm really _truly_ sad to say so, but your parents gave up the right to have their opinion matter to you when they threw you out."_

_Kris winced. Hannah was blunt, Hannah was always blunt. He forced himself to consider what he knew of her character before he reacted. Hannah wasn't trying to hurt with her honesty, but to move him forward. As always. This time she spoke a truth again. A hard truth, though. Seemed like all of Hannah's truths were hard ones. Geoffrey's too. Then again, she and Geoffrey had never led him wrong. Seeing clearly probably did lead a person to choosing the right path. He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand while gripping his knee with the other. "I suppose...I was being prideful and that's a sin, to be sure. Truth is, I was going to go on tour with him anyway and it's better to go as a paid musician than an assistant, right?"_

_"Exactly," Hannah agreed quickly._

_Geoffrey nodded. "And it's not like you'll slack off because Adam's your boyfriend. I would bet cash money, as you Yanks say, that you'll work even harder."_

_"Yeah." Kris agreed, staring at Geoffrey as he shoved the contract towards him. "I wouldn't want anyone to think I got this gig by the time I spent on my knees, rather than by practicing the guitar."_

_"Well!" Hannah laughed. "Your turn to be blunt."_

_"And I'm sure you know that if anyone thought that, it would not only hurt your reputation, but Adam's," Geoffrey commented, watching as Hannah handed Kris a pen for his signature._

_"I get it." Kris firmed his mouth. He got it. Geoffrey was telling him not to screw up, to prove that Adam's faith in him was well-founded. He got it. He took the pen and signed his name. As he finished writing the "n" in his last name, he felt the weight lift off his shoulders and grinned. "That feels...right. I made the right decision."_

_"I knew it was the right decision," Adam announced smugly from the corner of the office where he'd been sitting all along. He should get an award or at least a reward for staying silent and letting the three of them battle it out. He really should. "You should listen to me on occasion."_

_"One of these days..." Kris laughed and stood up as Adam approached him. "You're gonna be wrong."_

_"Oh, I"m often wrong. Just not about you." Adam smiled and pulled Kris in for a hug. "The day we met was the day everything started to go right for me." He rubbed his chin against Kris' hair and smiled at Geoffrey and Hannah, glad he'd followed Geoffrey's advice and allowed him and Hannah to argue for him with Kris on a purely business basis. He'd gotten what he wanted and he would make sure Kris got what he wanted too._

__

 

"Your leather pants -- who says they're for the tour? I bought them for you for my birthday." Adam wiggled his eyebrows and then grinned when Kris fell against him, giggling.

"But your birthday is months ago. Mine is the one coming up," Kris pointed out.

"Oh something will come up for your birthday. In those pants, I'd bet.." Adam leered and pinched Kris' butt, laughing when Kris squeaked loudly. "Well, that is if it _can_ come up..." 

"That means..." Lane laughed. "They're really tight. And if they're for home use, they probably won't have stars and glitter..." She held up her hand. "Oh wait. Given Kris' predilection for glitter--"

"Mine?!" Kris exclaimed. 

Tommy poked Kris in the shoulder with his finger. "Yeah, yours. How many times did the tour laundry find tubes of edible glitter in your jeans pocket?" 

Blushing, Kris tried to change the subject. "Besides, I don't know how the cock corset pants fit into your tour idea about stars and astrology and the star something or other!" He was loosey goosey about a lot of stuff, but highlighting Adam's crotch for public consumption was not one of them. "Futuristic, last I knew. Isn't _any_ corset old-fashioned?" 

Adam shook his head. "Hey, there is nothing new in fashion. They wore platforms shoes in the middle ages and in New Orleans in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries to rise above the muck in the streets and yet people thought they were seeing something new in the 1970s, so...."

"Oh god, a fashion lecture..." Tommy moaned. He didn't give a crap what they wore. He was just thrilled that he was playing lead guitar on this tour. Speaking of which, "Can we just have a fitting? I need to get back to practice." He had something to prove too. 

"Yeah, sure, Tommy," Adam said absently. He wasn't done yet proving his point. "Now with futuristic fashion, maybe it's like steampunk -- old is new and new is old."

"That means you're going to do whatever you want and convince people it fits in with your vision," Lane surmised. 

"I have a theme!" Adam asserted, then called out to the designer, who he thought might have been hiding behind a curtain. Like he was afraid of them. That was weird. He stepped forward to part the curtains and asked, "Now, where are the headpieces?"

"Headpieces?" Everyone echoed. 

"Yeah," Adam called out over his shoulder as the designer handed over two cases. "They look like stars and they'll light up --" He broke off when everyone exploded.

"Fire!" Tommy cried out.

"Oh no! Adam, I have a kid, I can't--" Isaac began.

"We are not having fireworks come out of our heads!" Kris argued. 

"Ohmigod, we're all gonna die!" Tommy moaned. "Die. Dead. Totally dead. In some horrible fiery death! That will be up on YouTube with thousands of views in minutes!"

"Oh, toughen up, horror boy!" Lane snapped with a roll of her eyes. 

"But I like fake horror, not real stuff," Tommy retorted. "Speaking of which, aren't you and Leila supposed to go soon and pick up your no-boyfriend and Hedgehog's mom?"

 

"I'm a wreck," Kim Allen complained as she and Cale walked through LAX. "I picked the wrong shirt. I know it. It's too colorful. Why didn't you tell me to wear black?"

"I really know nothing about fashion, Miz Allen," Cale responded patiently or with long practice, since Kris' mom had been babbling nervously ever since he'd picked her up to go to the airport. Hours ago. "Besides I see plenty of people in colors."

"And my hair. It's too... pouffy. I poufed it up thinking the plane ride was going to de-poof it and it didn't, so I probably look like a rube. With big hair."

"We are rubes," Cale argued. "We're not big city folks."

"But I want to fit in. Adam's mother is going to meet us and I don't want her thinking I'm from Petticoat Junction!"

"Yeah, that train left the station four years ago..." Cale muttered under his breath, then whistled silently when Mrs. Allen gave him a suspicious look. Yeah, the smell of Conway's small town shit had left the station at the Junction years ago, about when Lane had first visited and reported back. And then there was the little matter of Miz Allen rejecting her own son. So yeah, Miz Lambert might have some ideas running around in her head already. "Wait. You talked with her before, right?" 

"Yes." Kim took a deep breath and then exhaled it as she recalled that initial conversation. When her phone had rung and it was Adam's mother, her heart had pounded with anxiety, half-expecting to be told that she was the world's worst mother. Leila had been forthcoming with advice that Kris needed his mother to take the step of coming out to visit in order to reconcile. She'd also suggested that Kim would want to meet what Cale referred to as Kris' 'LA family' in a tone that while politely friendly, had been cautious and a little reserved. It was only then that Kim had fully realized that she had to prove herself not only to Kris, but to Kris' 'LA family,' a family of people who were apparently quite protective. "She was...helpful."

"You talked with her about Mr. Allen, right? Did she have any ideas?"

"I know you hate him, Cale," Kim said abruptly, looking up at him. He shrugged, she sighed. "She gave me a number to call for that PFLAG organization and that was good. I found other mothers in the same position -- where our husbands don't want to have anything to do with our gay sons and all." Kim pressed her lips together and shook her head. She and Neal had an appointment with the pastor set for after her return from this trip. She was nervous about it, but first things first. Priorities. She was going to see her son again.

"There they are!" Cale waved and laughed excitedly. "Lane is--"

"The tall cool blonde with the excited smile." Kim smiled herself. Cale had spent the entire flight talking about this Lane to the point where she could hardly get in a word edgewise. But uh-oh, the lady with her was, had to be Adam's mom. "You lied, Cale! Adam's mom is glamorous. Oh no, I think my stomach hurts." 

 

"You're a nervous wreck." Adam stroked Kris' back as they sat next to each other on the couch and waited for their mothers to arrive. 

"No... Okay, I am." Kris laughed nervously and then curled into Adam's side. "I don't know what to do."

"I know a good stress reliever." Adam leered, bending down to nibble on Kris' neck. 

"Oh yeah..." Kris murmured as Adam's mouth moved back over his jaw while his fingers teased Kris' nipple. Arching into Adam's touch and opening his mouth for Adam's kiss, Kris moaned and slid his leg over Adam's thigh, moving to straddle him and rub and... "Oh no! I can't have a hard on when my mother is on her way here?"

"Huh?" Adam blinked. "Why not? I can take care of it before she gets here and --"

Jumping to his feet, Kris shook his head. "No. I... can't. I don't think I can have sex at all while she's staying here with us."

"Oh, this is gonna be a fun visit..." Adam muttered under his breath, then looked up with a bright smile. "Okay, so no fun times right now. What do you want to do while we wait?"

 

"So why are you picking us up again?" Kim asked, patting her hair nervously. Kris had explained it to her, but Neil had been yelling at her from outside the locked door of the bathroom, so she didn't really remember. 

Lane smiled and touched Mrs. Allen's arm before leaving with Cale. "Kris didn't want to see you for the first time in four years in public. He wanted it to be in private."

Leila nodded as she led the way towards the parking garage. "And if Adam had come, there is always the chance the paps could have been following him. That's something to be avoided." She kept smiling even as she considered Adam's caution that the media couldn't know about this potential reconciliation in case it didn't actually happen. If the eternal optimist that was Adam showed such caution, she would be careful too. "So...how did your husband take your decision to come out here and see Kris, if I might ask?"

"Not well." Kim shuddered, then squared her shoulders. "But a mother's gotta do what a mother's gotta do. Even if it means no doubt having a fight with her husband." She laughed nervously. "Or her son. I don't think Kris has quite forgiven me yet. I actually don't know that I know him any more or how to handle him," she confessed. "Then again, maybe I never did."

Nodding slowly, Leila agreed, "I think you did, but not all of him. I don't know if he's made the leap of faith to forgiveness either, but..." She paused as they reached their car and then added, "I want you to know that Kris is a fine young man. He's loving and kind. A blessing to Adam and to all of us. You did a good job raising him." 

"I... thank you!" Kim smiled in relief. Leila Lambert was very nice, not the glamorous snob Neal had insisted she was going to be. "That's all any mother would hope for."

"Absolutely," Leila agreed. "As for forgiving you, I'm sure if you are sincere and listen with an open heart, he'll respond in kind."

"Good advice. I'll work hard on remembering it," Kim whispered as she looked into Leila's encouraging eyes. "I'm worried about fighting with him. We never really fought and I hear his nickname out here is Hedgehog, so I guess he's gotten prickly. I don't know how to handle my son if he's like that."

Leila laughed. "Patience. The key with Kris in hedgehog mode is being patient." 

 

 

Kris paced back and forth in the living room. "Thing is... I can bet my mother and I are gonna have an argument. I don't know how to fight with her. Hell, I don't know how to fight with you! I don't know how to fight with someone when you love them."

"Neither do I," Adam agreed. When Kris looked at him in surprise, Adam shrugged. "Not really. My parents -- I never really saw them fighting and working it out. They never really fought and I thought everything was good, then I'm on that cruise ship and hearing that they're getting a divorce. I never even knew anything was wrong. I never saw it coming."

Kris nodded slowly. That was one of Adam's few fears -- of being blindsided. An understandable fear given his past history. Hell. Well, he would make damn certain it never happened. "I won't do that with you. I... I won't do the withdrawal shit again."

"Good." Adam exhaled with relief. "And I won't keep secrets from you for your own good. You feel like it, I mean that _I_ was presumptuous and condescending. I get that now. I won't do it again. I promise -- What?"

Kris giggled at the earnest look on Adam's face. "I know you mean it, but you're so damn protective by nature -- it's your default -- I know you'll do it again."

"Wow. Once again, ye of little faith!" Adam frowned. "I can do it. I have enough control... Stop it!" Adam demanded, his lips quirking as he watched Kris fall back on the couch and laugh. "I can have control..." He pulled Kris onto his lap and cupped his ass to pull him up close.

"Adammmm..." Kris warned, even as he melted into Adam's embrace. "I told you--"

"No sex. Just kissing. I can control myself. Can you?" Adam arched an eyebrow and slid his hands up, his left curling around the back of Kris' neck while his right hand circled Kris' torso and skimmed over his nipples.

"I thought you were going to kiss me?" Kris complained, feeling his heart thud against Adam's hand.

"Just wondering if you can control _yourself_...Mmmph!" Adam smiled against Kris' lips as Kris swooped in and took Adam's lips in soft kiss. 

Tilting his head as the warmth sparked into a small fire, Kris sighed into Adam's mouth as Adam took over. That's what he needed, to just feel... loved, wanted, needed. He just needed to always remember that. 

"Honestly..." Adam whispered as he kissed his way across Kris' cheek to gently bite his earlobe. "I could do this all day with you."

"Me too. And I'd forget why I was mad at you, you're so good at this..." Kris said breathlessly as Adam once again took his mouth in a deep kiss that made his head spin. He pulled back abruptly. "How about...I have an idea." Kris paused, then smiled nervously. "I got it. I think. Three strikes."

"Three strikes?"

"Yeah, three strikes, you're out. You ask me three times what's wrong and if I don't tell you with three asks, then you get to send me out of the game."

"Okay, not getting the baseball analogy. How do I send you out of the game?"

"That means... how about..." Kris nodded and slid his fingertips inside the waistband of Adam's jeans. "You do whatever it takes to get me to talk. You have your ways..." 

"Ah. I get to fuck it out of you."

"That's an idea." Kris shrugged nonchalantly. 

Adam buried his smile in the curve of Kris' neck. "So you want to use sex to resolve our disagreements?"

"What do you think about that idea?" Kris closed his eyes and wiggled closer to Adam's solid warmth. Burying his face in Adam's neck, he unconsciously began humming.

Adam smiled as he recognized that Kris was humming the tune to _All You Need Is Love_. "I think... you're crazy if you think the Beatles were the greatest rock band ever..."

"Whaaaa...What?!" Kris shoved at Adam's chest. "Are you out of your flippin' mind? I swear, Adam, sometimes I don't think you have the brains God gave a goose!"

"Oh, are we having a disagreement?" Adam bent his head and kissed Kris' mouth. "So is this where we use sex to resolve our fights?"

"You..." Kris laughed, then froze as he heard the front door open. "Adam."

"They're here--"

"Ohmigod, my mother's here!" Kris froze, staring at Adam with wide eyes as Adam gently disentangled Kris from his lap and pushed him to a standing position. "I should..."

"Go." Adam gave Kris a small push and when he didn't move, wrapped his arm around Kris' shoulder and urged him out of the room. They moved quickly towards the foyer, their mothers' voices wafting toward them, soft enough that Adam could hear Kris' harsh, anxious breathing,then a loud gasp as they walked under the archway and Kris saw his mother for the first time in four years. He gave Kris a squeeze and held his breath.

"My..." Kris began, then stopped. This was surreal. His mother was standing in their foyer. His and Adam's foyer. In California. Looking like she'd seen a ghost. Which was him. Only he was alive. Or he would be if he could breathe again. He choked when Adam gave him a slap on the back.

"Breathe!" Adam ordered. "Breathe and go." 

"Krissy?" Kim shrieked. She blinked rapidly as tears filled her eyes. Her baby looked all grown up. 

"Mama?" Kris whispered, his voice soft as they rushed toward each other and met in the middle.


	44. Whack a mole

**Chapter 44: Whack a Mole**

After what felt like forever, but wasn't long enough, Kris patted his mother's back and pulled away. Seeing the tears streaming down her face, he reached out to brush them away, then jumped when Leila shoved a tissue in his hand. He had forgotten anyone else was there. Probably because for once Adam was absolutely silent and still, except that he was moving back. Which he was probably doing to give them space. But... Aaack, too much was going on in his head!

"Wipe your face, Krissy," Kim ordered, taking another tissue from Leila to wipe his tears away. "We're quite the messy pair."

"I'm not.." Kris touched his face and blushed. He had cried too. Ridiculous. Men shouldn't cry. 

"You're just like me! Always have been." Kim half-laughed and half-hiccupped through her tears. This Kris she knew and understood. "You're emotional."

"No, I'm not," Kris said automatically, tensing, waiting for his father to make some nasty comment about acting like a man. Instead he heard another male voice saying something far different.

"You are and it's all good. It's all good. Your father's not here, hedgehog." Adam patted Kris on the back and smiled down at him. Seeing the discombobulation in his eyes and feeling the tightness in the way Kris was holding himself, Adam gave Kris a hug and then turned to smile at Mrs. Allen. Keeping his left hand on Kris' back, he extended his right to Mrs. Allen to shake. "Speaking of good, it's good to have you here. More than good, wonderful. Kris has spoken of you so often. I hope this is the first of many visits."

Kris nodded, grateful that Adam had stepped in when he had been stricken with the tense fear of his father's negative attitude. Wow, his father wasn't even here and still... still he was waiting for the hammer. Instead all he felt was Adam's hand on his back, rubbing up and down. He sighed and leaned back into the soothing touch and smiled at his mother. "Mebbe I am just like you. That's a good thing." 

Kim bit her lip as she considered the moment she had just witnessed. Kris had gotten upset -- as he always had -- at showing emotion outside of anger or excitement at a sports game. And then Adam had stepped forward and in a few quick strokes had pointed out the problem, calmed Kris down in a way she'd never been able to _and_ greeted her. Oh! Greeted her! She'd think about how Adam had pinpointed Neal Allen as the problem later. Later. Now... She had to thank her son's...boyfriend. Boyfriend. That was the word. An okay word, a fine word. And my, the man was tall. And... great eyes. "Thanks so much for having me. I'm so glad to be here and..." She reached out and flung her arms around her son again. "So glad to be with my baby again."

"Moooommmmm!" Kris complained, although he did not move out of her embrace. "I'm not a baby."

"You'll always be my baby. I'm so sorry, so sorry I forgot that and..." Kim started to cry again.

"'Sokay, Mama...." Kris rubbed his mother's back. God, he'd do anything to make sure she didn't cry. "Let me show you to your room." 

"That would be good. I need to repair my make up, I bet." Kim sniffled and smiled apologetically at Leila. "I'm sure I'm a mess."

"You're amongst family, so please don't worry about it," Leila offered with a smile. "But I'm sure you'd like to freshen up. So go on up and take as long as you need," she urged.

"Yeah, we'll wait." Adam smiled and touched Kris' shoulder, then bent down and whispered, "If you want to just get that discussion over with now, my mom and I can leave?"

"No. I don't want to. No." Kris shook his head. Now that she was here, he didn't want to fight. He just wanted to... let it be. Ignore it. They could just move on.

"Okay. Just..." Adam shook his head and smiled ruefully. He was between a rock and a hard place. If he pushed, Kris would get angry. If he didn't push, Kris would avoid dealing with the problems and go all hedgehog on him later for something else. "I'll mind my own business."

"Let's go, Mom. The apocalypse is upon us. Adam just said he'd mind his own business. Let's get on higher ground." He grinned, picked up the suitcase and led the way to the stairs. 

 

 

"He's going to avoid having a discussion with her," Adam announced abruptly as he and his mother walked into the kitchen.

"He's..." Leila stopped and stared in the direction of the stairs. "Do you think so?"

"I'd bet the profit from my next single on it." Adam urged his mother to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of wine out of the wine refrigerator. "Kris excels at avoidance sometimes. And he's so happy to see his mother, he's not going to want to have a discussion that could lead to a fight - he'll see that as spoiling their time together." 

"Adam." Leila began. She knew her son. 

"Mom, he's going to just sweep it all under the rug. And that can't be healthy." Adam shoved the corkscrew into the cork and pushed down hard. "You repress something and it pops up later, nasty and twisted." 

"Adam." 

"I think it's a mistake." Twisting the corkscrew, Adam then pushed down the levers, grunting as the recalcitrant cork finally yielded.

"Adam."

"A big one." Adam glared at the cork, then tossed it toward the sink. He'd deal with it later. "It could be avoided if he just bit the bullet and got it over with."

"Adam."

"Like a Band-Aid. I'm always one for ripping it off, just getting it over with. And he's the one who has to pick pick pick at it -- and then I end up ripping it off because it's driving me nuts!" The wine glasses Adam plunked down on the kitchen island gave a sharp _ping!_ as the glass hit the granite. 

"Adam! You cannot rip this Band-Aid off. You cannot!"

"Mom." Adam shook his head as he poured the wine, then looked up with a mischievous grin. "I know that. Sheesh."

"You..." Leila picked up a spoon and swatted her son on the shoulder. "You had me going."

"I know. It's the only fun I'm likely to get for the next few days since Kris says we can't have sex while his mom is in our house."

"Well, thanks ever so much for that newsflash." Leila rolled her eyes. "Would you like to hear about my sex life, since we're apparently exchanging intimate details?"

"Ummm...no?" Adam asked with a sheepish grin. His mother always won these little exchanges. "So you're going to stay over too? Right? Please?"

"You want me as a buffer."

"I want you to keep me from opening my big mouth."

Leila laughed. "Like anyone can keep you from opening your big mouth."

"Well, Kris could, but since he's not giving me sex..." 

Leila took a long sip of wine, then noted, "I really should have washed your mouth out with soap when you were a kid."

 

"Here's the bathroom..." Kris pointed to it, then gestured at the stack of towels and small basket of toiletries. Dani had enjoyed making up the room for his mom, anticipating that she would become a grandmother to the baby. Some day. Adam had been adamant that Kris not tell his mother about the baby until they were sure she was going to be a permanent fixture in their lives. He could see the point -- it would be horrible for a child to have their grandmother withdraw from their lives. How ugly that would be. 

"It's very pretty," Kim noted with a smile. Nicely decorated. 

"Adam's best friend Danielle made up the little basket of stuff for you. Well, she made up the whole room. She's good with that kind of thing. Adam and I aren't."

"Adam isn't? I thought all gay guys were into interior decoration and whatnot."

Sucking back a shocked breath, Kris choked, then coughed. He held back a sharp retort with great effort, then took another breath before answering. "Adam has strong opinions about art, but bathroom toiletries? No." He shook his head. "And why just Adam?"

"Did I... Did I say something wrong?" Kim asked carefully. She felt like she was walking around the edges of a frozen pond, unsure how far to step.

"Mom. You know... We're not all Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, Mom."

"I always liked that Carson guy." Kim smiled, hoping to avoid a fight about what she didn't even know, but she could tell by the tight smile and even tighter set to Kris' jaw that she had stepped wrong. 

"I know." Kris nodded. His mother was going to avoid any real discussion. Well, fine with him. 

"I never let your father know I watched that show." Kim pressed her lips together as she hung her clothes up in the large closet Kris had shown her. 

"I know that too," Kris admitted softly. That was one of the katrillion ways he'd known that Neal and Kim Allen would never be able to accept a gay son. Then again, that was the past. His mother was here now. Can't change the past, so focus on the present, right? "I thought of you when I met him once at a party. He's pretty funny."

"Oooh, will we run into him?"

"LA isn't Conway. We're not gonna run into him at the diner on Sunday morning after church." 

"Speaking of which..." Kim halted in her unpacking. "Do you go to church?"

"I... No." Kris shook his head. 

"It's important to foster a personal relationship with your savior."

"I don't need to go to church to do that." Kris took his mother's suitcase and stowed it in the bottom of the closet. "No offense, but what I remember from church was a lot of gossip and politics." He paused, deciding not to add that a third aspect of church he remembered was condemnation of people like him. "I feel like I can get closer to God when I'm not dealing with crap like that -- just gets in the way."

Kim froze, wondering if Kris also remembered all the sermons about how homosexuals were going straight to hell. She wasn't going to think about that because she'd come to the conclusion that such a thing couldn't be true. Her sweet boy was a good boy and wasn't going to hell. That was ridiculous. And even if it were true, he could always repent. But if Kris wasn't going to bring it up, neither was she. After all, did any of that matter now? "I'm so glad to be here with you, son."

"Me too." Kris smiled and then asked, "So I went grocery shopping according to that list you gave me -- are you gonna cook dinner with me the way you promised?"

"Of course! Fried chicken, right?"

"And dump cake!"

Kim laughed and threaded her arm through Kris to head downstairs. "You and your dump cake! You'll never change."

 

Everything was changed, Kim thought as she rolled her napkin into a crumpled mess on her lap, then smoothed it out. In the past, she and Kris would've cooked dinner and laughed over whatever stupid story of some stupid stunt someone they knew had pulled that day. Dinner would have been an easy exchange of local gossip about people they'd known forever, with talk about church and work and maybe Neal ranting on about some local politics along with Daniel. She and Kris would talk about music off to the side. It had all been...comfortable or at least familiar. 

But now? Kim had realized only after several false starts that she couldn't really talk about all those people from back home given that most of them viewed Kris as a sinner bound for hell and Kris knew it. What would be the point of talking about them? Thank god for Adam and Leila, both of whom were chatterboxes. And who kept talking about the people she was realizing really were Kris' family these days. 

Kris nodded and smiled as Adam told of a funny experience when everyone on the last tour had gone geocaching with them. Thank god Adam could tell endless stories because he was floundering trying to talk to his mother. In the past, he'd had to carefully censor himself, but he'd always managed to have conversations about others without saying much about himself other than music. He'd hoped that now... he couldn't quite believe it, but here he was the boyfriend of one of the most prominent gay men in the country and he still felt like he had to censor himself. He didn't want to fight or have to argue with his mother and he didn't want to have to tell her...stuff. She still had hang-ups about him being gay or ideas about gay people -- like that whole bit about thinking they were all interior designers or... he rubbed his hair, hair dressers! He didn't know how much to reveal and how much to hide. 

When Kim had finished laughing at the story, Leila urged Kris, "Why don't you tell your mother how you and Adam met? That's a good story too." And a good way to ease Kim into a real understanding of Kris' life since leaving Conway.

Nodding, eager to show that she was as they said, "cool" with it, Kim agreed, "Oh yes, tell me. I...uh... read some accounts of it online..."

"Were you checking up on me, Mom?" Kris asked in surprise.

Kim flushed, then tapped her son's hand, before squeezing it. "I love stories about how couples meet. Like in _When Harry Met Sally._ So tell me, please." She needed to understand how her son and Adam had met, what they had seen in each other, what two... gay men looked for. Was it any different than what a man and a woman looked for? 

Shifting uncomfortably, Kris demurred, "Oh, Adam tells it better..."

"I've spoken enough tonight. I'm fairly sure _your_ mother wants to hear _your_ take on it." Adam raised an eyebrow and poured himself another glass of wine. No way was he making it that easy for Kris. Nope, notgonnadoit. 

Tilting the bottle of beer up to his lips, Kris pondered how to tell the story. Even now, his choices meant he had to censor himself. Damn it. He hurried to speak. "Okay. So... I was in Starbucks and couldn't find my money and the barista was gettin' darn impatient. Next thing I know someone reaches around and pays for my coffee. I turn around and..." 

Forgetting about his mother for the moment, Kris paused to smile slowly up at Adam and reached across the table to take his hand. "I looked up...way up..." He laughed. "And saw that the guy being a good Samaritan was the most gorgeous guy I'd ever seen. Those eyes... They were warm and sweet and amused. And that was it for me. I knew..." He raised his hand to Adam's face and gently brushed his fingertips along Adam's cheekbone. 

"You knew what?" Kim prompted when Kris seemed lost in smiling up at Adam. She had never seen two men look at each other like that and didn't know if she should look away or not. But she could see what Kris said about Adam's eyes -- they were special. Wait. So did Kris see guys the same way a woman would? 

Seeing the confused look on his mother's face, Kris dropped his hand and spoke quickly. "And I knew. Sitting there over coffee and a muffin, I knew that before we parted ways, I was gonna ask him out. I had to. And I did."

Adam smiled. "And I said yes. The best yes I ever said."

"There's a lyric in that," Kris said quickly, standing up. There was a lyric in that, but there was also no mother in the kitchen. "Wait, let me write it down on the lyric pad on the refrigerator!" 

"You asked him out?" Kim asked, turning around to watch her son walk into the kitchen. She was shocked. Her son had been the aggressive one? She didn't get it. She thought Kris was the... She wasn't going to think about that. "More dump cake, anyone?" 

 

"That was possibly the most awkward dinner I've ever attended," Leila observed as she and Adam loaded up the dishwasher while the Allens prepared for Kris to take his mother out for a drive to see the lights of LA from the Hills. "The starts and stops and staring... awkward and tense." 

"And _why_ would that be, Mom?"

Sighing loudly, Leila elbowed her son. "That elephant in the room kept swinging its trunk over the table, making it somewhat hard to pay attention to the conversation."

"That elephant labeled, 'Mrs. Allen threw her son out and didn't speak with him for four years'?"

"Yes, that elephant." Leila leaned against the counter. "How long do you think the two of them can ignore it?"

"Four years?" Adam shrugged. 

"I think you're right. I also think that I know where Kris gets his tendency to avoid conflict from." 

"Nature or nurture, do you think?"

"Hmm. Both? I think Kris is by nature an easy-going guy and you combine that with a father who seems, by Kris' accounts, to be hyper-aggressive and allowed to win all the time.."

"The way bullies win," Adam observed.

"Absolutely. It may have been easier to roll with the punches than stand up to him. It may have been easier to pretend that the problems from yesterday didn't exist because otherwise you'd have to confront the reality that love is conditional and that the person who's supposed to love you spends more time bullying you." 

"Which is why I'm working really hard not to be bossy."

"There are substantive differences between being bossy and being a bully," Leila said quickly. "You would never denigrate Kris or get him to try and do something wrong for him."

"No. But I don't want to confuse the issue either. Thing is... it's hard, you know? When you can see someone you love is making the wrong choice..." Adam shook his head. "I know I need to let him be, but... Mom. What should I do? Is it right to just let it go for now? We have big changes coming up in our lives and in a few months it's going to come out that we're parents and she's going to want to be a grandmother, but if she's not in a good place, a real place, an honest place..."

"I see your point," Leila agreed quickly. "The problem is that normally I'd advise you to let Kris work this out in his own time. But you don't have the luxury of time." Maybe... she should have a word with Kim, mother to mother. 

"No. We're going to be parents in a matter of months," Adam repeated to himself. He was going to be a father. He had to get it right. "We need to work this out. It's not that I see Kris turning into his father, but avoidance is one of those bad habits..."

"You mean like your perfectionism?" Leila said quickly, hearing Kim coming down the stairs. 

"What? You mean my perfectionism makes me imperfect?!" Adam teased back, turning to smile as Kim was joined by Kris in the doorway. 

 

 

"So..." Adam began as he locked the bedroom door behind him. "So how did that drive with your mother go?"

"I know what you're gonna say." Kris rubbed his eyes as he slid between the sheets of their bed. God, he was exhausted. "If you decide it's important enough to lose points by being bossy."

"I'm not going to tell you what to do." Adam nodded. He had come up with a plan while sitting at home fretting while his mother listened. "I'm just going to ask questions."

"Well, that's a new strategy." Kris smirked. "Go ahead." He stared intently as Adam began pulling off his shirt en route to the closet. Oh yeah, go ahead, take it all off. He wasn't going to buy, but he could window shop.

Tossing his shirt into the hamper, Adam finished getting undressed while he contemplated what, if anything, he should say. Oh hell, there was no way he wasn't going to say nothing... Which was probably way too many negatives in one thought. Positive, Adam. He nodded at himself in the mirror, before stepping back into the bedroom. "Oh, I'm full of new strategies."

"Now, I'm worried." Kris licked his lips as a naked Adam walked back over to the bed. Naked Adam was... Why had he thought not having sex was a good idea, anyway?

"As you should be given that you're not a strategic player." Adam grinned when Kris' eyes stayed glue to his cock and he apparently forgot they were talking. "Kris. Not a strategic player, are you?"

"Are you talking about the last time we played Risk?" Kris asked suspiciously, forcing his gaze upward. He gasped as Adam pulled back the sheet and climbed over him to get to his side of the bed. He could've walked around, but no. Of course not. Adam had to climb over and rub himself all over Kris. Which would normally be damn fine, but right now? What game was Adam playing? "I totally admit I sucked..." Sucking would be good. 

"The last time we played Risk?" Adam paused to remember, then smirked himself as Kris' hands clung to him as he slid down, kissing his way from Kris' neck down over his chest. "Oh, you mean how you bet me you'd win and forfeit a blowjob for a day for each country you lost?" 

"Talk about losing..." Kris mumbled, biting back a groan as Adam's tongue slowly licked his nipple, then sucked it hard. A groan? Oh god, if his mother heard! "Stop it!" Kris hissed, shoving himself up the bed to sit against the headboard and glare at Adam, who was now straddling his legs. Grinning at him. "You little shithead." He shoved Adam's shoulders and then remembered, "And you -- you kept kissing and licking me all the way down and then suddenly remember the bet!"

"And you fell for it every time. The look of shock on your face was never not funny." Adam laughed. He ran his fingertips along Kris' shoulder. "But maybe you learned the lesson too well."

"What lesson? Not to play Risk with you?" Kris rolled his eyes and put his hands on Adam's hips, urging him closer. When Adam's cock brushed against his stomach, Kris licked his lips. "Big deal. Or...wait. I get it. Not to bet what I don't want to lose?"

"That's it. Is that why you're not talking to your mother about the problem? Because you're afraid of losing what you have now -- your mother back?"

"Whoa!" Kris jumped. "Slam and dunk!" 

Sitting there quietly while Kris wiggled around and avoided his eyes, Adam waited, then waited some more. Finally cupping Kris' chin, he gently urged him to look up. "Listen, Mr. Avoidance, what did we decide?"

"You can't fuck it out of me!" Kris squeaked. "My mother's down the hall!"

"I know. More's the pity about that. But if I can't fuck it out of you, then I can ask you questions and you're going to answer. Do you _honestly_ think that ignoring the past is going to work well?"

"You sound like your dad," Kris said abruptly. He lowered his voice, "Do you think that's your best possible option, Ad?"

Adam froze, then laughed. "Guess I do sound like him." He sobered quickly. "But do you think ignoring the rather significant issue with your mom is your best possible option?"

"Yup. Because then we won't fight. No tears. Sounds good to me." Kris nodded stubbornly.

"So you don't think that when we repress stuff it comes back up? Like how Geoffrey talks about his mole problem -- how he thought he'd covered all the holes, but they just kept popping back up?"

"I don't want to talk about it." Kris made the motion of locking his lips and throwing away the key.

"Okay. So you won't talk about what even my mother called the elephant in the room? And we can't have sex?"

Kris nodded. He wasn't going to talk, he wasn't. Because if he started talking, then Adam would talk and Adam would convince him -- or try to -- to have that discussion with his mom that he'd really rather avoid. 

"So we really can't have sex?" Adam confirmed.

Kris rolled his eyes, then shook his head. What was Adam up to? 

"So you think you can make all the rules and I just have to abide by them?"

"Uh-oh..." Kris muttered inaudibly. "You know, Adam, I'm really stressed out--"

"Which is why sex would be a great idea. Stress relief. I"m telling you. Stress relief."

"You're unbelievable."

"I'm unbelievably horny."

Kris bit back a giggle at Adam's persistence. "Too bad. For once I'm making the rules. We're not having sex."

"Oh, I'd never break your rules when you're so stressed."

"Yeah, right." 

"I wouldn't. So _we_ can't have sex. But I can."

"Huh--wha..." Kris began, then froze when Adam licked his own palm and began pumping his cock. While sitting over him. With his balls brushing against Kris' own cock. "You're not going to whack yourself off!"

"Sure, I am. You didn't make any rule about that and I'm horny." Adam grinned as Kris stared at him in shock, open-mouthed. "Oooh, an open mouth. I like your open mouth. Especially when your lips are wet and red and puffy. Do you remember that time we were alone on the tour bus one morning and you laid on your stomach with your head over the edge and licked and sucked on just the head of my cock until I came?"

Wetting his bottom lip with his tongue, Kris nodded. "Toronto. Everyone was dying to go to Tim Horton's and we stayed behind because I was way more interested in sucking the cream out of your cock than some stupid donut."

"Mmm. That's right." Adam groaned as they stared at each other and remembered the sight of Adam's cock disappearing into Kris' mouth, the sight of Kris' tongue licking and licking and licking, his lips opening and closing over the head of Adam's cock while they reddened and slowly swelled along with the heat and size of Adam's flesh. "So good..." Adam panted as he pumped his cock harder, then faster as he felt Kris' unconscious little wiggles and thrusts of his own cock against Adam's thigh. 

Curling his fingers into the sheets, Kris held his breath, watching, disbelieving that Adam was really going to whack himself off like this. Well, he could do it too. He could. Lord knows his cock was hard enough, just from watching Adam and the occasional teasing brushes against Adam's thigh as Adam thrust into his own hand. He could do himself at the same time. They'd done it before, after all. But no, he'd made that rule and it was a good rule. Although... Damn, that was hot, the way Adam was cupping and stroking his balls with one hand while pumping his cock with the other, faster and faster, the pre-cum leaking out onto Kris' stomach. Oh hell. He could just...

Biting his lip to hold back a moan as Kris tentatively dipped his fingers into the wetness on his own stomach, then lifted his hand to his mouth and sucked his fingers clean, Adam gave in, pulled back and with a muffled groan and one last thrust came on Kris' body, cum all over his balls, cock and stomach. 

Gape-mouthed in shock, Kris stared as Adam sighed, lifted his own hand to his mouth and licked it clean, which was way hot and then and then and then rolled off Kris to lie down on his side of the bed. "Wha...." What about me? Kris wanted to scream. 

"Well. I was right. Of course. That was indeed a great stress reliever." Adam raised his hands over his head and stretched. "Oooh, now I'm so tired and ready to go to sleep. G'night, hedgehog." 

"You cannot fucking be serious!" Kris squeaked, staring at Adam who did look like he was going to fall asleep, damn that little shit, then at himself. He was hot and bothered and covered in come, which would normally be so damn sexy and Adam would've been all over him and so Adam could not be serious--

"Just playing by your rules." Adam shrugged and blinked innocently up at Kris. "You said we can't have sex. Your rules. And you wouldn't answer my questions. So what was left for me to do but have sex by myself?" 

"You..." Kris glared, trying to focus on the conversation when his cock was throbbing for release. Really, Adam had to know he wasn't really thinking clearly... Oh hell. Adam did know. 

"You might want to go clean yourself up," Adam suggested in his blandest voice and rolled over. 

_Thwack_

Kris smacked Adam's ass. "You cannot--"

"Or if you don't want to have sex, you could answer my question." Adam grinned as Kris fondled his ass. 

"Huh?" Kris squeezed Adam's ass. 

"My question." Looking over his shoulder, Adam asked, "Are you sure you don't want to have sex?"

"No! I mean, yes! I mean..." Kris moaned.

"Well, wake me up when you decide." Adam yawned elaborately, then tilted his head back and pretended to snore.

"You little shit!" Kris shrieked, laughing as he reached for Adam.

"No! Yuck! You're all cummy!" Adam jumped out of bed and raced towards the bathroom.

"I'm gonna get you!" Kris yelled, still laughing as he chased Adam into the shower. 

 

"What....?" Kim blinked as she looked up towards the ceiling as the sound of... laughing and running around and well, it sounded like two boys horsing around. "Are they playing around?"

Leila looked down into her cup of coffee and smiled. "I'd say, yes, they are playing. Sounds like Adam got Kris going. It happens frequently."

"Kris is still laughing." Kim smiled herself as she sat down opposite Leila at the kitchen table. 

"Kris laughs all the time. You didn't see much of it tonight, but Adam and Kris have spent many hours of their relationship teasing each other."

"No. I didn't see much of that tonight..." Kim paused as she heard what sounded like Kris giggling. Then laughing uproariously. She... hadn't heard much of that for years, for a long time even before Kris had left. He'd... hidden, she realized. "What else haven't I seen?"

 

"Did I tell you tonight how much I love you?" Kris whispered as he snuggled into Adam's arms sleepily. "And don't say you love me more."

"Love you more."


	45. The sweetest chance is... The second chance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 45: The sweetest chance is...**

"If you could go back in time, what would you do differently? As a mother?" Kim asked. As Leila poured her a cup of coffee, Kim looked out the patio door into the darkness and then flushed. "I'm sorry. That's a real personal question. None of my business."

Handing Kim the cup and gently sliding the sugar and creamer toward her, Leila shook her head as she sat back down again. "If I don't want to answer, I won't. So don't worry about asking."

"You're very...forthright," Kim observed as she dumped three teaspoons of sugar into her coffee and stirred.

"I'm from New Jersey originally. Subtlety is not my strong suit." Leila grinned. "Now as for your question -- I assume you're asking because of the rift between you and Kris?" When Kim nodded hesitantly, Leila nodded. "Okay. Can I give you some advice? You can take it or leave it, but let me know if you want to hear it."

"Go ahead," Kim urged, still stirring. "I feel like I failed as a mother before and I'm still failing. Everything is so awkward between Kris and me. It wasn't before...although now I'm wondering if it was for him -- if he spent a lot of energy hiding himself. And I feel like he's still hiding. Maybe so am I, because we're both afraid of having a fight. But hearing him laugh up there..." Kim pointed towards the ceiling. "He sounds free. He sounded all pinched and careful with me. Even more so than, well, I guess he was when he was living with us. It's almost worse?"

Leila looked carefully into Kim's worried eyes. At least Kim realized that something was wrong and was willing to start asking questions. A very good sign. What to say? She didn't want to anger the woman, but she also didn't think sugarcoating it was an effective strategy. "I know how much Kris has missed you. It's been a deep pain for him. Maybe he's being so cautious because he knows what can happen if he steps out of line."

"Wow, whoa." Kim gripped her cup with tight fingers. "Truth, there." She froze when she heard another burst of laughter. "And I didn't even get to see him laughing with Adam like that. Just eavesdrop on it. I don't want to just eavesdrop on his happiness. I realize he's happy with Adam and... I'd like to see that. I just don't know how to..."

"Get him to trust you again?"

"Is that... It is. Aaack! I'm not sure what to do, in fact I've got nothing! So believe me, if you've got an idea, I'd be happy to hear it. Or how you handled mistakes you've made. I'm not too proud to admit I'm floundering here." 

Leila nodded. Mama talk would also be a good way for them to forge a relationship. "I'm not too proud to admit that I have regrets as a parent to Adam. And they all seem to involve communication or the lack thereof."

Kim nodded, then asked, "Can you give me a story or an example? To make it concrete." She had grown up learning how from Bible stories, so it was familiar.

"Sure." Leila laughed. "God knows I've replayed my mistakes in my head in the middle of the night like a horror movie, so it's no problem. For example, I regret not telling Adam about the problems my husband and I were having - because it made our break-up come from nowhere. I think it undercut his sense of security in relationships. So I've made it a policy that when there is a problem in a relationship or in my life that might affect Adam, I let him know. Not the gory details, but enough to keep him on top of the situation, so he knows where I stand or so he doesn't feel blindsided."

"Sure. Like I let Kris know that I wasn't agreeing with his father any more about the gay stuff?"

"Yes, that." Leila smiled. "Another example, maybe a more pertinent one is that I also regret taking someone else's advice about waiting for Adam to tell me about his sexual orientation. It went against my gut, but I thought the guy who told me to wait for him to bring it up in his own time knew best because he was gay. But it was a mistake. He was gay, but he wasn't Adam. The longer I didn't say anything, the more anxious it made Adam. It was such a tremendous relief for him when I finally did bring it up. I only wished I had done it sooner."

When Leila paused, Kim looked into her coffee cup, watching the ripples from the spoon gently crashing against the ceramic. "So, you're saying it's all about honesty. You're right. Trust is based upon honesty. But you know what?" She pulled her spoon out and pointed it at Leila. "That's not all there is to it. I have this friend whose husband cheats on her and he thinks he should be trusted because he tells her he's done it."

"Are you serious? Does she buy that crap? It's one thing to give a second chance, but beyond that?"

Kim laughed and held up her hand. "I totally agree. I think she should kick his ass from Conway to New Orleans, but not back again. She won't. It's so frustrating to watch someone you love make bad choices. But anyway, I also think that in order to trust someone they have to be dependable, dependably good in how they _treat_ you. " 

"I agree. Which is why I'm going to ask you something." Leila took a breath and straightened her posture.

Kim stared. She recognized a woman putting on her queen of the family crown when she saw one. She also supposed she had no chance of even sharing that crown until she proved she was -- and this hurt to even admit -- a member of this extended family. "Shoot."

"I'm asking this not so much because I'm Adam's mother, although anything that affects his happiness is my concern, but because I've grown to love _Kris_ too. So his happiness is my concern as well. Are you going to make good on your second chance? Are you able to commit to being Kris' mother again? And not reject him _again_ later because that's what your husband or your best friend or your pastor tells you to do?"

"Whoa. Again." Kim pushed back in her seat. 

 

 

"Don't..." Kris hissed, sliding out from under Adam's arm as they walked into the kitchen late the next morning and saw their mothers standing there, both of them yawning. He'd been yawning himself since Adam had kept him up, tiring him out. He flushed seeing his mother glance their way. 

"Why not?" Adam hissed back, curling his hand around Kris' wrist and holding tight. He'd deliberately sucked and fucked Kris until he fell into a deep sleep and then woken up, equally relaxed and now he was all tense again? 

"My mother.... She's right there!"

"You're not serious." Adam stared at Kris incredulously. "It's our own home! And it was just an arm on your shoulder, nothing ohmigod _homosex_ ual." 

"Still--" Kris complained. He poked Adam in the shoulder.

Grasping Kris by the waist, Adam teased, "I'm going to throw you in the pool!"

"Ha! I'd like to see you try."

"Boys!" Leila took a long drink of her coffee. "It's too early."

Kim took a breath and announced, "And Kris -- It's okay if your boyfriend has his arm around you. Really. I'm a big girl, I can handle it." Kim nodded. Yup, she was going to handle it. She had stayed up most of the night, first talking with Leila, then thinking and praying. She had sat in the kitchen looking out into the darkened yard, illumined only by the watery blue glow of the pool lights and prayed and listened for a response. Jesus had answered and told her to follow her heart, her mother's heart, that the answer as always would be found in love. "I...realize I have a long way to go, but God will give me the strength I need. I have faith of that!" 

"Ooookay..." Kris said slowly and cautiously. His mother looked determined, but... He turned toward the refrigerator. "I'll make breakfast."

"Sit down and talk to your mother. I can do it," Adam offered, pushing Kris towards the table.

"You can?" Kris and Leila retorted in unison.

"Humph." Adam sniffed. "Once again, Kris, ye of little faith."

"Yeah, but it's... cooking!" Kris protested. 

"Even I can make an omelette."

Kris laughed. "You can?"

"Since when?" Leila asked. 

"Adam doesn't cook?" Kim asked, looking from Kris to Leila to Adam.

"No!" Leila and Kris said, once again in unison. 

"I bet he can if he wants to," Kim said firmly.

"I like _you_!" Adam grinned in Kim's direction.

Kim blinked. Wow, what a smile. No wonder Kris had fallen for him.

Watching his mother carefully, Kris hid his smile behind his hand. His mom was falling victim to Adam's charm. He probably should've just had Adam visit Conway and his mother would've fallen all of herself damn quick to get out here and reconnect. 

Adam glared at Kris and his mother. "Are you two trying to put me in a box?"

"Never." Leila shook her head emphatically. Trying to make Adam conform to your notions of what he should or could do was a bad idea.

Kris grinned. "Only if I could make you small enough to fit in a teeny tiny box I could take with me wherever I go." He stopped when Adam smiled at him like he'd just given him a special gift and paused to enjoy the moment. "You know. Like the Fisher Price Little People." 

Kim laughed. "You used to do that. Put the Little People in your pocket and carry them around with you. Wait. Just the boy Little People." She froze, then slowly smiled and decided to try a joke on for size. "Just the boys. Shoulda known."

Adam and Leila laughed. Kris looked startled, then when he saw the hopeful look on his mother's face, smiled at her. He tentatively reached out a hand, then let out a breath when his mother took it. All of a sudden, she was trying hard. Well, if that's how she wanted to play it, he could take the cue and hope the show would go well. "Shoulda known, right? And Adam -- don't you dare say that was adorable."

"I'd hate to be repetitive." Adam smiled, feeling the tightness in his shoulders loosen with that exchange between Kris and his mom. She was trying. His mom had texted him that she'd spent a long time talking with Kim last night and it looked like the talk had borne fruit. "Kids like stuff smaller than them. Remember those books you read to Neil and me when we were young? What was the name of them?"

" _The Littles_ books," Leila reminisced.

"Oh, I liked those books when I was a girl," Kim added, keeping a hopeful eye on Kris. He looked more relaxed now. Good. She'd needed to make an effort and it had paid off.

Leila looked at Adam and they both smiled, before she added, "Or was it _The Borrowers_?" 

Adam shrugged. "I don't need to read the books any more. After all, I _live_ with one of The Littles, so--"

"I. Am. Not. Little! Where's that spoon of yours, Leila?" Kris asked. 

"You mean a teaspoon to go with your size? Or would the teeny tiny demitasse spoon be more appropriate?" Adam teased, then backed up when Kris advanced on him, laughing."Seriously, go sit down. I am going to make an omelette!"

"Seriously?" Kris asked.

"If you must know, I asked Scarlett to teach me. And I excelled at it!" Adam smiled smugly, then laughed as he confessed, "Truthfully,I made a lot of really bad eggs -- even their dog turned his nose up at them. But eventually I got it right." 

Kris shook his head as he poured coffee and handed one cup to Adam and took a cup for himself. "Why? That's what I don't get. You've never shown any interest before."

Adam bent his head and whispered, "Maybe I'm trying to impress your mother. Prove I have some useful skills--"

"You're Adam Fucking Lambert!" Kris gaped up at his boyfriend. "You're..."

"Just a boy in love with another boy trying to impress his potential mother-in-law."

Kris smiled and leaned against Adam's side, then immediately glanced toward his mother. She was looking startled, then obviously took a deep breath and stared. Seeming to come to some decision, she smiled.

There, that was... nothing, Kim decided. Kris was leaning against his boyfriend. They looked happy and like they meshed together as a couple, standing there in the kitchen, like any other couple. That's... all. Just like any other couple. Except, maybe that the hand Adam had put on Kris' shoulder, rubbing the plaid shirt with his thumb, was more supportive than any other potential son-in-law might have been giving in such a situation. Because-- oh! Kim smiled. "Adam, I like cheese omelettes, if you don't mind."

"That I can do!" Adam nodded and gave Kris a push toward the table. "Go sit down with the ladies, while I perform culinary magic."

"Sure. That I gotta see." Kris started to move, then took a sharp turn, pulling open a drawer. "Just in case, I'll get out the take-out menus..."

"You're going to eat your words, little man."

"I'd settle for eating an egg. You can _boil_ an egg, can't you?"

"Listen, Humpty Dumpty, you're about to fall into a million pieces..." Adam paused. "Wait. There's an idea for Halloween this year!"

"I am not going as an egg!" Kris protested. "How would I sit down?"

"Maybe we can rig it up so that when you sit down, you crack--" Adam began.

"Oh, that'd be kinda cool..." Kris nodded. 

"Or if we're going to go with old nursery rhymes, you could be...." Adam paused and winked. " _Little_ Boy Blue..."

"Are you cooking or not?" Leila prompted. When Adam stuck out his tongue, she swatted him with the spoon.

"Ow!" Adam rubbed his arm.

"Where do you hide that spoon?" Kris complained."I wanted it."

"Mothers have our ways." Leila winked at Kim, then explained, "If Adam gets distracted by an opportunity to play dress up, we'll be eating take out for the next week. Adsm's enthusiasm will consume us all."

"It's his favorite holiday. It's a really big deal. Maybe..." Kris began, his tone hopeful. "You can come out for Halloween some year. Adam always throws a big party."

" _We_ throw a big party," Adam corrected automatically as he pulled every pan out of the cabinet. "Kris likes Halloween almost as much as I do."

"Kris always did like Halloween. I have tons of pictures of him in various superhero costumes. Do you have any pictures of Kris in costumes?" Kim asked, holding her hands together under the table. 

Kris rolled his eyes. "There are more pictures of me in the last two years than in the rest of my life before meeting Adam."

"Here." Adam handed Kim the frame that was on the kitchen counter, then walked back to the refrigerator. Honestly, sometimes all the planets aligned to do what was necessary. 

"A digital photo frame?" Kim asked.

"Yes, our friend Danielle gave it to us for our anniversary," Adam explained, opening the refrigerator. The door was useful for hiding one's dick or one's face. "They're all photos of Kris and I over the years. I bet you'd enjoy seeing him." 

"I bet I would!" Kim agreed with a smile as she picked up the frame and watched the slide show of pictures. 

"Let me reset it for you so it's in chronological order," Leila offered. 

Kim thanked Leila, then asked, "You two boys are going to give me a running commentary, right?"

"I have to cook." Adam smiled over the top of the refrigerator door. "Mom, can you help?" Leila nodded and they both walked over to the sink. 

Kris rolled his eyes. Adam wanted Kris to spend more time with his mother. Subtlety was not Adam's strong suit. He sat down next to his mother and began explaining each photo.

Kim pressed the stop button abruptly. "Sweetie, these photos of you, I guess from a while back? You're so skinny. Why weren't you eating right? Oh!" Kim gasped and put her hand over her mouth. "Did you get.... addicted to drugs when you came out here?"

"Mom..." Kris counted to ten. "First of all, crystal meth is all over Arkansas, so don't act like drugs are some big city thing. Second, I was skinny..." He stopped. This was going to be hard. "Skinny..."

"Emaciated," Adam interjected.

"Thanks so much, Human Thesaurus." Kris glared, then pressed his lips together. "Forget it, Mom. I was just skinny. No big deal." 

"You're welcome. So." Adam looked at Kim. "To continue the story, it was a big deal that Kris was skinny."

Seeing the honesty and determination in Adam's face while her own son squirmed, Kim ordered, "Tell me. " She added, "Please. If Kris won't tell me, that means it's important. So I'd like you to do it." 

"Adammmmm...." Kris warned, knowing it was futile. He could feel the train coming. His mama and Adam had made up their minds. He was a goner. 

Her hand on his jaw, Kim turned her son's face toward hers. "Last night, I was praying and then I opened my Bible. I read one passage and it reminded me of something important, why I'm pressing for your true story this morning. Can you guess which passage it was?"

"Is this Sunday school class?" Kris retorted, then flinched when his mother pinched his chin. "Okay, okay." He thought and then nodded. "Is it John 8:32. The passage about the truth setting you free?" He looked away, not wanting to think about it too hard. 

"Yes, that's it. Now, who's going to tell me the truth about why you were so skinny?"

When the silence lengthened uncomfortably, punctuated by Kris shaking his head, Adam blurted out, "He was skinny because he was hungry because he didn't have enough money to both buy food and pay for shelter." 

"You..." Kim swallowed hard and blinked as she looked at her son tearfully. 

"You...." Kris glared at Adam. "Why don't you go ahead and tell her I was homeless at one point, too!"

"Don't need to," Adam said softly. "You just did." 

"Adam!" Kris growled, then slapped his hand on the table. "Do not--"

"Is this the hedgehog mode?" Kim asked, deliberately interrupting. She put her hand on Kris' and squeezed. "I know what you're doin'. Avoiding."

"I know what _he's_ doin'." Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "Adam's real big on understanding the consequences of your actions. He's tryin' to make you understand that..." He took a deep breath and watched as Adam walked over to him, all careful, as if he might bolt. Well, he might. He just might and... Guess not. Now that Adam had put his hand on his shoulder and held him into place. 

"She needs to understand, Kris. Give her a chance to handle the truth," Adam suggested in a low tone, speaking directly into Kris' ear, brushing the edge of it with his lips, before continuing to urge him to continue. 

"I..." Kim watched her son struggle for words and also watched Adam softly whispering to him, obviously encouraging him to continue. Kris was so stubborn. "Krissy, it's not Adam's fault, not that I'd say it was fault, like something to blame. I asked about the photos and to be honest, I was determined today to talk about what happened. I think we have to."

"I don't wanna."

"Well, me neither!" Kim admitted, then squeezed his hand again. "But I've been thinking a lot. And praying. And I truly believe I need to hear to know what happened when you drove away, what's happened since then. You're... different than than the young man I knew and I want to know why. I think it's something more than just normal growing up. I think it's a reaction to everything that happened." 

Adam watched Kris carefully. He was holding his breath. For the love of... Adam slapped Kris on the back, exhaling himself when Kris took a gasping breath. "Go on, Kris."

"Okay. Mom." Kris took another deep breath and looked down at his hands. Adam had tried to get him to role play this moment and now he'd wished he hadn't dismissed the idea as California mumbo jumbo. "I don't know where to start."

"How about at the beginning," Kim suggested. "The day. That horrible, no good, terrible, awful, very bad day." 

Swallowing hard, Kris nodded. "Okay. Here goes. Here's the thing. When you and dad threw me out, that was the worst day of my life. Like it hurts to even think about it, after all this time, it still hurts so much."

"I know," Kim said softly, schooling herself to wait and stay quiet. Leila Lambert had cautioned her to listen, listen, listen. This was Kris' story. Not hers. Her son's. He had a right to tell it the way he wanted. And she didn't actually know what it felt like to have your parents toss you and your belongings out and tell you to get out. She didn't. "Or I guess I don't. Not from your point of view. That's what I need to know so we can have a real chance again. Your point of view. Your truth. Go on."

"Okay, you asked for it," Kris warned. "It was like my every nightmare come true. It was why I never told you that I was gay. I knew what would happen. I did. That was one of the first questions Adam asked me, you know? If I was shocked by your reaction or if it was like living my worst nightmare coming true. I knew my worst fears would come true. That I wasn't worthy of being your son, being in a family, worthy of... love. And then..." 

Kris bent his head and rubbed his eyes. "Okay, I'm not going to detail two years of me floundering and sinking. I'm not. Because we'd be here for days and... I'm hungry. I'm always hungry, you know. Because... Adam's right, I...I was hungry. I wasn't making enough money so I wasn't eating right, but." He looked up and out the window, avoiding everyone's eyes. "I'm wondering now if the truth is, maybe I was punishing myself too. Like Pearline with her snakes."

"Oh hell no." Kim covered her mouth. "That kind of crazy Christianity that thinks you have to suffer pain to achieve grace and redemption?"

"Maybe. I don't know. I really don't. Now? It all seems like a blur. Like a bad dream. All's I know is I wasn't myself, but I wasn't a new me, either. I just wasn't anything -- or that's what I felt."

"Did you... Pearline's snakes. Did you do things to hurt yourself? So that you'd punish yourself or like those kids who cut themselves -- in order to feel?"

"I...no. Maybe. Maybe the hunger was...Or maybe I was just really that poor. Or...I don't know. I don't know!" Kris heard the anxiety in his voice and clamped his lips shut. He forced himself to breathe slowly and eventually realized that not only was Adam touching his back, but so was Leila and his mother. He took a deep breath, hearing the tears in his throat and swallowed hard, then nodded gratefully when his mother gave him her cup of coffee. "I'm okay. I"m okay."

"We'll just be right here if you need us," Leila said softly as she and Adam backed away. 

Kris nodded and continued. "I did finally get a second job at McDonald's and that gave me discounts on food, even if it's not waffles and chicken. But that was after John and Geoffrey and..." Kris shook his head and hurried on, refusing to look at Adam who, with Leila, was pretending to prepare to cook. He stared at Adam long enough that Adam turned around.

Adam frowned and stepped forward. He didn't know the right strategy. "Should we leave? I'm sorry, I--"

"No, no. Stay," Kris urged. "I feel better, stronger if you're here with me. If I chicken out, you can call me on it. Okay?"

"Whatever you want," Adam agreed. He let out a breath and looked over at his mother, realizing she had done the same. 

Leaning close, Leila whispered, "I'm shocked at Kris just talking like this."

"I'm not, not really. Usually if you push him hard enough, it will all come spilling out. It's just getting him to that point." 

"I heard that!" Kris called out with a smile. What a relief to have someone know you that well and love you, warts and all. He didn't deserve it. "But anyway, Mom. I guess, those two years after I left home, I felt so alone... Completely alone. And like I was being punished."

"Like Job."

"Yeah, but..." Kris shook his head again. "I wasn't alone, not really, but I couldn't see it. I was blind, ya know? I couldn't see what was before me. I was so scared and let's be honest. I had a lot of self-pity. My boss at the bar -- John -- he was actually a friend. He would've helped if I'd asked and truth is, he did help even without me asking. He gave me a job, and a sandwich and a place to sleep. But I was blind and bitter..."

"You?" Kim bit her lip. She would have thought Kris did not have the capacity to be bitter. "I don't have enough ways to say I'm sorry, sweetie. I don't. I just..." She stopped and then urged, "Go on. Tell me more." 

"It was not... a good time. And then, and then..." Kris paused and through the whirling confusion in his brain, the hurt and anger of old memories combining with his fear of driving his mother away or having a horrible fight with her combined with her uncharacteristic silence... he didn't know what to say next. "Geoffrey and... I met Adam and..." He stopped, unsure of how to go on. Unsure of what to confess, how to explain the desperation and the hope, the darkness and then the light. 

When Kris stayed silent, Adam said in a deliberately bright and theatrical voice, "He met me! The deep darkness overhead parted and rays of sun peered through the clouds, while angels danced on dust motes and--"

"And the sun bounced off of glitter." Kris laughed, then laughed some more. "I'll always remember that moment."

"So will I," Adam agreed. "So will I."

The look the two men were sharing was nostalgic and... sweet, Kim decided. Humph. Neal had been wrong. It wasn't all just about sex and sin. She knew it. She knew her son. He wasn't some horrible sinner. He was just a boy -- No. A man who had found love. Surely God couldn't punish love. She sat up straight and nodded. No, God would not punish love. His Son was all about bringing God's love. She nodded again, making up her mind. "You're talking about the first time you met Adam, right?"

"Right. I knew I wanted to be with him. He was like irresistible. He invited me to sit down with him and Laney -- who scared the crap out of me."

"She still scares the crap out of me!" Adam confessed.

"Yeah, especially when she's pointing those scissors at me!" Kris laughed reminiscently and explained, "She was warning me to treat Adam right, pointing these scissors at me she was using to cut stuff out for Leila's scrapbooks--"

"Oh, do you have scrapbooks?" Kim asked in surprise. "I do too!"

Leila nodded. This conversation had been painful and was by no means the end of it all, but it was going well. Kim was a very determined mother. "Yes, I have scrapbooks of both my boys."

"My scrapbooks are way more interesting than Neil's!" Adam added with a grin.

"Sibling rivalry never ends..." Leila heaved a deep sigh. "Go on with your story, Kris."

Kris nodded. It was good that his mom realized she and Leila had typical mom things in common. "So anyway, Adam was super easy to talk to and super easy on the eyes to look at." He grinned up at Adam. "Next thing I knew I'm telling him about Little Mr. Little Rock..." He paused when his mother gave a surprised bark of laughter. 

"You never tell anyone about that!" Kim burst out, giving a closer look to Adam. He seemed like a fine young man and obviously deeply in love with her son. But for Kris to tell the Little Mr. Little Rock story to him at their first meeting, well, that was significant stuff. What was there about Adam? She had to know. "Why?" 

Looking into Adam's eyes and reading the love and encouragement there, Kris stood up. He was going to say it, what he could've just said right from the get go. Just get it out there. "There's something about Adam that just makes a person confide in him. He's the type of person you can trust. With everything. He's... safe. And that was important to me. What I needed. And yet, he's way more than that. What we have is way more than that. It's not just safety. It's the kind of love everyone should have. It's what he deserves, what I deserve, what is the ultimate gift of grace." 

"The greatest of these is love. You're right," Kim said softly. Kris had something to get out. It was still her turn to listen. 

Kris looked at his mother and watched her process his words, waited for her to nod. When she did, he continued. "You want truth? The truth is that the brand of Christianity back in our house -- that is what drove me away, made you throw out your son, made you treat your own son with hate, not love. I felt like I was worthless in your eyes and in God's eyes. And then and then... I met Adam and we fell in love and everything fell into place, like God was waiting for me to open my heart and then He'd help me find my way out into the light. So that sort of evil relationship, that sinning lifestyle? The reason I was thrown out? That's what saved me."

 

**The second chance**

 

"Where do you want to go today, Mom?" Kris asked. 

"Hollywood Boulevard? To see the stars on the Walk of Fame and the Chinese Theater? Is that okay or it is too tourist?"

Tourist stuff would be good, Kris decided. Lots to see and hear, which meant fewer awkward silences. They were doing better, communicating -- as Adam and Leila would say -- but there was still that weird tentativeness between them. He guessed it was just going to take time. And... damn it, maybe a conversation about his father. Some day. Not today though. They didn't have to get deep or exchange confidences today. Nope. Today was just about having some fun with his mama. 

Clearing his throat, Kris announced, "We'll do whatever you want. There's also a really good place to take a picture of the Hollywood sign there too. And the Kodak Theatre where they host the Oscars is there. I bet Adam knows someone who can give us a quick tour there, if you want." 

"I know Leila's busy today, but will Adam be able to go with us? I'd like to spend more time with him, get to know him better." Kim smiled. She would like to get to know Adam Lambert better. She was having a really hard time reconciling the crazy and way too sexual performer she'd seen on the YouTube with the sweet and even dorky guy she'd seen over the last week. To say nothing of some of the accusations on her favorite Christian mom's message board about how he and his kind were perverts. It just didn't make sense and given that her son was involved, she had to figure this out. Something was wrong, or rather, someone was wrong and she was going to find out who it was. 

Kris looked at his mother and forced a smile. She was still trying so hard; it would be good when the day came that they could just be natural with each other. But every time she tried to bridge the gap, he gained more confidence that someday it would be, well, not back to normal, but on to a new normal. He just wasn't quite ready yet to trust her or this new relationship. After all, they'd had a relationship for more than twenty years that she'd thrown away, so who's to say she wouldn't do it again? 

"Is something wrong? Did I say something wrong?" Kim asked as the silence lengthened.

"Uh, no. I was just spacing out." Kris shrugged. "As for Adam, he wouldn't go with us downtown. Hollywood Boulevard is full of tourists who think they're gonna come to Hollywood and see a star. So if someone like Adam shows up there... Mob scene. It can actually get kinda scary."

"How often does it happen?" 

"Not too much. Adam's really good at hiding in general. It's just situations like down there that could be a pain in the patootie." 

"Oh. Is that... how is that for you?"

Kris shrugged. "Part of the job. I don't enjoy it, but can't say I wasn't warned. Ninety-nine point nine percent of the fans are great. It's just when it becomes a mob scene that it gets a little scary." He paused and whispered, "Don't tell Adam, but it's scarier for me because I can't see over the crowd and he can. So it feels kinda claustrophobic. But I don't mind the meet and greets or when there are barriers -- heck, last year on his tour, I was his assistant setting those up. Actually, to be honest, I enjoyed meeting people like that. Or even if a couple people approach us on the street or a store. It's the mob scene that I don't like." Kris shuddered. "Adam keeps calm though. Well, as long as people aren't trying to invade our private time. Then he can have a fit."

"Is that okay? I mean..." Kim asked cautiously. Kris had always had a problem dealing with his father's anger.

"Sure." Kris shrugged, then realized what his mother was asking. "Adam... _Adam_ is just being protective. He'd never hurt anyone. He can be way too over protective, waaaaaaaaaaay. But his intentions are always good."

Kim nodded. For all his outrageousness, the boy practically screamed that he was safe as houses, as her mother would have said. "You trust him."

"With my life." Kris nodded. "He's the best. Just the best." He smiled. "Even if his first few omelettes really did suck chunks."

Kim laughed. "They did, didn't they? He was so disappointed." She kept chuckling as she remembered Adam's bewildered dismay at his culinary failures. "Adam seems so...well, normal isn't the right word. It's hard to imagine him being mobbed by people like a star." Kim laughed. 

"If you see him in concert, you'll get it more. I promise." Kris looked off at nothing, a flurry of stage images going through his mind. "He has so much charisma." 

Kim started as she made a connection. "Is that why you came home from Milwaukee yapping on about his concert years ago?"

Well, yeah and the fact that he sang Whole Lotta Love writhing around on the stairs while I almost had a spontaneous orgasm, Kris thought to himself. Hoping he wasn't blushing too obviously as he then remembered when he'd cajoled Adam into reenacting that performance for him at home and his orgasm that night had been... Kris coughed. "Best live performer I've ever seen." 

"He's a little...more than normal, isn't he? Even when he's just hanging out at home, he's not just hanging out. There's something about him..."

Kris relaxed. He had been waiting for her to say something derogatory, but in fact... "You hit the nail on the head. And I'm startin' to wonder if you're gettin' a crush on my boyfriend." 

"Don't be silly!" Kim began, then with a smile, shrugged. She wasn't sure how far or when to push her luck, but she'd only learn from trying. Besides, she missed the way she and Kris used to tease each other. "Then again... maybe. He's awfully hot, isn't he?"

"MOM! Eww!"

"Hey, I just thought of something. One advantage to having a gay son is that we can talk about hot guys together, right?"

"What? Mom, NO!"

"It just occurs to me that--" Kim grinned. Ha. She had him. 

"That's all sorts of wrong! Stop it!"

"What's he hedgehogging about?" Adam asked as he walked into the foyer with his mother, both of them carrying groceries. Both of the Allens liked to cook and they'd eaten at home more in the last week than in the last two months. He wondered though if they were cooking to avoid talking or maybe the cooking facilitated the talking and they'd be doing even less if they weren't occupying their hands and avoiding looking each other in the face. Most likely his own mother was right and he was just too freaking impatient and should let the two of them sort it out on their own. He might just die first, though, from biting his tongue. 

"Nothing, Adam, nothing." Kim smiled what she knew was a smug smile. "I was just saying--" 

"My mom thinks you're hot!" Kris exclaimed, before his mother could say something... horrible. What was she up to? Was she... teasing about being gay? He leaned against the counter and stared at her incredulously. Maybe, this was going to be okay? And if so, what should he do?

"Excuse me?" Adam laughed as he plunked bags down on the island. Kris' mom was yanking his chain. Had to be.

Kris gasped and pointed at his mother. "She's turning into a Glambert! Next she'll be talking about your glambulge!"

"WHAT?" Kim and Adam said in unison.

Kris smirked. "Ha. Got you both." 

"I think I need a drink," Adam muttered.

"So do I," Kim muttered. She searched her mind and then nodded. A good diversion was needed. "So, Adam, Kris tells me you might be able to get us into the Kodak Theatre for a tour."

"Thank you for the change of subject," Adam whispered to her. "Or I can arrange for a tour of the Pantages Theater if you want. It's an historic theater and much more interesting," he suggested. "I still know the stage manager."

Kris explained, "Adam was in Wicked at that theater."

"As an _understudy_." Adam grimaced.

Kris laughed at the look on Adam's face. "He's still bitter about that."

"No, I'm not. I've let it go."

"Surrrrre." Kris shrugged and exchanged a wink with Leila. He turned abruptly as an idea occurred. "Hey. Listen. You remember how you were talking the other day with Laney about finding a way to do a charity performance to benefit the Actors' Fund -- why don't you see if you can arrange to put on Wicked with yourself as Fiyero?"

"That's a perfect connection..." Adam said excitedly, then froze. "Wait. Isn't that a little narcissistic? Using a charity to fulfill an old hope?" 

Kim opened her mouth to say that it seemed like a win-win situation to her, then shut it as she realized Kris was carrying on, arguing with Adam in, well, an expert way. She looked over at Leila who was rolling her eyes as the boys batted the idea around. 

Leaning in, Leila whispered, "We let Kris handle it. He manages Adam better than anyone." 

Watching the two men argue -- or rather as Adam let Kris convince him to try the idea out as they put away groceries -- Kim realized for the first time that Kris might have a more quiet way about him than Adam did, but Adam listened to Kris with the same respect Kris gave his words and probably, more intensity. Then again, Adam seemed to be intense about everything which was probably why the Kris' easygoing nature suited him. A good match, Kim decided. Yes, the two men seemed to, well, fit together. She had to think about this for a second.

 

 

"Did you go back for your second fitting?" Lane looked up from her checklist to stare at Kris. Who was silent. And therefore guilty.

"Fitting, what fitting?" Kim asked when she saw the guilty look on her son's face, looking up at Lane. Lane was somewhat... intimidating.

"What fitting?" Kris repeated, opening his eyes wide. It worked for Adam and--- Uh oh. Not gonna work for him. "C'mon, Laney, it's just pants!"

Tapping her foot on the floor, Lane glared at Kris. "Do not tell me you are prevaricating about the fitting for Adam's tour? Do you want to be punished?"

Tommy smirked. "Yeah, if Adam's doing the punish---Ouch!" Tommy rubbed his arm and took his turn glaring at Kris.

"Dude, my mom is right there! She just got over me being gay, so no stupid jokes!" Kris ordered. Damn that stupid Tommy! Kris had been delaying the fitting to irritate Adam into 'forcing' him to go and then they'd have a tussle about the clothes and... he sighed...fun would have happened.

"What fitting?" Kim repeated. She was going to ignore the joke that young man with the floppy pink hair had tried to make. She knew what people said about how sick gay people were in the bedroom, but she refused to think of her precious baby like that. 

"Did you even tell your Mom that you're going on tour with Adam?" Cale asked, correctly guessing the truth from the panic on Kris' face that had replaced a weirdly goopy expression that no doubt mean Kris had been thinking about Adam. But forgetting to tell his mom about the tour? "Dude, what the hell?"

"Apparently, I must do everything!" Lane complained, slapping her papers against her legs, before shoving them into her bag. "Mrs. Allen, the missing link to your understanding is that Kris was offered and accepted the job of playing the electric bass on Adam's upcoming tour. World tour. They leave in three weeks, as it happens." 

"World tour? Are you coming anywhere near Conway?"

"Yeah, Mom, in between Hong Kong and Berlin, we'll -- Ow!" Kris winced as he rubbed the back of his arm where his mother had pinched him.

"Don't sass me, young man!" Kim crossed her arms and glared at her son until he apologized. "Okay, fine. Now tell me. The electric bass? I didn't even know you played!"

"I learned." Kris sighed. With a sidelong glance at Tommy, he added, "It's not that hard. After all, _Tommy_ plays."

"Hey!" Tommy protested with a grin. 

Kim smiled as she looked around the gathering around them as Kris and this Tommy bickered amiably. Adam was off at a photo shoot and expected home shortly, but all these people seemed to be good friensd with her son. There were two girls named Allison here, Kris' boss John and his wife and brother, a woman with the name Scarlett and her family, a bunch of dancer types and well, just a lot of interesting folk,all of whom seemed to like Kris a lot. He had acquired quite a few friends out there. After his story about being lonely and lost, it was such a relief to know he had a whole circle around him now. 

Lane interrupted Kris and Tommy's stupid argument to remind him, "Talk to your mother, Plaid Boy. Tell her about your other instruments and the school."

Kris drained his Coke, then explained, "I've also been taking more advanced piano lessons and refreshing myself on the viola."

"He's signed up to be a volunteer music teacher at needy schools!" Lane explained. "I'm so proud of him." 

"I would have been too -- if he told me! Any of it! Why didn't you tell me about the tour?" Kim asked. "I don't understand why you're not over the moon about this, bursting about it. It's a music job! Touring the world! Ohmigosh, are you going to be on Youtube too now? Leno? Ohmigosh, I can't wait to tell your, I mean, Merleeta!"

"Why? Because she said I'd never amount to anything?" Kris sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. Both he and his mom were avoiding the elephant back in Conway -- his father who had always said he wouldn't amount to anything because he didn't have enough drive. He knew what his father would say about this touring job. Knew it. He just had to work harder on not caring. His mother being here had brought back stuff he'd thought he'd gotten past. "Just be prepared for the crack about me getting the job because of who I sleep with."

"Not that again!" Lane groaned, then silenced herself when she caught the look of comprehension followed by fear on Mrs. Allen's face. Bloody hell. Apparently Kris did have reason to worry about how people -- _some_ people -- might view his touring with Adam. She'd bet her Christmas bonus that both Kim and Kris were anxious about Neal Allen. Bloody wanker that he was. 

"Seriously, dude, get over it!" Tommy urged impatiently.

"I'm with them, Kris." Cale shrugged unapologetically when Kris glared at them. "How many people get jobs because of who they know -- whether it's a friend or relative or husband or some shirt-tail relation? Who cares as long as you do a good job?"

"I don't want people to think I...." Kris paused and glanced at his mother, then firmed his chin and said, "I don't want people to think I'm sleeping my way into a job like some whore."

"So because Adam and Lane offered me your old job on tour, should I be worried that people are gonna think I'm a whore too?" Cale asked. 

"The two of you! Language!" Kim snapped, her nervous tension making her voice sharper than normal. "And more importantly, Kris? Adjust the attitude. You need an attitude adjustment. Getting a job based on who you know? Krissy, that's the way of the world. I got my last job because my cousin's husband's sister was hiring."

Cale shrugged. "I got my job in Conway because my sister is married to the guy whose father owns the franchise. When I move out here permanent, I'll be happy to accept help from anyone in finding a good job. It's just a favor we all do for each other. No biggie." Neal Allen might not view it that way, but he was an asshole.

Kim nodded. "And if I recall correctly, you got a lot of your coffee house and bar gigs because of classmates whose family or friends owned or managed the bar. It's all who you know. Everywhere. So you might have gotten a leg up on the competition for this job because you're the boss' boyfriend. Big deal. What's the difference between me and Cale getting jobs due to relationshps and you?"

"Yes, darling. What's the difference?" Lane smirked, determined not to show pity because Kris would get even more prickly.

"Thank you, Lane, for seeing the truth!" Kim glared at her son and crossed her arms over her chest. "Kris is just being stubborn."

"I am not! And heyyyyyyyyyy--" Kris trailed off as Cale grabbed his arm and pulled him aside.

Cale bent down and asked, "Do you really wanna get into an argument where both your mama and Lane are against you? I wouldn't!"

"Coward."

"I'm not a coward. I'm just not _stupid_."

"Even if you're from Gopher Flats?" Adam teased as he approached them, glad to be back home. He and his mother had tried to make themselves scarce the last couple of days to facilitate more real communication between the Allens, but -- oh god, he was becoming an old fart dad or something -- he'd just wanted to be home. 

"Even if!" Cale smiled as Adam held out his hand for Cale to shake. "Kris here didn't tell his mom about going on tour with you. You need to talk to the boy." 

"Ha!" Adam scoffed. "I have no influence over him whatsoever. If I did, his closet would not be full of plaid shirts." 

"Not the plaid again..." Kris muttered. 

"You're not wearing plaid to the wedding, are you?" Adam asked suspiciously.

"I am. Why not?" Kris asked, shrugging. There was more than one way to skin a cat or get Adam so aggravated about clothes that he'd be forced into the closet for a review that usually ended up with him bent over a shoe rack. "In fact, I laid out my clothes already in the closet. I'm set and ready to go. So we can just go out to the grill and--"

Adam shook his head as Lane walked down the hall and flung her oversized bag onto the floor of the foyer. Ouch. He took Kris' hand and began tugging him toward the stairs. "Cale and Lane are perfectly capable of wielding the tongs--"

"That sounds kinky!" Lane chirped as she slid her hand into Cale's. 

"Wasn't that a scene from the Bill Murray movie, Stripes?" Cale asked with a grin. "C'mon, let's go find some tongs."

"I like a good turkey baster myselffffffff--" Kris called out, his voice receding as Adam dragged him up the stairs. The shoe rack awaited. He hid his smile as he told Adam, "Hey, I did pick out a plaid shirt that's mostly white. That's perfect for a wedding, right?"

 

 

"Are you sure the outfit I brought is okay for this wedding?" Kim asked Leila as they chatted in the slowly filling coffee house where Kris was playing tonight. She was so excited. 

"Absolutely. It's not a black tie affair." Leila shrugged. "Anyway, it doesn't matter. It's a small wedding, just family and friends with no press. Well, inside anyway. Adam and Kris will go to Santa Monica early and slip in a side door to avoid attracting attention and there will be security."

Kim nodded and then laughed. "Well, I guess it's not too much different than the last wedding at the community center where they hired bouncers to keep out some family members who have a tendency to drink and shoot." 

"You must be Mrs. Allen."

Kim looked up and smiled automatically at the man who'd sat down next to her, about her age in what back home they'd call a sharp suit. She glanced around him as she noted her son rushing up to the table. "And you are..." 

"Mom, this is Geoffrey Brush. He's the guy getting married tomorrow and Adam's manager and..." Kris paused to look at the older man, wondering how to describe his relationship to Geoffrey.

"I've looked upon Kris as the son I never had." Geoffrey smiled and patted Kim's hand, smiling at Leila as she excused herself to get a drink. "Thank you for loaning him to me. You've been most generous."

"I've been most stupid," Kim blurted out. "But I woke up and smelled the coffee, so hopefully you'll be seeing more of me in the future."

"I look forward to it." Geoffrey stood as he saw Teresa, then gently urged his fiancee forward. "This is my fiancee, Teresa."

Teresa held out her hand to shake Kim's and smiled as she looked into Kris' mother's eyes. Adam had been wary about this visit, but she thought the woman seemed genuine. It was probably Adam's famous impatience -- he no doubt wanted Mrs. Allen to overcome decades of indoctrination in a week or two. "We're glad you can join us for our wedding tomorrow."

"I'm glad you invited a stranger," Kim thanked them as both sat down. A striking couple and kind enough to include her on their big day so she wouldn't feel left out. If she remembered correctly, Kris had said something about them being married before and how Adam had somehow set them up to meet at one of his parties and their relationship had taken off. Kris had also said something about Adam being insufferably smug, but she'd paid more attention to Kris using a word like 'insufferably' than the story. So many changes. 

"Nonsense!" Geoffrey waved his hand. "You're Kris' mother and therefore, no stranger. Kris has spoken of you often."

"Yech. I shudder to think of what Kris has said." Somehow Kim doubted this sophisticated British man would approve of her Arkansas roots or the way her religion judged people like her own son. It was...weird, being out here and realizing that some of the people she'd been taught to judge badly might be judging her badly. Well, guess you were never too old to learn a lesson. 

"Water under the bridge and all that," Geoffrey dismissed, hoping it was true. Adam had been annoyingly honorable and refused to gossip about Kris' mother beyond saying that he hoped she would prove reliable and that Kris would open himself up to trusting her again. And he'd been unable to get more out of him because Adam wanted to stay mostly sober to show Cale how to argue with the sound guy. As if Adam was going to actually surrender his arguments with the sound guys on tour. Ha. And honestly, what the bloody hell kind of time with Adam was it if the boy wasn't going to drink enough to give a good gossip or tell him anything about the toast he had been planning? He was starting to get a bit afraid.

"I'm sorry," Kim began. "But even though I'm going to your wedding, I still don't understand how you know Kris?"

"Adam was right, Kris is being annoyingly close-mouthed," Geoffrey observed.

"Must have bloody well killed Adam not to spill every bean Kris has," Lane added with a grin. "Well, good. The boy can use some self-discipline."

"Ha, like he's not already a control freak?" Geoffrey scoffed. "As for Kris' ability to play it clost to th vest, well, it can be a very good attribute for a celebrity's partner, but to answer your question?" He smiled. "Kris interviewed at my company for representation. We were unable to sign him at that time, but given Adam's bad taste or bad luck--"

"Bad luck!" Leila inserted as she rejoined them at the table. 

"Certainly. Bad luck, indeed." Geoffrey smiled at Leila, then patted Kris on the shoulder. "Well, given Adam's bad luck with men, let's say that we were thrilled when Kris walked in--"

"To Starbucks," Kris finished with a roll of his shoulders. "Yeah, Mom's already heard that story, along with everyone else at the table. Geoffrey, by the way, I think you're a little drunk," he warned.

"Adam took me out for a mini-bachelor party before we got here, just the two of us," Geoffrey admitted. "And we all know what it's like when Adam takes one out for a drink."

Teresa smirked. "Yes, I'm surprised you can still walk."

"Ha! I was the very picture of abstemiousness. I will not be hung over on the glorious day when I get my second chance with you, my love." Geoffrey kissed Teresa's hand. She bent forward and kissed his cheek with a happy smile. "Thank god for Adam's meddling ways." 

"Well, that was...sweet." Lane shook her head as she pulled up a chair. "Speaking of which..." She raised an eyebrow at Kris. "Are you two good to go?"

Kris nodded and looked over to where Adam and Cale were fiddling with the sound board. He grinned in their direction. He didn't blame the sound guy. The way Adam had walked over to him... well, if Kris were the sound guy he'd have taken a different approach. Maybe later tonight...

When Kris proved too interested in staring at Adam to answer Lane, Geoffrey smiled smugly, then leaned over to Kim. "Are you looking forward to hearing Kris tonight?"

"I am!" Kim said enthusiastically. "Back in Arkansas, I tried to attend all of his shows. I miss his singing."

"He's grown quite accomplished at these gigs," Geoffrey told her. "I'm sure you'll be happy at how greatly improved he is. He has a nice following here. Did he tell you that he could have signed onto more gigs here if he wanted?"

"Geoffrey..." Kris sighed. "I don't want to have that argument again."

"It's Hannah that argues with you about it. Not I. Remember?" 

"Yeah, I suppose that is true." Kris nodded and looked down at his feet. Geoffrey was the one who advocated flexibility. "I apologize."

Kim slanted a look at Kris. The boy looked mulish. Again. What had happened to her easygoing son? She forced a smile to her lips and looked up at Geoffrey. "No, he didn't tell, me, but I'm sure he has his reasons."

Kris nodded. "Ha! Thanks, Mom. Actually, I do. With Adam's schedule and now with volunteering at the school, I wanna keep my schedule flexible. Plus I like my job at the bar just fine. I have friends there, family really. As for the singing -- I think they'd get bored with me if I were here all the time. Seems like if you are too available, people get bored and move on."

Teresa winked. "I know playing hard to get has worked for me."

"A valid strategy," Geoffrey agreed with a hug for his fiancee, while looking at Kris. "And all that matters is that this plan works for you, no matter what anyone else might think."

Kim glanced up at Geoffrey, unsure if he was directing that comment at her, her absent husband, or just making small talk. Or... judging by the way Kris seemed to subside at Geoffrey's conciliatory words, maybe he was just calming down a performer before he got on stage. "Oh, I get it. Kris always did get a little uptight before he performed."

"Geez, Ma, tell all my secrets," Kris complained, but with a grin. He had almost forgotten how his mother used to have to help him find his center before he'd perform in the early days. She had been the best mother ever. Maybe, now, he was going to get her back. 

"Now where's Adam?" Teresa asked Geoffrey. "Did he just dump your tipsy ass off and leave? Or, let me guess. He's arguing with the sound guy?"

Tommy interjected as he joined them, "Arguing? He _took over_ for the sound guy! The sound guy took one look at Adam coming at him and left in a hurry. Or maybe a huff."

Everyone but Kim burst out laughing. "It was inevitable," Geoffrey finally explained to her. "Adam is the most persnickety person about sound and when it comes to Kris' sound, it had better be perfect or else."

 

"Did you enjoy yourself tonight?" Adam asked Kris as they brushed their teeth. 

"Youb bessha! Puufect! Musish wahn grat, ma mom waz dere, you were shmiling at me da whole dime...Puufect!" Kris nodded happily, then spat out a mouthful of toothpaste. He grinned over at Adam, who was chuckling. Well, why not? It had been a great night. He had been on fire musically, the audience had been into it, and his mom had been there to see it, see that he wasn't a failure. Good times. 

Shaking his head at himself and pointing at Kris' white-foam mouth, Adam said, "I am utterly hopeless, because I thought that was cute."

"You are hopeless, dude." Kris rinsed his mouth, took a step closer to Adam and wrapped his arms around him from the back. Kissing a path from shoulder blade to shoulder blade, he laughed. "And I'm just as hopeless, because I actually thought you arguing with the sound guy tonight was _totally_ hot."

"Arguing?" Adam scoffed as he finished and put his toothbrush away. "The wimp took off running before I even opened my mouth." 

"Okay, so the way you stalked over to him, all ready to argue was totally hot. Or did you miss the part of my sentence where I said I thought it was totally hot?" Kris smiled against the bare skin of Adam's back.

"But I didn't argue with him-- Ow!" Adam squawked when Kris' open mouth on his skin took a nip. 

"You tried to argue with his back." Kris laughed against Adam's warm skin. "You'd argue with a fucking fence post. That's just the way you are. Are you gonna argue with the sound guy on our tour?" Kris asked. He trailed a finger down Adam's spine. "Because if so, can I watch?"

"Didn't you watch on the last tour? Isn't that why you always locked my dressing room door after Sutan left?"

"Nah, it was the glitter." 

"Hmm. All it takes is some glitter? And here I was trying to earn points by spending all that time trying to convince your mother you weren't some freak in bed."

"How about we -- What? Whaaaat?!" Kris spluttered and put his hands on Adam's hips to spin him around. "What the hell? That did not happen."

"You came in at the end of it. Seriously, I hope you have some major plans for rewarding me once she goes home. Not only do I rein in my natural and, may I add, well-reasoned tendencies toward bossiness where the two of you are concerned--"

"Ha!" Kris squeezed Adam's hips. "This week was reining it in?"

"You know it is. And..." Adam wrapped his arms around Kris and pulled him close. "As I was saying, not only did I not push you and poke you--"

"What do you call what you did this morning in the shower?" Kris asked, his breath hitching as Adam's hands slid over his butt and a finger slowly stroked the cleft os his ass, still damp from a quick post-work shower before bed.

"I thought that was less of a poke and more of a you choosing to impale yourself on me. Your choice." 

"All my fault?"

"We have to take responsibility for our own _choices_ ," Adam said primly, even as he slid his finger inside of Kris' body and brushed the spot that...oh yeah... Kris was writhing against him already. "Speaking of which, about your mother's ideas of gay sex--"

"You did not talk to my mother about whether I was a freak in bed." Kris laughed, then seeing the amused glint in Adam's eyes, shrieked. "OHMIGOD! Why did you bring that up? To my mother?"

" _I_ didn't!" Adam protested. " _She_ started it." 

 

__

_"Can I ask you a question?" Kim twisted her hands in her lap, then watched as Adam carefully put the wedding rings he was responsible for back into his pocket._

_Adam smiled and patted the small box to make sure it was safely in place. He had to keep track of them for two days. "Of course."_

_"Do you... believe in marriage?"_

_"I would, if I could."_

_"Was that a Dr. Suess answer or..."_

_"No. I meant I_ would _believe in marriage, if I_ could _get married."_

_"Oh. So..." Kim pressed on. She had her son's best interests at heart, so she was going to keep asking. "Since you can't get married, legally, do you....well, do you..."_

_"Just ask, Mrs. Allen," Adam said, knowing his tone was starting to get impatient and reeling himself back in._

_"Okay. Since you can't get legally married, does that mean you and Kris have a, well, an open type relationship?"_

_"Excuse me?"_

_"Well, I mean, you hear tell about how gays are always flitting from guy to guy every night and..." Kim froze at the look of anger on Adam's face._

_"Not only am I way too jealous to have that sort of relationship, I'm also someone who believes in monogamy, so that's a rather insulting comment." Adam knew his voice was tight as he glared at Mrs. Allen._

_Kim glared back. "Well, the truth is that Kris was caught out because he was meeting some stranger in a bar in Little Rock to have sex, so if even my baby could do...that, well, then! What am I supposed to think?"_

_Taking a deep breath and counting until he thought he could avoid snapping Kris' mom's head off, Adam closed his eyes. "You_ could _think it's not much different than the many heterosexual people who go to bars to pick up sex partners."_

_"Not people I know..."_

_"_ Ha! _I bet there are people you know doing just that. Or hooking up using Craigslist. After all, what was that guy who outed Kris doing outside that bar anyway? I don't think it was a coincidence, even if Kris does."_

_"Do you think..." Kim mused. Hmm. There's a thought. That guy had been so damn eager to out Kris._

_"Or you could think that maybe Kris was looking for a sexual partner in a bar, because that was his best option at the time. Because he had no chance of finding a real partner by his family or friends introducing him to a nice guy and then going on dates and seeing if it was going to work out."_

_Seeing the frustration and honesty in Adam's eyes, Kim took a deep breath and considered what he said. It was only fair to consider what he said. And apply his idea to her son. Well. It made more sense to believe her son wanted a real relationship with a guy than to think he was some sort of slut. At least the first idea was in line with how he'd been raised, just... with a different gender for a partner. She nodded. "Is that what you two did?"_

_"Well, yeah, except we weren't introduced to each other. We met each other and introduced ourselves, which is something grown ups do." Hearing the condescending tone in his voice, Adam swallowed and smiled apologetically. "Sorry. I'm truly sorry. I get wound up when it comes to this insulting idea that gay people are somehow different in what they want or need. What I see is that when you force people to repress who they are, you can't blame them for not being open about what they want or need."_

_Kim opened her mouth to argue, then shut it. She recognized a truth when she heard it. "I get it. Good point. Let me ask you this. What do_ you _want or need?"_

_Sitting back abruptly as Kim seemed to change the subject to him, Adam considered her closely. "Are you... Oh. I see. Is this all about asking my intentions toward Kris?" He was totally going to have to talk to Cale about his intentions with Lane. Oh yes, he was. Just to watch Lane go ballistic later._

_"Well, you'd be lucky to get him!"_

_"I know that. I think that every day," Adam said quietly. This was more like it. A man's mom should think he was a catch. "What else? There's this look on your face. You're conflicted about something? What is it?"_

_"Honestly?"_

_"Honesty is the best policy."_

_"Honestly, I... Well, I've heard so much about how gays... do perverted...things all the time, with everyone. And I think that was what in part upset me about Kris. That he was engaging in... creepy scary stuff with all sorts of strangers."_

_Covering his mouth to hide his grin, Adam looked away. About the kinkiest stuff Kris was into was edible glitter._

_"Are you laughing at me, young man?" Kim asked sharply. "I may not know everything about gay relationships, but I do know I don't need attitude from you."_

_"I apologize. It's just... Kris as some pervert? I mean, c'mon! He wears plaid and white soled sneakers!" Adam laughed again, then reined himself back in. Mrs. Allen's question was actually important and he had to give her credit for being honest and asking a question that obviously made her uncomfortable in an effort to ascertain the truth. "Okay, first, I'll give you points for calling me a _young_ man! And secondly, you don't have to worry about Kris being a creep. He's a good boy."_

_"He always was," Kim agreed. "It's just... it was a shock and I'm tryin' to make sense of it."_

_"I know and I"m sorry I was impatient. Kris... he knows how he was raised. He was paranoid about anyone thinking he was a slut and he still worries about people thinking he's sleeping with me to futher his career. Let me assure you that he's neither. He truly is a good man." Adam reached out and curled his hand around Kim's fist, gently urging her to open her fingers, then holding it loosely as he looked into her eyes. "And thirdly, my intentions toward Kris? To make him happy. I adore him. He is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with."_

_"Why? Why Kris? What does he have that you you want or need?"_

_"Well, aside from the fact that he's awfully cute..." Adam winked. "He's fun, he makes me laugh."_

_"I hear him laughing with you," Kim agreed wistfully, wishing Kris was ready to laugh like that with her again. Patience, she told herself, patience. She was asking for Kris to make a huge leap of faith into a second chance._

_"We each think the other is endlessly amusing. I like getting him wound up."_

_"Because you also like winding him down," Kim surmised._

_"Bingo. They're equally fun."_

_"You also like that..." Kim paused as she decided how to say it. "Okay, you like taking care of him when he needs it, which is..." Her husband would have said that was proof that Kris was not a man, but she thought he was wrong. Kris had survived some tough times, very tough times, and he might be a prickly porcupine sometimes these days, but he was not only a man, he was their son._

_"Which is what he does for me too, when I need it. We fill in each other's blanks, you know what I mean?"_

_"I think I do. So... if you don't mind me asking... How do you need taking care of?" Kim asked, surprised. Adam seemed so... together._

_"I had some trust issues when we first met and he helped me overcome them. Once I got over that, well, I was smart enough to know that fate was giving me a second chance at reinventing my love life and well, my life -- since who you love has a huge impact on your life, doesn't it?" Adam stared hard at Kim Allen, whose love for her husband had such a direct impact on her children's lives. Thank god, he had chosen more wisely with Kris -- their children would have a loving father. Oh god. Children. Plural. What was his life these days?_

_"What do you mean?" Kim asked, leaning forward, then forcing herself to sit back. She'd never expected that talking to her son's boyfriend, boyfriend... let alone, his famous rock star boyfriend from California ... would be this easy. But it was. He was an easy guy to talk to, no wonder Kris -- who for all that he was easy going didn't necessarily exchange home truths with new people -- had hit it off with him so fast over a cup of coffee._

_"I had a bad habit of being attracted to... well, flashy guys I met in loud clubs. Not soft-spoken guys in plaid and sneakers who I met in Starbucks over a muffin while my PA cut up magazines for my mother's scrapbooks. But there was something about him, something fun and tart and sweet all at the same time, that made me look and look again. And I've never stopped looking and listening."_

_Kim smiled. "I've noticed the way you look at him. And then again, it's reciprocal since I see the way he looks at you."_

_"It never gets old, you know? Every time I see him I still get a little thrill..." Adam touched his chest. "And yet at the same time, he calms me. I'm not nearly as easy-going as Kris. I can get really wound up and he..." Adam smiled. "He calms me. He's like this... solid warmth that just makes me feel safe and..." He paused, looking for the right word, the word that would make Kim Allen see the truth. "I know. Right from the beginning, he made me feel like every day is a new start, a fresh start. Like my life was a clean slate to start over. Clean, you know? A second chance...It's..." Adam smiled and nodded. "The second chance is the sweetest--"_

_"Great line!" Kris exclaimed as he walked in and went straight over to the refrigerator. "I'm gonna write it down for a lyric. Now who's up for pie?"_

__

 

The sky was perfectly blue and cloudless. Wiping the sand out of her eyes, Kim pulled back the sheer curtains on the window and looked out at a clear blue sky held up by the spikes of those tall narrow green tree-bush things that encircled everyone's back yard out here. Oh and there was a palm tree. 

She yawned and wondered why she'd woken up so early when a faint laugh that sounded familiar made her smile. Looking down, she smiled again as she saw her son on the deck of the pool, laughing with Adam. The two boys were fooling around, engaging in horse play just like normal guys, pushing and pulling each other into the water, splashing... And she froze. Normal. Normal? 

Her son... She forced herself to watch. Kris was swimming backwards, obviously not trying too hard to get away from Adam who with his much longer body, easily closed the distance in the pool. The second Adam got close enough to grab Kris, Kris shoved a sheet of water towards him, causing Adam to cry out and then slam his body onto the surface of the water, making waves, laughing loudly while Kris flailed. Reaching out to Kris, Adam laughed as Kris climbed onto him like a monkey, then laughed happily when Kris cupped his cheeks and gave him what was clearly a happy kiss. 

She lifted her hand to her face, unconsciously feeling the strain of her smile muscles. Yes, she was smiling. Because her son looked happy. Free. That was it. He looked free. In a way she realized that she had not seen before. Ever, really. Because he had been hiding, trying to hide, to compensate, to avoid.... And yet in this little slice of time she had seen freedom on his face. All from a simple kiss. 

And the look on Adam's face. Well, the boy obviously adored her son. He looked at him as though he were something precious and wonderful. Then again, why shouldn't he? Love was always precious and wonderful, a gift of grace from God. 

 

"Thank you, Kris." Kim smiled as she opened the door to her guest room not long thereafter and saw her son standing there with a relaxed posture and good humor on his face. "Are you hungry? Could I make you some grits this morning? If you still like them, that is?"

"That'd be awesome! I like them, but never have them," Kris nodded and smiled at what he recognized was an overture by his mother. Well, actually she'd been making a lot of overtures and Lane and Geoffrey were right that she'd stop trying if he didn't start accepting them. "I can't wait. Honestly."

He smiled again, unconsciously this time as walked in and put a new stack of towels on the bed in the guest room the next morning. Adam and Leila had both urged him to be more open with his mother and he was going to try. What did he have to lose? He turned to face his mother who was smiling back at him. "I wanna thank you for talking to me straight about what an opportunity that world tour is. I was bein' dog in the manger about it and that was just stupid."

"I guess you needed your mama to slap some sense into you."

"I guess there is nothin' like a mama to slap some sense into a man," Kris agreed as he touched the bed, remembering another time he could've used some sense. Thank god, Adam had followed him in here that time. Then again, if Adam hadn't been so damn bossy to begin with... Then again, he did like it when Adam was bossy most of the time. And... his mother was looking at him weird. "I, I, I'm real glad you came out here to visit, Mom."

"Me, too, but what was that look at the bed?" Kim asked, having never seen it on her son's face before. It was...tender. 

"Oh." Kris felt himself blush. "Truth is, Adam and I had a fight a little bit ago and I... well, kinda ran away."

"You still do that?" Kim shook her head. "Krissy, what was cute when you were five is not so cute in an adult man..."

"I know, I know. A man stands and fights." Kris squared his shoulders.

When Kris said nothing more, Kim asked curiously, "So what does this bed have to do with you running away?"

"Well, I ran away. To the guest room." Kris' lips quirked up. "Real far." 

Staring at Kris, Kim nodded slowly as she came to a realization. "Because you wanted to be caught? Or because you didn't want to go too far from Adam, even if you were having a fight."

"Yup. Both. I went twenty feet. And Adam followed me in here. He's incredibly persistent. He kept following me around, apologizing and trying to talk to me."

"That's what you wanted, isn't it? For him to follow you?" Kim surmised, based on a comment Cale had made about Kris being angry with him when they'd reconnected because Cale hadn't pestered Kris long enough.

"I did. I didn't even know it, not consciously. But he did, he figured it out and did it."

"Let me get this straight? The man not only apologized, but was able to figure out what you wanted after a fight and do it --- all without you hinting or telling?"

"That's right..." Kris tilted his head in puzzlement at his mother. 

"Did he do it grudgingly?"

"Of course not! Adam's a grown ass man, he doesn't behave like a two year old."

"You're serious. He apologized of his own free will and then figured out what you wanted, needed and did it?"

"Well, let's not get too excited. He wouldn't have needed to do that if he hadn't screwed up to begin with -- ow!" Kris held his arm where his mother had swatted him. "What was that for?"

"Oh, like you're perfect, Kristopher Allen? Like you've never screwed up and needed to be forgiven?"

Kris rubbed the back of his neck and looked down. "You're right."

"Of course, I'm right. We all screw up, we all sin and need to repent and hopefully, if we're lucky and work hard at it, we reconcile. And lemme tell you another thing I'm right about. A man who apologizes and then figures out what you need and gives it to you? That man's a keeper, a keeper, son! You hold on to him."

Grinning, Kris agreed. His mother not only approved of Adam, she was approving of a man. Praise Jesus and pass the butter, grits and good times were coming. "Oh, I'm never gonna let him go. He's mine forever. The minute it's legal, I'm gonna put a ring on it." 

 

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness the re-joining of Geoffrey and Teresa..." The officiant smiled at the small cloud of witnesses gathered on the beach.

"Hurry up," Geoffrey urged, grinning as the guests laughed at his eagerness. "I wasted too much time already. I want to get started on the rest of my life immediately."

"As do I," Teresa agreed. "When you get a second chance, you have to grab for it and hold on."

Adam looked over his shoulder at Kris and smiled. Lane elbowed Hannah and raised her brows curiously. That smile of Adam's had been pleased, nervous and secretive all at the same time. Hannah shrugged, as mystified as Lane was. Lane licked her lips nervously. What was Adam up to now? He'd been preoccupied with the whole Mrs. Allen situation amidst making the final prep for the tour and had muttered under his breath on more than one occasion about the problems he was having writing a toast, using the word magic and rings and balancing act. Oh dear god, had he hired some sort of circus performers? 

A glad cry arose and Lane realized she'd missed the short ceremony for worrying. Well, that was stupid. Adam wouldn't bring circus performers to the beach, would he? She kept looking around during the cocktail hour that began immediately, laughing along with everyone as corks from champagne bottles popped and bubbles tickled palates. Adam would have to make his toast soon...

"Time for the rest of my best man duties," Adam noted to Kris as he stood up and Kris hurried toward the small stage at the edge of the tent. Pitching his voice to the room, he announced, "Instead of a traditional toast, I'd like to propose something different."

"Of course you would!" Geoffrey laughed, wondering what plan Adam had devised. 

"What is it?" Teresa asked excitedly as Adam moved toward the small stage. "Is it a song? Oh my." 

As both men sat down on a stool and Adam adjusted the microphone and Kris picked up his guitar, everyone murmured excitedly. Adam smiled at the couple and explained. "I was working on this toast and struggling with it. I wanted it to be perfect--" 

Adam broke off as Geoffrey interjected, "Well, that's a shocking turn of events, utterly shocking!"

The small group of family and friends who'd become a family laughed as Adam held up his hand and shook his head. "I wanted it to be perfect because there is nothing so perfect as the imperfect road that leads us back to our destiny when we get distracted or lost or confused, that second chance that fighting for the right fate gives us. That sweetness of hope." 

Kris nodded at his mother, then looked down at his guitar, taking a deep breath. He and Adam had spent many a late night and early morning hour perfecting this song, the first duet they'd written together and ever sung together publicly. He looked up, finding Adam's gaze on him and they nodded in unison and began to sing. 

The white tent on the beach, softly lit with flickering candles their danger contained behind safety glass, seemed to hold its breath, as the two men sang a song, their voice alternately soft and hesitant, searching and retreating, then laughing and teasing and in the end, sure and strong as they finished the song they'd written for Geoffrey and Teresa and everyone who sought love in all ways and in all times, past and future, even those who did not know they'd be searching...

_The sweetest chance  
In all life's dance   
Is the second chance..._


	46. Diving in

**Chapter 46: Diving in**

"This time next year, you'll be a dad," Neil announced, relishing the slightly panicked look that streaks across his brother's face. Ha. His always-in-control brother looked panicked. He stabbed his fork into the breakfast sausage with great enjoyment, then grunted when Adam kicks him in the shin. "Must you always wear boots? Can't you take a page from Kris' fashion lexicon and wear sneakers?"

"Surely, you jest." Adam raised an eyebrow and looked over at his father. "Speaking of being a dad, I don't know how I'm going to find the time to fit it all in. I'm already feeling like I don't have enough time and with a baby, how will I..."

"You need to," Eber said quickly. Adam needed to learn to chill. "You're a workaholic and you need to find balance. How are you going to do that?" 

"I don't know, Dad!"

"Well, you'd better start thinking about it!"

"I have been. But I don't have a solution."

"Find one."

"Sure. I'll just ring up the solutions store and have them deliver, oh, I don't know, extra hours in my day to accommodate all of the stuff I'm supposed to do. No problemo!" Adam paused and then put a finger on his chin. "Wait! Do you think they'll give me a discount if I buy hours in high volume multiples?"

"Like you do with cases of lube?" Neil asked, his tone bright. Or as bright as Neil could make his tone. 

"Exactly!" Adam slapped Neil on the back. Perhaps strictly harder than necessary. But what were brothers for? He smiled brightly at Neil as Neil glared at him. "See, Dad. I do know how to manage my money. I take advantage of discounts in high volume purchases of necessities. Like, you know, duuude, luuuube."

Eber threw up his hands and leaned back in his chair. "Why were you just talking -- however and thankfully, briefly -- like a So Cal frat boy?"

"He's like so totally trying out for a rad role on a rad teen soap," Neil drawled in his best imitation of a SoCal surfer slash skater boy. When he spied the identically incredulous looks on his father and brother's faces, he gave up and supplied with a grin. "Totally miscast, if you want my opinion."

"I don't think teens use the word, 'rad' any more," Adam argued. "I was not auditioning for the role of a teenager, don't know if I'd do it anyway, and most importantly, I didn't ask your opinion." 

"But that doesn't mean you don't _want_ it," Neil countered. "We all want things we don't ask for."

Eber snorted. "Yes, because we know it's futile. Somewhat like me wanting to have an early Father's Day brunch with my sons without their bickering taking precedence over my no doubt ill-fated attempt to give Adam some advice."

"Advice?" Adam stopped in the process of raising a glass to his lips. "Was there advice in there somewhere? All I heard were directives." 

Eber took a long sip of his drink and reminded himself of a lesson he'd learned long ago. Adam was an immovable object when you pushed too hard. Or, at all. This would be much easier if... "Why isn't Kris with us?"

Neil choked on a bite of croissant at the indignation that suffused his brother's face. And he knew why. Their father was a little too obvious when he wasn't writing obscure poetry. "Why? Because Kris can get Adam to listen and behave?"

"I'd listen, if someone...." Adam pointed at his father. Why had he thought taking his father out for an early Father's Day brunch since the tour would be in full swing on the actual Father's day was a good idea? "Was giving me actual advice."

"Oh. You actually want my advice?" Eber grinned. "This is a good early Father's Day indeed, then." 

"Of course, I do!" Adam rolled his eyes. "You're the best dad I know."

Eber smiled. "Thanks. This is truly a good Father's Day. Let me think, though." He tapped his fingers on the table and then nodded. "I know where to start. 'Our doubts are traitors.' You have to believe you can, then you can."

"Did you seriously just quote Shakespeare at me?" Adam asked. 

"Well, the second half sounded like something Geppetto would say or maybe Jiminy Cricket," Neil observed. "And I'm already a real boy."

"Nah, you're a donkey. In other words, an ass." Adam smirked. 

Eber sliced his hand through the air, then pointed at Adam. "Okay, here's my first piece of advice. Have only one child." 

"Ha. And that would've been _me!_ " Adam crowed triumphantly.

"That's not what I meant..." Eber sighed. Patience. "Let's start over. The Shakespeare quotation was from Measure for Measure. Take this big life change step by step. If you break it down into steps, it's not so scary. So what's the first step?"

Adam sighed and closed his eyes in relief. His father was going to talk him through this. "Well, I'd say it's about figuring out your goals and then making a strategy to achieve them."

"Exactly." Eber clapped Adam on the shoulder. "Good boy. The first step is all about priorities. And your children have to be priority number one." 

 

 

"We only have one son. His name is Daniel. One son," Neal announced. "That's that. Over. Done. Conversation ended."

"Well, bless your heart for thinking you can tell me when a conversation's over." Kim clenched her fingers around the edge of the counter of her own kitchen island as she confronted her husband. She had probably never argued with him so long before. But then again, nothing had ever been this important. "And bless your heart for thinking you can tell me how many children _I_ have. I graduated kindy -- I can count, thank you very much!" 

"Are you giving me lip?" Neal asked, wondering why he was still surprised. He should've known after she lit out for California without getting his permission. After Kim had somehow gotten it into her head that their lost son might be found again -- but on his terms -- she'd been impossible. And wrong, so very very wrong. 

"Are you asking me if I'm giving you lip? I'm not a child. I'm an adult and a mother. A proud mother, proud of our son for finding his way on his own, succeeding -- in music. I can't wait until Adam's tour comes to Memphis and we can all go see Kris on stage. You always rode him hard about making a success out of himself annd now he has! What more do you want?"

"What do I want? I want you to stop carrying on about how successful our pervert son who isn't our son is these days. Everyone thinks you're ridiculous. Because everyone but you can see the truth. Open your eyes. He's not successful. Unless you consider it successful to spread your legs and open your mouth to get a job. Face it. He's a wh--"

"Do not dare use that language with me!" Kim choked out, holding back her tears. No wonder Kris had used that word, he'd been channeling his own father. "He's our son. That's true. But he and Adam are a couple, a real couple. He's not a pervert. He's a good boy!"

"The things he does--"

"Ha! Heterosexual people do that stuff too!" Kim flung the words at her husband. 

"How do you know that?"

"Google! And Craigslist!"

"Google? Google? Craigslist?"

"Yes. Adam was right! And I think I recognized some of the phone numbers!" Yes, she did think she had. Including some of the people who'd felt it their Christian duty to tell her she'd done wrong by going to visit her own son and how they hoped being "out there" and staying with "that freak" hadn't hurt her chances of being a chosen one. She had to stay focused on what true Christian duty was -- to love God and others. Focus, Kim. Stay strong. 

"You looked up that sort of perversion? Because that that that..." Neal spluttered, then took a breath. "That dirty creepy freak who corrupts all that is good and holy told you to?" Neal shook his head and pointed his finger at Kim. " _My_ wife will not--"

"Dirty creepy freak? Adam? He's a sweet boy who loves our son. And he made me an omelette! Or tried to, anyway." Stabbing her own finger into the air near Neal's face, Kim snapped, "I am not just _your_ wife. I am... myself. And Kris' mother. If I want to look up stuff, I will. I think--"

"Oh no, oh no. This is what happens when you leave home. You get ideas. You... You think!"

Kim glared at her husband. Had he always acted like this? Who was he? "You sound ridiculous."

" _I_ sound normal. _You_ sound crazy. Like you don't care that Kris is headed straight for hell and so are you!" 

"Pfft! Crazy for loving our son? And wanting to have a relationship with him?"

"I don't even know you any more!" Neal accused. "What happened to the God-fearing good woman who knew what was right and what was wrong? Who knew that she had to cut off the part that offends her?"

"I still know what is right. God said--"

"I know what God said about sinners--"

"Well, so do I! I also know what Jesus said." Kim slapped her hands on her hips to keep from slapping her husband upside the head. "And Jesus said that the most important commandments were to love God and to love each other. That's what I'm tryin' to do!"

Neal stared at his wife. He didn't think he'd ever seen her this riled up before. Well, she'd get over it. Now that she was home and away from those crazy California people and their lost son, she'd get back to normal. "What's for dinner?"

 

 

"Want a snack?" Kris asked as he looked in on Adam, who was sitting in the living room, staring at his lap top. He'd given him an hour to cool off and that was enough. Especially since Adam had refused to take his advice to swim. Or have sex. Kris knew he was probably still pouting about that because angry Adam was so hot his trigger had immediately been tripped into the 'do me now' part of the dial, but at least their kitchen was spotless. Sexual frustration had its uses. Not that he had much experience with it since Adam was usually and quite literally up for anything. "It's ice cream."

"Yes, thank you." Adam looked up and stared, at first unseeingly at the doorway, then he blinked and saw Kris, standing there, holding out a bowl of ice cream. He forced a smile and held out his hands, wiggling his fingers. He'd happily take Kris -- just wearing a pair of shorts -- over the ice cream, but he knew a peace offering when he saw it. "I'm sorry I snapped before." 

Kris hurried forward and handed Adam the ice cream. "Now, eat. Then, talk." He rubbed his hand over Adam's shoulder, feeling the tightness there as Adam obediently -- for once -- ate his ice cream. The treat was probably a poor substitute for punching Brian in his stupid ugly lying ugly stupid face, but it would have to do. 

Adam smiled as he ate his ice cream. Love was in the details like choosing his favorite flavor and his favorite bowl. "You're a good man, Kris Allen." 

Kris just wished he could do more. Adam had come back from the meeting with the lawyers and Brian to hand off the check in a mood that the word, 'lousy' did not begin to describe. "Once again, you need to stop contemplating ways to kill the asshole." 

"Why? I'm still enjoying it. It's ca _thar_ tic." Adam set the bowl down, licked the spoon, then looked at it. "You know, there's an old episode of Alias -- you know how Lane makes us watch that on tour -- and Marshall the tech guy ends up having to remove some dead guy's eye with a spork. A spoon would work too." 

_Clang!_

Adam flung the spoon into the bowl and watched it rotate around the edges before settling down, off center. 

"Okay." Kris nodded and flopped down next to Adam. He swung his legs over Adam's lap and leaned his head back against the arm rest of the couch. "Lemme know when you've moved from thoughts of dismemberment to solving the problem." 

"I hate it when you're all calm when I'm all... un-calm." Adam shook Kris' ankles in his hands and squeezed. 

Kris wiggled his toes and laughed. "It's my job." 

"Sucks."

"Not yet. You turned me down, remember?" Kris winked.

Adam laughed, his anger melting away as he knew Kris intended. Kris had known to leave him alone too, not something that normally was the best choice, but had been today. Kris knew him so well, it was almost like the gods had given him Sparks Notes or something. If only he had insider information on how Kris would feel about this solution. He slowly moved his eyes up Kris' body to his face, to the warm brown eyes that were waiting for him so patiently. "I love you."

"You love me. This I know." Kris smiled when Adam's hands gentled and began stroking up his legs. "So..."

"I was thinking..." Adam began slowly, then paused. Kris might hate the idea and agree to it just to make Adam happy and he didn't want that. How should he phrase it? 

"Uh-oh."

"You always say that."

"You're always thinking. Thinking leads to trouble." Kris opened his eyes to stare into Adam's, smiling when he saw the anger had dissolved to be replaced by affectionate amusement and determination. "But you know what? So was I."

"Well, that _is_ news. Let me call Ryan, he's been bugging us for a joint interview for months now--"

"Jerk." Kris nudged Adam's arm with his knee. Adam knew the last thing Kris ever wanted to do was be featured on E! News. Kris shuddered at the thought. He loved his mostly nondescript life just fine the way it was. It was perfect, in fact. And with the baby coming in a few months, after the tour ended God willing, their lives would be better than perfect. 

"You love me." Adam curled his hand around the inside of Kris' upraised thigh and squeezed lightly. Kris' disgust with entertainment 'reporting' was immutable. "So tell me your great thought." 

Kris took a deep breath, then began, his words rushing, "I think we should buy a house with another section or wing or guest house or something for Danielle and her baby and all live together." 

Adam stared at Kris, then began to laugh. Of course, that's what Kris was thinking. 

"It's not that stupid an idea!" Kris snapped, sitting up to shove at Adam's shoulder.

"No, it's not. In fact, it's brilliant." Adam pulled his laptop around and pointed at the screen.

Kris leaned forward and laughed when he saw the page of real estate listings. "You had the same idea!"

"Of course. That's why it's brilliant." Adam wrapped his arm around Kris and pulled him up, smiling when Kris automatically straddled his legs and settled on top of him. Why had he refused having sex with Kris when he got home? Oh yeah, he'd been furious. But he was in control now. He moved his hands from Kris' hips to his bare legs, firmly stroking the inside of Kris' thighs.

"We have the tour starting in two weeks. We should--" Kris hitched a breath as Adam's fingertips grazed his cock which had started getting interested the minute Adam had pulled him on top of him. "Yeah. We should get going on this. Picking a house. So... oh god..." He shoved his hips forward, seeking more of Adam's touch. Teasing bastard. He laughed. "So -- I'm gonna get this out--"

"Words are not what I want you to get out..." Adam retorted, skimming his fingertips along the waistband of Kris'shorts. 

"No, sweetie..." Kris groaned and reached for the buttons on Adam's shirt. "We should get going on picking a house so Dani and your mom can get it ready while we're on tour. That way we wouldn't have to live through it, so--" 

"It can wait a minute. Or two." Adam said as he moved one hand up over Kris' abdomen to play with his nipples, while the other hand lightly stroked the growing bulge in his shorts.

Kris laughed as he wiggled closer and deeper onto Adam's lap. "Why were you hesitating, though?"

Resting his head on Kris' shoulder, Adam turned his head and kissed Kris' neck. He explained, "It seems like a great solution because I can be a better father --"

"And me a better uncle." Kris slid his hands along Adam's broad shoulders and then to his neck, playing with the soft edges of his hair, feeling the responsive shivers under his fingertips.

"Right. We can be better parents if we're actually there, rather than having to drive to and fro and make appointments, as it were. But the problem is that I know you like a lot more privacy than I do and I didn't want you to feel obligated to go along with the idea. I don't want you to be miserable in your own home."

Gently massaging the back of Adam's neck, Kris smiled. Poor bossy Adam, being tugged in different directions trying to solve every problem. "I won't be with the idea of some separate space for her. And then Danielle would be here when you're in one of those moods when you want to be with others and I want time alone. I remember you telling me once that you don't actually like living alone and away from your friends. So this would be perfect. And Danielle might want some privacy too. That's why the idea of the separate space would work. We all could have our own areas, but then communal areas, and we could help her when she needs it. You'd love having your best friend here. She could take care of the house when we go on tour. It would be perfect for everyone." 

"Perfect." Adam stared down at Kris. That was quite a speech for him. And full of truth. "Untraditional living arrangement, but perfect for us."

"That's what matters. What works for _us._ " 

"Yes." Adam enfolded Kris in his arms. They both smiled as their lips met and clung and met again, kissing until they were both nearly breathless. When Kris began to grind down on him and Adam began to thrust up into Kris' spread buttocks, Adam pulled back. He shook his head, determined to say what he wanted before he forgot what he wanted to say, he whispered, "Thank you for not feeling threatened by me being an extrovert. And for loving Danielle. I don't know what I ever did to deserve you, but..."

Kris smiled and nuzzled into Adam's neck. Kissing his way up the strong column, he said, "Is this where we break into that song from The Sound of Music about how we must've done something good in the past?"

"We could." Adam slid his hand up Kris' leg and then cupped his cock and balls through jeans that had grown too tight as they kissed. "Or we can do something good right now?"

"Look at real estate list... _eeeengs?_ " Kris hears his voice squeak on the last syllable, but what else could he do when Adam is scratching his balls through his jeans? Oh damn, that felt good. 

"Later. " Adam unsnapped the waistband button on Kris' shorts and slid his hands inside. "There are some other tracts of land I'd like to inspect. Ooh, wet already? I like wet."

 

 

"I liked the house with that awesome pool best!" Kris said enthusiastically as he, Adam, Lane and Dani sat at an outdoor table eating dinner after a long day of house viewings. Leila had been with them, but left to go on a date. 

"Between work and the baby, I don't know how I'm going to have much time for swimming..." Adam said absently, pushing his sunglasses down over his eyes. Dani had already whispered to him while they were touring it that it was her favorite house as well. He liked it too. It had a great layout and an even better aura. But right now? Fun times. 

"You should and you will," Kris told him, curling his hand around Adam's arm and squeezing tightly. "You should swim -- it's good exercise and you can use it to blow off steam when you get angry. You already know this. Why do I have to explain it to you again?"

"Thanks, Mom, for the advice." Adam rolled his eyes behind his sunglasses.

Lane grinned. She would bet serious money that the boys would buy the house with the awesome pool and Adam would keep swimming. Kris had a way of getting his way. It usually involved sex. 1, 2, 3...

"We can have sex in that awesome pool," Kris offered. "It has a waterfall and those little...what are they called?"

"Grottoes," Dani supplied. "Little hidey places. Soooo cool."

"So cool for having sex in!" Kris corrected. 

" _Now_ , you're talking." Adam grinned and reached for the sheets of listing information. "Although it's so big, we'd definitely need a pool boy. Hmm, that's an advantage..."

"What? Whaaat? No. We would not need a pool boy!" Kris snapped. "I've watched pool boy porn with you. So, no. No pool boys. Did you hear me? No pool boys."

Adam held one hand up as if in confusion. "Then how ever would our pool get clean?"

"Yeah, Kris." Dani winked at Adam. "I have to agree with Adam about the pool boy. It's a necessity. Some nice tight buns, I mean, boy in a Speedo cleaning my... pool. Oh yeah...."

"Unless, Kris, you'd like to amend that household duties list of yours of which you're so insistent? You could exchange something to add pool boy?" Adam suggested. Looking around to see if anyone was watching or aiming a camera their way, he slid his hand onto Kris' thigh and moved it upward as he said, "I know I'd love to see how you'd wield a vacuum hose."

"I hope you're planning on using lots of chlorine before I come over to visit..." Lane blurted out as Kris giggled and wiggled around in his chair. She so did not want to know what Adam's hand was doing right now.

Dani grinned. "This is not the kind of discussion you see on House Hunters on HGTV." 

"That's because we are way more interesting than the people on House Hunters," Adam said confidently. 

"Well, you are," Kris, Dani and Lane said in unison. 

"I just wear more glitter than the rest of you," Adam demurred,leaning forward to kiss Kris' flushed cheek. He laughed when Kris turned his head and snapped at him. 

"Did you notice...." Kris said, tapping the sheet with the listing for the house with the awesome pool. "That an entire room had been converted into a humungous walk-in closet?"

"I may have..." Adam shrugged and kept his eyes on the sheet and his hand on Kris' thigh. House hunting had been more fun than he'd expected, what with all these opportunities to get Kris going. 

"That was an amazing closet," Dani agreed. 

"All those little drawers -- just think of how you could organize your jewelry. And glitter!" Kris urged loudly. When Dani and Lane mouthed, 'Glitter?' at him, Kris winced. He may have overplayed his hand. 

"It was... acceptable." Adam took a sip of his drink and shrugged nonchalantly. Again. He hoped he was demonstrating insouciance. He liked that word. "Good enough." 

"Are you _crazy_? I think it was bigger than my last apartment!" Kris argued, fidgeting anxiously.

"Speaking of which, are you going to make us move that chair again?" Adam asked with a deep sigh. "Because, really, that thing is so disgusting..." 

"It is, kinda," Dani agreed with an apologetic gesture as Kris stuck out his tongue at her.

"I cannot even begin to contemplate the horrors that occurred on that chair to make it look like that." Lane shuddered. 

"It's meaningful!" Kris protested. 

"Meaningful mushrooms? Maybe to garden gnomes. Ooh, idea." Adam sat up straight and pointed at Lane. "Make a note. See if there is a company that does custom gnomes. We can have one made to look just like Kris. After all, he's about the size of a garden gnome."

"Very funny." Kris rolled his eyes, then seeing the light bulb go off over Adam's head. held up his hand. "No way--"

"Halloween. At our house. It starts out with you as a garden gnome in a tableaux....the grottoes... Oh yeah." 

"No frickin' way!" Kris hissed, crossing his arms over his chest.

"He's gonna do it," Dani whispered to Lane. "He'll totally be a gnome for Halloween." 

"Was there any question?" Lane whispered back, making a note in her calendar to look for a costume designer who could make a gnome outfit.

"Wait." Kris frowned in confusion. "If I'm a garden gnome, who would you be?" 

"Ugh, here they go," Dani said, standing up and resting a hand on her belly. "I need to use the ladies. Again." 

"I'll go with!" Lane offered. 

"Why do girls always do that?" Kris asked as they walked away.

Adam shrugged. "That's a puzzle _we_ 'll never crack. Priorities, hedgehog. So back to Halloween and you as a gnome..."

"How about back to house hunting and that pool?" 

"I have to consider how the pool will fit in with Halloween before I can agree to this house."

"You're not serious."

"Dead serious." Adam put on his best serious face. They all knew they were buying that house, it was onto the important details. "Hmm, do you think we could make the front yard into a graveyard?"

 

"You know..." Lane said as they went into their stalls. 

"That Kris is going to keep that hideous chair?" Dani shivered. 

"Oh well, that's a given," Lane shrugged. "It's his security blanket and Adam will never make him give it up. I meant that by the time we come out, they'll have planned a Halloween party and picked out a house." 

"Hmmm. I don't know about that!" Dani disagreed. "Get Adam talking about Halloween and he can be fixated for hours." 

 

Kris gasped in horror as Adam gestured above his hair. "You are _not_ going to wear a flaming headdress!"


	47. Pyro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note about this chapter: The chapter has flashbacks (in italics) and excerpts from a (fictional) Rolling Stone's article. The chapter begins and ends in present time. **The bolded sections are from a Rolling Stone article about the tour** and _the italicized sections are flashbacks to the tour itself beginning with dress rehearsals._
> 
> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 47: Pyro  
Rating: NC-17**

"It's so damn hot..." Dani moaned, swishing her feet -- her poor swollen feet -- in the cooler water of the pool Kris once called awesome. And it is awesome. Especially in this little grotto with the built-in seats under the shade. She should slide in and let the water hold her up. But then she'd look even more like a whale about to give birth. She rubbed her aching back with a sigh.

"It is," Dani mother, Elaine, agrees, fanning herself while keeping a careful watch on her daughter. 

Dani whined, "Waaaaaaay too hot for October."

"Not as hot as it was that day in Miami," Kris noted, then winced when Dani turned a look on him that should just leave scorched earth, or patio tiles as it were, in her path. Because, dayum, he should've known better than to argue with a pregnant woman.

"Oh the day you and Adam sucked face in front of a gazillion paparazzi, Mr. I-Don't-Like-PDAs but climb Adam like a tree in public?" Dani snarked, enjoying the way Kris somehow turned even redder under his tan. "Then again, given the way you two were looking at each other in the pre-kiss pictures, it was lucky Lane was there to keep you two from sucking other things in front of the paparazzi--"

"ADAMMMM!" Kris and Elaine yelled at the same time, looking at each other in a panic. Dani was getting on a roll and no one wanted that because these days the roll usually ended up in tears. 

"Her drink?!!" Kris yelled again. 

"ADAMMMM!" Yelling because, screw it, it felt good to yell, Dani drew another breath and then let it expel -- loudly, because that felt good too, when Adam appeared in a rush at the patio door with her drink and his iPad. "What's that?"

"The Rolling Stone article. I got an advance copy of the story. Hey Kris -- you're in it. Take a look!" Handing his iPad over to Kris, Adam slid into the pool then handed Dani her disgusting drink of choice, a combination of Orange Crush and Root Beer. "Remember, Rolling Stone was going to do a piece on the tour?"

"Yeah. How your tour was successful in a year when most weren't even though you took the risk of booking larger venues... " Dani sniffled. "My fault. You took a risk to finish up earlier so you could be back here..." She rubbed one hand over her distended tummy and sniffled some more. 

"Which paid off. There is little reward in life without taking risk," Adam said softly, patting Dani's hand. His mother and hers had reassured him that the mood swings were normal, but dayumm... And now she was smiling as if she hadn't been crying a moment ago. Okeydokey.

Dani nodded. "And weren't they also doing a piece on musician managers like Geoffrey -- weren't you interviewed for both at the same time?" Dani sighed as the drink slid down her throat, icing it against the heat. "It tastes fantastic, so shut up, Adam."

"I made no comment. Because I am not the sort of idiot who questions anything a nine-month pregnant woman wants." Adam shook his head. His mom and Scarlett Cherry had lectured him plenty. He could, on occasion, follow directions. Especially when he had a feeling his life depended upon it. 

"Oh fuckityfuckfuckfuck!" Kris exclaimed from his chair, then blushed over his iPad. "Sorry, Elaine. Sorry."

Elaine laughed. "I've had Dani and Adam and their friends in my life for a long time, young man, I think I can handle the language."

"What is it?" Dani asked, sucking down her drink. "You're looking very hedgehoggy."

"That's not a word," Elaine corrected automatically. "But Dani is right. What's wrong?"

"I...uh... feature more in this story than I wanted to. Adam, I didn't mean--" Kris began in a rush, then continued apologizing. 

"He's flustered and floundering." Dani lifted her feet up and watched the water slide over and under them. Like her life right now. She was just waiting and letting life slide around her. "Know the feeling."

"You're not floundering, you're got it all under control. You're just waiting. Different story." Adam patted Dani's leg and nodded absently in Kris' direction as a torrent of Anglo-Saxon words jerked toward them. Goodness, Kris could carry on when he was in a snit about something. "I don't know what he's worried about. There are a few mentions, especially about the Nashville show and the piece about Geoffrey, but it's no big deal. He's a little paranoid about the fame whore business." 

"Don't you think you ought to reassure him that it's okay?" Dani asked. 

"Nah. If I don't, he'll come in here to make sure I'm listening." Adam wiggled his eyebrows at Dani, gratified when she laughed.

"Oh. I get it. And then he'll be all wet."

"A wet Kris is the reason I bought this house," Adam reminded her. "And then maybe, you can--"

Dani laughed. "Tell my mom I want to take a nap with her and you can make Kris give you a tour of the grottoes again?" 

 

**Rolling Stone: Our series on the state of concert touring continues this week with an examination of Adam Lambert's tour, The Curves in the Cosmos Tour. Arguably one of the best live vocalists touring today, Lambert puts on a show that fans consider worth every penny; a pretty penny indeed is Lambert acquiring from this large venue tour, sold out as we went to press. Larger venues mean fewer dates and higher profits, but fewer dates are also an advantage to a singer renowned for challenging even his formidable vocal talents at every gig. Larger venues also enable Lambert to indulge his admittedly over-the-top showmanship. We'll visit Lambert's tour at a large venue to see how his vision translates to the arena settings that comprise the bulk of his dates.**

**Tonight, however, the tour returns to a smaller venue that is personal favorite of Lambert's due to its top-notch acoustics. The differential in size means changes to the show are necessary and last minute modifications are inevitable. Lambert, known as a hands-on manager of his own tour, is deep in the thick of a heated discussion with the tech crew about rearranging his fire element to suit this smaller theater. Because, he tells me in a quick but determined aside, he's not giving up his fire without a fight.**

 

\---- _second dress rehearsal before tour:_

_"So how bad were the fireworks when your mom went back home?" Isaac the drummer asked as they waited for the tech crew to reset the pyro for the millionth time. This second dress rehearsal was supposed to be their last, now that the costumes were actually finished according to Adam's specifications, but he had his doubts. Might as well while away the down time with some honest gossip. "If it's okay to ask."_

_Tommy touched Kris' arm. Kris was the nicest dude, real family-oriented, so he hoped for Kris' sake that this reconciliation with his mom worked out. "How_ is _it going for your mom?"_

_"My mom is tryin' real hard," Kris told them. "But the town--"_

_"I've been there -- Gopher Flats, Hooterville, Petticoat Junction, Cut and Shoot..." Lane interjected. "Shoot Anyone Who's Different, Arkansas..."_

_"Yeah, that." Kris sighed. "She's...uh...she's not saying too much, but the church ladies are givin' her a rough time. Real Christian charity and love at work, ya know."_

_"Well, the good news is that she's now in the prayer circle along with you, as they pray for y'all's salvation," Cale mentioned. "At least you're_ together _on the road to ruin."_

_"Well, that's a comfort to her, no doubt." Kris sighed again, then caught himself. Adam must be real tired of the sighing. "And even if she's not sayin', I'd bet a year's supply of beer that my father's bein' a prize asshole."_

_"Well, that's a given," Cale muttered to Lane. Sometimes he thought Kris got that his father was an asshole, but sometimes he thought Kris didn't_ really _get that his father was the kind of asshole who needed a fire enema._

_"That's awful, Kris. I'm so sorry," Cam commiserated. She began to talk again, then fell silent as she saw the determined glint in Lane's eyes._

_Lane narrowed her eyes. "I'll be blunt. Is she going to be able to withstand the pressure to conform to the rules of Hooterville or is she going to fold?"_

_Kris gaped at Lane, then turned his glare to Cale. He had to have said something. "Cale. What do you know?"_

_Cale sighed. "My mother told me that people are talking. 'Bout--"_

_"I guess this isn't the time to break into that Bonnie Raitt song," Kris quipped in a desperate attempt to make light of the situation, then slumped. "Oh god."_

_Patting Kris on the back, Cale attempted to reassure him. "Listen. I think the worst of it for your mom was the decision that she wanted you back, no matter what and then came out here. She feels she's right now and lord knows, a righteous southern mama is nothing to tangle with."_

_"Speaking of tangling..." Isaac pointed towards the stage. "The tech guys are looking nervous."_

_"Adam is frustrated." Lane stood up and walked toward Adam, just hearing the tail end of the conversation._

_"What is so hard about this? Adam demanded. "Just finish it up. The rest of the crew is here, for godssakes." He stomped back to where his band and Lane were waiting._

\----

**Rolling Stone: Lambert rushes up and apologizes for running late with a charm surprisingly boyish for someone who's been called a 'glamrock sex god' and whose genitalia fans have christened with its own nickname (the "glambulge" in case you're wondering). He's explaining in a blur of words and possibly silver glitter that he needs to have a _discussion_ with the sound guy (his emphasis on the word makes it plausible that he means _discussion_ in the way my parents meant it when they locked themselves in their bedroom and screamed at each other). After promising me time after the show and the meet and greet at the barricades with the fans, he hands me off to his personal assistant, Lane and his touring assistant, Cale. They'll show me around backstage. **

**Lane has been with Lambert since his days on Idol, while Cale has only been in his employ since the tour began, but like everyone else I met there, both are fiercely loyal to the pop singer and his vision for this tour. Lane is quick to detail how Lambert is solely responsible for devising his tour themes and is a perfectionist about ensuring his ideas are executed properly, all in the service of putting on the best possible show for his fans. "Even," Cale inserts with a shudder, "Down to the damn pyro!"**

 

\---- _third dress rehearsal before tour:_

_"We are not really having pyro, are we?" Cam the keyboardist asked as she watched the tech crew set up the stage for the third and hopefully final dress rehearsal. "That last rehearsal didn't go very well...."_

_"Nonsense. We'll have pyro. They just needed to work out the kinks..." Adam answered absently as he turned back around, deciding he couldn't really trust the pyro crew on their own. Perfection should not take this much time. They had less than ten days before the tour started and it had to be perfect. Why was perfection so hard? Honestly._

_"Kinks? Did someone say kinks?" Tommy mumbled as he rubbed his eyes, pushed his pink hair back and nearly fell out of his chair in his rush to get up for fear he'd missed something important._

_"Go back to sleep, Pretty in Pink," Isaac the drummer muttered._

_"Hey, they rhymed." Cale laughed._

_Lane rolled her eyes. "Indeed, they're poet laureates."_

_"What's a poet laureate?" Cale asked._

_"Oooh, you're pretty." Lane patted his cheek and vaulted off her chair to have a word with Adam._

_"Did she just say I was dumb?" Cale asked._

_Kris shrugged. "Well, I'm not the one whose the assistant to the guy who wants pyro on tour. Pyro the way he wants it or else. Nope. I'm just the bass player, not the assistant any more."_

_"Did you know he wanted pyro on this tour?" Cam asked with a suspicious glint in her eyes._

_"You betcha!: Kris slapped Cale on the back. "Oh and look. Adam's pointing at you. He wants you over there. You're gonna be pyro man. Not me. So..." Kris whistled the tune to 'Whistle While You Work.' He stopped to grin. "Did I also mention that I'm a fucking genius?"_

_Looking back at his band, wasting time, Adam ground his teeth, then turned back to the crew. "I want_ cool _fire. Blues, purples, whites, silver. Not red, orange and yellow."_

_"Most people want--"_

_"I am not most people." Adam stared at the lead worker. "Who I am is the person paying your crew -- quite well, I might add. Therefore, what I want is what you'll deliver."_

_As Cale came to a halt next to Adam, Lane nodded. "Indeed. If you can't do it, I'm quite sure there are other companies who can."_

_Adam looked at the large clock on the backstage wall. "We need to be ready to do the dress in thirty minutes, forty-five, tops. Can you do it or not?"_

_"We'll do it."_

_"Excellent. Cale, please stay here and supervise and make sure they get it right." Adam turned around and counted to twenty, then to thirty. "Lane--"_

_"I'm looking up my other contacts right now," Lane told him immediately. She looked up as they reached the band again. "Okay, let's get dressed and get ready."_

 

**Rolling Stone: Cale shows me the racks of costumes, none of them as outre as Lambert's purple top hat with the scarlet "A" emblazoned upon it worn with a fur-trimmed purple satin coat from his first headlining tour, but none of them a plaid shirt, tee-shirt or pair of jeans-- the uniform of post-Nirvana male singers -- either. The costumes range from black to white with forays into midnight blue and silver. They are somewhat less colorful than I was expecting and when I say as much, Cale laughs. He explains that they have LED lights and other "starry" effects sewn into or glued onto them, as part of the overall effect Lambert wants to achieve of being lost and then found somewhere deep in the cosmos.**

**Lambert himself once again hurries up, this time to grab costumes for his opening number, checking the velcro on a pair of pants that Cale calls, with great amusement, 'cock corset pants." What that has to do with the cosmos, Cale is unable to explain and advises that I ask Lambert later on. I have a sneaking suspicion that either Lambert likes the pants, his fans like the pants, or possibly his partner does. In any case, it's clear that Lambert will make his own decisions on his costumes, just as he does with everything else on this tour.**

 

\---- _fourth dress rehearsal before tour:_

_"You're not really wearing the cock corset pants on tour!" Kris yelled as he glanced up as Adam ran up side stairs to the swinging moon on which he made an entrance for the second act. He ignored everyone's groan. Okay this fourth dress rehearsal was supposed to be the final one, but he had issues._

_"See, this is why going to second fittings is a good idea." Lane quirked an eyebrow as she looked up from her stop watch. "If you'd listen to me on occasion, then you'd know important things."_

_"I guess so! Adam, you are not wearing those pants on tour." Kris pointed at Adam's crotch. When Adam raised an eyebrow at him and -- had he actually smirked --_ smirked _\-- at him? Kris felt his blood pressure rise. "I'm serious. I forbid you from wearing those pants in public."_

_Tommy and Isaac hissed in a joint breath, while Lane stared in shock at Kris. Cam sighed, sat down on her stool and opened her phone; she might as well text her girlfriend while the boys had their fight._

_"Kris, you have to know this isn't a good strategy," Lane began. It was not a good idea to forbid Adam anything. He was so damn contrary, he'd do what you told him not to do times ten._

_"I know that I don't want my boyfriend gyrating out in public with his cock with a neon sign on it!" Kris insisted. He knew he was being stubborn, but he also knew he was right. He crossed his arms over his chest as the moon swung down and Adam stepped onto the stage. It wasn't bad enough that he was gonna have a heart attack every night worrying about Adam in that contraption, but he was going to watch him do it in the cock corset pants? They were way too hot to be worn out in public. Adam -- and his cock -- belonged to him, not the freaking world._

_"You are not going there..." Adam said softly, reining in his temper with effort. "We've talked about this before. Part of what we're selling up there is an illusion, a fantasy. We use everything on stage -- our voices, our hair, our make up, our costumes and our bodies -- to fulfill fantasies, ideas that people didn't even know they had."_

_Kris snapped, "Yeah, whatever. I don't like people being pointed in the direction of having fantasies about your cock!"_

_"Well...." Tommy drawled slowly. "As long as their not being pointed in the direction of the dressing room after Adam's had his make up applied for the night and you get your uh...fill of it, why are you complaining? OW!" He shrieked then cracked up when Kris threw a guitar pick at his head. "Hey, once again and in advance -- thanks for having sex with Adam!"_

_"Speaking of which, hedgehog, I'll make it worth your while --" Adam tried to be conciliatory because he did understand being proprietary. And jealous. He did, really, even if part of him was still pissed that Kris was trying to tell him what to wear even though he never listened to Adam's gripes about plaid, but everyone laughed, which incensed Kris even more._

 

**Rolling Stone: Laughing heartily at what is clearly an inside joke about pants that do appear to have the criss-crossed ribbons of a corset over the crotch area, Lambert laughs again as his make-up artist vainly tries to force the performer into his chair for what he calls, "glitter re-application." He finally succeeds in luring him back to the dressing room by promising that Lambert's partner, Kris Allen, is there and waiting for him just as the tour's lead guitarist and drummer approach in a much more laconic fashion to get their own costumes. The two men crack even more inside jokes from years of joint touring and resist my efforts to spill any Lambert beans, only willing to say -- with joint smirks -- that Allen appears to like glitter as much as Lambert.**

 

\---- _fourth dress rehearsal before tour cont'd._

_"What the actual fuck?" Kris snapped, feeling his face turn as red as the red velvet cake his auntie used to make for special occasions. Hmm, he really should make one of those cakes soon. And it was one thing to know, but did you have to talk about it? Secrets or at least pretending something was a secret could be a good thing. A very good thing. At least from his mother, which was the point. The guys couldn't talk about this stuff now that his mother was in the picture. So yeah, secrets could be good. But not secret recipes -- maybe his mom could get her sister to give him that recipe, like promise he'd turn straight if he could eat that cake. Not that he would. Adam's cock was way better than some cake. Even red velet. Even red velvet with cream cheese frosting. Frosting... on Adam's cock. Perfect._

_"Are you thinking about chicken, about cake or about Adam's cock?" Tommy retorts, stepping back because -- hey, he wasn't an idiot. Although he was, because he shouldn't tease Kris -- it was the fourth and supposedly final dress and he'd like to get it done._

_"Listen, Allen..." Isaac beats a rhythm on his drum until Kris turns his head. "We've joked about this before. What's the big deal? We all know you had a ... thing about visiting Adam in his dressing room after Sutan finished his glitter application."_

_Deciding she might as well get into the fun, Cam added, "And that the door was locked."_

_Lane called out, "And that the glambulge was seldom seen on tour last time!"_

_As everyone burst out laughing, Kris looked at Adam. "Must everyone talk about this!"_

_Holding his hands up and shrugging, Adam controlled his own amusement at the indignation on Kris' face. "So, like I was saying, hedgehog, give in on the cock corset pants and I'll make it worth your while... And get over the rest of it." Honestly, what did the boy think -- that no one would notice the number of times he'd had to run to get to the stage on time because he'd had to take a moment to make sure his knees could support him after one of Kris' dressing room visits?_

_Kris stared, then felt a giggle gurgling up from within. He was being an idiot. "So... describe to me how you'd make it worth my while to allow you to wear those cock corset pants on tour. Or maybe I could come up with an idea. I know! Laces."_

_"Lace?" Cale asked in confusion. "Does Adam hate lace or something."_

_"No. Lac_ es _. Plural. As in, you know, like ribbons..." Kris nodded. "You like the idea of a corset on your cock so much--"_

_"It's not on my cock!" Adam hurried to explain. He was not a fan of boundaries. "It's on the pants flap, sooooo...."_

_"I am NOT buying a cock restraint on Amazon for you two!" Lane called out. "There are limits."_

_"Oh, I agree with you, Laney. There are limits..." Kris gave Adam a long look, up and down, then settled on staring at Adam's crotch-- was the glambulge making an appearance? Aha. "And I'm gonna set them. He wears those cock corset pants and I'm gonna put all sorts of limits on him. All sorts. Starting with laces, I can wind around and over, just taking my time with them..."  
_

 

**Rolling Stone: It's perhaps no surprise that Lambert is running late. The concert tonight in Nashville is fraught with enough history to slow down even the most stalwart of of performers. Not only is Lambert playing at the Ryman Theater -- once the home of the Grand Ol' Opry, a place a contemptuous Randy Travis insisted then-Idol contestant Lambert would never play -- but Nashville is also the closest tour stop to his partner Kris Allen's home town in Arkansas.**

**Allen is traveling with Lambert as his bassist on this year's tour and -- when you can find him -- he's quick to point out that he's a legitimate musician who works diligently at his craft. He generally keeps a profile so low as to be invisible, but it's no secret to those in the know that Allen was thrown out of his parents' home and declared 'dead' by them when he came out about his sexual orientation several years ago.**

**Less well known is the fact that he and his mother, Kim Allen, reconciled a few months ago and she is attending tonight's performance. Less well known to the general public that is, but a quick saunter down the entrance line informs me that Glamberts know everything. The waiting Glamberts are wondering if Lambert will tone down what one fan calls his "sexy sexy sexy" show in deference to the venue's location in the conservative south or to his _de facto_ mother-in-law's perhaps more conservative sensibilities.**

 

_  
Tour: Miami "I'm gonna melt," Tommy complained, shoving his hair back and then reaching for a bottle of cold water from the cooler nestled into the sand. "Why are we in Miami in August? Who thought of that plan? Shouldn't we be in Scotland -- it's always cold there."_

_"In Nashville--" Cale began, then shrugged. After two months of being on the road and more than half-way through the tour, he knew sometimes a guy just needed to whine._

_"It's not gonna be much cooler in Nashville! The humidity!" Tommy whined. "It's gonna be hot hot hot!"_

_"Speaking of..." Kris began. He paused, rubbed the back of his neck, then in a rush asked, "Adam, when we go to Nashville, can you tone down the sex stuff on stage?"_

_Looking away from the cool blue of the ocean and slowly turning his head to look at Kris, Adam stared. He must have been out in the sun too long because he surely had misheard what Kris had said. Yeah, that had to be it. The heat undulating off of the concrete walkway behind Kris' head proved it -- he was just hot and not hearing properly. But still, it was only polite to ask. "I beg your pardon. What did you say?"_

_"I said -- can you tone done the sex stuff on stage in Nashville?" Kris let out the last of the breath he'd sucked in to ask the question he'd avoided asking for the two months they'd been on tour. Of course, he'd blurt it out in public. Of course. Idiot, he told himself as he saw the look of shock, then anger that flew across the portion of Adam's face not hidden by hat or sunglasses. He carefully put his hands on his thighs, hoping that no one noticed him rubbing his sweaty palms on his swim shorts._

_"Excuuuuse me?" Adam snapped, stopping in mid-tug of the world's ugliest hat. It had been hot already and now he was fairly certain he was going to have a heat stroke. The waves of heat from the sidewalk now seemed to be rising off of his own body._

_Squaring his shoulders, because it wasn't like he was asking for the moon or something, so he wasn't being ridiculous and there was no reason for Adam's fair skin to have flushed red, really really red, Kris repeated, "The Nashville show - my mom's gonna be there. Can you just... you know...not be all sexy? Be, well, safe?"_

_"Uh-oh..." Lane murmured, slanting a worried eye towards the paparazzi who had managed to find them on this private beach. They were standing far enough away and on public land so that they couldn't call the cops, but still. Bloody hell, no good ever came from Miami. Last time they were here, Kris had been so hot for Adam that he'd nearly ripped Adam's pants off him in the barricade meet and greets. It must have something to do with the heat -- it made everyone barmy._

_Tommy blinked, shoved his hair out of eyes, then blinked again. He turned to Isaac and asked, "_ What _did he just say?"_

_"He couldn't have said what I thought he just said, because that would be dumb dumb dumb." Isaac gaped in disbelief. Had Kris lost his fucking mind? He turned to Cale and whispered, "Did your friend fall out of a tree when he was a kid and hit his head or something?"_

_Staring into Kris' worried brown eyes, Adam took a deep breath. "Just for the sake of clarity -- because I think it's critical that we achieve clarity here," he said in a soft tone as he kept one eye on the paps and the other on his temper. "You want my show to be devoid of sexiness? To be safe? For your mother's sake?" He asked, rubbing his hands over his sunscreen-slick arms to keep from grabbing Kris and throwing him down and discussing this stupid idea the way it needed to be discussed. By fucking. Because Kris' idea was so fucking offensive, it was, it was... ohmigod, it was the kind of crap a closeted man would say. Is that what was going to happen now that his mother was in the picture? How long until..._

_"Yeah. That's it. I mean, just the one show. Make it... cleaner since my family -- my mom -- is gonna be there."_

_Snatching a cold bottle of something from the cooler, Adam chugged it down, hoping in vain that the frosty whatever it was would cool him off. "I have responsibilities greater than making your mother comfortable. Like say, oh I don't know -- pleasing the fans who bought tickets and traveled to the show?! Or artistic integrity? Or my own personal honor? Small little unimportant details like that!"_

_"But my mother--" Kris pressed._

_Cale stared in shock at his old friend and then looked around at his newer friends. Even though he hadn't known Adam as long as anyone sitting here, he knew as well as they all did that making a request like that was asking to have fireworks set off in your ass. Then again... Knowing Kris and living in the same bus with Adam and Kris for the last eight weeks, he had an idea that Kris might want those fireworks. Boy did like to have Adam be all... what was the word? Toppy. Or maybe he really did just think he had to protect his mother. Or both._

__Crunch

_Squeezing the empty plastic bottle in one hand and tossing it down, Adam forced his voice to stay low. "Your mother is one person. One. The good of the many outweighs the good of the few."_

_"Did you just fucking quote Spock from Star Trek?" Kris firmed his lips and sat up straight. "This isn't science fiction or LA. Its' real life. Like I said, my mother is going to that show and I don't want to push her too hard. Or have people see it and give her grief for being there at a show like that. I just don't think it's a good idea for her to see you being..._ Couldn't _you be, well... You know."_

_"You know?" Adam pressed. He wasn't going to go off half-cocked. He wasn't going to assume Kris had lost his damn mind. He wanted to know it. "You know? Me being what? Say it."_

_"Don't say it, don't say it..." Tommy begged in a soft whisper. "Don't..."_

_"Family-friendly. Okay, I said it. Just this once. Be... Nicer on stage. Not as sexy, you know?" Kris asked, ignoring the low moan of distress from both Tommy and Lane. "I'm not asking for much, just--" Kris broke off when Adam interrupted his, his voice low and tight and sharp as glass._

_"For me to become some tame gay who_ nicely _keeps his sexuality under wraps? Because it's not_ nice _to have gay sex. It's not_ nice _to be sexy and be gay. Or to have any evidence that gay people actually have sex, because gays can only be_ nice _if they're asexual? So I have to be keep my sexuality safely hidden in my own country so as not to offend small-town head up their ass bigots?!" Adam spat._

_"My mother is not a head up her ass bigot!"_

_"She used to be."_

_"What did you say?" Kris gasped, knowing, just knowing, Adam was about to tell him one of those home truths you'd rather run away from home than hear._

_"You heard me. Your mother used to be one of those people. The kind who'd throw their own kid out for being gay. So I'm wondering if that kid is trying to pretend he's not gay -- in public at least -- so he can preserve his relationship with his mother."_

_"Holy fucking shit!" Kris stared at Adam in disbelief. Did he really believe that? Or fear that? And was...was he right, even a teeny tiny little bit? No, couldn't be. "Who do you think you are?"_

_Tommy whimpered. "I don't like it when Mom and Dad have a real fight."_

_"What should we do?" Cale whispered to Lane. He had heard that Adam and Kris had the occasional fight, but it was like a Nazarene Democrat -- he'd never seen one._

_"Leave. Okay, everyone, Adam and Kris obviously need to have a discussion in private, so let's leave," Lane ordered crisply. "The paps--"_

_"Oh, no, you don't need to leave. The paps will ignore you all once we're gone. And we're going," Adam snapped. He curled his hand around Kris' bicep and pulled him off of his beach chair and towards the walkway to the hotel, their flip-flops snapping loudly on the cement._

_"I don't need to be dragged," Kris began as Adam slid his hand down to Kris' wrist and kept tugging. Although it was kinda hot. So maybe he shouldn't complain. Or maybe he should, because then Adam -- being the Contrary Mary that he was -- would keep on doing it._

_"You need to be spanked," Adam retorted as they neared the back entrance to the hotel._

_"I... what?" Kris gaped up at Adam as Adam shocked him by pulling him up against him. "The paps!" He gasped out as he felt a hard ridge against his belly that was not Adam's belt buckle. Especially since Adam wasn't wearing a belt. He was wearing loose swim shorts that were probably getting tighter by the second given the way... He unconsciously pressed his hips back at Adam's, stifling a groan as the heat pouring off of Adam rolled over him like a hot flash._

_"Oh, so you don't want pictures of us this close?" Adam challenged, his fury mixed with fear that Kris was regressing back into the boy who'd kept secrets about himself._

_"That's not what I meant!" Protesting in a loud whisper, Kris bit back a groan as Adam pushed into him and his own legs spread automatically. "You know I don't like public --"_

_"And now I'm starting to wonder why!" Adam pressed into Kris and nodded in gratification when Kris' pupils dilated and his breath rasped loudly._

_"What the hell does that mean?" Kris asked, staring at the pulse pounding against the skin of Adam's throat. Maybe he should lick Adam right there._

_"It means, I'm starting to wonder if it's all about hiding your sexuality because deep down you're ashamed of it."_

_"I...No!" Kris protested. Adam couldn't think that -- but the look in Adam's eyes said he did. But he was so not ashamed of it. In fact with that sexy pout on Adam's look and the heat in his eyes, to say nothing of the hardness against his belly, he'd have no problem telling the paps just what he wanted to do to Adam right now because angry Adam was hot Adam and his lips were... Oh yeah, Kris read the intent in Adam's eyes just before his lashes swept down and his mouth swept in and oh yeah..._

_Adam growled deep in his throat as Kris' mouth opened immediately and he practically sucked Adam's tongue inside. His arms wound around Adam's neck nad pulled him down. Good. At least he could still reach Kris this way and --_

_"Boys! Inside! Right. Now!" Lane snapped, her voice tight as she hurried to step in between the photographers and the two men who looked like they were about to have make up sex on the hotel's doorstep. Before they'd even finished their fight. First things first, bloody hell. Geoffrey would have her head if she didn't handle this fight properly, although really, it was Kris' fault and she'd tell Geoffrey that. Plus she'd never expected they'd still be fighting -- she'd thought they'd snap at each other and be laughing before they got to the door. Speaking of which, "Get inside now."_

_"Get inside? Yeah. That's my plan." Adam smiled sharply. "That is, if Kris will admit to wanting that or maybe he'd rather we play the nice safe family-friendly gay clowns who sit around and trade_ hilarious _quips about party planning and pink napkins and Broadway show tunes to prove that we're nice, safe, asexual, funny gay boys. Should we wear bow ties too?"_

_"You bitch!" Kris gasped, unsure whether to laugh or yell or slap Adam silly. Or well, there was another option. Show Adam that he wasn't afraid of being sexual._

_"C'mon, let's go hide our sexuality." Adam circled Kris' wrist as they started down the hall to the elevator, Lane's sigh echoing behind them._

_"I'm not asking you to hide your sexuality--" Kris started again as the elevator doors closed behind them._

_"Really? Then why when your mother was here were you not comfortable with me putting my arm around you?" Adam retorted. Keeping his eyes on the floor display overhead to keep from staking his claim on Kris where there were security cameras, he asked, "Are you going back to hiding who you are when you're back there? Or near your mother? Or hiding me? Like you're ashamed of who you are and of me?"_

_"I..." Kris gulped, then growled. "How can you think that? How?"_

_"Because!"_

_**Ding!** _

_The doors opened. Adam grabbed Kris' wrist and pulled him down the hall. "You only got physically close to me when your mother wasn't around. And now you're asking me to tone it down, play it safe -- safely not sexy and therefore safely not gay -- when your mother and whoever is in the audience. So pardon me for wondering if you're going to slip back into old habits, safe habits--"_

_"I will not!" Kris snapped automatically as Adam fished his key card out of his zipped pocket, shoved it in the door and -- Oh yeah, Adam could shove something in him that way, hard and fast._

_"Really? Think about it. Think about it!" Tugging Kris into the room, Adam slammed the door and flipped the lock closed with a loud metallic snap._

_**BANG!** _

_Kris jumped at the sound, staring at the door, then then licked his lips when he realized Adam had already tossed his hat and sunglasses aside, stepped out of his flip flops and was pulling off his tank tee-shirt. Oh, he was probably supposed to be fighting back... even if the way Adam was hustling him back towards the bed was making him forget what they were fighting about. He stumbled out of his own flip flops and nearly groaned when Adam steadied him against his own body. "You're generalizing when all I'm talking about is is is pants! And not humping the stage!"_

_"You like when I hump the stage!" Adam pointed out as he shoved Kris back on the bed and reached out to pull Kris' swim shorts down in a fast move. He barely had time to pull his own shorts down as Kris reached out with arms and legs and pulled him down on top of him. Unable to resist the pout on Kris' lips, Adam's mouth covered Kris', determined to stake a claim. Pulling back, gasping, he added, "In fact, the last time we were in Miami and I humped the stage, you were all over me like sand on a beach!"_

_"That's way different now..." Blinking in confusion as Adam's cock brushed against his, Kris struggled to plant his heels on the slippery bedspread and thrust up against Adam. Closer, he needed to get closer and judging by the intense heat blazing out of Adam's eyes and the tight grip of Adam's hands on his ass, so did Adam. "I mean--"_

_"Why? Because then someone might think about me humping you?" Adam challenged as he did just that, pushing and shoving hard and fast against Kris' balls and ass, over and over, hearing gasping breaths, unsure if they were his or Kris' or both. "Are you seriously that afraid of being gay that--"_

_"Oh my fucking God!" Kris exclaimed, unsure if he was protesting Adam's words or the fact that Adam wasn't inside him_ now _._

_"You just took the lord's name in vain. Isn't that against the rules for good mama's boys, just like what we're doing now--" Adam pulled back and stood up, watching Kris' need change to aggravation. Well, good._

_"I'll show you!" Kris yelled and shoved Adam's chest hard enough to make him fall back onto the bed. "I'll show you..." He grunted as he straddled Adam's chest and moved forward. "Suck me," he demanded, holding his cock in his hand and aiming it at Adam's mouth. Damn, those lips... He groaned as Adam opened those lips and sucked him inside and then stared up at him as those lips and tongue immediately circled and licked and pulled him deeper and deeper, until he was gasping and moaning, babbling incoherently, his fingers tangling into Adam's hair, pulling him tighter until --_

__Slurp  
Plop __

_With a wet plop, Adam pulled his mouth off of Kris' cock and grinned at Kris' shocked expression. "But the problem is, me sucking you doesn't prove you're gay. Plenty of guys will take a blow job from anyone. It's not like there's such a thing as a bad blow job, after all." Adam smirked. "I'm not convinced you're gay enough -- Oooh!" Adam heard his own voice shriek as Kris glared at him then suddenly slid back, their damp skin sliding until he was between Adam's legs, bent his head and sucked Adam's cock right into the wet heat of his mouth._

_"Well?" Kris pulled back enough to ask. "Is this gay enough?"_

_"Well." Adam levered up on his elbows to watch. "That's a good start. But I need more evidence. So, get to it. Convince me. Show and tell, boy."_

_Curling his fingers into Adam's thighs, Kris felt his hands slicken with heat as a drop of sweat slid down his spine. He took a deep breath and nearly groaned as he inhaled the male scent of sex and seat. Now he needed to taste. He bent his head and swirled his tongue around the broad velvet head of Adam's cock, his own cock throbbing and his head spinning, hoping Adam felt the same._

_"I said, show and_ tell _. Tell me." Adam flicked his finger at the underside of Kris' lower lip. That lip that was built to have a cock thrusting on it. "Replace the words you said outside. Make me forget them."_

_Oh hell and oh yessss, Adam was in a dominating mood. God, he loved that. Good thing he was kneeling, Kris knew, since his knees might have wobbled when Adam flicked his lip like that. Yeah, his knees were weak but his cock was hard as a rock. And so was Adam's. Yum. What was he waiting for? He had that fucking huge hard cock practically in his face. "I love sucking cock." Kris gave a long, loud slurp of a lick up and then down Adam's cock. "Love. It. I think about sucking your cock all the time."_

_"Like when?" Adam pressed. Kris didn't often talk dirty, so he was going to push him this time. He needed to know that Kris needed him too._

_"Like... before. At the beach. Watching the water..." Kris slowly lapped the tip of Adam's cock, sliding his tongue back and forth slowly. "I was imagining we were on some private beach, all to ourselves and you were swimming while I was sitting on the sand, playing my guitar. Then you came out of the water and you were naked and you just stood in front of me. I shoved my guitar away..." He stroked his hands slowly up and down Adam's thighs and followed his fingers with his mouth, reminding himself to keep talking. "And then I knelt up and just started sucking you right there, while the waves lapped around us just like my tongue was lapping your cock, sucking that salty pre-cum into my mouth. Like this..." Kris kept his eyes on Adam's as his mouth demonstrated the 'show' portion of his penance._

_"And I'd fuck that hot mouth of yours until those lips were pink and puffy," Adam responded, gently rubbing his fingertips along those lips even as they stroked up and down his cock. He bit his lip when Kris licked his thumb, then lifted his mouth up to trail a string of sloppy wet kisses down his cock and over his balls. "Keep going," he ordered, opening his legs farther._

_"This... is this gay enough for you?" Kris asked, pushing Adam's legs up as he his head went down and he licked lower and lower, loving how Adam, for once, wiggled against him, shoving his body against Kris' mouth, making little noises. He shuddered himself as a flash of heat scorched across his body, making him damp everywhere. He needed Adam. Now. Had to taste. More. Sliding his tongue back up over Adam's tight balls, Kris opened his mouth and once again, although faster this time, sucked Adam's cock in, determined to taste him on his tongue, to take him in and --_

_"Not enough." Adam grabbed Kris'arms and hauled him up on top of his body. When Kris immediately straddled his hips and began rubbing his balls against Adam's wet cock, Adam gasped, then growled. "Not enough." He rolled Kris under him, then flipped him over. "Hands and knees." Curling his arms around Kris' waist, Adam hauled him into position, then when Kris wiggled his ass back, trying to push against Adam's cock, Adam gently slapped it. "Try harder. Show me what a good gay bottom you are for me. Show me how much you want it."_

_Looking over his shoulder as he wiggled his ass and pushed back, vainly trying to entice Adam's cock closer and harder, Kris grunted in frustration. He tried to move but was pinned into place by the strength of Adam's grip on his hips. The restraint was pushing him to work harder, to push and wiggle and oh hell, now he felt the wetness from Adam's cock on his hole and... "Adammm...please... god, please..."_

_Feeling his head swim as the heated need in Kris' voice went straight to his balls, Adam bent his head and licked a long slow path from the base of Kris' spine up his back, then paused. Counting Kris' breaths, hearing the heavy rasp vibrate through Kris' chest and back and into his own heart, Adam bit down on the back of Kris' neck, groaning when Kris let out a small shriek. "Who do you belong to?"_

_"You. Adam, I need... please..." Kris pushed his buttocks back against Adam, trying to impale himself on Adam's cock, making a groan of protest when Adam shifted his hips and his cock slid up the crack of Kris' ass, teasing rather than fulfilling him._

_Watching Kris wiggle impatiently as he tried to angle his ass so that he could be filled with cock, Adam laughed, his voice low and tight. "I like it when you beg like that. Do it some more. I need to know what you want."_

_"Oh my god...Fuck me." Kris heard the needy dark growl in his own voice and flushed. Only with Adam could he be like this, open and needy and soft and hard at the same time. He looked to the side and saw the tube of lube on the nightstand and reached for it, held up by Adam's hands, now sliding down to tease his thighs. Flipping open the cap, he squirted the cool gel onto his fingertips and tossed the tube, before spreading his legs further apart to accommodate his hands as he hurriedly coated his own hole._

_"Tell me what you're doing and why." Adam licked his lips as he watched Kris open himself. God, the boy was so damn hot._

_"I'm opening myself up so you can shove your cock inside me and pound into me until you come or I come or both of us come, but first I just want to feel your hard cock in me." Kris gasped in relief when Adam shoved his hands away and immediately shoved his cock against Kris' hole and then, in one hard shove, pushed in, urgency overtaking them both as they strained to get closer, then closer still, the heat outside nothing compared to the heat between them._

_"Is that what you want?" Adam asked, thrusting out slowly, just to hear Kris' cry of protest, then moan of pleasure as he pushed back in with the surety of long practice at pleasing his lover. "Show me."_

_"Yes, yes..." Kris hissed, shoving back, gasping as Adam pulled out, then pushed back in. He clenched his ass, holding Adam inside, then groaned as Adam swelled even fuller and harder inside him. "Is this gay enough for you -- I love your cock inside me."_

_"That's where it belongs, isn't it? Inside you. Buried deep inside you until you scream, isn't it?" Adam gritted out as he surrendered himself to the urgency pounding through his veins, his pulse throbbing as his heart beat with the need not just to push into Kris over and over, but to claim. "Mine. You're mine."_

_"Promise..." Kris cried out as Adam's right hand slid down from his hip and circled his cock, holding him in a sure grip designed to keep him from coming. "I need... let me...please."_

_"Not yet. Show me more," Adam demanded as he nipped his way from shoulder to shoulder, feeling Kris buck and writhe under him until his head started to spin from the greedy pleasure and heat they were sparking off of each other._

_"Hard...so fucking hard and hot..." Kris cried out, pushing back against Adam, needing to feel more and harder as Adam pounded into him. He gasped in needy anticipation when Adam abruptly released his cock from the restraining circle of his fingers to begin pumping him. "Adammmm....!" he cried out, feeling the fire that was already lit catch to flame, needing... "Oh god, come inside me, I need to feel..." He begged desperately, pushing back, steeling himself to wait until... then rotating his ass around Adam's cock, feeling him freeze, then suddenly and swiftly push him over the edge._

_Hearing Kris' loud cries and feeling his muscles tighten and clench both around his cock and in his hand, Adam curled his left arm around Kris and pulled him tightly back against his body as they created their own fireworks together. "Mine," he hissed out against the back of Kris' neck, licking the bite he'd given the soft skin. "Mine. Don't forget it."_

_"Won't. Won't..." Kris whispered, then let out a little gasping groan as he felt Adam's damp skin still moving against him. "Yours."_

_"We're going to do that again and again until you get it," Adam warned. He kissed Kris' shoulder. "All day if I have to."_

_"Thank god...." Kris moaned as he collapsed onto the bed, Adam following him down, his weight a glad blanket of heat over him as he lay, still writhing from the aftershocks and the feel of Adam's cock still pulsing inside him._

__

 

"Do you want me to keep on going?" Kris asked, pausing in his recitation of the Rolling Stone article. Dani looked awfully flushed and uncomfortable, even if she was floating in a pool. Maybe he should just hurry to get to the end.

 

**Much to the relief of the thousands of fans in attendance and the tens of thousands more who obsessively pore over every video of very song of every concert, Lambert's Nashville show makes no compromises to southern conservatism or parental prudishness. In fact, with Mrs. Allen in attendance, Lambert shocked everyone when he chose to sing Fever as one of his two encore performances. Fever first gained fan notoriety during his GlamNation Tour when he would regularly snog his then-bassist, Tommy Joe Ratliff. The song disappeared entirely for the last tour and had been unheard so far during the Curves in the Cosmos tour, leading fans to believe the song had been permanently retired now that Lambert had a permanent partner.**

**Within the first two chords, much of the female component of crowd recognized the song and went wild, once again proving that heterosexual males do not have a monopoly on enjoying same sex hijinks. All around me, I heard screaming speculation about who, if anyone, Lambert might kiss. The -- yes, I intend to make a bad pun -- fever pitch of excitement only swelled higher when Lambert locked lips with an obviously shocked but equally obviously willing, Kris Allen.**

****

 

 

__

_Tour: Nashville "So...uh... Mom...what did you-- Ugh!" Kris grunted as his mother threw her arms around him and squeezed. Tight. Really tight. "Maaaauhmmmm...." He groaned, laughing. "I. Can't. Breathe."_

_"Oh, sorry, sorry. I 'm just so..." Kim let go and then used her hands to wipe her tears away. "I'm so excited and thrilled and overwhelmed. You were so good up there! And your outfits were nice, even if the pants were a little tight, but I guess the girls like it that way and..." She blushed and paused momentarily, then soldiered on. "And Adam would too -- wait, he picked out the outfits, so yeah. But really, Krissy, I was so proud of you, playing in front of all those people. At the Ryman! Wait 'til I tell Merleeta! Ha! Her son mows lawns for a living. _My_ son played at the _Ryman!_ "_

_"I'm glad you liked it. What did you... uh... think about Adam?" Kris asked, bracing himself._

_"Adam?" Kim blinked, then blushed. "I...uh...wasn't really paying much attention to him."_

_"What?" Lane blurted out, then smoothed out her face and asked, "You weren't paying much attention to Adam? Why not, might I ask?"_

_"Well,_ my son _was on stage. That's all I'm really interested in." Kim shrugged apologetically. "Sorry and no offense to Adam -- and it's not like he needs_ my _attention. I did hear the screaming and all and he does have a nice voice..."_

_"Nice..." Kris choked. "Nice? What have you been smokin', Mama?"_

_"Shush. He has a very nice voice. Very powerful." Kim nodded. "But to be honest, the only time I really noticed him was when he gave you that cute little kiss during that Fever song."_

_"Cute. Little. Kiss?" Kris parroted back.He'd almost had a heart attack when Adam had come at him, then the minute Adam's lips had touched his, he'd forgotten everything else, as usual. Until he'd looked for his mom. She'd had a funny look on her face and he'd worried himself into a frazzle that it was disgust. But it wasn't. Oh hell. No wonder Adam hadn't had much faith in Kim Allen; he hadn't either._

_"Yes. You seemed to like it anyway." Kim smiled as her son seemed to look everywhere but at her. "But I guess he has a history of that with that boy with the pink hair. Some sort of ritual? But now he did it with you, which is probably better. We wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea about who Adam's with, would we?"_

_"I... What...How--" Kris gulped and pulled his shirt away from his damp chest. Damn, he was sweatin' like a... a gay man in the Conway church on Sunday morning. "You're not surprised?"_

_"Lane told me to look up the show on the Youtubes so I would know what sort of show it was." Kim lowered her voice to whisper, "I think she was afraid I was going to faint or something."_

_"Well..." Kris slanted a look at Lane, who smiled smugly, then cleared her face into blandness. 'Thank you,' Kris mouthed before turning back to his mother with a smile._

_"Current appearances to the contrary, I wasn't always a middle-aged mom whose only music is church praise hymns. Back in the day, by which I mean the 1970s---"_

_"Sex, drugs and rock and roll!" Tommy announced._

_"Well, bless your heart, young man." Kim smiled._

_"That's southern for shut up and mind your own business," Cale whispered to Tommy._

_Tommy frowned. "I thought that was southern for fuck you. That's what Kris told me."_

_"Honestly, Kris, your language." Kim sighed and turned back to Kris. "Before I met your father, I went to rock concerts. I saw way worse in the stands than I saw on those Youtubes with Adam. I'd just forgotten, I guess. I'd forgotten a lot of things...like my priorities."_

_"Are. You. Kidding. Me?" Kris whispered, his voice creaking and jerking to a halt like an old car needing a new carburetor._

_"No. Why would I kid you about that?" Kim asked in confusion. Seeing the even greater confusion on her son's face, Kim smiled gently and reached out to pat his cheek. "Krissy. I... Well, the last few months I've had to do a lot of thinking and reflecting. And watched a lot of these Youtubes of the concerts and interviews..."_

_"And?" Kris prompted when his mother slowed down._

_"I think I can be..." Kim grinned and pushed her hands down on an invisible lever. "Down with it."_

_"Down with it?" Kris parroted. What the hell had happened to his mother?_

_"Cool with it?"_

_Kris blinked at his mother, then began to giggle helplessly. "Oh, Mama..."_

_"Don't laugh at me, young man!" Kim ordered, then laughed herself. She put her hand on Kris' arm and squeezed, before leaning forward to admit,"I know I wasn't the best mother. And I didn't understand any of it. But now, I'm gettin' it."_

_"But...how?" Kris asked, hoping his mother hadn't heard the whine in his voice._

_"To be honest and I apologize for invadin' your privacy by accident, when I was out visitin', I saw you and Adam one morning in the pool. Playin' around and then you two kissed and I saw the happiness on your face, the kind of happiness a parent always wants their kid to have and you had it. What more could a mother want? And then too, I realized..." Kim shrugged. "It was just a kiss, ya know? Not the second coming of Satan. Just a kiss. And I knew I'd, we'd all made the devil out of something that was so... normal. A kiss. How could a kiss be evil?"_

_"So...what made you kinda turn a corner was seeing us... close? And kissing?" Kris gulped. Oh hell, if Adam heard that, his ass was grass._

_Tommy slapped Kris on the back. "See, dude. As usual you spend way too much time worrying, trying to prevent bad stuff from happening and that actually causes way more bad stuff than the bad stuff."_

_Kris stared at Tommy, then shook his head. "The fact that I understand that is the weirdest part of tonight. Well, second weirdest."_

_"I think I got it too." Kim pointed her finger at Kris, then wagged it in his face. "Let me guess, young man. You were borrowing trouble and then trying to run away with it, weren't you?"_

_"You know, there's a lyric in there!" Adam announced as he joined them, curling his arm around Kris and giving him a hug, then a kiss on the side of his head. He looked from Kris to Kim and smiled. She seemed cool with everything. Fantastic. "Running with borrowed trouble?"_

_"Yeah, I'll get right on that. Soon as I figure out who borrowed my mother and ran away with her." Kris leaned into Adam as he stared at his mother. "I think I'm livin' in an alternate reality. My mother's cool with a kiss, which is okay, since it was just a kiss, but then again, it was way more than that, it was like earth-bending and mind shaking or is that earth-shaking and mind-bending and why is everyone smiling, because that makes no sense and Adam when did you take your shower and did you use that new soap because you smell good and-- "_

_"You haven't been smoking weed again, have you?" Kim asked dubiously._

__

 

**Rolling Stone: A swirling and sometimes confusing melange of images twisting in circles as though they were hallucinogenic fruits mixing in a Cusinart blender for a heady tropical drink is grounded, mostly, by the rich tones of Lambert's stellar voice. Mostly, that is, except for the moments when his voice soars and fills the space whether it's the venue or the cosmos itself. You leave his shows stumbling and blinking as the cacophony of car horns and truck traffic reminds you that you only left earth, whether down through a rabbit hole or up through a black hole, for a short time.**

****  
__

_End of tour: New York "I likes alls the lights..." Kris slurred, giggling at himself as they walked around Times Square. They'd just left an awesome bar because Adam had gotten a text message inviting him to a club._

_"Yessss. Bright lights, wig city." Adam smiled and pulled Kris closer under his arm as they walked down Broadway towards the source of the blinking lights. Pretty. "Ha. I said wig. Not big."_

_"Big. Like your dick." Kris laughed merrily and flung himself around Adam's side to faceplant in his shoulder and wiggle closer._

_"Oh good lord, dudes. Get a room. Preferably not one close to mine._ Oh Adammmmmm, Adammmmmm... _" Cale shoved Kris and laughed as Kris pouted at him._

_"Hey, shhhtopp it..." Kris kicked at Cale and missed, nearly falling over before Isaac caught him._

_Cale stumbled as he laughed so hard that Isaac had to grab at him in turn. "You stop it. My mother somehow ended up in the room next to yours in Nashville. It wasn't cool. And I had to switch with her -- after a converta... voncon... sasshun... talk. After a_ talk _I wish I never had to have!" Cale grimaced while everyone else laughed. Pointing at Adam, he said, "All because your boy has a big mouth. You need to gag him or something."_

_Tommy elbowed Cale. "Hey, Cale, that's right. Your mom was there with Kris' mom. What did she think about the show?"_

_Cale laughed, even as his face turned red. "She...uh...liked it. But she paid a little more attention to Adammmmm than Miz Allen did, that's fo sure!"_

_"Oh?" Tommy teased, "She noticed he had a nice_ voice _?"_

_"Yeah, sure." Cale rolled his eyes. "And a nice ... uh... Shaddup! Not goin' there!"_

_"No, but yo mama would!" Tommy taunted, already running away before Cale could extricate himself from his own feet._

_"Oooh, that was a low blow!" Cam noted._

_"I'll take a blow any way I can get it!" Adam announced, smiling as Kris held onto him tightly and giggled._

_Lane grabbed for Cam's arm, wondering how she'd once again gotten assigned the job of being the designated adult tonight. She pulled Cam over to look at a mannequin in a store window, noting absently, "We don't need any commentary about mums, especially Kris' mum. We don't want to go through_ that _again."_

_"Oh, I dunno. It ended up being pretty hot," Adam said with a wink, then slapped Kris' butt. "Hey, I never gave you that spanking from months ago."_

_"And you're not gonna!" Kris giggled again, dancing away. "Besides, I was right. Big--"_

_"About what being big? The size of Adam's dick?" Lane asked drily._

_"No. Who would take that bet anyway? Everyone knows it's big." Kris grinned. "Thanksfuffy."_

_"Thanksfuffy?" Lane rolled her eyes as Adam murmured, "So cute!" and pulled Kris in for a kiss. Right there in Times Square. Where there were approximately a million tourists all with camera phones, all apparently taking pictures. She threw up her hands and then slapped them down on Adam's back and shook him. "Move your bloody ass towards the club!"_

_"Yeah. At least there'll have to be fewer cameras there," Cam agreed. She asked Lane, "How did we get assigned the job of being the sheepherders?"_

_"We're not sheep!" Cale called back. "We'd be...cows. No! Bulls! Bulls with balls!"_

_"Ya sure, you betcha!" Kris laughed. "Hey, what's that song... We sang it like in sixth grade?"_

_"Sixth grade... I dunno. I was too inter...eshted -- no offense, Laney, love of my life -- in Jamie Lynn's new boobs to really pay attenshun." Cale grinned. "But you weren't."_

_"Nah. Which is why I am today the superior musician. I was payin' acshual attenshun in music and... It was, oh I know!" Kris cleared his throat and began to sing, "Git along little dooggies! It's yer misfurtune and nun of ma own!"_

_"What in bloody hell was that?" Lane asked, horrified at the cacophony coming out of Kris' mouth._

_"I don't know!" Adam answered. "He's scaring me."_

_"It's a song," Isaac informed him solemnly. "Seriously, it's a song. Country. I think."_

_"Ah, well, that explains it." Lane nodded. Country music made her ears bleed. Songs about red Solo cups?_

_"It's trying to be a song," Adam retorted. "Some sick song about herding dogs? They do that in Arkansas?"_

_"No, no!" Kris waved his arms around, managing to smack Cale in the nose. Cale pushed him away and Kris flailed around, giggling when Adam caught him and then picked him up. Winding his legs around Adam's waist, Kris held on and began singing again. "Git along, little doooggggie! Whoop-ee-ti-yi-o get along little doggies, you know that Wyoming will be your new home."_

_"Here's the club." Lane pulled on Adam's arm._

_"Is it in Wyoming?" Kris blurted out, looking in confusion around the street. Huh. It looked like New York. Which was weird. "Because that's where you were herding us, right? Cowgirls?" He looked over Adam's shoulder at Cam and pointed. "Cam, the cowgirl!"_

_"At least he doesn't have a whip," Cam sighed._

_"I do!" Adam announced brightly. "I have my flogger. Then I have those whips from the Idol tour. I saved them."_

_"I like the purple one! It tickles!" Kris giggled._

_Lane looked at Kris with dubious eyes. "Should we go in? I mean, Kris is somewhat arseholed."_

_"No, he's not. I haven't pulled down his jeans." Adam stared at Lane in befuddlement. "And we are in public. I"m not so drunk I don't know where I am. And I do have some boundaries, you know. So I wouldn't arsehole Kris--"_

_"Oh bloody hell. It means drunk." Lane sighed and pushed around Adam to the doorway, where she smiled at the bouncer and showed her card. Holding her breath as the over-sized man stared at Kris wrapped around Adam's body, singing some idiot song about dogs and cows and Wyoming, Lane waited._

_"They can come in. If the little guy can walk on his own," the bouncer said in a deep voice._

_"I can walk! I could even herd cattle!" Kris announced as he slid down Adam's body, looping his arms around Adam's neck. "I'd like to use your cattle prod, cowboy."_

_"At least my mom isn't here to hear that!" Cale looked around the club. Lots of lights. The sparkling ones were really good._

_"Yeah, moms!" Kris tugged on Adam's arm. "I was right about moms."_

_"Sure." Adam patted Kris on the head as Lane pulled them toward the VIP balcony. "So about moms. You probably shouldn't talk about that purple whip in public, baby."_

_"Why not?" Kris pouted as Adam sat down, then changed his expression to glee as he plopped down on topo of Adam and wiggled. "I like thaz purple whip. Tickles! Who doesn't like to laugh?"_

_Peering over the balcony, Tommy turned and winked at Cam, just as Lane came up followed by a cocktail waitress bearing a tray. "I feel like we're in that Mary Poppins scene where they're all high as a kite and drinking tea on the ceiling."_

_"I love to laugh!" Adam sang out. "Long and loud and clear--"_

_"Clearly, I like long." Kris wiggled around some more on Adam's lap. "If I keep wiggling, I'll get what I like! Long!"_

_The waitress froze and then began to laugh. Lane handed her a bill and whispered, "Please accept this bribe to keep from talking about this to the Post or Perez. Please."_

_"You shouldn't talk about ta whips in pubic!" Cale called out, then giggled. "Pubic. I said. Pubic. In bublic!"_

_"Oh dear lord, save me." Lane shook her head and hid her own smile._

_"You shouldn't, Krissy." Adam nuzzled into Kris' neck. "Yummy. You smell good. I had to convince your mom you weren't a pervert, 'member?"_

_"I'm not! I jesssss like dick!" Kris blurted out. "Yours. Not theirs---" He pointed at the other men in the group. "And Laney and Cam the Cowgirl don't have dicks, so I don't want them either. Just youuuuuuu..." Kris kissed Adam's cheek. "Wuv you."_

_"We know!" Tommy and Isaac said in unison, then fell on each other, laughing._

_Lane laughed too. Adam's idea to have one last weekend in New York after the tour finished had been a good one. They all needed to blow off steam. She was planning on doing it tomorrow at Sak's._

_"My mother wuvs you too!" Kris remembered he was supposed to be making some point about moms. "I forgot to tell you. She told me you're a keeper. And that was after you apparently talked with her about how I'm not a freak in bed. Which....Oh." He held up his hand. "I have fingers! Okay, my point is I was right about moms. Moms don't want to know about sex. Like Cale's mom didn't want to hear me screaming out your name because thasss just creepy."_

_"I like when you scream my name." Adam leered down at Kris, because Kris was wiggling around in his lap. Which meant Kris wanted sex or some reasonable facs.. facs... "Fax."_

_"No, the guy down there is playing a sax," Tommy interjected. "An alto sax."_

_"It's not a guy!" Cam pointed out impatiently. "It's a girl. Honestly."_

_"A girl?" Tommy perked up. "A girl?"_

_"Yes. A girl with actual breasts." Cam rolled her eyes. "You know breasts --"_

_"I don't think he does," Isaac giggled. "He's been striking out lately."_

_"Why didn't I notice the breasts?" Tommy whined. "I think the gay is rubbing off on me."_

_"You can't rub one out here. Seriously, dude." Cale shook his head._

_"Ya nees to be careful with girls!" Kris pointed out helpfully. "They'ze can get pregnant, like Dani. And then they gets to be moms, who don't want to know about sax any more."_

_"Dani's not a fan of the sax at any time, anyway. Being a mom isn't gonna change dat!" Adam shook his head. "You are confused."_

_"No, not sax._ Sex. _" Kris talked slowly because Adam was kinda tipsy._

_"You said sax," Adam pointed out. "I'm right. Aren't I right?"_

_Cale nodded. "You be right, dude."_

_"Well, I meant sex. Pay attention to what I mean, not what I say." Kris nodded, then blinked. "Hey, lyric... Where's my phone? I'll text you that lyric. Because..." He giggled as he dug in his pocket for his phone, "I don't think we'll remember 'morrow."_

_"So what did you mean?" Adam asked, running his hands under Kris' shirt, ignoring the warning look Lane was sending him. "Hey, you're not my mom! Then again, she probably wouldn't look at me like that."_

_"Oh yes, she--" Lane began._

_"Oh, thasss it!" Kris exclaimed. "Thass it! My point. Ya'll's mom is like totally cool, your dad too. Although his mashed potatoes aren't as good as your mom's, now that I'm not throwing them at your stupid brother any more."_

_"Neil is stupid," Tommy agreed. "He lets Adam annoy him."_

_"I'm good at it." Adam smiled and nodded. "That and singing."_

_"And fucking!" Kris said happily. "And sucking. But my point... is that. Your mom has watched you be like the biggest gay sex guy on stage including giving really good head to a microphone, but most parents don't want to know anything about their kids' sex lives. Any. Thing. Not. A. Thing."_

_"Get serious!" Adam gasped loudly._

_"Serious, dude." Cale nodded. "One of my friend's dads actually got upset when his married daughter got pregnant, because he now had to face that she'd had sex! So then he decided to pretend it was immaculate conception! Like a virgin..." He wrinkled his nose and began singing, "Like a virurgen...touched for the very first timmmmmme!"_

_"Conway is one fucked up place!" Tommy stared at Cale in horror. "I feel bad for Laney."_

_"What?" Lane asked, tuning back into the conversation she'd been trying to ignore._

_"You and Cale, your sex life must--Mmphlfg!" Tommy gurgled as Lane slapped her hand across his mouth._

_"Do you want your hair to be pink and pretty or do you want to wake up bald tomorrow?" Lane hissed._

_"No bald..." Tommy mumbled under her hand. "Pwease?"_

_"Then shut up. Or I get out the razor." Lane glared. She stood up and stomped off to the bathroom._

_"See!" Kris pointed at Lane's receding back. "Not everyone likes to talk about their sex wifes."_

_"I don't talk about my sex wife either." Adam shook his head. "I don't have a wife."_

_"And you're wrong, Timmy." Cale patted Tommy on the head. "That guy in Conway was a little overboard, but I bet that most parents probably like to pretend their kids are still virgins on some level. Lord knows that's what I'm going to pretend about my kids! Don't. Need. To. Know."_

_"Me too!" Kris agreed. "Not a need to know kinda thing, you get whaz I'm sayin'?"_

_"I get it." Cale nodded._

_"Oh puh-leeze!" Adam rolled his eyes and then decided that wasn't his best option because the lights in the club got a little more swirly than was strictly fun. Forcing his head back up, he decided not to shake it. Words. Words were his friend. "Nope. Not gonna believe that everyone pretends their kids don't have sex."_

_"Oh for the love of chicken and waffles!" Kris threw up his hands, then scrabbled around for Adam's phone. "I'm gonna do a poll."_

_Adam giggled as Kris' fingers danced over a sensitive spot. "Wow, little doggie, we're in public. Don't make Laney mad."_

_"I'm not." Kris held Adam's phone up triumphantly. "Doin' a poll."_

_"Pole dance?" Adam whispered urgently. "Bad idea. We're in public. I'd like it in private. But public? Nope. You'll be sad in the morning. I don't like sad Kris. Like happy Kris. Or screaming Kris. Or soapy and wet. Soapy and wet's good."_

_"Later. Pri....Pri... Rities." Kris nodded. "Focus, Lambert. Poll. As in... survey."_

_"Where? How?"_

_"On Twitter."_

_Adam grabbed for the phone. "Hey, that's my phone!"_

_"Well, d'uh. Of course. I'm gonna post it on your account - you've got a katrillion followers, so we'll get good results."_

_"That's true." Adam smiled and then tapped Kris on the nose. "You have good ideas sometimes."_

_"Sometimes?" Kris scoffed. "All the time."_

_"True. Like when you had the idea to ask me out."_

_"Yeah. Geoffrey-- " Kris began as he peered at Adam's phone, then giggled. "There. I did it. Poll on Adam's Twitter."_

_"Goodie. I'll give you a kiss for a reward. 'Cause I'm gonna be right." Gently planting a string of kisses down Kris' neck, Adam paused. Right? About what?_

_"No, you're not," Kris argued automatically. "Uh-oh, Laney's back."_

_"No fighting!" Lane slapped her hand on the table in front of them. "Got it? You can't have one of your stupid fights, the point of which is to have make up sex and have make up sex here. Got it? Privacy. It's a good thing."_

_"Okay, Laney," Adam and Kris said in unison, nodding their heads._

_"We'll be bood goys." Kris giggled._

_"I can't be goy. I'm Jewish." Adam giggled back._

_"Give me your phones." Lane held out her hand. "I don't trust either of you."_

_Kris giggled. "Too latey, Laney!"_

_"What did you do?" Lane groaned as she looked down at the two phones._

_"We're not fighting!" Adam told her. "That's what you wanted. Right? Not like Miami."_

_"Why were we fighting there?" Kris asked, wiggling back deeper into Adam's embrace, turning his head to lick at the base of Adam's neck. "Mmm. Tasty. You were testy. Why? Why so worried I'd be ashamed? I like dick, your dick. Not shamed of it. Not goin' back to Conway, that's fo shure. Your dick isn't there. So no back to Conway."_

_"I was afraid maybe you would," Adam blurted out. "Leave me, go back home with your mom, 'cause it'd be easier..." He trailed off as Lane's gaze narrowed on him, before she smiled and bent her head to her phone._

_"Idjut." Kris grinned, then focused his attention on Adam's lips when he smiled. It was good when Adam smiled. Good lips. That freckle.... He wiggled and then when Adam smiled more, Kris couldn't resist and decided to lick the freckle. Next thing he knew, Laney was hustling them into a car of some kind and then they were in bed and he was licking lots of freckles. Lots and lots. "I like freckles. So hot..." Kris whispered before falling asleep._

_"Ugh." Adam held his head and stared at the carpet. That pattern was really sickening. It should stop swirling. "I don't like this carpet. It's--"_

_"Evil. The work of a teetotaling devil. Tell me about it." Kris groaned. "Lane, why did you let us drink so much?"_

_"Me?" Lane shrieked, grinning when both Adam and Kris moaned and glared at her. She gleefully clanked her spoon against the side of the tea cup as she looked around the sitting area of Adam's suite. "You know, you really might have picked up the underwear before letting me in."_

_"What underwear? I wasn't wearing any?" Adam muttered._

_"I was. I'm a good boy who wears underwear. Clean underwear, in case I end up in an accident, just like my mom taught me." Kris nodded, then wished he hadn't. "Wait. My mom... Did something happen with my mom?"_

_"Or..." Adam blinked. "Something about moms? Plural?"_

_"Oh, maybe..." Lane clinked her spoon again._

_"Why is my phone buzzing?" Kris asked, looking around for it and blinking in surprise when Lane took it out of her purse. He stared at it. He should know how to work it._

_"Have some coffee." Lane shoved the cup she'd already poured in his direction and watched as Kris drained nearly the entire cup in one slug. "Good thing that was lukewarm or your throat might have gotten burnt."_

_Kris shrugged. "I'm not trying to hit those high notes like Adam."_

_"Nonetheless, I have uses for your throat," Adam said automatically with a leer. He groaned and rubbed his eyebrows. Even his eyebrows hurt._

_Lane laughed. "The innuendo is on automatic right now, isn't it?"_

_"Shut up. And I mean that in a nice way." Adam grinned at Lane, then patted her hand. "Whatever I pay you is not enough. I love you."_

_"I know. I don't do it for money. I do it for love too. And besides I get paid in the memories. Some day when I'm old and grey, I'll look back on these times like last night and..." Lane sighed melodramatically, then grinned. "Bore my kids silly with the stories."_

_"Then I need to make better stories for you!" Adam grinned. Hey, that smile didn't hurt. The aspirin he'd taken when he'd woken up was finally kicking in. "So you don't bore those kids silly... Wait. Last night, something about kids..."_

_Kris mumbled as he stared at his phone. "I dunno... Why is Geoffrey calling me? What did I do?"_

_Lane shrugged. "I may have let him know that it was you who posted that poll--"_

_"Pole dancing!" Adam said abruptly. "Kris... did you go pole dancing? Are there pictures? Oh no, did Kris take a pic of my dick? Are there dick pics?"_

_"Well, I'd have made sure your dick looked nice and big!" Kris defended himself. "Life size!"_

_**Clank!** _

_Lane banged her spoon hard against her water glass. "Listen up, you two. There are no dick pics because I took your phones away from you. After Kris decided to post the question about how parents felt about knowing anything about their children's sex lives on your Twitter, Adam."_

_"Uh-oh." Kris and Adam looked at each other._

_"You're in trouble." Adam pointed at Kris._

_"Ha. I did it on your Twitter." Kris pointed back. "Hey, wait. What were the answers?"_

_Lane took a long sip of tea. She needed the caffeine. She also needed to annoy the crap out of the two men staring impatiently, if somewhat painfully, at her. "No one wants to know anything about their children's sex lives."_

_Kris and Adam stared at her. "Hadehahaha!" Kris exclaimed. "I was right! Ha!"_

_"No fucking way!" Adam gasped, putting his hand over his heart._

_"Way, fucking or otherwise," Lane asserted. She pulled out a laptop. "Look, Hannah -- who just loved all of this, I_ assure _you --"_

_"Oh. That explains the text from Hannah..." Kris mumbled._

_"Yes. Hannah was so thrilled with it all. She was even so kind as to put the results on a spread sheet." Lane pointed at her screen. Hannah needed to get a life, if anyone wanted her opinion and everyone should._

_"I'm dead." Kris groaned as he got up to pace. Those texts from Geoffrey -- he did not want to read them._

_Adam frowned at the spread sheet. "Forget that. Here's the real problem -- I'm wrong! How can that be?" He looked up with hopeful anticipation waiting for some smart-aleck comment from Kris, but no. Of course not. Kris was ignoring him. Adam sat back and pouted, ignoring Lane's laughter. She was a damn lousy audience. Humph._

_Kris flung himself back on the sofa. He pursed his lips as he read a text from Lane that... oh no, Adam had been afraid he'd leave him and go back to Conway with his mother? Oh, wow. That explained a good bit of Miami. He looked up and smiled. "I know it's a shocking turn of events -- the idea that you could be wrong about something."_

_"It is," Adam agreed quickly with a wink in Lane's direction. Finally, Kris was taking his cue. He stood up and stretched. "I think I need reassurance or... comfort...or a blow job."_

_"You might." Lane arched an eyebrow and waited until Kris looked up at her and nodded. Good, he had read her text. "Kris, you might want to start with the reassurance about your presence in his life."_

_"About what?" Adam asked, wrinkling his nose and reaching for his coffee. "What am I missing?"_

_"_ In vino veritas _." Lane smiled. She bent down and kissed Adam's cheek and whispered, "I love you and so does Kris. No one's leaving you."_

_Kris smiled as he pulled Adam toward him and then shoved him down on the sofa. Adam did need reassurance that Kris wasn't going to leave him. That was mostly what that fight had been about. Well, partly. He should've known better than to ask Adam to be anything other than himself on stage unless he was playing a character. "I'll give you all of them. And an apology too. Because you're right -- and shut the fuck up. My mother either could handle the show or she can't, but that was her issue, not yours."_

_"And she did handle it." Adam smiled, then frowned. "By ignoring me."_

_"She ignored you because I was on stage, but that's not the important thing, sweetie." Kris sat down on Adam's lap and slid his hands around Adam's neck and began massaging the muscles he felt tightening back there. "I'll never leave you, Adam. Promise. I love you too much. I'll fight for us, no matter what. Even if that entire town showed up and said they'd throw me a parade if I denounced being gay, I wouldn't leave you. The..." Kris kissed his way up Adam's neck to his lips, those lips with their freckles he loved so much. "The greatest happiness of my life, my entire life, has been these last two years with you. So I promise..."_

_"Promise?"_

_"Promise. On my last thirty-eight cents." Kris patted Adam's arm._

_Lane smiled. "Well, then it's serious."_

_"Much more serious than a pinky swear." Kris smiled. "And... I'm sorry about asking you to change the show. I swear, I don't know what I was thinking that day. It must be the heat. It makes me crazy."_

_"Speaking of crazy." Lane tapped Adam's phone. "Geoffrey wants to talk to you. Call him now."_

_Flushing, Kris went into the bathroom to wash his face with cold water while Adam called his manager._

_"How am I in trouble now, old man?" Adam asked with a grin and a wink in Lane's direction. "Kris actually sent out the tweet!"_

_"Not you, young man." Geoffrey smiled, knowing that Adam liked that phrase. "Nor Kris. It's a good thing the tour is done. Hannah just heard that Perez has gotten wind that Dani's pregnant and living in your house. Time to come home and barricade the fences."_

_"Thanks," Adam said sincerely. "I don't know what I'd do without you."_

_"Neither do I," Geoffrey said drily._

__

 

****

**Brush is perhaps best known for his relationship with American Idol winner and pop star Adam Lambert, a relationship some critics have likened to that of Elvis and 'Colonel' Tom Parker. The comparison, both Brush and Lambert insist, is more apparent than real.**

**Lambert quickly points out that Brush is, 'A friend, but also the first one -- other than my mother -- to call me on my shit. He's no enabler. Nor is he reliant solely upon me for the financial health of his company. He has my best interests in mind not only financially, but creatively which is key for an artist. He'd never encourage me to sell out my integrity for short-term gain and he's always pushed me -- in his very polite way -- to find personal happiness as well as artistic fulfillment."**

**Brush recently remarried his second wife, a development he credits to Lambert and is testament to the nature of their relationship. 'Apparently he should have played the matchmaker in Fiddler on the Roof when he was a lad,' Brush laughs with a reference to Lambert's childhood foray into musical theater. 'He had heard me refer to her on many occasions as the one who got away and decided to do something about it. To my eternal gratitude. Even if he is a control freak."**

**For his own part, Lambert is similarly effusive about not only the friendship he enjoys with his manager, but Brush's steadfast support and energy on his behalf, especially in the wake of multiple scandals -- from the sexualized AMA performance to the news that a former boyfriend was using him for contacts in the music business to a less than flattering nude photograph a sexual partner sold to tabloids.**

**Lambert is quick to note, "That picture was a lie!" His long-time partner, guitarist Kris Allen, who is seated nearby rolls his eyes at the comment, laughs and then wiggles his eyebrows while quipping, "Take it from me. That pic is really proof of how photos can lie, because..."**

**Allen trails off as Lambert laughs and reaches over to squeeze his hand, then in his focused way, directs the conversation back to Brush's professional acumen and support. "He was really my Rock of Gibraltar during those crises. Perhaps it was that British stiff upper lip, but Geoffrey was always cool and calm, all while he and his staff were working damn hard to make everything turn around for me and also giving me essential advice and support. And because Geoffrey is a nosey Nellie, he's also given me tons of personal advice -- which was why I jumped at the chance to meddle in his personal life by finding his second wife and encouraging her to attend one of my parties. I'm glad Geoffrey had a second chance at the love of his life and equally glad his personal and professional lives have achieved balance -- one of the principles he was always urging on me. Busy body!" Lambert ends with a fond smile. He adds, "And I'm not a control freak." When Allen laughs aloud once again, Lambert retorts, "I just like to be in charge!"  
**

 

"That's it, lean back," Adam ordered, making sure Kris followed instructions by gently shoving him back against the edge of the pool.

"There is no way you can suck my cock underwater!" Kris laughed. "No way."

"Ha. I have lungs of steel, remember?" Adam taunted. "You know how long I can hold a note or kiss you. Or suck you."

"Oh, yeah." Kris wiggled back on the built-in banquette seating of the grotto farthest from the house. "And I've been making you swim all the time--"

"Sure. I'm trying out to be captain of the cock sucking swim team." Adam grinned and took a deep breath before sinking under the water. 

"OMFG!" Kris gulped and flailed around in the water, relieved when his hands caught the edge of the pool and Adam's hands gripped his thighs hard. Nice and hard. Hard like his cock in Adam's mouth and ohmigodhewasgonnacumintwoseconds but... He gasped loudly, wondering how the hell Adam was still down there and... He looked down and gasped again. He was probably going to have x-rated porno dreams of mermen and pool boys and oh fucking yeah... He thrust hard and -- 

"ADAMMMMMM!!!" Danielle's shriek made Adam jerk his head up and hit the side of the grotto.

"That woman better be in labor..." Kris groaned as his dick throbbed hot and demandingly, wanting Adam's mouth back on it, finishing it up. 

"I'm in labor. Get in here!"


	48. If Mama ain't happy...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> N.B.: Kudzu is a plant introduced to the US which has overtaken millions of acres of land in the southern US. 
> 
> Rating: R/N-17

**Chapter 48.1: If mama ain't happy, nobody's happy**

"Call your mother." Adam stared at Kris, then took a deep breath while looking at the door. AKA the entry to the pits of hell.

Kris laughed. "You're way too obvious. Try again. Like say, as you go back in the delivery room."

"You can do it, son," Dani's father, Michael, urged.

"I'm not going back in there." Adam took a step away from the door. AKA the entry to the pits of despair.

"Go back in," Leila said automatically, turning a page in her Oprah magazine.

Turning to Michael, Adam pointed "Hey. She's your daughter. You should--" 

Michael shook his head and stayed planted on his chair. "Not gonna happen, Ad. Remember what happened when Dani had appendicitis?"

"Oh. Yeah. You fainted in the OR waiting room." Adam smirked. 

"See?" Michael nodded. "You're a much tougher man than I am. So get back in that room and listen to her scream at you."

Adam looked around desperately for a diversion. His eyes lit on the furniture and he turned to Kris. "Hey, hedgehog, those chairs are even uglier than your mushroom chair."

"That's not possible," Leila noted without looking up from her magazine.

"Hey, why does everyone rag on my chair?" Kris complained.

"Because it's ugly," everyone responded.

"My chair bein' ugly does not exempt you from goin' back in there and givin' Dani's mom a break," Kris pointed out with a smug smile as Adam deflated in front of him. "I know you."

"You'll pay for that!" Adam warned without taking a step. "And I'm not leaving until you call your mother." Ha. That would buy him some time. 

"She's gonna be mad at me." Kris froze. That had sounded like a whine. He was too old to whine, especially with a baby on the way. He should man up. He should. Really. Maybe later. "But... later. I'll do it later. Like... when we know the baby's name and all. I'll send pictures!"

"Do it now." Leila looked up this time. "Stop prevaricating and do it. And that goes for you too, Adam." She pointed at Kris, then at Adam. "On the count of three, you both will do what you need to do. Hear me?"

"Yes, ma'am," Adam and Kris said, looking at each other and sighing.

"Good boys. Now, 1, 2, 3..." 

 

"Hey, Mama." Kris took a deep breath and looked at the clock over the ugly orange banquette of chairs. He was pretty damn sure they were uglier than his mushroom chair. At least his mushroom chair wasn't vinyl. 

"Krissy. What's up?"

"Welll...." Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "Before you yell at me--"

"No good story will follow that sentence." Kim sat down. "I'm sitting. So shoot. Wait -- did you two make a sex tape?"

"Whaaaat?" Kris spluttered. "No! No way! Adam's way too paranoid--"

"Oh, so you'd do it if Adam weren't so paranoid?" Kim grinned. It was such a joy to be able to get Kris wound up. This new tendency of Kris to go -- as Adam said -- all hedgehog was more entertaining than Nascar. She'd bet he was rubbing one hand through his hair until it stood up.

Running his hand through his hair, Kris ignored the amused, indulgent look Adam was giving him while drinking what was probably one too many cups of coffee. He turned his back before Adam could whisper, 'Hedgehog' and continued, "I would not." Although he so totally would. He'd love to see Adam, full-length, all sides, all those freckles...

"Kris? Yoo-hooooooo?" Kim yodeled. "Are you there? Or contemplating doing a sex tape?"

"Stop it." Kris shook his head. 

"What's she asking? You look all hedgehoggy," Adam observed.

"Ha!" Kim laughed. "I did it."

Kris sighed. "I'm so easy."

"Yes, you are!" Kim and Adam said in unison.

Kim burst out laughing as she heard Adam's voice. "I knew I was gonna like that boy."

Leila shook her head. Adam was such an immovable object. But not this time. She flung her magazine aside, stood up and advanced on her son. 

Adam looked at her, his eyes widened, his mouth opened and he took a step back, then another, until he banged up against the door. AKA the entry to the pits of hell. He sighed, recognizing the implacable look on his mother's face, took a breath and went back in. 

"Yeah, yeah. Now do you wanta know why I called -- which was not so you and Adam could tag team me!"

"Of course, I want to know. I'm your mother. I'm here to listen."

Kris snorted. He took a deep breath and blurted out, "You're about to be a kinda sorta grandmother. As in before the day is over."

"Whaaaat?" Kim shot to her feet. "What? Did you get a girl pregnant? How?"

"No, no. I didn't--"

"I thought you liked boys only. Are you bisexual?" Kim wrinkled her forehead. She was working hard on the gay stuff and didn't get the bisexual business and wait. A baby. Was coming? She gasped. "Oh no, did you cheat on Adam? Is he throwing you out? Do you need money? Do you need to move back home--"

"He's not moving back here and we're not giving that son of yours money, Kim!" Neal yelled down the hall. 

Kim yelled back, "Bless your heart, my son is always welcome in my house!" She swallowed, then asked more softly, "So, Krissy. What's happening?"

Kris shook his head, determined to ignore his father for as long as possible. "I now know where I get my tendency to leap frog over assumptions straight to false conclusions."

"What else can I leap frog over but assumptions if you're not givin' me actual information?"

"Oh. Good point." Kris nodded. "Well, the reason why you'd yell at me is because I didn't tell you sooner, but Adam's best friend, Danielle, is havin' a baby and Adam's gonna be the daddy and I guess I'm the daddy number 2 or gay uncle or--"

"You're gonna be a guncle?!" Kim shouted, her heart racing from excitement.

"Guncle?"

"Yes. I watch Tori Spelling's show. Her kids have two gay uncles. Guncles. See? I'm on top of the gay lifestyle these days," Kim announced proudly. "I'm watchin' reality tv and doin' my homework." She paused, then smiled eagerly. "Wait. So I'm gonna be a kinda sorta grandmother?"

Kris blinked. His mom was learning about the quote unquote gay lifestyle by watching reality tv? Oh hell. He swallowed, filing that information away for a later discussion. But at least she was trying, right? "Yes, yes, you'll be a grandmother. Or something. I don't know what you want to call it--"

"I'll take grandmother," Kim said quickly. "That is, if it's okay?"

"If you want to--"

"Oh, I want to! That is, if it's okay with this Danielle. I don't wanta step over the line--" Kim paused when Kris snorted. 

"Sure, Mama. You _never_ step over lines."

Kim looked over her shoulder in the direction of her husband's continued mutterings. Sitting up straight, she said softly, "It's a mama's job to step over lines for their children." 

 

"I can't watch the baby come out!" Adam whispered desperately to his mother hours later. "That's crossing a line I cannot cross. I won't be able to unsee what I have seen. I won't do it. I can't do it. I'll diiiiiiiiiiiiiiie if I do it!" 

"Why not? For godssakes, Adam, don't tell me you're scared!" Leila stared up at her son, trying to understand. He had been alternating with Dani's mom to support Dani through the endless labor -- poor girl, twenty-two hours of it already -- and now when it was almost over, he was freaking out? 

"No. I... can't see... Dani's...." Adam twisted his hands together and looked over his mother's head.

Kris looked at Adam, then at Leila, then back at Adam and burst out laughing. "Ohboyohboyohboy... Mr. I Can Say or Do Anything with My Parents all of a sudden can't say something to his mother? Ha! Hadeehaha!"

"No. It's not the hadeehaha that's the problem, you little shit." Adam crossed his arms over his chest. "It's her...you know... hooha. I can't see that. Her hooha."

"What?" Leila asked, putting her hand up to hide her own grin. "What? Her....vagina?"

"Mom!" Adam hissed, putting his own hand up to cover his eyes. "I can't believe you said that!"

"We're in the labor and delivery section of a hospital," Leila pointed out. "I imagine the word vagina is said quite frequently here."

"Not in connection with my best friend!"

"Oh, so it's _Dani's_ vagina that's the problem?" Kris asked, widening his eyes and biting his lip to keep from laughing when Leila elbowed him in solidarity.

"Well, it's different when it's a vagina you _know_!" Adam explained. Honestly, wasn't it obvious what the problem was? Did he have to explain _everything_?

"Oh, so you know Dani's vagina?" Leila gasped. "I'm _shocked._ "

"Me too!" Kris agreed, nodding. He added a loud gasp for good measure. 

Leila shook her head. "I had no idea you and Dani had-- well, you know. Done things that would enable you to see her hooha. Kris, did you?"

"Me either!" Kris agreed again, then turned to Leila. "Don't you think that's the sort of thing he oughta have told me? I mean, _really._ It's kinda significant."

"I'll say!" Leila tsked tsked. "Really, Adam, if you and Dani had a... fling at some point, Kris should have been informed. I'm sure he's going to feel quite awkward now."

"But--" Adam tried.

"Don't you, Kris?" Leila prodded. "I bet you do." 

"I doooo!" Kris turned his head and looked down. He debated, then scuffed the toe of his sneaker on the floor, hoping he wasn't pushing his luck. Looking up from under his lashes, he caught Adam's incredulous look and realized he might be playing it too broad and hurried to add, "It's going to take some time to process this news that Adam -- the _gay_ love of my life -- and you know, I wasn't really gay until I met Adam, Leila--"

Leila gasped and put her hand over her mouth, then pulled it down to pat Kris' shoulder. "I didn't know that. So my son turned you? A fine, straight, god-fearing Christian boy who was once Little Mr. Little Rock? Oh, the shaaaaaaaaaaaame of it alllllllllll...."

"What the actual fuck is wrong with you two?" Adam muttered, rolling his eyes and leaning against the wall. "I'm in crisis here. Let me know when you're done with the show."

Dani's father shrugged. "Well, I'm having fun. Do go on."

"Thank you, thankyouverymuch." Kris grinned. "Yes, indeedy, Miz Lambert, your son turned me from the straight paths of righteousness and chitlins and hush puppies and fried chicken and... dump cake! I kin never go hame agin!"

"You make dump cake all the time!" Adam protested. "Now, c'mon. You have to keep the story believable. Plus your accent was ridiculous."

Kris sniffed. Critiques, all he got were critiques. "Well, Leila, the truth is that I might be... overwrought. Yes, indeed, that's it. The idea that Adam had... personal relations with female parts belonging to his best friend--"

"I know I'm shocked." Leila nodded. "I thought Adam told me everything. When do you think this happened, Kris?"

"I don't knooooooooooooooow...." Kris whined. "I can't think about it. I might..." Kris flopped back in his chair and covered his eyes. "Die. Just die."

Michael stared and muttered, "I really wish I was taping this. I'd get a ton of YouTube hits."

"We didn't do anything!" Adam exclaimed, waving his hands around. "I mean, that's sick. Totally sick. Really, Mom. Kris. What's wrong with you?" 

Leila caught Adam's hands and squeezed them. "How much caffeine have you had to drink today?"

"I've made a few Starbucks runs..." Kris admitted. "For a few talls--"

"Oh great. That's what Mr. Hyperactive needs, gallons of caffeine." Leila sighed and glared at Kris. "We pay you to keep him in line, not get him going."

"Pay me?" Kris asked.

"Yes. In home-cooked meals. There will be no more brisket for you, young man!" Leila shook her head, reached around her son, put her hand on his back and pushed. "Now, listen up, son. You're going to put on your big boy boxers and walk in there and watch a baby come out of Dani's vagina. Got that?"

"But Mooooommmmm..." Adam whined, then stopped when the door opened and Danielle's mother came out. 

"Adam." Elaine put her hand on Adam's arm and tugged him, laughing when he did not move. The boy was still an immovable object at times "You need to get in there. Dani said and I quote-- " Elaine bit her lip to keep from laughing. "'That he'd better get his ass in here now or I'm going to call Perez and give him details and a _picture_ of the time I came to visit you in Germany and you let that transvestite with green hair--'"

"I'm going in!" Adam exclaimed as he pulled open the door. Lowering his voice, he muttered, "That bitch...."

"You better not be talking to me!" Dani yelled, pausing in her slow circumnavigation of the birthing room. Walking was supposed to make the labor move along faster. Ha. Ha!

"Of course not. Why ever would I be calling you a bitch?" Adam asked in his most soothing tones as he took cautious steps towards Dani, keeping one eye on the door. The door aka Escape Hatch from Hell. 

"Do not talk to me in that tone of voice!" Dani smacked Adam's side. "I know you. I know when you use that that that placating tone that you think the person is fucking crazy and I'm not crazy!"

"Of course, you're not..." Adam began, then seeing the glare Dani was directing his way, stopped. "Okay, here's the deal, Dani. I don't know what you want me to do or say. Just tell me and I'll do it."

"And aren't those words you wish every man would say?" Dani's mother asked with a smile, then frowned as Dani gasped and almost squatted. "What is it?" 

"It feels like I'm making the biggest poop ever. Like I've been constipated for months and it's been building up inside me and I'm trying to push it out --"

"I get it! Ewww." Adam wrinkled his nose. "I've cleaned up the fluid when your water broke at home and called the nurse when you vomited up that orange popsicle and looked away when you made a poop without realizing it, but c'mon. TMI."

"TMI? TMI?" Dani shrieked. "How about that time you told me about the scissors method of opening--" She stopped abruptly and grunted. "I think I need to... squat? Like I"m making a poop, but not?"

Elaine pushed the call button for the nurse. "It's time. That's a sign. It's time."

"Making a poop is a sign?" Adam asked in confusion.

"Didn't you go to those classes with Dani?" Elaine asked. 

"I did. But I don't remember anything about pooping being a sign!"

 

"Why are they talking about pooping?" Kris asked, his ear against the door.

"Step away from the door, Kris." Leila pulled Kris' arm. 

"But I don't get it..."

 

"Is that Kris?" Dani pointed at the door. "If he's standing there, eavesdropping, like some creeper, he can be in here, holding my hand!"

"You want me to get Kris in here?" Adam asked, bounding forward eagerly. 

"Yes!" Dani grunted. 

"Oh goodie." Adam flung open the door and grabbed Kris' arm. "She wants you in here too. Aren't you _lucky_?"

"Noooo...." Kris cried as the door closed behind him. 

**Bang!**

 

"This is really hard..." Kris moaned. 

"Normally, I'd be all over that comment," Adam said absently, wincing as Dani took another breath to push, then squeezed his hand so hard he was sure he'd heard bones crack. Oh well, it's not like he needed his hands to sing or anything. "But right now? Umm...ow...yeah. And I thought my hernia was bad." 

Keeping his eyes on Dani's sweaty face, watching her mother blot the moisture away, then gently push her hair back, Kris sucked in an anxious breath. Ohgodno, she was gonna push again and he was sure, sure that a vein was going to explode in his head or he was gonna fall over dead, because every time she took a breath to push, he took a breath too and then forgot to breathe out again and....Efffffffffffff... She was breathing again and so could he. "Really hard. Don't you think, Adam? Isn't this really hard? Are you okay?" 

"I'm good. How're you doing?" Adam asked, glancing over at Kris. Damn, his face was white above that hideous plaid shirt. "I should have made you pick a different shirt. Our poor child is going to be imprinted for life if he or she sees plaid first thing."

Dani giggled, then gasped, bearing down once again, focusing her attention on a flower on the wallpaper behind the doctor's back. She could do this, she could. "Okaaaaaay...." she hissed as she took a breather before pushing again. "It has to be time, right? I feel like I have a bowling ball in my anus."

"Know the feeling..." Kris quipped, wiping the sweat from his forehead with the hem of his shirt. 

"Flatterer." Adam smiled, then laughed as Kris looked at Dani's mom and blushed bright red. "You're almost as red as your ugly shirt."

"I just say you have a big dick and you insult my shirt?"

"They're both true statements." Adam shrugged. "The truth shall set you free--"

"I'd like to be free of this baby right now!" Dani cried out as another roll of downward pressure made her push again. 

"Okay, great job, Dani!" The doctor looked up and smiled. "The baby is ready to come now. I need you to focus and you can get this over with really quickly, okay?"

"Okay..." Dani panted, trying to roll with the pain instead of fighting against. "It's like Mr. Miyagi..." She looked up at Adam, hoping he would get the reference because she wasn't sure she had enough breath to tell him.

Frowning at the non-sequitur, Adam stared at her, then nodded. "Oh! Like that time we took the martial arts class and the instructor said to use the force, not work against it."

"Exactly." Dani looked up at the mirror, then shook her head. It was too much... She focused on the flower on the wall and took short even breaths, hoping for some control. My god, this was the most out of control experience of her life and that included the time she'd went to Burning Man with Adam and Neil and Brad. "I really want all of you to watch the baby come out!" Dani ordered, squeezing her mother's hand. "So you can tell me later."

"I can take pictures if you want," Elaine offered.

"No, no. I don't want any pictures of my hooha in the world," Dani objected. "And I can't watch because it makes me lose focus. So please? Just watch and tell me true later, okay? Tell me. Adam --" 

"Dani... I'll do anything else, but... I can't. I'm not looking down there." Adam shook his head as he watched the doctor reach for ohfuckascalpel. 

"Oh for the love of chitlins," Kris mumbled. "I'll do it. I'll watch our child appear -- WAIT! What are you do... _eeeeeeeeenng_?" He asked the doctor, his voice squeaking at the end.

The doctor answered automatically as she made the cut. "An episiotomy. It was part of Dani's birth plan if she showed signs of tearing the tissue." She looked up at Dani to wait for her nod. When she did, the doctor explained helpfully, "We use the scalpel to make the cut and--" 

_Thud_

"Kris just fainted," Elaine observed as a nurse rushed forward to catch Kris before he hit the floor. "Should I be worried?"

"Ha!" Adam crowed as the nurse who'd caught him, shoved him into a chair and waved smelling salts -- who knew there really was such a thing? Huh. "I outlasted him."

"Yeah, you're a tough guy." Dani rolled her eyes, then grabbed the collar of his tee-shirt. "Now prove you're a tough guy and get down that and watch our baby come out of my hooha."

"I...iuhnoyesnoreallyno..." Adam spluttered, then choked as Dani tugged harder and shoved him down the bed at the same time. Okay, he could do this. He'd done worse things in his time. He'd... roomed with _Danny Gokey_ for four weeks during Idol! Yessiree, if he survived Gokey in his own room, he could survive this. Yup, yup, yup, ohbythegods, it was Dani's hooha. And... "Ohmigods, it's a a aaa head! With hair! It's a baby!" He shrieked.

Kris shook his head and jumped to his feet. "Where? Where?"

"Coming out of Dani's hooha! Where do you think?" Adam blurted out. "I know you're gay, but c'mon. Just because you don't use it, doesn't mean you can't know what it is when you see it. Like, in your case, a good haircut."

"Or in your case, the stove." Kris glared at Adam, because that was better than looking at Dani's hooha. 

"Stop. Making. Me. Laugh!" Dani ordered in-between breaths.

"Okay, one last push and you'll see your baby!" The doctor encouraged.

 

"I'm goin' back out there to see this baby," Kim told her husband. "Don't try to argue with me." 

"It's not even your real grandchild!" Neil argued. He wondered why he was bothering. He hadn't won an argument with his wife in months. It had all started to go to hell in a handbasket when she'd seen those videos of the Oscar red carpet and nothing had looked up since. She was on a tear and she wasn't letting go. 

"Good as!" Kim shook her head. 

"This whole thing, this set up, it's _unnatural._ It's not a real family. Not even close--"

"What makes a family is love, not blood. And look around you, Neil. Look around Conway. Look around. I have. I've been looking--"

"Obviously, that's a danger!" Danger to his home life, Neil thought as he watched the stubborn clenching of Kim's jaw line. Kris had inherited that jaw line and stubbornness. Really, it was Kim's fault Kris was so damn stubborn about this gay business. If he wasn't as cantankerous as his mother, he'd have realized he could choose to be with a nice Christian girl back home here in Conway. 

"Seeing reality? Danger to what?" Kim challenged. "It's not like this traditional idea of married husband and wife and kids is all there is any more. Not any more. Look at your own brother. Or my cousin. Or even Pearline -- how many time's that gal been married anyway?"

"Her husbands have died."

"And that's not weird to you?" Kim asked. 

"Not since they all died of snake bites!"

"Ha!" Kim shook her head. "I have my doubts that they were just accidents. Anyway. Lots of blended families--"

"Which are wrong! If people stayed together, there'd be no blending. Just straight-up normal families the way God intended."

"Wrong, smong. Yapping about it's not gonna change reality. Reality is... our son and his partner are gonna be daddies. Which means I'm gonna be a grandma. And I'm gonna love that baby and be a grandma, just like I've been hoping for years now. You're not goin' rain on my parade and if you know what's good for you, you'd stop even tryin'!"

"What does that mean?"

"It means, you'd be wise to man up and be not only a better father to Kris, but a grandfather to this sweet child." Kim nodded and stomped into the kitchen. She was... goin' to make a dump cake. That was it. A cake. And then look on the interent for some cute baby clothes.

 

 

"You're a grandma!" Adam said, as he flung open the door with a huge grin for his mother and Dani's father. "And you're a grandpa!"

"Boy or girl?" Michael asked as they rushed forward into the room.

"Girl. Dani named her Emmaline Stori Lambert." Adam frowned as his mother held back to give the three Storis time together, then started to cry. "Mom?"

"I'm so happy." Leila wiped her eyes as Dani smiled at her and beckoned her closer.

"Come and meet your granddaughter," Dani urged.

Leila cried harder. 

"Mooommmmm..." Adam whined even as he wrapped his arms around his mother and they hugged each other tight. He wasn't sure who was shaking more -- him or his mom -- but at least they were holding each other up. 

"Don't mind him!" Dani called out. "He was crying a few seconds ago."

"I was," Adam admitted with a soft smile as he looked back over at Dani holding the small bundle in white, surrounded by her parents and his mother as they all took turns holding the baby and taking pictures. "Kris was bawling though. Once he came to from having a fit of the vapors like some Victorian maiden. That chair over there was his fainting couch. All he needed was a corset to complete the look."

"Huh?" Kris blinked at him. "Having you been readin' that Steampunk stuff again? While _I've_ been reading What To Expect The First Year?!"

Adam smirked. "And yet I bet you'll faint when it's your turn to clean the belly button."

Kris sighed. "I'm never livin' that down, am I?"

Dani snorted. "Ha. Like Adam won't find something to freak out over in the first week?"

"True," everyone but Adam agreed.

"Hey!"Adam protested, then cleared his face. "Well, if you're all so busy mocking me, then I guess it's my turn to hold the baby -- my daughter." He grinned as he swooped down and plucked the baby from Danielle's arms. "Here, I am, baby girl. Let me explain to you from the outset the important truth that I am the only one with sense in the family." 

"Suddenly, Elaine, I'm filled with fear at poor Emmaline's future," Leila teased.

"Humph..." Adam sniffed, then looked down at the tiny baby in his arms, staring up at him so seriously. "You'll be the one who looks up to me and thinks I'm the bee's knees. I know it."

"Bee's knees? That sounds like Arkansas." Kris smiled. 

"It does. It must spread. Like that kudzu. Hey, Dani, your next baby--"

"Is not being named Kudzu." Dani laughed, then smiled as her mother gestured for Adam to lean down for more pictures. 

"Poor baby, are you going to end up with some shirt-tail sort of southern accent?" Adam cooed. "We all just hate those southern accents."

Danielle laughed softly. Adam loved Kris' accent and Kris knew it. You could always tell when Kris wanted something because that accent got stronger. Not that it happened that often, since it seemed to her that Kris got his way whenever he really wanted it. Which... Hmm. Was she going to have to be the bad cop to the boys' spoiling Emmaline?

Elaine wiped her eyes and reached into the tote bag she'd brought with her. Pulling out a small pink dress, she held it up to Dani. "This is the dress I put you in for your ride home from the hospital. I thought you'd like to have it."

"Oh mom..." Dani touched the ruffle along the hem and started to cry.

Adam quickly handed Emmaline back to Dani, hoping she'd stop crying. Instead, she cried harder. Oh hell, now he was going to cry again. And there was Kris, sniffling and his mother and...

"Oh wow, that's right!" Leila exclaimed. "I finally have a little girl I can dress up. I can't wait! Ooh, all the little dresses!"

"Humph." Adam sniffed, laughing when the baby started at the sound. "Hear that, Emmaline? The grandmas want a little girl --"

Kris exclaimed. "Oh god, my mother. I need to call her!" 

 

"Well?" Kim held back from yelling the minute she answered her phone.

"It's a girl!" Kris exclaimed. "A beautiful little girl! Her name's Emmaline!"

"What a pretty pretty name. I love it. Oooh, a little girl. Are you sending me a picture?"

"As soon as I get off the phone."

"A little girl! I can buy the pretty little outfits I never got to buy for my children!"

Kris laughed and looked over at Dani. "You made my mother happy. She's apparently been waitin' all these years to buy pink dresses too."

"With lots and lots of ruffles!" Kim exclaimed.

"Oh hell. Mama's gonna try and get this poor child into one of those big ol' pageant princess dresses..." Kris hissed, with his finger over the mouthpiece of his phone. "We're gonna have to run for the hills!"

"Dont worry, Emmaline," Adam told her as he bent down to look in her wide blue eyes. "I'll make sure you're the coolest little girl in pre-school. It will be hot pink and leather jackets and really cool boots with rhinestone studs on the heels..."

"This child is going to have the most interesting closet in her entire pre-school class," Leila predicted. 

"Of course she will. She's my daughter!" Adam laughed.

 

 

The paparazzi paced impatiently outside Cedars Sinai Hospital. A tip that Adam Lambert's BFF had delivered a baby here had come in and since everyone knew that Lambert and his BFF were joined at the hip these days, it was a good opportunity to get a shot of Lambert without his make-up. 

 

Dani looked around the room sleepily as she rubbed her eyes. She smiled as she saw Leila passing the baby to Kris while her mother took a picture and her father took a long drink from his coffee cup. "Where's Adam?"

"Adam went to get some presents out of the car."

"For me? Because I deserve them!" Dani groaned as she shifted in the bed. She smiled gratefully as her mother handed her another ice pack and then laughed as both Kris and her father turned aside as she placed them between her legs. "Really. I deserve presents. What are they called....Oh, I remember. Push presents!"

"For you?" Kris asked, looking down at Emmaline with a smile. He knew her blue eyes were the blue eyes every baby had, but he'd like to imagine they were Adam's eyes. So he would. "You have a precious little baby girl. Isn't that enough?"

Dani smiled as she looked at the baby in Kris' arms and then at the love in his eyes as he stared at her so intently. "You're right. This is the greatest gift. Ever."

"Well, we do have gifts for you too." Kris smiled as he thought of the beautiful diamond necklace of interlocking rings Adam had designed and had Tiffany's create. "It's pretty awesome," he whispered. "So make sure you act excited or Adam will just _diiiiiie._ "

Dani nodded, unwilling to test the safety of her voice. Adam and Kris had been beyond awesome during the pregnancy and now... 

"So for the baby. We have some outfits -- we didn't know if it was a boy or girl, so we bought both kinds. And some toys. Some stuffed animals. Some books. A teeny tiny little guitar. And a piano like the one Schroeder plays in the Snoopy cartoons and--" 

"You two are going to spoil her rotten, aren't you?" 

"No. I will. I'll be the good cop and Adam will be the bad cop." Kris smiled as he gingerly touched the baby's hand, then smiled even more widely when she curled her fingers around his. 

"Are we talking about Halloween costumes already?" Adam asked as he rushed through the door, carrying bags.

Dani laughed. "No, we're talking about Kris' latest fantasy for your role-playing games."

"Shhh!" Adam hissed. "The baby!"

Kris and Dani looked at each other and cracked up.

"And your mom, Dani!"

"I've heard worse from you for years!" Elaine rolled her eyes. "And sat next to Leila at a few of your concerts. Including one that involved fellating a--"

"Ohmigod, the baby is right here! None of you are taking your responsibilities seriously enough," Adam complained, holding his hands out to Kris. "Let me take her." 

"Are you getting this, Mom?" Dani asked her mother as Kris reluctantly placed the baby into Adam's waiting arms and watched him cuddle her close. 

"The transformation of Adam into the world's strictest and most over-protective parent?" Danielle's mom grinned as she looked through the viewfinder of her camera. "You bet." 

"I'm not going to be...." Adam began, then stopped. Oh hell. What kind of parent was he going to be? 

"Oh puh-leeze.You're strict enough with our pool boy!" Kris noted with a grin.

"I realize I may still be a little high from the Demoral, but what pool boy? When did we hire a pool boy..." Dani began, then seeing the smirk on Kris' face, shook her head. "You two..."

"Dani had a nice nap, but you two look dead on your feet. You should go home to sleep yourselves," Elaine advised.

"She's right. Let me have my daughter and you two go sleep," Dani urged as Adam laid the baby back in her arms. 

"Are you sure?" Adam asked, leaning forward to touch Dani's cheek. "Because we can stay if you want."

"No, no. My mom's here and you two should go home and sleep." Dani smiled at her mother. "I have it on good authority that we should sleep whenever we get the chance."

"She's right!" Kris agreed. Taking Adam's hand, he gently shoved into his side and whispered, "Remember? You were showing the pool boy all about underwater suction?" 

 

Kris reached his hand out automatically, but his fingers met only rumpled sheets. Rubbing his eyes, he looked blearily at Adam's side of the bed. 

"We should sleep, remember?" Kris asked, levering up on one elbow to watch Adam's back as he looked out the window. Adam was very still. Which was unnatural. Either Adam had a migraine -- in which case, he wouldn't be looking out the window -- or he was..."Are you freaking out?"

"Yup." 

"It's a very quiet freak out."

"I'm practicing for when the baby comes home. Babies need to sleep." Adam forced himself to stillness. He was not going to yell or run around or get wasted or even swim. He. Was. Not. Because he was in control. 

Kris waited and watched. When Adam kept perfectly still and silent, Kris shivered. "Okay, now you're freaking me out. You're not being hyper."

"I'm... gathering my focal points." Adam forced himself to breathe slowly and evenly. He had to have learned something useful from those hideous childbirth classes with those hideous videos. "So I can coalesce them into a locus of my own power." 

"Of course you are." As Kris' eyes grew accustomed to the darkness, he saw the tightness in the muscles of Adam's back and got slowly out of the bed to walk toward him. 

Adam stiffened as Kris wrapped his arms around him from behind. Oh great, Kris was comforting him. Great. "It's a more effective way of channeling my needs and desires and energies--"

"What the _hell_ are you talking about?"

"I went to visit this shaman."

"Of course you did. But where?" 

"In Weho."

"Of course." Kris rolled his eyes. Because an authentic shaman was going to be found amongst the gay bars and Whole Foods store and sushi places. He sighed and rested his head on Adam's back. "Without telling me."

Adam frowned. "I swear I can hear your eyes rolling in your head. You think it was stupid. So I didn't need to see you rolling your eyes, while you placate me."

"Not stupid," Kris protested automatically, having heard the tentative quality or was it self-derision in Adam's voice? And damn, Adam realized that sometimes he was just placating him? Oh hell, his ass was gonna be grass if... Focus, Allen, on the important point here, he told himself, that Adam was nervous. "Now that Emmaline's here, you're anxious about being a dad again, aren't you?"

"Honestly?" Adam sighed, watching the moisture of his breath condense on the window pane. "I'm terrified. What if I screw up? Oh hell, we all know I'm gonna screw up. I do that--"

"We all do that!" Kris hurried to interrupt what he knew was going to turn into one of Adam's warp-speed rants. "We _all_ do. In fact, Adam--"

"But I screw up in public. Which is embarrassing--"

"Sweetie, that was a long time ago!" Kris protested. He'd thought Adam was over worrying about the old days.

"I'm gonna embarrass that precious child. I know it. Plus I rush into things and I'm a control freak -- what if I try to control Emmaline and then she hates me for it? What if I embarrass her? And she's gonna be a celebrity's kid. Total nightmare. And--"

"Shhhh...." Kris gently ran his hands over Adam's chest, feeling the slickness of sweat and heated skin under his fingers. "All parents embarrass their kids. It's natural. Even if we are the coolest dads ever, we'll still embarrass her. That's the way it goes. It's like the natural order of the universe or somethin'. And she'll survive it just like we survived it. It's okeydokey, okay?" 

"Okay. I can get that." Adam nodded. His dad had embarrassed him a time or two, but Kris was right -- he survived and his dad had ended up being pretty damn cool. "But what about the control stuff?"

"What about the fact that _I_ can be too passive and easy-going? Dani and I are here too, you know. You're not alone. We'll all be good checks and balances on each other. I'll be too laid back, you'll be too controlling and Dani'll be just right. Ha. We're like the Three Bears!"

"The Three Bears..." Adam smiled and turned around within the circle of Kris' arms. "Aren't you worried about being a dad?"

"Adam...." Kris held Adam's hands. "Honestly, I'm nervous too. It's not like I have a good role model to draw on. But you know what? Here's my thought -- No matter what we do, we're gonna be better dads than my father, right?"

"Oh. That's true." Adam nodded. "And even with an asshole for a father, you turned out to be the most awesome man I know."

"Kick-ass awesome, let me remind you!" Kris teased, relieved that he felt Adam's muscle relax at least a bit. "You know..." He ran his hands up Adam's arms, then looped them around Adam's neck. "I know a good way to relieve some stress."

"Do you?" Adam smiled. "Let me get my shorts and --"

"Get your shorts?" Kris echoed in confusion.

"Yeah. To go swimming. But I guess I don't need any, right? There are no paps out in the bushes. So we could go swimming nude. That'd be great." Adam nodded, hiding his grin as Kris stared up at him incredulously. "That's what you meant by a way to reduce stress, right?" He paused and waited for Kris to suck in an annoyed breath. 1, 2, Success! "Swimming?" He paused again when Kris slid his hands down to his chest and pushed, pushed him back towards the bed. "You're always telling me to go swimming as a way to-- Ooof!" Adam shrieked loudly, perhaps more loudly than necessary, but what the hell, this was probably the last time they were going to be alone in this house for how long and maybe he should get this room sound proofed and... "Oh, Kris, what _are_ you doing?" He sucked in a hopeful breath as Kris knelt on the bed between his legs.

"Getting you ready to fuck me. Hard." Kris licked a long wet line from the base of Adam's cock to the tip, then teased the slit, gratified that Adam was erect by the time he'd flicked his tongue three times. Kinda like Dorothy clicking her shoes.

"Are you sure?" Adam curled his hands around Kris' biceps and flipped him underneath him. "Because we can just go swimming."

"The only wetness I want right now is your come inside me. Got it?" Kris glared at Adam while reaching his hand back under the pillows. 

"I don't know. You keep telling me that swimming is--" Adam laughed as Kris crossed his eyes and then flung the tube of lube at him. "Oh, so you want a different option? Well, I'm all about optional life choices, aren't I?" 

"Just. Fuck. Me." Kris waited impatiently while Adam took his time with the lube. He drummed his fingers against the bed, then grinned himself as he spread his legs further apart and slid his hand between his legs. "Or I can always get started without you..." When Adam shoved his hands away, then seconds later, slid inside Kris until he was buried to the hilt, Kris grabbed at him and gasped, "Or not. Better with you, always. Now... Fuck me. For stress relief... Oh hell yeah, right there..." 

 

"Are you sleeping?" Adam asked, his voice a whisper of sound. He had been drifting in and out of sleep. He gently stroked the the taut skin of Kris' stomach, unsure if minutes or hours had passed. 

"Yes," Kris whispered back, snuggling back into Adam's embrace. "I'm dead to the world."

"God, what a snot." Adam sighed. "Who _knew_ you were such a snot? I'm pretty sure I didn't check off the snotty attitude box on my order for the perfect boyfriend at the boyfriend store!"

"Complain to Geoffrey about his poor customer service," Kris sniped as he rolled over to face Adam. "Well, of course, I'm awake!" 

"What are you thinking?" Adam asked, lifting a heavy hand to brush the hair off of Kris' forehead.

"I'm thinking..." Kris wiggled deeper into Adam's embrace, tangling their legs together. "That after watching the baby come out of --"

Shuddering, Adam warned, "Don't _even_ say it. I may -- no, that's wrong. I _will_ never recover from seeing that. In fact, I will--"

"Okay." Kris smothered his giggles against Adam's chest as Adam carried on while he kept giggling. When Adam finally trailed off, Kris kissed Adam's chest, then since it was there, just kinda waiting for him, kissed his nipple. Then since, why not? He licked it. Then again when Adam's muscles twitched at him. Which was surely a sign he wanted more. Sliding his thigh between Adam's legs, he pressed up, gently, sighing when he felt Adam's cock waking up. Damn, he was a lucky man. He moved his hips closer to Adam's and sighed. A lucky man in many ways. Oh hell yeah. "Okay, let's put it this way. I'll never complain about how big you are again."

"Ha! You never complain!" Adam scoffed. 

"Because I'm that type of guy...who gives and gives and gives..." Kris sniffed, rolled onto his back, then in his best imitation of Brad, put the back of his hand languidly over his forehead and sniffed again. He sighed. Loudly. Then sighed again and whispered, "The kind of guy who--"

"Is a size queen." Adam grinned, then laughed as Kris shoved at him before wiggling close and giggling. He waited a moment, counting because if theater had taught him nothing, it had taught him that timing was everything, then added, "Besides, you didn't actually watch the baby coming out."

Leaning up on one elbow, Kris glared down at Adam's smirky face. "Yes, I did!"

"No, you didn't. You had your hands over your face."

"I was peeking through my fingers."

"Peeking through your fingers?" Adam laughed, then poked Kris' ass. "Wimp. Seriously, dude. A wimp." 

"I'm not a wimp!" Kris retorted, rolling on top of Adam. 

"You fainted. Fainted." Adam smirked his smuggest smirk, knowing it would seriously agitate Kris. He liked it when Kris went total hedgehog on him. He was also damn fond of Kris wiggling on top of him too and was willing to do quite a lot to feel more of that. "The nurse had to use smelling salts on you." 

"I'm tough!" Kris patted around the nightstand until he found the lube. He coated his fingers, then his ass, before sliding his hand over Adam's cock, then down over his smooth balls. "I take your cock up my ass. Only a tough guy could do that." 

"Oooh, tough guy?" Adam laughed, then moaned as Kris' fingers hit a spot that made him shiver and open his legs. "You are tough. I'm afraid of you. I'll do whatever you want. Tough guy." He planted his feed on the bed and lifted his hips, groaning, then moaning as Kris swung around and straddled him. Holding Kris' hips and his own breath, Adam pushed his hips up as Kris pushed down, both of them gasping when they connected with Adam's cock deep inside of Kris. 

Immediately beginning to ride Adam in slow, deep strokes with one hand planted on Adam's thigh and the other stroking his balls, Kris bit his lip, then wondered why. He might as well make noise now and they should sound proof this room and... "Yeah, god, you're good..." Crying out loudly as Adam filled him over and over, Kris sucked in a breath and asked, "You still worried?" 

"I'll worry about it tomorrow." Adam shook his head as he focused on the sight of Kris' ass clenching and releasing and the butt dimples under his hand as they found a way to release stress. 

 

"Adam's worried about Emmaline being a celebrity kid," Kris told Lane the next morning. Or afternoon. He wasn't quite sure any more.

Lane thought, then nodded. "I understand his concern."

"Me too." Cale nodded. "Good lord, I just realized -- Emmaline could be one of those hair floppers!"

"Hair floppers?" Kris asked.

"Yeah. Like Willow Smith." Cale bent over and swung his head around. 

Lane stared at him. "You look like a dog who's been infected with distemper."

"Oh, you sweet talker!" Cale said in light tone, then turned back to Adam. "You know. Flopping her hair around like some fool. While makin' a ton of money, gotta admit. But your kids won't need to be out there, selling themselves--"

"You got that right. Selling themselves like that? Over my dead body," Kris said flatly. "She's not gonna flop her hair around or dear god, be a Kardashian."

"Or Lindsey Lohan." Adam groaned and put his face in his hands. "God, she was such a cute kid and now? My kid will not turn out like that! But how..."

"That's right, your daughter will not turn out like that," Lane agreed, reaching over to hold Adam's hand. "Because you're not going to be a parent like that, whoring your kid out. Are you?"

"Of course not! I"m not a pimp." Adam shuddered. "But even still, the paps and..."

"I'm going to give you Jen Garner's number. You should talk to her," Lane suggested, holidng out her hand for Adam's phone. While programming the number in, she added, "Her kids do appear in the pap photos occasionally -- there's really no way to entirely avoid that except for moving to..." She shuddered, "Some place like Petticoat Junction and then there would be other, far more disastrous issues to contend with. But they've had quite good luck at keeping their kids safe and out of the public eye."

Adam nodded and took his phone back. "I... thanks, Laney. I guess I was just so focused on the tour and helping Dani through the pregnancy..."

"And Brian, the pond scum who talks," Lane added, her mouth twisting. God, she hoped they'd seen the last of that leech. How Adam had found enough self control to avoid punching that wanker in his bloody nose, she did not know. 

"Yes, him too." Adam curled his hand into a fist, then forced himself to relax. "I guess I was just repressing my fears about being a dad and now..." He shook his head. "What lousy timing."

Cale shook his head. "I don't know a single one of my friends or family who didn't have some sort of a freak out after their first kid was born. Didn't anyone tell you that's normal? Because if not? Helloooooooooooo! I'll tell you. It's normal, dude. Stop fussing at yourself!"

Adam laughed. "Thanks, Cale." 

"Why don't you call your dad?" Kris suggested. "I bet he'll tell you that he was afraid before you were born and when they brought you home."

 

"Was I afraid?" Eber laughed as he sliced through the mound of pancakes and eyed the fruit and yogurt on Adam's plate with disgust. "Son, I still have fears. You never get over that. I read once that parenthood is a constant state of fear."

"Wow. Sounds like fun!" Neil said sarcastically, before sipping his coffee. "Can't imagine why I'm not rushing into fatherhood. Can't imagine why Adam's nervous. And he's going to be seen as a vanguard of social change in the family structure, so... way to be helpful."

"Yeah, Dad, you're not exactly making me feel better," Adam agreed. "Why did I ask you to breakfast before seeing the baby?"

"What I meant," Eber tried again, hearing the jittery tone in Adam's voice. Poor guy probably had barely slept. Well, get used to it, he thought, then tried again. "What I meant was that when you become a parent, you worry about their survival at first, then if they're meeting their milestones, then if they're happy. And thirty years later, I'm still worried about your happiness. But that's how you feel when you're a good parent. The fact that you are worried is a good sign. It means you're going to try your best in a conscious way, so you'll succeed."

"That's kinda what Kris said." Adam pushed the raspberries around on his plate and eyed his father's pancakes enviously. "But how do I..." 

"You fake it 'til you make it," Eber advised. He sighed and plopped a large section of pancakes on Adam's plate. "Eat it. A few carbs won't kill you." 

Adam thought and chewed, then thought some more. He could do that. He'd done it many times on stage -- sometimes you didn't find that sweet spot in performing for a little while, but you still had to please the audience. He did it often enough during promo with certain interviewers. "Kind of like on set or with promo." 

"Porno?' Eber squawked, kicking Neil under the table. "You're not doing porno, are you?"

"No, no--"

"I hope not. Because...eww... People will send twitvids to me and really, bro, there's got to be limits!" Neil groaned.

Eber nodded. "And more importantly than Neil's ever-so-delicate sensibilities is the fact that doing porno would indeed be a bad parenting move."

"No kidding," Neil agreed. "They'd hold that over you forever the way we torture Mom and Dad with pictures of them from the 1970s. And Dad's ill-fated foray into a a goatee. Which, come to think of it, you've already tried the goatee, Adam, so--" 

Adam tried again, although not too hard, since he knew his family was working hard at distracting him. "I'm not--"

Neil drawled slowly, "I know you've spent a lot of time and effort working on overcoming your body image issues, but I hardly think doing porno will facilitate--"

"I'm-- Hey, I haven't had body image issues in a long time. I did Hair in the nude!"

Eber stroked his chin as if he were in deep thought. "And talk about it all the time. A secure man doesn't have to talk about it all the time."

"I don't talk about it all the tiii _ime_!" Adam thought the squeak he put into his voice at the end of the sentence was an excellent line reading. 

"Then I guess you're secure. So why are you doing the porno again?" Eber hoped he looking appropriately confused.

"I'm not!"

"Well, why did you tell me you were? That's not a nice prank to play on the old man."

"You..." Adam ground his teeth together, then looked over at his brother, who was nearly falling out of his chair, he was laughing so hard. "You were putting me on."

"Indeed." Eber shook his head. "But it got you out of that rut of worrying, didn't it?"

"Well..."

"It did. Ad." Eber tapped Adam's hand. Adam had a natural tendency to fall down a rabbit hole of fretting and once he got into that hole, it was difficult to get him out. He'd had an especially hard time three or four years ago -- well, before he'd met Kris. Thank god. "You're not going to be perfect. I wasn't. No one is. But you have a head start because you know your own shortcomings."

"And Kris and Dani will be all over your ass if your pulls any crap," Neil offered. "And Lane. She's a freaking slave driver."

Adam nodded. "Well, that's true."

"See?" Eber agreed. "As long as your conscious of what you do, you'll be great. So how are you going to release the news?"

"Let me guess." Neil pointed to Adam's phone. "Twitter. After you get home from the hospital and can stay cocooned at that fortress you call a house."

"Just because security detained you that one time..." Adam laughed as he remembered Neil's long and inventive string of curse words. 

"I think you deliberately gave me the wrong code!" Neil accused, not for the first time. He was positive Adam had set him up for that fiasco.

"That's _outrageous_." Adam winked at his father. "But you're right, Neil. I'm going to send out a tweet after we get home. And then there's a plan for the pictures. Or there will be soon." 

 

"Jacob." Adam sighed. Loudly. Because if ever a situation called for a loud sigh it was this one. "I am... beholden to you."

"Beholden?" Kris repeated. "Is that an actual word?"

"Of course it is! Your vocabulary needs work. Pick up a book on occasion," Adam sniffed.

"I read. Books from, you know, _this_ century." Kris winked at Danielle.

Jacob sighed. More loudly than Adam. Because someone, somewhere, sometime, had to be louder than Adam. "Adam. Kris. Lane. Danielle. Danielle's mom." He paused and looked around. "May I ask why I am in a delivery room?"

"Actually, it's not a delivery room. Once the mother delivers, she is moved to a recovery room. This is, therefore..." Adam held up his index finger. "A recovery room."

"Fanfuckingtastic, Mr. Pedantic."

"Language!" Kris cried out, shaking his finger. "There are ladies present."

"Speak for yourself, Kris." Elaine grinned as Lane and Dani laughed and then went back to speaking nonsense to her granddaughter. 

"For the love of..." Jacob huffed. "Okay, whatever. What do you want from me -- and Adam, don't sing--"

"I wasn't. Honestly. That would have been _sooooo_ obvious."

"And we all know Adam never wants to be obvious," Danielle said with a smirk. 

"Actually, no. He's remarkably obtuse." Jacob smirked back, glancing at Kris, then back to Adam again. "So why am I in Danielle's recovery room?"

"Because we needed to talk to you asap and it seems highly unlikely anyone would overhear us in this room," Lane explained as she scrolled through Adam's Twitter feed, checking to see if any of the fan ninjas knew what was going on. She put nothing past them. 

Adam nodded. "See? That makes total sense."

"And it's not your way of making me incredibly uncomfortable so I'll agree to something stupid just to get out of here."

Adam twirled an imaginary mustache. "My evil plot? Foiled! I tell you, foiled!"

"I'm not so into the foil anyway," Kris interjected. "Now, Saran Wrap? That I might be able to get behind." 

"I get your behind." Adam leered, still twirling his imaginary mustache.   
Jacob counted to ten. "Why. Am. I. Here?"

Adam clapped Jacob on the back. Perhaps strictly harder than necessary, but whatever. "First things first. As I was saying when I was so rudely interrupted, we are beholden to you for distracting the paps and tabloids a few weeks ago to avoid having the media poking around while--"

Dani interrupted. "While I was as big as a whale and as ornery as a badger?"  
"I did not say that!" Adam protested.

"Me neither!" Kris shuddered.

Elaine patted Jacob's hand. Poor boy looked like he might have an aneurysm any minute. "Excuse them. They a little over-excited and haven't had much sleep."

"They're always like this!" Jacob glared at all of them. "What. Did. You. Want. From. Me?"

"Oh. That's right. I did have a reason." Adam shrugged and did his best to look innocent. And ignore Dani's giggles and Kris' eager grin. One day, he was going to see a Jacob that wasn't uptight. If he kept poking at him. 

"Stop it. You're neither that innocent nor that stupid. You have a plan you want me to execute. Right?" Jacob asked, pointing at Adam and staring at Lane.

"I really need to get myself a new pr person who doesn't know me so well." Adam sighed. Deeply. "Okay, Jake--"

"It's. Jacob." Repressing a strong desire to smack Adam upside his smirking head, Jacob suddenly remembered Geoffrey telling him on several occasions that Adam's teasing was his way of showing affection and that Adam preferred to be friendly with the people he worked with. He shrugged. He didn't quite get the need, but this many years into it, he should probably just admit that when it came to Adam, Geoffrey did know best. And avoid making bets with Geoffrey. 

"Sure. Jacob. Lane pointed out that it's not going to take long for some enterprising tabloid intern at TMZ to dig up the birth certificate and ascertain that I'm the father. So we need to beat the media to the punch."

"Of course. Which magazine do you want to sell the pictures to? People?" Jacob grinned suddenly. "I hope it's People because I already started negotiating with them for a cover and for Lee to take the photos. We'd have a cover with the three of you and the baby and if you all approve, some pics inside with all the grandparents and the nursery."

"Oh." Adam blinked in surprise. Sometimes he was so busy annoying Jacob that he forgot Jacob was a damn good pr guy. D'uh. "Well, thanks. People's the way to go, right?"

Jacob nodded. "They're the most respectable gossip magazine. And People hasn't done a cover with a gay couple and their baby."

Lane nodded. "Yes, that's true. They lost the Elton John Cover to Us Weekly, so they're no doubt quite eager to get an au courant pop star. And Us ended up with quite a bit of free promo due to that controversy stirred up by your fellow HogCallers in Gopher Flats, Kris."

"It's Razorbacks," Kris explained for the millionth time. "Controversy? Oh, I remember. A store in Arkansas banned the Us cover with Elton John, his husband and their baby. I think my brother might have gone on about it a bit, agreeing with the store, of course." 

"That's right." Jacob smiled even more broadly. "So we can get more pr if your lovely home state does it again and even more pr if it's People they do it too." 

"So you're saying bigotry has its uses?" Kris asked. "Well, glad it's good for something. Let's just hope it's not my father or brother out there leading the charge to hide my cover." When Jacob opened his mouth, Kris shook his head. "Wait. Let me guess, that'd be good pr too?"

"Totally. If your father and brother reject you, they're rejecting a cute little baby." Jacob shrugged. "Do you think your father will still refuse to acknowledge you now that there's a baby in the picture?"

"I can't imagine him changing his mind," Kris said tightly. "I'd really rather we not even ask him."

"Are you sure?" Jacob pressed. "If the writer gets quotes from him, we then have the opportunity to control the message, which is better than--"

"I don't want to." Kris shook his head and leaned into the warm touch of Adam's hand on his back. "I don't want any of his nasty attitude in the article about our baby. I just... No."

"Okay." Jacob hesitated, then patted Kris' hand because it seemed like he should or something when a guy was trying to hold in his anxiety the way Kris was. Boy really should've grown a thicker skin by now. He made a mental note to prep Kris later for the eventual fall out he was probably going to get. For now, back on task. "Okay, so your father and brother say something stupid. In terms of pr, that's not the worst result. That makes them look like boneheads and you three look like aggrieved but loving parents, confused as to why anyone would attack you."

"Who uses the word boneheads any more?" Dani asked Adam.

"I do." Kris shrugged.

Jacob groaned. "Oh dear god, I've spent too much time around you all. Next thing, I'll be wearing plaid. Adam, be a good guy and promise me you'll stage an intervention if that happens?" Jacob asked.

Adam burst out laughing. Who knew Jacob could tease? "I promise. Pinky swear?"

"If necessary." Jacob held out his hand and grinned when Adam crooked his pinky finger through his. 

"Here's the thing..." Adam began.

Jacob groaned. "Okay, what is it?"

"I would rather our story be part of a longer piece on non-traditional families. I was reading that the idea of the so-called traditional family is not a reality of the majority of households in the US any more, but people, especially politicians, ignore that reality.

"Good god, you sound like your brother," Kris observed.

"That's quite scary." Lane shuddered. She was still not a Neil fan. Too much water under that bridge. 

"Oh, Neil's not so bad these days," Adam defended, then turned toward the baby as she let out a small cry before yawning and going back to sleep. 

"Program? Let's keep with it?" Jacob prompted. Turning to the person most likely to not be besotted with the baby, he asked, "Lane. Keep going." 

Lane explained, "We were thinking we could use this story not only to control the presentation of the baby and the information to the media, but also place it in context."

"Normalize it?" Jacob tapped his fingers on his knee. "You know, that's actually a great idea. You get the cover of People -- great pr. You get the cover of People with a cute little baby -- who doesn't love babies --"

"You?" Lane retorted.

"I don't not love babies. I just don't get the fascination." Jacob shrugged. "They're way more interesting when they start to talk. Like my niece--"

"You have a niece?" Adam asked in surprise. What else didn't he know about Jacob? "Why didn't I know this?"

"Because unlike modern celebrities, my personal life isn't part of my professional life?" Jacob arched an eyebrow. "So, let's move on. You with a baby on People is even better pr than you alone."

"Because it makes me look _normal_ ," Adam surmised in a snide tone of voice.

"Yeah, define normal, Lambert. Isn't that your point? Asking what's normal? It's being re-defined de facto, but people and the laws aren't really acknowledging it. So your story will work in context. Your baby's family consists of three parents, only one of whom contributed DNA -- speaking of which, are you going to address from the beginning that you're not the biological father? I'd advise it because it would remove any power Brian has if you keep a secret."

Adam nodded. Jacob was giving good advice. Maybe he should listen more often. "Totally, you're totally right. Secrets have too much negative energy and power. Dani and I agree that we'll mention that another man was the sperm donor, but I'm the father."

"Good." Jacob nodded at both Dani and Adam. "Moving on. You donate your fee to a charity of your choice -- good pr. Your story is placed in context, thereby helping to negate any criticism of using your personal life for professional gain." Jacob nodded. "Excellent strategy.

Adam smirked, mostly because he knew it annoyed Jacob. "It's amazing what I can come up with with no sleep and plenty of coffee." 

"Yeah, since Kris came into your life," Jacob pointed out. When Adam gave him a dirty look, Jacob pointed at him. "Don't raise that skeptical eyebrow to me, you dolt. Before Kris came into your life, it was a pr disaster. It was a good thing you didn't pay me by the hour or you'd still be in debt to my agency. At least when Kris came along, you weren't out there getting drunk and sleeping with guys with cameras." Jacob grinned as Adam stuck his tongue out at him. " Honestly, I feel like I should put Kris on the payroll. Or just make a large gift to the charity of his choice."

"What?" Kris squeaked. Damn it, he knew he squeaked and was he a man or a mouse or ... "Adam, I'm not-- Adam takes care of himself, I'm not responsible--"

"Chill." Dani kicked at Kris' hip where he was sitting on the edge of her bed. At the time, they had all just lived through the mess, struggling to help Adam keep his head above water, but now, looking back, Adam had really been a bigger fuck-up than they'd realized at the time. "Adam can take hearing the truth. He was a damn mess, emotionally and pr-wise until he bought the boy a muffin--"

"Coffee," Kris corrected automatically.

"Actually, I bought you both. Get the story right!" Adam teased, forcing down the irritation he had felt at Jacob's comments. Kris had undoubtedly seen that irritation because the boy could read him like a book. But... Dani -- who was exaggerating, of course -- had a point. And so did Lane's arched eyebrow that said she agreed with Dani and Jacob. Oh hell. Jacob had been right three years ago. Four years ago. He hated to admit it and... maybe that was why he'd hated Jacob years ago. For pointing out the truth. Okay, that was sobering. He probably owed Jacob an apology. Or two. "I'm sorry, Jacob. I'll find a way to make it up to you."

"Don't bother. Just don't have any more dick pics appear and I'll be good." Jacob relaxed. "Well, that and make happy music, which is way easier to sell and..." He shrugged. "Is evidence that you are actually happy, which is also good." 

Kris contemplated Adam and Jacob. Jacob actually really did like and care about Adam. Who knew? "You know, Jacob. I just figured out something."

"That plaid is not the perfect fashion choice for every occasion?" Adam asked hopefully. "Please tell me that the halcyon moment has finally occurred and--" 

"They make plaid tuxes, you know..." Lane looked down at her nails.

"They do?" Kris asked. "Where? Who?"

Adam grabbed Lane's hand. "I'll give you a bonus if you don't tell him!"

"Laney --" Kris smiled at her. "Who is it? I think I'd like to commission a special plaid little dress for the baby. With lots of ruffles. Plaid ruffles. Maybe a red and blue dress with yellow and green plaid ruffles."

Lane rolled her eyes as both Jacob and Adam snorted. Dani laughed. "You overplayed your hand, Allen."

"That's okay, Kris," Elaine interjected, handing a squirming squawking baby to Kris. He immediately began cuddling her and almost as immediately, the baby quieted. "See. You have good hands."

"Well, I've always said that!" Adam agreed. He smiled and walked over to stand behind Kris, wrapping his arms around him and the baby. "Perfect hands, in fact." 

Kris looked up at Adam and smiled. What a perfect moment, holding the baby and Adam holding him and those eyes of his smiling and ---

**_FLASH!_ **

Jacob chortled as he looked at the image on his screen. Kris and Adam looked stupid in love and were holding a cute baby. What more could he want? And it was just the kind of shot that article would need. "Perfect, indeed."


	49. Going home is the deepest wish...

**Chapter 49: "In my experience, going home is the deepest wish of most refugees." -- Angelina Jolie**

 

 

"I'll bring you and Cale to LAX. Don't be ridiculous." Adam said without looking up from painting Emmaline's tiny toe nails. He blew on them to dry the polish and smiled when Emmaline giggled and wiggled her toes, then blew again. 

"I can just get a taxi." Kris took the nail polish away just as Emmaline started to grab for it. Letting a not-quite-three year old near a bottle of dark purple glitter nail polish while sitting on a hardwood floor was not a good idea. He shoved it in his pocket.

"I already said I'd do it." 

"But..." Kris leaned his head against the back of the couch, waiting for Adam to argue him out of a bad idea.

"What's the problem?" Adam put Emmaline's foot down, trailing a finger down the arch of it to hear her giggle again, then stared at Kris. "The real problem. Be honest."

"I... think I'm gonna start freaking out and I don't want you to see that. Which -- " Kris held up his hand. "I know it's ridiculous. I know you wouldn't think less of me for having a freak out. But I ... guess I need..."

"You need to show you're a man according to someone else's definition of masculinity? A definition imposed by someone who rejected you? At a place -- the airport in Los Angeles -- where he'll never even see you?"

Kris gaped. Adam knew how to see and tell the truth. Most of the time, thankfully. "Well, when you put it like that...."

"You sound irrational? Or that you value the opinion of someone who treated you like crap over your own opinion?"

"Shut ---" Kris swallowed his words as he caught sight of Emmaline's interested gaze. "Shut the door."

"That means I'm right."

"That means I want you to shut the door." Kris winced. His gramma would smack him hard. "I meant that in the nicest way..."

"There's no door." Emmaline pointed to the doorway of the living room. "Don't get it, Dadum."

"Neither do I!" Adam agreed.

"Uncakiss bein' silly 'gain?" Emmaline asked.

"You bet." Adam laughed as Kris flushed with annoyance. "Okay, hedgehog. Explain to me again why you want to visit Conway?"

"Hedgehog!" Emmaline giggled and got up to throw herself on Kris' lap. Reaching up, she rubbed her hands across his hair, trying to push it up into spikes. "Like 'San's. But bigger."

"Not by much..." Adam corrected. Emmaline loved Alisan's little hedgehog pet, no doubt because it reminded her of Kris. 

"Why don't you go play with _his_ hair?" Kris suggested, pointing at Adam. "He's got so much more hair than I do. With a _pretty_ purple spot. Isn't his hair more _fun_? You can play hair stylist!"

"Pretty!" Emmaline nodded, crawled off of Kris' lap and raced over to Adam. Pressing against his back, she dug her hands into his hair.

Adam glared at Kris. He was so going to pay for that. "While Emmaline is playing hair stylist, how about you explain to me again why you're going back? How many times have you told me he's toxic? Toxic!"

"Toxic?" Emmaline paused, then asked, "Wike Britney's song?"

"Something like that," Adam agreed. Emmaline was at an age when she was trying to make comparisons and find connections or distinctions between everything.

"Sing!" Emmaline nudged Adam and pointed at Kris. "Sing!"

"We don't sing on command, baby girl," Adam reminded her. "What's the magic word?"

"Pwease." Emmaline sidled around Adam's back to smile up at Adam, then turned to Kris and smiled at him. One of them usually gave her what she wanted.

Adam stood up. "You know, Emmaline, I do believe I _will_ sing Toxic. I think UncaKiss needs to listen to this song."

"And I guess I should sing, Papa, Don't Preach! Honestly, for the love of hush _puppies_..." Kris muttered, hoping that would redirect the moment away from Adam singing Toxic to prove one of his damn points. 

"Puppy?" Emmaline shrieked and began jumping up and down, tugging on Adam's jeans. "Puppy! I wants a puppy!"

"No kidding." Adam glared at Kris. Every time Emmaline saw a puppy, she told them -- at great length -- about her desire for a puppy. 

"Here we go..." Kris sighed with satisfaction, looking carefully at Emmaline and avoiding Adam's eyes. He was going to be in so much trouble later. So much. 

"Oh low blow, hedgehog." Adam shook his head and picked Emmaline up, tucking her under her arm in what his mom called the 'football' hold. For some reason, Emmaline thought that position was hysterically funny and she immediately forgot about the puppy they weren't getting and began giggling happily. He began swinging her around while willing Kris to look at him.

Hell. Kris peeked up at Adam who, damn him, was capable of multitasking because he had successfully distracted Emmaline from begging for a puppy by swinging her while pinning Kris in place with a world-class stare. "What?"

"What what?" Adam pointed with his chin at Kris. "I'm still waiting to hear why you want to go back there. You even said it's not home any more."

"Aside from the fact that I want reconciliation with my father? Well, I doubt you remember but I think I told you that the Bible says we should not be quick to anger."

"Of course, I remember."

"You do?"

"I remember everything you've ever said." Adam nodded at Kris to continue, even as he wondered why Kris was talking about being slow to anger when his parents had thrown him out, what was it? Seven years ago? Define slow, damn it. 

"That's a little... scary." 

"Whatever. So, tell me. Slow to anger and...." Adam raised an eyebrow.

"Well, you're the one with the quick temper, so--"

"I'll take the warning under advisement. But this isn't about me, it's about this crazy idea you've had ever since your mother suggested that if your father saw you in person, he might get over himself."

"Generally, I think that's a good idea. Getting over yourself." Kris tried a smile, but Adam wasn't buying. Uh-oh. "Well. But the Bible also says that we need to confront those who have sinned against us. And... I do feel that he sinned against me." He sighed. "He probably felt the same way, but I have to say my piece, you know? I feel like I've still got, well, work to to do there."

"I get that. I just want.."

"I don't think it's going to be the Prodigal Son story. I don't. I'm prepared."

"That's a good plan. I just..." Adam paused as Emmaline squirmed impatiently, wanting attention. He picked her up and threw her over his shoulder than wound her up and around his body while she giggled some more. "What a monkey girl!"

"You're my twee!" Emmaline laughed as she dug her toes into the waistband of Adam's jeans and crawled up his chest, throwing herself over his shoulder, relying upon him to catch her. 

Closing his eyes as Adam caught Emmaline just as she flew backwards, Kris shook bit his lip. One day, he was gonna have a heart attack with the way she did that. He was supposed to be the easy-going parent, but even still. "You don't want me to get my hopes up." 

"I want you to be realistic. I think that's key, I really do," Adam warned. "You can't control how your father or anyone else behaves."

"I know. We're dads, I think we've learned all about how little control you have over other people's personalities!" Kris pointed as Emmaline once again tossed herself off of Adam's shoulder. Girl was a damn stuntwoman in a tiny body. And she was gonna kill him. 

"Right. So you can only control how _you_ present yourself, what you say. So focus on what you can control."

Kris nodded slowly. That was good advice. And it was probably his turn to listen to Adam. He needed to accrue the listening points given how he was planning on making Adam listen to him soon about his crazy workload. 

When Kris said nothing more, Adam suggested quietly, "You don't have to go, you know. You belong here, not there. Isn't that what you said?"

Smiling, Kris got up and walked toward Adam, gently pulling Emmaline from his grasp and holding her up in the air and pretending she was an airplane. Much safer than the damn monkey-tree game. "Yeah. I know. But I need to do this. I need... Last time, I let them push me around, push me out. This time, it's my turn to say my piece. If they accept me, that will be awesome. If they don't, at least I'm not left with the 'What if' regrets, right?" 

Giving in because he wasn't stupid enough to keep banging his head against the brick wall of Kris' stubborn streak, Adam offered, "If you want me to go with you, I'll cancel everything."

"I know you will. You have said so a gazillion times before." Kris shook his head. "But I'm a big boy--"

"That's debatable." Adam smiled. "Emmaline, is UncaKris a big boy?"

"Bigger than Riff, but he's wittle next to you." Emmaline laughed at the funny look UncaKiss gave Dadum, like Dadum was in trouble. "Is Dadum gonna have to sit on noddy stool?"

"You...." Kris glared at Adam, who was grinning, knowing Kris wouldn't fling the words he wanted to fling in front of Emmaline. And remembering the other naughty uses of that stool before Emmaline had reached the terrible twos and it became a naughty stool for time outs. The other naughty stool was now in their bedroom. "I'm a grown up and I can handle seeing my father."

"Toxic?" Emmaline repeated. "Uncakiss's father is toxic?" 

"Grrrrreat." Kris grimaced and set Emmaline down on the floor. Rubbing the back of his neck, he muttered,"Adammmm...."

"Adammmmm...." Emmaline imitated with a giggle in a lower voice, rubbing the back of her neck. Changing her voice again, she tapped her fingers on her hips, then said, "Hedgehog..."

"Dear god..." Adam stared at his daughter. What a mimic. They were going to have to be more careful of what they said around her. "Kris.... I know you have to do what you have to do. But if you want to leave early, don't hesitate to use your credit card to book a flight, okay?"

"You don't want me to go, do you?" Kris asked.

"I... Well, I'll miss you."

"That's not what I mean and you know it."

"Okay, fine. I'm worried about this trip. I know you have to do it, but I'm afraid you're going to get hurt and I'd do anything to keep you from being hurt," Adam said softly. 

"Overprotective..." Kris smiled as he wrapped his arms around Adam and stood on tiptoe to kiss him.

"No!" Emmaline shrieked as she jumped up and tried to insert herself in between the two men. "Hugs and kisses for _me_!"

"Now, Emmaline. There are enough kisses to go around," Kris warned, giving her a stern look. "Take your turn." 

"Humph." Emmaline pouted when the two men ignored her. They talked too much. 

"Just as an FYI, I cleared my calendar for the day you get back and the day after." 

"Why?" Kris looked down as Emmaline stood up hugged his leg. Those big blue eyes were almost irresistible. 

"Uncakiss!"

Tapping Emmaline on the nose, Kris reminded her, "Do we interrupt adults when they are talking or do we wait our turn?"

"I wait." Emmaline sighed loudly and sat down on Kris' foot. "For a looooooong time. Loooooong." 

Adam hid his smile and continued, "Why did I make time? Because you're going to come back in full-on hedgehog mode and I'll need some time to smooth your uh quills back down." 

Kris smiled and automatically redid Emmaline's dark blonde ponytail, before patting her on her butt and directing her back to her pile of books. "So. You're going to bring me to the airport? That'll work out with your schedule?"

"Absolutely. I said we'd bring Alisan's hedgehog over here and start pet-sitting that day, remember?"

Kris nodded. "That's right. She's going on tour. I guess I forgot with all of this..." He gestured with his hands. "Stuff."

"Yeah. Stuff." Adam counted to ten to keep from continuing to argue about why this visit to Conway was a bad idea. Be supportive, Adam. Even if it's stupid. So fucking stupid. He forced a smile. "I can bring you to LAX and then go get Harold all in one trip. It'll save time in traffic."

Giving up because he knew when he'd met an irresistible force and glad Adam hadn't insisted upon coming with him to Conway, Kris changed the subject, "I can't believe she named her new hedgehog, Harold. What kind of name is that?"

"She _was_ going to name him Kris."

"Very funny." 

 

 

"You're making me nervous..." Lane warned Adam as he paced back and forth, while looking at the clock. She knew he was anticipating when Cale and Kris would get into Conway. She and Dani shared a glance. "Or more nervous than I already was." 

"Good. Then we can share our worries." Adam looked over at Lane. She had gone to Conway a couple of times with Cale for holidays and even though she liked Cale's family, she always acted as though she'd been released from the seventh circle of hell when she returned. Familiarity had only bred more contempt in her case and Lane was the most clear-eyed person he knew. 

Dani knew it even before she said, "You're worried about his father."

"Totally. And about any casual interactions in that town." Adam shuddered, reminding himself that even in Arkansas, gay guys weren't tarred and feathered. Or lynched. 

"You used to have more faith in people," Dani observed softly. "Before... everything." 

Freezing, Adam looked out the window, seeing not the sight of his mother playing with Emmaline in the pool, but darker vignettes. "Life has taught me to be more realistic," he said finally. "I give people basic faith until they prove otherwise or... I guess I have real faith in people who have proven they deserve it. I don't give it away any more."

Dani opened her mouth to argue, then snapped it closed when Adam looked at her. She knew what that look meant. "I can't really argue with you. Between what's happened to you and me -- life, I guess. Life happened. Everyone has shit happen to them. We've both gotten more careful, less _automatically_ trusting."

"And of course, I was born that way," Lane noted. "But Kris... he's the hopeful one amongst us, even after what his parents did to him. Are you afraid he'll lose that?" 

"I...I think he's more hopeful than I am, but sometimes there's this melancholy underneath, this shadow and I worry..." Adam resumed pacing. "I think that's why I didn't want him to go back. I think he's going to end up hurt and that might ruin some of his hope, you know?"

"Maybe if he does this, he can release that shadow?" Dani suggested. "Maybe if he gets closure..." 

"That's a good point, Dani," Lane agreed. "In the end, Kris can take care of himself and if not, we'll be here to help him." 

"That's right!" Dani nodded. 

Lane pointed out, "Besides, Cale will be with him."

 

"Why did I think this was a good idea?" Kris asked, feeling his stomach roil. He patted his abdomen. Maybe that double order of Chik-Fil-A hadn't been the best idea. "It's not a good idea. Damn it, Adam was right."

"And Lane. Don't forget about Lane," Cale reminded him as he drove down the two-lane road to Conway. "She was dead set against you coming here."

"If this doesn't go well, they're both gonna ride my ass forever."

"Like Adam doesn't already ride your ass?"

Kris laughed. "True. But I like the normal way Adam rides my ass."

"I'll take your word for it." Cale rolled his eyes. "Listen, you wanted to say your piece, get it over with, get closure, right?"

"Right." 

"Well, then." Cale nodded, lowered his voice to a gravelly baritone and began to sing. "If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet, you've got to pay the toll..."

"What the hell was that?"

"Ursula sang that."

"Who's Ursula?"

"Little Mermaid! Honestly, you're the one with the kid. How can you not know Ursula from Little Mermaid?"

"I know Ursula, but not all of her songs. Apparently. But the question is -- how come you do?"

"Ariel was _hot_. What a babe. And wet too."

"You've gotta be kidding." Kris stared at Cale, who shrugged. "You're not kidding. And... wait! That's right. I remember now. In middle school you guys were talking about hot chicks in the movies and y'all thought Ariel was hot."

"Let me guess. You were confused."

"So confused!" Kris laughed. "I was generally confused by the boob thing, so I could not figure out what was so hot about a seashell bra."

"I tried to get Lane to buy one at that souvenir shop when we were in Hawaii for the last tour."

"Let me guess. She said no."

"She said yes to the grass skirt." Cale winked. "And the lei. If you know what I mean."

"TMI. Speaking of which -- what were you guys thinking about Ariel, anyway? She was a mermaid, so how do you get around that tail? It's not like you could've gotten to the good parts."

"We were like twelve, thirteen. We wouldn't have known what to do with the good parts if we'd gotten to them anyway."

Kris shrugged, then smiled. "Given what I hear women say, it seems like most adult men don't know what to do with the good parts either."

"Whaaaaaaaat?" Cale shrieked. "What do you know? What do they say?"

Laughing, Kris rubbed his stomach. "It's the eternal question. What do women want?"

 

Emmaline sat down and looked into the cage. Suddenly, she began to cry. 

"What is it?" Adam plucked her up from the floor. "Baby, what is it? Are you scared of the hedgehog? You know Alisan's hedgehog. I know he's never been _here_ , but you've played with him at Aunt Alisan's before--"

"Uncakiss!" Emmaline shrieked. "You made Uncakiss little! Want big Uncakiss back!"

"Uncle Kris? Uncle Kris is in Arkansas with his mommy and daddy right now. He'll be back in three days, baby."

"No, no no!!" Emmaline pointed at the cage. "Now. Want Uncakiss back now. Not hedgehogkiss, Uncakiss kiss." 

"What's the ruckus?" Dani asked as she walked into the room with a curious look.

Adam bit his lip to keep from laughing as he picked a shrieking Emmaline up. "She thinks I turned Kris _into_ a hedgehog.""

"What -- Oh!" Dani patted Emmaline's back as she thrashed around in Adam's arms. "You went away with Kris and came back with the hedgehog this afternoon. She probably thinks you did some sort of magic. Remember your last music video?" 

"Sweetie, that's not Uncle Kris," Adam tried to explain. "It's a real hedgehog. I call Uncle Kris hedgehog, but it's just a joke. Uncle Kris is somewhere else."

"No, no. Uncakiss belongs here! You said that!" Emmaline cried again, wailing for her Uncakiss. 

 

"Hey." Kris smiled and leaned against the wall as he heard Adam's voice. "God, it's good to hear your voice."

"Can you Skype?" Adam asked hurriedly. Good god, Emmaline had quite the set of lungs on her. 

"Yeah. Why? Wanna make sure I haven't been beaten up?" 

"It hasn't been that bad, has it?" Adam asked immediately. "Because I can come out there and --" 

"I'm joking. It hasn't been bad," Kris said quickly, crossing his fingers, glad he hadn't turned on the Skype app on his phone yet. "Don't be so paranoid. God, what an old lady worry wart." 

"You're in Arkansas, after coming out as the boyfriend of the biggest gay in the country, Kris. _Pardon me_ for being concerned."

Kris grinned. "God, I love it when you get all snotty. It means everything's all right with the world." 

"Well, that is perverse." Adam winced as Emmaline sniffled. "Turn on your Skype already. Emmaline is dying to talk to you."

"Oh, sure. Sorry." Kris smiled as he held his phone back so the camera could capture him. "Hi, Emmaline! What's going on?"

"You're big again!" Emmaline shrieked. "I don' get it."

"What don't you get?"

"The hedgehog in the cage. How did you get from the cage to the phone?"

"Emmaline..." Kris took a breath and looked around the room. It wasn't a cage, he could go out. He could even go to his parents' house. He could. He just... wasn't. Not right now, not again, anyway. The first time had been bad enough. And he wasn't gonna tell Adam that. Not until he got home. He could fool Adam on this matter. He was a good enough actor. He was. 

 

"Your face is so funny." Kim laughed and took a picture with her phone.

"Adam's here?" Kris gaped, then frowned at his mother when she reached out and tapped his jaw shut.

"Close your mouth before you catch a fly in it." Kim rolled her eyes and slid her phone into her purse. "You cannot be surprised Adam flew out here to protect his little chick."

"I'm _not_ a little chick." Kris lowered his voice. The entire cafe was already staring at the two of them, so he wasn't going to give them actual words for the gossip mill. "I'm a grown man and I don't need protection. I resent this!" When his mother frowned, Kris repeated, "I'm not a little chick."

"Well, he's a mother hen. You gotta know protecting is how Adam shows love. It's his love language. You really should read that book again, son." Kim shrugged. "Because I was totally expecting him. In fact..." She laughed. "Leila and I had a bet going on how long it would take him to get out here. Leila lost -- she'd thought he'd be here sooner."

"You... you...." Kris spluttered.

Cale stopped in the process of sauntering up to them. Seeing the frantic look on Kris' face, Cale hurried forward and leaned down, to ask, "I...uh... guess your mom got my text? You heard that Adam's in town?"

"Yeah, how did you---" Kris froze as Cale sat down next to him. "Oh no, oh no. You did not call him. You did not."

"I didn't call him. Nope." Cale shook his head, then swiped an onion ring off of Kris' plate. "So tonight? You gonna make some greens for dinner, Miz Allen?"

"Let me guess. He called you." Kris pushed Cale away from his plate. "Get your own food, you mooch." 

"Nope, he didn't call me." Cale looked over at Kim. "I hope you're gonna put bacon in the greens--"

"I get it. You talked to Lane who--" Kris paused. "Is Lane here too?"

"Why I do believe....." Cale drawled, then laughed when Kris elbowed him hard. "I do believe it's gonna be an interesting dinner at the Allens tonight."

"Your mama's welcome too," Kim reminded Cale. "I have more than enough and maybe it's a good idea to have more rather than less."

"Yeah, 'cause mebbe my father won't be such an ass?" Kris snapped. He shook his head at his mother. "Don't even look at me like that, Mama. You were the one who suggested I come out here and so far it's not been a trip to Six Flags, ya know?" When his mother pressed her lips together, Kris did too, then turned to Cale. "So where is Lane?" 

"Lane's visiting with my mom right now." Cale laughed again. "I'll never understand how a small town mom from Conway, Arkansas and a sophisticated woman from England get along like a house on fire."

"They're united in making fun of you," Kim answered quickly, remembering earlier visits with Lane at the Mills' house. "Wait. Is Adam at your mama's house?"

"No." Cale shrugged as nonchalantly as he could. He'd given Adam the time he'd promised. "I dropped him off at your house."

"At my house?" Kim gasped. "Oh no, Neil's home."

"Ohfucknononono...." Kris groaned. "Mama, we gotta get out of here and get home and...." He paused. "You know what? Nope. We're not gonna rush. Adam walked into it. He can get himself out."

"Oooh, tough guy." Cale grinned. "I'm thinking Adam knows what he's doing."

 

"Sir, I'd like to talk to you." Adam stared at Neil Allen who was standing in the doorway to the house like a sentinel. "What should I call you?"

"Mr. Allen."

"Fine. You can call me Mr. Lambert."

"You're--" Neil gaped at the attitude and the man standing before him. Damn, he was tall. And... The little girl in his arms was...

"I"m Adam Lambert. And this little girl -- the most adorable little girl ever -- is your granddaughter Emmaline. Would you like to meet her?"


	50. You can't go home again.

**Chapter 50: "You can't go home again." -- Tom Wolfe**

The silence stretched out as Neil and Adam stared at each other, neither man willing to give an inch. Adam wasn't going to ask to be admitted and Neil wasn't going to let him in until he asked. 

"I hafta potty!" Emmaline announced, wiggling in Adam's arms. "Now!"

"Oh!" Neil stepped back and gestured inside. "Well, I guess, come in." He stopped. Kris'... lover -- all in black -- and his granddaughter -- all in pink -- were in his home? Unbelievable. He stared, looking from the tall man to the small girl. 

"If you don't mind, Mr. Allen, she's just been potty-trained and I don't think we should wait."

Emmaline whined, "Where's the potty?"

"This way." Neil led down the hall and opened a door. 

"Thanks." Adam nodded and stepped inside the small blue half-bath with Emmaline, closing the door in Neil's shocked face. He was an evil man, he thought, who enjoyed that far too much. Thankfully, he didn't believe in hell. Or hadn't until he flew into Arkansas.

"Can do it myself!" Emmaline pointed at the door. "I'm a big girl. With big girl panties. 'Member? Gamweiwa gave me _Dora_ panties. You need to go."

"Okay, okay, missy. Let me know if you need help." Adam smiled as he left the room. He froze as he nearly walked into Neil Allen standing in the hallway right where he'd left him. "Relax, if you please. We're not going to ransack your home or leave gay cooties everywhere."

"She... sounds like Kris at that age. Always wanting to do everything himself. He had a stubborn streak," Neil blurted out. "It's... been a long time since there's been a little one at home."

"Maybe because you haven't invited Kris back here." Adam crossed his arms and stared down.

Whoa. Opening shot across the bow taken by the enemy. Neil looked up and damn it, of course, the guy had to be taller than he was. He squared his shoulders. "Did Kris send you to fight his battles? _Typical_. Just what I'd expect from a gay."

"Really? And yet here I am. A gay man ready to handle conflict. What a puzzle for you," Adam snarked. "A total cognitive dissonance moment. I thought us gays were all wimps who didn't know how to fight for fear of breaking a fingernail." He held up his hand and wiggled his silver-grey painted fingernails. Too bad he hadn't had time to change it over to that purple glitter polish. Neil Allen might've stroked out. Which would be a bad thing, why? 

"Humph. And yet you're here."

" _Not_ to fight Kris' battles for him."

"No? That's what it looks like to me."

Avoiding wincing as he belatedly realized that -- oh shit -- Kris might have the same idea, Adam shook his head. "No. I'm here to decide if it's worth punching you in the nose the way I've always wanted to." Adam smiled slowly, then frowned and tapped his own temple. "And then it occurred to me that Kim might not appreciate that, so I brought Emmaline along because her presence will encourage me to control my urge to punch you." And to see if Neil Allen could resist her, because if so, the cause was lost and Kris could just leave quickly before he got any more hurt by this jerkface. 

"I suppose you want me to censor my words to Kris? Because I'm not going to. It's my home and I'll say what I want."

"Actually, no, I don't. I want you to be yourself so Kris has a realistic idea of what he's dealing with. I don't believe in sugarcoating the truth. It eventually gets very messy." 

"Dadum! I need help washing my hands. Pwease?" Emmaline called out. "There's no stool in here."

"Okay, okay." Adam opened the door, turned on the spigot and lifted Emmaline up with one arm. "There's no stool because they weren't expecting us."

"Why not? Uncakiss is here, so we be here too." Emmaline smiled at her father in the mirror as he pumped soap for her. Oooh goody, foamy soap. She slapped her hands together, giggling as the soap flew upward and dotted her father's face with foam. She kept giggling as he wiped his face and she washed her hands. 

"Excellent point. Make sure you remind Uncakiss of that when you see him."

"After I kiss him." 

"After _I_ kiss him!" Adam teased and handed Emmaline a blue hand towel. 

"Why you always first?" Emmaline pouted. 

"Because I knew him first."

Emmaline sighed loudly.

"You are a first class sigher."

"Do what you good at. Mama tells me that. I good at sighing, so I do it."

"Makes sense."

"Mama always make sense. Not like you and Uncakiss. You two silly." 

"Are we silly?" Adam smiled as he noted that she had actually said the _l_ in like and silly. His little girl was growing up. 

"Yes. Why we in here? That's silly. I saw pictures of Uncakiss out there. We should look."

"We should!" Adam agreed. He picked Emmaline up and carried her out to the hall. Turning to Neil, Adam asked, "May we look at the pictures? Emmaline is apparently fascinated by them."

"I... of course." Neil nodded, the manners his mother had long ago drilled into him rising to the surface. "Would she... like a drink? A Coke?"

"A Coke!" Emmaline clapped her hands. Coke was a special treat.

"No. Thank you." Adam shook his head.

"She can have a Coke..." Neil offered. Damn it, if he was going to have a granddaughter, he could spoil her. 

"She'll get hyper. You don't want that. Really." Adam forced a smile to his lips. Neil was trying to be a decent host and his mother would kill him if he weren't a decent guest. "Water or milk, my girl."

"Water. Pwease and thank you!" Emmaline nodded. "After the pictures. Wait--" She pointed. "Grammy Kim!"

Neil smiled. "Yes, that's your Grammy Kim with Kris at a band concert."

"And this one? Why UncaKiss dressed up like a wittle king?"

"Oh shitake mushrooms! That's the Little Mr. Little Rock picture!" Adam laughed and put Emmaline down to pull out his phone. "Blackmail material in perpetuity..." He chuckled as he took a picture. 

Emmaline looked around and then asked, "Why you have pictures of Uncakiss here?"

"Because this was Kris' home," Neil explained.

Emmaline stared at Neil for a long time, then shook her head. "No. Uncakiss is home with _us_. Where is he?" 

 

“We really should get back to home,” Kim suggested again, giving Cale a kick under the table.

“Yeah. You uh.. don’t you need to get cooking for dinner, Miz Allen?” Cale suggested.

“You can go on, Mama. I’ll just hang out here with Cale.” Kris leaned back in the booth and crossed his arms. Nope, not going anywhere. Adam could just handle himself. The domineering, bossy, aggravating...

“I...uh... should get back home. Before my mama shows Lane more of my baby pictures.” Cale nodded. “Yup, should go--”

“That’s fine. I’ll sit here. Order another Coke. Watch people go by...” Kris gestured toward the street. “Not a problem. Nosirreebob, not a problem if I just sit right here for a while.” And contemplate how I'm going to kill him. 

“Kristopher. Are you bein’ stubborn?” Kim asked.

“Yup.” Kris nodded. 

“Mebbe you oughta just go and have the fight and get it over with?” Cale shrugged when Kris glared at him. “C’mon, dude. I know you have this tendency to avoid... What? You do!” Cale defended himself against Kris’ indignant look. 

“You do,” Kim agreed.

“So now y'all are ganging up on me too?” Kris pushed himself back into the corner of the booth. "I'm real tired of people tellin' me what to do. Real tired."

“Well..." Cale held up his hands. "I’m just thinkin’ that mebbe Adam’s so pushy because you keep retreatin?”

“That sounds like somethin’ Lane would say,” Kris accused.

“You know, I do have thoughts of my own,” Cale argued. “And eyes to see. And a brain to make judgment calls. And many years of experience bein' your friend. You don’t like Adam bein’ so pushy, then push back. I’ve seen you do it -- after all, the guy calls you hedgehog, doesn’t he? So push back now.” 

 

“Well, well, if it isn’t Mr. Bossypants!” Kris smirked at Adam’s chagrined expression as he stood, shoving his hands into his pockets -- and wow, that was realllllly weird seeing Adam in what used to be his home's living rom. Well, it still was the living room, but it wasn’t home any more. He’d realized that last night when his father acted like he was Typhoid Mary. He hugged Emmaline tighter. 

“It’s Dadum.” Emmaline looked confused. She put her hand on Kris’ cheek and pushed it so that he was looking straight at Adam. “See? Dadum. Not Mr. Bossypants. Who that?”

"Sometimes I call Dadum that.” Kris smiled down at Emmaline. “Like he calls me hedgheog.”

“Oh.” Emmaline nodded. “Dadum calls me monkey girl.” 

“Exactly.”

“So...” Emmaline pointed at Adam’s jeans. “Dadum’s jeans are bossy?”

“There’s lots of bossiness going around.”

“Aunt Waney’s here?” Emmaline asked.

Kris laughed. The child made good connections. “Yes, she is. She’s coming to dinner.”

“That’s true!" Kim held her hands out for her granddaughter, smiling when the little girl launched herself into her arms. "I have a lot of cooking to do. Emmaline, would you like to come with Grammy Kim into the kitchen?”

“Is he coming too?” Emmaline snuggled into her grandmother's arms and looked at Neil curiously. He had acted all tight around Dadum, but was okay with her. He'd offered her a Coke. "Coke?"

“Yes.” Neil nodded and smiled. The little girl was adorable. And astonishingly well-behaved for being raised in Los Angeles in some unnatural set up with two perverted guys and one girl and not a marriage amongst them. Well, he couldn't blame on the child for her parents' moral failures. At least she was wearing pink, a proper girl's color. “Or we probably have a cookie for you in the kitchen.”

“Can I?” Emmaline asked Kris. 

“It’s _may_ I?”

Emmaline sighed. “May I have a cookie, Uncakiss?”

“Yes, you may. But no Coke. Milk or water.”

Kim looked at Kris. “And you and Adam may go upstairs to your old room or out back in the yard to have the discussion I believe is imminent.” 

 

**Bang!**

Kris slammed the door to his old bedroom closed and glared as Adam sat down on the twin bed and waited. 

"Well, go ahead." Adam nodded. He'd rather get the shit over with. "Yell at me." 

"I cannot _beeeeeelieve_ you came out here -- what am I saying?" Kris slapped his forehead. "I don't know why I'm surprised. I really don't. _Why_ did I think you'd let me do this on my own?"

"But--"

“I wasn’t even gone a full day. You couldn't give me a full day on my own?”

“But--” 

"You're the biggest control freak I've ever met! I mean, seriously, dude!"

"But--"

"Or is that you don't think I can handle this? I bet it is! No wonder my father doesn't think much of me. Neither do you!"

"Okay, that's unfair!" Adam snapped. "Totally unfair. I think _everything_ of you. There is no one who has a better opinion of you than me. It's really unfair of you to imply otherwise. You're just projecting your own insecurity and fear and lack of faith onto me! "

Kris gaped, then muttered, "Low blow, Lambert." 

“I’m sorry.” Adam apologized. He almost added that what he'd said was true, if hurtful, then decided he should shut his damn mouth because it was just getting him into trouble. He might be a chatterbox, but he’d like to think that every once in a while he knew when to shut up.

Tilting his head and examining Adam’s face, Kris hid a smile. Damn it, he couldn’t really stay angry at Adam for too long, although he wasn’t done yet. But right now, Adam looked like he was in physical pain and it was no doubt from keeping his lips pressed so firmly together. “You deserve it, you know.”

“What? You yelling at me?” Adam held his hands up. “Go ahead. Keep going. I’m just now realizing I screwed up.”

“Dani didn’t...” Kris shook his head. “Let me guess, she tried. So did your mom. But you and Lane fed on each other. Are you two just that bossy or do you think I can’t handle it on my own?”

"I’m not going to speak for Lane. I’m already in enough trouble with _you_. Let me... Just...Okay. Here's the deal. I know you _can_ handle this on your own. But why _should_ you if you have people who love you who are willing to help?"

"Because I want to do this on my own! I need to!"

"But why?"

"Can't you just accept... Again. What am I saying? You can't just accept anything!"

"I accepted that you wanted to come out here to deal with your father. I didn't get it. I don't really get it still.  People like that don't change, so I think it's foolish. But I accepted your choice."

"Not really. You came out here. To interfere."

"No. To _support._ "

"Pfft." Kris snorted. "Were you planning this all along? Is that why you eventually stopped arguing with me -- because you had a Plan B?"

"No. It was an impulse after the phone call last night --"

"An impulse to insert yourself into my life?" Kris scoffed. "You always do that. It's not an impulse, it's a pattern."

"That’s so unfair!” Adam shook his head. “Do I push you into quitting the bar to spend more time on your music? Do I push you to take those gigs you got offered with Cale? Did I push you to go on tour as my bassist?” When Kris opened his mouth, Adam sighed. “Okay, maybe I did push that last one. But it made sense! Geoffrey and Hannah agreed with me and they wouldn't if it didn't make sense. And you like touring with me! And lord knows I like having you on tour because c'mon, how much would it suck if you didn't? But aside from that -- when I was right and when it was about _us_ , mind you -- I don't push. That hard.”

“You really think you hold back, don’t you?” Kris realized. “You think you’re... patient and give me lots of space.”

“I do! I am.” 

"No. You. Don't!" Kris began pacing. "I cannot beeeeeelieve you and..."

As Kris paced and ranted, Adam looked down and began picking at his nail polish. He -- Oh hell, was he _too_ pushy? Was he going to push Kris away? Oh hell. He swallowed hard and when Kris finally paused for a breath, he inserted, “I try. I do. Besides! Oh and you don't tell me what you think about my choices? You don't talk to Lane about how I need to cut back on my schedule?"

"Well, okay, I do, but I don't actually interfere..." Kris trailed off as he noted Adam picking at his polish. Oh. Adam was actually really nervous. He was probably afraid Kris was going to leave him -- that old insecurity coming back. As if. Oh and... oh! That was probably one reason Adam had hurried out, he was afraid Kris might stay here. Totally irrational, but then fear was irrational. He knew it too. He sat down on the foot of the bed and saw relief flicker through Adam's eyes. 

"Well? What were you going to say?" Adam demanded. 

"God, you're in the wrong and you're still trying to be bossy! It's your default."

Adam gaped at Kris. "And this is coming as a surprise to you?"

"No, you're right about that. You have always been bossy."

"And you've _seemed_ to like it." Adam frowned and picked at his nails. Had Kris been pretending or trying to please but not really liking it? "You... I thought you like it." 

"For sex, yeah!"

"C'mon, be honest. You like my bossiness in general, don't you?" Adam pressed. "Tell me, please. I need to know." 

"Okay, I do," Kris admitted reluctantly. His father would probably think less of him for liking Adam's bossiness, but it was true. He just didn't need to tell his father about it. And maybe he needed to rethink this dynamic because it had gotten out of hand. Maybe Cale was right and Adam had gotten more pushy because Kris had gotten more and more easy going. Or maybe Adam was just so stressed he was trying to get control wherever he could. He'd have to think about it. Yup, rethink it...Starting now, because really, this incident was pushing it. "Well mostly. But sometimes... you gotta know when to _lay the fuck off_. I think... I really think you need to leave me be sometimes. Or else, Adam, damn it..."

"Oh." Adam bit his lip and picked at his polish some more, saying nothing as he thought, his mind racing furiously as he tried to solve the problem. The problem he'd caused. That might result in him being kicked out. "Moderation is not my strong suit. But I can try harder because ... maybe I pushed too far this time?"

"That's what I'm sayin'!" Kris slapped the bed. He looked down. Adam must be really distracted because he hadn't made one comment about the plaid bedspread he was sitting upon. "You did push too far. Dial it back!"

"Oh. I.. I am sorry. I screwed up. I'm sorry. My bossiness got the better of me." Adam looked up and asked tentatively, "Or maybe it was just being overprotective. That's better, right?" 

Kris stared at Adam's contrite face and looked away or he'd give in and smile when he needed to be tough. Besides Adam’s bossiness might be a benefit, long-term. He leaned way forward and poked Adam in the shoulder. "Okay. I know you meant well. But it seems to me that it's okay for you to interfere, then it should be okay for me to do the same!"

Adam opened his mouth, then nodded.  It would only be fair. It would kill him, but better than Kris killing him. Or leaving him. Plus, it was fair. He sighed and admitted, "Actually, you're right." 

"I am? Of course, I am. I'm right. So this means I've earned a Get Out of Jail Free card for one major interference in your life?"

"Yeah..." Adam sulked. He looked down. Dear gods and goddesses. He was sitting on a plaid bedspread. Could this day get any worse?

"Ha!" Kris crowed triumphantly. He already knew what he was going to do.

"What look is that?" Adam asked suspiciously.

"Forgetaboutit," Kris hurried to say. "Back to the point.  You. Here. With my father. How did it go before we got here?"

"When Emmaline was in the bathroom, he started to say shit. When she came out, he was... polite. Because of Emmaline. He kept staring at her. I think he was shocked to see the little girl that could've been his granddaughter. Who was without horns and wearing the pinkest dress in her wardrobe. I'm pretty sure I would've been standing outside when you got here otherwise." 

Kris sighed and forced his fists to uncurl. "So he kept it polite when Emmaline was around? He's probably gonna try something when she's not in the room or in hearing distance. My mother really would kick him out if he said shit in front of the granddaughter." Kris paused. When Adam nodded, Kris continued, "Here's the deal. When he says shit about me, you _will_ let me handle it. You will not interfere in any conversations with him about me."

"But--"

"But NOTHING!" Kris poked Adam again. "If you're truly here just to support me, then it will be silent support." Kris grinned at the look of horror on Adam's face. "I know it will kill you to keep your mouth shut, but that's what you're gonna do."

Adam flopped back on the bed. "I will die."

"Good. You deserve to die."

"You're awfully mean here in Arkansas. I don't think I like it here." Sitting up and reaching his hand out, Adam tickled his fingertips along Kris' thigh. "Make me like it more, please?" 

"Nope. Too fucking bad." Kris turned his back on Adam. Adam needed to suck up a little more. 

"What do you want me to do?" Adam slid his fingers up under Kris' shirt, gently rubbing little circles on the warm skin of his abdomen, relieved when Kris didn't push him away. "I could give you a really quick blowjob, if you want."

"Hmm..." Kris thought, then shook his head. "Nah. I couldn't enjoy it with our daughter and my parents downstairs. That's creepy."

"True." Adam crawled up behind Kris and began kissing his neck while talking. "We could just make out for a while. Kisses are always good and you turned your head when you came into the house and we didn't get a little hello kiss, so I think we should make up for that."

Kris hissed in a breath and moved away. He was going to give in if Adam kept kissing his neck like that. "You'd get just as much out of that as I would."

"Oh, so it's a punishment then? Given that your mother is probably making chitlins and those hideous greens..." Adam shuddered and picked at his pinky nail. Kris had moved away. Not a good sign. "I think I'm being punished enough."

"Ha!" Kris pulled his laughter back in. He wasn't going to forgive Adam this quickly. "Not even. What would..." He turned around, shoving at Adam, who obliged him by falling back on the bed, all splayed out. Oh shit. He looked totally fuckable and... down, go down, Mr. Happy. The parents were downstairs. How could he punish Adam... Who was looking ridiculously hot even in his version of being dressed down with jeans and tee-shirt... "Ha! I know. You're in Arkansas. You should wear a Razorbacks sweatshirt--"

"No way!" Adam sat up in a flash. Kris and Cale wore those ugly sweatshirts when they watched football. Hideous. An affront to eyes everywhere. "Dirty pool."

"Oh, unlike you showing up outta the blue on my parents' doorsteps when you were supposed to let me handle my relationship with them?"

"Oh." Adam started picking at his nail polish again. "I meant well..." he muttered.

"So, what could I do to get it through your head..." Kris grinned. "Plaid! With snap pockets!"

"Okay, this is cruel and unusual punishment!" Adam groaned, then smiled in relief. "Wait. We're not gonna have time to go to the fleet of the farm or whatever that store is. So, ha!"

"No problemo!" Kris laughed.

"That was a really evil laugh." Adam swallowed. Kris looked way too pleased with himself. 

"Remember how when we met you were mocking how loose my clothes were?"

"Yesss... Or rather, no. I wasn't mocking. I was... teasing." Adam stared at Kris, who was practically vibrating with glee. "You're an evil little man. I never knew it before, but you are--"

"You've never pissed me off this much before."

"Oh." Adam slumped and traced his chipped fingernails along the blue line in the plaid bedspread. He'd had guys dump him before for being too bossy. He was his own worst enemy. "Okay, do your worst."

"Well. I sometimes wore my clothes even looser back when I was here and I don't think my father threw out all my clothes on that horrible night. Soooo...." Kris jumped off the bed and hurried over to the closet. Flinging the door open, he laughed. "Ha! Here are a couple of my old plaid shirts. They just might fit and--" He stopped when he heard choked sounds coming from the direction of the bed. "What?"

"That." Adam pointed towards the back of the door. "Oh no. Oh no. Don't.. No. Just no."

"What?" Kris looked, then burst out laughing. Oh god, that felt good. He felt his stress evaporate at the look of sheer horror on Adam's face and laughed again, feeling his entire spine relax and the knot in his stomach uncurl. Damn it, that had been just what he needed. "Oh, damn, I totally forgot. I had your Rolling Stone poster on the back of my door."

"I... would've thought your father would've ripped that down..." Adam stared at the poster, wishing it would just go away. He managed to forget that Kris had once been a fan for months at a time and now this? This...real, live, in-person, full-color confirmation? He might have to die. 

"He did. After my mom and I reconciled, she felt bad and got a new one and put it up there." Kris sighed loudly. "It's not the same as the original of course."

"What difference is there?"

"Well, that original one might have had some...fingerprints on it. Or you know..."

"No, I don't and I don't want to know--"

"Stains." Kris rocked back and forth on his heels. "Because I was awfully fond of that poster. Awfully fond. You remember how I was a fan? I was a big fan." He trailed his fingertips down the open placket of poster Adam's shirt and then circled the butterfly below the waist. "A really big fan of this belt too..." 

"Stop it, please," Adam pleaded as Kris' fingers ohmigodkillme touched poster Adam's crotch. 

"Really big fan. I wish they'd made that poster into bedsheets. I could've had you under me in the bed, which would have made what I did with that poster way easier..."

"Kill me now. If there is a god out there..." Adam looked out the window. "Then prove it by killing me now."

"Yup. I used to look at that poster while..." Kris made pumping motions at his crotch and used his other hand to point at the bed Adam was sitting on. "Lying on that bed and--"

"Oh god no!" Adam jumped up and stared as Kris poked around his closet. Why oh why had he tempted the fates by asking if the day could get any worse? He was doomed.

 

"Why are you wearing plaid? _Cheap_ plaid?" Lane asked, her eyebrows raising as she took in the sight of Adam wearing some cheesy plaid shirt about five sizes too small over one of his designer tee-shirts. Talk about cognitive dissonance. "Did some unfortunate accident happen to your real clothes?"

"This is Kris' version of making me sit on the naughty stool." Adam flicked his fingers at the plastic snap on the pocket placket of the plaid shirt. Which was too small. Great. Ugly and tight. He felt fat and unfashionable for his first dinner in Kris' parents' house. Just lovely. He wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell of getting Kris into a better mood looking like this. 

"Why? What did you do?"

"You know the saying that half of life is showing up?"

"Yes."

"Well, half of the reason I'm wearing plaid is that I showed up."

"And the other half?"

"Kris Allen is an evil little man who hates me." Adam nodded in the direction of Kris, who was talking with his mother. "He's probably going to kill me and have an open casket funeral with me wearing this shirt." 

"Get a grip. He doesn't hate you." Lane rolled her eyes. Adam was being a bit overdramatic. "But how mad is he? Cale said he seemed rather peevish about our presence."

"Yeah, that's British understatement." Adam sucked his upper lip inside his lower lip.

"Adam?" Lane whispered as she looked from his mouth to his eyes and down to his nails. Oh hell, his polish was badly chipped. She hadn't seen it that chipped since the time Emmaline caught a stomach flu and was in the hospital with IVs attached to her little body. "What's the matter?"

"I thought... I thought he was going to dump me, Lane," Adam confided. "It's happened before, you know. I'm too bossy and push people away."

"No, no. You're being paranoid and leaping to conclusions," Lane said instantly, clamping her hand on Adam's arm and squeezing tightly. "Kris wouldn't dump you over this."

"It's not just this. He said I'm too bossy in general."

"But you've always been bossy. What's changed?"

"I don't know. I guess I crossed some invisible line."

Seeing the real distress in Adam's eyes as clearly as she saw Kris' constant looks towards Adam -- looks that showed affectionate annoyance and not real anger, although that might have been there too earlier -- Lane relaxed. Adam did have a history of being paranoid and a worry wart. "Listen. You are a forever couple. You two have a _life_ together. Perhaps you need to make some adjustments, but it will work out. You two just had a fight. That's all. Couples fight. Regroup. Work on it. Go on. It's okay."

"I'm in plaid. It's not okay." Adam forced himself to smile, reminding himself that he trained to be an actor and still did it on occasion. Apparently, this was one of those occasions so he could damn well smile on command. "But another truth is that tonight isn't about me or even our relationship. It's about Kris dealing with his father. So we should be focusing on ways to make this easier for him and... I did it again." He groaned. "I'm trying to help solve his problems and I'm not supposed to interfere." 

"It's going to prove rather difficult not to interfere when his father's up to what I perceive to be his usual tricks," Lane observed, watching Neil Allen closely. He had that smug look that reminded her of... Ugh. Danny Gokey. 

"And the real trick is that I'm not supposed to say anything. I had to promise I wouldn't say anything if Allen said crap to Kris."

"Are you serious?" Lane asked in shock. Adam being silent when Neil Allen tried homophobic ranting at Adam's beloved Kris? Adam would explode or chip his nails to pieces. When Adam nodded, Lane shrugged. "Well, he didn't make _me_ promise."

Starting to smile, Adam swore under his breath as he came to a realization. Now shaking his head instead, he disagreed. "No, Lane. Kris would be furious. I think we need to let Kris handle this on his own."

"Is this some bloody stupid notion about proving his masculinity?" Lane asked, watching Kris' body language as he stood glaring at his father.

 

"So what are you doing for an actual living these days?" Neil asked, making sure his wife was no where within ear shot. "Or do you get paid for just bein' _available_ for the rock star over there? In other words, how well does it pay to be a whore in Hollywood these days?" 

Adam clenched his hands, then closed his eyes. He recited the mantra under his breath, "Kris wants to do this on his own, Kris wants to do this on his own, Kris wants to do this on his own..." 

Her hand sliding onto Adam's fist, Lane burrowed her fingers inside the curl of Adam's hand and gently prised it open. She curled her hand around Adam's and held on, feeling the frustrated trembling of tight muscles under his skin and the low growl in his throat. 

Kris curled his hand into a fist, then hearing Emmaline's clear laugh ring out from the kitchen forced himself to relax. He wasn't the kid who, for all that he'd been on mission trips, had his blinkers so tight to his head from fear of seeing the truth that it was like he'd been nowhere and done nothing and known nothing outside of Arkansas. He had left with nothing. He'd seen stuff, done stuff he wished he hadn't. He'd survived. Then he'd made some hard choices and thrived. He'd traveled the world not once but twice, he'd met the man of his dreams and made a lifelong relationship, he was a better musician all the time, he was a a good music teacher, he was a decent bartender, he was a good friend, he was a good father. He deserved better than being treated like this. 

"Well. What you got to say? Or are you gonna run again?"

"Oh, I've got plenty to say. You're nothing more than a bully who likes to stir the shit, aren't you? I'm pretty sure you know I work in a bar and that I toured with Adam twice as his bassist. Plus I write songs, I sing in coffeehouses with Cale these days. I'm busy," Kris said proudly. "I get paid to be a musician more often than 90% of the people who fancy themselves to be musicians. I might not see my name in lights, but I never aspired to that. I consider myself a success--"

"Maybe out there. But here at home, you'd be considered a user. Or a loser. Because you couldn't afford to live in that fancy house without his money--"

"And you couldn't afford to live in this house without Mom's income," Kris snapped back, feeling the dampness of sweat between his shoulderblades. He'd never stood up to his father like this before. "So what's your point? Couples share resources and live better for it."

"What kind of man lives off of someone else? You should live within _your_ means."

"But you're not. You and Mom don't live in a house that you can afford only on your salary."

"But there's not this huge gap in our incomes. A man should provide."

"So you'd force Mom to live someplace horrible just to make yourself feel like the big man?, even when you're not."

"But I would be."

"But what if you weren't?"

"But I wouldn't be. And if I was, I'd find a way to earn more money or I'd drop the relationship, because no way I'd live off someone else."

"It's not living off of someone else. It's _sharing._ "" Kris stopped talking as he realized he'd heard variations on his father's song before. Out of his own mouth. When he'd protested Adam paying for meals or a trip or the house. God, had he sounded like _that_? No wonder Adam had gotten frustrated and annoyed with him. 

"It's leeching."

Ignoring his father, Kris continued, "And drop the relationship? What's wrong with you?" Kris looked over at Adam, who nodded and gave him a subtle thumbs up. He smiled, seeing the frustration in Adam's eyes, knowing it was due to wanting to protect. The overprotectiveness was annoying, but it was from love. And if he'd learned nothing else since he'd left Conway so long ago, it was that love was the key. 

Their home back in California... yeah, it was nice, that pool was amazing and their bathroom was kickass, but one thing he'd learned in that crappy little apartment of his was that when Adam was there, it had been home. He couldn't imagine not being with Adam, even if he drove him crazy sometimes. "So you'd give up the love of your life simply because she made more than you?" Kris shook his head. 'Well, I wouldn't. We'd make different choices. Doesn't mean you're right and I'm wrong. Just different. Besides, isn't that really, well, mean? To reject someone because they're more successful than you are? Isn't that punishing them?"

"A man's gotta have his pride."

"I think that's false pride, which is a sin."

"You're a fine one to talk about sin," Neil sneered.

"So are you. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. I think someone important said that. Who could it be? Oh let me guess... _Jesus_?"

"Don't throw Jesus in here!" Neil warned. "You've just been seduced by the dark side."

"Seriously? Adam is not Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars." Kris laughed. Adam was the light side of life. Although he did wield a really impressive light saber. He smirked and looked toward Adam, wishing he was standing next to him so he could whisper the joke to him. But Adam and Lane were holding up the wall, talking now to Cale's mother, Lisa while his own mother and Cale were setting the table with Emmaline's 'help'. 

Adam told himself that he was not going to say anything, he was not going to jump in to help Kris. He was not. He was going to hold onto Lane's hand, her sweaty hand because she was almost as upset as he was, almost as eager to jump into the fray as he was. Yes, he was going to exert that self-control that Kris said was a bad thing, ha, and just shut his mouth. 

Kris had a feeling his mother and Adam -- and hell, everyone but Emmaline -- were studiously ignoring Kris and Neil talking. He wished Adam were standing next to him, but he'd wanted to do it on his own. He'd gotten his wish.

"Maybe not. But there's no denying that living with him, being his... boy, has given you a very nice house, according to your mother, opportunities, travel." Neil nodded. "I mean, last month, didn't she tell me you'd flown to Italy for some festival? Who does that? You're leading a life of sloth, which is a sin too!"

"You're ridiculous and a hypocrite. We went to Italy because Adam was singing at a festival and made it into a family vacation. Just like when you went to a convention in Mobile and we all went down and went to the beach. Italy was --"

"I was in Itly!" Emmaline interjected as she raced up and hugged Kris' legs and pulled him toward the dining room table. Grammy Kim had told her to make them stopping talking and eat. "It was hot. We had gellto! Yum!"

"Gellto?" Neil asked, smiling down at the eager little girl and forgetting about fighting with his son for a minute.

"Gel _a_ to, Emmaline," Kris corrected as Emmaline tugged him. "Adam and Emmaline were big fans of gelato."

"Do you have gellto here, Grammy Kim?" Emmaline asked as they reached the table.

"No. I have ice cream in the freezer, but if you want soft serve, we can go to Dairy Queen for ice cream or Sonic..." Kim offered. "Tomorrow?"

"No gellto?" Emmaline pouted. "Dadum and me likes gellto best."

"Gelato is the best, but you and I are glad to eat what's put in front of us, Emmaline." Adam picked her up and set her down in the booster chair Lisa had brought from her house.

"I knows. Some kids don't even have hot dogs!" Emmaline told them. "We's lucky." 

"Very lucky," Kris agreed, watching Emmaline and Adam.

Neil opened his mouth to make a comment on Kris earning his luck on his back, but shut it when his wife kicked him hard. He glared at her. She glared back. He knew he was going to spend another night on the couch.

"So. You four have been all over the world touring," Lisa Mills commented as they began eating, desperate to find some neutral conversational topic before Neil kicked up a fuss again. She had heard some of Neil's commentary earlier and listened to Lane and Adam's whispered exhortations to each other to not interfere. "Which is your favorite place?" 

As the others answered, Lisa heaved a sigh of relief and smiled as Kim sent her a look of gratitude. Poor Kim. She was so excited that Emmaline was here, but undercutting her joy was her fear that her husband was so going to anger Kris and Adam that they'd leave and never return.

Pushing his food around his plate, Adam told stories of their touring, hoping all those years of theater training were paying off. He smiled automatically when Kim asked him if there was someplace he still had on his bucket list.

"Venice. I've always wanted to go during Carnivale time. The masks and costumes in that fog... One day." Adam nodded and poked his fork through the pile of greens, hoping that if he spread them out enough it would look like he'd eaten them. "Some day."

Lane teased Adam, "You should do it before you get too old to enjoy it. You'll be turning thirty-five soon, after all."

"And I'm going to make you talk to Billy Bush at length the next time I'm on Access Hollywood." Adam smiled as Lane hissed in a dismayed breath. "Yeah, so watch it."

"Maybe next year," Kris suggested. "We need to put it on the calendar and just do it." He smiled, then blinked when he saw the excitement on Adam's face flash away into the nothingness of caution. What was that about?

"If you want," Adam agreed slowly. "You don't have to come if you don't want to."

"What're you talking about? I want to go. One of our very first dates we talked about going to Venice during Carnevale? Remember -- the Getty art museum?"

"I remember." Adam nodded. "I just wasn't sure--" 

"You went to an _art_ museum on a date?" Neil gaped, then glared at Kris. "Of your own free will? I don't--"

"Yeah, Kris," Cale said quickly, hoping to forestall some idiotic diatribe from Neil. Honestly, the fool could make an issue out of anything. He just hoped this trip would put a period to Kris thinking reconciling with his father was a good idea. "What was Adam thinking? He shoulda been tryin' to romance you at a Nascar race. The smell of racing fuel in the afternoon -- I'm sure that woulda just sealed the deal."

"What'd be better? A bouquet of roses?" Neil asked.

"Why would Dadum do that, Coke Man?" Emmaline asked. "Uncakiss not into flowers. Mama and Grammy Ewaine wike flowers. Pink ones wike my dress!"

"Yes, Coke Man." Kim pointed at him with her fork. " _Do_ tell why Adam would give Kris flowers when that's not something he's interested in. I mean, it's not like he's you, giving me tickets to a hunting expo for my birthday."

Neil flushed. He was never going to live that down. "Well. Since when is Kris interested in art? When he was livin' to home, he was into sports."

"Music is an art," Kris retorted. "And newsflash: I still like sports. Cale and I watch every Razorback game and I've gone to see baseball a bunch of times with friends." He wouldn't say that his best baseball buddy worked in a drag show with Sutan. Not helpful... although it would blow his father's mind, so maybe it _would_ be helpful. "But we went to the museum on that date because Adam wanted to talk about video ideas -- which I totally wanted to do. Plus the paparazzi couldn't find us there since it's private property."

Emmaline shook her head, then yelled out, "Click click snap snap blah blah. Adam! Adam! Kris! Dani! Emmawine! Buzz buzz blah blah!"

"What is that?" Lisa asked.

Lane smiled. "I think Emmaline's imitating how paparazzi look and sound to her."

"You've been a good girl with the paparazzi," Kris told her with a smile. 

Emmaline nodded, her ponytail flying up and down, then giggled and pointed a finger at Adam. "Dadum wanted to punch camera guy once."

Adam winced and rubbed his temples. "But I didn't. Just because you want to do something, doesn't mean you always should." Life lessons through parenting once again, he realized.

"I knows. No punching." Emmaline sighed. " _Too_ bad, right?"

"You're not kidding," Adam agreed under his breath while everyone else was laughing at Emmaline's comment.

"Adam, do you have a headache?" Kim asked quietly, putting her hand on his arm. Poor boy looked like he needed a little break and she owed him big for bringing her granddaughter here. "Do you want some aspirin or Tylenol?" When Adam nodded, Kim patted him. "Well, follow me then."

Kris watched Adam excuse himself and follow his mother a little too quickly out to the blue guest bathroom. He turned to Lane and asked in an undertone, "Is he okay? Did I--"

"Don't worry about it," Lane urged instantly, knowing that Adam wouldn't want to distract Kris. "He's fine. Maybe the food was a little rich for him." Hopefully, Kris was focused enough on his own issues that he wouldn't realize Adam had eaten no more than two bites. 

"I done. I tried everything wike a good girl. Ice cream?" Emmaline asked eagerly. "Pwease and thank you?"

"I'll get you some," Neil offered.

"Thank you, Coke Man!" Emmaline clapped. 

Neil smiled and touched the little girl's blonde head. Kris and Adam and that mother had done a good job raising her. He had to admit it. Didn't understand it how it was possible. Must be the grace of God.

 

Kim opened a drawer and pulled out a bottle of Tylenol. "Oh crap, I really should have medicines up higher with the baby here. Speaking of which, I want to thank you for bringing Emmaline out here. I cannot tell you how happy I am to see her in my house," Kim whispered as she tipped the bottle over Adam's open hand. "It's like a dream come true."

Nodding as he took the two pills from Kim, Adam took the glass of water Kim held out to him. He stared at the little drawer of over the counter medicine, wondering if it had some antacid tablets in it because his stomach hurt, even though he hadn't eaten a thing. "She's enjoying it too. She _loved_ seeing the pictures of Kris on the walls."

"Uh-oh..." Kim groaned. "Kris is going to be angry that you finally saw the Little Mr. Little Rock picture, isn't he?"

"You successfully held onto that gem for years. Not your fault I showed up without warning before he could tell you to hide it." Adam smiled.

"But..."

"Don't worry, Kim." Adam put his hand on Kim's shoulder and squeezed. "He's already mad enough at me for coming out here without permission that me gettting that picture is just one more hot coal in the angry bucket." Hmm, there was an image for a song. He had a feeling he'd be writing a lot of them to process this trip. 

 

"I've been working on some songs for my cd that I think are going to be popular when Cale and I play live...." Kris began, then halted. Was it enough to impress his father? Was anything enough to impress his father? And why did he even want to? He sat thinking, then jumped when his mother came in and announced it was time for coffee in the living room.

"Wow, Emmaline, what happened to you?" Adam laughed as he re-entered the dining room behind Kim and his daughter looked up at him and smiled, her face streaked with chocolate ice cream.

"Ice cream, Dadum! Coke Man gave to me. Have some!" Emmaline waved a full spoon around and Adam laughed again as he bent forward and allowed her to feed him. "Not gellto, but good. Chockwit!"

"Let's go wash our hands and face," Adam suggested as he picked Emmaline up from her booster seat. He took a deep breath, then another as they walked down the hall. He would not punch Neil Allen in the face, he would not. He would not say a word. He would not. He also hoped no one would notice how many times he was leaving the room. 

"You quiet tonight, Dadum," Emmaline noted as Adam helped her wash her hands. "You sick?" She put her wet hand on Adam's forehead the way people did to her when they thought she was sick. "You feels okay to me."

"I'm not sick." Adam smiled and wiped his sleeve across his forehead. His plaid sleeve. He was going to have nightmares about this evening for years. Years. "Sometimes we have to be quiet to give others a chance to talk. And this is Uncle Kris's family so he should be the one talking, not me."

Frowning and watching her hands with the foamy soap -- she loved the foamy soap -- Emmaline shook her head. "This not Uncakiss' famiwy. _We_ are. Grammy Kim..."

"Is Kris' mom. You know that."

"But..." Emmaline giggled as the bubbles tickled her palms. "But not Coke Man. He not famiwy."

"He's Kris' father."

"No." Emmaline shook her head hard enough that her ponytail swished back and forth, tickling Adam's nose as he held her up over the sink. "No, Coke Man not his daddy. He no kiss and hug like Dadum and Uncakiss do. Or Papabear or Brushbrush or --"

"Okay, you've been around people who are huggers and kissers, but..." Adam smiled and reached around, urging Emmaline's incredibly soapy hands under clean water. He'd like to stay in here forever, too, but sooner or later they had to leave. 

"I think Brushbrush is Uncakiss' daddy." Emmaline nodded. Yes, Brushbrush who went with Auntie Theresa -- who always brought presents, yeah! -- he had to be Uncakiss' daddy. 

"No, he's not his father. He's _like_ his father. But..." Adam trailed off, trying to figure out how to explain it, how to explain fatherhood by technicality, especially given their situation. "Actually, Geoffrey Brush is basically Kris' father back home, which is more important than--" 

"Wait. I 'member. Uncakiss father is..." Emmaline screwed up her face in thought. "Toz....Tock... I know! Toxic! He toxic, like Bwitney's song."

"Oh boy..." Adam muttered under his breath.

"Holy shit..." Neil muttered under his breath, frozen outside the bathroom door en route to his bedroom to get Kim a sweater, learning the lesson that all eavesdroppers learn. 

"Toxic... So that means he no hugs and kisses his kid?" Eammaline concluded. "But... but you love peoples, you hugs and kisses them. Like Unca _kiss_. Uncakiss is Unca _kiss_ ," Emmaline insisted. "And this isn't his home, no matter what Coke Man said."

"I hear your opinion," and agree, Adam added silently as he reached for the handtowel and dried Emmaline's hands. "Now we are going back out there. Remember, everyone gets a turn to talk." 

"But I _like_ talking."

Adam laughed. Emmaline had started talking very early and had never stopped. She even talked in her sleep. "So do other people. You have to give people turns. Like at circle time at pre-school."

"Oh! Teacher says you can share talking time like toys."

"Like that. Or when it's dinner and we all take turns talking about our day."

"How you and Uncakiss and Mama take turns telling me bedtime stories?"

 

"Where are you going to sleep?" Kim asked carefully. She'd love if if they all slept here, but Kris had been quite adamant yesterday after Neil's behavior last night, which was nothing compared to tonight, that he would not sleep under this roof. Neil himself had slept on the couch and that's where he was going to stay until he shaped up.

"In the motel. The room's big enough, so's the bed. King size." Kris looked at Adam. "Did you bring her pack 'n' play or--"

"I... um ... packed in a hurry," Adam admitted. This trip was the worst impulse of his life. Okay, not the _absolute_ worst, because there had been that night he'd picked up a guy in a club and woken up the next day to pictures of his dick on the internet. At least this disaster was private and therefore contained. "So no pack 'n' play. She can just sleep between us."

"Goody! Sleepover!" Emmaline clapped her hands together, then frowned. "Poor Mama. Poor Mama's missing the sleepover. She be wonewy without us."

"Do you want to call your mama?" Kim asked, seeing the tears start to form in Emmaline's eyes. "Let's go use my computer."

"Skype?" Emmaline jumped down from the couch and raced over to take Kim's outstretched hand. "Then I can see hedgehog not UncaKiss too."

Neil blurted out, "You two aren't really having that beautiful child sleep between you?"

When Kris said nothing and just glared at his father, Adam looked between thm in confusion. He looked over at the others, saw that Lane looked as perplexed as he did, but when he saw the disgust on Cale and Lisa's face, took in a deep breath before deciding to venture a question. "Sure. Why not?" he asked. "That way she won't fall out of bed. I don't get it."

"Oh, I do. Go ahead. Explain!" Kris rubbed his hands along his thighs and swore he could hear the sound of everyone's breath being held. Thank god everyone here was family or he'd want to die at airing dirty laundry like this. 

"Because you're..." Neil paused. Okay, he had to admit he was confused. He'd watched Kris and Adam with Emmaline and it was obvious they loved the child and if he were being honest, deep-down honest, he would never believe his son was a pervert. But still. Kris had fooled them before. They'd had no idea he was having homosexual sex. With strangers from Little Rock, the city. In some hotel. So he could be a really good actor. Because really, everyone knew these people were-- "Them. The people that--"

"Oh _hell_ no!" Adam snapped and jumped to his feet, his frustration and anger from the evening at the edge of boiling over. He looked at Kris who appeared as though someone had hit him from behind with a two by four. He held up his hands. "I'm sorry. I promised, but he's impugning _my_ honor here and I have a right to say something." 

He turned back to Neil and pointed at him, his index finger jabbing in the air perilously close to Neil's nose. "You don't know me, but I deserve the benefit of the doubt -- isn't that an obligation of your Christian love? Plus, if you really thought that, then why didn't you say anything when I've been in the bathroom with Emmaline? And as for Kris... You're the one who's sick, thinking your son, who is the most amazing man I know, who loves kids with a pure heart ... how could you _think_ , let alone say, he'd do something like that? What's _wrong_ with you that you can't recognize love when you see it? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"There's nothing wrong with me!" Neil retorted. "I'm not the pervert, having sex with men and godknowswhat --" 

"Hey." Kris slapped his hand on the coffee table and ignored how everyone but Adam jumped. He stood up too. "I'm going to give you one warning. If you say anything more implying that Adam or me are perverts with our own daughter -- or anyone else, I may not be able to restrain myself from punching you in the nose. Mama's house or not. So be very careful about your next words."

"I don't have to listen to this!" Neil argued, standing up to stare at his son. 

"Oh yes, you do. I had to listen to you, all those years ago, spewing your hatred at me. I didn't defend myself then and I always regretted it. It's my turn. Not for hatred, but for truth. So _you_ listen to _me_. For once, listen to me. If you truly believe I am a pedophile, then you have an obligation to shun me forever. If you truly believe I am _nothing more than_ a liar and an unrepentant sinner, then you can just turn your back on me forever and you know what? I 'll be good with that. Because I'm not gonna sit here and listen to your ridiculous accusations. Being gay did not warp my soul or my morals. They are the same as they ever were--"

"Well, then you're lying right now. Because if you're the same now as you were then, then you're a liar. Because you lied to us, Kristopher. You lied. I don't know you at all. You pretended to be straight when all the while you were sneaking off to have sex--"

"Because I was afraid!" Kris blurted out. "Afraid of losing my family, my home, my everything. Or what I thought was my everything. But I was wrong. And I'm not afraid any more, not of you or this place I once called home. I learned and damn it took a long time and it was dark, so dark ..." He looked over at Adam who was waiting, if not patiently, with love. "Finally, I learned the lesson that I was worth more than living like that. That what I'd been searching for was..." 

Kris paused and then smiled and began to sing, "'I want to walk as a child of light...'" He nodded. "Yes, that's it. That's what I want. Then and now. Only I didn't know it then. I thought there was nothing else but what I had. But now... That's what I _have_ now. Light. I'm not going back to the dark. I'm not. And you seem to want to live there, in the dark. So you can apologize right now for these hideous accusations or we'll walk out of this house and never return. And I mean, never." 

Neil opened his mouth, then shut it as he heard Emmaline's excited shriek as apparently her mother came on that Skype line Kim used all the time. If he drove Kris and his daughter out of here, Kim would kill him. Literally. And that little girl thought he was toxic, which was so not true. She deserved to know the truth, that he wasn't toxic, just principled. And as for Kris... Well, he had to give the boy points for standing his ground and fighting. Maybe he wasn't a total pansy, the way he'd thought. Maybe he could give him a chance to prove himself. "Okay, I... don't think you'd hurt that beautiful little girl. I... was just bein'..."

"An asshole?" Kris supplied. "Tryin' to create trouble for the hell of it, to prove you're some big man?"

"Toxic, I guess." Neil glared at Adam, who smirked back at him. He had to give the big gay guy some credit, he defended the person he thought he loved and was now cool as a cucumber. Manly, he thought, then winced slightly when his much smaller son got in his grill. 

"So what's it gonna be?" Kris demanded. "Answer me. What are your next words gonna be?"

Kris would later think that he'd been waiting his entire life for this moment and it still had shocked him to the core to finally hear words he didn't believe his father ever said. Or at least to him.

"I'm sorry," Neil said in a mumble, looking with shocked eyes at Kris.

Kris stared silently at his father. He had never actually expected to hear the words, had hoped to hear them and now that he had... it seemed almost anti-climatic. He wondered if it mattered any more. Maybe what mattered was -- 

"Excuse me," Adam said in a low tone, hoping no one heard the vibrato in his voice from holding back the scream of frustrated anger. "I'm going to go check on that phone call back home."

Maybe, Kris thought watching Adam's back leave, it was true. You couldn't go home again. Or if you could or if you were allowed -- that difference they'd tried to teach Emmaline between can and may -- maybe that wasn't important because he didn't even want to any more. Maybe he just didn't fit here any more. He shook his legs out from their tense, locked position, then followed Adam, only half noticing that Lane and Cale were on his heels, asking him soft questions he couldn't hear for the pounding in his ears. Maybe it was true. You couldn't go home again because you didn't fit any more. 

But maybe... he'd left because he didn't fit here _then_ , he didn't belong then either. Or... the truth was he hadn't left, he'd been pushed out because other people didn't feel he belonged. He'd been exiled against his will, a... kind-of refugee. 

Maybe the truth was that being exiled had been the best luck he'd ever had because leaving had set him on the road to someplace far better, some place he fit, some place warm and... some place he could call home. No, some place that truly was home. He rushed in, saw Emmaline sitting on Adam's lap as they talked to Dani, with his mother hanging over them. and hurried over, throwing his arms around them both as Cale and Lane crowded close, knowing that he was now home and it had nothing to do with location and everything to do with the people surrounding him.


	51. Roads less taken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 51: Roads less taken**

"That hill was a killer." Adam groaned, bending forward with his hands on his thighs.

"The end justifies the means." Kris grinned and tilted his head to get a better view of Adams' ass. "I dunno. I enjoyed the view." 

Slowly turning his head, Adam pulled his hat off his head and stared. Ever since that day in Conway a few weeks ago, Kris had been giving him emotional whiplash. This morning alone, Kris had once again -- and foolishly if anyone asked him, not that he would have told since that would probably be _bossy_ \-- talked to his father on the phone this morning, basically had a fit and when Adam had tried to comfort him -- and truly he'd only been in comfort mode, not I-told-you-so mode although that had been damn tempting and he really should've gotten points for resisting that temptation -- had told him to leave. Then followed him out the door, yelling for him to wait up. And now he was joking about ogling Adam's ass? He wiped his forehead and asked, "Are we... okay?"

"Sure, why..." Kris reached over and touched Adam's arm. "We're okay. Just..."

"I know. Stop being so bossy." Adam nodded, making a list in his head, wondering how much of it he'd be able to tick off. "And interfering. And being a Captain Know It All."

"Captain Know It All?" Kris laughed, wondering why Adam was staying so serious. Must be that he was just being deadpan. Sometimes he thought Adam should go on more acting jobs; the guy really could pull a face. "That's... a great song title. For you know, a kinda Barenaked Ladies type song?"

"Or a Kris Allen type song?" Adam suggested. "Why don't you write it and sing it yourself?" He bit back from explaining why because that would probably fall under the bossy category. 

Adam was probably right, damn it, Kris thought. He probably should be concentrating right now on recording the best stuff for the rest of his own cd and then think about selling songs from it to another artist. 

When Kris stayed silent, but twisted his mouth into a grimace, Adam sighed and forced himself to patience. "I didn't mean that as an order. Just a suggestion. Or actually and for the record, I asked it as a question."

 

"What was that for?" Geoffrey asked, pulling back to look down at Kris who had just hugged him. In public. Quite uncharacteristically for Kris, since he hated any kind of PDAs. 

"Thanks. Just...thanks. Although the word is hardly enough." Kris squeezed Geoffrey's arms before stepping back. He looked around the small beachfront restaurant and didn't see anyone with a camera, but you never knew. "Going back to Conway and dealing with my father really highlighted for me that...well... you've been more of a dad than he has. Or possibly ever was. So thank you."

"Oh my..." Geoffrey put his hand over his chest as they sat down. "That means a lot to me."

Seeing the honest display of emotion on Geoffrey's face, Kris swallowed hard. He had spent the weeks since returning from Conway trying to figure out how to deal with his father and his father's phone calls and probably driving everyone crazy, now that he thought about it and this morning, seeing Geoffrey's weekly text, he had an epiphany that he didn't need, let alone want the man who'd sired him to be his father. He had the one he wanted already. "I just wanted to let you know. I... uh... think you should tell people you love how you feel. I'm only sorry I didn't say it before. Seeing him again... I just realized -- again -- how lucky I was when I met you. My life..."

"It has been my pleasure. You and Adam have made such a difference in my life." Geoffrey smiled. Seeing Kris look away, over Geoffrey's shoulder towards the ocean, Geoffrey knew that Kris would grow uncomfortable if they kept talking in this manner and changed the subject. "And speaking of when we met, I have an offer for you. One that might be lucrative."

Kris smiled and shook his head. "That's okay. I'm set these days. You remember Adam, doncha?"

"You misunderstood..." Trailing off as the waiter set down a basket of assorted breads and their drinks, Geoffrey waited until he'd left. Everyone in LA had big ears and empty pockets. No need to give the greatest commodity of all -- information -- away for free. "The first time we met."

"Oh!" Kris leaned forward eagerly. "God, that was so long ago. More than five years or is it six now? So much has happened since then. I've changed so much."

Geoffrey placed his elbows on the table and steepled his fingers together, wondering. "Have you?"

"Yeah. You know, one day I was just this guy from a small town with small town ideas and fears, lots of fears, working here and there, content. Not... happy, but content."

"With the occasional foray into the big city for sex?" Geoffrey smirked. Kris was being uncharacteristic yet again with this detour down memory lane, but he supposed the trip home and the subsequent phone calls had naturally turned his mind to the past.

"Yeah. I was as content as I could be given that I was hiding, you know? And the scary thing is that I mighta gone on like that forever. Hiding. Fearful. Forever. And then in one day, one moment, really, my life changed and I thought it was over, but it wasn't." Kris smiled and gestured out towards the endless expanse of ocean behind Geoffrey's shoulder. "I... could never have imagined the path my life has taken." 

"From a Conway point of view, you went down the road less taken." 

"Ah. My father would say any road less taken, as you say, is the wrong road. As for me..." Kris smiled, remembering his Robert Frost from a long-ago English class, a poem that had stuck with him all these years. "'I took the one less traveled by and that has made all the difference' ..." 

 

"Where the hell are we?" Neil Lambert called out. He stopped, looking around as the dry but hot fall sun scorching scrubby growth gave way to the cooler green and gray darkness of trees.

Adam glanced back at his brother and then kept walking. "In the woods."

"I cannot believe..." Tramping as hard as he could, Neil Lambert glared at Adam's back. Why was he following? 

"Believe what?" Adam asked over his shoulder, holding back a branch.

"So many things." Neil sighed, then spluttered when Adam let a branch smack him in the face. "Hey! Doofus!"

"Are you talking to yourself again?"

"No. I'm talking to you. Why the hell are we out in the woods?"

"Geocaching."

"No shit, sherlock. But what I cannot believe is ... Let's start with A -- why you're being quiet. What the hell's up with that? Do you...Ohmigod, are you sick? Do you have some terminal disease and you came out here to tell me--"

"No, no!" Adam laughed. "I'm not sick. I'm fine. I'm just... thinking."

"Bro, you're an extrovert -- you think by talking. When you think without talking, you get way too deep into your own head and that? Is. Not. A. Good. Thing. So for the love of whatever gods may exist, talk. Starting again, now with -- B -- why are _we_ doing geocaching, which is your repellently-cute-and-wholesome-couple-thing with _Kris_?" 

"No one will hear us out here."

"Ohmigod, you're going to kill me!" Neil let out a small shriek and smiled with relief when Adam rolled his eyes.

"Don't tempt me."

"Okay. But I still don't get it. No one would have heard us in your house. Or your car. Or Griffith Park or--"

"I wanted... to not feel claustrophobic."

"How the hell can you feel claustrophobic in that huge house of yours?"

"I just do, okay?" Adam snapped impatiently, looking down at the GPS unit.

"Okay, okay." Neil grabbed Adam's arm and looked at the GPS device himself. "Do you actually know where we're going?"

Adam grimaced and sighed. "No, I don't. That's why I wanted to talk to you." Neil would tell him the truth.

"Me?" Neil released Adam's arm and waited curiously. He and Adam had grown much closer over the years... well, since Adam had fired him and he'd gotten his head out of his ass. But Adam had so many friends, why would he come to Neil first? "What's up?" 

"How bossy am I? Really?"

Neil gave a bark of surprised laughter. "Is this a trick question? You drag me out here to the stupid woods, ask me a trick question and then--"

"Sell you to the carnies the next time the circus came to town?" Adam laughed as they both remembered their childhood tormenting each other.

"I thought maybe you were tricking me into seeing what my superhero power was." Neil elbowed Adam. "Already know what yours is. The bossiness. Yes, you're bossy. You may, in fact, be the bossiest person I know. I don't know how Kris puts up with you...." Neil trailed off as he saw the flush instantly redden Adam's face even in the shadow of the trees. "Why the face? What's going on?"

"When we were in Arkansas, Kris yelled at me for being too bossy. He wants me to and I quote, lay the fuck off sometimes."

Neil nodded. "And so....? What's the problem? Don't blame him, by the way."

"I... The truth is, I don't know how to do that. Or if I can. Or want to. It's my nature, you know? And if I can't, then... " Adam took one of the plastic doubloons out of his pocket and rolled it between his fingers. "Maybe... he'll just get tired of it, you know? He said, 'or else'."

"Oh, please. You cannot be worried about Kris dumping you over you being bossy." Neil rolled his eyes. "You've always been bossy. It's your nature. As you said. He knew that from the beginning. And if he was deaf and blind, it's not like people couldn't have and-- wait, I know people did tell him. I remember being at some party and overhearing Geoffrey teasing Kris about being able to handle your bossiness." 

"I guess he's tired of it. People can get tired of shit, you know?"

Neil reached forward and snapped his fingers in his brother's face. 

"What was that for?" Adam pushed his brother's hand away. He'd wanted to ask Neil about it, because Neil had always complained about his bossiness, but now Neil was being what he was -- annoying.

"Snap out of it, idiot." 

"I'm not an idiot."

"You are an idiot if you think Kris would ever leave you. Holy hell, the way the guy looks at you is positively sickening." Neil grimaced. "I can practically see the hearts between the two of you when he's looking at you. It's like a real-life Perez picture. Gag." Neil pretended to put his finger down his throat.

"You're sure?"

"Adam, do I ever have any doubts about what I say?" Neil arched an eyebrow. 

"No. You're always _repellently_ smug."

"That's because I only say what I believe to be true." 

"You _believe_ it's true. Doesn't mean it is true." 

"OMG." Neil stared at Adam. He'd always thought of his big brother as having it all together and whenever he didn't, it was freaky. "It's true, that crap that Oprah and Dr. Phil spew. We all have _issues_ growing out of our childhood insecurities, don't we? You have everything and yet you're still that kid worried about fitting in."

"You're probably right."

Neil staggered and put his hand out, grabbing onto a low-hanging branch. "Wait. Didn't you feel that?"

"Feel what?"

"The earthquake. Or maybe the axis of the Earth shifting. Or... could it be?" Neil gasped and put his hand up to his mouth. "Or could it be you -- admitting that I could be right?"

"You are such a fuckhead."

" _You_ are the bossiest person I know. Seriously. My earliest memory is--"

"I know. Of me pushing you down. You've only told that story a thousand times. What you never say is that you undoubtedly deserved it."

"Because I wouldn't do what you said, most likely."

"Foolish mortal, I was the big brother and I knew better."

"And yet here you are, foolish mortal, asking my opinion." 

"Oh snap." Adam twisted his mouth as Neil laughed. 

"Yeah. So If you want my opinion..."

"Obviously I do or I wouldn't be here asking, would I? D'uh!" Adam glared at his brother. "Well? Tell me."

"I think he doesn't mind your bossiness. He minds your overprotectiveness."

"That's not what he said."

"More is said sometimes in the silences." Neil waited and when Adam raised a skeptical eyebrow, Neil shrugged. "Well, you _can_ be a little too bossy sometimes." He smiled. "C'mon, Adam. You can handle this. Haven't you told me to stuff my negativity up my ass a time or two? And told me to work on being more social and when I said I couldn't do it, you told me I damn well better?"

"Well, yeah," Adam admitted. "It's about being conscious and intentional."

"Not going to lie, it can suck working on it, being conscious and intentional. But the rewards make the effort worthwhile. Right?"

"I... don't know where to step." Adam gestured at the trail before them, the thin brown line snaking through the green underbrush. "It's like a minefield."

"In your mind."

"I dunno." Adam kicked his foot at a twig.

"I think this is where you use your powers for good instead of evil. You know, all that control and shit?" Neil shoved against his brother. 

"Kris is writing a song about me called Captain Know It All."

Neil burst out laughing. "No way."

"I swear to god, he is." 

"I'll totally play piano for him when he performs it," Neil offered. "Hey, c'mon. Like I said, use that control you have for good. Maybe... Maybe Kris is aggravated now as opposed to before because -- and this seems incredible to imagine but then again people vote Republican too -- you've gotten more bossy as time's gone on?"

"Maybe... in the beginning I worked harder at controlling my bossiness." Adam put the doubloon back in his pocket. He wasn't going to use them anyway; Neil was right, the geocaching was their couple thing. It would be wrong to use the doubloons without Kris. "Maybe over time you just get a little lazy about ameliorating qualities that aren't so desirable."

"Maybe. Maybe it's human nature to get...comfortable and take the person for granted." Neil shrugged. "Not that I know since I've never had a long-term relationship and when Mom and Dad ran into problems, they ..." Neil froze. "Oh hell. That's _it_. Or part of it."

"What's _it_?"

"You were away on that stupid cruise ship when Mom and Dad started having problems. You left and they were fine and then the next thing you know, you're getting a call that their marriage is over. No muss, no fuss. No fighting to keep together." Neil nodded as he looked carefully at Adam's face in the dappled sunlight filtering through the trees overhead. "That's why you're afraid. Because their marriage seemed great one minute and the next, it's over."

"You think so?"

"Hell, yeah. Dr. Phil says--"

"Why the actual fuck are you talking about Dr. Phil?"

"When I was unemployed, when my dear brother, when my only brother fired me..." Neil sighed loudly and did his best to appear distraught.

Crossing his arms over his chest and staring at Neil, Adam asked, "Have you thought of becoming an actor? You have definite possibilities."

"Nah. Look at the company you keep. Low-lifes, waiters, narcissists..." Neil grinned as his brother punched his arm. "As I was saying when that dear brother abused me... I watched Dr. Phil when I was home during the day and he was always yapping on about how our early experiences basically imprint us and it's unconscious."

"For good or evil?"

"Exactly. So my amateur but nonetheless abso _lute_ ly inspired analysis is that you're afraid that one day you'll get a phone call on a cruise ship and the important relationship in your life will be over. I'd bet my last dollar on it."

"Do you even have a last dollar?" Adam asked with a little smile, filing away Neil's words to think about later. Maybe... talk over with Dani. Or Kris. Yes, Kris. "When's the last time you worked?'

"Asshole." Neil laughed, relieved that Adam was joking. A quiet and anxious Adam was wrong and unnatural. "I work."

"Being an asshole doesn't pay much."

"Watchu talkin' bout, Willis? Kanye makes millions."

"Ah, true!" Adam grinned. "Then there is hope for you."

"Speaking of hope... so I know Kris was hoping that this trip was going to go, if not well, better than the last time he saw his father. Did it?"

"I'd say it went better in that Kris threatened to voluntarily leave and never return--"

"As opposed to being kicked out? That's better -- at least he's in control of the situation then."

"You got it. However, on both occasions, his father basically accused him of being a pedophile, but this time I got the mud flung at me too. Because you know -- being gay means you're also a pedo--"

"He said WHAT?" Neil yelled, his voice echoing around the woods.

_flapflapfalp_

Birds squawked and flew away as Neil's voice reverberated through the canopy of leaves.

"You heard me."

"Whattheactualfuckdidyoupunchhiminthenosebecauseifnotletsgetonaplanerightnowandillholdhimdownand--" Neil stopped to heave in a breath. He really needed to give up smoking in order to rant properly. "Well, did you?"

"No! Emmaline was in the next room and I promised Kris..."

"Son of a bitch!" Neil yelled again and began pacing along the narrow trail. "Did Kris punch his father?"

"No." Adam clenched his jaw and felt his nails dig into his palms. Huh. He held open his hand and examined the half-moon shaped gouges in his skin. "Guess I'm still mad about his father. I thought I was zen." 

"Adam, you're about as zen as I am. Which is to say, not at all. Screw this. We're going to my gym."

"Why?"

"If you want my opinion and --" Neil stopped pacing to stare at his brother. "You did. You actually did want my opinion."

"We've had our differences. But in the end, you _know_ me. You knew me when. You give me grief but..."

"I have your back. I'm your brother." Neil smiled and put his hand on Adam's shoulder. "I'm... glad you gave me grief and shook me up all those years ago. I wouldn't be where I am today if you hadn't. So it's my turn to shake you up. Here's what I think. Maybe the problem isn't that you need to be more controlled, but that you've been too controlled, Ad. You need to punch something and I'd offer, but you might actually hurt me. That's what punching bags are for. Let's go."

 

"I'll talk it over with Adam, but I already think I know what I'm gonna do..." Kris said after a long moment of silence while he considered what Geoffrey had offered him. "Speaking of Adam..."

"Oh yes. His latest songs..."

"What songs?" Kris asked, his head snapping up. "I haven't heard any songs."

"Oh?I thought that was why you wanted to meet today."

"No, it was to ..." Kris made a rolling gesture to the side of the table. "Thank you for everything. But what're you talkin' about? What's the problem?" He wrinkled his nose in confusion. "Do they suck? Because that seems unlikely. And anyway, I'm not his music director."

"They don't suck. And I'm discussing them with you because you're his partner. They're..." Geoffrey smoothed his napkin out. "Let's put it this way. Jacob won't want an album full of these songs."

"Because..." Kris prompted.

"Remember when you first met Adam and Jacob didn't like Adam's music?"

"Yeah. Because it had too much sadness or anger in it and..." Kris froze. "What? Why?"

"You tell me. You're his partner."

"Who hasn't heard his new music that's apparently full of sadness or anger."

"Or perhaps...confusion."

"Confusion," Kris repeated. "Over what? Whether or not to have another kid? Because Dani and I have been talking about that and Adam's been reluctant."

"Another kid?" Geoffrey paused in mid-motion, his glass half-way to his mouth. He shook his head, took a drink, then set it down. "That boy needs a vacation."

"I know, right? Maybe if he takes a break, he'll come back rejuvenated and his songs will reflect that."

"Indeed." Dabbing at his mouth, Geoffrey looked at Kris. "Now. When are you going to--" 

"Adam's not going to like that you were a tattletale about his music."

"Eh, it was a mistake. Plus his entire circle of people don't know how to keep their mouth shut or their fingers out of the pudding. He'll get over it. And undoubtedly thank me for it later." Geoffrey shrugged. Adam would forgive him because Adam was just as much a meddler as he was. It was easy to forgive when you understood the intention. 

Kris shook his head. "You are an interfering old biddy, you know that?"

"You've known I'm a busybody since what -- the second time we met?"

"Something like that," Kris agreed. "The point being that I shouldn't be surprised?"

"People tend to behave according to their patterns." Geoffrey smiled automatically as the waiter came over and placed their entrees down. After he left, Geoffrey turned back to Kris and asked, "Are you going to tell Adam? Sooner rather than later--"

"I know, I know. That's like your freaking mantra or something."

"Mantra?" Geoffrey raised an eyebrow. "How very Californian of you."

Kris smiled and pointed his breadstick at Geoffrey. "You know what? I am a Californian now."

"Dear god. Don't tell me that you have an appointment for a seaweed wrap this afternoon!" Geoffrey teased. He and Kris shared an amused disdain for the Californian tendency to leap on ridiculous trends.

"Well, better than a high colonic!" Kris looked at Geoffrey and they both shuddered, then burst into laughter. "Do you remember that time Brad tried to convince us all that we needed to go to some hut in the desert--"

"Hut? I thought it was a yurt?"

"Do you know the difference?"

"Not bloody likely." Geoffrey grimaced. "All I remember is that the idea involved us being beaten with hot sticks or some such rubbish."

Laughing, Kris nodded. "That's right. I was totally freaked out. Why hurt yourself?"

 

"Feel better?" Neil asked as he unlaced the boxing gloves on his brother's hands. 

"Actually, I do!" Smiling tiredly, Adam wiggled his fingers as they slid free of the gloves. 

"Great. Once you take a shower, we can move onto part three of the Lambert brothers trip."

Unrolling the tape from his hand, Adam shook his head. Kris and Dani -- well, no one -- would believe he'd hit a punching bag. "Part three? What's left?"

 

"Hey, Kris, where's Dusty? Haven't seen him in a while," Ron, one of the regulars, noted. "Is he on tour again?"

"No, tonight he..." Kris frowned as he realized he didn't know where Adam was. Adam had said that he'd give Kris space to work on the fallout from what had happened in Arkansas. But he was realizing that there was space and then there was a black hole. "I... uh... dunno."

John winked at Ron and asked, "He's too good for us now that he's up for a VMA?" 

"No, no..." Kris hastened to say. "Have you seen his hat? He's sooooo not too good for us."

"Don't get your panties in a twist," John urged. "We're just teasing. We all know Adam's a regular guy under all that sparkle." 

"Oh." Kris nodded and looked at a glass, before stacking it with the others. "Guess he's just been busy..."

John nodded as the guys at the pool table called for another round of beers. "Working on some new music?" he asked. "Or a new video? I like the one where he was a werewolf."

"That was freaking weird! I know the guy and he freaked me out." Ron shivered. "How'd he make his eyes yellow?"

"Contacts," Kris answered automatically. "He wore them for Halloween too... Have to say, I wasn't a fan either. He was like a totally different person, which I guess is the point of a costume, but... too weird for me." Now that he thought about it, Adam had been acting weird ever since they got back from Conway. Then again, Adam had been acting weird _in_ Conway, which... okay, he could understand it. He'd felt weird himself there. A round peg in a square hole or something. Something... tight and awkward and uncomfortable with sharp edges. _Angly_ like Adam had said.

 

_"Are you okay?" Adam asked softly, looking at Kris as he drove the rental car back to the motel. His jaw was set and his hands were tense on the steering wheel and he was breathing hard. Beginning to reach out, Adam hesitated, wondering if a touch was welcome or not. Finally deciding to go with his instincts, he placed a hand on Kris' thigh and gently stroked._

_Letting out a long breath as Adam's touch soothed him, Kris began. "I... survived. I don't think I want to do it again, though," he admitted. "I don't know that it was worth it. I know my mom wants me to try, but the benefits seem non-existent. Based on what my father said tonight..." He winced. "He didn't believe what he said, but he_ still _said it. To_ hurt _. Who does that? Who says something like that? Damn. Damn. My mother wants it so much..."_

_"At the end, as we were leaving, he said he wants to call you," Adam reminded him, wanting to say that if Neil were his father, he'd be blocking his calls. Instead he checked on Emmaline asleep in her car seat in the back, before looking out the window. A lot of trees in the dark. Probably all sorts of animals. With claws. And southern accents. Creepy. And not in a cool way, like on True Blood. Maybe because bleeding didn't hurt in fiction._

_"I think he said that because he's afraid my mom is going to kick him out. You know I... one of the major reasons I came out here was because she wanted me to. Truth is, I wanted closure, I did. I would like to reconcile, but that's pie in the sky for both him and my brother. Daniel took a mission trip so he wouldn't be here when I visited, for godssakes! Talk about avoidance. So it's pie in the sky, I really think it is. But I owe to my mom, right? So coming out here... I also wanted to please my mom. You know how it is," Kris noted, secure that Adam was just as much a mama's boy as he was._

_"I do. We watched my mom's_ stoooooopid _dog, didn't we? Geez, my boots!"_

_Kris grinned suddenly, remembering the moment when Adam had discovered that the dog had pooped on one of his boots. "We did. I guess maybe I feel like one of your boots right now and maybe my father does too. My mother wants us to reconcile, but the two of us? I'm..."_

_Careful to frame his thoughts as a question, Adam asked, "You're not sure either of you wants it, though?" He looked at the window, keeping an eye on Kris' expressions in the reflection._

_"Yeah." Kris sighed. He didn't know what to do. He rolled his shoulders as he waited for Adam to give him his opinion. Then waited some more. This silence was weird. Adam was being quiet. And looking out the window. At nothing. "I'm not sure coming back here was a good idea. I guess I was right all along. This isn't my home any more. Maybe... it never was. My memory of it..._

_"Was like seeing mirrors in a fun house? Full of false entries and sharp edges? Angly."_

_"Yeah. Good visual. Great visual, actually... I feel disoriented and... angly. Thanks." Looking over at Adam who was still staring out the window, Kris relaxed. Finding home had been a long road, but... Finding home... that would be a good title for a song._

_"I can imagine," Adam said noncommittally or what he hoped was noncommittally. "I know when I went back to San Diego for the final three on Idol, it was so bizarre and well, anyway... If you want to talk, I'll listen."_

_Looking out the window down the darkened road, Kris admitted, "I don't know what to do next."_

_Biting his finger between his teeth to keep from giving Kris advice because apparently that was being bossy and that was a bad thing, Adam sucked in a breath. He ventured, "Well, I'm sure you'll figure it out."_

_Kris' head snapped to the side and he looked at Adam in shock. Why wasn't Adam giving him not only an opinion, but a point by point strategy for.... Oh._ Oh. _He'd told Adam to stop being so bossy and that apparently meant giving advice too. Well, good. He was a grown-ass man and he could figure it out on his own._

 _"Where is this motel, anyway?" Adam shifted in his seat. Conway wasn't that big and surely they'd been driving for_ ever _. "The dark side of the moon? Geez."_

 

Standing alone in the bar's storeroom surrounded by boxes, Kris tapped his sneaker impatiently against the concrete floor as he rang Adam's phone again. Again, it went to voicemail. Where the hell was he? It was late.

 

_  
"A long day for our little girl," Adam crooned in a low lullaby voice, carrying Emmaline into the motel room and Kris shut the door behind them. He gently laid her on the bed. Kris pulled off her sandals while Adam opened her suitcase. "And for you?"_

_"For me too." Kris smiled down at their daughter. "I feel the way she looks. I think I'll collapse now, then take a shower in the morning."_

_"We'll have to give her a bath or a shower in the morning too," Adam reminded Kris as Kris carefully undressed Emmaline for bed. "Crap, she didn't brush her teeth."_

_"They're gonna fall outta her head," Kris teased because Adam looked so serious as he pulled out Emmaline's pajamas and carefully folded up her dress. Biting his lip, Kris carefully unwound the ponytail holder from her hair, soothing her with soft sounds when she began to stir. Damn it, Dani was way better at the hair stuff._

_Contemplating the clothes in the case, Adam pulled another pink dress out and hung it up on the wire hangers in the tiny closet space. Brushing at the soft cotton, he asked in a whisper, "What were your plans for tomorrow and how did I screw them up?"_

_"You didn't screw anything up." Kris glanced up curiously as Adam turned around. Still serious. Probably still freaked out about that poster. Or... being called a pedophile. That might do it. What an asshole Neil Allen was. He repeated, "You didn't."_

_"I think I did," Adam said softly, watching Kris' hands as he gently handled their sleeping daughter. "Big time."_

_"Don't be silly." Kris shook his head as he took the Dora pajamas and the two men worked silently to put them on Emmaline before laying her in the middle of the king bed. "I had no real plans. I was wingin' it." Probably the story of his life. "Cale and I were mebbe going out fishin' or tubin', but nuthin' important."_

_Staring at Kris, Adam realized Kris hadn't understood. Just as well. Kris had enough to deal with being back in a place that he'd once called home; he didn't need to deal with Adam's crap. "Your accent's stronger," Adam observed finally with a smile when he noticed Kris staring at him curiously, obviously waiting for him to say something. He fished around in his own small suitcase and pulled out a toothbrush and toothpaste._

_"Prob'ly." Kris smiled since Adam had a thing for his accent. He followed Adam into the bathroom, grabbed his own toothbrush off the sink where he'd left it that morning and then took a closer look at Adam's face. It was... closed off. For once he couldn't read it. Weird. Then again, that whole pedophilia thing was probably sticking in Adam's craw. Lord knows that was how he felt -- like something hard and sharp and... angly was stuck in his chest every time he thought of his father. He forced himself to concentrate on Adam and take deep breaths. "But now that's Emmaline's here, Mama's gonna want to show her off, you know."_

_"That's what my mom said. So I brought along some fancy clothes." Adam squeezed out toothpaste onto his toothbrush and began brushing his teeth._

_"Good call." Kris frowned as he began brushing. "Wait, Mama's gonna want to take her to church and... no way."_

_"You don't want our daughter to hear something about how the gay perverts are going to hell--"_

_Kris finished, "Because the party phone line--"_

_"Party phone line? Seriously?" Adam finished brushing his teeth and grabbed a washcloth._

_"Nah. I mean Facebook." Kris spat out and rinsed his mouth, waiting while Adam washed his face. "It's prob'ly been on fire with the news that the biggest pervert this town's ever spawned is back, so the preacher won't be able to resist the opportunity, I'd bet. Yeah, she won't be takin' our baby to church proper. Mebbe the coffee hour?"_

_Adam nodded and walked back into the room. "_ If _you think it's safe. So... where else? The Walmart after church gets out? The stocks in the town square?"_

_Kris stifled a laugh. "The stocks are invisible nowadays. They're now called Facebook. That's where all the mud and rotten vegetables get flung."_

_"True." Pulling off his tee-shirt and digging around in his case, shoving aside the make-up case -- and why the hell had he brought that along? It was so damn hot here that any make-up would melt right off. He stared at the case in his hand. He'd probably be the only guy in town with make-up, irrespective of the heat index. Which didn't bother him, but Kris... He blurted out, "Did I make it way harder for you?"_

_"What?" Kris' voice was muffled as he pulled his own tee-shirt over his head. "Having Emmaline here was a great strategy. I'm sure my father acted as good as he did because of her."_

_"But me. I'm... not so great a strategy, am I?" Adam shook his head, hoping he was hiding his nervousness. "I'm sorry. You were right. I should've stayed home. I didn't think it through. My presence here will probably make it harder for you. People who might forgive you on your own probably won't if the big gay guy who kissed another guy on national tv is walking down the street. I... Maybe I should go back home tomorrow?"_

_"What the hell are you talking about?" Kris hissed in shock. Now that Adam was here, he realized that just having him here made a huge difference._

_"I don't want your trip here to become about me and..." Adam splayed his hands, palms up. "I didn't want that, you know? I just wanted to help. And I don't think I am. In fact, I think I'm a negative. I was a distraction earlier at your parents' home just being myself, but in town with others, it'll be about me as a celebrity and all the shit that comes with it. I'll make it harder for you, won't I? So maybe I should go home?"_

_"And here you go again, deciding what's best for me. Who do you think you are?"_

_Adam stared at him, his mouth agape. "You can't be serious."_

_"I'm serious. You're doing it again. Makin' decisions about what I need or want. How about_ askin' _me!"_

_"Whoa." Adam shook his head, really wishing he'd found an antacid in the bathroom drawer. "Are you now going to parse out everything I say? Because if you are, you need to note that I used the word 'maybe'. Which implies that I am undecided about the value of that option and I'm therefore waiting to hear your opinion. You might also want to note that I also used the word 'probably'. And I _asked_ if my presence was a bad strategy."_

_"How can you think that?" Kris snapped back, deciding to ignore Adam's imitation of an English teacher. "I don't want you to go away. I just need... space."_

_Adam looked at Kris and nodded slowly. "I understand. I'll give you space."_

 

"Everything okay?" John asked as Kris hauled a box behind the bar. He looked a little unsettled.

"Uh yeah." Kris pulled out a bottle of vodka and stared at the liquor. Somehow the two of them had made a mess. He'd talk to Adam when he got home and clear this all up.

 

Laughing gleefully at the laser light show, Adam danced in the general direction of somebody... He wasn't sure who and wasn't sure it mattered at this club. Just getting out on the floor and moving felt good. But he needed another drink. Or two. 

 

Damn it, it was past two o'clock. Kris put his guitar down, got up from the mushroom chair and moseyed over to the computer they both used to record their music. Frowning at the computer screen, Kris forced himself to not type in the password for Adam's current music folder. He knew it, after all. They knew all of each other's passwords, so that wasn't the issue, but... Looking would be way too nosey, intrusive even. But damn, he wished he knew what Adam was writing or rather thinking. Knowing Adam, he was probably over-thinking.

Right now, however, he wished he knew where Adam was and what he was doing. He checked the clock again. The bars were closed now, as he knew since he closed a bar for a living, so where the hell... He punched the speed dial number on his phone again. 

"Hey, runt."

"Neil?" Kris sat down on the mushroom chair. Talking to Adam's brother generally required sitting. And antacids. Or alcohol. On certain occasions, all three were a good idea. He had a feeling this was one of those occasions. "What's going on? Why are you answering Adam's phone? Is he okay?"

"Mostly. Sorry he didn't call you back earlier -- it must've been too loud for us to hear the ring at the club. So I thought you might like to know where Adam is."

"Ya think?"

"He's currently making a sacrifice to the lares and the penates."

"Lares and penates?" Kris repeated, remembering Adam considering "Lares and Penates" for a cd title. "Household gods? What the hell are you--"

"He's praying to my porcelain god, if I have to get specific."

"Is he sick?"

"He had a little too much to drink. But he was definitely having a good time before that. Dancing. In a crowd. Not with any one guy. So don't worry--"

"He... He went out with you? To a club?" Shaking his head, Kris tried to imagine how that had gone. Adam and Neil got along really well these days, but they were not what you'd think of as club partners. 

"Naturally. Who better to keep you out of trouble and off the TMZ channel than your very own brother? And I'm sure as all hell not going to take a picture of his dick and post it on the internet." 

"Thanks for the visual, you jerk." Kris sighed. "I suppose I should thank you for watching out for him," he said grudgingly. He didn't find Neil as annoying as he once had, but he'd never forget needing to throw mashed potatoes in his face either. 

"Why should you? His behavior is his own choice, not yours."

"Aren't you supposed to take his side?"

"What side? Are you two fighting?"

"Apparently. I didn't know it." Kris admitted, hoping that Neil's love of demonstrating how much he knew would actually work in Kris' favor tonight.

"How unlike my brother to avoid a fight." 

Okay, apparently not. "Why is everyone so fucking cryptic?"

"Okay. You want me to be blunt? I can be blunt about how _I_ feel."

Kris winced. Neil's blunt was usually a blunt object to the head. "Oh, why not?"

"Why is it okay for you to throw mashed potatoes at me at Thanksgiving in my mother's house when I was being an ass, but Adam can't say a word to defend you in yours?"

"What?" Kris gaped and jumped to his feet. He began pacing between the mushroom chair and the computer desk. "Okay, _totally_ different."

"Really? I don't see it. I'm offended that on behalf of the Lamberts that Adam didn't get to fling starches around. Don't you have those gritty things in Arkansas he could've used?"

"It's grits. With an s." Kris gritted his teeth, then asked, "Why did you call, aside from telling me where Adam is?"

"Isn't that sufficient?"

"Yeah, but you never do what's sufficient, Neil. You always have to cross that line and get sprayed with mashed potatoes, doncha?"

Neil grinned. He always loved sparring with Kris. The guy gave as good as he got. "Have I mentioned how distressed I am that I share a name with your sperm donor?"

"Ha. It's amazing how that name seems to be applied to people who are assholes."

"Neil Armstrong was an asshole?"

"Damn, I hate you."

"I'll stop. It's really late and you're not concentrating, so it's an unfair fight. Well, even _more_ unfair than usual." Neil smirked. It was so easy to get Kris going -- he could understand why Adam did it. 

"I can hear the stupid smirk in your voice."

"So it's not just Adam who can emote vocally. Maybe I too can have a career on the stage." Neil laughed, then grimaced when he heard a sound from his bathroom. "So, Arkansas. Your sperm donor. I hear he did back down when you stood up to him. Good news, right?"

"He did. I have to admit I was surprised when he caved." 

"Of course, he caved. He's a bully. Bullies always cave when you confront them with confidence." Neil paused. "Or a punch in the nose. By the way...."

"By the way?"

"Just to warn you. Adam's hands are a little jacked up. He might need a kiss or two to make them feel better." Neil grimaced. Oh hell. Kris probably would kiss Adam's hands. Why the hell Adam thought Kris would ever leave him... The boy needed a reality check. And to get out of his own head, his own stupid exaggerating insecure head. 

"What? Why?"

"He was feeling frustrated, so I took him to the gym and he used the punching bag."

Kris stopped pacing so fast he nearly tipped over. Adam and a punching bag? He couldn't even... " _That's_ what you two were doing?"

"That was the second activity in our fun-filled day. Our first was him taking me out geocaching."

"What? What?" Kris frowned and began rubbing the back of his neck. "But that's..."

"I know, Mighty Mouse. It's your thing with Adam. And like other things you have with Adam, I don't want to share it. Ewww." 

"Mighty Mouse?" Kris repeated, deciding that if Adam and Neil weren't going to make a habit of geocaching, he wouldn't care. Pick your battles. Speaking of which... "Well, I guess it's better than runt."

"And more accurate. You have a lot of power for all that you're the runt of the litter."

Kris stopped rubbing the back of his neck in shock. Neil had said Kris had power. This was a damn house of mirrors all over again. "You are the king of the left-handed compliment, aren't you?"

"We all have our skill sets. Like Dani always says, do what you're good at." 

"And what am I good at?" Kris mused, his eyes on that blinking and tempting password prompt.

"I can tell you one thing you excel at. Keeping Adam on an even keel. He has a tendency to go to extremes."

"He does." Kris grinned as a series of fun-filled memories passed by his mind's eye, then smiled again as he realized Neil had paid him a compliment. "Which is good since I tend to stay right in the middle and can use a tug off-center from time to time. He adds color and light to my life." 

"Hey. That's... sweet. Adam would appreciate the sentiment." Hearing the shower running, Neil added, "Let him know that tomorrow when he gets home." 

 

"Where's Dadum?" Emmaline looked up from her coloring book. "I wants to color with him."

"You wan _t_ to color with him," Dani corrected, looking down at the blue streaks across the page. "No sssss sound on the end of want."

"Okay..." Emmaline sighed. When both Kris and Dani ignored her, she shrugged. "Okay. I wan _t_ to color with Dadum. Where is he?"

"He should be back soon. He went out with Uncle Neil and a had a sleepover," Dani explained. 

"Without _me_?" Emmaline pouted. When no one responded, she continued, " _Uncle_ Neil, not Coke Man?" she asked, wrinkling her nose. "We's had fun yesterday when Uncle Neil came to get Dadum. Dadum was laughing so hard."

"Was he?" Kris put down his coffee cup. "No surprise. Those two can act like three year olds."

"Oh, they funny!" Emmaline giggled. "Uncle Neil is funny." 

"Did he toss you around?" Kris asked, already knowing the answer.

"He and Dadum tossed me around like a ball!" Emmaline grinned. "I was stunt girl! Very fun." 

"Fun for them..." Kris shivered. 

"They don't drop me, Uncakiss." Emmaline patted Kris' hand across the kitchen island. 

"I know. It just makes me nervous."

"Nervous?"

"It makes my tummy feel all tingly and weird," Kris explained to Emmaline, touching his mid-section.

"Is that why you touch your tummy when Coke Man was there in Grammy Kim's house? Is that why you get all growly when Coke Man calls?"

"I don't get growly."

"Yes, you do." Emmaline leapt off the stool. 

Kris closed his eyes, then popped them open when Emmaline's lowered voice began, obviously imitating him.

"No... no... no. I said no." Emmaline paced, rubbing her hand across the back of her neck. "No." She stopped and pointed at the doorway. In a harder and louder voice, she ordered, "Back off, Adummmm."

"I didn't say that to Adam. Did I?" Kris looked from Emmaline to Dani. No wonder Adam had been giving him too much space; like Neil said Adam always took stuff to the extreme. Which wasn't really Kris' fault. But still. It was rude. And probably not his best strategy.

Dani nodded. 

"Uh-oh..." Kris groaned. 

"Youse in trouble." Emmaline nodded. "Yes. You gonna set on the noddy stool?"

"They both should spend time on the naughty stool in their bedroom," Dani muttered under her breath. The two of them needed to just fight and fuck their way out of this mess already and if they didn't do it today she was going to break her own rule about not getting involved in their relationship and knock some sense into them both. 

"Coke Man is not Uncle Neil. Same name..." Emmaline looked up at her mother. It would be funny if Dadum and Uncakiss had to sit on the noddy stool in their bedroom. Why was it in there, anyway? 

" _Uncle_ Neil," Dani repeated. "Uncle Neil is the one who's over here all the time. He's Dadum's brother."

"I don't have a brother to play with... Or sister. It's very sad." Emmaline sighed.

"So you've said." Dani looked over at Kris and they both grinned, waiting for Emmaline to carry on.

"I am alooooooooooooooooone..." Emmaline tried again, climbing back up onto the stool at the kitchen island, pushing Kris' hands away when he tried to help.

"That's terrible." Dani agreed.

"You lead a miserable sad existence." Kris rolled his eyes. If Emmaline didn't become an actress, he'd eat the guitar pick he'd gotten from Paul McCartney. 

" _Very_ sad. I need a brother or sister." Emmaline paused, putting the blue crayon down to pick up an orange crayon. She waited. When no one responded, she offered, "I could cry?"

Dani turned away to keep from showing her smile or looking at Kris. She cleared her throat before telling her, "You could, but it wouldn't get you a brother or sister." 

"A puppy then? Puppies are good! As long as they don't poop on Dadum's boots. But my puppy wouldn't. So I wants...wan _t_ a puppy. For my birthday?" Emmaline pretended to blow out the orange crayon. "My birthday wish!"

"That's a big wish for a little girl," Kris told her, looking at the clock on the kitchen wall. Adam was going to get home soon or he was going to go get him. "Requires lots of talking. Everyone has to agree."

"About what?" Adam asked, walking into the kitchen, closely followed by Neil.

"Dadum! Uncle Neil!" Emmaline shrieked. She clambered onto the kitchen island and threw herself off, yelling, "Catch stuntgirl!"

"There you are!" Neil cried out, catching her and swinging her around.

"What do we need to be in agreement about?" Adam asked again, smiling at his daughter, then looking from Dani to finally, after a deep breath, to Kris. Who was looking at him and smiling like he'd been gone a month instead of only overnight. Oy. Emotional whiplash.

"I want a brother," Emmaline told Neil. "Or a puppy."

Neil shook his head. "I'd totally go with the puppy. Waaay more fun." 

"But you and Dadum had a sleepover. That must be fun."

"Oh, it was indeed." Neil nodded in Adam's direction. "So much fun Adam had to borrow a shirt from me." 

Kris shook his head and reached out, curling his hand around Adam's wrist. "C'mere." Pulling Adam's hand around, he looked for evidence of Adam's bout with a punching bag. He smiled and raised the hand to his lips, saying softly, "Neil said I needed to kiss your hand and make it better."

"Oh gag." Neil winced. "Take it elsewhere while I flirt with Dani and torture my niece." 

"Uncakiss needs to go sit on the noddy stool in your bedroom, Dadum," Emmaline said, laughing as Neil kissed her cheek with a loud smacking sound.

"Does he?" Adam asked.

"You both do! Mama said so." Emmaline grinned. It was funny that the big boys were in trouble.

Dani winced. The child had the hearing of a bat or something. She rolled her eyes. "True enough, you two. Go up there right now."

Emmaline giggled. "Youse both in trouble. Bad boys." 

"Adammmm..." Kris began, following Adam into their bedroom. "I feel like mebbe we need to talk."

"Okay." Adam took a deep breath and turned around, prepared. No matter what Neil said, shit happened in life. Shit you'd never expect. Like-- oh, look at Kris' earnest brown eyes. He looked anxious. Or maybe he was just mirroring Adam's eyes. Oh, who knew? "Talk." 

"First of all, why do you have that look on your face?"

"What look?"

"I'm gonna..." Kris gritted his teeth and angrily slammed the bedroom door behind him. He saw the flash of anxiety, then annoyance that flashed across Adam's face. Ha! Adam was angry? Ha! Actually good. Feeling hopeful because make-up sex was always great, he locked the door as well. "That look that's nothing. A big nothing. That tells me nothing. Why are you hiding?"

"Why does anyone hide?" Adam asked, knowing he was prevaricating. But damn it, he needed a moment to take a breath and say it. Although maybe he needed to just get over himself since Kris had locked the door which usually meant sex was imminent and although some guys would have sex before they dumped you, yeah, been there, done that, Kris wouldn't. No, Kris wouldn't. Kris liked having make-up sex after a fight and clearly they were about to have one and --

"GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD AND TALK TO ME!" Kris yelled impatiently. He could actually see, he'd swear to it, the forty katrillion thoughts Adam was processing flash by in his eyes. He wondered if Adam could see bits of his head starting to explode because that's what it felt like as he shoved his hands through his hair.

Automatically smiling at the sight of Kris going totally hedgehog and realizing that he might have read something out of nothing because Kris wouldn't be screaming at him to talk if he didn't want to hear and oh shit and oh yeah, Adam shrugged. "But anyone would want to gather their thoughts..." 

"I don't give a shit about anyone else. I give a shit about _you._ And when you spend too much time gathering your thoughts, you have this tendency to gather up crazy stuff. So. Talk to me. I can't fix what I don't know is broken, although I can guess it's something to do with telling you I need space and you taking it too far. Like Milky Way far or Andromeda Strain far or a galaxy far far away far. Or something. Why have you been so far away?"

Taking a deep breath, Adam explained in a rush. "I thought I was giving you what you wanted. Or...maybe I was protecting myself. Because I've been afraid you were going to break up with me."

"WHAAAAT?"

_Thud_

Stepping back in shock and banging into the door, Kris stared at Adam. "I...must be hallucinating from lack of sleep -- which is your fault for not coming back home last night -- and stress and... _What_ did you say?"

"I said that I thought you were going to break up with me because I can't really stop being bossy. Not entirely. I mean, I can _try_ to dial it back." Adam nodded, then waited. When Kris just kept staring at him like he was speaking gibberish, Adam began to babble nervously, "But I can't stop it because it's more intrinsic to me than my ginger hair. I mean, I can't even cover up my bossiness the way I can with my hair and--"

"You...what?" Kris rubbed his ears. "You thought I was going to break up with you? What? Why... Why the actual fuck would you think such a ridiculousstupididioticdumbasfuckIcanteventhinkthing?"

Adam gaped at Kris, then glared at him. "Oh don't you dare get irate with me!" He pointed at Kris' face. "Because you _said_ \--"

"Hoooooo oh ho no no no! I said _no_ such thing." Kris stared at Adam in shock. Where did he come up with this craziness? "It would be nice -- really nice -- if something would make sense for a change--"

"That's from Alice in Wonderland. We all watched it with Emmaline the other day."

"Thank you, oh master of the movie quotation!" Kris rolled his eyes, then grimaced. "It's perfect, though. Because I feel like I've fallen down a fucking rabbit hole! Because I did not say that. I never said that. I never even _thought_ that, so how could I say it?"

"Yes, you did! _You_ said I had to mend my ways _or else_. And you know what -- I need to know at this point. I need to know. Because I can't take this see-sawing back and forth like I'm constantly being tested. And honestly, I don't know if I can completely stop being bossy. I really don't, because it's like hard-wired into me and while I can tone it down, I can't really stop, so--"

"Ohmigod, _slow_ down!" Kris shot forward and grabbed Adam's arms and squeezed them hard. "Listen _up_. Listen to my actual words, not your thoughts. Or your fears."

"Ouch." Although, Adam thought, Kris' words were the opposite of painful since he was starting to think that Neil and Geoffrey and of course, his mom, were right and that he'd made something out of mostly nothing. Uh-oh. 

"Truth hurts, which I know 'cause you've told me enough truths!" Kris snapped. "First off, the or else was _not_ that I was going to dump you. That thought never entered my mind. Get it? _Get it_?" 

Staring down into Kris' aggravated but sincere face, Adam felt that tight knot in his stomach begin to unwind. Had he leapt to some stupid conclusion out of his own fear and -- okay, it wasn't all his fault. Kris was confusing and -- 

"Answer me," Kris demanded, seeing the slow relaxation in Adam's face. He didn't know quite what this mess was about but he'd bet that Adam's damn insecurities had been winning the day. Damn it, damn himself, why hadn't he noticed? He opened his mouth to speak, then lost his train of thought as Adam grabbed him, pulled him close and covered his mouth in a deep kiss that spoke of relief and love and possession all at once. The truth was in the kiss, he thought as their lips clung one last time before Adam raised his head with a smile. "Got it?"

"Got it. Got you." Wrapping his arms tightly around Kris, Adam rested his cheek against Kris' hair and breathed in deeply, forcing his tight muscles to loosen.

"You do got me. Don't forget that again. And don't make me sing the Sonny part of Sonny and Cher's I Got You Babe song, okay?" Nuzzling into Adam's neck, Kris kissed the warm skin, noting how hard Adam's pulse was beating under the skin. Realizing how anxious Adam had truly been, Kris felt his annoyance step down with each beat. Adam had actually been worried and that worry had been real to him, just like Kris' anxiety about his parents was real to him. But right now, Adam was the one needing the stroking. Or the poking. 

"So what _was_ the 'or else' then?" Adam asked, his lips traveling down Kris' neck.

Grinning, Kris tilted his head and shivered at the feel of Adam's mouth on his skin, then slid his own hands under Adam's shirt. Biting at his shoulder, Kris explain, "It was... or else I was gonna kill you. Or have that stupid dog of your mother's over and _give_ him your Rick Owens boots."

"You are evil!" Adam gasped, putting his hand over his thumping heart as the culmination of his anxiety and adrenaline of the last few weeks made his pulse pound. 

"Or give an interview to Perez about our sex life--"

"You wouldn't!" Feeling a smile curve his lips upward at the ridiculousness of the notion that the very private Kris would even agree to be in the same room as that bottom feeder, Adam acknowledged to himself that he might have been a little hyper. Maybe. Just a wee bit.

Sliding his arms around Adam's waist and giving him a tight hug, Kris continued, "Or make you listen to Taylor Swift without the autotune." Pulling back to see Adam's face, Kris finished with what he knew was a coup de grace, "Or... invite Danny Gokey to dinner--"

"Okay, now that's going too far--"

"I was not not not gonna leave you. Honestly!" Kris slapped Adam's butt. "I swear, you're like the Partridge in a Pear Tree come to life."

Adam blinked as his relieved comprehension that Kris had not meant to imply that he was leaving him was confused by some Christmas song gibberish. He stared down into Kris' expectant face and teasing brown eyes and wandered if he'd somehow wandered out of Kansas or into a really bizarre chess match or what. "It's emotional whiplash again. I need a neck brace -- No! A heart brace!"

"Whataya mean _again_?"

"You were giving me emotional whiplash. I need to know the boundaries, not be pulled and pushed hither and yon."

"Hither and yon?" Kris smiled. Who talked like that? Only Adam. Oh and Geoffrey. 

"You know what I mean! One minute you were pushing me away, yelling at me that I shouldn't have come to Conway, then when I offer to go home, you get mad at me. Then we're back home and telling me to back off and the next you were asking me what movie we should see. You tell me not to boss you around, then you act like you're waiting for me to give you advice about your parents and then when I do, you snap my head off. One minute you ask what I think of a song you're working on and the next minute you tell me that your musical career is so different from mine that my experiences aren't relevant. One minute--"

"I think you're exaggerating..." Kris drawled. Because Adam had to be doing his over-dramatic version of the truth. And his impassioned ramblings were awesome and he wanted more of them and some even more awesome make-up sex. He wiggled deeper into Adam's embrace and rubbed his cock against Adam's thigh, hoping they could move onto the make-up sex soon. 

"Did you hit your head in Conway? Did they feed you some weird southern brownies? What's really in that cake that your mother said was made with Coke? Or that dis _gus_ ting Jello salad -- did it have a homegrown drug in there that affects your neurological processing?"

"My neurological processing?!" Kris bent forward and banged his head against Adam's chest. They could be having awesome make-up sex right now and yet Adam was still arguing? Seriously. What was wrong with this picture? "You're the insane one!"

"I'm not the one talking about Christmas songs!" Adam argued, enjoying the solid weight of Kris against his own body. And the wiggling. And the stupid arguing, because that meant they were back on track and he'd apparently over-reacted to Kris, although Kris really had confused him. Had? He was _still_ confusing him. "I'm a _partridge_ in a _pear_ tree? What does that mean? Am I David Cassidy? Did you buy some weird colored school bus? Are you on some hallucinogenic drug? Did Brad give you a funny mushroom?"

"You are insane. I mean it, like seriously, certifiably insane." Kris stared at Adam. "C'mon, this is way obvious. You were like the lords-a-leaping, the way you leap to conclusions, it's like the Partridge in a Pear Tree, only it's like those freaky-deeky trees with the arms in the Wicked Witch's Forest in the Wizard of Oz..." Kris froze as he saw Adam get that thinking-about-music-and-videos look. "Oh no, oh no, I came up with that image, I'm gonna use it in a song!"

"Not if I can get to the notepad first!" Adam taunted, his fear disappearing like dump cake on Kris' plate. He untangled his arms from around Kris and jumped forward.

As Adam lunged for the pad on Kris' nightstand, Kris grabbed for Adam's arm. "No fair, your legs are longer and you were... leaping! Like the damn song. I was right...oommph!" Kris' breath left his chest in a rush as his feet tangled with Adam's and Adam circled him with his arms and pushed them forward so that the bed broke their fall instead of the floor.

Taking advantage of the fall, Kris immediately climbed over Adam and snatched at the notepad, only to be distracted by Adam's mouth on his arm, gently biting his bicep. "Oooooh. Okaaaay. The pad can wait-- Hey!" Kris' low groan turned into a squawk of protest as he realized Adam was using his distraction to sneak the pad away from him.

Adam grinned as Kris complained. He slid back in the bed to sit up and held the pad over Kris' head. "I win."

"Ha! I win!" Kris held up two pens. "A compromise is in order. We could take turns?"

"Perish the thought." Smiling, Adam tore off a page of the notepad and handed it to Kris, along with the pen. They both scribbled away, then flung their paper and pens onto the nightstand. Kris immediately straddled Adam's hips and sighed happily when Adam slapped his hands on Kris' ass and ground Kris into his groin. Rocking back and forth, Kris hurriedly urged, "Okay, let's focus on priorities like say, you taking off your clothes, then mine, then gettin' super-duper toppy with me--"

Adam laughed as Kris wiggled on his lap. This was more like it. This was the way they should be. "You and your make up sex."

"What can I say? I like it when you get aggravated and get all dominant. In bed." Kris poked Adam's shoulder, then ran his hands down Adam's chest and tugged at the hem of his shirt, groaning when Adam started to speak. " _Now_ he talks?" 

"Wait. Let's get it all out. Okay?" Adam waited. When Kris nodded, he began again. "Lately, you've been pushy yourself. Toppy. Way more than usual. Normally, you want to top every once in a blue moon, but since we came back from Conway, you--"

"I have," Kris agreed. "I think...I was reacting to you pushing away. I wanted to pull you back to me and... well, the way to do that seemed to be to be inside you, ya know?"

Adam nodded, then decided he needed to ask. He blurted, "And it didn't have anything to do with proving to your father that you're a man by sticking it to me instead of the other way around?"

"I... no!" Kris protested in shock. He stared at Adam, his eyes so wide and unblinking for so long that his contacts started to get uncomfortable. He blinked quickly, then slumped in confusion as he saw Adam waiting for his answer. Had he done that? No. He couldn't have. Right? "I don't think so?"

"I'd like you to think about it. Because you know, the truth is, I'm a guy and if sex is available, the only thinking that's going on is my dick saying, 'Sounds good!'"

"What does your dick actually sound like?" Kris asked.

"Barry White." Adam grinned when Kris giggled. "And Barry's saying..." He deepened his voice, " _Oh yeaaaaaaaaahhhhhh..._ But then afterwards I'm wondering if you--"

"Good god, no!" Kris exclaimed. He shook his head frantically. "No. I swear. I...wow. No. I felt you getting away from me and I wanted, needed to claim you. God, now I feel icky. Is..." He put his hand on Adam's face and looked into his eyes. "Is that how you felt afterwards?"

"Well, kinda the last time, you had this fight with your father and then you immediately fell on top of me and--"

"Because I wanted to feel something real and happy and true!" Kris explained, groaning in frustration. "I should have explained it instead of assuming you'd just get it. But Adam... you gotta talk to me about this stuff. I don't understand why you didn't. You talk about everything. To death. So why -- Oh." Kris frowned. "Was it because I was working my own shit out and I kept telling you to give me space? I swear it's like we both fell down the rabbit hole in Conway and drank a bottle of stuff that made us feel small."

"Good analogy." Adam nodded. 

"But you tell me first how you felt small. Why you weren't pushing back at me when I was pushing at you."

"I didn't want to give you more stuff to worry about and..." He bit his lip. "I don't know."

"You do know. Tell me," Kris pressed. Adam was usually the nurturer, but everyone needed to be taken care of sometimes. And this was one of those times. Thank god Geoffrey had said something and Neil had apparently pushed Adam into talking to him. 

"It's... Sometimes I have these moments where I can't believe how lucky I am and it seems so impossible, so unbelievable. I wanted love for so long and I started to believe it wasn't happening for me and then it did. And it's been so long now, I still can't believe sometimes that it's forever and I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop...."

"Don't ever worry about me leaving you..." Kris brushed his lips across Adam's. "I'm a sure thing." 

"Well, a person can have sex and it doesn't mean more than that."

"That's not what I meant." Looking down in Adam's wide eyes, Kris saw the need for reassurance and nodded. "Okay. I'm a sure thing in that what I feel for you, what we have is -- from my heart -- forever. There is no reason for you to ever think otherwise. I'm a sure thing when it comes to this forever business. Okay?" Kris reached for his discarded piece of paper, then held it up. "Here."

"Let me see!" Adam snatched the pad away from Kris, then smiled as he read the words.

"See?" Kris pointed at the pad. "Those may not be the most original lyrics ever although Paul McCartney made the gist of them into a hit song, but they are the truest." He watched the sweet smile on Adam's face as he looked from the paper to Kris and back to the paper again, running his fingers over the writing. He knew some people thought Adam was high maintenance, but really, it was pretty simple to keep him happy. If he just paid some fucking attention. 

Damn, he'd been a stupid fool, Adam decided. The universe had given him the most amazing gift the day he'd had the opportunity to spend thirty-eight cents to find the love of his life and he'd let doubts ensnare him.

Kris shook his head as he watched Adam's fingers trace the words he'd written. How stupid he'd been to waste time focusing on trying to find some sort of relationship with a man who'd rejected him, insulted him, and dishonored him instead of focusing on the relationship that had given him light and warmth and love over and over. "I mean those words. I meant them when I said them five years ago, I mean them today and I'll mean them fifty years from now. I love you, sweetie, forever." 

"'I love you, Sweetie, I love you. Forever. Let me define forever for you...'" Adam read the long list, clearly meant to be sung in a sing-song, almost lullaby voice and smiled. He carefully put the pad back down, then touched the words with his fingertips once again. "I'm sorry I let my insecurities get the best of me and leapt to conclusions. Mea culpa."

"'S'okay..." Kris frowned. "I was probably confusing you because I was confused myself. But... I can't get over that you honestly thought I was going to dump you. How? Adam, what was going on?" Kris pressed, wanting Adam to talk about his insecurities. Bringing them into the open was the only way to fight them. 

"I'll acknowledge that I leapt to a conclusion--"

"Why? Because of your insecurities?"

"Yeah. Sometimes..." Adam plucked at the fabric of the shirt over his stomach. "Sometimes you know they're like this...monster baby trying to get out. Like in the movie, Alien?"

Wrinkling his nose as he thought of the Alien movie, Kris wiggled. "That scene's disgusting."

"I know, right? And most of the time, I push them down or these days, don't even know they're there. Then...something happens and it's like they were just hiding, waiting... and they surprise me." Adam smoothed the shirt back down, smiling as Kris brushed his hands aside and tugged on the shirt, obviously wanting him to pull it off. He complied, then opened up to admit, "I... wrote a song about it, actually. I wrote a lot of songs the last few weeks. Trying to sort this shit out."

"I..." Kris stopped in his smooth strokes of Adam's bare skin and then forced himself to continue. "I..uh know. Geoffrey told me."

"He what?"

"He thought I knew -- don't blame him," Kris said quickly. He braced himself for Adam to explode, then blinked as Adam shrugged. Sometimes... Anyway, focus, Allen. 

"Oh, whatever." Adam waved his hand. Geoffrey was a busybody, but he meant well. "But my monsters -- you have them too, don't you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You really want me to do this? To talk to you? Because I'll do my best not to be bossy, but I might veer into pushy."

"Truth is, I need you to talk to me. Not just about your own shit, but to help me with mine." Kris smiled. "It really does help me figure my shit out. I can do it on my own, but I do it better with you." He grinned and wiggled on Adam's lap. 

"Kinda like sex." Adam grinned back and tightened his hold on Kris' ass. 

"What do you think I should do? Not about sex," Kris explained, then pouted as Adam slid his hand up his back and began kneading his shoulders. "Although we could just have sex now and talk later. Or have sex now, talk later, then have more sex even later?"

"Not yet." Digging his fingers into Kris' shoulders, Adam raised his eyebrows. "Wow, you're really tight here."

"So's my ass." Kris leered as Adam laughed, then admitted, "Okay, my shoulders are tight because I'm stressed. Which..." Kris rocked back and forth, grinning triumphantly as he felt Adam's cock harden under him. "But sex is the perfect way to de-stress and... and yet, you have that We're-Gonna-Have-a-Talk-look on your face, which might have been a really good look to wear like a while ago--"

"And you have that I'm-Avoiding--a-Difficult-Conversation look on your face. Take it from me, that just makes it all worse." 

"Okay, shoot." Kris winked. "Like say, in my ass?"

"In a minute. First -- what do you think you should do?" Adam cupped Kris' face in his hands. "Don't think about it. Just answer this question as fast as you can -- What would make you happy?"

"Never talking to him again," Kris blurted out, then blanched. "There, I said it. The best we can be is... I don't even know."

"Polite strangers?"

"If he can even be polite. That's not a given. But that's the best I can do. I know it will disappoint my mom and..." He froze, then nodded. "I've been afraid too. Afraid of upsetting my mom, disappointing her. Afraid of making that final emotional break with my father. Afraid of..." Kris closed his eyes. One thing at a time. Baby steps. "Making that final break where I truly admit that I did have some hope. Deep down inside. Then he said that horrible evil shit to me and more importantly, you. You were just an innocent bystander. And it has to be done, right? No, not a question, a statement. I have to do it. I know it and, but... And it's like a death, you know?"

"I think the worst thing to lose is hope."

"Yeah. And I feel terrible about all of it. Not just losing hope, I opened a can of worms."

"Because going back made him think you were the kid who had to take his shit?"

"It's like... agreeing to talk to him gave him permission to start it up all over again. Like he can't learn to just let it go, let me go without trying again to make me over."

"I haven't seen that you can make someone over by treating them like shit. Unless your goal is to make them feel like shit." 

"Well, he succeeded in that. Or..." Kris shook his head, absently tracing the sprinkling of freckles on Adam's chest. "Not really, though. Oh god, I'm torn. Between anger and sadness." 

Adam bit his lip, then asked, "Can I ask you a question?"

"Please. Go on the way you do." Kris nudged Adam's hip with his knee. "Truth is, I... uh... mighta said to Geoffrey that I couldn't figure this out without you drilling me--"

"Drilling you?" Adam asked with a leer.

"Later, you promised," Kris reminded him, grinding down at Adam's crotch. 

"Ah, geez, you're all grown up and have priorities now?" Adam teased.

"Talking about my father kinda kills the mood, ya know?"

"Yeah, I do know." Grimacing, Adam stroked his hands up and down Kris' back, feeling the tension in the still-tight muscles. 

"Okay, so you _want_ me to ask you questions, right?" Adam confirmed. When Kris nodded, Adam continued. "You were brought up believing family is everything and part of that is to always respect your elders and to put up with family no matter what?"

"Yeah, that's it."

"And yet, your family didn't put up with you no matter what, did they?" Adam asked.

"No. I crossed a line."

"And you crossing a line made it okay to dump you, even though you were family. So...?"

Kris hid his smile at Adam's obvious effort to reframe his comments as questions. "So you're saying that if the rules are that it's okay to dump me 'cause I crossed a line, it should be okay for me to dump him 'cause he crossed a line?"

"Yeah. Then again, I could ask like I did before, why do you want to play by the rules of people who rejected you? Why not make your own rules?"

"So either way... the point is to do what's best for me, even if it means following my own rules and making my own path." 

"Isn't that what you've been doing? For years? And successfully too?"

"I have." Kris smiled and pressed full-length against Adam, taking a deep breath. "What do you think?"

"I said before that I think he's toxic. Seeing him in his natural environment only deepened my dislike of him and my belief that having him in your life as anything more than a polite stranger is a very bad thing. That's my opinion. Doesn't have to be yours," Adam said carefully, trying to find his way along the new path Kris wanted to set. 

Kris nodded slowly.

"You know..." Adam decided to try a different route. "You know a lot of people out here. People who migrated here because their hometown or homelife didn't work for them. They took a different path than was laid out for them."

"The road less traveled?"

"Like that. And you started on that road because that man threw you away. You made your own way---"

"Kinda. I had help..." Kris told him absently, thinking of some decisions he'd made that had sent him down paths that led him... He looked back up, into Adam's eyes and relaxed. The destination justified the sometimes dark and dangerous forks in the road. 

"We all have help," Adam agreed. "But do you feel that the destination you reached on a road you couldn't have imagined traveling while you were back there--"

"Is far better than anything back there. There, I was kinda stuck in a round-about, a traffic circle and couldn't get out of it. And I got sent out here, on a road way less traveled by people back there, a road that led out to something different, with way more paths branching off of it, some bad, some good." Kris paused to lean forward and kiss Adam's lips, feeling the smile under his own lips and the warmth of Adam against his front and in the strength of the arms around him. 

"Good for me and Geoffrey and Lane and Dani and Emmaline and so many of us," Adam said softly. "That path led you here and we're better for it too. I can't even imagine life without you."

"Same here. I can't even imagine where I'd be now other than here. Right here." Kris smiled and nodded. He looked at Adam's warm smile and warmer eyes, then out the window into the sunlight, seeing the flicker of reflected light on the water of the pool on the ceiling. "And maybe it's time to realize that the road between here and there isn't a two way street. It never was. It's a one-way trip to... a new life, a new me. And he can't be a part of it, 'cause he keeps trying to pull me back..."

"Pull you down. To his level. To a life that isn't right for you, that won't make you happy?" Adam asked, careful to ask a question instead of making a statement. This boundary was going to take some work. "So what do you think you need to do?"

"I think I need to kick him to the curb." Kris sat quietly and listened for that still small voice that told him the deepest truths. Sometimes he didn't want to listen, sometimes he ignored it, sometimes he leapt to do what it said like one of those lords in the Christmas song which -- no matter what Adam said -- had made total sense as an analogy, sometimes he made his way slowly down the path the voice led. This time... the voice was telling him to make a clean start in all things. Well, he'd start with cleaning up this mess. Maybe later, he'd work on the other... he shrugged as he watched Adam run his fingers over that piece of paper that apparently did reassure him. 

"You okay?" Adam asked softly, forcing himself to patience as Kris clearly worked through something in his head.

"I'm good. Or getting to good. Are _we_ okay?"

"Yeah. I... This thing with me being bossy. I need you to figure out the boundaries though."

"How about we work through them together," Kris suggested. He leaned forward to pick up Adam's hand from the piece of paper, then pointed at it. "I think I want you to keep that. In your pocket."

"It would get ruined after a while..." Adam noted absently as he watched Kris impatiently pull his tee-shirt over his head and threw it to the floor.

"Then like laminate it or something." Kris smiled smugly as he saw Adam's appreciative look at his chest, just before his hands came up and began stroking skin that suddenly felt hot and tight. "Or maybe I'll tattoo it on my chest so you can read it every time you see me."

"I think I'd prefer a nipple ring." Adam winked as he pinched Kris' nipples, laughing as Kris' shrieked, then giggled. 

"You and that damn nipple ring." Kris rolled his eyes, then gasped when Adam bent his head and bit his nipple. Damn. "That's a little...oh yeah, like that... obvious."

"Obvious? I have to tell you that your idea of obvious is not...normal."

"What's that mean?" Kris threaded his hands through Adam's thick hair, holding him to his chest, groaning as Adam's tongue and teeth made his nipples jut eagerly. 

"I was supposed to get that you were referring to me leaping to conclusions based upon the title of a Christmas song." Adam shook his head, then gave the nipple under his lips a long, slow lick. "Talk about cryptic."

"Me! Cryptic! Cryptic!" Kris reached out and jerked open Adam's zipper. "I'm a damn open book."

"It's not your book I want open." Adam pushed Kris' hands away, then shoved Kris backwards on the bed. He smiled as Kris eagerly wiggled his ass on the bed as Adam quickly pulled his jeans off. "It's your legs."

"I can do that!" Kris grinned as he bent his knees, planted his feet on the bed and lifted his butt up. Goody, make up sex was happening! "I can do anything you want."

"And you will." Adam took Kris' wrists in one hand and shoved them over his head before sliding his body up Kris' and taking his mouth in a deeply possessive kiss that had them both gasping.

"I will. Anything..." Kris hitched a breath as Adam's mouth moved swiftly down his body and he pushed Kris' legs even further apart, then began licking until Kris cried out, "Anywhere you want."


	52. Awards and rewards along the way

**Chapter 52: Awards and rewards along the way  
Rating: R**

"Perfect," Dani whispered to herself, looking down at the image in her phone before quickly sending it to Leila and Kim. 

"Wha...." Adam grumbled. "Light..." 

"Shh... Go back to sleep..." Danielle whispered, cursing herself for taking a photo with flash when Adam was so obviously exhausted. But she couldn't resist when coming home from shopping she saw Adam sprawled in the large chaise in the sitting area of the boys' bedroom. Kris was curled into one side and Emmaline cradled between them, all three of them fast asleep.

"I...That's okay." Adam sighed and blinked his eyes. Looking down, he sighed happily. He looked up at Dani and smiled. "I have the best life ever. I don't want to miss a thing." 

"Me too, babe. Me too." Dani carefully set down the camera and snuggled against Adam's free side, putting her arm around him for a tight hug. "I missed you. We all did."

"I really have to re-work my schedule," Adam said with a sigh. In the wake of his Grammy nomination, he'd been on the road doing promo for nearly three weeks and Kris had stayed home, breaking his own rule about not being apart for no more than three days. But Emmaline had been starting a new pre-school and Kris -- wisely, in Adam's opinion -- had thought that change plus Adam's absence was enough in their little girl's life. 

"You really need to slow down a bit," Dani agreed. This year had been a whirlwind and from both a commercial and creative standpoint, Adam had never been better, but the circles under his eyes told a different tale about his energy reserves. "Just a smidge."

"You've said that before." Adam leaned his head back against the chaise and waited for the litany of complaints to begin. If not Dani, then Kris. If not Kris, then his mom. If not his mom, then Lane. If not Lane, then Alisan. If not Alisan, then...

"And I'll keep saying that until you listen. That stupid big mess with Kris weeks ago was partly because you weren't thinking straight because you're exhausted. Trying to record while being on the road, being pulled all over--"

"Hither and yon." Adam smield sleepily. "Hither and yon. Hey -- that's a great song title."

"Totally. Except who knows what that means besides English teachers?"

"We do."

"Well, we're impossibly erudite." Dani winked. "Even you, the college drop out."

"Humph. I've gotten by." 

"Yeah, your trophy room demonstrates that."

"Not _my_ trophy room. My mom and Kris put that together." Adam shuddered. Sometimes he thought his mom and Kris got along a little too well. "Lane told me that Mom even framed the certificate of my nomination." 

"They're proud of you. And so am I. I just think you need to --"

"Slow down. I know." Adam rolled his eyes. He could slow down when he was old. Right now, he just needed a bit of rescheduling. "And for the record..."

"What are you going to be argue about now?" Dani grinned. Adam did love to lecture. He would've actually made a good teacher.

"I'm not arguing, merely pointing out a comment of yours that needs clarification. That big mess with Kris was also partly his fault. He's not Mr. Perfect."

"He's not?" Dani gasped then reached over Adam to poke at Kris. Damn, he and Emmaline could sleep through anything. "Kris. Hey, Mr. Perfect--"

"Not perfect..." Kris grumbled. "I'm too short."

Adam gushed with a wink in Dani's direction, "Oh, you're so wittle and cute! I could just squish you! And pinch your wittle cheeks."

"I'm gonna kill you." Kris pushed up on his hand and leaned over Emmaline, who stirred. "After I kiss you, that is."

"Me first!" Emmaline shrieked, coming instantly awake and talking at the same time, as always. 

"Oh no, _me_ first. I missed him the most," Kris teased. 

"Missed you, missed you, now I gotta kiss you!" Emmaline yelled, launching herself on top of Adam.

"Sweet...." Adam smiled and kissed Emmaline's hair as she snuggled into his hug. "Did you make that up?"

"No, Uncakiss did!" 

Blushing, Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "Guilty as charged."

"Well, come here then." Adam slid his hand around the back of Kris' neck to pull him down, smiling when Kris put his hand on top of his. "Where's my kiss?"

"He already gave you a kiss!" Emmaline giggled. "When we came home, you were already asleep and he gave you a kiss. But you're not like Sleeping Beauty -- you didn't wake up." Emmaline poked at his cheek. "Were you fakin' it?" 

"Hmmm. Maybe he didn't kiss me hard enough."

"Maybe..." Danielle grinned and plucked her daughter off of Adam's chest. "It only works when the couple is alone. Remember in the Sleeping Beauty movie -- no one was in the room with Prince Charming and Aurora." 

"Awone? Oh." Emmaline sighed. "I gets it. Uncakiss wants to wiggle around on Dadum."

"WHAT?" The three adults exclaimed, Dani laughing. 

"I swear, Dani..." Kris began. He could just hear his father accusing him of corrupting children again and... He looked down as he felt pain in his hand and saw Adam squeezing it hard enough that his knuckles were turning white. Well, that had made him pay attention. 

"Bad path. Don't go there..." Adam warned softly, before turning to their daughter. "What did you see, Emmaline?"

"What I always see. Uncakiss likes to sit on your lap." She paused to shake her finger at Kris. "I am the kid. I get the lap."

Adam gently grasped her finger and put her hand down. "My lap is big enough to share." 

"Not when Uncakiss is on it!" Emmaline giggled at the big-eyes Uncakiss had. "Like that time when we were sposed to be watching Ariel and I was on the floor. I mighta gone asleep and I looked up and Uncakiss was on your lap, being like a wiggly worm and kissin' you." 

"What did you think about that?" Danielle asked, working hard to hide her smirk as she saw the identical expressions of discomfort on the guys' faces.

"They wikes kissing each other." Emmaline shrugged. "But it's not as much fun to watch as the cook chasing 'Bastian, so I watches my movie." 

"Well, then I suggest you go watch a movie, because I'm gonna kiss him. A lot." Kris smirked as Emmaline pouted.

Dani laughed as she began walking away with a protesting Emmaline on her hip. "Sounds like a plan." Danielle paused at the door. "Well, go ahead, Kris. We have a couple of hours before we barbeque for dinner. So plenty of time for you to wiggle around on top of Adam." 

"Barbeque?" Adam asked as Dani left the room, carefully closing the door behind her. 

"Yeah. But first, the meat needs to be prepared. For the skewer..." Kris wiggled his eyebrows as he slid onto Adam's lap. "If you know what I mean?"

"You know cooking is not in my repertoire. You better explain it to me. In explicit detail." Adam leered as his fingers slid into Kris' loose shorts.

"Well, marination is the key to a tasty piece of meat..." Kris shoved his hardening cock into Adam's warm hand. "So you need to wet my meat."

"My pleasure." Adam shoved Kris' shorts and underwear down, then pulled him up with two hands on his ass. "Nice piece of meat, by the way."

"All for you...ouuu..." Kris groaned as Adam's mouth engulfed him. He bit his lip to keep from crying out. 

 

"I tried to call you a billion times last night on my way home," Adam remarked as they got out of the shower. Although it was probably just as well because neither Kris nor Dani needed to worry about the problem since the lawyers should be able to take care of it. "Where were you?"

"Oh. I...uh...lost my phone again," Kris admitted reluctantly, peering up from under the towel he was using to dry his hair. Adam was gonna lecture him about his phone. Again. Which was a better conversation actually than who had come into the bar a few times recently, a topic Adam didn't need to know about quite yet. "I don't get it, actually. I could swear I put it on the bar at work and then I couldn't find it. Then again, maybe I didn't leave it there at all."

"Did you check the refrigerator or the cabinet on the patio?" Adam began, then shut his mouth. He'd been about to lecture Kris about the damn phone but that would have fallen into the "Bossy" category, so he'd be better off not saying it. Besides, he'd said it a million times over the last years and it had done no good.

"You're not gonna lecture me?" Kris asked, hiding his grin at Adam's ill-concealed effort to not say another word.

"Don't taunt me." Glaring at Kris, Adam stomped into the closet and pulled a pair of jeans off of the shelves. "It's not fair of you to taunt me when I'm making an effort." 

"You're right," Kris admitted, watching Adam reach for a shirt as he grabbed for his own clothes. 

"And that effort killlllllllllllls me," Adam complained.

Rolling his eyes, Kris then refocused them on Adam's body. Damn it. He had lost weight on that damn promo tour. He was going to make sure he ate and ate and ate. "And I know that since my email and all that data is on there, I should be more careful."

"It's your bank account, not mine," Adam pointed out, bending over to pull his clothes on. "But reassure me that you haven't taken any pictures of my body parts that I need to know about?"

"Ha!" Kris shook his head and pinched Adam's butt, laughing when he jumped. "Like I want anyone to see the goods that belong to me? I'm not Mr. Perfect, but I am Mr. Private."

"True enough." Adam slid a glance in Kris' direction. He thought he was so sly. "I'm glad of it too, since I'm tired and just want to be at home with the four of us tonight."

Kris pursed his lips and looked at the clock. Uh-oh. He decided to hide his face by shoving his head inside his tee-shirt.

Idly smoothing his shirt out, Adam sighed as deeply as possible. "Really. I"m so glad we're just hanging out here tonight. Just the immediate family. No one else. I'm so tired..." Adam trailed off as he realized Kris was wearing a tee-shirt and nothing else. Now that would be party clothes he could get behind. Oh yeah. 

"Are you that tired, really?" Kris winced when Adam sighed again and nodded.

Gingerly touching the skin under his eyes, Adam said distractedly while watching Kris in the mirror, "Oh hell, yeah. I mean, look at these dark circles under my eyes."

"Dark circles?" Kris peered over at Adam, who had started poking around in...hmm... the glitter drawer? Oh hell, had he made a super bad choice? Because if he'd known edible glitter was on the menu tonight, then... "Well, how can I if you're not looking at me?"

"I meant look in the _rhetorical_ sense." 

"What does that even mean?" Kris hoped Adam didn't hear the note of desperation in his voice.

"It means that you don't have to see with your eyes." Adam turned around and pointed to his eyes, then quickly moved his hand to Kris' chest, patting it. "Your heart -- your connection to me -- tells you everything you need to know. So, of course you know how exhausted I am. After all, aren't you always telling me how I need a vacation? So I know you know."

Swearing under his breath, Kris suddenly froze. Waitaminit. Adam almost never agreed to rest on his own. Not lately anyway. So that meant he was either sick or... "You're scamming me!"

Bursting out laughing and enveloping Kris in a hug, Adam nodded. "Took you a while. Guess those acting classes paid off."

"I was distracted," Kris argued.

"By your own evil plans." Adam smiled. "So I take it we have people coming over for a party? Don't you want to get dressed?"

"Oh!" Kris blushed and took the underwear and jeans Adam handed him. Of course, they were his tightest pair of jeans, which of course he only owned because Adam had bought them. Well, not like he was going to complain about the fact that Adam liked seeing his ass. "Well, everyone's comin' over this afternoon. Everyone including your friends, Geoffrey and Teresa, even Jacob, even everyone's kids. But just for a few hours, because they know you're too busy to actually, you know, _live_ \---"

"I live," Adam protested automatically. Although it had been a while since he'd seen everyone. Maybe Kris and Lane and Dani and no doubt his mother was involved with this, well, maybe, they had a point. He'd think about admitting it... maybe after the Grammy's. They were just a month...or two...or maybe a little more off. 

Kris continued as if Adam had not spoken. "For a Grammy nomination party."

"What does that involve?"

"You'll see!" Kris smiled. They had a karaoke set up filled only with Grammy-nominated songs and costumes and-- "We have a super awesome cake!" Kris told him enthusiastically. 

Adam looked at Kris skeptically. "Let me guess. A dump cake?"

"No." Kris put his hands on his hips and rolled his eyes. "It looks like a real Grammy award. It's totally cool. Scarlett knew somebody who makes these cakes and they are amaaaaaaaaaaazing."

"Okay, sure, cake. But what about--"

"Ice cream? Yes, yes. We have ice cream. In fact, we're having a whole sundae bar. And I don't want to hear one word from you about calories or fat content, got it?"

"Who's the bossy one now? And a sundae bar?" Adam licked his lips. "Now, that's a dessert idea I can get behind. Then again..." He reached over quickly and smacked Kris' ass before sliding his index finger down the cleft of flesh and gently pressing. "Here's another treat I can get behind."

"You just did..." Kris giggled and shoved Adam's hand away. "Now, lissen up, you. It's supposed to be a party, so you gotta act surprised." 

"I can act."

"Ha. I saw through you--"

"Not right away you didn't."

"How did you know, anyway?" Kris hoped he was a good enough actor to pull this off. 

Adam rolled his eyes. "Lane may be your BFF, but she cannot keep a secret from me." He grinned as Kris glared at him while making a grunting sound and smoothed his hand over Kris' hair. His hedgehog. 

"Well, at least Dani can..." Kris mumbled, looking up from under his lashes. 1, 2, 3...

"Excuse me? What secret?"

"It's not really a secret. Just a discussion we've been having between the two of us."

"On what subject?"

"Kids."

"Kids? I don't understand." 

"Kids -- as in ours." 

"Ours? Kids? As in _plural_?" Adam gulped. He'd thought that discussion was done. Apparently he'd thought wrong. Apparently he needed to spend more time at home to nip these crazy ideas in the bud. "Why were you talking with her about it?"

"Because it's obvious -- she'll be the mother."

"It's obvious."

"Of course. We already have Emmaline together. It seems obvious to us that our next child will be one of ours, biologically speaking, as well as from a parenting standpoint. And we really shouldn't wait too long, you know. It's harder for the oldest child to acclimate to a new sibling the older they get." 

"Humph. I never really acclimated."

Kris laughed. "Yeah, but your brother is _Neil_."

"And the same genetics that made him are in my DNA. Do you really want to take a chance that Dani gives birth to a Neil? And we have to raise him?" Adam shuddered.

"Well, I could be the sperm donor, but I also have Neil DNA."

"There's really something about that name..."

"Totally!" Kris nodded, then pulled a quarter out of his pocket. "So I say we flip a coin."

"Flip a coin?" Adam parroted. He shook his head and went back into the bedroom, eager to get away from this conversation. "To determine who will be the sperm donor? That's... wrong."

"Is it?" Kris shrugged and opened a drawer, while he kept talking. "Well, Dani did say as how she thought given your long friendship that you should be the father first, before we have a third baby--"

"THIRD?" Adam yelped.

"Oh yeah. Dani and I think at least three. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. Although..." Kris chortled. "I'm going to get on your head and work it. But if you insist on being first to impregnate your best friend..." He followed Adam into the bedroom, pulled his hand out from behind his back and began waving it.

"That's a turkey baster!" Adam exclaimed, backing up until his legs hit the bed. He flailed around, crying out when Kris slapped his shoulder and pushed him back -- with the hand holding that damn turkey baster. Had. To. Get. Away.

Kris giggled as Adam scrambled back across the bed, his eyes on the turkey baster like it was a flaming pitchfork. "Now, Adam, sweetie. No need to be afraid. This won't hurt a bit!"

"Oh yes, it will!"

"Since when does an orgasm hurt? Or wait-- do you have some sort of... _infection?_ " Kris gasped and put his hand over his chest. "Ohmigod. Did you... cheat on me and pick up some _infection_ from some...twinkslutbag?"

"I.. of course not! How could you think that?" Adam spluttered. "That's crazy!"

"Then why would it hurt?"

"It won't, but--"

"So, it won't hurt. So we should do it. I'll give you a nice hand job." Kris made a wanking motion with his hand, then climbed on the bed, turkey baster held high. "All you have to do is lie there and I'll do all the work. I'll even aim your come into the baster and--" Kris broke off as Adam shrieked and ran into the closet.

 

"Where's Adam?" Dani asked as Kris came down waving his fists in the air triumphantly.

"He's barricaded himself in the closet, so we can finalize plans of Operation Amazing Race now." Kris called out, "Lane, Leila, Neil -- c'mon out here!"

"He could come out at any time to chase you down and make you sorry," Lane pointed out.

Leila rolled her eyes. Kris would love it if Adam chased him. Almost as much as Adam loved it when Kris chased him. Sometimes she thought that the key to them getting together was that Kris had asked Adam out twice in the beginning. 

"Nah. I left the turkey baster right in front of the door. He's ascared of it. He's not goin' nowhere." Kris laughed.

"That was an evil laugh from an evil man," Neil observed. "I approve."

 

"Kris! Your mother's on the phone! The _land line_ in the kitchen. " Leila called out from the patio door. "She said she tried your cell all day, but got nothing. Let me guess. Did you lose your phone again? You really should be more careful with it."

"Sheesh." Kris muttered when Adam burst out laughing.

"Ha. I didn't have to say a word," Adam noted as he watched Emmaline coax Dani and Neil back into the pool now that there were just a few people left at the party.

"Life is occasionally so very satisfying..." Lane drawled with a smug glance at Kris. 

"I know where Adam gets his bossiness from..." Kris glanced meaningfully at Leila as he approached the door. He narrowed his eyes as they adjusted from the glare of the sun reflecting on the pool to the shadowy greyness of the patio.

Leila lightly slapped Kris' ass as he walked past her and laughed when he jumped. "Your mother told me a long time ago that I had her permission to swat your bottom if you needed it."

"Hey, that's my job!" Adam laughed when Kris stuck his tongue out. "You trouble girl!" he exclaimed when Emmaline splashed him with water and took a running leap into the pool to chase after her.

"Hi, Mama!" Kris smiled as he heard Emmaline's loud squeals of laughter like the melody over the harmonies of Adam, Neil and Cale's deeper voices as they... oh god... they were tossing the child around like she was a beach ball. He turned back to the sleek smoothness of the white cabinets in the kitchen. Safer. "Talk to me, Mama." 

"Y'all having a good time at the party? Did you tell Adam congratulations for me? And that I'm so proud of him?" Kim demanded. "Oh, did I pull you away from the party?"

"Slow down!" Kris laughed, shoved the phone between his jaw and shoulder, then pulled pre-washed vegetables out of the refrigerator crisper, laying them out on the counter. "I did tell him what you said. He said, thanks. The party went super. Everyone but our immediate family is gone now, so you didn't interrupt the party itself. It was a gorgeous day, sunny and bright. Almost no smog. It's still hot enough to swim. The karaoke was a huge hit," Kris recited, knowing his mother wanted a list.

"Wish I could've been there," Kim said wistfully. "Send me pictures?"

Kris nodded as he set the phone to speaker mode, set it down, then took out a knife and cutting board and began efficiently chopping. "Lee took pictures and somebody else took video, so I'll send you some stuff in a few days."

"What'd y'all have to eat? I know how that boy of yours love ice cream."

"You got it! We even had a sundae bar and Adam actually ate two bowls of ice cream, which he can stand since he lost weight on this promo trip. Anyways, we did the party backwards. We had cake and ice cream and now we're going to have dinner. Just the immediate family that is. Huh-- I just realized I didn't even eat any ice cream, I was so busy organizing the party with Leila. It was a good thing you called actually, because it reminded me that I needed to start getting the food ready to grill since it's my turn--" Kris froze as his father's voice unexpectedly came on the line. 

"So what are you now? His chief cook and bottle washer? Do you wear a frilly pink apron while you're doing it?" 

Kris looked at his hand and as if watching someone else, saw his hand curl into a fist even as he heard his mother's angry warnings to her husband. He forced himself to look at it, to realize that his body was giving him a visual aid to the hidden hurt of his heart. Then he realized that he'd smashed a green pepper into smushy bits and only then remembered that he'd been in the kitchen, taking his turn at prepping food to grill. Looking at the food on the counter, he felt queasy. He felt that familiar clenching in his stomach. That fear of inadequacy. The darkness that had overtaken not only the bright and fun-filled day, but his soul. He only felt that when his father was talking to him -- in the past or now and...

"MORE!" 

Hearing a shriek, he turned to watch Adam throw Emmaline into the pool, her bright pink swimsuit-clad self sailing through the air into the pool in a cannonball, water exploding everywhere. He heard Emmaline's loud screech of happiness and demands for her "Dadum" to do it again. The joy on her face and that on Adam's as he caught their daughter, swinging her around as she screamed, "Dadum" over and over .... something inside him snapped. He began to yell, only half-cognizant that heads turned toward him as the sound punched through the screen door to the patio. 

"What am I _doing_ now? I'm randomly pounding nails into wood for no apparent reason. Is that _manly_ enough for you?" 

"What-- Don't speak to me like that--"

"Or do I need to pound nails with my _dick_? Would that work?" Kris spat, watching as Adam handed Emmalie off to Lane, jumped out of th pool and approached the screen door as if he were walking up to the tiger enclosure at the zoo. Kris wiggled his fingers, beckoning Adam forward. The relief on Adam's face and the warmth in his own chest told him that pulling Adam closer was the right one.

"Don't talk to me like--"

"Oh I'm gonna talk like that. I'm gonna speak the truth. We're supposed to do that as Christians, we're supposed to confront those who've wronged us. So you're gonna keep quiet and listen to me say me piece. Here's the deal. What I'm really doing is prepping food to cook for my family. It's something I enjoy. Lord knows, they enjoy eating it. We're all happy. Honestly, I cannot imagine being any happier." Kris stopped as Adam halted in front of him and smiled at his words. 

"How, when you don't have a real job. The truth is that you're not a real man--" 

"Oh, screw you. You want the truth? None of what you say matters -- all that crap you give me about getting a real job like a real man. I could be all manly -- and if you didn't know that was in air quotes -- and I could pound nails for a living or dig ditches or shoot 'possum or wrestle fucking alligators and that wouldn't mean a damn thing, would it? Because bottom line, as long as I fuck guys or rather guys fuck me, I'm not a man. All the rest of it is just window dressing, just an excuse for your disapproval of the fact that I'm gay. As long as I take it up the--"

"Kris." Adam stood behind Kris and wrapped him lightly in his arms. Kris had been bright red and the vein in his temple had been pounding so hard Adam was afraid Kris might stroke out. "Take a breath. Center yourself..." 

Closing his eyes and taking that deep breath, inhaling the scent of sun, pool, sunscreen and...Adam, Kris relaxed. He knew what mattered. He knew what he had to do. His mother wasn't going to be happy, but he had to do what was right for him and his little family.

"Kristopher--" Kim began. She put her hand on her throat, knowing she was about to witness the train wreck leading to a dead end that had begun the day they'd thrown their son out of their house. The path had been leading here ever since, she'd tried to avoid it, but it was inevitable. 

"Mama, I'm sorry to tell you, but this is it. I'm done. So..." Kris took a deep breath and felt Adam pressed along his back. Adam, in his literal way, had his back. He could do this. He could do anything, he realized and all the truths he'd wanted to say spilled out in a cathartic hard tumble. " _Neil_ , listen to me--"

"Do not call me by my first name!" Neil ordered. "I am your father. Show me respect."

"Respect? Ha. Be glad that's what I'm calling you, because I could think of other, more descriptive names." Kris froze as he realized that he'd had Emmaline call him "Uncle Kris" instead of "Daddy Kris" was because he associated the word, "Dad" with his father. Oh god, it was so past time to move on. Take his rightful place everywhere. 

"Are you listening to me?" Neil yelled.

"You listen to me. Bottom line is this. One truth I've learned is that it takes way more to be a father than contributing sperm or money or even a ride to baseball practice. A real man is a good father who loves and supports his kids no matter what. And here's another irrefutable truth. I'm gay. I love Adam. Period. Nothing about that's gonna change. I'm not gonna change. I'm never ever gonna wake up one day and go down the conventional path. I'm never gonna wake up and ask out a girl. Or marry her. I'm not--"

"You could if you resisted temptation!"

"Stop it. If I did, it would be for the wrong reasons. I'd be lying to the girl and making false vows before god. Every vow I've ever made to Adam -- I know God witnessed those vows. They are just as true to me as if we'd stood in a church before hundreds and had a reception in the church basement. I have promised to love him and be true to him and be his support forever and so far, I've done it and I intend to keep on doing it forever. And that, _that_ is what makes me a man. Loving people, honoring them, keeping my promises to them." He stopped to draw in a breath and waited.

"You are amazing," Adam whispered into the tense silence, pressing a soft kiss into Kris' neck. "Those words were amazing. Be proud of yourself--"

"I don't have anything to say to you! You're still dead to me!" Neil snapped.

"I can live with that," Kris said instantly, knowing it was the truth. "Mama, I'll talk to you later. Right now, I've got a party with my family here to finish." He depressed the button and threw the phone in the general direction of the counter, then heaved a long sigh and leaned his weight back against Adam's warm body.

"You okay, hedgehog?" Adam asked softly, holding Kris in a loose embrace, bending his head to softly kiss Kris' neck. He held his mouth there, feeling for the pulse. It was pounding, but gradually slowing. "You okay?"

"I... It's over." Turning within the circle of Adam's arms, Kris lifted his head to stare into Adam's eyes. Adam nodded and Kris let out a long breath, then buried his face in Adam's bare shoulder. Needing to touch, he pressed his bare chest against Adam's and entangled their bare legs, rubbing hard. 

"You did great. Now, take your time," Adam urged as he rubbed his hands up and down the skin of Kris' back. Looking up, he saw everyone else standing in the doorway and nodded, urging them to come inside. 

Kris forced himself to take even breaths and counted to the slower beat of Adam's heart until his own calmed to the same pace. Taking a moment once again to listen to that still, small voice, he noted that everyone else had come inside and was crowding around him, touching his back and shoulders, murmuring words of support. Emmaline was holding his leg, squeezing tightly, her higher voice asking him if Coke Man was done being mean. He looked down, then around and smiled. "You know what? I'm good. I did something I've been dreading. Something I knew I needed to do, but was avoiding and now? I feel good." 

"Youse done yelling at Coke Man. He's bad? But you feels good?" Emmaline asked, patting Kris' knee. 

"I do. Emmaline..." Kris bent down until they were eye to eye. "Can you do me a favor?"

"Sure." Emmaline nodded. "Or I _thinks_ sure. You said I hafta be careful of favors like those paps people asking for favors. They'se bad. So. What is it?"

"Can you.." Kris took a breath, then tried again. "Will you call me _Dada_ kiss now?"

"Dadakiss?" Emmaline tapped her foot and looked up at the ceiling, then when Dani nudged her with her knee, giggled. "Sures I can!" She threw her arms around Kris' neck and kissed his cheek. "'Cause youse my dada too!"

"Were you teasing me?" Kris asked, pulling his daughter into his arms and rubbing his cheek over her wet hair. He leaned back, then smiled before covering her cheek with kisses. 

"Yes!" Emmaline giggled as Kris' faint stubble tickled her skin. "Youse always tease me. My turn! _Dadakiss_."

"I'll get you later for that..." Kris promised, blinking his eyes at the sudden moisture. He sniffled when he felt Adam's hand settle a welcome warmth on the base of his neck and turned his head to kiss the palm, smiling when Adam reached up and discreetly wiped away the tears on his cheeks. 

"Good. Let's go back to the pool now!" Emmaline shrieked excitedly.

Giving Kris a careful look, Leila nodded and picked up her granddaughter. Who had had waaaay too much sugar today. "I think that's a fine idea. I bet Cale and Uncle Neil will play with you."

"I call the Super Soaker!" Cale cried as he and Neil took the hint and darted outside. 

Opening the refrigerator, Lane pulled out a beer and handed it to Kris, carefully ignoring how Kris was wiping his eyes on the back of his arm. "It's not tea, but maybe this will soothe your nerves."

"Thanks, Laney." Kris smiled appreciatively and took a long gulp. 

Watching Adam gently stroking Kris' back, Dani smiled as she asked, "Was it as hard as you thought it was going to be?" 

"Not as hard as it was on the chaise lounge earlier..." Kris grinned as Dani giggled and Lane groaned. Putting the beer down, he reached out a hand and stroked down the center of Adam's bare chest, his fingertips automatically dancing along the freckles. "And I have experience knowing how hard that..." He skimmed his fingers along the waistband of Adam's swim shorts. "Can be. Because..." He lifted his head again. "I am a lucky lucky man. I have a wonderful family and friends and my boyfriend is Adam Fucking Lambert!" He winked at Dani and Lane.

"Oh, stop." Adam knew he was blushing, but honestly. At least Kris hadn't done as he'd threatened and put up a poster to keep him company when Adam was away "so much" doing promo. 'And seriously, you need to know that you spoke so well. For all that you were nervous about it, you made perfect sense. You should have no regrets. I mean," he hurried to say. "In my opinion. You obviously can have your own opinion."

Placing his hand over Adam's heart, Kris smiled. "I appreciate hearing your opinion. Actually it was... cathartic," Kris said after a moment's thought. "It felt good. And right. I just laid it all out. And now?" He shrugged and listened again and heard only his heart beating steadily and knew he'd done the right thing. The anxiety was gone and a sense of rightness had taken its place. "I'm done. There's really nothing more to say."

"Well, I have something to say." Dani grabbed Leila's big spoon from the counter and used it as a microphone. "Kris Allen is the winner of this year's award for facing his fears and his asshole sperm donor and coming out on top."

Taking the spoon, Adam held it like an award. "And over here, our Golden Tongue Award winner is none other than our own Kris Allen!" He handed the spoon to Kris. "Give your acceptance speech!"

"Thank you, thanyouvermuch..." Kris mumbled as he took the spoon and cradled it. "I couldn't have done this without my friends and family and oh my manager and let's not forget Jesus. But most of all, I could not have done this without the love of my life who pushed me and supported me and loved me into having enough confidence to confront my fears and move forward. Thank you, Adam Fucking Lambert. Thank you very much." 

"Well. That does deserves a reward." Adam trailed his fingers down Kris' bare back, smiling when Kris giggled happily and the skin around his eyes crinkled, a sign that he was genuinely amused. Thank the gods that Kris seemed to have truly found that diatribe at his father cathartic and not exhausting or depressing. Instead, he looked energized. Hmm. Too bad there were other people in the house. Then again, their bedroom door had a good lock... 

"Oh? Do I get to pick the reward?" Turning, Kris smiled up at Adam, then looked down and up his body. He trailed the spoon down the same path his eyes had taken and laughed when Adam gave him a wary look and moved back. "Because I have some ideas, starting with the fact that I never actually got to have some of that sundae bar and I do believe all of our bowls have been used."

"Oh, have they?" Lane smirked as she saw the avid look on Kris' face. She and Dani exchanged bemused glances. 

"The two of them are sweeter than the ice cream. I feel a cavity forming while I'm watching them." Dani groaned, hiding her smile. Adam had always wanted a one-and-only love and he'd found it and kept it. She was so glad for him. 

Lane laughed as she watched the two men whisper and touch each other's skin like it was still something new. They'd been captivated by each other all those years ago in a coffee shop and nothing had changed. "We all may end up with caps on our teeth."

"It's good then that we're living in America, where we actually have dentists, unlike England," Kris teased back automatically, then just as automatically jumped away, anticipating Lane's poke at him. "So I can eat as much ice cream as I want as my reward." Taking a step back, he reached for the freezer and pulled out a tub of ice cream, then grabbed Adam's hand with the other. "C'mon. I know what my reward is gonna be." 

"Don't you need a spoon?" Lane called out. 

"I don't need no stinkin' spoon." Kris grinned. "That golden tongue of mine is gonna do its job."


	53. Hither and  yon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks
> 
> The St. Louis airport really is the Lambert St. Louis Airport.

**Chapter 53: Hither**

"Lane! I think my phone is broken or something!" Adam yelled as he roamed around his house, wondering where everyone was. Lane had asked him to meet her here and now where was she? "My schedule is empty and I remember quite clearly that I had two interviews tomorrow morning alone and --"

_Beep_

Seeing Kris' face smling up at him from his phone screen, Adam anwered immediately. "Hedgehog, where are you?" He began to frown as he realized he was listening to a recorded message.

 _"Your mission should you choose to accept it is to do what I tell you. Well, actually you can't choose not to accept it because I'm using my get out of jail free card for bossing_ you _around. Yup, I'm callin' it in. Okay, go ahead, yell and scream for Lane, but that's not gonna change anything. Deal is, I'm giving you coordinates in the text message I am sending you while you are listening to this message and -- Ha! Bet you thought I couldn't be this devious, didn't you? Ha! Anywaaay... So. It's geocaching. Our thing. Well, outside of sex. And music. And, well, anyway... Look at my text message and then go to the coordinates and then you'll find out what's goin' on. But the adventure's gonna start right now. Do it right now. Got it? Good. Love ya."_

Having come to a stop in front of the glass doors overlooking the pool, empty pool -- seriously, where was everyone? -- Adam paused as he caught his reflection in the glass. He was grinning like a fool, which was the effect Kris had on him, still after all these years. And oh crap, he was sending him on a geocaching adventure? Without him? This made no sense whatsoever, but it probably did to Kris, so he'd do it, but day-um, his schedule and oh, that was probably why his schedule had disappeared. Lane and Kris were always in cahoots. "LANE!"

_Beep_

Pressing the button for his text messages, Adam smiled as he looked at the coordinates, then frowned. He was no cartographer, so it was no surprise that he didn't know where it was. He could look it up, of course, or... "LANE!" he yelled. "I know you're here. Come out, come out, wherever you are!"

"Front door!"

"What the hell?" Adam muttered as he retraced his steps toward the foyer. Lane was indeed standing there, tapping her foot and looking like he'd forgotten something. "Okay, this is unfair. I never forget a work meeting, so why the frown and..." He stopped when he noticed Lane was just tapping her foot, which was next to a suitcase... "Oh hell, you're not quitting. No, no, no. Lane, you can't quit. I neeeeed you. I love you and..." Adam paused as he saw the amusement in Lane's eyes. "You're not quitting, are you?"

"No."

"Laney, what's going on?"

"Here." Lane handed Adam a padded envelope and pointed toward a small suitcase at her feet. "Go."

"You're only speaking to me in monsyllabic words now?"

"No." Lane slapped the envelope against Adam's chest. "Passport."

Adam blinked, then laughed. "Okay. Two syllables and... I'm going out of the country."

"Bloody genius."

"Ooooh! Two words of two syllables. I bet you're breaking all sorts of rules that Kris -- who now thinks he's devious, which is so utterly ridiculous I can't even..."

**Bang**

The loud knock on the door stopped Adam's mocking tirade. "Is that the big bad wolf or what?" He asked Lane, who shrugged, but was obviously hiding a grin. "Okay. I guess _I'll_ answer it." Adam flung open the door, then stepped back as his mother entered, shoving her hands against his chest.

"Is there some reason you're not following directions and waiting outside?" Leila demanded, hoping she was capable of hiding her amusement. 

"Well, I..." Adam began.

"Let me guess, Lane. He was arguing with you," Leila surmised, crossing her arms.

Lane crossed her arms and nodded. "Trying."

"Oh!" Adam nodded. "That's why you're not really talking. So I can't argue with you."

"You could argue with a bloody post!" Lane exploded. "I knew that. That's why I called in your mother."

"Uh-oh..." Adam muttered then turned to his mother with a sheepish smile. "I'm in trouble. What did I do?"

"Don't give me that smile. It's not going to work. Did you even think about taking that vacation we all asked you to take?"

"Well, I've been--"

"Don't want to hear it. Get in the car!" Leila ordered, taking one of Adam's arms while Lane took the other, grabbing the small case with her other hand. They pulled him forward toward a black car, a driver standing outside it.

"A car?" Adam asked, "Well, that's obvious, you don't need to answer-- Hey!" He squawked as the driver opened the door and Lane and his mother pushed him inside the back seat. "Are you two kidnapping me?" Adam asked, still laughing as Lane and his mother both clambered in after him.

"You are my kid and you do need a nap, so yes." Leila pointed at Adam. "Buckle your seat belt."

"Are we in for a bumpy ride?"

"You are, if you don't do as you're told," Leila warned him. "Just buckle up."

"So I'm going somewhere. But... Lane, what did you pack for me?" Adam asked suspiciously eyeing the size of that suitcase sitting between Lane and his mother.

"You have your sunglasses, right?" Leila asked, not answering the question.

"Yes, right here..." Adam patted his chest, where they rested, hooked over the top of his shirt.

Leila asked, "And Lane -- you cleared his schedule?"

"Yes. yes." Lane nodded.

Leila turned to Adam. "Then you're good to go."

"But--"

"Don't want to hear it." Leila shook her head. "Be quiet."

"But--"

"Adam Mitchell Lambert!" Leila remonstrated, digging around in her oversized purse and pulling out a large metal spoon. Holding it up, she asked, "Do I need to use the spoon on you?"

"No, ma'am." Adam sat back in his seat and pressed his lips together. For a long time. Surely he deserved something for being quiet for so long. He opened his mouth and then seeing the glint in his mother's eyes, closed it. After watching the streets and realizing they were headed to LAX, so that must have been the coordinates and he didn't need to look them up very much, Adam began, "We're going to LAX. So is that the last set of coordinates Kris will send me?"

Lane and Leila looked at each other. Lane shook her head.

"I feel like I'm in an episode of Alias or something. Did Kris tell you that we met Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck again at one of Geoffrey's parties? Nicest couple. But if you were going to try and confuse me while kidnapping me, you would should've used that guy...what was his name... Sark? Yeah. He was pretty cute and OW!" Adam yelped as his mother struck his knee with the spoon. "What was that for?"

"You're babbling. Which means you're either nervous or excited or over-tired. Just relax and let someone else be in charge for once."

"Over-tired?" Adam glared at his motther. "I am not a toddler in need of a nap."

"No. You're an over-worked man in need of a vacation."

"Indeed." Lane took the spoon from Leila and slapped Adam's other knee.

"Ow!" Adam rubbed his knees. "What was that for?"

"For not listening to us before. Plus, Kris went to a lot of trouble to set this up and you shouldn't be talking about another guy."

"Whaaaat?" Adam gaped at Lane. "I'm not... It was a joke... I... What?" He laughed. "I don't ... Kris is the love of my life. Brad was teasing me the other day that we are the oldest married couple he knows, including his grandparents who are in their eighties, given how he couldn't get me to tell him fantasies about other guys."

"TMI." Leila sighed.

Adam smiled smugly. "Oh, yeah. Well, anyway, I might look, but I don't, I would never ever cheat on Kris and you have to know that. Now, I'm offended." Adam crossed his arms and looked out the window.

"I apologize, Adam," Lane said softly. "I know how much you love Kris."

"You better." 

'Then act like he's special to you. Pay him attention," Leila suggested.

"I do!" Adam protested. "I went out to Arkansas!" When Leila continued staring at him implacably, he slumped. "Okay, that didn't work out so well, but I tried. Right, Laney?"

"Well, yes," Lane agreed, reaching out to pat Adam's hand. Adam did look distressed and he did love Kris. "I have to say your intentions were the best -- as were mine. Even if Kris doesn't see it that way."

"I know, right?"

Leila swore under her breath. Lane was starting to lose focus, a common affliction around Adam, especially when he was using the puppy dog eyes. She snapped her fingers at Adam. "Adam, that was months ago."

Glaring at his mother who had thwarted his efforts to win over Lane, Adam sighed. "Okay. I get it. He wants attention. I need to take time off and pay him attention. You're right. I don't want to lose him."

"It's more than that, sweetie." Leila reached out to pat Adam's knee, smiling when he flinched. A little fear wasn't necessarily a bad thing. "You're not going to lose Kris. I don't think, anyway." She paused, then relenting, added, 'That boy is besotted with you, but don't take it for granted -- that's the biggest mistake people in long-term relationships make, in my opinion."

"Oh." Adam nodded. "Thanks for the advice." He guessed that given he was going to the airport, he'd have time en route to wherever those coordinates were to think about his mother's advice. "And Lane, don't you have some pearls of wisdom for me?"

"You need to find balance in your life. Not just with Kris and not just for all the people you love. But for _you._ It's been months since you talked my ear off about astrology! Or non-work clothes."

"Really?" Adam frowned."That's wrong."

"So, we're helping Kris give you a time out to think about balance, to recharge..." Leila smiled. "And here we are."

"Where are we? This isn't the regular entrance." Adam looked around curiously.

"It's for private planes."

"I don't own a private plane. Do I?" Adam rubbed the back of his neck. "I'll concede that I'm overbooked, but I'd remember if I bought a private plane. They cost the earth. Which is an ironic comment given that the job of planes is to leave the earth and..." Adam paused as he realized his mother and Lane were staring at him. "I'm babbling again." 

"You need a rest and you're going to get it." Lane pointed towards the security official. "Okay, take your suitcase. Remember -- _you_ packed it."

"I know the rules." Adam picked up the suitcase, which was surprisingly heavy for its size. "What's in here?"

"Everything you're going to need." Lane smirked. 

"How about --"

"And nothing more. You do not need your jewelry box or five different pairs of half-gloves. You need something else."

"Where the hell am I going that I don't need my jewelry?" Adam asked suspiciously. "The ends of the earth?" 

"No. St. Louis," Lane blurted out.

"St. Louis? I was right -- that is the ends of the earth! It's the midwest!" 

A male voice interjected. "Indeed, Mr. Lambert. Here's the currency you'll need to deposit for the next set of coordinates."

Adam twirled around and took a step back as the man before him extended his hand. 

"It's fine," Lane told him quickly. "Bloody hell, you're jumpy. The pilot is just trying to give you one of those little trinkets you and Kris use in geocaching."

"Oh, a doubloon?" Adam smiled in relief as he recognized the glint of the cheap plastic Dollar Store trinket in the man's hand. "Sorry, I guess I am a little grumpy." He took the doubloon from the pilot and turned it over, looking at it. "How does this work?"

Lane looked at her phone. "You should have a text from Kris explaining it."

Adam sighed. "He's really enjoying this, the little shit."

"Mr. Lambert, if you're ready, we should board the plane and get airborne." The pilot pointed towards the plane.

"I don't own this plane, do I?" Adam asked worriedly. 

"Mr. and Mrs. Affleck own the plane."

"That little..." Adam shook his head. Huh. Kris could be devious. That was... disturbing. No, it was fine. Kris was Kris. Totally trustworthy little hedgehog whose ass he was going to beat as soon as he saw him. 

The pilot explained, "Mr. Allen and Mrs. Affleck both felt it was an excellent way for you to be able to leave without others being apprised of your plans." 

"So, no one besides the crew knows that I'm going to..." Adam trailed off.

"The sooner you board the plane, the sooner you'll know," Lane pointed out.

"Sure." Adam nodded, then turned back to Lane and his mother. "Okay, hug me before I set off for middle America, where I will probably disappear, never to be seen again, probably arrested for wearing nailpolish or--"

"Goodbye, sweetheart. Have a great time," Leila interrupted, knowing Adam could carry on forever if he wanted. She reached up and hugged him.

"Laaaaaane?" Adam whined.

"Buck up and all that rot," Lane quipped. She patted Adam on the back. "You'll have a great time. Believe me. If what Kris wanted me to pack is any indication, anyway."

"Now, you've got me curious." 

"You're not supposed to open it until you get there. Kris' rules--"

"Yeah, not so good at following rules." Adam shrugged. 

"Be that as it may, Mr. Lambert." The pilot began walking. "We do have to follow FAA rules and I filed our flight plan to leave in thirty minutes, which means you must leave now."

"Fine. Mom, Lane." Adam sighed. Loudly. "Promise you'll answer when I call from jail in St. Louis."

"What a drama queen today," Lane muttered as she and Leila walked away.

"I know. Poor boy does need a vacation."

 

**And**

 

"So. Mr. Lambert..." The police officer threw down Adam's passport and leaned over the table. "You want to explain again why you were seen poking around other people's luggage and under seats?" He glared. "Did you think you owned the airport since it's the Lambert St. Louis Airport and that gave you the right to --"

"I'm not delusional!" Adam protested. 

"Really? Then why were you found at a gate clutching a--" The agent pointed to the table.

"A doubloon. It's a doubloon."

"What's a doubloon?"

"Pirate booty."

"Is that some guy from the Village People?"

"No. It's pirate _money_. Spanish doubloons. You know, pirates would seize a Spanish ship and steal their gold doubloons."

"I know that."

"Then why were you asking?" Adam snapped. "We've been at this for over an hour and my story isn't going to change since it's, you know, the _truth_." 

"I wanted to see if you were delusional."

"Right now, I wish this were all a delusion." Adam sighed and looked at the clock on the wall. Time was wasting. Time he could have spent getting closer to Kris. Who was soooooo going to owe him. So much. 

"So tell me again why you had this doubloon?"

"Given that I'm sure you've already x-rayed it or whatever it is you do to it, you must know it's just a piece of plastic crap. A party favor." Adam took a deep breath and tried to explain it. Again. "My boyfriend and I use it for our geocaching hobby. It's our...thing. You look for caches -- boxes -- using coordinates. When you find the cache, you can take a souvenir out of it as long as you replace it. We always use doubloons."

"Money."

"No. It symbolizes money. But it's a piece of plastic."

"Is it money to pay for... what exactly?" 

"My boyfriend's ass!" Adam exclaimed impatiently. 

"Is that why you have this..." The agent held the object up between the thumb and index finger of a gloved hand and wrinkled his nose. "In your suitcase?"

 

Laying the more nondescript sex toys out on the bed, Kris grinned. He hadn't wanted to take the obvious stuff on the commercial flight, but since Adam was going on a private plane, he could bring along whatever he wanted -- or rather, whatever Kris wanted him to. Kris wished he could've seen Adam's face when he opened the suitcase. Because he knew Adam would never follow directions and keep the suitcase closed until he got to his destination. That bright pink dildo must've cracked Adam up.

 

Adam covered his mouth with his hand and then gave up and began laughing. The look on the agent's face was too too funny. Probably more funny than the look on his own face when he'd seen it. Kris, that little shit. "It's a dildo. Silicone."

"Silicone. Why?"

"Because it feels more... real."

"Really?" The agent flopped the dildo around.

"Well, not in hardness." Adam looked up as he caught sight of the red light in the corner. "Are you taping this? I don't think I want my mom to see that. Then again, _I'm_ not the one playing with a bright pink dildo." 

The agent dropped the dildo.

Adam laughed. 

"This is a serious matter, Mr. Lambert!"

"Tell me about it. I've been delayed in getting to my boyfriend for a vacation that apparently involves a whole lotta lube." 

 

 

"Oh my god..." Leila moaned and dropped her face into her hands. "I can't believe this! And we told him not to look into his suitcase, so he's not going to know..."

"Wellllll...." Lane smiled. Or made her best Girl Guide effort to do so. "You must know he looked."

"Oh. Of course." Leila slumped in relief for a moment. She swore that every grey hair on her head that she dutifully covered every four weeks was due to her eldest son. How such a sweet boy could end up in so much trouble so often was a mystery. "Adam never follows directions."

Defending Adam, Lane argued, "And thank god for that!" 

 

__

_"What's in my suitcase?" Adam muttered to himself as he opened the locks. "I hope Lane packed my good black half-gloves, because they're always.... What. The. Hell? No wonder the TSA guys were smirking. Geez!" He snatched his phone off of the seat next to him and impatiently fidgeted in his seat until Lane answered._

_"Yessssss?"_

_"Lane? Why is my suitcase full of sunblock and lube? JUST sunblock and lube? And a few ridiculous sex toys?"_

_"All. You. Need."_

_"We're back to monosyllabic conversation?" Adam chortles. "Ha. It thrills me that you're so afraid of me."_

_"Wanker." Lane grinned and relented. "Kris has everything else. Including a hat that does not look like your grandfather wore it yesterday. At the retirement home. In Boca."_

 

"This is ugly! This is a pr disaster!" Jacob hissed into the phone. "Brush, why didn't you tell me that Kris set up--"

"I'm sure once people know the truth--"

"Truth? What does truth have to do with reporting or pr? Oh for godssakes! Turn on E! Look at the feed on the bottom!"

"Hold on..." Geoffrey picked up the remote just as he heard Hannah scream from the outer office. "What... Oh no!"

"Yeah." Jacob slumped into his office chair as he stared at his computer screen as an image -- obviously from a cell phone video -- streamed with the graphic screaming.

**POPSTAR ADAM LAMBERT ARRESTED FOR DOMESTIC TERRORISM!**

"He wasn't arrested." Hannah exclaimed as she ran to the doorway. "He was just detained for questioning. So E! has technically made a fallacious and defamatory statement."

Geoffrey nodded. "Get me the head of E! News. And Ryan Seacrest."

Jacob interjected, "Do you want to issue a general statement? I'd advise it--"

"Bloody hell yeah!" Geoffrey snapped.

"Do you want me to write it or will you?" Jacob asked, already knowing the answer. Geoffrey had a well-deserved reputation for being a hands-on manager. 

"Issue a press release that Adam's management immediately stated that Adam Lambert being mentioned in connection with any form of terrorism is a preposterous idea and that we look forward to the speedy resolution of what is obviously a terrible misunderstanding."

 

"Do you know what you use this for?" The agent held up a tube.

"Lube?" Adam stared at the tube, then at the agent. Was this some sort of trick question?

"Yes!" The agent stared down at Lambert. Lambert looked confused, but nothing the agent had ever heard about the singer had indicated he was stupid. Maybe he'd been drugged or had taken drugs. "What do you use it for?" he pressed. 

"Well. Okaaaaay." Adam held his hands up. He'd asked. "You squeeze it out onto your hand. Usually. Then you spread it on your dick and--"

"That's not what I meant!"

"Well, then I don't know what you mean, because _that's_ what you use lube for!" Adam glared back. "Unless you use lube for something...really weird that I can't even imagine. And I have a good imagination. Especially when it comes to sex." 

"So. You're trying to tell me that you were poking around seats and counters and people's luggage looking for a geocaching box and you have all this lube..." The agent flicked his fingers distastefully over the mound of lube tubes in Adam's small suitcase. "So you can go on vacation with your boyfriend and have sex?"

"YES! Like I said, I don't know what else you'd use lube for!"

"As I've said countless times now..." The agent blew out a long breath. "You must be aware of the reason for the rules governing transportation of liquids and gels on board aircraft."

"Yeah. Something to do with blowing stuff up. But if you think I have any clue about how you use lube to do anything other than coat your dick or your fingers or an orifice, then you have a flattering but _totally_ unfounded estimation of my understanding of chemistry." 

 

"They think Adam is a terrorist?" Neil laughed incredulously as he ended the call with his mother and turned to his father. "Didn't he fail chemistry in high school?"

"No." Eber shook his head. "Science and math weren't his strong suit, but he didn't fail. Nonetheless, he's hardly interested in mixing anything other than a drink. But what was he doing, poking around the St. Louis airport?"

Neil nodded. "Kris is leading him on a scavenger hunt using their geocaching hobby. Normally, they leave a doubloon in the box, but apparently this time Adam is getting doubloons that he needs to turn into Kris or something to get what he wants..." 

"What?"

"I know, right?" Neil shuddered. "They're really repellently cute, aren't they? So anyway, the coordinates led him to that location inside the airport, probably because Kris thought it would be easy and quick since he was in a plane. Problem was, Adam couldn't find the damn box." 

"Are you telling me this is all over Adam getting doubloons -- like fake, plastic things you'd buy at Party City? So he and Kris can play a scavenger hunt game?"

"That's what I'm saying!" When his father kept staring at him, Neil shrugged. "Only Adam could have someone think his totally dorky and nauseatingly cute couple's game is a sign of domestic terrorism."

 

"I told you. I was trying to find my cache!" Adam explained for what must be the millionth time. "The coordinates only provide you with a kind of general location. It's give or take twenty feet or so. And I had to find the cache to find the coordinates for the next destination. And get my doubloon."

"For this surprise vacation with your boyfriend at a surprise destination of which you are unaware?"

"Yes. That's why it's called a _surprise_." 

 

Humming happily as he took a step back and examined the bed, Kris turned to the small cabinet. Adam was going to be so surprised... 

 

"And how long were you planning on vacationing with your boyfriend?"

"I. Don't. Know. My boyfriend apparently planned this couple's vacation, in cahoots with my personal assistant and my mom. I was just instructed to get on the plane and follow directions. If you want to know how long I'll be on vacation, call them." 

"We did. They said a week."

"Well, then, the lube is for a week."

"That much lube for one week?!" The agent asked incredulously. "That's unbelievable."

"Maybe in your experience. But not in mine." Adam smirked.

 

Kris bounced up and down on his toes. He couldn't wait for Adam to get here. They were going to have a great time. Adam was going to relax. They were going to have lots of sex. Lots and lots of sex. Adam should've made it to Panama by now. Unless he got delayed somewhere. Hope not. He couldn't wait to get this private party rolling. 

 

 

"Ryan, it's Geoffrey Brush... No, I'm _no_ t calling about your invitation to a Valentine's Day party. That's two months away and so much can happen between now and then. Allow me to make myself perfectly clear. Either you do whatever it is you have to do and if that includes giving a blowjob to your boss, I. Don't. Care. But you will ensure that the defamatory headline on the E! feed is removed immediately or I'll make sure that E! has no access to any of the performers in my stable. Are we clear?" 

"You pulling a Pat Kingsley?" Ryan asked, prevaricating as he referred to Tom Cruise's former publicist, even as his assistant frantically handed him a sheaf of notes.

"Why not? She was able to keep the lid on Tom Cruise's craziness for years with that strategy. I have no problem stealing an idea as long as it works. And it will work, Ryan, I assure you. Right now, Hannah is on the phone pulling--"

"Yes, I know. My assistant just gave me a note. Or two." Ryan shook his head. "Does Adam realize how lucky he is to have you in his corner?"

"He bloody well better. Just do it." Geoffrey flung his phone across the desk and stared at Hannah. "Good job."

"So. What do you think Adam is saying right now?"

"The mind boggles." Geoffrey shuddered. "Especially since Adam's playing a game according to Kris' rules and doesn't know the outcome."

Hannah stared and shook her head. "What does that mean?"

"It means..." Geoffrey sighed. "Kris was trying to play a romantic game with that geocaching hobby of theirs. I think..." He reached for his phone. "You ring Lane. I'll ring Kris. He's going to make a video statement which we will release."

"Kris is not going to like that."

"The fuck I do not give is smaller than you can possibly imagine." 

Hannah laughed. "I'll get Lane. And you might want to tell Kris to wear one of his plaid shirts. That's an all-American-I'm-a-nice-small-town-boy-look that should play well." 

 

"Why don't you have any clothes in this suitcase?"

"To make room for the sunblock and lube."

"So... you're going to have a naked vacation?"

"I live in the hope." Adam ran his hand through his hair and hoped he wasn't sweating. 

"And where you going?"

"As I said before... I don't know. It's a mystery vacation. That's why I was looking for my geocaching cache. Cache, you know? Little box. My boyfriend is making me pick up clues to tell me where to go and I don't know the final destination."

"Like Amazing Race?"

 

"Umm... well..." Lane bit her lip. "That might be a wee bit of a problem."

"What is the problem?" Hannah growled. "Why can't Geoffrey reach Kris?"

"Kris is somewhere without cell phone reception." Lane brightened. "However, I know how to reach someone who can find him. I hope."

"Well, then why are you still talking to me? Do it." Hannah hung up.

"Do it..." Lane mimicked. "God, what a bitch. Like it's that easy!" 

 

"So, Mr. Lambert." The agent closed the door and leaned against it. "I've reviewed the interviews you suggested. On YouTube. On which you have approximately a million videos."

"And..."

"Yes. I did see two interviews in which you talk about your geocaching hobby with your boyfriend."

 

"Lane said you want me to make a video? Because somehow that will deflect from this ridiculous story? And you want me to wear a plaid shirt?" Kris asked in confusion. "But Adam hates plaid--"

"You're not trying to make Adam happy," Hannah explained while gritting her teeth.

"Are you gritting your teeth?"

"Yes!" Hannah growled. "I do not know why Adam hasn't strangled you."

"Because he looooooooooves me."

"Well, I--" 

"Give me that phone, if you will." Geoffrey held his hand out. "Kris, let me explain this to you again. You're trying to make him look good."

"How is my wearing plaid going to make him look good?"

"Because it will make you not look like a terrorist."

"But if a terrorist wanted to look like normal, like an average joe, wouldn't they _choose_ to wear plaid?"

"You're over-thinking this. And you're just as bloody stubborn as Adam!"

"Not even remotely possible. Speaking of which..." Kris took a breath, then continued. "Also impossible is me wearing plaid. I didn't bring any plaid with me on vacation."

"Of course, you didn't!"

"Adam hates plaid. I'm not going to wear something he hates when I'm trying to give him this perfect vacation as a gift--"

"Then you might have wanted to choose to hide that geocaching box other than in an airport! And in a place he couldn't find it."

"What are you talking about? I hid it in plain sight, the way we always do. I don't even know why he didn't find it right away. I mean, I wanted him to find it, why would I make it impossible?"

"Where exactly did you hide it? And did anyone see you do it?"

"I... Uh-oh..." Kris groaned. 

 

**Yon**

 

"I'm so disappointed." The agent sighed and looked over at his female colleague.

She grinned. "Me too. I was really hoping we'd crack the plot in which Adam Lambert and his cute little boyfriend were involved in a long con against the American people for which they laid the ground work more than five years ago when they went on their first geocaching expedition, followed by Lambert evidencing little to no interest in international relations, then over-working himself to the point where his staff and family _pushed_ him onto a plane so he could go on a vacation, all to plant an incendiary device in an airport with the same name. Because you know, that wouldn't be obvious." She shrugged. "I mean, it's just _so_ likely. And so incredibly subtle, it's actually a red flag. I'm surprised the FBI in LA didn't realize their nefarious plan years ago."

"People do pull long cons!" The agent protested.

"Yes, they do. If they're fanatics. Speaking of which..." She raised her eyebrows. "Go in and tell Lambert the good news." 

**Bang**

Adam jerked his head up when the agent slammed the door behind him with what had to be unnecessary force. "What now? Am I singlehandedly responsible for a tornado or something?" 

"You're in luck, Mr. Lambert."

" _Good_ luck?" Adam said cautiously.

"Is that another joke?"

"Not really." 

"A worker at one of the food kiosks came forward with your little box."

"Whaaat? Someone had it?" Adam winced as he heard his voice go a little higher than dogs could hear. "So I wasn't stupid or crazy for not being able to find it! Ha! Hahahahaha!"

"Yes. Apparently she saw your boyfriend's video."

"Kris made a video? When? Where? Why?"

"Yes. He made a video and told his story about hiding it for this little scavenger hunt game and how you're not a terrorist, just a guy looking for his directions."

"Oh god. And wait -- there's a video, music video, idea in that. Hmm..."

"Mr. Lambert! The video in question?"

"Yes? What was it like? Can I see it?"

"My colleague told me she thought it was..." The agent's mouth twisted. "Sweet."

"Awww. Kris _is_ sweet." Adam beamed. "Even if he got me into this mess."

"Technically, _he_ didn't."

 

_  
"Hi, I'm Felice?"_

_"Are you asking me?" The agent looked at the nervous young woman with her hair parted in the middle and holey jeans like some left-over hippie and frowned. "Why is this girl wasting my time."_

_"She's not. She's just a teenager who works at the chicken stand in the food court, but she has the goods. Listen up!" The agent's partner snapped impatiently. They had wasted everyone's time with this Lambert nonsense. The guy obviously had no idea what they were looking for and asking him to prove his innocence was impossible. "Listen and learn. Felice, tell him what happened. Show him."_

_Felice nodded, biting her lip. She slowly pulled her hands from behind her back and showed them a small, black box. "This is Adam's box. I... I took it."_

_"You what? From where? When? Why?" The agent snapped. "What's in it?"_

_"Wellllll...." Felice started to shake. "It was under the counter of the chicken restaurant I work at? There was a magnet on the side and Kris stuck it there? I saw him?"_

_"What was in it?"_

_"I didn't open it, I wouldn't!"_

_"Cut the crap, young lady."_

_"Okay." Felice sniffled, then wiped her eyes. "I did open it. I was wrong. My mom says I'm in big trouble for opening someone else's present." She flipped open the box. "See? It's still there, though. There was a note with numbers on it and a plastic gold coin..."_

_The agent sighed. "A doubloon."_

_"Yeah, I guess. Like from Pirates of the Caribbean? Johnny Depp is hot, but not as hot as Adam. Kris is cute too, though." Felice nodded._

_Forcing himself to patience and to ignore his smugly smirking colleague, the agent asked behind gritted teeth, "What. About. Kris?_

_"Kris... well, I recognized him."_

_"Why?" The agent snapped. "What do you know?"_

_"Calm down, cowboy." The other agent rolled her eyes. "She's a teenage girl, a fan. It's their hobby to know everything. Listen to her." She smiled encouragingly at the teen. "Go on."_

_"Okay, so, well, okay? I'm a huge fan of Adam's and I know Kris and his mom and his brother and his father and Lane and his band and his ex-boyfriend and well, everyone!" Felice explained in a rush. "So I was totally stoked when I took this guy's order and realized it was Kris Allen and so I asked him if Adam was here because they're always together since they have this rule like that they try not to be apart for like more than three days, so it seemed like Adam could be here, you know? I thought maybe he was in the bathroom, but I couldn't follow him in there? And I asked if I could I have his autograph and I guess I was just babbling--"_

_"Imagine that."_

_"And he laughed and said Adam wasn't here, that they were playing their geocaching game, which I know about because Adam mentioned it in two interviews, one with a radio station in Philadelphia and one with a magazine in Canada and do you need those interviews, because I totally have them on my iTouch and --"_

_"We've seen them."_

_"Oh good? Well, anyway, so Kris -- who was super friendly and really sweet, by the way, totally see why Adam loves him -- said that they were playing this game and he was kinda worried about janitorial seeing the box because it would totally suck if the box got lost--"_

_"Yeah. He was right."_

_"Stop..." Felice wiped the tears away again. "Don't be so mean. I didn't mean for all this to happen!" she wailed._

_"It's okay. We know that, Felice," the other agent said soothingly. "Keep going. "So Kris asked and could I keep my eye on it since Adam should be here in a few hours, if I was still working that was and I said yes. I asked him if Adam would give me an autograph and he said he would? So. Well, then I was on my lunch break and I was afraid janitorial was gonna take it, so I took it -- for safekeeping, you know--"_

_"Surrrre." The agent looked at his colleague. He doubted the girl had taken it to keep it safe; she had probably taken it to ensure her chance to meet the singer._

_"So I took it and then when I got back, my boss said we were overstaffed and I should go home and I did and then when I got home, my mom said my gay boyfriend -- that's what she calls Adam, you know -- well, she said that he'd been arrested for domestic terrorism, which is just stooooopid and I couldn't figure out how that would happen."_

_"Why is that stupid?"_

_"Because Adam's a cupcake of a person! Plus he sang the Star Spangled Banner at that baseball game, so he's American, you know? Anyway. So I got on Facebook with my friends and we were trying to figure it out and then I heard Kris had a video and I watched it and then..." Felice took a breath. "Realized I had the box that could probably prove that poor Adam -- and I hope you've been treating him good because the Glamberts are nothing to mess with, you guys -- was innocent and so here I am. Simple, right?"_

 

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Adam asked, then began to laugh. "All of that, all of this..." He gestured from the agent to the clock and back again. "Just.." 

"Just so she could meet you." 

"Maybe I should do more meet and greets." Adam shook his head and stood up. "I take it I'm free to go now. Unless you think she's part of this long con that Kris and I rigged up years ago."

"Yes, everything did check out. No harm done."

"No harm done?" Adam shouted. "I'm late, I"m late for a very important date! And where's my damn box?"

"The...uh girl still has it. My colleague thought maybe you could see this girl because she's been crying the last hour over it." The agent shrugged. "I think it's ridiculous, so if you want me to tell her to get her ass back to her mother, I can do that. I...uh... owe you. Maybe."

"I...I'll see the girl, then I want to get the hell out of here!" Adam walked towards the door. "I want my phone and my wallet. I want to see the video. I can't wait to see it. How, where--"

"He posted it on the Twitter thing --"

"Kris seriously posted a Twitvid? Kris Allen? My boyfriend?"

"Is there some reason you're shocked?" The agent asked, once again suspicious.

"Yeah. Kris hates publicity and gossip and anything vaguely like entertainment reporting."

"Well, this isn't strictly entertainment reporting since violations of airport security rules is a violation of federal law and national security regulations."

"Yeah, me and my Astroglide are the biggest dangers facing this country." Adam rolled his eyes. "Speaking of which, I want my suitcase of lube back."

 

"He needs to just get here." Kris rubbed his sweaty palms on his legs, cradling the phone between his shoulder and ear. "Forget the game."

"Okay, so tell me the coordinates. And wait-- tell me where you put all the boxes so I can retrieve them before some other fans get the bright idea to go looking for them."

"Okay. I'll text them to you." Hissing out a long breath, Kris wiped his forehead. "I can't believe... I'm so sorry. Is he pissed?"

"I haven't seen him yet because we're still waiting for him to be processed, but oh please. It wasn't your fault." Lane laughed. "The agent -- the good agent, because apparently they were into playing that dreadful good cop, bad cop routine. She told me that they initially thought the two of you were running a long con. Which is so ridiculous. The two of you are so transparent, it's like looking through a double glaze window."

"Yeah," Kris said absently. "Shit, you know? I was going to tell Adam this... secret--"

"You mean about the deal?"

"Damn it, Lane." Kris kicked the wall in front of him, then winced. Kicking a wall with bare feet wasn't his brightest idea. "Everything's going to hell."

 

"Geoffrey? Mom? Lane? Dani?" Adam stared as he exited the security area. What the hell was going on? "Jacob. Am I dead? Is... ohmigod, is the St. Louis airport actually purgatory? Ohmigod, I died and now I'm stuck in this bizarro purgatory thing even though I'm Jewish? Is this because I didn't keep kosher? Or even finish Hebrew School? Who knew my greatest mistake was not finishing Hebrew School? And ooof!" He grunted as his mother threw herself at him, hugging him tightly as Lane embraced them both and Geoffrey patted his shoulder. Even Jacob was patting his arm. "Just tell me the truth. How did I die and oh no... Why are you all here? Did you die too?" 

"Are you okay?" Leila asked, pulling back to stare at Adam. She raised her hands to cup his cheek, then slid her right hand up to touch his forehead. No fever, but... His eyes were glazed. "Are you? Did they hurt you? Tell me if they hurt you!"

"Mom..." Adam groaned as his mother squeezed him hard. Wow, who knew she was that strong? "Nobody hurt me. They kept asking me the same stupid questions over and over and wow, that agent had no sense of humor and... " He paused and looked around. "This just seems like purgatory. I'm... alive."

"You need to eat," Leila said firmly. "Geoffrey has food. Doesn't he?"

Geoffrey nodded and cleared his throat self-consciously as Lane took her turn to throw herself at Adam and Dani slid inside to give her own hug. He once again patted Adam's back. "Yes, in my plane. Let's go there so we can plan."

"Plan what?" Adam asked, hugging Lane and Dani back and then shaking Jacob's hand. Jacob looked sick. Then again, this horrible airport was enough to make even Jacob weep.

"How to handle this."

"This? I'm on my way...somewhere." Adam patted the little box now safely in his pocket. "I've got to finish the game."

"Ad..." Dani stared at him. "There's stubborn and then there's stupid. C'mon."

"No. I want to finish what I started or it means the fuckers won. They're not going to win. I am." 

"Are you kid _ding_?" Jacob held his screech in, but just barely. "You can be on every morning show tomorrow and on Piers Morgan tonight and Jay Leno tomorrow night -- he's already shot the show for today, but he's willing to bump his guest for tomorrow for you and--"

"Seriously, chill, dude." Adam shook his head. "I'm on vacation." 

"Adam." Geoffrey's cool voice made Adam snap to attention. "This little game of yours and Kris' has turned into an international story."

Incredulous, Adam asked, "You're not kidding?"

"No, babe." Dani gripped his arm. "It was breaking news on E and CNN and of course, Fox News."

"Fox News." Jacob groaned. "Adam, this is big news. Huge. All over the world. You need to counter it. And fast." 

"But..." Adam took a deep breath, then took the cup of coffee Lane was pushing at him. He took a long drink, then shuddered. "It's that bad?"

"It will be if we don't show you, released, free--"

"And back to my normal plan," Adam inserted. "Yeah, that's it. If I just go on as if nothing major happened, that will help."

"Perhaps," Geoffrey prevaricated. "Now listen. You don't have to do everything Jacob's suggesting, but you do have to do _something_ to address the rumors and speculation. Being accused of terrorism is bloody serious. You have to at least issue a video statement." 

"But I don't wanna..." Adam whined. "I just wanna finish the game!"

"Did you just whine?" Leila stared at him. Adam had been exhausted before he'd been detained and questioned for hours. The thread holding him together was stretched to the max right now. "How tired are you?" She nodded at Lane and they began urging Adam toward the exit to the private plane gates. "You can take a nap on the plane. With Emmaline. She's here too."

"Wow, called in the calvary!" Adam hurried. He could maybe sorta sleep. For a bit. "But none of you are going to keep me from finishing this game." 

"You cannot be serious!" Jacob exclaimed as they walked outside.

"Oh, he's bloody serious," Lane retorted. "The two of them... Always with their little games. They're about to be the death of me. The death! I will die in this bloody little ugly airport--"

"That's a very bad idea," Adam agreed. "This is a horrible airport. Horrible." He shuddered. "Very bad. Terrible. No good. Purgatory. I thought I was stuck here forever and so..." He took a breath. "Can we go? I want to go. Away. From. Here."

"We will do that, believe me," Geoffrey agreed. "But you need to make a statement. Piers can interview you over the phone--"

"I don't like him," Adam insisted. "He's a snot. A condescending, patronizing snot who thinks his British accent--"

"Hey!" Lane and Geoffrey exclaimed. 

"Okay, then Jay," Jacob suggested. "You like Jay."

"Stop talking to me like I'm a toddler who's refusing to eat my Cheerios!" Adam argued.

"Sorry!" Jacob snapped, then deflated. "I am. Sorry, that is. We were just..."

Geoffrey smiled. "Son, we're all on edge. You and all of us. It's just...we've all been mad worried about you."

"I guess so since you're all here. And..." Adam took a breath, then let it out on a long exhale. "Thanks. I mean it, thanks. It meant everything to me to come out of purgatory and see you all there. I.. can't even say what it meant." He paused and took another breath, closing his eyes as he felt his mother and Dani stroking his back. "But ... Can't Jacob just video me and you all can send it out?" Adam offered, veering away toward the plane he'd arrived on. He had to get on that plane or he'd end up back in LA talking to Jay Leno. Jay had always been good to him, but he wasn't Kris. And he sure as hell wasn't interested in fucking Jay Leno for the next week. 

"Adam!" Leila gasped as Lane laughed.

"Did I say that aloud?" Adam widened his eyes. "Hmm. Maybe I do need a nap." 

"How about we be efficient about this?" Jacob suggested.

Adam frowned. "What does that mean?"

"Let's combine your scavenger hunt with reclamation of your reputation. And a little promo."

Taking another long sip of his coffee, Adam took a breath to say, "You're a sick little man, Jake."

"It's Jacob. Ja _cob_!" Glaring at Adam, Jacob paused to gather his thoughts. "And I'm several inches taller than Kris, so I'm not little. Now listen. How about you still go to all the locations Kris set up for you, but instead of you searching for the boxes, we have a radio station present you with the box? And your mom and Dani and Emmaline will be with you."

"Family shot. Great idea," Geoffrey complimented. "Family man en route to a romantic rendezvous with his boyfriend, both of you still in love after all these years, but thwarted by a tragic misunderstanding enacted by hard-working patriots, but you're now back on track to meet the loving boyfriend. You might want to manage a tear in your eyes."

"Hmm." Jacob pondered. "Perhaps a little sniffle too. Or just look pale."

"He already looks pale!" Leila argued. "My poor boy."

"Thanks, Mom. At least you care about me." Adam sniffled, then groaned when Jacob and Geoffrey gave him triumphant grins.

"You're a natural at it. Really," Jacob enthused. 

"More importantly, we all care about you," Geoffrey said quickly. "We care about you enough to want to put a quick end to this hellacious story. Jacob's idea is brilliant. Quick and easy way to make you relatable and sympathetic. You make a little comment at each place about the terrible misunderstanding and how much you appreciate your fans and the dedication of hard-working federal agents -- use that voice to act your face off, in other words." 

"Do radio interviews? How is that more efficient? Those things take forever," Adam complained.

Lane shook her head. "Not if we do it on the tarmac and tell them they have fifteen minutes max -- You couldn't have found the boxes in fifteen minutes in each locations, so this plan will actually save you time. Fifteen minutes and then you're getting back on the plane. _I'll_ enforce it."

"Oooh, my enforcer." Adam smiled and gave Lane a one-armed hug. "So do you know where my last stop is? Oh who cares? As long as there's a bed, booze and bare-ass Kris, I'll be good."

 

Nine hours, four radio stops, five interviews -- because Jacob had managed to sneak in a video interview with Jay Leno -- planes, two taxis, a boat ride, a hamburger, a nap onboard the plane with Emmaline, a stern lecture by his mother, a wink from Dani, a phone call or twelve with Kris, eight indignant tweets from his brother complete with political references he didn't understand and a laconic phone call from his father, a pat on the back from Geoffrey, a series of instructions from Jacob he was planning to ignore, six doubloons in hand and seven cups of coffee later, Adam sighed, then smiled as he took in the sight before him.

"Paradise. Finally."


	54. Secrets, secrets...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks. NOTE: The section that begins with "Next leg" SHOULD all be in italics. For some reason, the HTML is being a total bitch and keeps inserting an end italics code where I never put it, then I delete it and it comes back. Ugh.

**Chapter 54: Secrets, secrets... Who's got the secret?  
Rating: R**

Nine hours, four radio stops, five interviews -- because Jacob had managed to sneak in a video interview with Jay Leno -- planes, two taxis, a boat ride, a hamburger, a nap onboard the plane with Emmaline, a stern lecture by his mother, a wink from Dani, a phone call or twelve with Kris, eight indignant tweets from his brother complete with political references he didn't understand and a laconic phone call from his father, a pat on the back from Geoffrey, a series of instructions from Jacob he was planning to ignore, six doubloons in hand and seven cups of coffee later, Adam sighed, then smiled as he took in the sight before him.

"Paradise. Finally." 

Pulling his gaze away from the idyllic sight of a pale stretch of sandy beach with palm trees and a small cottage, Adam looked back over his shoulder, wanting to make sure the driver who'd ferried him here had gone before he found and fucked Kris. Speaking of which, where was he? "I've traveled long enough. Get out here!" Adam yelled at the top of his voice, stepping backwards and nearly falling off the dock when his call startled birds who cawed and flapped loud wings as they set off out of the trees. Maybe it wasn't too late... he looked back at the boat, a white triangle growing smaller and smaller against the wide expanse of blue sky. Kris had better get his ass out here right now, because he was so done chasing him down, especially after that last little leg in the hunt. 

 

**_Next leg: A boat. Look for a man in a yellow hat._**

_"Okay, now I'm in a Curious George book?" Adam folded the note up into smaller and smaller halves, then shoved it in his pocket as he looked around the shopping center in Panama City where a taxi had deposited him. Finally spying a short dark-skinned man in a pale yellow baseball cap waving at him, Adam made his way over._

_"Mr. Barcelona?" The capped man asked with a broad smile._

"I guess that's me." Adam smiled. Barcelona... Madrid. He was so going to kill Kris. "Where are we going?"

"Kris -- Mr. Erizo-- told me to give you this..." The man held out a small box. 

"Mr. Erizo?" Adam parroted as he opened the box. Underneath yet another doubloon was a small plastic sword, the kind you'd find spearing an olive in a tropical drink someplace warm, only this sword was spearing a small piece of paper. Wiping his hand across his forehead because, yes, this steaming street outside the shopping center did indeed qualify as someplace warm, Adam shoved the doubloon and box into his pocket, then carefully pulled the paper free to read the scrawl of Kris' writing. 

If I could, I'd slay all your dragons for you. As it is, I've slayed the dragon named Workaholic that burns time. I've found a week and a secret place, just for you. __

_Adam smiled and stared at the sword. It reminded him of something, he couldn't remember what, something to do with Kris... Oh hell, he was probably going to be in trouble for forgetting... He'd have to find a way to distract Kris. Sex would do. Or in a pinch, food. But somehow he doubted that he was going to be calling Kim Allen for the recipe for dump cake the way the man with the yellow hat was motioning that they needed to hurry while waving a small bag at him. He nodded and pulled the box out to carefully store the little plastic sword and the note inside. He was going to keep that little souvenir. At least until he remembered why it was important._

_"Come, come, Mr. Barcelona!" The man opened the car door and gestured impatiently. "We have to get to the boat and then to your destination." He slammed the bag into Adam's stomach. "Here. You were supposed to eat at this restaurant, but I have had them make up a picnic lunch for you as you are already many hours late and we don't want to be out on the open sea in the darkness."_

_"Not my fault!" Adam protested, stifling a yawn as the blanket of heat and humidity immediately sapped the last bit of caffeine-fueled energy on which he'd been coasting._

_"You can rejuvenate at the island," the man offered as he set off down the street in a series of maneuvers that made Adam glad he already dyed his hair since it would probably be white when he woke up tomorrow._

_His eyes closed, Adam decided that he might believe in a deity if he or she or it would spare him from death on the streets of Panama City. He surely hadn't come this far and gone through all that shit just to die in a car crash. Had he? He gulped as the car hit a particularly deep pot hole and hoped that Kris wasn't planning on fucking him this week since he thought his asshole had probably been shoved up into his neck. He gulped again and then blurted out, "Island?"_

_"This island is owned by my family. It is one of several we own. We have been in the business of providing hospitality for two centuries now. It started with a small inn in Bermuda, then we gradually moved around the Caribbean acquiring small properties, always looking for the exclusive, luxury, locations. There is nothing more luxurious as privacy, yes?"_

_"Oh yeah. So where are we going?"_

_"Mr. Erizo has booked what the locals refer to as the Secret Island. It is a secret because we don't advertise. We rent it out certain weeks to people with references."_

_"Oh. So how do you get guests if you don't advertise?"_

_"Word of mouth." The man shrugged. "It is cheap and does the job."_

_Like Maybelline Great Lash mascara, Adam decided. "How many other guests will there be?"_

_"None. We only rent to one party at a time. We visit once per day at a pre-arranged time to bring over any provisions you request, but aside from that you are entirely private. You have my assurance on that matter, Mr. Barcelona."_

_"Entirely private?" Adam stared in disbelief at the man in the yellow hat. Privacy, total privacy? Was it even possible? And how much did it cost? Enough to make the payoff from selling out to a tabloid less lucrative? "And the likelihood of paparazzi finding us?"_

_"Zero. We do not use our guests' real names. And we do not inform on our guests. That would be the opposite of providing hospitality." The man stomped on the brakes as they reached the dock. He pointed towards the large boat._

_"Immensely awesome..." Adam said softly as he stared at the boat without seeing it, his gaze more focused on his imagination's ideas for what would come next._

_"That is what Mr. Erizo said too."_

_"Erizo?" Adam gripped the seat belt in tight hands and stared down at the bag in his lap that contained his lunch. As if he was going to eat now? "What does that mean?"_

_"It means... it's a small creature that is prickly. A..." The man shrugged and opened his door. "It is a North American animal?"_

_"Ah. Hedgehog."_

 

"Hedgehog!" Adam called out, stomping down the dock. "Get out here-- oh!" He gasped, then grinned as Kris stepped out onto the path leading to the dock, his skin gleaming against the dark green backdrop of the encroaching vegetation. His skin... all of his skin. All over. "You're naked."

Grinning, Kris pointed at Adam. Who was fully clothed. "And you're not. Hurry up, man. Don't you want to make up for lost time? All that time you wasted hanging around the Lambert Airport? Hmm?"

"Hell--- waitaminit!" Adam stopped in mid-step and put his suitcase -- of lube -- down on the dock. He crossed his arms and glared at Kris. Who looked soooo good. But still. A man had to have his pride or principles or... well, something that would make Kris annoyed, because after putting up with the TSA agents for hours, Kris deserved to be aggravated. "You honestly think that this..." Pointing his finger up and down, from Kris' feet up to his head and back down again, making a circle as his finger pointed at Kris' cock, Adam shook his head. "You honestly think that all you have to do to seduce me is show up naked?"

"Ummm... yeah?" Kris rubbed the back of his neck in confusion, then walked forward slowly, examining the secrets in Adam's eyes. Was Adam playing hard to get? After five years? He looked at Adam and then nodded as he began to run at him, racing faster when he saw the immediate smile blossom on Adam's face and knew he'd made the right move. He smiled in relief and happiness and launched himself at Adam, laughing as Adam caught him and pulled him close. His legs and arms wrapped around Adam, he nuzzled into Adam's neck and breathed deeply, burrowing deeper into Adam's embrace as they both sighed. Kris kissed his way up Adam's neck and over his jaw, then brushed his lips back and forth against Adam's and whispered. "You can still surprise me, you know?"

"Surprise _you_?" Adam waved his hand in a circle, encompassing the small breadth of the island, then circled Kris' waist with his hands. He sighed and bent forward to drop his forehead against Kris' shoulder. "This whole scheme? I didn't know you had this in you, Kristopher Allen."

"Well, right now I'd like it if this..." Kris rocked his hips forward and pressed against Adam's bulge. "Was in me." 

"Oh really?" Adam grinned, then slid his hands down over Kris' ass and squeezed. "Well, I do have a truly astonishing supply of lube and--- what's this?" His hands froze as he felt slickness against his fingertips along the crack of Kris' ass. "Did you... Did you honestly lube yourself up before I got here?"

"Well, I figured you'd be aggravated and needin' to work out your stress. So I was just bein' a good Scout and bein' prepared. I had my own luuuuube with meeeee--" Kris voice rose, then fell into waves of laughter as Adam pushed him down onto the dock. He squealed in shock when his body hit the heated wood and involuntarily arched up.

"Well, day-umm..." Adam whistled appreciatively at the sight of Kris arching up at him, before pulling off his shirt and tossing it down for Kris to rest on. "If you were such a good Scout, then you would've met me just like this..." Adam grinned as he shoved Kris' legs apart with his foot, while unzipping his jeans. "Because I have a lot of stress to work out on your hot ass." 

 

"You're gonna get a sunburn on _your_ ass," Kris observed as he smoothed his hands down Adam's bare back. "And that would ruin your vacation. And mine. Because I intend to have that ass too, ya know." 

"We'll see about that." Adam smirked as he stood up. "Because you need to work a little more diligently and with more imagination if you want to seduce me."

"Really." Kris rolled his eyes. "I thought I had plen-teee of imagination. What with the Amazing Race version of geocaching. Minus the leetle detail of the TSA detainment. Plus the accessories." He bent over to grab the suitcase of lube.

Adam grinned as he slapped Kris' butt and watched him jump. "You mean the lube?"

"C'mon. The suitcase o' lube was inspired! And will be useful too." Kris nudged at Adam's discarded clothes with his bare foot. "It set the mood, ya know."

"Yeah. That is, if that florescent pink dildo didn't do it. I know it made me feel really sexy."

Giggling, Kris watched Adam bend over and pick up his clothes, then pointed to the path off of the dock. "I wish I could've seen your face when you opened that suitcase."

" _My_ face? You should've seen the TSA agent's face! Guy had no sense of humor. At all. I mean, like, none." Adam shook his head as he followed Kris off the dock. As they reached the entrance to the path leading into the verdant green and darker tropical plants, Adam stopped and looked back over his shoulder. Nothing but the dock and brilliant blue ocean and endless sky as far as he could see. "We're really alone. In paradise."

"We really are. We can do whatever we want. Or nothing at all. Well, I mean, aside from sex. Because I'm seriously planning on plenty of that. Since we're alone for the first time in forever. Really alone." Waiting patiently while Adam stared at the horizon, Kris took the opportunity to look at a view he considered infinitely more appealing, his naked boyfriend. "Then again, we'd better be or Perez is gonna have some exciting photos of us on vacation. I can't believe you did me on the dock!"

"Lead on and show me all the other places I'm gonna do you," Adam suggested, turning back to smile down at Kris. "Maybe with that pink dildo." 

"Now, that'd be a picture!" Staring up at Adam, Kris took in the faint lines of exhaustion around his eyes and the tightness around his mouth that even their kisses had done little to remove. Yet. If he had to spend the entire week kissing... and licking and sucking and fucking Adam he would. Oh, the sacrifices. Laughing, he tugged on Adam's hand. "Follow me. I was gonna do another scavenger hunt once you got here, but I figure you've had enough of that."

"Unless you want to do some role playing and I get to be the TSA agent interrogating you."

"Well, I was ready for my strip search." Bumping his bare hip against Adam's, Kris snickered.

"That you were. What a compliant prisoner." Adam ran his free hand down Kris' back and rested it on the curve of Kris' ass. "Now show me what's in your baggage, sir." 

"Follow me!" Kris hurried forward.

"I'd follow that ass anywhere." 

"Are you really supposed to talk to your prisoners like that, Agent?" Kris looked over his shoulder and did his best to flutter his eyelashes at Adam, knowing he was going to fail and glad of it when he heard Adam's delighted laugh. That was what he'd wanted from this vacation -- for Adam to relax and have a good time. And share secrets. And have sex. Speaking of which... Kris hurried up the path towards the small, but luxurious cottage. "You must be tired. And hungry?"

"Mostly tired," Adam admitted. "The man in the yellow hat gave me a sandwich and I ate on the boat over here." He paused as they entered the cottage and smiled. It was...soothing, all white and blue with a wall of windows looking out onto the horizon, the sky pinkening in the distance with the glow of the setting sun. He yawned.

"Let's get into the bedroom and you can sleep," Kris urged. "I'll make some food and--"

"No. Sleep with me for a while. Or at least lie down with me. I want to hold you close." Adam wrapped his arms around Kris. 

"I think I can make that sacrifice." Kris smiled as he took Adam into the bedroom and they fell into the bed. "Go to sleep and I'll wake you up later with a blowjob?"

"Gods, I love the way your mind works. Now work your ass and wiggle on top of me," Adam murmured, his eyes closing almost immediately. He reached for Kris and pulled him across the sheets, sighing happily when Kris slid an arm and a leg around him and rubbed his cheek against Adam's shoulder. "I sleep better when you're curled around me, babe."

 

"Why are you awake in the middle of the night and yet not giving me a blowjob?" Adam asked sleepily as he rubbed his eyes. Damn it was dark out here. "No lights."

"What? Oh yeah. It is dark." Sitting next to Adam in the bed, Kris hugged his knees as Adam reached over to the nightstand and turned on the small reading light. "And quiet."

"And yet you're awake." Stroking his hand down Kris' back, Adam felt the goosebumps on Kris' skin. "What's up? Are you sick?"

"No. I just..." Kris closed his eyes. 

Angling up on his elbow, Adam peered at Kris in the darkness. Kris wasn't sick, he was anxious. "You know, closing your eyes doesn't make the monsters go away. It just makes it so that you can't see them coming. It's better to keep your eyes open and be prepared. Or that's what I used to tell Neil when he was a little kid."

"You weren't the one pretending to be a monster and scaring the crap out of him?"

"Well, yeah. But then I earned some serious big brother points with the parents by being helpful and concerned."

Kris gave a bark of laughter. "Playing both sides? See? That agent was right -- you could do a long con." 

"Get real. I'd get bored." Adam curled his fingers around Kris' thigh and squeezed. More goosebumps. "What's your monster tonight?"

"I... I need to tell you. About..." Kris paused, then swallowed. "Geoffrey said I should. And I should. So here goes. This deal..."

When Kris said nothing more, Adam ran his hand up and down Kris' thigh and smiled. "You mean the record deal RCA offered you?"

"Oh! That..." Kris gasped. "You knew? How...?"

Adam rolled his eyes. "Lane may be your BFF, but she cannot keep a secret from me." He grinned as Kris glared at him while making a grunting sound and smoothed his hand over Kris' hair. His hedgehog. 

"So. The label -- your label -- wants to sign me now."

Adam grinned. "You must be enjoying this moment. Or you should. Why so anxious?"

"I am enjoying the moment, but..." Kris grumbled, then shook his head. "Yeah, you're right. I am enjoying it. I am enjoying the fact that they rejected me before at least in part I was gay, but they made it quite clear that although I have a cd's worth of good songs and performing experience now, what they're gonna use to sell me is my relationship with the most famous gay guy in music. _You_. So now being gay is getting me a contract." He paused, then sang, "Isn't it, ironic?" 

"Wait. Don't say that. Your cd is fantastic, Kris. And they know if it's not good, no amount of tweeting on my part would help." 

"Eh. Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber have sold a katrillion cds."

"Concentrate on the positive, hedgehog." 

"I am. I am concentrating on the look on their faces when I turned them down."

"You did what?"

"I turned them down. Now, stop!" Kris held up his hand as Adam opened his mouth, no doubt to argue. "I thought about it. I talked about it with Hannah and Lane. And Geoffrey, of course."

"With Hannah. And Lane. And Geoffrey, _of course._ " 

Uh-oh. Kris bit his lip. When Adam got all quiet like that, trouble lay ahead. "I needed someone who is a little more objective about my potential than you are."

"Indeed. Do tell me more. If you care to." 

"Oh fuck."

"Not at the moment, thank you." 

"Well, I talked with them. And they agreed with me that the label would... Oh shit, I'm gonna cut to the chase. Long story short, regardless of what material success I might achieve -- and that's a big might, because nothing in this business makes any sense -- I didn't want both of us tied to the same company. It would give them too much power over us. As a couple. You know?"

"Yeah, I know."

"Then why... Were you just busting my chops?"

"Yup." 

Kris launched himself on top of Adam, laughing when Adam pulled his legs astride Adam's hips. "So..." He wiggled around on Adam's lap, wrapping his arms around Adam's shoulders. "What do you think I should do?"

"What do I think you should do?" Adam cupped Kris' ass in his hands and squeezed. "Get the lube already."

"No!" Kris burst out laughing. "I meant about the record deal."

"Oh, that?" Shrugging, Adam reached out for the lube himself. "I'll think better if my dick is inside you."

Eagerly watching Adam coat his fingers with lube, Kris automatically straightened his legs to give Adam access, even as he argued, "No you won't."

"Sure I will. It will help me focus." 

"Your dick inside me will help you focus?" Kris asked dubiously, even as he rubbed his hardening cock against Adam's and enjoyed Adam's low groan. "Oh!" He shouted as Adam's fingers found his prostate and his cock lengthened and pushed against Adam's pelvis. "Oh hell yeah, I'm focused, alright."

"See? Focus on that one area that needs it..." Adam whispered, watching Kris' face tighten with need as he began wiggling around on Adam's fingers, chasing the pleasure.

"One area that needs it." Kris nodded in agreement, licked his palm and reached for Adam's cock, quickly pumping it to full hardness. "Give me--"

"My advice. Sure. Here goes..." Adam waited and grinned when Kris impatiently pushed at his shoulders and angled forward, trying to impale himself on Adam's cock. Just as his cock brushed against Kris' balls and he heard that little hissing intake of breath that Kris made right before he was taken, Adam shrugged. "Okay. Hannah should be shopping the cd around to other labels. Use the RCA offer to drum up interest from other labels. Or do an indie label. Or we can issue it ourselves." 

"Wow, that is focus and -- Oh!" Kris gasped as Adam shoved hard inside him and hit that spot. "Right there." 

"I aim to please..." Adam laughed as he pulled back out, then pushed in, careful to hit Kris' prostate.

"You have excellent aim!" Kris gasped, then cried out. He gulped when Adam pushed his legs further apart and he was able to penetrate deeper. "God, I love how fucking big your cock is."

Gasping as Kris' words made his blood heat and his heart pound, Adam thrust hard into Kris' welcoming, greedy tightness. "And I love how you take it all and want more."

"Always, always..." Kris agreed, before bending his head and taking Adam's warm mouth in a hungry kiss. Always he wanted more, always. And that was no secret to anyone.

 

"Wut? Where am I?" Adam cried out, sitting up, blinking his eyes in confusion. He didn't recognize the room, but he'd been in so many hotel rooms lately... And wait. This wasn't a room, this was the beach and he was naked and oh hell, pictures! "No--" 

"Shhh..." Kris said softly, stroking Adam's back. "We're on vacation, remember? On an island, just the two of us. We're safe. You got here last night and wanted to come out for a swim this morning. Then we had some juice and fell asleep." 

"Ohhh, that's right..." Lying back down on his side, Adam closed his eyes and smiled as Kris -- naked Kris -- slid behind him. He could get accustomed to swimming naked and lying on a beach naked with Kris. He could get used to anything involving a naked Kris, if he were being honest.

Cuddling up behind Adam, Kris wrapped his arms around his waist, then rested his cheek against Adam's back. "Just relax." He smiled in satisfaction when he felt Adam slump back against him with a long sigh. 

"Okay." Closing his eyes and taking long deep breaths, Adam focused on the sound of the waves caressing the sand, birds talking to each other in the trees, the tree fronds rustling in the wind and Kris humming, the vibrations starting out as prickly little spikes against his skin, but settling into gentle tendrils of warmth easing his tension. He looked down and smiled at the sight of Kris' arm around him, Kris' hand making circles on his chest. "This is... nice. More than nice. _Special._ Thanks for arranging this."

"My pleasure." Kris resumed humming a song he'd been writing during the wait for Adam to get here, while slowly rubbing his hardening cock against Adam's ass. He slid his hand down Adam's chest and over his abdomen, then curled his fingers around Adam's cock and slowly stroked it from tip to base and back again. Wiggling closer and arching against the long length of Adam's body, he smiled. "God, I love feeling you all naked and warm out in the open like this. It's...a fantasy of mine, I think. Being here like this..." He moaned softly as the pre-cum from his cock slickened his strokes in the cleft of Adam's ass. "I want you so much... Let me in..." 

"Take me where you want to go," Adam urged, closing his eyes and letting his senses run free. 

 

"Where are my clothes?" Adam asked, poking around the bedroom. He'd fallen back into a deep sleep after they'd had sex last night and again this morning. Eventually Kris had coaxed his drowsy self back inside and he'd slept again, waking only when the sound of the boat delivering the day's supplies had woken him up. He didn't remember putting his case away, but the lube and ridiculous pink dildo were on the dresser, along with the last little geocaching box. But where were his clothes? "Kris! Where are my clothes?"

Coming back into the bedroom and shucking his shorts off, Kris tilted his head to better enjoy the sight of naked Adam bending over to look in the small closet. He grinned. Life was _good_. "I hid them."

"You hid them?" Adam straightened up and spun around. "I'm confused. I need--"

"You don't need any clothes." Kris rolled his eyes as he went into the bathroom and washed his face, careful not to waste water since the supply was from a cistern.

Taking the washcloth from Kris, Adam washed his face as well, then asked, "What do you mean?"

"I meannnn. We're on vacation. On a tropical island. Alone. Alone. Alone!" Kris punctuated his words by poking Adam's chest, then sliding his fingers down and pinching Adam's nipple. Hard. Maybe a little harder than necessary. But it was necessary to shock Adam out of one of his funks about his body. 

"Ow!"

Lowering his voice and trying to make it creepy, Kris intoned, "No one can hear you screammmmm..." 

"Was that your best impression of Vincent Price?" Smiling as Kris kissed his nipple, then the other, Adam slid his hands along Kris' shoulders. He sucked in a breath as Kris sucked his nipple into his mouth and stared down at the intent look on Kris' face. 

Giving a long lick to the nub of tight flesh under his mouth, Kris smiled. "Too old school. I was imitating that really awesomely creepy cast member at Tower of Terror at Disneyland."

"Oooh, I love that ride!"

"I know you do." Kris grinned. If he kept talking, Adam would probably forget about being naked. Then again, the point wasn't for Adam to forget, the point was that -- someday -- Adam would get completely past his stupid fears. So confront them headlong, he told himself, even as he acknowledged his own hypocrisy. He curled his hands around Adam's shoulders and shook him gently. "C'mon. There is no one around but me. And so we can be naked. Except for sunblock. And a hat for you."

"But..." Adam trailed off when Kris got that stubborn look on his face and crossed his arms for good measure.

"Here's the deal. _I'm_ not gonna be naked if _you're_ not gonna be naked. Your choice. So what's it gonna be?"

"Well, hell." Adam bit his lip. The downside was him being naked all the time. The upside was Kris being naked all the time. Which meant he'd want to have sex with Kris. A lot. And being naked would make it easier. More efficient. But still, he could stand to lose a few pounds, do some more sit-ups...

"No, no, no!" Kris shook his head as he saw the flash of anxiety in Adam's eyes. Sometimes he didn't think Adam would ever fully leave his insecurities behind. He had to find a way... "You're gonna be naked. Because I _want_ you to be naked. It's... your early Christmas present to me. That's what I want. You naked during our vacation." Kris blinked his eyes rapidly and looked up from under his lashes, hoping he was channeling his best Puss in Boots face.

"Are you seriously..." Adam rolled his eyes. Kris was a terrible actor. "If you're Puss in Boots, who am I? The Donkey?"

"Well, I do have a thing for your ass..." Kris grinned, then bent his head once again and kissed Adam's chest, before pushing him back. "I have to go to the bathroom. Why don't you go do your favoritest thing to do in the morning?"

"Suck you off?"

"No." 

"Fuck you in the shower?"

"No."

"Watch you suck _me_ off?"

"No." Kris giggled. "Make coffee." 

"You are a sad, sick little man if you think my most favorite thing to do in the morning is make coffee."

"Go!" Kris shoved Adam out the door. 

Padding out into the living area, Adam paused and then hurried into the kitchen, poking at the small coffeemaker on the counter until he figured it out and set it to brewing. It had been a long time, a very long time, since he and Kris had been naked in their house. As much as he loved Emmaline and living with Danielle, he had to admit that having this kind of privacy was... Well, he was going to see Kris naked all week, so this kind of privacy was a wonderful gift. Kris might have asked for it for Christmas, but it was a gift to them both. 

Biting his lip and peeking out the door to see Adam staring at the coffeemaker as if it held the secrets to the universe, Kris nodded and hurried over to the closet. He was relieved to see Adam's small case was still hidden under a huge stack of towels, just where he'd put it after Adam had fallen into a deep sleep last night. He smiled when he looked at the small dresser and saw the rows of lube tubes he'd lined up with the pink dildo standing on end. And that little box with the sword -- he wondered if Adam remembered how they'd found and taken the little cocktail sword on their first geocaching date? Well, time to get out some other toys...

"Coffee!" Adam yelled as he poured it into two brightly colored mugs.

"Comin'!" Kris yelled back hurrying toward the living area and stopping to grin at the sight of a naked Adam leaning against the kitchen counter. "Oh, I don't know if I can afford this..." He began patting his hips where pockets would normally be.

"Can I buy you a cup of coffee, stranger?" Adam asked, holding a ceramic mug with a palm tree out toward Kris. "My treat."

Doing his best to give Adam a suspicious look because he knew the game Adam wanted to play -- one of his favorites, the 'story of how we met' game -- Kris decided he'd be better off just hiding his face by taking a long drink. "Why would you buy a stranger a cup of coffee?"

"Because I like the look of his ass." Smirking, Adam moved his eyes down Kris' body and grinned. "And I have to say I like your look now way better than the first time I bought you a coffee."

"I'm _naked_ now."

Adam leered. "That's my _point_."

"No." Kris put his coffee down and reached confidently for Adam's cock, circling it with his hand and gently stroking it. He was really going to enjoy this vacation. " _This_ is your point." 

"My, cute little guy, you're forward. As well as naked. I should come to this coffee shop more often!" Adam teased, gesturing around the small kitchen of the cottage, even as he pushed forward into Kris' hand. 

"What's even more handy..." Kris smirked as he slid his hand down and stroked Adam's smooth balls. "Is that there's a bedroom attached. So you can get caffeinated and come all at the same time."

"I think I need a demonstration of the wonders of this coffeehouse." 

" _Come_ with me." Keeping his hand on Adam's balls, Kris pulled him forward. "I have you by your balls as, I believe, Perez has stated on a few occasions. 'Cause he's jealous he doesn't get to handle them."

"Oh!" Adam laughed as he followed Kris into the bedroom. "Wait. We're alone. And naked. We could do it in the kitchen."

"I need my supplies."

"That's true. I like my soy lattes."

"Yuck! We're not going for the fake stuff here!" Kris shook his head. "We only serve the real goods at this coffeehouse." He dropped his hand to pick up a tube of lube on the dresser and wave it at Adam. 

"I doubt the flavoring in that lube is natural and organic," Adam commented as he caught sight of the label. "And wait... is that seriously coffee-flavored lube?"

"Well, I know how much you like your coffee..." Kris laughed at the light-hearted look in Adam's eyes. He was already looking more relaxed. "But do you want to make another selection from the menu?" He gestured towards the dresser top. 

"So..." Adam smirked as he looked at the array of sex toys Kris had spread out on the counter like a kinky buffet. "This is how you'd answer the question about what five things you'd bring if you were exiled on a tropical island?"

"Exile. It's what you make of it." Kris shrugged and grinned, then hissed in a breath when Adam picked up the cock ring and twirled it around his index finger. "We have coffee and a cock ring? What more do we need?" 

 

"I need to take more time off like this... and with family. Friends, too..." Adam murmured, closing his eyes to enjoy the feel of the sun as he and Kris sat on a towel on the dock, lazily kicking their feet in the water the next day. All they'd done the day before was have sex, sleep, eat, sit on the beach and have more sex. Perfect. 

"We need to take more time off for us alone and with them. You're right," Kris agreed easily, since he'd been saying that for oh-he-didn't-know like a year.

Glancing at Kris and seeing the smug told-you-so-look on his face, Adam splashed water at Kris' feet. "Let me guess. I'm right because I'm agreeing with you."

"Of course." Kris splashed back. 

"Our immediate family could use a break. You, me, Dani, Emmaline, maybe the grandparents?" 

"Emmaline would get awful spoiled with all that attention," Kris noted, scooting closer to Adam and elbowing his ribs until Adam put his arm around him. 

Kissing Kris' head, Adam smiled. Kris was such a snuggler. "A little spoiling won't hurt her."

"Did Emmaline cry when you left her in Houston?" Kris asked, running his fingertips up the long length of Adam's bare thigh.

"No. She knows I leave, but I always come back." Adam smiled. "It was good that she came out with the calvary to St. Louis. We took a nap together on the plane. She's like you when she sleeps. Very snuggly. Cuuuute. So wittle and cuuute..." He pinched the tip of Kris' nose, then squeaked when Kris pinched his thigh. "Hey, she is the cutest."

" _She_ is."

"When she's not being the most stubborn thing in a small package. Sometimes I think she's biologically your kid." 

"Our next kid could be," Kris ventured.

Adam rolled his eyes and muttered, "Here we go again..."

Stroking his finger along Adam's bare arm and feeling once again the strong tug in his heart toward a little boy with strawberry blond hair and freckles, Kris blurted out, "Do you really not want more children? Dani and I really and truly want--"

"Stop bugging me about it!" Adam jumped off the dock and began swimming away.

"Huh? Whowa --Wha -- Hey!" Kris yelled and jumped to his feet, his body wet from the large splash Adam had made. His mouth was agape and tasting salt from the splash as he watched Adam swim away as if a shark was chomping at his heels. "Damn it!" Kris swore, feeling like he was screwing up all over the place. This vacation was supposed to be about giving Adam time to relax and rejuvenate and so far, he'd been arrested, interrogated, interviewed, and now? Adam obviously felt badgered. Damn it. He should go after him...

Looking up as he turned in the water, Adam squinted against the sun's glare. Kris was standing on the dock. Probably wondering what to do, his naturally laconic nature vying with his need to thump Adam upside the head. Well, not only did he deserve that thump, he could no doubt use it, use something to shake an idea loose or shake the fear free. He somersaulted in the water and swam away once again. 

His foot tapping a staccato rhythm on the wooden dock, Kris prepared to toss his sunglasses aside and jump into the crystalline depths beneath his feet. He paused as he realized he could never catch Adam when the taller man was churning through the water like a combine through corn. Anger and adrenaline was giving him an even greater advantage than the length of his body. And his legs. God, they were so awesomely long. 

Maybe he could just swim until Kris gave up, Adam thought. Kris was easy-going. He'd let it go. Except... not on this issue. He was going to have to talk to Kris, come clean, but first... he needed to think. 

Kris flipped his sunglasses down over his eyes so he could see without the glare of the sun on the water as he watched Adam plow ahead. Hmm. He was probably going to end up with a sunburn on his ass. Kris sighed and stood up to go back to the cottage and grab more sunblock, something to drink and some more towels. And then he was going to wait. It wouldn't take that long. Adam tended to fly off the handle quickly, then fly back on just as quickly. 

Well, this was stupid, Adam decided after his fifth turn as he caught sight of Kris now sitting on the dock reading a book. Waiting for him. Like he was a toddler having a tantrum. Yikes. Well, that was a super attractive way to behave. He sighed and dove under the water and headed straight ahead. He had a few more detours to make, but they should probably happen on dry land and with Kris at his side.

Kris put his book on the dock and looked down when Adam's head popped up out of the water in front of him. Adam reached out and tugged on his foot.

"Hey..." Adam began. He sighed and looked up. "I'm sorry. I was a doofus."

"Hey." Kris jiggled his foot when Adam said nothing more and the silence was lapped at by the water slapping against the dock. "You were. But that's okay. I've had my moments too. But what's goin' on? Talk to me. Here and now, we've got nuthin' but time." 

"You were out here the whole time. I saw you."

"Watching you. It's not safe to swim alone in the ocean." Kris shoved his foot gently against Adam's chest as Adam held onto his leg while treading water. "I think some guy from southern California might've told me that a few years ago. Who could it have been?"

"Some guy who was smart enough to talk to his boyfriend instead of trying to swim his problems away?"

"Yeah. Who is this guy?" Kris asked gently. Adam was never afraid to be confrontational. So it must be something big he was trying to work out in his own head first. Something that affected his desire to have more children together. Wondering what it could be, he shivered, then forced himself to continue. "Who, just like my real partner, should put on some sunblock. And have a drink. On dry land." 

"A drink with a little umbrella in it?"

"It's gotta be five o'clock somewhere," Kris agreed. He stood up and pointed towards the shady spot on beach where he'd set up an oversized blanket and supplies. When Adam nodded and began moving toward the beach, Kris gave a little hop and hurried his own way down the dock. "Then again, what time is it anyway?"

"I have no idea!" 

"And that's a good thing." Kris scurried to the blanket and knelt down, uncapping a bottle of martinis he'd mixed. "I don't have an umbrella."

"I'm not that precious."

"You are to me." Kris batted his lashes.

"Oh good lord." Adam flung himself down on the blanket. "You're trying to flirt, badly, and ply me with alcohol. Either you think I'm a special snowflake who needs protection or you want in my pants--"

"Luckily for me, you're not wearing any!" Kris teased, sliding the cold bottle down Adam's stomach until he touched Adam's cock.

"Eee-oow! Adam shrieked and pulled back. "Watch out. Shrinkage does no one any good." 

"Start talking, mister. Or I'll get out the ice..." Kris threatened in a low tone with his best western twang as he opened the bottle and poured out a drink.

"Is that...like some old cowboy actor?" Eagerly gulping the drink down, Adam laid back again.

"It was _John Wayne!_ Sheesh!" 

"I know, it's horrible. My ignorance of critical cultural phenoms like cowboy western movies is a shocking hole in my cultural knowledge."

"What's more shocking is the shocking hole in my knowledge of why asking about having more children made you literally jump off the dock."

"Oooh, good seque." Adam smiled. "Okay, pardner. Shoot."

"Okay, let's start with the big question. Do you not want any more children ever?"

"You and Danielle do."

"Yeah. But you need to be on board. And I'm wondering why you don't seem to be. Because I don't get it. You adore Emmaline and you're a great father."

"Thanks." Adam pressed his lips together as he debated. He finally offered, "I just feel so over-extended."

"Which is your own choice and you can make a different choice."

"Gee, thanks, _Dad_." Adam glared at Kris, then groaned and covered his face with his hat that Kris had so helpfully brought out. Ugh. How was he supposed to be angry with a guy who brought him martinis and a hat and was currently looking at him with a mix of concern and aggravation and love on his face? Well, he couldn't. He sighed.

"Okay, spill. What is it really?" Kris tried again, rolling on top of Adam and pulling off his hat. Crossing his arms over Adam's chest, Kris stared down at his face. He wouldn't make a comment about all the new freckles right now. 

"I..." Adam froze while he decided what to say. Kris had sent him on a merry chase the other day that involved detainment by federal agents. He could handle waiting while Adam figured out how to broach the real problem. Or problems. "I'm afraid."

"Of what?" Kris asked, careful to avoid showing skepticism. Maybe Adam really was afraid. 

"How... how can I love another child the way I do Emmaline? What if I don't? That's not right."

"Oh, Adammmm..." Kris leaned his head against Adam's shoulder. "You will." 

"What if my heart's not big enough?"

"It is." I count on that, Kris thought. He smiled. "Hey, remember how Scarlett actually talked about that once? How she was so afraid that she couldn't love her second son as much as her first? But she does. Not the same, since they're different. But each in their own unique way."

"She's probably right," Adam admitted. He ground his teeth.

"Okay, spill. Tell me what's really goin' on," Kris demanded. He knew Adam was telling the truth with these worries, but they weren't enough to have inspired a jump off a dock.

"The other thing is Dani. What if she meets a guy and wants a commitment with him? How's that going to work?"

"Oh." Kris gulped and sat up, straddling Adam's hips. "I didn't think about that."

"See?!" Adam nodded. Kris was the one who was eager to get married out of some remnant of his traditional up-bringing, but he hadn't thought of Dani making a permanent commitment to another guy, had he? "We have to consider every angle. Not be impulsive and think only of the moment, but the long-term picture. Even if Dani's not thinking about it right now, we should. Don't you think?"

"I think... Well, she's dated, but nothing serious. She says she's _not_ interested in anything serious."

"But maybe she'll meet the right guy and it will _get_ serious. Life happens and changes our plans, sometimes in ways we can never expect." Adam squeezed Kris' hand. "Like that day I walked into Starbucks."

"Or the day I went to Little Rock and walked into some guy from Conway. That led two years to me looking for change in my pocket one day at Starbucks and looking up, way up, into the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen."

"Awww." Adam slid his hand around Kris' neck and pulled him down for a kiss. "And we both wanted the same things. How sad would it have been if it didn't work out because we couldn't agree on lifestyle? So what if she meets the right guy and it does get serious. Like I said, life happens sometimes in ways we can never expect. She _could_ walk into Starbucks one day and _voila_!" Adam trailed a finger down Kris' arm. "Meet Mr. Right."

Smiling as he looked back over his shoulder and out at the seemingly limitless ocean before them, Kris nodded. "The Starbucks meeting? She could. It's not impossible, just... improbable."

"See, that's my point, Sherlock!" Adam reached up and turned Kris' face toward him, then bent to kiss his lips.

"You love that story -- of how we met, don't you?"

"I do." Adam shrugged and kissed Kris again. "It proves that the mysterious forces of the universe can -- sometimes -- work in our favor and in ways we would never expect. I wasn't looking per se, but the universe put me in that place at the same time as you and... here we are!" 

Shaking his head, Kris looked down and sifted sand through his fingers. "You're such a romantic, you know that? What matters to _me_ is not _how_ we met, but _that_ we met."

"Well, true, if you want to suck the romance out of it." Adam sighed, then did his best to sniffle. "It's only our origin story. The genesis of everything." He sniffed again. "That's all." Sniff. 

"Aha!" Kris exclaimed, poking his finger into Adam's thigh. "That is where Emmaline gets her pouting performance. You!"

"Humph. So what if Dani meets a great guy and her chance is ruined because of our living arrangement. I mean, it's one thing to have one kid in our untraditional arrangement, but more than that? Isn't that getting to be, I don't know, like we have some... whackjob compound?"

Kris burst out laughing. Adam could care less if anyone thought they were whackjobs. So this objection was a red herring, at least in part. He wiggled back down onto Adam, smiling when Adam put his arms around him. He kissed the base of Adam's neck and asked, "And what do we worship?"

"In your case? Edible glitter." Adam shook his head. "Seriously? I can't believe you brought edible glitter to a tropical island!"

"Hey, it matches!"

"Matches? Okay, I'll bite..." Adam smirked, then grabbed Kris' wrist, lifted his arm and bit the bicep. "Yeah, right there..." Parting his lips, he bit into the muscle again, smiling against the taut warm skin when Kris moaned softly, before taking little nips up the arm and over Kris' shoulder. "I'll bite..." He whispered, his teeth pinching lightly on their way up Kris' neck, his own soft moan wafting out when Kris arched his neck back.

"It matches...." Kris shook his head. "Don't distract me with your... evil ways."

"You just don't have an explanation of how it matches."

Kris shook his head."The edible glitter matches the bright colors of the tropics." 

"Sure." Adam chuckled. "You -- Mr. Plaid Shirt -- you just like it."

"On you. You make every exception the rule. Speaking of which, maybe the right guy for Dani will be the guy who's cool with the way we all live. Didja ever think of that?"

Hissing in a breath and looking over Kris' head, Adam shoved his feet down into the blanket and the soft sand underneath. 

"What is it, really?"

Adam dug his toes into the sand, then his heels. He ground down. 

Feeling how Adam was flexing his feet into the sand, like he was searching for something hard, Kris blinked, then grinned. He curled his leg around Adam's calf and squeezed. "Are you trying to find a way to put your foot down?"

Bemused, Adam stared over Kris and after getting distracted by his ass, looked at his feet and laughed. "I guess so. You know me -- always literal."

"Humph." Kris rolled his eyes. "I dunno. You come up with the most whimsical imagery sometimes."

"But I mean them literally."

"Bullshit. I know when you're bullshittin' me, sweetie." Kris squeezed Adam's ankle again. "C'mon. I know you. You've been leadin' me down the garden path to somewhere you don't want to go. What's goin' on, really?"

"I have to tell you something," Adam said in a rush, then took a deep breath.

"Okay." Kris waited, his heart pounding. The low furious tone to Adam's voice was rarely heard, but when it was, it was often better to get out of town. Or... _no._ That was his father. Not Adam. 

Adam took another deep breath. "I haven't told Dani yet, but Brian's been in contact. He wants money."

"Whaaat? When? He showed up at the bar too!" 

"Whaaat? When? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I knew you were stressed and I didn't want to put more on your plate. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to worry you and Dani. I was hoping the lawyers could deal with it and he would disappear."

"We're a great pair. Perfectly matched. Honestly." Kris rolled his eyes. 

"I know, right?" Adam squeezed Kris tightly. "Maybe we need to learn to stop trying to protect each other?"

"I dunno about that. That's what you do when you love someone, isn't it? But I do know we need to talk about Brian so we can be a united front."

"You're right. So tell me what happened with him. Where did you see him? He didn't show up at the house?"

"No, no. Thank god for being in a gate community, right?" Kris asked, looking at Adam carefully. He was still furious, but listening with that intense focus he applied to all important discussions. Hurrying, Kris began, "Okay, so. He showed up twice, the first time he was fine. Friendly. In his way."

"His damn annoying way?"

"Exactly. Acting like nothing had happened. But I wanted to punch his damn face."

 

_  
"Hey, Kris."_

_"Brian?" Kris goggled. He carefully put down his phone and stared._

_"You gonna offer this customer a drink?" John asked carefully. Kris didn't often give off the angry vibe these days, not in years actually. But right now he looked like he'd just as soon leap over the bar and launch himself at the other guy's head._

_"Not really. What do you want, Brian? Because you must want something."_

_"Nothing, notihng. I was just in the area and remembered you used to work here. Have to say I'm surprised you're still here. You're still with Adam, aren't you? So you don't need to work here. He's got enough money and as I recall had no problem sharing it. So why're you still pouring beer?"_

_"Working an honest job with decent people is something a man with self-respect does." Kris paused. "Not that_ you'd _know."_

_"Whoa. Harsh. Chill, dude." Brian held up his hands._

_"Don't tell me to chill. Dude." Kris took a step forward, his ribs hitting the bar's edge._

_Looking from Kris to Brian and back again, John laid a careful hand on Kris' arm. Feeling the tension under his fingers, John suggested softly, "Maybe you oughta go check on the Heineken shipment for a minute or two."_

 

"So what happened?" Adam prompted. 

"I stayed back there for a while. Until John came and told me that Brian had given up and left. He said Brian was polite, friendly. Asked a few general questions that everyone declined to answer and then left. He came back in the next night and at that point, John asked him to leave within a few minutes because I was gettin' riled up again. He was... actin' all decent. But I didn't trust him."

"Well, you were right. He's a cockroach. He'll keep coming back."

"Like you worried about. So he contact you? How?"

"Yeah. He contacted me and I told him I had nothing to say to him and he could talk to my lawyers."

"And..."

"He did. I didn't watch in the same room because I would've been like you -- reading to leap over the table and pound his damn face. So I watched through a window. We wanted a videotape, but he refused to allow it. Too bad. The lawyers are like Geoffrey -- they try tape everything."

"With permission, right? Because Geoffrey says you have to."

"Yeah. Anywaaaay..." Adam shook his head. "Why the hell have you and Geoffrey ever had a conversation about the legalities of videotaping?"

"He videotaped me... uh... once or twice when I was first meeting him. Remember, he and Hannah do that?"

"Oh yeah. Lane looked at those tapes when she was playing matchmaker." Adam smiled, then lost his amusement as he remembered watching Brian.

 

_"Oh, Adam's going to pay up," Brian said confidently. "Because you know, it would be a shame if the press or his favorite gossip blogger, Perez Hilton, got some intel."_

_"Like what?" The lawyer asked. The guy was an idiot. Even if they weren't taping him, his notes of this meeting and his testimony would be sufficient prove extortion._

_"That I'm Emmaline Lambert's real father."_

_"So what?" The lawyer shrugged. "The family has never made any secret of the fact that neither Adam nor Kris were the sperm donor. So if you identify yourself as the sperm donor, Adam isn't going to care. And frankly, it might be a short blurb on Access Hollywood or a line in Perez, but no one will remember in a week or two."_

_"I could sue for custody or visitation. I regret signing over my rights and want to sue for reinstatement."_

_"Which you would not get."_

_Brian shrugged._

 

Adam grimaced and clenched his hands, then forced himself to open his fists and smooth them down Kris' bare back. 

Moving his legs against Adam's and kissing his shoulder, Kris whispered, "What are you thinking? Talk to me. I need you to talk to me."

"I feel so... impotent!"

"Well, I can attest that you're not," Kris teased, waiting to see and -- yes, Adam smiled. "And I'll prove it later. But I get it. It's so damn frustrating. We can't really make him go away permanently. Whataya think he's gonna do next?"

"His plan may be to try and drag us into court, make a public stink about it. In the hopes that we'll pay him to go away. Again. He won't win because my lawyer says that we can counter with his extortion attempt, but he can try."

"So what do we do if he tries that?"

"Well, we want to shield Emmaline, right?" Adam asked. When Kris nodded, Adam continued. "So if he tries that, Dani and Emmaline could go somewhere less likely to have paps around for the duration."

"That would work. And I'd think that if Brian himself tried to make contact, we'd be able to get a restraining order, right?"

Adam sat up, curling his arms around Kris as Kris fell back. "It just pisses me off so damn much!" Adam smacked his hand against the blanket.

_Thwap!_

As sand flew up in a short spurt from the blanket, Adam complained, "He doesn't want to actually see her, he's just trying to get more money from me."

"Well, he's not gonna get it." Kris squared his shoulders, then pushed Adam back onto the beach blanket. "But you're gonna get what you need."

"And what's tha _aat_?" Gasping the last word as Kris slid down his body and took Adam's cock in his hand, Adam arched into Kris' touch, then gasped again when Kris licked the head of his cock. 

Kris looked up ans smiled. He stroked one hand up Adam's body, while kissing the top of his thigh and smiling against the heat of Adam's skin. Kissing, kissing, kissing his way inwards, he told Adam, "My hands, my lips, my love...everything you need to feel like you are the most important man on earth to me, forever. I want you to enjoy this moment."

"But..." Adam bit his lip. This Brian debacle had been eating away at him for weeks now and he'd much rather focus on Kris eating him up... justlikethatohhellyeah... He arched up into Kris' mouth. 

"We've got a plan on how to handle him now. So I want you to stop frettin' and start fuckin' me. Staring with my mouth? Got it?" Kris squeezed Adam's thighs, knowing he might leave bruises and not really caring. 

"What I'd like to get is a perfect memory of your pretty lips wrapped around my cock."

"Well, that's what I wanted this week to be. Perfect memories. So..." Kris bent his head and opened his mouth.


	55. Stubborn serendipity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes:  
> 1\. Kris mentions a "gigantor mum corsage" in this chapter. He's talking about the Homecoming Mum corsage, which seems to be mostly a tradition in Texas. To see what he's referencing, Google the phrase "Texas Homecoming Mum".  
> 2\. Emmaline talks about Heat Miser and Snow Miser, which are from The Year Without A Santa Claus. It's worth watching for [ this scene.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rh1BEw_WSbo)  
> 3\. Kris takes Adam to the restaurant Serendipity 3 (or III) in Manhattan. It's a real place, featured in the John Cuzak movie, _Serendipity_.

**Chapter 55: Stubborn Serendipity  
Rating: R**

 

"Surprised by paparazzi as they returned from a very private vacation..." Ryan Seacrest smiled and nodded at his co-host Giuliana Rancic on the set of E! News. "Adam Lambert and his long-time partner, Kris Allen, fielded questions not only about Lambert's detainment in -- of all places -- the _Lambert_ St. Louis Airport -- but about the Supreme Court ruling against Proposition 8, making same-sex marriage legal in California." 

 

"Surprised?" Lane scoffed as they watched the program on the tv in Geoffrey's office while waiting for Adam to arrive. "Jacob had _alerted_ the media!"

Geoffrey lifted his tea cup to his lips, then blew on the hot water. "Ryan likes to promulgate the fiction that publicists don't alert the media so that it seems like they have a serendipitous scoop or they're hard-working journalists. Instead of being mouthpieces for pr machines." 

 

"Indeed, Ry." Giuliana nodded. "The two men -- tanned and appearing rested after a vacation in a still-undisclosed location -- laughed about the situation in St. Louis, but were much more serious in answering questions about gay marriage in California. As you'll see in this this clip, both men shook their heads when asked if their _own_ wedding is now imminent. But given how long they've been one of the most stable gay couples in Hollywood, we can only wonder. And keep our eyes and ears peeled for any extremely large purchases of white glitter!"

 

"White glitter. As if." Adam smirked as he stood in the doorway with Hannah and nodded at the tv screen in front of Lane and Geoffrey that was playing video of him and Kris from LAX. Kris was trying to hide behind Adam and yet answer the questions. Emmaline handled the paps better than Kris. "That would be soooo obvious."

"And you're not into anything obvious at all, are you?" Hannah teased, giving Adam a gentle push into the office. 

"Aren't you Miss Eager Beaver?" Adam asked as he walked over to the table and picked up a cup and poured himself some tea. "Why? Why did I have to rush over for an emergency meeting?" He froze with the cup half-way to his lips. "Oh no. Are there naked pictures of us on vacation?"

"No!" Lane answered instantly, seeing the panic in Adam's eyes. "No, no. This is good."

"This is big, Adam," Hannah told him, sitting down and jiggling her leg. "Really big."

"That's what Kris said several times a day on vacation." Adam smirked as the other three groaned. "What? He _did_!"

"I'm sure. Kris did say that the bananas the host delivered were remarkably huge," Lane commented with a responding smirk of her own. 

"The man in the yellow hat. I honest to god thought I was in some Curious George book..." Adam began.

"Fascinating." Hannah glared at Adam. "Can we get on with this?"

"With what? What's the big secret?"

Geoffrey smiled, put his elbows on his knees and leaned forward. "Do you remember -- all those years ago -- when you were scheduled to be on ABC's Rockin' New Year's Eve and they cancelled after the AMAs?"

"Oh, vaguely." Adam rolled his eyes and impatiently gestured with his hand in a rolling motion. "What _now_? Isn't all that backlash over?"

"Oh, it's over. In fact --" Geoffrey grinned. "Let's start with the back story. The teen queen of the moment had to cancel that gig, as you may have heard."

Adam nodded. "That chick in your stable who was singing about saving it for the right guy and just announced her pregnancy?"

"Yes, that one!" Hannah exclaimed impatiently. "They dropped her which was breaking the signed contract, so Geoffrey negotiated and--"

"I will tell him!" Geoffrey interrupted. "In lieu of me suing their asses off, they're asking you to appear this year! And they gave you twice the number of songs they were giving her! Plus--"

"WHAT?" Adam squawked. "They want me on Rockin' New Year's Eve?"

"They do!" Hannah clapped her hands in excitement, then flushed as she saw Lane's amused gaze. "It feels sweet to me, so I can imagine what it feels like to you."

"Good things come to those who wait," Lane said primly, then burst out laughing when Adam gave her a derisive snort. 

"And who have a balls to the walls manager," Adam noted, smiling at Geoffrey, remembering how furious Geoffrey had been at that cancellation. "I know you've always vowed you'd get me back on that show."

"I did. I made a promise and with the help of a little bad luck for someone else, I keep my promises," Geoffrey said in a rush, more interested in the happiness of delayed gratification on Adam's face. "Good, you're as excited as I'd hoped you'd be."

"Why wouldn't I be? The stars aligned to right the situation and you took advantage of it."

Hannah nodded. "We were a little concerned you might be mad that you weren't their first choice?"

"All that matters in the end is... the end. I got the gig." Adam shrugged. "I'm gonna show them."

"Good. But I'm going to bloody well warn you." Pointing his finger at Adam, Geoffrey shook his head. "Let's avoid...shenanigans. And the glambulge. Play nice."

"Play nice? Well, fuck my life. You just sucked all the fun out of the gig entirely!"

"I'm sure you'll find a way to subvert the entire tradition of the show without anyone being the wiser," Hannah noted with a wry smile. 

Lane wrinkled her nose in confusion. "What would the entire tradition of the show be, might I inquire?" 

"The ball dropping is the key to the night. And yes, Adam..." Geoffrey smiled again. "You get to hit the buzzer and drop the ball."

"No fucking way!" Adam laughed. "They're actually going to let _me_ near a really big ball going down and a microphone?" 

"Uh-oh." The other three said in unison while Adam grinned. 

"How many songs?" Adam asked and they settled down to hammer out the details. An hour later, he stood and stretched. "So, we're done for now. Lane, are you coming with me now or..."

"I have to finish up some details on the scheduling with Hannah and I'll meet you this afternoon?" Lane asked.

"Sounds good." Adam looked at the three people most crucial to his music career and important in his actual life. He said gratefully, "I want to thank you three for being maybe the only three people in the fucking world who haven't asked when Kris and I are going to get married."

"Of course not!" Geoffrey held up his hands. "I'm not a meddler."

"I would never!" Hannah shook her head. "You know I have no interest in your personal life."

"I'm in no hurry to plan an Adam Lambert wedding." Lane shuddered. "Especially if it involves anything called dump cake." 

Adam stared at each one of them in turn. "Is this the game, Tell Two Lies and One Truth?"

 

"It's not geocaching, I'm just using the GPS on my phone to find the address! You're gonna love it. Have I ever steered you wrong?" Kris laughed after they'd exited the cab and were standing on the corner. The cab had made much better time in Manhattan traffic than he'd expected and they had time to kill before their reservation.

"Do you honestly want me to answer that with a recitation of the questions the TSA agents asked? In real time?" Adam retorted. "Starting with the one about the pink dildo?"

"Okay. So one time. Sheesh." Kris rolled his eyes. "If you weren't lollygagging--"

"Lollygagging? That sounds like a sex act." Leering down at Kris, Adam added, "Involving a lollypop, your throat and my dick."

"You _hope_ , but it's not. It's--"

"And then again, you lost your gag reflex years ago."

"Yeah and lollygagging is a term meaning dawdling."

"Dawdling. Sounds like another sex act."

Giggling, Kris bumped his shoulder into Adam's arm. "If you hurry up right now, I'll both lollygag and dawdle you tomorrow night before the show. Just like always."

"Ah. And who says we aren't traditional?" Adam scoffed. "We are."

"We are!" Kris agreed. "Other people have gigantor mum corsages and Labor Day parades and Shrove Tuesday pancake breakfasts and we have time alone in the green room before a show." 

"I don't even know what a mum corsage is, but I like our traditions better. Way better than pancakes. And where are we going?" Adam asked, laughing as Kris pulled him down the sidewalk. "I hope it's not too far. It's freezing!" He wrapped the scarf more carefully around his neck. 

"Wimpy California boy!" Kris teased, pretending to look at the GPS on his phone.

"First of all, consider yourself lucky that I'm doing any kind of geocaching with you again. And secondly, Manhattan is really cold in December," Adam protested. 

"Should've thought of that before you agreed to be on that Rockin' New Year's Eve show."

"Oh, no way was I going to turn that down. And no way would Geoffrey have let me," Adam reminded him. "After all that shit after the AMAs, it's sweeeeeet justice to have them ask me to appear."

"It only took, what? Seven years?"

"Guess I must've broken a mirror." Adam smiled as Kris' obvious eagerness for this little side trip. "But that's not true. My luck was turning around when I met you that day."

"You say that all the time," Kris said softly, then his face cleared as he looked ahead.

"Yes, that it was serendipity."

"Exactly!" Kris pointed. "There!"

"Where?"

"There!" Once again tugging Adam's hand, Kris laughed. "The restaurant. You know, like from the movie?"

"Serendipity Three?" Adam read the sign. "That's a real place?"

"It is!" Kris jumped up and down on the balls of his feet. "They serve ice cream. And actual food, but I thought you'd be most interested in the ice cream."

"Well, then. 'Lay on, MacDuff'!" 

"I thought it was lead on, MacDuff?" Kris as they walked down the steps to the front door of the restaurant. Oh shit, there were way more people than he'd expected. Lane had warned him that the place might be crowded with tourists in town for New Year's Eve. Crap. He might have to change the game plan. Well, that was okay. Adam would still like the place. And the idea. He'd just execute later. Maybe on New Year's Day over coffee. Yeah, that was a better idea actually. So he wasn't going to chicken out, the way Geoffrey had accused him of doing with that other plan before. He'd just changed his mind. People were allowed to change their minds. 

"Nope. That's what people think the line is, but it's not." Looking around the gift shop at the front of the restaurant, Adam smiled as he picked up a chocolate scented candle.

"And you're very smug about the fact that you know the real line, aren't you?" Kris teased, watching Adam poke around the little shop.

"I like knowing what's real and what's not. Even if I pretend I don't. Keeps that line between sane and crazy nice and thick." 

"Well, I like how thick your--"

"Gentleman?" The hostess asked. "How can I help you?"

"We have a reservation?" Kris held out a card. 

The hostess read it and smiled. "Of course, of course. Give me a moment." She stepped back and spoke softly into her mouthpiece, then gestured towards the stairs. "Follow me upstairs, if you please." 

Kris looked up at Adam and winked. "Lane set it up." And Lane was going to be so disappointed that he wasn't going to follow through on their plans, but he couldn't. Not with how crowded it was. He didn't want witnesses. 

"This looks like an old-fashioned ice cream parlor. Slightly on acid."

"It is an ice cream parlor. With real food. But they're famous for frozen hot chocolate." Kris offered as they went up the stairs. "Which is kinda like ice cream."

"I don't want kinda like. I want the real thing." Adam squeezed Kris' shoulder as they sat down.

"Don't pout." Kris wagged his finger at Adam. "Although... it is kinda cute when you pout."

"So I've been told." Adam winked as Kris glared at him.

"Don't even try making me jealous," Kris ordered. "It's ridiculous."

Adam complained with another pout, "You could _pretend_ to get jealous."

"I think you should," the hostess agreed. "Everyone likes to think they're worth getting jealous over."

"See? Told ya." Adam smiled smugly. 

Kris stared, then sighed. "Whoever said New Yorkers are unfriendly has never actually spent time in New York. Y'all are more free with opinions than Pearline. And less likely to pull snakes out of a cooler."

"Ookaaaay..." The hostess looked helplessly at Adam. "Is he jiving me?"

"No. Sadly, no. By the way, aren't we getting some of those ridiculously huge menus?" Adam asked the hostess. "Kris here likes things huge."

"Adammmm!" Kris giggled, then choked. 

"Kris here has set up a treat that's off-menu," the hostess told him with a grin. 

"Right here? Where everyone can see us?" Adam gasped and put his hand over his heart. He looked under the table. "Well, Kris is small, but I think even he would have trouble fitting under there and there is no tablecloth to hide him..."

"Adammmm!" Kris looked up as the hostess dissolved into her own giggle fit, then straightened up to motion a waiter with a tray over. "Okay, here we go. It's a backwards dinner. We're starting with dessert. And then we'll end with dessert too, because the rules don't apply to us, nosirreebob!"

"I like the way you think, Kris Allen." Adam sat up straight as the waiter set down a parfait glass with a flourish, then smiled as he detailed the sundae beginning with the mint chocolate chip ice cream.

"All your favorites in one sundae!" Kris explained as the waiter and hostess left them alone. Finally. Running his thumb against the edge of the box in his pocket, Kris debated, then left it in his pocket. Too many people. "Dig in. And don't say one word about the calories or fat. You've been rehearsing and exercising so much since Geoffrey got you this gig that you've lost weight. Eat up." 

"If..." Adam wiped his mouth with the napkin. "If you'd stop lecturing me for a moment and pay actual attention, you might've noticed I was the one eating my ice cream, while yours is untouched and melting."

"Oh." Kris looked down at Adam's parfait glass. How had he managed to eat that much while Kris didn't notice. Whoa. Guess nerves made you ignore the obvious. He shoved his spoon into his own sundae and moaned. "Awesome sauce. And I mean the sauce is awesome." Kris grinned.

"I thought you said my sauce was awesome?" Adam winked again. "So we're having dessert first?"

"Because life is short, so enjoy the good stuff." 

"Agreed." Adam nodded and resolved that at least for tonight, he wouldn't worry about the calories and fat content. Or at least he wouldn't say anything and ruin the treat Kris had set up for them. Keeping his voice low so no one else in the crowded restaurant would hear, he asked, "So, why this special date? Any reason?"

Patting the small box in his pocket, Kris smiled. It could and would wait. He wasn't chickening out, he was just being prudent. Adam had so much going on in the next day and a half, he shouldn't be distracted. And Kris liked his privacy any way. Yeah, the coffee on New Year's Day sounded like a better plan with every passing minute. "I just wanted to take you out because... well, a lot of reasons. First of all, I want to thank you for not stuffing my mother into a closet and leaving her there when you flew her out for Christmas last week."

 

_  
"Mama, you gotta stop hounding Adam about gettin' married," Kris implored, pulling his mother away from the bright lights of the Christmas tree and the flushed hue on Adam's face. "You're makin' him crazy."_

_"Well, he told me that when gay marriage was legal, he was gonna to marry you. So it's legal and I'm wonderin' when's the wedding!" Kim said, putting her hands on her hips. "I need to buy a new dress."_

_"It'll happen. The wedding and your new dress. But the more you push and poke at Adam, the more he'll resist. It's his nature."_

_"Typical man!" Kim huffed. "What's the good of bein' gay if he's just gonna act like a typical man? I ask you!"_

_"Ha. I'm not like that!"_

_"_ You're _stubborn as a mule." Kim glared. "You get an idea in your head and you won't let go even when it's actually gone. You hold onto nothing sometimes. Stubborn is as stubborn does. And you're stubborn, son."_

_"Am not." Kris glared back. "And for the record, we will get married. But let it happen, Mama. Just... let it happen."_

_"Unlike you, I'm not good at waiting for life to happen around me." Kim sniffed. "Why don't_ you _ask him?"_

_"Why don't I..." Kris blinked, then smiled._

_"Grammy Kim!" Emmaline shrieked, up to them. "And Dadakiss! Come back over here! UncaBrad and Auntie Allison are gonna do Heat Miser and Snow Miser for us!"_

_"Well, now, here we come!" Kim agreed. She pointed at her son. "Hurry up. Life can pass by all too fast now, hear me?"_

 

 

"Your mother..." Adam bit down hard on a chocolate chip. "She means well. But you didn't need to do all this to apologize. I know what it's like to have meddlers in my life. You've met Geoffrey, haven't you?"

"Kinda." Kris smiled and reached over the table to take Adam's hand. He squeezed it. "But that's not the only reason I wanted us to take time out for lunch today. Tonight and tomorrow are gonna be crazy busy getting ready for the show. And I wanted a chance for the two of us to celebrate the gig and well, us. The way you always talk about the universe putting us in the same place at the same time..." Kris nodded at the sign of the restaurant. "You think it was the stars aligning and all, but--"

"It was. Don't spoil it for me by being all rational."

"I..." Kris shook his head. "But I guess... My point is that you can make serendipity happen, you know?"

Opening his mouth to argue, Adam shoved another spoonful of ice cream inside instead. A wise man knew when to shut the fuck up and when to talk. Shutting the fuck up was his best option given the reality that Kris liked to plan their couple activities. He had gone to so much trouble to set up the vacation, wanting it to be perfect, and it had been aside from that contretemps at the Lambert St. Louis Airport. Swallowing the ice cream, Adam nodded. "You can make wonderful moments happen. And you have, Kris. Thanks. For everything."

"Thank you, sweetie. My life...since I met you my _life_ was been wonderful. I just want you to know that." Seeing the sincerity and the love in Adam's eyes as he nodded and whispered, 'Me too', Kris swallowed against the thickness in his throat and touched the box again. It was a good moment, but he looked down as he sensed people keying into who they were, looking whispering. Adam was ignoring it,but ... still. No privacy. Maybe after the show. 

 

 

"So, guys, what are the rituals you all have before a show?" Ryan asked the next night in the large and thankfully heated tent in Times Square, rocking back and forth on his heels. He had to yell to be heard over the noise of the New Year's Eve revelers outside. "Most performers have them."

"Not _us_." Tommy shook his head.

"Nope, not us," Isaac agreed. He and Tommy looked at each other and burst out laughing. They looked in the general direction of Adam's trailer and then laughed again. 

"Am I missing something?" Ryan asked, turning to Lane when Tommy and Isaac kept giggling together.

"Not at all. Don't be ridiculous!" Lane snapped, then smiled brightly when Ryan looked at her in shock. She had to distract Ryan away from focusing on Adam and Kris' whereabouts before the show. "Of course, I don't mean you, Ryan. I meant the two village idiots over there."

"Of course, you did." Ryan rolled his eyes. He had tried to hire her away from Adam for years and had never gotten more than an incredulous arch of an eyebrow from her. "I know you barely tolerate my presence."

"You are utterly ridiculous." Lane shrugged. Speaking of ridiculous, why had Kris carried a big basket of lollypops into Adam's trailer tonight? Eh, she didn't want to know. "It's that inferiority complex short men often seem to carry around with them like so much rubbish that needs to go into the bin that is making you believe that."

"Yes, short man syndrome is a problem." Geoffrey smiled as he strode into the prepping area. 

Ryan glared. "I don't have short man syndrome!"

"Excellent." Lane tapped his shoulder. "That means you've accepted the fact that your dick is indeed smaller than average. It's always good when people accept reality." She smiled, then moved to the table of food.

" _What_ did she just say?" Ryan asked as everyone else laughed around him. "She honestly didn't talk about my--"

 

"Cock. Give it to me..." Kris ordered, stifling a giggle as Adam backed away.

"Can't. There's seriously like a million people right outside these walls." Adam pointed at the thin trailer walls. 

"That's why I'm here. Doin' my job. You can't have a glambulge tonight..." Kris walked toward Adam with his hands outstretched. "I'm just here to do a pubic service."

"Don't you mean public service?" Adam hid his grin. If there was one truth in this world it was that Kris always got aggressively horny when they were getting ready for a show. He didn't think that he'd ever gone on stage without getting a little sumthin sumthin from Kris ever since they'd gotten together. They did have great traditions. And it was a great way to ring in a new year...

"Nope." Kris grinned. He saw the minute Adam decided getting a blow job in the trailer was a great idea. Well, the minute his brain decided. His cock had been on board ever since Kris had shooed the make up artist out of the trailer and finished applying glitter to Adam's collarbone. Bone. Speaking of which. "I mean pubic. As in show me your--" 

"Can't. I have white pants on!" Adam argued, putting his hand over his crotch. "They'll show any stains."

"No stains. I'll lick you up, nice and clean..." Kris slowly swiped his tongue over his bottom lip watching Adam's eyes darken. Aha! Had him. He pounced.


	56. The glittery ball drops

**Chapter 56.1: The glittery ball finally....  
Rating: R**

 

"Light, love and happiness in the new year to everyone!" Adam cried out as he hit the button to begin the ball drop in Times Square.

"Good job!" Mayor Bloomberg yelled over the endless explosions of noise that arched up and over them in waves as the cacophony of the crowd swelled to ever louder peaks as the ball fell.

"That is one huge, glittery ball..." Adam noted as they all watched the ball descend. "I approve." 

Kris leaned in. "I like it better when I've applied glitter to your balls. And then I drop my head and-- Ooof!" Kris grunted and giggled when Adam squeezed him in a tight hug.

"Count down with me," Adam urged. 

"If you promise to kiss me into next year."

"Always." 

 

Ryan stared. "Did Adam just kiss his boyfriend like he was never going to let him go...live on national tv?"

Reluctantly pulling back from her own New Year's kiss, Lane smiled as Cale put his arm around her and she turned into his side for warmth. Bloody hell, it was freezing out here. "Actually, it would be on _international_ tv as many foreign entertainment and news outlets carry coverage of the Times Square ball drop. And let's not forget web coverage."

"ABC and Dick Clark are not going to like it," Ryan warned.

"Oh, no. What _ever_ will they do? Ban him again?" Geoffrey shrugged and smiled down at Teresa, who was petting his arm in what he knew was an attempt to keep him calm. "At least the glambulge was kept in check. " He paused as Lane snorted. "We have to be realistic in our expectations." 

"Just trying to keep it real," Ryan argued.

"So were Adam and Kris. They're in love and have been for years. If Dick can't take seeing them kiss..." Geoffrey shrugged. "Then he won't be invited to the wedding. Which would be a shame since I'm sure it will be the LA social event of the year." Or it would if Kris weren't involved, because once Kris finally popped the question and they started planning the wedding, no way was Kris going to have a media circus wedding. Kris would probably try to con Adam into some private beachfront ceremony. But Ryan didn't know Kris well enough to realize that. And it was always fun to torture Ryan. 

Picking up her husband's cue, Teresa nodded, willing to start Ryan down the wrong path. "I can't wait to hear what they're planning. It's sure to be amazing."

"Circus." Cale spoke up, willing to add another fib. It wasn't a sin to lie to an entertainment 'reporter'. Kris had made that rule years ago and he thought it was a damn good rule. "I'm pretty sure I heard that they were going to hire a circus. But don't quote me on it because Adam could always change it up."

"He could," Lane agreed. "Maybe Burning Man might appeal." 

"It just might!" Teresa agreed. "Then again, they keep talking about Carnevale in Venice."

"Shh!" Geoffrey ordered. "Let's not forget that an esteemed member of the fourth estate is here." 

"Well!" Ryan slid closer. "Seriously. Any scoop for me? Anyone? Anyone?"

Cale laughed. "How much is it worth to you?"

"We don't pay for our information."

"Too bad, because I could totally be bought." Cale sighed loudly, then turned his face to his girlfriend. "Laney, are you done working now? Can we go party like it's 1999?"

"Definitely. We're all going to some club in Chelsea that Neil found. It apparently has a fantastic dj plus a VIP section." 

 

"Why did we need to come to a place with a VIP section if we're just gonna..." Kris moaned and tilted his head back as Adam kissed him until they were both gasping for breath and grinding against each other. "Spend time in the men's room instead of dancing?"

"Because..." Adam began, then tempted by the rosy redness of Kris' mouth, dove back in for more kissing. Reluctantly pulling back when his cock threatened to break his zipper, he continued, "Because the VIP men's room has a lock and after dancing with you plastered against my dick for the last hour, I need a place to put it."

"Oh do you?" Kris teased, standing on tip toe to nibble on Adam's bottom lip. "You already put it in my mouth earlier..." He laughed as Adam spun him around so that he was facing the wall. He gulped when the room kept spinning counterclockwise and leaned his forehead against the wall. "Hey. Do you think Ryan figured it out?"

"Don't know, don't care." Adam grunted as he unzipped Kris' jeans and tried to shove them down, his hands clumsy from tipsiness and the jeans too tight for easy removal. And Kris wiggling his ass back against him. So distracting. "What I care about is you getting out of those jeans. Why are they so tight?"

"You were the one who bought them for me!" 

"Are you really going all hedgehog on me when I'm doing my best to fuck you?"

"Yes. It gets you going and then we have really hot sex." Kris smirked at the wall, then groaned when Adam slid his hand over his hip and palmed his cock and balls in a tight grip. He wiggled, trying to pump into Adam's hand. 

"I know you're smirking." 

Nodding, then wishing he hadn't since the room began to spin again, Kris agreed, "You know me."

"I know you like this..." Adam grinned as he bit the taut flesh where shoulder met neck just as he stroked over the bottom curve of Kris' balls.

"You..." Kris gulped, then shoved his ass back. He rocked up on his toes, trying for a better angle. Damn it, they needed a step stool. Or to be less drunk. Or both. "Hurry up." 

"I'm trying!' Adam protested. "I swear, I'm going to develop a new line of clothes with hidden openings so you can fuck and dance at the same time."

"I don't get it..." Kris hissed in a breath as Adam finally succeeded in shoving his jeans and underwear down to his knees. "I can't wait--" He immediately reached around and scrabbled for the zipper on Adam's jeans, his hands brushing against Adam's as they both pushed his clothes aside. "So what was that about the clothes?" he asked, knowing that talking about fashion was foreplay to Adam. 

Closing his eyes to savor the feel of Kris pressing against his cock, Adam explained, "I mean, when we're dancing and you're grinding your ass against my dick, how hot would it be if I could slip my fingers down the seam and it would open and you'd be naked underneath them, of course--"

"Of course." Kris laughed, "Damn, I'm such a cock slut for you."

"Have I mentioned how much I like that about you?" Adam reached for the tube of lube in his pocket, then coated his fingers. "And I could shove my dick into the hole, then into your hole." 

"We did that already."

"No, we didn't."

"We did!" Kris giggled as Adam's slick fingers slid into him. He spread his legs as far as he could. "You're drunk and don't remember."

"You're drunk and are misremembering."

"No, I'm not. Well, mebbe a little. But I'm not misremembering. Remember, we were at some hotel somewhere and we were dancing in this ridiculous suite the promoter had given you and you got impatient and ripped my jeans?"

"Oh yeah. Sometimes..." Adam moaned as Kris began to fuck himself on Adam's fingers. They'd done this before, so many times, so many places. All good. All... he smiled as Kris let out a low moan as Adam's fingers brushed his prostate, his moan mixing with Adam's groan. "It all blends together, you know? Reality, fantasy, dreams?"

"I uh still have those jeans."

"You kept them?" Adam grinned and bent his knees. Where was a step stool when you really needed it? "You're sentimental."

"No. I was hoping for a replay some time." He looked over his shoulder and winked. "But right now, I'd settle for your cock inside me."

"So demanding." Curling his arm around Kris, Adam angled his body as Kris pressed back. They both groaned as their bodies met and Adam thrust inside. He laughed out of sheer happiness when Kris immediately wiggled so that he was deeper inside. "Is this the best way to ring in a new year or what?"

"Well, I've got some ideas for tomorrow...rings..." Kris began, then finding a rhythm with Adam, clamped his lips shut before he spoiled the surprise. Right now, the present was present enough. 

 

"It's tomorrow already," Adam noted with a yawn as they stumbled out of the shower and quickly toweled themselves off in the bathroom of their hotel suite. 

"It's been tomorrow for hours, silly." Kris smiled and grabbed Adam's hand to lead him out of the bathroom. "I don't want to go to sleep. Let's stay up. Talk. I don't wanna--"

"If you start singing how you 'Don't want to miss a thing...'" Adam sang the old Aerosmith tune himself for a moment. Then he looked at the bed and flung himself face down on top of it. He moved over when Kris nudged him and crawled in next to him. 

"But I don't." Snuggling into Adam's embrace, Kris flung his leg over Adam's hip and rocked closer. "I'm glad we write music so we can remember our lives, tell our stories forever, so we don't forget."

"Hmm. Thought I was the romantic one." Closing his eyes, Adam savored the feel of Kris' naked body and warm skin against his, the feel of his leg rubbing against his hip, and the soft light kisses Kris was pressing against his chest.

"I think I'm the more sentimental one." 

Opening his mouth to disagree, Adam paused. Kris did have a tendency to look back. And fret. "Well, New Year's is a time to look forward. We have so much to look forward to this year. Your cd, maybe... a new baby..." 

"This year is going to be amazing," Kris whispered, kissing the base of Adam's neck. "Of course, it is. Just like it's been amazing since we got together." 

"Tell me how," Adam demanded, then added, "Please." 

Kissing the tip of Adam's nose, Kris smiled. "I like it when you ask nicely, like a good boy."

"You like it better when I'm a bad boy."

"Shh. Don't tell anyone." Winking, Kris wiggled closer to Adam, gently and lazily rubbing his cock against Adam's hip bone, just enjoying the warmth and feel of skin against skin. "Remember that time we acted out my little fantasy of you driving into Conway on a motorcycle and carrying me off like the big bad outsider?"

"You liked that story." His voice low as he chuckled in remembrance of Kris' reaction to having his fantasy enacted, Adam stroked his hands down Kris' back, over his ass and thighs. "So it's my turn. Tell me a story as we go to sleep." 

"You want a bed-time story?"

"I do. In fact, I'll start. Once upon a time, a lovelorn boy walked into a cafe and much to his surprise, saw a dude in distress."

"Dude in distress?" Kris groaned.

"Shh. I' m the storyteller here. A lonely boy saw a little dude in distress, digging deep to find the coin to placate the coin-eating dragon. Pulling out his dagger--"

Kris laughed. "That was a while later. In the shower. In my teeny tiny apartment."

"Shh. You're interrupting my flow. And alliteration."

"You should stab me with that dagger as a punishment."

"Except that dude in distress does not deem dagger deployment to be a --"

"Oh god, stop!" Kris begged, his laughter muffled against the warmth of Adam's shoulder. He rolled back to look up at Adam's bemused and slightly tipsy face. "My turn. The dude in distress was determined, however, to win the heart of the lovelorn _lad_..."

"Ooooh, alliteration of your own!"

"Shh. _My_ story, if you please. Therefore, the dude in distress called for his steed, alas not-so-trusty and Sir Leno's groom had to lead the steed away. But forsooth!" Kris shot his arm up and pointed his index finger toward the ceiling. 

"Forsooth?"

"Shaddup. Forsooth!" Kris raised his hand again. "The lovelorn lad called forth his more trusty steed, the _mustang_ \--"

"The Mustang."

"Indeed. The Mustang. And the two knights set off on their own quest for pirate treasure, bringing with them doubloons to trade for a small sword."

"The sword!" Adam's eyebrows shot up. "That's what that sword in the airport was about. Our first date!"

"It wasn't our first date. It was the first... sojourn on our quest."

"Quest for what?"

"Twu wuv..." Kris giggled. "What else is every lad and knight looking for?"

"Treasure? Fame? A bigger castle? A bigger...stallion?" Adam shoved his hips forward.

"Hush," Kris demanded even as he lifted his leg higher to allow Adam to press deeper against him. "You're the romantic."

"True. You're the one who needed a bigger castle." Sliding his hand around Kris' waist, Adam slid it over his ass and between his legs. "Then again, a mouse would have needed a bigger castle." Gently teasing Kris' soft skin and circling, he added, "For his precious treasure chest." 

"Nah. I needed a bigger dagger for my treasure chest." Cupping his hand around Adam's cock, Kris grinned, then bent forward and kissed Adam's chest. "But in truth, the dude in distress -- while happy about the size of said dagger, very happy..." He stroked Adam's cock, more to be close than to have sex. "Was looking for a heart to hold in safe-keeping in his treasure chest." 

"And because the dude in distress was sweet and sexy and funny," Bending his head, Adam gave Kris a soft kiss, then another. He smiled as they pulled back to stare at each other. Gently touching Kris' chest, Adam continued, "The lovelorn lad gave him his heart--"

Curling his hand around Adam's, Kris finished. "And got his in return. The lad and the little dude continued on their quest, finding a castle with grottoes and a fair damsel and a beautiful princess."

"And life was good."

"Life was wonderful." Kris shook his head. "Especially when the dude learned to slay the dragons of his past. But then the lovelorn lad became a tetch obsessed with another quest -- the quest for perfect music -- and he traveled too hard and too long and the dude became sad and sorrowfullllll...." Kris pouted and looked up under his lashes. 

"Oh brother." Adam rolled his eyes. "Except that the dude was, if not obsessed, quite busy on his own quest for perfect music."

"Luckily for them both, however," Kris started again with a determined look at Adam. "The dude was able to pursue two quests at once because _he_ had the ability to multitask."

"The dude was a multi-talented knight indeed," Adam agreed with a smirk. He brought his hand up to his mouth, licked his fingertips, then teased Kris' nipple as it grew hard under his ministrations and Kris shivered. "Look at the little dude. He can tell a story while he's being pleasured. He should be knighted!" 

"I haven't done it yet. Don't get ahead of yourself," Kris warned, fighting back a moan, then surrendering and arching back. He groaned loudly when Adam's mouth kissed down his chest to gently lick his nipple. Parting his legs, he urged Adam between them, wanting just to feel him close. "Damn. How's your...uh...oh yeah, right _there_... dagger?" 

"I could put it inside your treasure chest again tonight. Or maybe tomorrow."

"Mmm...It's already tomorrow." Kris lifted his mouth, searching for a kiss. Sighing happily when Adam's lips met his, his eyes closed, Kris kissed Adam until he heard him make that soft little sound that always simultaneously hardened his cock and softened his heart, a needy loving little sound that hovered somewhere between a moan and an endearment. "And we have all those tomorrows, don't we?"

"We do," Adam agreed, looking down into Kris' warm brown eyes, seeing the love and need he knew was mirrored in his own. 

"Kiss me some more. Sweet and slow..." Kris murmured, his senses spinning as his pulse seemed to thicken to syrup and his tongue tasted only sweetness on Adam's lips. "Like when we spilled pineapple all over while we were on the blanket on the beach and you licked it off of me, 'member? Our last morning there?"

Nodding, Adam once more pressed his lips to Kris, before finishing, "The no-longer-distressed dude and the not-so-lovelorn boy kissed on the beach of their tropical paradise and made plans for a new baby and new music."

"And then they lived happily ever after." Kris sighed as Adam gently stroked his hair and kissed his neck. He looked down and smiled as he saw traces of glitter still in Adam's hair. "And their happily ever after included friends, family, children, music, and....glitter."

"Well, what kind of happily ever after wouldn't include glitter?" Adam whispered sleepily as Kris climbed into his usual place, lying on top of him. "Happiness should sparkle."

 

Flinging his arm over his face, Adam groaned the next morning. "Why are you dressed? In plaid? It hurts my eyes. Why did you open the window? Why am I looking at sunlight? Why, why, why?" 

"Why are you such a whiner?" Kris retorted. When Adam pulled his arm away from one eye to glare at him, Kris laughed. "I'll go to Starbucks and get us some coffee," he offered.

"Ooooh, sounds great," Adam mumbled, burying his face in the pillow. "Give me coffee and I'll love you forever." 

"I hope so," Kris whispered, patting the box in his pocket as he opened the door. 

 

**Drops...**

 

Humming happily as he walked down the sidewalk, Kris reached for his phone. 

"Hey, Allen! Who you callin'?" 

Kris jumped as he turned around. "Geez, Cale, you startled me! I thought you were a fuckin' pap for a second!"

"Chill, dude. You're a little jumpy. You finally gonna ask the question?" Cale asked, elbowing Kris to get him moving again. 

"Yup. I was callin' Geoffrey to let him know I was finally doin' it."

"Well, good. Because if you don't get a move on, everyone's gonna know but Adam."

"How?"

"Last night, me and Laney and Geoffrey were talkin' to Seacrest."

"What the hell?" Kris shook his head. "We shoulda never let y'all near the champagne. Seacrest. Ugh."

"Hey, we didn't give out any deets about the proposal or the wedding! Which we couldn't since there hasn't been a proposal yet...." Cale grinned triumphantly at Kris. "Therefore no wedding plans. Anyway, we gave him all sorts of red herrings."

"Yeah, sure." Kris sighed. He really had to propose this morning before Adam turned on E! News and saw speculation about their wedding. That would not be pretty. "Good thing I'm doin' it this morning. Speaking of which, when are _you_ gonna ask Laney?"

"Ha. I'm soooo on top of that situation!" Cale smiled as they hurried down the sidewalk. Kris was in a damn rush. Typical Kris. He'd put off doing something forever, then rush around like a chicken with his head cut off at the last minute. "When you and Leila and Laney were in Tiffany's discussin' the design for Adam's ring, I paid attention to what Laney seemed to like and placed my own order."

"Whoa." Kris glanced up at Cale's smug face in disbelief. "You kept that a secret from me?"

"You'd spill to Laney!" Cale accused with a laugh when Kris glared at him.

"No, I wouldn't," Kris argued. "I can keep secrets. Better than y'all! I kept Adam's vacation a secret and his birthday party a secret a few years ago, remember?"

"Yeah. But Laney knew those secrets." Wagging his finger in Kris' face, Cale reminded him, "C'mon. You know how she is when she thinks there's a secret she doesn't know. Determined and tenacious." 

"Oh. Well I _can_ keep a secret." 

"No -- Wait. Guess you can. You kept the secret that you were gay from everyone back in Conway."

"See?" Kris grimaced, then shook his head, then changed the subject. "So when are you gonna ask her?"

"Haven't decided. Valentine's Day, mebbe? What do you think?" Cale asked as he pulled open the door to Starbucks. 

"That'd be cool, but mebbe..." Kris bit his lip as they crossed the threshold. He didn't want to criticize someone else's proposal plans since he hadn't done such a stellar job of it himself, but didn't everyone propose on Valentine's Day? 

Correctly reading the hesitation on Kris' face as they got on line, Cale sighed and asked, "Too cliche?"

"Yeah." Trying to peer around the line of people to see how far it was to the counter, Kris frowned. This line was taking too damn long. He needed to get back and just do it already. "Lane tends to like things that aren't so expected, ya know?" 

"Hmm. How about when we all go to Venice for Carnevale like you and Adam have been talking about? That'd be memorable, right? Venice? The costumes, the masks, a ball? A freaking ball! That'd be cool, right?"

"I'd say so." Kris grinned in relief as they took a step forward in line. Bouncing from his heels to his toes and back again, he noted, "Adam is so excited about the costumes. I'm even gettin' excited. He told me that mine has a cape!"

"No way!" Cale gaped. "A cape! I think I need a cape."

"I think we all need capes!" Kris agreed enthusiastically, then seeing that the line seemed stalled once again, remembered he had intended to call Geoffrey and reached for his phone. "Damn it. I think I forgot my phone back at the hotel."

"Dude, you are hopeless with that phone!" Cale rolled his eyes. Then he patted Kris on the shoulder. "Hey, I'm teasin' you. You're about to pop from excitement, aren't you?"

 

 

_bbbrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr_

_bbbrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr_

_bbbrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr_

"Damn it!" Adam exclaimed, sitting up and flailing around for the phone with only one eye open. He reached for the nightstand and nearly fell off the bed, saving himself only by shoving his arm out. His hand hit the floor with a jarring bump. He blinked in confusion. Why was the carpet in their bedroom some bizarre grey pattern and... Oh. Not home. Hotel. He flung himself back on the bed, then turned to glare at the nightstand. Who the hell was calling? "Well, might as well look. Probably Geoffrey telling me I'm banned at ABC again..." He grabbed the phone, flicked at the screen and read the message and began muttering to himself. "Huh? Oh. This is Kris' phone, not mine. But... huh?"

 

 

"... And I need an empty cup, please?" Kris asked, nearly wanting to reach across the counter and grab one for himself. This was taking too damn long. They'd taken nearly forty-five minutes to reach the front of the line.

"Sure. What for?" The barista asked casually.

"Well... My boyfriend and I met in a Starbucks and I'm gonna ask him to marry me by putting a ring in a cup! I got this really great custom ring made at Tiffany's and my best friend and his mom helped me design it and they've been bugging me about asking, but I am doing it this morning. With a cup, because that'll be meaningful, ya know?" Kris said in a rush of excitement, then clapped his hand over his mouth. Oh shit. He could and had kept his mouth shut about so many other things, but this one time, here he was spilling the beans. Hopefully no one here was a Glambert who would recognize him. 

"No way!" The girl shrieked. That was Kris, Adam Lambert's boyfriend, but she couldn't admit to knowing that because it would be such a tourist thing to do. And she was a New Yorker and therefore way cooler than acting like a celebrity was some big whoop like some tourist. "That's so cute!"

"Uh-oh. Too cute?"

"I don't think so!" The barista shook her head as she worked on their order.

"Nah," Cale agreed. "He loves that story of how you two met."

"I know he does. I don't think how we met is as important as the fact that we met, but it's what matters to him that's important right now." 

The barista smiled. Adam Lambert's boyfriend was as sweet as he'd always seemed, when he wasn't trying to avoid reporters, that is. "Awww...."

Kris blushed as the barista smiled at him like he was a particularly cute puppy and straightened his shoulders. "I was gonna write his name on it -- like y'all do with the order? Only I was gonna write the proposal under his name. Can I borrow the pen?"

Cale laughed as the barista handed over the cup and a pen. "He'll love it. And then you could keep the cup as a memento!" he suggested, knowing how Kris kept little souvenirs of his life. 

"I could." Kris blushed as he took the pen from the barista, took a deep breath and began writing. "I still have a souvenir from our first date. It's a little plastic sword -- you know the kind you put in drinks to spear an olive or something? I kept it."

 

Rubbing the stabbing pain in his stomach, Adam continued throwing clothes into the suitcase in a rush. He bit his lip and paused, then reached for the phone and read the lines again. Unbelievable. He couldn't believe it. It was deja vu all over again. Or a bad dream. His worst nightmare.

 

"Hey, Adammmmm....." Kris sing-songed as the door closed behind him with a quiet, but solid thud. He kept his eyes on the coffee, worried about spilling it on the carpet. "Wake up. I bring coffeeeee...."

"Oh, I'm awake."

"Adam?" Kris looked up, the tone of Adam's voice snapping him to attention. He looked up and saw Adam standing near the window, his back to Kris. He was wearing a pair of black jeans and a dark grey sweater he was clutching around him with one hand while holding a phone in the other hand. Kris' phone. "Oh, thanks for finding my phone. Hey, turn around. I wanna give you the coffee and ask--"

"Kris." Adam turned around slowly, counting in his head to keep from screaming, to keep from crying. He just had to make it through this. Just. Make. It. Through. Hold it together. And maybe... Maybe there was an explanation. Kris just had to tell him. Fight back. That's it. Fight back and tell Adam he was being stupid and crazy. That was it. So, Adam decided, he'd just fling out a challenge and see how Kris responded. 

"Ohmigod, what's wrong?" Kris gaped at the ravaged expression on Adam's face. He looked as though someone had hit him hard in the nuts or someone had died--- "What is it? Is it your mom or dad or my mom or or..." He gulped. "Emmaline--"

"Funny you should bring up Emmaline. But, no. None of them."

"Then, who? Who? Who..." Kris gulped and hurried across the room to set the cardboard tray down on the small table. "Who died? Or is sick?"

"Me, I guess." Adam touched his stomach. "I've already vomited once and I probably will again."

"What? What's the matter?" Kris rushed forward, reaching out for Adam, then stopped abruptly when Adam held up a hand and looked at him with... He didn't even understand the look. It was... what _was_ it? "What's going on? You look like you're in terrible pain. Why did you say it was funny I brought up Emmaline?"

"Because now I'm wondering why you kept on about having another child and suggested you be the biological father? Are you Brian?"

"Am I _Brian_?" Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "What the hell is goin' on? I'm _Kris!_ Are you... Ohmigod. Did you hit your head or something? I'll call Lane--"

"I've already called Lane. You know..." Adam began, keeping his voice low. Control. He was going to be in control. And he was going to get to the point. Eventually. He had to work his way to it first, though. Prepare himself. "Historically speaking, the general public used to consider everyone in the acting profession to be a _whore_."

"Ooookay..." Kris said slowly. What was going on? Why was Adam staring at him with eyes that were a terrible, scary combination of anger and fear and resignation? Why did Adam's voice sound so tight and strained? And why was he talking about acting? And whores? Wait... No. It couldn't be. He was just being paranoid. 

"I guess in your case, you decided to combine both professions. Acting and being a whore." Adam smiled mirthlessly as he realized why, so long ago, Kris had been so fucking hyper about being a slut and not a whore. "Then again, whores are nothing more than actors who use their bodies, aren't they? Whores."

 _Whores_.

"I...what?" Kris shook his head, trying to pay attention, trying to listen, but the sound of something clear and pure shattering in his ears at the sound of that word, the certainty in Adam's voice when he said that word, made it hard to hear anything else. The crash as everything dropped and fell muted everything in his world. 

"You were right. You really can multitask, can't you? No _wonder_ you got _paid_ so well," Adam spat. "Then again, whores usually do." 

"This can't be happening..." Kris moaned, looking down, away, anywhere but at Adam. He closed his eyes. Maybe this was all a bad dream and if he opened his eyes, he'd wake up. He opened his eyes and no... his suitcase. His suitcase was by the door and and and Adam still looked devastated. And furious. As furious as his father had that day on the porch. Only this wasn't a porch and unlike that day, he had no warning, so he wasn't expecting this... Then again, hadn't he? Ever since the beginning. 

"How...odd that you'd say that. Because that's exactly what I said. So. You need me to go back to the beginning? Because that's what I did. Went back to the beginning. Fine." Adam took a deep breath and looked away from the frozen shock on Kris' face, the jagged hurt in his eyes. Kris wasn't the one who'd been deceived, dammit! He was. Right from the start. "So I guess you were lying to me right from the beginning, the day we met in Starbucks. When I asked you if you were a singer, dancer or an actor in Starbucks that day and you told me you were a singer. You were, I mean, _are_ really an actor."

 

_"What are you trying to break into? Acting or singing or dancing?" Adam asked after they'd sat down at a small table, Lane at the table next to them in some vain attempt at pretending to give him privacy and Kris seemed lost in contemplating how red his cheeks could get._

_"Singing. But how'd you know?" Kris' head snapped back to Adam. He couldn't believe he was sitting with Adam Fucking Lambert. All the times he'd fantasized about meeting him and now... It had been that easy? And that humiliating?_

_"Everyone's trying to be someone they're not in LA. Or someone they're not yet. Or something they want to be." Adam shrugged._

_Kris blanched. "That's... cynical." And also, true, he added silently after a second's thought._

_"Which is something I'm not. Just honest and if the truth appears cynical, doesn't mean it's not the truth."_

 

"I...The truth is..." Kris began. He shook his head and took a step back. He needed to leave. He needed to... Everything he'd ever feared was right there in Adam's face. Rejection. "I don't know how to..." 

"Really?" Adam held up Kris' phone. "Then I will because the texts on here, the emails, your accounts -- they tell the story, the truth. You really should have a better password than my first name and the date we fucking met!" Adam yelled. He took a deep, shuddering breath and called upon every bit of acting skill he'd ever possessed. He wasn't going to give Kris any ammunition for some tell-all book in which this scene was the heartrending one in which he broke down. Oh, hell no. He was going to protect himself. "So. Here's a tip. You shouldn't use the same password for everything, the password you gave me. Now, _that_ was not very smart of you. Almost makes me wonder if you wanted to get caught, especially the way you kept accidentally leaving your phone behind--" 

Kris cried out, "What? How--"

"How? You left your phone here. Two seconds after you left, it buzzed with a text. It was still on, I was half-asleep and thought it was my phone, so I looked at it, without thinking. Read this text from Geoffrey. That's how it all started."

 

_  
"Huh?" Adam rubbed his eyes and read the text again. He knew it was Geoffrey since Geoffrey always texted in all caps, but what the hell did it mean?_

_K: CONGRATS ON ONCE AGAIN MAKING SURE THE GB DIDNT APPEAR IN PUBLIC LAST NIGHT. AS USUAL, MADE DEPOSIT IN YOUR ACCOUNT. I HAVE AN IDEA WHAT YOULL BE USING IT FOR THIS TIME! T IS BLOODY EXPENSIVE! HURRY UP WITH THE Q! KEEPING THE SECRET IS KILLING ME. G_

_Geoffrey had made a deposit in some account for Kris? For something from last night? For keeping the GB... Oh no. The glambulge, that silly nickname and... what did Geoffrey and Kris have going on? Some bet? Nah. It must be a joke. Geoffrey wouldn't give Kris five thousand dollars for... Adam grimaced. Giving him a blowjob in the trailer. Okay, he knew that the little 'tradition' he and Kris had before the show was an open joke amongst the band, but it was really... low class to have a bet about it. He must be mistaken. Geoffrey wouldn't... Adam bit his lip. If Geoffrey and Kris had made a bet about Kris giving him a blowjob, it was totally unfair of Kris because Kris could make sure he won the money back... Money. The root of all evil, right? For the love of money. Money can't buy you love, buy you love... Money, money, money._

_He flicked the screen and froze. Money._

_A text message from a Peachtree Bank. Peachtree Bank? He knew Kris' finances and Kris didn't have an account at some Peachtree Bank. "Well, curiosity killed the cat, but I'm no cat. I hate cats..." Adam muttered as he flicked open the text message._

_Kristopher Allen: An electronic deposit has been credited to your account in the amount of $5000.00 Your current balance is $109,748.21. To view your most recent statement, click here and enter your password._

_"Kris has a balance of over one hundred thousand dollars in an account at some Peachtree Bank?" Adam blurted out, incredulous. He knew Kris had money saved in his accounts at the same bank where Adam and Dani kept their accounts; he knew generally how much Kris had, just as Kris knew how much he had, plus what they had in a joint, household account. Maybe this was a new account at a new bank? But even still... "Where the hell did he get an extra hundred grand? Oh no..." He sat down hard on the bed. It couldn't be. Kris couldn't be another guy who..._

_No. It was _Kris_ , for godssakes. There was probably a mistake. Had to be. But... he had to know. He had to know it was a new bank with a new account, that Kris had just transferred money from one bank to another and hadn't mentioned it to Adam. After all, he didn't need to mention details like changing banks the minute he did them. And maybe Kris had signed a record deal and taken an advance, then hadn't told Adam because they were in such heavy rehearsal for New Year's Eve. Yeah, that was probably it. _

_Adam nodded. He was just being paranoid, those insecurities from his past and from those guys who had used him were rearing their ugly heads again the way Kris and Lane and Dani and his mom and well, everyone said. But just because you were paranoid didn't mean that people weren't out to use you. Proof was in those dick pics, right?_

_But then again, this was Kris. He was being ridiculous and giving himself whiplash. He just had to prove it to himself and then he and Kris would laugh about it, about his paranoia, later. Kris would soothe him, tell him his insecurities were ridiculous and probably make love to him freckle by freckle the way he always did when Adam let his fears get the better of him. That was it. Later, they'd laugh. But right now?_

_He had to know. Now._

_Adam lifted a finger, watching it as if it were connected to someone else's body and pressed the link. A moment later and a screen for this Peachtree Bank opened and asked for his password. Pressing his lips together, Adam entered in the password Kris used for everything and exclaimed in disbelief. Kris not only had that much money in his account now, he'd had this account for_ years _? For how long? Exactly? When had this started? And why? How?_

_Adam kept scrolling back, screen after screen, deposits and withdrawals, but focused on the deposits. Almost always in the amount of five thousand dollars, sometimes more and sometimes less, sometimes many months would go by with no deposits, then there would be a bunch of them, more often in the summers of years when... Tour dates? No, no. It couldn't be. Who would have paid him extra and for what? Geoffrey? And how far back, how...?_

_THUD_

_Adam watched the phone shift and fall in the rumpled bedcovers. He had dropped it. When he'd seen that the first deposit went back to the day after they'd met. In Starbucks. Accidentally._

_Only. Apparently. It wasn't. An accident._

_It wasn't the universe making sure their stars were aligned._

_It wasn't even just the most wonderful random coincidence._

_It was... planned and paid for._

_And had continued to be paid for... for years. Including this morning for last night._

_"This can't be happening..." Adam moaned, feeling the heat flush up from his chest and then down over his abdomen. He covered his mouth and ran to the bathroom._

__  
Kris covered his mouth and swallowed, the smell of hot coffee in the air nauseating him. Oh no, oh no, oh no. He froze, felt his insides begin to freeze as though he'd chugged down an iced mocha frappe too fast and the cold spread from his stomach up to his chest, making it hard to breathe. It was all over. His suitcase was by the door. Just like last time, except that Adam had packed for him instead of flinging his shit out the door. Guess that was an improvement. Even if his heart felt like it had been clawed out of his chest by jagged teeth.

Seeing the flicker of realization in Kris' eyes, Adam let out a breath -- the last gasp of hope -- and let it go. "You never loved me, did you?" 

"Adam!" Kris approached Adam, hands outstretched, finally able to move. "No, don't think that, God, no--"

"Is it or is it not true that Geoffrey paid you to meet me, to...seduce me into thinking..." Adam swallowed. "Like some charity case who couldn't get his own boyfriend?"

"No, no! I love you!" 

"Did he pay you extra every time you said that? Did you get paid extra for giving me a blow job? Did he subtract from your wages every time you got inkind payment in the form of a blowjob from me? Did you have to turn in a time sheet detailing how many blowjobs, how many hand jobs, how many fucks--"

"No! Listen, please. It's not like that--"

"It's not like that email from Geoffrey telling you that the fact I got an erection on stage the night you got food poisoning meant you were failing the terms of the agreement? "

"It was a joke, that's all--"

"You got paid five thousand dollars every time I didn't get an erection on stage?"

"What? No, no, that's not--" Kris gulped and in the second of quiet, Adam pounced. 

"Really? Then why did Geoffrey put that much money in your account? I checked."

"It's a joke and Geoffrey, you know him, how he feels about independence--"

"A joke? A damn expensive joke. Going back five and a half _years_?" Adam tapped the phone onto his open hand. "I looked. I looked at it all because you use the same damn password for everything. My name. Which I guess is appropriate since it's me who gave you the password to a better life, right?"

"No, you're--" Kris swallowed and shoved his hands in his pockets as the buzzing in his ears from Adam's non-stop accusations and the look -- that horrible horrible hurt on his face -- took away his ability to think. "Listen--" 

"I'm right. I looked, Kris. I looked. At your accounts at this bank I didn't even know you had an account with. I went back. Years. Years! And even before that first time in the green room at the Jingle Ball, even before that..." Adam paused and looked up, willing himself not to cry. He counted to ten, bit the inside of his cheek, then looked back and shook his head. "And this is what kills me most. I went all the way back. To the first time we met at Starbucks? I may not have been a mathlete in high school, but I can read a bank account and if I'm reading the bank account right, you got five thousand dollars for that meeting, didn't you?"

Swallowing hard and backing away, Kris nodded and whispered, "I did, but..." Then he looked down at his feet. His sneakers were dirty. He wanted to tell Adam to read the bank accounts some more, to pay attention, but he couldn't. He was frozen. 

"But what? Damn it, talk!" Adam yelled. He clenched his hand, felt Kris' phone dig into his palm and tossed it towards the bed. The bed. He looked away quickly. Damn it, Kris, fight back. Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me... "I mean it, Allen. Talk!" 

Frozen. Just like that day on his parents' front lawn. Kris couldn't get the words out, the words that might make a difference. Maybe because they wouldn't, not really. Then, the only words that would have made a difference were, "I'm not gay." Which would have been a lie. And now the only words that would make a difference were, "I didn't do that." Which would also be a lie. He looked back up slowly, his head feeling heavy, like he was wearing a concrete helmet and blinked as he realized Adam was still talking. Of course, because Adam talked all the time. Filling in the blanks of silence. With... a story. That began, "Once upon a time" and last night, had ended with, "Happily ever after." What was that line, he'd read once, that the key to a happy ending was knowing when to stop the story? He should've stopped it last night, told the truth about their beginnings--

"So when we met at Starbucks that day, it was no coincidence was it? Tell me the damn truth!" Adam demanded, slapping his hand against the wall. Kris was withdrawing into himself. Not fighting back. Damn it, if would at least fight back... Fight for them. If only. If he... But then, what could Kris say? He had taken the money. He was... not his beloved. Not his boyfriend. He was just another guy who'd used him for what he could get? Why, why? Why did he not seem able to attract decent guys? Why did he only end up with users? "The truth! It wasn't a coincidence. It was a set-up. Lane didn't know, but Geoffrey and Hannah did, right? It was a set up. Confirm it. Do me that courtesy!"

Kris jumped, then took another step back. "No, Lane didn't know. She's never known," he admitted. "They... That... The beginning... Geoffrey and Hannah told me you got coffee there on your breaks and that you were going to be there that day so...."

"Oh my god. It was a lie from the moment we met." Adam closed his eyes. It was true. He forced himself to look again, to look at Kris and see him. But he didn't look any different. He looked sad and guilty and frozen, but still... He bit back a sob and snapped, "Did you even need my thirty-eight cents or--" Adam bit his words off and looked away, spotting the three cups of coffee in the cardboard carry-out tray on the table. Three? Well, why not? Apparently their relationship had never been just the two of them.

"I did! I was out of money. Totally. But that's not what I need most, then or now. I need you--"

Making a chopping motion with his hand, Adam stared at Kris. "You know I can understand being poor and desperate. I can. Been there, done that, too fucking poor to afford the fucking tee-shirt. I can also understand being so... driven that you'd do almost anything to succeed, but damn it!" He took a step forward, then another, watching with savage satisfaction as Kris backed away, as his back hit the door. "Fuck you, Kris! How could you--"

"I love you!"

"You took money! For five years! And our family. Emmaline and..." Adam took in a breath, willing his voice not to hitch, willing himself not to cry before Kris left. "And you! You bitching and moaning about having another kid! Why -- so you get me tied to a child and then blackmail me like Brian?"

"God, NO!" Kris yelled, taking a step forward. Damn it, if Adam would just shut up, maybe he could explain. Maybe. "No. I wasn't desperate, okay, I was. But I didn't stay with you for the money. I mean, I didn't even meet you for the money, the money was... but that wasn't why, I mean, the minute I met you, that wasn't why--"

"Right. Because you took one look at me and fell in love over thirty-eight cents."

"Yes!" Kris fell silent. He stood there and said nothing. Because that too was the truth. There was nothing more to it than that. The truth. It was that simple. But Adam... Adam was so angry, he'd never believe him and after all, it had probably been too good to be true. Kris reached behind his back for the door handle, giving one last look at the cardboard tray with two cups of his coffee and the empty cup with his future in it. 

"I don't believe you. You never said that before!" Adam cried out, seeing Kris' hand on the door. He wasn't going to fight back. He was just going to leave? That meant...

"I didn't think you'd believe me!"

"You didn't think I'd believe that? You..." Adam forced himself to stay put. To stay controlled, to show no weakness that could be used against him later. "You owe me thirty-eight cents and the last five years of my life back. I'm keeping your phone to make sure you can't use that against me, but your suitcase is next to the door. Take it and get the hell out."


	57. Washing Many Loads of Dirty Laundry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 57: Washing Many Loads of Dirty Laundry**

Seeing the pile of sheets and blankets on the bed that they'd been cuddling in just an hour ago, Adam snorted in disgust at himself. Blinking rapidly, he took long strides across the room and stripped the bed in a few hard tugs and tossed the bedclothes on the floor, on the other side of the bed. Out of sight. 

Out of sight. He needed to disappear. Now, now he finally understood Kris' need to leave Conway, the scene of the crime and just go. Somewhere, anywhere. But not home, no. If he couldn't stand looking at the sheets on this hotel bed, how would he stand seeing their bed in their home? Maybe he'd stay with Neil for a while. Or Mom. Just go somewhere and hide before all this shit hit the fan.

 

Wiping the sweat from his forehead before it dripped into his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt, Kris blinked and hoped his contacts would stay in place. His eyes were watery. This carpet was hideous. And why was he thinking about carpet when his life had just ended? 

"Kris."

"Cale?" Kris blinked as he saw Cale standing in the hallway in front of him. "What's.... Where's Lane? Is she gonna kill me?"

"Lane is in Geoffrey's room, reaming him out with Teresa's assistance. I thought she was about to take his head off after she got off the phone with Adam." Wincing, Cale spread his hands, then gestured down the hallway when Kris seemed frozen in place. "It was a bloodbath in there, so I thought I'd wait for you... If this is where you ended up. I was hopin' you two were going to be in there, fighting this out..."

"Of course I'm here." Kris pointed around the hallway. "On the outside. I got thrown out again. He promised..." He bit his lip hard.

Cale patted Kris' shoulder, bent down and said in a low tone, "Don't want to kick you when you're down, but I think Adam feels like you broke promises too."

"Did he say that to Lane?"

"Yeah." Gently pushing Kris to the right, Cale frowned as he recalled the confusion, devastation, then determination on Lane's face as she'd listened to Adam less than an hour ago. 

_"Lane..." Adam began, then stopped as his throat grew tight._

_"Adam, are you okay?" Lane sat up straight in bed and then got out, every instinct telling her that Adam was not okay._

_"No. I..." Adam cleared his throat. "I need to know. Did you know about...Kris?"_

_"What about Kris? Is he hurt or..."_

_"No."_

_Lane breathed a sigh of relief. "What's going on?"_

_"He... I got this text message. And... I should warn you. I'm about to have a fight with him and-- "_

_"So what?" Adam and Kris might fight and often did in a manner usually hilarious to those around them. She frowned as she heard the sound of gasping breaths in the silence; it sounded like Adam was trying not to cry._

_"Everyone's going to know. Again. That I'm an idiot."_

_"What? What's the matter? It's not like he's going to sell the story of one of your mad fights to the tabloids or your BFF Perez--"_

_"That might happen, but no..." Adam groaned. "Oh god, it probably will happen. It probably will. He broke his promises to me. Everything--"_

_"Adam, what the hell is going on?" Lane asked, ignoring Cale's whispered questions, grabbing for her glasses them aiming her remote at the tv and turning it to E!_

_"I... " Adam swallowed hard, the taste of bitterness making him gag. He forced himself to summarize. "The gist of it is that I need you."_

_"What do you need? Tell me." Lane frowned at the tv -- nothing was running across the bottom feed ticker. Yet. Adam was being paranoid. Probably. Hopefully. After all, this was_ Kris _. "I'll help you, if you explain to me what's going on."_

_"Thanks so much." Adam choked back a sob, glad that only Lane was hearing this._

_"Adam, darling..." Lane sat down hard. The last time she remembered Adam crying was... years ago and out of frustration. "Talk to me."_

_Adam wiped his eyes. "What I need you to do most is go back to LA and over to our... my house. Dani is in San Diego with Emmaline at her parents and I don't want Emmaline to see this. I want you to go and .... clean out everything of... his. Everything. Today. Change the security code."_

_"Oh, Adam, no..." Lane moaned. "How, what... No, first you have to tell me what's going on. Maybe we can solve this problem. Why do you want me to do this? It's behind his back, isn't it? You have to tell me why."_

_"Behind_ his _back? Ha! He lied to me, Laney. For years. For ever. He lied to me. From the beginning. About the beginning. That day we met him in Starbucks? I think he was paid to meet me. He and Geoffrey, they were in some sort of scheme together. I just found out. Via text message." Adam stared at the other phone in his hand, wishing he could turn into the Hulk and smush it to bits... He kept squeezing as he hurriedly told the story to Lane._

 

His hand clenched around the handle of his suitcase as he followed Cale down the hall, Kris mumbled, "I don't know where to go. What to do. I don't. I don't have my truck or... Should I go back home, but where's home and..."

Stopping in front of the door to Geoffrey's room, Cale pointed back towards the hotel room Kris had just left. Lane wasn't the only one who could solve problems, so could he. He jabbed his finger in the air. "How going 'bout back in there to finish the fight?"

"I think the fight is finished when you get thrown out." Kris knocked on the door and stared uncomprehendingly when Teresa opened it and pulled him inside. He blinked when he saw Lane and Geoffrey talking near the windows. 

Cale followed, still arguing. "The fight's not over when you get out. Not necessarily. Not if you get _back_ into the ring."

"No.I can't And...Ring..." Kris bit his lip as Lane turned around and glared at him, then slid her phone open. She was probably calling Adam. Adam should've been calling her, eager to show her -- "The ring..."

"Where is it?"

"In the cup. It's still in the cup." Kris shuddered as he watched Lane listen to whatever Adam was telling her. He looked at his hands. Not long ago, he'd been carrying his future in a cup and walking in a door and then...

 

**Bang  
Bang  
Bang**

"Adam, let me in. It's Neil. I'm not giving up." Neil raised his fist once again to pound on the door. Lane had just made it clear in her quick and efficient way that his life depended upon getting into Adam's room and controlling the damage. He wasn't afraid of much, but he was afraid of Lane. And what he might find inside. 

"Fuck it!" Adam exclaimed as he ran across the room to pull open the door. The last thing he needed was another scene and -- He sucked in a breath as he saw the concerned and sympathetic look on his brother's face. It must be bad if Neil looked sad. Great, his little brother felt bad for him. He went back into the room and asked over his shoulder, "Did Lane call you? Is she doing what I asked? Did she tell you? Are you here to keep me from doing something stupid?"

"Yes, not yet, a little bit and pretty much, respectively." Neil looked at his brother as the silence lengthened like a stretched rubberband, the tension inevitably going to snap. And hurt. Adam looked like he'd been hurt badly, run over. His face was pale, his eyes were wet and his mouth was in a tight line. Worst of all, he was silent. A silent Adam was a bad bad thing. No wonder Lane had called him. If there was one skill set Neil knew he possessed, it was getting his brother going. Yelling was far preferable to silence when it came to Adam's moods. He glanced around the room and spotting coffee on the table, he asked, "Is it okay if I have one of these coffees? I think I can use the caffeine."

"Sure. Kr--" Adam swallowed hard, then telling himself, _It's just a name, you can say it, just a name, just say_... finished, "He brought them back for us. They'll be cold."

"I can nuke it." Reaching for one of the cups, Neil stopped as he saw the writing. Oh shit, this day was shaping up to be way worse than he'd thought. "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Do you know what's in that cup...." he asked, deliberately keeping his voice low.

"What cup?" Adam dug his fingers into his scalp and looked down at the floor. Why the hell was Neil yapping about coffee cups when his life was falling apart? Literally, falling apart. He felt broken, in pieces.

"The third cup." Neil picked it up and held it out to his brother. "This is Kris' handwriting. Look at it," he urged when Adam kept his eyes on the floor. "Kris wrote on it--"

"What? 'Coffee for a sucker'?"

"Uh, yeah, but no. Not even close." Tapping his index finger against the cup, Neil urged. "Look at it. I don't think there's coffee in here. Do it. I'm not going to give up. You know me, I can keep talking and talking and --"

"Alright!" Adam yelled. He opened his eyes and tilted his head, trying to read Kris' scrawl, as indicepherable as always. He read aloud, "Adam...Will... You.... _WHAAAT?_ "

"It looks like a proposal and this..." Neil shook the cup. _Rattlerattle_ "Doesn't sound like coffee."

Turning his back on the cup and taking long strides away from the table, Adam sat down on the bed, then jerked his body away and stumbled towards the window. "I don't care," he flung defiantly over his shoulder, wishing it were true. He crossed his arms over his chest and put his hands on his shoulders. "Why should I care? He didn't even care enough to fight back, you know?"

"Okaaay." Neil waited and when Adam said nothing more and looked back down at his feet or the floor, Neil frowned. Adam's face was tight, his arms were crossed and he was hunched over. If a textbook needed an illustration of closed off body language, Adam would fit the bill. He wasn't going to listen to a thing right now. So maybe he needed to _see_. Reaching for the lid of the cup, Neil pulled it off and then whistled. "It's a robin's egg blue box. Classic, old school... Kris. It's from Tiffany's, you know?" He pulled out the box and held it out to Adam.

Seeing that the box was a ring box, Adam swallowed hard, rubbed his eyes, then turned his head away. "I. Don't. Care."

"Well, I'm nosy. I'm opening it." Neil flicked open the box and then stared at it. "Holy hell. This is... perfect." A lot of time and thought had gone into the ring, just like the time and thought Kris put into Adam's birthday parties or that secret vacation. To say nothing of money and... Oh fuck. Oh fuck. But it wasn't money or the ring or the vacations that was important here. As he'd explained to Lane, it wasn't Kris' planning and preparation that made Neil believe Kris was the real deal. "Adam, look. This is from Tiffany's. _Custom._ Do you know what that means--"

"No, it's not important. The ring doesn't mean anything."

"Seriously, look at it." Neil shoved the open ring box under Adam's nose. "You'll love it."

" _Et tu, Brute?_ " Adam turned his head, closing his eyes, wishing he could un-see the band with four slim rows of banding on either side-- platinum, black titanium, pave white diamonds, black titanium -- and within ohmigod black diamonds, it was fucking _gorgeous_ , just what he would have designed for himself, well, except maybe for the band of pave which looked like Kris' favorite and oh god and and now and now and now he was wishing his imagination had not immediately conjured up an image of Kris offering it to him and-- "It's just a ring. Doesn't mean a thing. He lied to me. He lied."

"Maybe there's a truth greater than the lie. Pay attention. Because... this ring..." Neil shook the box. "This ring -- this wedding ring -- is telling you something true. I may not know squat about jewelry, but I know when something is meaningful. And this ring is telling you--"

"That California is a community property state and that if we got married, he's entitled to half of everything I own or make?"

"Is that what you think?" Neil watched and saw the confusion, shock, and anger on his brother's face. Adam was angry and when he got angry he went on the offense. That was his nature. He was still in the first stage of processing and between his anger and his fears, this stage might take a while. And his anger would make him more stubborn than usual. But Neil had to try. Adam might not listen to him now, but experience told Neil that Adam might remember and think about it later. "I think it's telling you about how Kris spends his money. Because this was not cheap."

"Hey, he had the money. Apparently Geoffrey was paying him five thousand for every green room blow job. Do you know how many..." Adam bit his words off.

"Okeydokey. Here's the deal. This ring -- for _you_ \-- cost a lot of five thousand dollar blow jobs. Why would he spend that much money on a ring for _you_ if--"

"What's the going rate for duplicity these days?" Adam shivered, then shook his head. "He lied to me. He lied to me about our beginnings, so..."

Neil nodded. "Well... I'll hold on to it."

"I. Don't. Care." 

Neil shrugged and avoided saying, 'You will care.' Yup, he avoided saying it so he was going to win Son of the Year for once. Or Brother of the Year. For his patience and forbearance, he deserved it. He shoved the ring box in his pocket and sat back down. "Okay, let's talk. You're stuck in a moment, a bad place. Let's get unstuck. There must be a reasonable explanation for all of this. Talk it out."

"I don't want to talk. I want to go home-- god, no, not there. That house has him all over it!" Pausing, he looked over at the bed, then away. "I need to get out of here, get out of there, just disappear. I mean, somewhere where no one can see me and laugh. They're gonna laugh. Like last time." Adam shuddered, then shut his mouth. God, he sounded like he was still twelve years old and tomorrow was gym class. He pressed his lips together and sat as still as he could, focusing on breathing. Just breathe. 

"Adam, we all know that when you stop talking, bad shit goes down. So talk."

"You already know the story. Don't make me repeat it," Adam whispered. He reached up and wiped his eyes. "I... just can't. It was the worst moment of my life. I just can't. I can't. It's hard for me to talk. I feel like I'm in some grey haze. I can't... I can't hear or see or feel because I feel like I'm in a million pieces and if I relive that... I'm going to be like Humpty Dumpty and all the king's horses and all the king's men won't be able to put me back together again." 

 

"I broke us, AdamandKris, KrisandAdam," Kris whispered, looking up at Lane. He supposed he was lucky that Lane hadn't smacked him upside the head because she sure looked like she was itching to. But he needed Lane. She was the problem-solver. Aside from Adam, who clearly wasn't in the mood to be solving this problem. If it could be solved. He felt his emotions veer from despair to hope to despair again. "I broke it all to pieces."

"We did," Geoffrey asserted. "I should have never sent that text message. It was my fault--"

"No. It was mine," Kris argued. "I would've never met him if you didn't find a way to force me and for five years, I've been so glad you did. And and and...You told me to tell him. Like a million times. And I kept putting it off." He slumped forward, covering his face with his hands. 

"I really thought you were going to tell him on the island," Geoffrey noted, putting his hand on Kris' back. "I thought it was a good idea. That way when Adam freaked out, you'd be alone and isolated and could fight it out, work it out because you wouldn't have a choice."

"That was a good plan," Teresa agreed. "Why didn't you?"

"I..uh... was about to. I was freaking out about it that first night and was awake. He woke up and I started to tell him and then he thought I was talking about turning down the deal from RCA and the latest Brian shit and then we got talking about how stressed he was and... I, I just couldn't." 

"Couldn't or wouldn't?" Lane asked. She forced her hands to unclench and smoothed them on her hips and counted to ten. "Well, I could kill you. I really could. I would, too, if..."

"And I will kill you, Geoff. You're _more_ than old enough to know better." Teresa glared at her husband, ignoring his wince. "What Adam did with the two of us was matchmake. What you did was meddle. There is a difference. Kris, as Cale said you need to go back there and talk to Adam," she urged. "Don't let time pass."

Geoffrey nodded. "They're right. That was the mistake Teresa and I made originally. Well, aside from the whole independence issue."

"Aside from that whole independence issue?" Kris squawked. "That's why you kept insisting I accept those gifts!"

"Welllll... true," Geoffrey admitted. "But the death knell was letting time pass and the wounds fester. Go back in there."

"Agreed," Lane said, her tone still sharp. Adam wanted her to help clean this mess up. Well, she was going to make an executive decision and clean it up -- or try to -- her own way. If she failed, then she'd go to the house and pack up Kris' baggage. But first. "Adam is...not being rational right now. He needs you to talk sense to him."

Cale hesitated, then added, "Man, I gotta say they're right. All those times you were the dealing with the shit from your parents, well, it was Adam who was the solid one. It's your turn to be the solid one."

"How can I? He threw me out by the seat of my pants."

"Did he actually --" Geoffrey began.

"No. He didn't touch me, of course not. I meant... But his look... God, if looks could kill, I'd be a dead man." Kris covered his face again and replayed the scene over and over, the fear and hurt in Adam's eyes under the anger. Oh god, he didn't know what to do. 

 

Awkwardly patting his brother on the back and wishing their mother were here, Neil smiled as he decided on a strategy. Logic. Logic would work. Adam liked to solve problems and figure out puzzles. He just had to put aside his hurt and think. "Okay, Lane gave me the gist of it. But here's what I don't understand. If he was taking money, then why did he dress like a ragpicker and live in that dive and why did he drive that piece of crap truck for years? Even after you tried to give him a new one? If he was greedy, then why did you practically have to tie him down to give him anything substantial? Why didn't he take the money you offered to finance his cd? Hell, why didn't he finance his own cd? Why--"

"Whose side are you on?" Adam snarled.

"Like Superman, I am on the side of truth, justice and the American Way."

"Please don't wear tights." Or capes. But he wasn't going to think about Kris' excitement about having a cape for his Venice Carnevale costume. He wasn't, Adam told himself. The gods only knew how he was going to have to train his brain not to poke at the wounds of...everything. Kris was everywhere, in everything. How was he going to --

"Please don't try to change the subject. And please pay attention. Be logical." Neil gently poked Adam in the shoulder. "C'mon. There's a missing piece here." 

"I can't think. The missing piece is my brain. I am so fucking stupid."

"In what way?"

"I... I really thought the universe had finally given me what I want most -- someone to love and to love me back. I should've known..."

"Ad..." Oh no. Not that. Not Adam's insecurities. Neil hovered and shifted from side to side. Where was their mom or Danielle or... damn it, this was Kris' job! "I've never understood these insecurities of yours, why you haven't outgrown them--"

"Oh really? Wasn't it you who was bitching at Thanksgiving about how you didn't get that job you wanted so badly and I got given the talent and you didn't? How you wanted that job in part to prove to Dad that you were a success? Are you telling me those are not the remnants of childhood fears about being in your older brother's shadow?"

"Eh, you're right. That childhood crap is like the monster in the closet. You keep the door closed and you can pretend it's not there. For years. Then the doorknob gets jiggled accidentally, the door pops open and the monster peeks out and you're that kid screaming in your bed, unable to move from fright."

 

"Kris?" Cale snapped his fingers in front of Kris' face. Lane had been right when she'd sent him out to find Kris assuming rightly that Kris would end up outside the room. He was Kris' oldest friend and it fell to him to snap Kris out of this mud puddle. "Dude. Talk. You haven't said a word in over fifteen minutes. You're just staring straight ahead like a zombie. You're freakin' me out."

"I..." Kris bit his knuckle, forcing himself to look at Cale's face and try for a second not think about the pain on Adam's. "I screwed up bad. Real bad. So bad." He belatedly noticed that Cale's jaw was clenching and unclenching. "Aw, shit, you're mad too?"

"Yeah, I'm mad. Partly because I can empathize because I know exactly what Adam's feelin' like right now. Minus the sex and worryin' about you selling dick pics, of course. I know what he feels like because you pulled the same shit on me years ago. Not tellin' me an important truth, then runnin' away, _assuming_ I'd dump you as a friend."

"Well, well... _You_ didn't throw me out!"

"You didn't give me a chance to have a reaction to your face, bud. If you had, I would've been pissed as hell that you kept that secret from me. I would've needed time to get over the mad. Way it worked out, time healed that wound and you didn't have to put up with anger, did you?"

"I... I was hurting too! I was in pain, Cale."

"And the reason you came back to me and your mama was because of Lane and Adam, right? So turnaround time. Listen, time will probably heal this one. But Geoffrey and Teresa are right. Too much time and hearts get hardened. Get back in there."

"Are you deaf? He threw me out!"

"So? It was your choice to go. You didn't have to go." Cale paused when he saw the lightbulb go on over Kris' head.

"Oh fuck. I didn't have to, did I?"

"No. Stand your ground. Get back there and stand your ground. And for goddsakes tell him the whole story! Because I know there's a bigger story here, something... stupid, I bet. But you gotta make him listen!" 

"I--" Kris shook his head. "No. He should've known I'd never crap all over him like that. He should've trusted me."

"And _you_ should've trusted me back then. So _there_." Cale crossed his arms and congratulated himself for not sticking his tongue out the way they used to when they were kids. This was the real deal. Life-changing. Kris needed to get back in that ring and fight for what he wanted.

Teresa observed, "Everyone has trust issues when they're afraid." 

Clicking her tongue against the roof of her mouth, Lane offered, "Adam's afraid, Kris."

"I don't know what y'all want me to do!" Kris complained. "He said his piece. I... couldn't say too much because I did hurt him. I did know better. I was just hoping that if I held my peace, it would all just go away. So I don't know what y'all expect me to do?"

Cale glared at Kris, then softened. Kris didn't know how to have a real fight because his father had ruled the roost with a my way or the highway attitude, no discussions, no arguments. "Listen. Bottom line. Fight smart. You gotta think about how this looks. Leavin' makes you look way guiltier than you are."

"No, I"m guilty--"

Lane snapped, "Of being bloody damn stupid and keeping this secret? Yes, that is true."

"I'll second that," Teresa snapped, glaring at her husband. 

"You're not guilty of not loving him or of takin' advantage of him. You're not," Cale continued, having realized that he was the only one here who could be completely focused on Kris. Lane was angry and hurt at Kris' sins of omission herself, Geoffrey was racked with guilt and Teresa was ready to take Geoffrey's head off. He squared his shoulders. Yup, it was up to him. And maybe Neil too. 

"You're right. I wasn't." Kris shook his head. "I would never!"

Cale nodded. "Well, then. He needs to know that. Right now, that's exactly what he thinks, Kris! And for someone like Adam who's already had people take advantage of him more than once -- he's gonna leap to that conclusion. No doubt about it. You _know_ that -- c'mon! That's why you had the idea to talk to him on that island where you two be forced to fight it out, because you knew it would be a bad fight. So now? Bad timing, bad location, yeah. But. You gotta force him to see the truth because he can't do it on his own."

Kris blinked and stared up at Cale in surprise. "When did you get so wise?"

"What, you think Lane loves me because I have a kickass truck? We're not kids any more." Cale stared back at Kris. "I've been in a relationship myself for a while. I pay attention. I paid attention to your relationship with Adam, for godssakes. And probably most important, my parents had a good marriage. They always said that you had to fuss and fight and get it over with, not stew about it, because after a while that stew gets rancid. They're right. So go fuss and fight. But don't wait -- do it now. It's been over three hours. Time's a'wastin."

"I... I think you're right. I should go--" Kris nodded and then stopped. "What should I say? How do I start?"

"You're the guy who writes the songs!" Cale exclaimed. "Find the words."

"I'll go make sure Adam is still in his room," Geoffrey offered, eager to help. "And see if he'll talk to me while I'm at it. Maybe this will all over with by dinner." He rushed out. 

"I'd suggest you keep it simple. Adam might not give you much time," Lane warned. She crossed her arms over her chest and smiled thinly. "Go ahead, practice on me."

Cale grinned. "You're very Dirty Harry right now, babe. Totally hot."

Lane looked over at him, surprised, then smiled. She shook her head and turned back to Kris. She could kill him, quite dead. "See if you can convince me. In ninety seconds."

"Ninety seconds?"

"Time's flying." Lane tapped her foot. They needed to clean this mess up or she'd be flying back to LA and crying while doing another sort of cleaning. "And I'm Adam and I'm doubtful, so make it good."

"Okay, okay!" Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "Okay, here goes. Geoffrey wanted me to meet Adam and he knew Adam wouldn't agree to a blind date and would hate any kind of set up, so he tried to convince me to, well, bump into him. And I wouldn't because I was a mess, I was this close to being homeless, I was a loser with no real prospects, I didn't even own a real bed, and I couldn't even feed myself, let alone buy Adam a cup of coffee to say nuthin' of taking him on a date. And Geoffrey kept pushing and pushing because you know how he is, dog-with-a-bone and I wanted to meet Adam, because he's Adam Fucking Lambert, oh god so hot, and so Geoffrey and so... Geoffrey finally persuaded me to do it by giving me five thousand dollars so I could buy a decent jacket and have money to buy a coffee and you know, food, 'cause I think he felt sorry for me too, but I wouldn't take the money anyway and... he gave me the money anyway for a jacket and shit, then he didn't want me to be dependent on Adam, so he said to accept the money like I was... his son in need and we had this inside joke about it and ...that's it."

Lane gaped at him, then shook her head. "That was more than ninety seconds."

Kris gaped back. "That's _all_ you're gonna say?"

"I don't even know what to say!" Lane shook her head. "There is a whole story in there-- Wait, did you talk to Geoffrey in his office?" 

"Yeah, why?"

"Because we can use--"

Geoffrey hurried into the room. "He's not answering his door, his cell or the phone in his room."

"Let me try Neil," Lane offered. She bent her head and looked down. "Oh ballocks. He already sent me a text. They left." Lane groaned. "Adam was so distraught, Neil didn't know what to do and Adam just wanted to leave the scene of the crime, so to say, so --"

"He's taking him home to their mother," Kris supplied. "Of course. Wait. They left the room? Where's the ring?"

"Hold on." Lane hurriedly texted and watched Kris hold his breath while waiting for the answer. She nodded and said, "Okay, Neil has the ring. Adam saw it. Neil says he'll give it back to Kris in LA. And yes, he booked a flight back to LA for the two of them so Leila could deal with Adam because he says no one else can handle him right now." 

Cale rolled his eyes. "So it's Adam's turn to race across the country." He shook his head. "You guys are perfect for each other."

"When's the flight?" Geoffrey asked, standing up. "Kris, if we can, we should catch him. Talk to him asap."

Lane looked at her watch. "It leaves in two hours from JFK."

"Ugh, I hate JFK." Geoffrey stood up and looked at Kris. "What are you waiting for? Let's go!"

Standing automatically, Kris stared, then nodded. He had made this mess, he was going to man up and fix it. "Oh hell, yeah. You're right. Let's go." 

 

"Our New Year's edition of E! News starts off with a celebrity New Year's Day altercation at New York's JFK Airport," Giuliana Rancic began. "Ryan, you're in New York yourself. What is going on back east? Who's having a really bad start to the New Year?"

"It appears that the Adam Lambert--Kris Allen family is having yet another horrible, no good, very bad day in an airport, Giuliana." Ryan shook his head as the camera pulled back to show him outside the airport. "Last time, as you'll remember, Adam Lambert was detained at the ironically named Lambert St. Louis Airport. He was held due to a misunderstanding about a scavenger hunt game designed by Kris to guide Adam to an undisclosed location for a romantic getaway. This time, however, the airport fracas is more mysterious. Last night, Adam gave a well-received performance on ABC's Rockin' New Year's Eve with me followed by a New Year's kiss that had Twitter talking. Late today, Kris Allen was briefly detained on at JFK here..." Ryan pointed over his shoulder. "When he apparently tried to get through security without a ticket to get to Adam's gate prior to departure, quite the altercation ensued. We have no idea why Adam and Kris were separated or why Kris was so determined to get to Adam. But we do know that Adam went on his flight and got into LA while Kris was being questioned and detained."

Wincing and ignoring his mother's orders to turn the tv off, Adam flipped channels until he came to Access Hollywood. A new bleached blonde co-host was grinning like a damn fool next to Billy Bush, who was grinning even more widely because he was a damn fool. 

"Thanks to curious onlookers with cell phone cameras, we do have footage of the altercation!" the blonde noted excitedly. "Just as a point of reference, the other people with Kris Allen are Adam's long-time manager, Geoffrey Brush; his oldest friend, Cale Mills, and Adam's personal assistant, Lane Newland. Joining them was Adam's brother, Neil. Allen was, however, the only one detained by airport security. Watch this footage and see if you're seeing what we are. Is it a lover's spat or something more? Is it just the effects of the world's worst hang-over or could it be something more serious? Is the Lambert-Allen family no more? Only time will tell."

 

_Two weeks after New Year's:_

 

"He wuves you. I know dat."

Adam's head snapped up to stare at Emmaline in bright purple pajamas in the doorway of the guest bedroom, where he'd been staying since his mother kicked him out a a week ago, insisting he "face his problems." He'd stood in the doorway of _that_ bedroom and backed away, finding it unbearable. Too many memories. But the memories were everywhere. The only place he could find that was clean of the pain was the guest bedroom. The bed, the closet, the bathroom, the chaise lounge, the music room, the kitchen, the stools, the goddamn wall... So many memories. He quickly turned off the tv, not wanting Emmaline to see the entertainment news coverage of the break-up. Damn, that cell-phone footage of the airport had been painful. Maybe... He needed to think about cleaning up this mess. 

But right now, he needed to hug his daughter. Priorities. He reached out his arms and smiled when she jumped on the bed and then crawled up next to him, launching herself at him for a hug that squeezed the breath out of him. She pulled back and stood up, obviously getting ready to bounce. He held out his hands for to balance on. "What are you talking about? And why are you talking like that?"

"I was in a hurry to get out of bed and fell and hurt my wip." Emmaline pointed to her lip, then began to bounce. Dadakiss wasn't here to tell her not to and Dadam let her get away with it, so she's was going to bounce until Dadakiss came home. "But that's not portent."

" _Im_ port _a_ nt."

Emmaline sighed. Dadum was so picky with words. "That. I saw somethin' on the tv before. About Dadakiss. They were saying he wasn't wivig here any more and maybe you big boys don't wuv each odder any more. But that's ridicuwous! Those pap people don't know nothing! I know better." She stomped her foot on the bed and put her hands on her hips. She'd like to kick those people with their big cameras and big mouths. Someday, she'd find a way and she would kick them. 

"Do you?" Adam smiled at Emmaline's belligerent body language. What a little warrior she was.

"I know he wuves you." 

"How do you know that?" Hissing in a breath as he forced himself to face the fact that Emmaline had spend the morning with Kris at Geoffrey's house because Dani was a _traitor_ , Adam repeated, "How?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

Emmaline sighed. "Mama says you are per per sis tent? But you don't go camping."

"Persistent. It means you keep going until you get what you want. It's an important quality. Although some people, like your mama and mine call it stubborn. Ha." 

"Oh. Stubborn. Like me." Emmaline smiled.

Tapping his daughter's nose, Adam shook his head. "Your mama says you get it from me." 

"Dadakiss be stubborn too sometimes."

"He can."

"He keeps trying to talk to you. I know dat. So he per-sist-tent..." Emmaline said slowly, trying to get the word right. "He called the house today." She waited to see what Dadam would say, but he only pressed his lips together. Well. Maybe he wasn't hearing her and she needed to get closer. She climbed on Dadam's lap. "Hee. If Dadakiss isn't here, then I get the lap!" She giggled. "He wants you. He looks at you like Uncle Brad wooks at anything purple. Like you wook at ice cweam. Like Mama wooks at me. Wuv."

"He does?"

"Yes. Don't be silly. Use your eyes." Emmaline leaned forward and tapped Adam's eyebrow. "And if your eyes don't see, then how about feew?"

"What does that mean?"

Emmaline sighed loudly. Then rolled her eyes. Then crossed her arms over her chest. 

"That was somewhat dramatic, missy."

"Just wike you!" Emmaline laughed. Mama had called Dadam that word -- Dra. Ma. Tic. -- a few times since Dadam had come home from Grammy Leila's house. 

"A snotty mouth---"

"Will get washed out wit soap. Not that Wava stuff!" Emmaline shrieked in protest, then clapped her hands over her mouth. 

"No." Adam smiled, then lost his amusement. "Dadakiss did that, not me." Kris was the more old-fashioned disciplinarian of the two of them. Although he'd only done it once for five seconds and since then only had to show the bar of soap. 

"See, you _know_."

"Know what?"

"That he wuves you." 

"Emmaline..." Adam rubbed his forehead. "I am so tired... And I can't keep up with your superior mind tonight. Can you please tell me what I know that I don't know I know but you know?" 

"Sure, I hewp! It's easy. He wuvs you. You feel it here." Emmaline pressed her hand against his chest. "Just like I feel it here. He wuvs us." 

Adam rested his cheek on Emmaline's messy hair. Oh god, Emmaline. Emmaline loved Kris. Kris had adored Emmaline. Right? That hadn't been a lie, right? Dani insisted it was true. And he... he remembered nights when Kris would walk the floor with a screaming baby and clean up her messes and the way he worried himself sick about her safety and... that wasn't a lie. That love was true. Had to be.

He felt every muscle in his body tighten to the point where he thought a sudden movement might snap him, might snap every bit of him and break him again and then... He let out a breath and collapsed into the soft bed. And if that was true, then.... He looked over at Kris' phone, laying so innocently on the nightstand like it wasn't a harbinger of evil and doom. What was he going to do? Was he just being stubborn? Humph. Well, Kris could try harder to convince him that he'd been wrong. If he was. Humph. 

"He wuvs us." Emmaline kissed Adam's cheek and rubbed his back. "That's why you just called him Dadakiss."

Still eyeing the phone, Adam said absently, "I'm not getting it."

"Poor Dadam." Emmaline cupped his cheek and turned her father's face back to her. She touched the no doubt puffy skin under his eyes. "You tired. Not thinking. I caws him Dada _kiss_ because he's always _kissing_ you." 

"That's true..." Adam said carefully, not knowing how to negotiate the minefields of his heart, his fears, and his daughter's expectations.

"Emmaline! I've been looking for you!" Danielle cried out from the doorway. She hurried in, snatched her up and squeezed her. "It's hours past your bedtime. Give Dadam a kiss, then back to bed with you!"

"Good night, baby girl," Adam said softly after Emmaline had kissed him and the two had left the room. What was he going to do? Dani now thought he was being stubborn and dramatic. She had gone over to Geoffrey's house alone first to hear Kris out and had come home and yelled at him. Well, first she'd tried to talk to him in this _reasonable_ tone, like he was fragile or some such shit, which was ridiculous because he was _angry_ and he had a right to be, damn it! And then when she didn't get her way, she yelled at _him_! He sat up and punched a pillow. So unfair. She'd told him that he needed to listen to Kris so they could move forward. Like it was... a given. A certainty. Like he was just wasting time instead of protecting himself. 

Time. He curled up on the bed and stared out the window into the dark night sky. The idea of the future without Kris seemed so cold and bleak. He still couldn't believe he'd been so wrong about Kris. But he had the proof. Why didn't anyone else seem to see that? Ugh. 

He rolled back over and his eyes caught the glint of the silver case to Kris' phone. Then again, the night wasn't that dark -- after all, this was LA and the radiance from all the lights made the sky more charcoal than black. He was making the night to be darker than it was. And maybe he ought to look at Kris' accounts again, the way Neil and their mom kept telling him to look. Maybe he'd been wrong. But if so -- why hadn't Kris fought back? Why had he left instead of staying and fighting? He reached for the phone and grabbed it with a tight grip.

 

Dani squeezed her daughter. "I went to check on you, but you were gone. I couldn't find you. I was scared."

"Sorry, Mama." Emmaline wiggled in her mother's hold, then patted her cheek. "Is that what's wrong with Dadam? He forgot Dadakiss is at BrushBrush's house, so he can't find Dadakiss, so he's scared?"

Danielle sighed as she carried her daughter back toward their section of the house. "Maybe. What were you doing anyway?"

"Woke up and I heard him." 

Danielle frowned. "I didn't hear him. Not one sound. Emmaline... I hope you didn't wake him up in the middle of the night. Dadam needs to sleep."

"He was awake. I heard him. Here." Emmaline laid her hand on her chest. "He hurts. When I hurt, I want Mama or Dadam or Dadakiss to come and rub my back and kiss my cheek. So I went to rub his back and kiss his cheek."

"That's very nice of you, sweetie." 

"It is! When the people we wuv hurt, we hewp them, right? That's the nice thing to do. We's should be nice." When people were nice back. Emmaline frowned. Those paps people weren't nice.

"That's true." Danielle sighed. She wished she knew what to do to help Adam. She supposed he just needed time. And to agree to hear Kris out. One by one, everyone had gone over to see Kris and had come away with the same judgment. Kris had screwed up, big time, but he loved Adam deeply. She was still angry with him, although Adam wasn't hearing it when she -- or anyone else -- said that, just that she thought he should talk to Kris. But he should. Just one more time. She couldn't imagine the future without the two of them together. And Emmaline... she loved Kris and he loved her. That was as true as the sky was blue. 

"Where is Dadakiss? Why he not here?" 

"Kris... he ... You know he's staying with Uncle Geoffrey right now, remember?"

"He bad boy?" Emmaline asked eagerly, "Is he gonna get his mouth washed out with soap? Was he a bad boy? Was he?"

"I think... He made a mistake. And Dadam is mad at him right now."

"He's not here 'cause he did something bad..." Emmaline paused, then giggled. "Oh. He's in a time out." She giggled some more, she called out in a sing song voice, "Time out, time out, time out. Does he have his naughty stool with him? Time out, time out, time out!"

 

_Three weeks after New Year's_ :

"Adam. You are going to sit down, be quiet and listen to Jacob. He said this was important and needed our immediate attention." Leila pointed from Adam to the chair. Adam had been pacing; it was obvious he was on the cusp of working something out or going nuts. Unfortunately, there was apparently some other crisis, so poor boy would have to delay whatever it was he was trying to do. Tough love time. "You are in my house and..." She glared at him. "What does that mean, young man?"

"That means I follow your rules." Adam sighed. And sat down. "But I have to point out that I hadn't actually said a thing. Not one thing."

"Well, that's worse." Leila explained. 

"Did you ever get the feeling you just can't win?" Adam mused to no one in particular. "Go ahead, Jake."

"It's. Jacob." Jacob winced. 

"Of course, I'm sorry. Jacob." Adam smiled, then sighed. "I'm quite sure you're here to tell me something that will make my life suck even harder. I can't wait. Do tell!"

"Actually, you're right. And I hate to be the bearer of bad news." Jacob turned his palms over. "We need to strategize about how to handle this situation."

"Heh. I always wanted to be in a situation room!" Neil crowed. He subsided when his parents glared at him. "I mean, not at your expense, of course, Adam."

"I'm sure." Adam rolled his eyes and then gave his brother a conciliatory smile. He owed Neil, who'd been a rock for the last three weeks. Over the years, his little brother had somehow turned into a stand up guy, someone you could rely upon. He turned and asked, "Okay, so what is this situation? What is so dire that we all had to convene, together? Is... oh god, is Kris giving some tell-all interview?" He put his hand over his heart. No, he couldn't... Just when he was starting to reconsider--

"No!" Jacob pressed his lips together and counted to ten. "Ignore. Kris. _He's_ not the villain of the day."

"Oh hell." Eber groaned. "Someone else?"

Lane shoved Neil's shoulder. "Neil -- I thought I told you to keep an eye on Adam so he didn't do anything stupid! That's all I asked and you couldn't do that?"

"I did!" Neil protested.

"And I didn't!" Adam protested. "I mean, other than wasting five years of my life and--"

"Not that, not now!" Jacob snapped again, wiping his forehead. God, he was sweating and this nightmare wasn't about him. Poor Adam. He hated to have to tell him. He took a breath and said quickly, "Sorry, Adam, I shouldn't snap at you. I apologize. _Sincerely._ It's no excuse, but I am extremely stressed. We need to focus and our focus for today is that bastardassholelowlife Brian."

" _Brian?_ " They all echoed.

Dani covered her face with her hands. "Oh no, what now? If I could be struck dead for bad choices, I would. Or should. Whatever. It's like the never-ending story of consequences for sex." She blinked. Oh hell, did Adam think that Kris was his Brian? She shook her head. "What has Brian done now?"

Jacob leaned forward and patted Dani's hand. "Hey, we've all slept with the wrong guy once or twice. Here's the deal. Seacrest called me with a heads up --probably because he's hoping for an exclusive later in return for doing this favor. By the way, Adam, you're not answering your phone?"

"Everyone just wants all the juicy details. Including Seacrest. My phone is a bad place full of negative people." Adam crossed his arms over his chest. "You know I prefer not to dwell in the dark murky waters of negativity. I need to surround myself with positive people. And for the record, Dad..." Adam stared back at his father who was giving him that skeptical look. Again. "I did talk to the people I needed to talk to. You all. My lawyers."

"Your lawyers?" Leila asked, her brow furrowed and worried. She looked at Dani. Please, Adam, she begged silently, don't try to cut Kris out of Emmaline's life. She exhaled when Dani shook her head reassuringly. She had been surprised at Adam's easy, if grumbling, acquiescence when she'd initially brought up the topic to the point where she actually thought he was just placating her and intended to do what he wanted regardless. Apparently not. Which was curious. If Adam really thought Kris was a duplicitous gold-digger, wouldn't he have taken steps to keep him away from Emmaline? Hmm. She'd bet that Adam's heart was pulling him one way, his head another, and his pride still another. What a mess. And now it was going to be even messier?"

"I answered my lawyers' phone call. I--" Adam broke off, swore, then continued. "They called to tell me that Brian had contacted them again and to advise that we go to the DA with a request that they view the tapes to press charges for attempted extortion. Naturally, I instructed them to reject Brian's latest blackmail attempt. I didn't tell everyone because... I had more important stuff on my mind. The lawyers will handle it -- that's why they get paid the big bucks. And I'm not going to give into blackmail."

"Which is, of course, the correct strategy. However..." Jacob took a deep breath. "Brian is quite determined to make money off of you. He's like a stalker. And he found a way. A dirty way. He's playing dirty. Very dirty. Scummy, vomitrocious, skanky, rank, rancid..."

"How?" Leila reached for Adam's held and held onto it.

"Apparently, Brian somehow had access to Kris' phone." 

"Oh fuck!" Adam groaned. "Fuckityfuckfuckfuck."

"Couldn't have said it better myself." Looking around, Jacob asked, "Does anyone know how? I'm going to assume here, for the sake of argument, that Kris didn't give it to him." 

"When he lost it at the bar!" Lane suggested. "Remember, last fall?"

"He didn't lose it, did he?" Adam groaned. "Brian was in the bar twice. He stole it, I bet! He stole it, then he brought it back so that Kris would think he lost it -- as usual. Oh damn, Kris, I'm going to kill you. How many times did I tell you to pay attention to that damn phone!" 

Adam heaved out a breath, then sucked one in as he realized he'd forgotten for a few seconds that he was not speaking to Kris. He straightened his spine. He had to remember that he was furious with Kris. He hoped no one else would remember how he'd just spoken as if he was going to be talking to Kris any minute. Or that he hadn't leaped to the conclusion that Kris was in cahoots with Brian because... he probably should've.

Jacob nodded, filing away the fact that Adam had spoken as if he and Kris were still together. He'd suspected that once Adam went through those phone records, it was more a question of when than if. Well, once he got over the pride. Swallowing it could be painful. "My guess is that Brian stole it. And since Kris uses that same obvious password and always has, Brian either knew it at some point some how or was able to figure it out, access all that information and put the pieces together just like Adam did or come to the same conclusions, I should say." 

"The bank accounts? He didn't steal any of the money, did he?" Lane asked. Her hand was nearly twitching with the need to text Cale and Geoffrey about the way Adam had just spoken about Kris.

"No. I'd guess he decided that would be too obvious or he thought he could make more money blackmailing Adam or from a tabloid."

Adam sat down on the floor and bent his head down until it touched his bent knees. "Oh hell. I refused his extortion so he sold the info to a tabloid, didn't he?"

Bending down next to Adam, Leila rubbed her son's back. She wished Kris were here so they were all together on the same team and given the way Adam had just spoken, maybe there was hope of that coming to pass. "Well? What did Ryan say?"

Jacob sighed. "I wish I didn't have to tell you this. But according to Ryan, Brian not only sold the story, he made it incredibly sordid."

"Of course. The dirtier the laundry the deeper the pile of money," Neil noted.

"Absolutely." Jacob nodded. "Thanks to Ryan, I'm here to warn you and plan a strategy to respond. He made Geoffrey sound like a pimp and Kris the worst sort of rent boy. Prostitute." 

"Whore. Yeah. I'm familiar with the concept." Adam's lip curled with self-disgust. "And I suppose I look like a pathetic lovesick fool."

"I'm sorry, but...yes." Jacob winced. He waited while the room exploded with frustrated emotion. Adam looked sick. It was no doubt his own personal anxiety dream come true. 

"Adam, don't let this liar get your back up," Leila warned softly, feeling the tight muscles in that back under her fingers. 

"We're going to take many steps back now," Neil whispered to Dani. He was still angry with Kris himself to the point where he hadn't spoken to him yet, although everyone else had, but the point wasn't his desire to pop Kris one in the nose, but what Adam would want... eventually. This development was going to delay everything.

"I know." Dani shook her head. "It's my fault..." She whispered, surprised when Neil put his arm around her for a hug. 

"How do we know Kris wasn't in on it?" Adam asked, his mind reeling as he remember the humiliation from...before Kris. Before, the guy who'd used him to get ahead in the music biz, the guy who'd sold those pictures. Damn it, why did history keep repeating itself? Was he in some really long-drawn out version of Groundhog Day? Finally paying attention to other people in the room, he noted with dismay that Neil and Dani were whispering to each other. And oh hell to the no, Neil was hugging Dani? Oh no. "How do we know?"

"Yeah, because all those ancient plaid shirts and dirty sneakers of his were soooo expensive," Neil drawled. 

Everyone snapped their attention to Neil. He took a breath, hoping this was a good opportunity to press Adam into thinking about what he'd seen on that phone, really think about it. Because, damn, Adam needed to be pressed on this illogic. He had caught that comment about killing Kris, as if Adam was going to talk to Kris any minute, just like normal. There was a chink in Adam's armor. Finally. Time to move in. "Well? He didn't have expensive tastes. He was okay in that scary apartment of his -- that looked like the perfect scene for a slasher movie -- once it got painted and he got a futon. His favorite possession was the world's ugliest chair. He was okay in that bucket of bolts he called a truck. Remember the argument you had trying to get him to accept your old car as a gift? And did I mention that chair?" 

"It was an act," Adam insisted, feeling like his mind was doing the Hokey-Pokey dance. One foot in, one foot out, one hand in, one hand out, turn around and what was it all about? "I mean, look at how he moved on up from that scary apartment to our house."

"Adam, we were going to buy a house for a family anyway," Danielle reminded him, deciding that she and Neil should tag team. She had a feeling Adam might be being stubborn for the sake of pride. "Kris seemed more interested in the pool than anything else."

"He seduced me into buying that house. All that talk of sex in the pool's grottoes!" Adam argued. He covered his mouth with his hand as he felt a smile begin to curl his lips, wondering from whom he was hiding the smile -- his family or himself. Was he... forgiving Kris already? And like starting a fight with him when he wasn't even here? Oh hell, no... right?

"Son, you need to be calm," Eber said sternly. He'd seen the muscles of Adam's face move in a smile before Adam covered it up. Was the boy getting hysterical or... Oh. Waitaminit. Was he actually smiling about something to do with Kris? Well, opportunity might be knocking. 'Good job, Neil', Eber thought silently and added, "I mean it. You're not focusing on what's important. We need to have a family meeting about what you showed me on Kris' now-infamous phone." 

"You can do that later. Right now, we need a statement," Jacob warned. When Adam shook his head, Jacob gritted his teeth. "Listen. To. Me. This is why you pay me the big bucks. And Geoffrey--"

"Him!" Adam scoffed. "As soon as my lawyers can finish drawing up the papers, he's fired as my manager."

"Well, for right now, he's still your manager," Jacob pointed out. Truth was, if Adam really wanted to fire Geoffrey, he would have had those papers drawn up weeks ago. What the hell was going on in Adam's head, anyway? Then again, maybe Adam didn't even know. He was probably just trying to stay afloat in the sea of shit into which he'd been thrown. "He agrees with me. Make. A. Statement. Or better yet, give an interview with someone sympathetic. Too bad Oprah's retired, but then again, she does do interviews occasionally. And of course, Leno would do it. Or Seacrest. Or Piers Morgan. Or Rolling Stone. Or People. Or--"

Adam gaped at Jacob. "You have lost your damn mind if you think I'm going on national tv or in a national magazine boo-hooing my way through an interview about what a fucking idiot I was that I got conned for five years! You're my pr guy. My pr is going to be 'No comment!'"

 

_Later that same day:_

"I do NOT get paid enough for this!" Jacob muttered as he rang the doorbell to Geoffrey's house. "Being an assassin would be more lucrative. And enjoyable."

"Well, I'd pay you to kill Brian," Lane offered. "Name your price. Maybe Geoffrey can give _you_ the money."

"Oh, honey, I'd kill Brian for free." 

"Jake!" Kris flung open the door, with Geoffrey standing behind him.

"My. Name. Is. Not. Jake. And. I. Am. Tired. Of. Having. To. Put. A. Period. On. The. End. Of. Every. Word. With. You. Guys."

Lane burst out laughing. "I know the feeling." She looked at Kris and Geoffrey. "May we come in or would you like us to air your dirty laundry on the front steps?"

"I vote for coming in." Geoffrey waved them in. "So, how did it go?"

"We just came from Leila's. Again." Lane smiled. "I feel like we're emissaries from a foreign land trying to broker a peace treaty. Speaking of bizarre foods and sacrificial customs, what does the string and tin can system from Gopher Flats have to say about the media speculation about you and Adam?"

"You mean my mother? Or the church biddies?" Kris shrugged as Geoffrey led the way into the living room, then he and Jacob left the room. "Or Facebook?"

"What does your mother say about this?" Lane asked, putting her hand on Kris' shoulder and sitting next to him on the sofa.

"My mother's mad at me. If I were within hittin' distance, my ear would be hurtin'. Or my butt. She told me I'm not too old for a switch to my ass. You..." Kris touched Lane's hand. "You care about what my mother thinks?"

"Of course." Lane looked down into Kris' eyes and saw the hesitation there and came to a sudden realization. Cale was right. Kris did not know how to fight. He might get all hedgehoggy as Adam said, but real fighting? He was a rank amateur. She took his hand. "Listen. I think we were like Ross and Rachel -- that break business. I thought we were on a break and you thought it was over? Wrong. I just needed time. I still love you. I was very angry with you. Mad angry. You can feel both at the same time."

Kris said with a tentative smile, "I... I've been afraid you hated me, Laney."

"If I did, I wouldn't have been coming here with Jacob helping to smooth out this situation. I probably seemed a little... cold, but I had to process everything," Lane explained. 

Kris nodded. "And when you were done processing..." 

"You know, it's possible to be furious with someone and still love them. Not everyone is your father or the likes of the so-called good Christians of your church in Gopher Flats who withdraw their love when you do something bad. It's not hopeless, not necessarily." Please, Lane begged silently, let Adam's family get through to him so she wasn't misleading Kris. "You can't just assume that the love has been withdrawn and there's no, let's say, appeals process. Like with your father." 

"Is that what..." Kris gaped. "Is that why I didn't fight back with Adam?"

"That's my bet. Plus Adam's rather... assertive when he's angry. I always said he's not someone you want to get angry with you. I can see why you stepped back, but you needed to _fight_ back." Lane paused, searching her mind for some story to tell to... "Oh, I have it! Remember that first date you took with Adam?"

"Kinda." Kris rolled his eyes.

Lane growled. "Apparently you don't. Because you've forgotten something about it -- something YOU told me about, not him. Remember?"

_  
Adam had said, "Okay, here’s the deal. I can be a control freak. But I'm definitely not looking for some guy who's submissive to my every petty little desire..."_

_Adam was bossy, no doubt, but it was clear that partly he was bossing Kris around right now because he thought Kris couldn’t afford to pay for the extras and wanted to save Kris’ pride. It wasn’t the my way or the highway bossiness of his parents and..._

__

"And doesn't Adam love it when you get all..." Lane wrinkled her nose. "Hedgehoggy? Prickly?"

"I...yes. You're right. And Adam gets more and more control freaky the more he feels threatened. And when he gets threatened, he goes on the offensive." Kris hit his forehead with the base of his hand. "He was reverting to the way he used to be before he met me. And I was reverting to the way I was with my parents." Kris bit his lip as he recalled one of Adam's first questions about his family, which though soft-spoken had cut right to it.

_"Did everyone really reject you or did you just pull back under the assumption--"_

_"I know they all rejected me!" Kris exclaimed, then bit his lip._

"So. Maybe I should fight back." Kris nodded. "Well, start out with an apology or eleventy billion apologies, then fight back?"

"Yes and honestly..." Lane froze, then made a decision. "I know this to be true. He wanted you to fight back."

"Oh shit."

"So if you want to hold on to him..."

"Of course, I did! _Do_."

"So I think you made a tactical error in retreating and you need to establish a new line of offense. "

"I don't want to battle him!" Kris exclaimed.

"Then you may lose everything," Lane warned, leaning forward, intent on trying to get through to Kris. "It's not battling _against_ him, it's fighting _for_ your relationship. You know that phrase, all's fair in love and war? It's because they often do resemble each other. You need to fight for your relationship now. I... think Adam may need you to do that to show that you want him enough to fight for him. If you don't know how, you need to learn how. Now."

"I told you that same thing on New Year's day and I'm still right," Cale said from the doorway. "I got your text, Laney and came over right straight after work. To help with whatever you need help with." 

"Come over here and explain again to your friend that you can fight and still love each other, that a couple can fight and work it out. We do, don't we?" Lane asked, standing up to give Cale a quick hello kiss.

Smiling as he pulled back, Cale looked down at Kris. Who finally looked like he was considering the idea that Cale had been trying to explain for weeks now. "Hell, yeah. We come from totally different backgrounds, so we have misunderstandings and disagreements. Not so much now, but in the beginning? Whoa. And in the beginning I sometimes had trouble with understanding her slang or her humor or point of view. Because it was different and I leaped to conclusions. And she had ideas about me based upon her visit with Pearline, although she likes _my_ snake, if you know what I mean... Hey!" Cale laughed when Lane swatted at him. "Seriously, dude. We have had fights. Doozies." 

"And then Cale realizes he was wrong, I was right and all is well." Lane paused and counted to three, then added, "And Cale, stop shaking your head and mouthing, 'She only _thinks_ she's right' behind my back."

"I hate that!" Cale griped with a laugh. He reached out and hugged Lane. "She's telling the truth though. You can have a serious fight and still come back from that. You and Adam never really had a serious fight. And hand to God, this is mebbe the most serious fight you could have. With Adam. Or Lane. You haven't had enough practice in fighting."

"But..." Kris sucked in a breath. "Okay, so I need to learn how to fight smart. But explain to me -- You're telling me this, Laney? So...you're ready to forgive me now? Why? What did I do _right_ with you?"

"For me, it wasn't what you did right with me. I mean, you did apologize, but you know what? Words _are_ cheap. So what's more important is how you behaved. It's what I observed. I saw how genuinely you hurt and wished you could make it up to him. I..." Lane paused and thought. "I suppose I knew intellectually that you weren't making designs to use or hurt Adam, which is why I didn't kick your ass New Year's Day, but... I needed to see it."

"Speaking of needing to see it, here's your phone, by the way." Jacob handed it over to Kris as he and Geoffrey came into the room. "Eber gave it to me, after Adam gave it to him. Adam examined it and he admits that there's no smoking gun of a dick pic on here."

"He does?" Kris gaped, then grinned. "That's... huge, right?" 

"I said there was no pic of his dick on the phone." Jacob smirked.

"How do you..." Kris blinked. "Oh... You're gay and there is the glambulge."

"Which no one's seen for years due to your five thousand dollar a pop blowjobs."

"You--" Kris jumped to his feet, took a step forward, his fist raised. He stopped mid-motion. "Oh. Wait. You're prepping me for the paps, aren't you?"

"You are not only cute, you're smart. Well, sometimes. Except for the little matter of not telling us your bloody secret," Lane added. 

Kris' hand was still in mid-air, holding the phone. "Is he... is he willing to listen to me? Does he realize I didn't spend the money on myself?"

"Not yet," Lane said softly. "Or he's not willing to admit it yet. And while I think that knowledge will help, it's not enough. He's still deeply hurt about the lying, Kris. He feels used and abused. He's stuck in a moment. Like that song they used one year for the kiss-off on Idol. Remember?"

"I know I did wrong, but if he would just give me a chance to talk! What do I have to do, ambush him?"

"I wouldn't advise that a'tall," Geoffrey told him, having been briefed by Jacob earlier that day. "He's about to feel like he just stepped on a landmine. Let me explain. It's going to get even messier."

 

 

_Four weeks after New Year's Day:_

"As if it weren't _shocking_ enough that the inseparable duo of Adam Lambert and Kris Allen seems to have broken up, now comes news from a former associate of Lambert's, who alleges that Allen was nothing more than a prostitute hired by Lambert's record label to play his boyfriend!" Billy Bush shook his head as he continued. "The _truly_ shocking part? That Lambert -- so this former associate _alleges_ \-- was in the dark about _all_ of this and thought Allen was just a cute young man he'd chanced to meet at Starbucks and that they'd subsequently fallen in love."

"Ouch!" The blonde co-host winced. "Double ouch. Lambert's label, management, and his pr rep have all declined comment. I have to say I'm shocked at this news. They seemed like a wonderful couple."

"Well, as we know from living and working in Hollywood, appearances _can_ be deceiving!" Billy smiled. "And of course, this information is only _allegations_. Nonetheless, we have not been able to obtain a statement from Lambert or Allen, both of whom seemed to have dropped off the radar. Speculation is that both men are somewhere hiding from the press." 

"I don't blame them! I would be in seclusion myself!" The blonde shuddered in seeming commiseration.

 

"Oh, she's lovin' this!" Kris exclaimed, setting his bottle of beer down with a clank on the bar. "So's he. Asshole. They're practically salivating. Did you see that gleam in his eye?"

"No shit." Cale nodded. "This reminds me of that Don Henley song..." 

"Me too." Kris began to sing and Cale joined in. 

_We got the bubble-headed-bleach-blonde who comes on at five  
She can tell you 'bout the plane crash with a gleam in her eye   
It's interesting when people die-   
Give us dirty laundry _

_Can we film the operation?  
Is the head dead yet?   
You know, the boys in the newsroom got a running bet   
Get the widow on the set!   
We need dirty laundry _

_You don't really need to find out what's going on  
You don't really want to know just how far it's gone   
Just leave well enough alone   
Eat your dirty laundry _

_Kick 'em when they're up  
Kick 'em when they're down   
Kick 'em when they're up   
Kick 'em when they're down _

_Kick 'em when they're up  
Kick 'em when they're down   
Kick 'em when they're stiff   
Kick 'em all around _

_Dirty little secrets  
Dirty little lies   
We got our dirty little fingers in everybody's pie   
We love to cut you down to size   
We love dirty laundry _

_We can do "The Innuendo"  
We can dance and sing   
When it's said and done we haven't told you a thing   
We all know that Crap is King   
Give us dirty laundry! _

Finishing the song, Kris bent forward and rested his face on the bar and moaned. "Damn it. I gave them so much dirty laundry. How the hell am I ever gonna clean it up?"

"Well, I'd start by getting off my ass and go hunting down your boyfriend and make him listen. Make him," Cale repeated.

"How'm I gonna do that? Sit on him?" Kris shook his head. "Besides, I don't think he'd listen even then. He won't talk to Geoffrey either. Says he's gonna fire him as his manager."

Cale peeled the label off his bottle of Bud. "You know, he didn't return the ring. He kept it."

"I bet he ground it under his heel. Wearing those damn python boots." 

"Nah. That was a great ring. He'd respect the craftsmanship on it." Cale took a long gulp of his beer. Trying to help fix a relationship was drinking work. 

John shoved another beer at Cale, then Kris. "Have you tried calling him again?" 

"Yes! But he's blocked my number on his phone," Kris admitted. "And when I did get through to him on the house phone, he hung up on me before I could even apologize. I haven't been aggressive enough. I... just left that hotel room in a daze and... I guess I've been in a daze since." 

"Shock." John nodded. "Grief. You need to get out of the stage of shock and disbelief." 

"So call him again. Or write a letter. Or take out a damn billboard!" Cale suggested. "Just do something. You want the guy. Go get 'im. Move your ass."

 

_Same day:_

"Bro, you gotta chill." Neil stared at his brother. "And listen."

"No, I already know what I need to know! My life sucks!" Adam glared at Neil, then resumed stomping around the room. Why was everyone telling him he needed to listen, or in Geoffrey's case, that he needed to watch some videos of something? Watch them plan his life for him? Ha! 

"Seriously!" Neil yelled. "Listen to us. Calm down." He gestured to his mother, father and Danielle, all sitting in his mother's living room, before looking at his brother. Adam had once again moved in with his mother and Neil had to admit that was prudent because the paps were camped out around the entrance to the gated community in which their home was located. And once again he was pacing the room like a caged lion, a newly caged lion recently brought into captivity and wanting to rip the zookeeper's heads off. "Don't make me sit on you." 

"I'd like to see you try!"

"Neil..." Leila put her hand on Neil's arm. "Adam's spoiling for a fight. I can't blame him. I want to punch Brian in the face. And then knee him in the groin. Or possibly kick him in the groin with a pair of very pointy shoes with steel tips on the end..."

"You're so bloodthirsty, Mom!" Adam began to laugh, some of his tension releasing itself.

"So yes, I can understand the urge to resort to physical violence." Leila patted Neil's arm. "But please. Don't give it to your brother." 

"But I want to..." Neil whined for the fun of it. "And Adam likes fighting with me."

"Actually, that's true," Adam admitted. "Neil gives as good as he gets."

"You know, not everyone fights like me," Neil said abruptly. 

"Okaaay." Adam arched an eyebrow. 

"My point--"

"Oh, you have one?"

"Shut up." 

Adam's mouth quirked. "Did you mean that in a nice way?"

"No. Only Kris means that in a nice way!" Neil snapped, then when Adam's face tightened, Neil pointed at him. "I meant you need to shut up and let me tell you my brilliant insight."

"I should probably sit down. The world has been tilting on its axis enough lately. I don't think I can handle the world premiere of brilliance from you." 

"And that's my point. The way we argue with each other. I know you and Kris had your little snip snap arguments, but you and I fight with each other. Hard. But about five years ago I pushed you too far and you fired me, but did you ever think I didn't love you?"

"Well, no." 

"And even when I was mad as fuck at you for firing me, I didn't ever think you didn't love me."

"And so....?" Adam made the hurry-up rolling motion with his hands. 

"And so. That's how we fight. Doesn't mean it's the only way to fight. Doesn't mean that if someone needs to regroup and think before they fight back that they don't love you. Think about it." 

"What the hell..." Adam stared at Neil, then turned to his mother. Who was smiling at Neil. "Humph. I'm supposed to be the favorite son."

"Get real. The baby's always the favorite," Neil taunted. He grunted when Adam shoved his shoulder. 

Dani raised her eyebrows, then smiled and touched Neil's hand. "Hey, when did you grow up?" 

"I've been grown up for a while." Neil smiled at Dani. Could she finally be seeing him as an adult? Well, then, this mess of Adam's might prove of some value. "You just persisted in seeing me as the little brother who tried to follow you and Adam around and annoy the crap out of you." 

"Hmm." Dani smiled up at Neil. Hearing a choked sound, she smiled reassuringly at Adam, who looked positively alarmed that she and Neil were talking. She didn't know what that was about, but then again Adam wasn't acting normal these days. 

Oh for the love of good psychotropic medicine, Adam thought in disgust watching his brother make googlymoogly eyes at Dani who was actually, oh gag, looking at Neil with something like admiration... what was wrong with people lately? Was he the only sane one? 

_Ding-dong_

"Oh, good, that's Jacob!" Adam sprinted to the door and after looking through the peephole, opened it. "He'll fight with me."

"Not being an idiot, I most certainly will not!" Jacob retorted, motioning for Lane to precede him into the condo. He wasn't stupid. Lane could go first. "Get yourself a punching bag and work out your issues on it. Not me. I'm here to help, along with everyone else."

"Is this some sort of intervention?" Adam froze.

"No." Eber put his hand on his son's back. "It's the people who love you trying to help you through a crisis."

"Come in, Jacob. Lane." Leila elbowed her oldest son in the side and held out a hand. "Come in. Would you like a drink, something to eat?"

"Something strongly alcoholic would be awesome." Jacob smiled gratefully at Leila and ignored Adam's looming presence at his back. "Because I'm about to suggest something radical and logical."

"I'm all for that!" Neil exclaimed. "Finally, logic!"

Jacob smiled at Neil as he sat down and then looked up at Adam. "I'll cut to the chase. From a pr point of view, the best strategy is for you to sit down with Kris and work out a plan for handling this mess. Together."

"You have lost your damn mind," Adam snapped, crossing his arms. 

"No, I haven't." Jacob wondered when he'd turned into a mediator. This should be Lane's job. "Lane? How about you step in here?"

"You know, I would, but you're doing such an absolutely brilliant job, I see no need." Lane sat down, crossed her legs and began to swing her foot. "Go on, keep talking. Explain to Adam why he should talk to Kris. Not that he doesn't already _know_ that talking to him might solve a whole host of problems or anything. Because he's smart like that." She blinked innocently as Neil snorted and Adam glared at her. She shrugged and turned back to Jacob. "So I'm sure convincing Adam to talk to Kris will be quite easy for a man of your skills. Assuming those skills you're always touting actually exist outside of your own mind."

Jacob sighed. "I really don't get paid enough for this."

"I'm sure Kris can give you a bonus. He's got a hundred thousand dollars in his bank account," Adam sniped. 

"Let me tell you this, Lambert. If he did get paid to be your boyfriend, he earned every penny!" Jacob retorted.

"Since when are you on Team Kris?" Neil asked, when Adam just opened and closed his mouth like a fish. Too bad they weren't taping this conversation because he'd so be making a gif of that face. "You always poked at him."

"Eh, Kris grew on me. Like a fungus. A little, plaid fungus." Jacob grinned. "C'mon, let's be honest."

"That would be a refreshing change!" Adam sniped, then turned away to stare at the wall. He took one measured breath after another. Finally, that childbirth class was coming in handy.

"Okaaay." Jacob rolled his eyes. "It didn't take 20/20 vision to see that Kris was a perfect match for Adam or that he loved him. And a happy Adam made happy songs which was a persona and a product that was easier for me to promote."

Lane rolled her eyes. "Oh stuff it, Jacob. After all these years, we know the truth. You're not the cold-hearted bastard you like to portray yourself to be. You like Adam and want him to be happy."

Adam spun around. "Why are you talking about me like I'm not here?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because you were acting like you were tuned out of the conversation? You've been hiding for nearly a month now. It's time to tune back in," Leila explained. "I sent you home three weeks ago and you have not moved forward. Unfortunately, your private matter has become a source of public gossip, so we _have_ to find a way to do that. That's why Jacob is also here."

Jacob nodded. "But here's the deal. I'm not talking just as Jacob your pr rep. I'm talking as Jacob, a guy you've known for years. We may not be besties, but we are friends by this point, are we not? You know I have your best interests at heart, do you not?"

"Yesss..." Adam said cautiously. He could tell where this was going. Jacob was going to be yet another person telling him to give Kris another chance. Feeling his pulse pound, he took a deep breath while he vowed to get control and then to his own surprise, exploded. "No, don't even go there! No way! He humiliated me! Not just privately, but _publicly_!" Adam gestured towards the television. "The entire world thinks I'm a stupid fat sap who can't get my own dates -- and maybe I am, but did everyone have to know it? Know my worst moment? I'm hiding out at my mom's, for godssakes! And Kris is the one to blame--"

Dani flushed and pointed out, " _Brian_ was the one--"

"But the only reason there was ammunition for Brian to find and load in his gun was because Kris made the damn bullets!" Adam snapped, breathing heavily.

"That true, but I think you owe it to Kris to listen to him," Leila suggested calmly. "We've all gone over to Geoffrey's to talk to him and hear his story. We were all angry on your behalf. We are. Don't think we're taking Kris' side. But I do think in the interests of fairness, that you need to hear him out."

"I agree, But then, remember -- I'm on the side of truth, justice and the American Way!" Neil interjected.

"Yeah, you're a real Superman." Adam rolled his eyes.

"Ad, we talked about this before," Eber continued. "We know and respect the fact that you were deeply hurt. But you if you're not going to talk to Kris, you at least need to look at the facts. I know you looked at the info on his phone. So. What did Kris' accounts show you? What were his withdrawals?" The room fell silent, waiting for Adam's answer.

Well, hell. Adam closed his eyes and saw the accounts in his mind. If the deposits were true, so were the withdrawals. "They were mostly around my birthdays or to pay for that vacation."

"Where _did_ you think he was getting the money to pay for stuff?" Dani asked.

"Did you think about it?" Adam retorted.

"No, I didn't," Dani admitted. "But did you?"

"The big party? I told him to see the accountant, I think, and he said he had it covered. I figured he took it out of the household account or..." Adam took a deep breath. "I figured Geoffrey had given or loaned him the money and I didn't want to make a big deal of it because I thought it would hurt his pride." Pausing, Adam sang the line, "Isn't it ironic?"

Leila sighed. "So you thought Geoffrey had given him the money?" 

"Truth is, I didn't think much about it. I admit I let the accountant handle those details, so my bad. If I did it myself, I would have realized earlier. He wasn't really hiding it, if I'd paid attention. And..." Adam took a breath and continued, "He used money for the gift everyone gave me to help pay off Brian the first time." He paused, looking at his hands. At least they weren't trembling, which surprised him because he felt damn shaky right now. But his hands... "And... the ring."

"So, he wasn't using the monies for himself, right?" Eber continued, still speaking softly. 

Adam shook his head. "No, he wasn't. But... I'm not trying to be obstreperous, although I feel like a big galumphing elephant lately, it's not the money. Not really. Can you all understand that? Will you? I feel like you're all pushing me, when I was the one who was deceived." 

"Oh sweetheart." Leila rubbed his arm. "I'm sorry. We're all in crisis mode and maybe we're all pushing because we're all trying to clean up this mess too fast..."

Dani asked, "Getting back to your point. It comes down to the lie, doesn't it?"

"Yes," Adam admitted. "It's the lie. That went on and on and on. God, I don't..." He bit his lip and ducked his head as his mother got up and wrapped her arms around him. He whispered, "Mom, I don't know. I feel pulled apart inside."

"I know, darling. We're trying to help you work through this. So bear with me, okay? Am I right that if he'd told you at the beginning or even told you himself of his own volition, you would have been mad, but you would have gotten past it?" Leila asked. 

"I don't know, maybe!" Adam burst out, pulling back to pace, then came to stand in front of the doors to the patio. He watched the fronds of the palm trees sway in the Santa Ana winds. Crap, it would be dusty out there. And hot. If he were home, they'd all be outside in the pool, he and Neil throwing Emmaline around while Kris winced and hid his eyes in a book to keep from watching and... "I can't think. I just..."

"Why do you think Kris didn't tell you?" Lane asked, holding her breath. They were so close.

"Because he didn't trust me, because he was afraid." Adam looked back as he heard a sound. "What was that?"

"The sound of us all exhaling," Leila responded with a smile. "Son, if you understand that--"

"What I understand is that his fear was more important than what I needed, "Adam snapped. "And if he told me the truth, then none of that proof that Brian twisted would have been on his phone for that lowlife to find and I wouldn't be hiding at Mom's!"

Eber nodded. "And aren't you doing the same thing right now? Aren't you letting your fear of getting hurt or your need to maintain your pride keep you from doing what you both need -- talking it out? So at least you can handle this mess together? Just see Kris. Talk to him."

Looking at his father incredulously, Adam shook his head and walked to the patio doors and just as he stepped outside, exclaimed, "I can't, guys, I can't... The public humiliation is... I need for this not to have happened or for... I don't know what."

 

 

"I know what!" Driving away, Jacob smiled. He had an idea what. And it would kill solve two problems simultaneously. Damn, he was good.

"Damn, you're good," Lane exclaimed as they finished working on the plan more than twelve hours later. It was six in the morning, but a night well spent. "Damn. Bloody hell! It will -- or hopefully shall -- solve both problems. Cleaning up their reputations and hopefully, helping them get back together. Why didn't I think of it?"

"Because you, my lovely Brit, are not a pr genius." Jacob made a show of rubbing his knuckles against his suit jacket lapels. "This is why I am worth the big bucks."

"If this works, I'll give you a bonus," Geoffrey said quietly. 

"All you have to do is give me the videos." Jacob paused. "Wait, I'll take the bonus too."

Coming back into the room, Kris winced and yawned. "Yeah, I won't." 

"Okay, so let's see what you've got," Geoffrey urged. 

Hannah stopped at the doorway in surprise at seeing everyone this early, shrugged, poured herself a cup of coffee and then came down to sit next to them at the conference table. 

Jacob grinned as he set up the projector. "Finally! I get to use my skills to their best advantage. I have --" 

"A plan. Not just an idea, but a plan, I take it?" Hannah asked.

"You bet your ass I have a plan." Jacob flipped open his laptop. 

"Are you seriously going to use a PowerPoint?" Kris asked incredulously, then shut his mouth. Apparently Lane was right and this was a battle plan. He leaned forward and listened as Jacob explained.

"And if that doesn't work, we'll go with this." Jacob pressed the button to move to the next screen. "What do you think, Kris?"

"I think...I like some of it. But hear this." Kris looked at Geoffrey. "I'll pay for it. In fact, I'll do it all myself, thank you." 

"But--" Jacob began.

"No. I relied too much on others before, even if you all meant well." Kris shook his head tiredly. "I gotta do this on my own. I appreciate everything you've done for me tonight, the last few weeks. But I'll take some of what you planned and mix it up... For example, that?" Kris smiled and pointed at the last screen. "Needs more glitter."


	58. Needs more glitter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks

**Chapter 58: Needs More Glitter. And More Memories.  
Rating: NC-17**

"No. I relied too much on others before, even if you all meant well." Kris shook his head tiredly. "I gotta do this on my own. I appreciate everything you've done for me tonight, the last few weeks. But I'll take some of what you planned and mix it up... For example, that?" Kris smiled and pointed at the last screen. "Needs more glitter."

"Glitter's always such a bitch to clean up, though," Lane noted with a yawn.

"It's easier than dirty laundry!" Kris protested, as he signed the legal papers Hannah had given to him last night.

 

 _The next day_ :

"As you may remember," Billy Bush began. "We reported that a former associate of Adam Lambert and Kris Allen had sold a story _alleging_ Allen was a male _prostitute_ , commonly known as a rent _boy_ , paid for by Lambert's manager, Hollywood powerhouse Geoffrey Brush. Less than forty-eight hours later, lawyers for Lambert, Allen and Brush have filed suit in California state court seeking compensatory damages in the amount of _five million dollars_ each for defamation of character. Given that this is the same legal team which successfully sued a former lover of Lambert's and a tabloid for releasing naked -- and _unflattering_ \-- photos of the singer and won one million dollars, we can safely assume that Lambert won't have to wait _too_ long to buy his next tube of _guyliner_. What else happened on the Lambert-Allen front today?"

The blonde co-host smiled and continued, "In addition to the civil suit filing, the Los Angeles District Attorney's office has been presented with evidence and is considering filing extortion charges against that former associate. A spokesperson for Lambert and Allen declined comment today outside the courthouse except to say that Lambert is cooperating with investigators and is determined to see the matter come to justice in both civil and criminal courts no matter how long it takes." She paused and shivered. "I've always thought Adam Lambert is a sweet guy, but not the sort of man one wants angry at you. If I were that former associate, I'd be backtracking and issuing public apologies right now." 

"Now, now..." Billy Bush shook his head. "That's for the courts to decide. Now, as for the court of _public_ opinion? Well, Adam's fans -- usually called _Glamberts_ \-- have rallied to his defense. No doubt, however that they, like the rest of us are eager to see Adam in public once again. Will Kris Allen be on his arm at the next red carpet event? Who can tell?" 

 

 _Two days later_ :

"Who was that?" Adam turned around as his mother returned from answering the door.

"A delivery. For you." Leila shrugged. "I don't get it. But maybe you will."

"For me?" Adam jumped up from his chair, spun around and stared at the cellophane-wrapped bowl in his mother's hands. "What the hell?"

"My sentiments exactly." Lifting the bowl up higher as she shrugged, Leila asked, "So why would someone send you--"

"Me? Here?" Adam asked sharply. "So either someone discovered your address or it's someone who knows us well enough--"

"Criminey. This is not a CIA mission. Just take the card!" Lane exclaimed impatiently, plucking it free from the card attached to the bowl.

"Wait. It's nuts with a banana on top? I know who it's from." Adam's mouth quirked and he began to laugh. "Get it? Bananas and _nuts_?"

"Oh. Dirty fruit. Well, here then, it's definitely for you." Leila shoved it at Adam. "But who is it from?"

Without looking at the card, Adam responded, cradling the bowl in the crook of his elbow and laughing again, "Kris. It's Kris. Read the note, Lane."

"You're sure?" Lane asked and when Adam nodded, she opened it. " _Adam. Hope you like my banana. Kris_ " 

"Okeydokey." Leila arched her eyebrow as Adam laughed once again and looked at Lane, who appeared just as simultaneously mystified and gratified at Adam's amusement as she was. "Perhaps you'd like to be alone with Kris'... banana and nuts?"

Pulling the cellophane loose and poking around the bowl, Adam pulled out a chrome-plated tool. "Hey, look. He sent along a nut cracker. I'd like to... That..." He laughed again. "The basket...This is because when we first went out, I sent him a huge fruit basket in the shape of--"

"I can just imagine," Leila said drily. Apparently when Kris decided he was going to reach Adam, he knew exactly how to do so. And making Adam laugh was a good first step. You could not be furious with someone who made you laugh out of what appeared to be an inside joke. "Go put your gift away now. Unless you'd like to crack some nuts or oh I don't know, call Kris?"

"Perhaps yes to the former and no to the latter." Adam shook his head as he set the bowl down on the floor of the balcony and sat back down in the chair he'd vacated. He uncapped a beer for his mother and handed it to her. He'd have to hand it to Kris -- that had been funny. Had gotten him to laugh when he hadn't really laughed in weeks. Little shit. He was supposed to still be furious. 

Lane nodded to herself. Here goes. He was ready. Or she hoped he was. Who knew what really lay in someone's heart? "Adam, you really should make some sort of public or semi-public appearance." 

"You need to be seen out in public. For your own good," Leila urged, her voice soft as she sat next to Adam and Lane on her balcony, overlooking the condo's pool. "Or at least get out of my condo. Go to the the grocery store or something."

"I am in public. I'm on a balcony. Anyone can see me. Dollars to donuts, some pap with a zoom lens or some _person_ with a cell phone camera is taking a photo as we speak and some copywriter is typing a headline about how I'm drowning my sorrows in Corona." Holding up a bottle, Adam toasted the sky. 

Leila slapped his hand. "You're paranoid."

"Yeah, I think I'm living proof that just because you're paranoid, it doesn't mean that they aren't out to get you." Adam took a long drink from his bottle, then set it down on the little table. "Okay. Lane, what's your idea? What do you think I should do? Go to some fancy schmancy restaurant with a new guy, go out with my mom to a show, go to the movies with Neil, go to a club opening with Brad, to a concert with Alisan, show up at the playground with Emmaline and the Cherry boys? Ideas here?"

"Actually..." Lane took a breath and decided to dive in. "Go to Ryan's party. It's this Friday, the thirteenth. It's not really public, but it gets you out, seen by the people who need to see that you're doing fine."

Adam pressed his lips together, then opened his mouth but before he could refuse, his mother spoke up and he sat back. 

"You think about it. And before that? Today," Leila said before Adam could instantly refuse. "Today is the day, my beautiful boy, that you go back home again. It's time. You have things you need to do."

 

_A few hours later:_

You will do this, it won't hurt, Adam told himself not long thereafter, because his mother had a talent for moving people around even when they didn't want to go. She should be some something in the Army, the person who moved battalions of guys around. And really, he would be tough about this and suck it up. He tightened his hand around the small box, nodded and stomped across the threshold into their, his, his bedroom and then slowed down en route to the closet. Hmm. 

He took a deep breath and realized that it wasn't as bad as he expected or as it had been weeks ago, because now he was calm enough to realize that it didn't feel like their bedroom, not without Kris' ugly plaid shirts missing the hamper or his groddy sneakers somehow sliding in next to his designer boots. Passing the mirror he saw that his mouth was curved up and he realized he was remembering the time Kris had kicked his disgustingly dirty sneakers onto Adam's python boots -- the boots he had babied for years -- and Kris had argued, then gotten wise and pulled out the naughty stool kept in their bedroom closet after they'd moved into this house with Dani and Emmaline. 

Now, his closet was neat and organized and... oh fuck, there was one of Kris' stools. The really naughty stool they kept here for... Well, notgonnathinkaboutthatrightnow. He turned on his heel, opened the built-in dresser drawers, and carefully placed the bright blue little box in the empty drawer that had once been Kris' tee-shirt drawer. Lane and his mother had done exactly as he'd requested and removed all traces of Kris, so of course the drawers were empty. Empty. 

Except... he squinted as he caught the glint of a pale green something in the drawer. Sticking his hand into the drawer, he felt along the edge and pried out a piece of plastic that was too carefully wedged between the bottom and side slats of the drawer to be an accident. Gently tugging, he smiled with brief satisfaction when it pulled loose and he plucked it out, only to stop when he saw what was in his fingertips. 

The little plastic sword from their first date. 

Flipping the sword into his palm, he stared at it. Kris had kept it all these years? Really? Well, d'uh, doofus, of course he kept it, it's right here in your hand. 

_  
Adam laughed as he poked at a tiny umbrella and a motley assortment of swizzle sticks. "Did someone go geocaching in the woods after a party?"_

_"That would be kinda stupid." Kris watched Adam's polished fingernail poke at the sticks and then laughed. "Hey, look -- "_

_"Ha! A little sword like you'd use to spear an olive." Adam pulled the little green sword out and held it up. "A pirate sword!"_

_Kris gave a loud gasp. "They knew our theme!"_

_"It's destiny," Adam said solemnly, then his lips curved into a smile mocking himself._

_"I think it is..." Kris said softly. Shaking his head to clear it, he asked, "Where's our doubloon?"_

_"You were the one in charge of the doubloons. And the glitter. You are failing your audition."_

_"Hmm.." Kris snatched the sword. Fearful of losing it, he tucked it into his shirt pocket, snapping the flap closed, before leaning into Adam. "Is there any way I can improve my rating? Like say..." He reached up to press a kiss against the divot at the base of Adam's neck. "With a kiss?"_

_"Winning the position might require quite a few of those..." Adam said with a smile, then let out a soft moan as Kris abruptly captured his lips with a kiss that warmed not only his lips, but began to thaw out the chill that had seem so omnipresent for the last year. Here in the cool shade of the woods, he felt quite warm._

_"So..." Kris whispered moments later when he pulled back. "Did that help with my rating?"_

 

"Oh, Kris, you were in a league of your own. You kept it. All those years," Adam whispered, shivering as a chill went up his back. "He carried this from the apartment to my house and then here, from place to place. All those years, this tiny little piece of plastic." And just weeks ago, he'd once again used a sword, not this one -- not the one he'd carefully kept -- on the geocaching trip to hell. The sword must have meant something to him, to save it and reference it again, so many years later. Kris couldn't keep track of his expensive phone and had lost it at least once a month, but he'd carefully saved this little plastic sword? All these years? 

He remembered once when his mother had humiliated him in the ritual that apparently all mothers engaged in -- showing the boyfriend the embarrassing childhood photos and dear god, the scrapbooks. Kris had laughed and smiled and "Awww'd" in all the right places. Encouraging her!

 

_  
"Moooommmm..." Adam whined. "Whyohwhyohwhy do you not only take a katrillion pictures and keep this crap, but you..." He twirled his finger in circles. "Make it up into books? For easy access?"_

_"We keep what's important to us so that we can always remember what's important. Sometimes..." Leila touched the pile of photo albums. "We forget the happy moments that happen day to day, but they comprise most of the puzzle of our lives, those pieces. They're what creates the edge to the puzzle. The big moments, those we'll always remember, but what makes us who we are -- are those little moments."_

_"That's awesome, Leila," Kris said softly. "There're are a lot of people who would give anything to have their mom want to remember the details of their lives, Adam."_

_Biting his lip as he recalled far too many life stories just like Kris', of people thrown away by their parents and forgotten thereafter, Adam nodded. "You're right. But still, Mom? The junior high photos? There should be a law!"_

_"Hey, at least your mom doesn't have them on display!" Kris laughed. "My brother and I..." He paused, squared his shoulders and went on. "We always called the downstairs hall in our house the Hallway to Hell because my mother had it lined with pictures of us. Like the worst pictures ever. Those third grade pictures where you're missing a tooth and your hair is sticking up? Yeah, those."_

_"Is that where the picture of you as Little Mr. Little Rock is?" Adam teased. "One day, I'm going to get a copy of that picture."_

_"Oh, hell to the no!" Kris rejoined, then flipped a page and began laughing at a photo of Adam in some hideous outfit he'd thought was ultracool in ninth grade._

_"Just goes to prove that fashion is a fickle mistress," Adam sighed and sat down next to Kris on the couch to give commentary. "Really, I'd like to forget that hairstyle too. What the hell was I thinking?" A little while later, he blinked as a flash went off. "Mom!"_

_"What?" Leila grinned. "This is one of those little moments. When Adam sat down to actually look at my scrapbooks. With his very cute boyfriend," she added, knowing Kris was going to blush. And he did._

_"Ummm... Leila?" Kris asked. "Could you take a picture of the two of us with my phone? I don't have any."_

_"Sure!" Leila took the phone from Kris' hand and snapped some pictures, smiling herself at the happiness on Adam's face as he put his arm around Kris and Kris wiggled closer._

_Taking the camera back, Kris grinned as he flicked through the pictures. "Thanks. This is a moment I want to remember. I'm like you -- I keep little mementoes of stuff I want to remember too."_

 

And the plastic sword from their first date was apparently one of them? But... Adam pressed his lips together and slammed the drawer. 

Well. One room down. He was going to go through this entire house today and just get over himself. He stomped his way into the bedroom, belatedly realizing that stomping worked better when you had boots on instead of bare feet. He forced himself to stare at the bed. Damn. So many memories, so much sex, but... what he was remembering was not the sex, but the way Kris almost always wiggled on top of him in the night. While he was sleeping. That was... Adam clenched his hands, then realized he still had the sword in it. 

_  
Turning toward the window, Adam chuckled to himself when Kris grumbled in his sleep at the shifting position and then rubbed his nose against Adam's shoulder before finding a spot he apparently liked. Lying on top of Adam once again. Adam kissed Kris' messy hair and looked unseeingly at the horizontal streaks of yellowish light shining through the slats of the cheap plastic white mini-blinds. Kris had mentioned once that he did not sleep well, but last night Adan had been the one lying awake for long stretches and not just at three am and not because he was wondering why he was alone. No._

_And he wasn't awake just because of Kris' apparent night-time genetic mutation when he transformed into a clinging vine. No, to that too. He smiled down at Kris, then looked toward the window again, noting that from the way the light was now hitting the lenses of Kris' glasses perched on the windowsill that it must be time to wake up. Or for Kris to wake up, since he had to go to work early today._

_It hadn't been a bad night, being awake. He had written most of the lyrics to a new song, one he was sure was better than most of what was on deck for his album. And not so coincidentally, he had realized that his heart had been seeing the truth better than his head._

_"Whassgoinon?" Kris mumbled the next morning, reaching out to touch Adam's chest. That was what had woken him up -- the shaking. "Did we have an earthquake?"_

_"No..." Adam patted Kris' back, while holding in his laughter. No earthquake, but something had shaken loose inside him over the course of the night. Each time Kris had woken him up by reaching out in his sleep to hold on to him, that tight hard knot of distrust had loosened its hold. He had not slept much, but he had thought a lot and had felt even more._

 

That song he'd written that night, _Shaken Loose_ , had always been one of his favorites. The song had longing, vulnerability and a quiet joy of which he'd never tired. It had been a cut on his third album, one he'd fought hard to include, but sang only for Kris in private. Never in public, because he often choked up, the tightness in his throat preventing him from achieving the delicate tone he wanted in order to evoke that night and how Kris' unconscious clinging had loosened the protective bands around his heart. 

Then again, maybe the delicate tone had been wrong. Maybe he should have sung it balls to the walls, because those tight bands hadn't melted away like butter on a warm croissant, but had snapped. Maybe he should pull up the master to that song again, think about it. Yeah, that would be a good distraction or then again, maybe he should write a new song, one he could use to sing out his pain and fear and anger. Work through it that way. 

Music room. Standing in front of it, rolling the little plastic sword in his hand, Adam took a deep breath. He shoved the door open and flicked the light on, then stopped. Kris' guitar was gone, but his piano was still here and worse, worse, worse....

That damn ugly fucking _ugly_ orange mushroom chair was still here.

He couldn't believe Kris was gone but his fucking ugly orange mushroom chair was here. How was that fair? Glaring at it, he walked around the room, rolling the sword in his hand again, his eyes drawn to the chair like a freeway driver rubbernecking an accident. Hmm. If he sat in the chair, then he wouldn't have to see it.

Only, when he sat down in the chair, he was seeing it. Seeing it at the center of so many memories. Kris sitting in the chair, playing his guitar or reading a book to Emmaline or listening to Adam sing a line or two from a new piece or running lines with Adam for an acting gig and -- damn, Kris had sucked at that! Or...Adam dug the point of the sword into his palm as he forced himself to remember the most dangerous memories of this chair of all. The night Kris had sat in this chair and blurted out, "I love you" as if it were a revelation. Could it be....

Closing his hand carefully, Adam looked up as Lane tentatively peeked her head around the door. "Come in." He closed his eyes and felt the edges of the fragile plastic sword in his hand. If he held it too tightly, it would snap. "I get it. You want me to make a public appearance."

"I'm not going to harp at you about it. Make up your own mind," Lane said, her voice soft as she looked down at Adam, with his eyes closed, sitting so still -- which was always a bad bad thing -- in the music room. In... Well. This was interesting. Maybe Adam being still was not a bad thing. Maybe it was time for a change. 

"Are you talking that quietly because I'm like a wild animal that needs taming?" Adam asked, opening one eye to stare up at Lane.

"Yes." Lane smiled, then touched Adam's knee. "Actually, I'm talking that quietly because you're probably tired of all the voices talking at you. I can leave if you want."

"No, I told you to knock if I didn't come out in two hours. And you did. I have to give you credit for persistence." Adam leaned back, then opened his hand and looked at the little sword. "You know, my father said to me once that the art of love is largely the art of persistence. Some guy named Albert Ellis said it. I think it's true."

"Your father reads a lot," Lane said, prevaricating. Well, if Adam believed love required persistence, then he should appreciate the full court press Kris was going to engage in. She was dying to know what was coming after fruit and nuts.

Adam rolled his head along the top edge of the chair. "So, anyway. You love me and you want me to do what?"

"Go to Ryan's party."

"Oh yeah, _there's_ an idea. A really great one, Laney. Go to Ryan's party full of what Kris calls fake reporters who sharpen their teeth at night instead of sleeping. Because you know, sharks don't sleep?"

"Yes. I sat up with Kris watching the Shark Week show on Tivo that time he had food poisoning too." 

Adam grimaced. Poor Kris. And his poor boots. And that food poisoning? Well, that had been real. Way too real.

_  
"My boots are goners," Adam told Lane as she came into the hospital room. "Goners."_

_"I threw up all over you... I'm so so sorry." Kris moaned in sleepy embarrassment. "Everyone saw, didn't they? Tell me that no fan was backstage and got that on a cell phone camera? Tell me, even if you have to lie. Oh, who cares? I think I'd like to die now. "_

_"Me too. I loved those boots. They cost the earth and were amazingly awesome." Adam sighed._

_"They were boring," Kris muttered. "In a bad way." They hadn't suited Adam._

_"Says the guy with fifteen cream plaid shirts?" Arching an eyebrow, Adam shook his head._

_"They have a cream base with different colors!?" Kris argued, then winced. His throat was still sore. He realized he'd put a hand on it, when Adam jumped to his feet and handed him a bottle of some electrolyte liquid with a straw. He had to keep drinking, in addition to the IV in his hand, to replace all the liquids he'd lost, including with one particularly orange spray over Adam's poor boots. "I wasn't aiming for them."_

_"Humph. You never liked them. Either of you." Adam smiled and took the bottle back from Kris._

_"I told you cream suede boots were a bad idea," Lane noted. "I said that they were ridiculously impractical and were going to end up filthy dirty and good only for the dust bin and I was right!"_

_"Yes, Mom." Adam rolled his eyes. "They looked like your chair, actually, Kris. Cream with orange blotches and--"_

_"Ugh, stop it!" Kris begged, then slumped as a wave of exhaustion swept over him. He shifted uncomfortably in the bed. "And don't make fun of my chair. I'd like to be home in it right now, curled up..." He paused. "Adammmm..."_

_"I am not having the world's ugliest chair shipped out here. Fuggaboutit."_

_"On the other hand..." Lane grinned as Kris pouted in Adam's direction and Adam looked away, no doubt so he wouldn't be tempted to surrender. "You could ship it out and something accidental could happen en route."_

_"Totally. That would be_ tragic _!" Adam teased, reaching out to smooth Kris' hair down and smiling as Kris' eyes began to droop. He gently took Kris' glasses off and moved them to the bedside table._

_"It would be," Kris mumbled, wiggling around in the bed. "Adammm, thanks for carrying me, even though it wasn't very manly of me...."_

_"That's okay, he liked it," Lane teased. "It was his chance to play white knight."_

_"Great. I was a damsel in distress?" Kris yawned and reached his IV-free hand out to touch Adam's. "Love you and---"_

_"Yeah?" Adam waited and when Kris slumped, he looked over at Lane. "Asleep?"_

_Lane nodded and stood up. "Well, I'm going back to my nice hotel bed. Have a good night in that chair. It may be more attractive than the orange mushroom, but I bet it's not as comfortable."_

_Waving good night to Lane, Adam sat down again in the chair next to the bed and leaned back, only to jerk up from an uncomfortable sleep when he heard Kris' voice, garbled._

_"Adammm... S'sorry 'bout boots..."_

_Blinking the sleep from his eyes and rubbing the crick in his neck, Adam bent forward, only to realize that Kris was talking in his sleep again. Oh crap, sleepwalking might be next which would be disastrous with that iv in his hand. He reached over the bed to pull up the railings only to be stopped by Kris' hand on his arm. "Kris, shhhh. Back to sleep."_

_"Booots? Mad? Bed? Whynt you in bed? Buy you boots, money, Geoffrey, boots..."_

_"You're sick. Shhh..."_

_"Got to find Adammm... Boootzzz..." Kris shoved Adam's arm and rolled over, clearly intent upon getting out._

_Sighing, Adam put his hand on Kris' chest and gently pushed. "Shh. I'm right here." Giving in, Adam kicked off his flipflops and gingerly climbed onto the bed next to Kris, smiling when Kris gave a long sniff, shivered, then rolled next to him, flinging his leg over Adam's thighs, holding him in place._

 

"Well, that was bloody awful real, that incident," Lane said with a wrinkled nose.

"You're right." Adam wrinkled his nose back. "My poor boots." 

"This party will be nothing compared to that trauma," Lane offered. "Given how much those boots cost."

"That party. That UnValentine's Day party of Ryan's?" Adam prevaricated. "The guests, the theme. Shoot me now. I might as well go swimming with sharks. Without the tank around me."

"I'll go with you. I'll be your tank. And...Geoffrey will be there." Lane kicked the leg of the chair when Adam said nothing and merely pursed his lips.

"Will he? I... can handle it." Adam pushed back into the chair. It was ugly, but comfortable. Kris' rallying cry had been that the chair was comfortable. Of course it was only comfortable because Adam had it re-stuffed every time Kris left town for more than a day. The last time the upholsterer had been forced to line the original fabric because it was starting to fray and Adam had been afraid Kris wouldn't recover from the trauma. He burst out, "Hell, I've handled this fucking ugly chair in my house for years, haven't I? I can survive anything." 

"Yes," Lane laughed. The ugly mushroom chair. Why the bloody hell Adam hadn't thrown out this chair when he'd had her box up Kris' other stuff and bring it to him at Geoffrey's was beyond her. It was his chance and he'd blown it and... Why? "Are you punishing yourself by sitting in the world's ugliest chair?"

"I had my eyes closed so I wasn't seeing it." I was seeing something else, Adam thought. Memories, so many memories were in this chair. The mushrooms had seen...

Sitting down on the floor in front of the chair. Lane tapped her fingers on Adam's knees. "What were you seeing?"

"I..." Adam dropped his head and saw the memories of the chair flip past him like a vid on slo-mo. The first time they had told each other they loved each other had been in this chair and... He gave a low inarticulate moan. That couldn't have been false. Right?

"Adam, are you okay? I don't want you losing it on my feet."

"I'm not okay. I'm trying to be okay, but I'm so confused. I was seeing Kris in this chair. He kept this stupid _ugly_ chair. I offered him new chairs, new couches, new guitars, actual money -- _anything_ he wanted to get rid of this chair. He was so damn prickly, such a hedgehog about this stupid chair. It would have made more sense to just give in to me, wouldn't it? If he..." Adam bit his lip, then continued. "If he were just trying to scam me, wouldn't it have been easier to be more easy-going instead of being a hedgehog? Give up world's ugliest chair?"

"But he wouldn't. I know." Lane hesitated, then reminded him, "He said it was because this chair was part of his past, a past he didn't want to forget and because he'd made a memory in this chair that was so beautiful he didn't see the ugliness of the chair any more, only how amazing the moment in this chair had been. Do you know..." 

"I know. I was...there."   
__

_Knowing he was no doubt grinning like... a man in love, Adam kissed Kris' thigh and bent his head to his task again. Gently scraping the razor along the sensitive skin, then reaching for the washcloth to wipe the area clean, he pondered again how he should tell Kris that he loved him. He'd almost done it a moment ago, but really, this hadn't seemed like the moment, but maybe that was wrong, maybe he really should stop over-thinking and planning and --_

_"Adam, I love you!" Kris blurted out._

_"Wha--haa--aaa-what?" Adam gurgled, his hand jerking before he stilled it by what he was sure was the most extreme act of self control he'd had to wield since he didn't punch Danny Gokey in the face on a daily basis while having to share a tour bus with him. He pulled the razor away from Kris' balls and stared up into Kris' beaming face. "What?"_

_"I love you."_

_"Wha--aaa--what?" Adam leaned back on his heels, holding the razor out in his right hand and the washcloth in his left. He looked in confusion at them, then back at Kris, wondering why Kris didn't seem to be affected by the buzzing in his ears. "You what?"_

_Kris burst out laughing. "You look like a shaving traffic cop or something."_

_"Well then, stop! You can't tell me something like that while I'm SHAVING YOUR BALLS! With a RAZOR!"_

_Still laughing, Kris reached out and gently curled his hands over Adam's wrists and pushed them towards the floor. "Put down the dangerous objects.... There you go...."_

_"No. Here you go." Adam tossed the razor and washcloth into the bowl, shoved aside the stool and moved forward. His hands grasped Kris' thighs and pulled them around his body as his head descended and took Kris' mouth in a kiss, desperate to get closer and closer still and there, that was the moment, that would be good, but damn it, hurrrrrry... "Lube..."_

_"Adam!" Kris gasped as Adam leaned down to grab the condom. He ripped open the packet, slid it on his cock, then with fingers Kris noticed were trembling slightly, squeezed out some lube._

_"Open your legs for me." Adam bit his lower lip hard as he fought for control as his fingers spread the slick lube around. "Need you now..."_

_"Whatever you need, sweetie..." Kris cried out as Adam's cock brushed against his balls, then down along the valley of his body before pressing against him. "Adamm..."_

_"Hold on, just..." Adam took a deep breath, then lifted his left hand to frame Kris' face and his right hand to help guide himself inside, feeling more free than he had in ...forever. As his cock entered Kris' body, he cried out, "I love you too. I need... I need you to take me in and hold me."_

_"Yessss!" Kris exclaimed as Adam filled him, body and heart, his hardness entering Kris' flesh, his mouth covering Kris' lips and his heartfelt words echoing in Kris' ears and reverberating in his heart, the pounding of his heart echoed by the rhythm of their bodies meeting._

_Their lips clung together, lifting to whisper soft words of great need as their hands caressed and pulled each other closer and closer, their hearts wishing the moment could last forever, even as their bodies took them to this ending, that was just another beginning._

_Resting their heads against each other's shoulders, holding on tightly, they both sighed. Adam kissed Kris' shoulder, then said, "I did not complete my task."_

_"Huh?" Kris turned his head and slowly kissed Adam's neck, kissing his way up to Adam's jaw, nipping at it. "I feel complete."_

_"Mmm. Good. But I said I'd shave you, suck you, lick you, rim you and fuck you. Didn't rim you."_

_"Mmm. Later." Kris sighed and nestled back into Adam's embrace. He began to laugh. "You said you loved me. While sliding into me. It was... perfect."_

_"Was it? I was debating about how to tell you."_

_"Were you trying to come up with some grand scheme?"_

_"Yeah. I was deciding on geocaching. I was going to put a note in a box somewhere and then make you find it."_

_"Oh, that would've been fun, but..." Kris grinned. "The look on your face -- when I told you myself -- was awesome." He laughed. "Ha. I shocked you for once."_

_"Mr. Thirty-eight Cents, you've been shocking me since you turned around in Starbucks." Adam smiled and kissed Kris, taking his time to gently kiss his lips, then slowly delve inside, exploring and then claiming, just as they had done throughout their relationship._

_Slowly opening his eyes after a long kiss that both satisfied and made him want to start all over again, Kris sighed as Adam finally slipped from his body. "And the way you told me?" He grinned as he remembered Adam's rush and then the rush of desire as he'd thrust inside him and said the words Kris needed to hear. At the same time. "Great timing as always, Lambert."_

_"The great thing is we can do this again...." Adam whispered, starting to stand up as Kris clung to him with tight hands. "I'll be right back."_

_Kris held onto Adam's hand. "I love you. I do."_

_"I know. I believe you," Adam told him since Kris seemed to need him to say it. "I love you too." Adam lifted Kris' hand to his mouth and kissed the palm. "Hold on to it."_

 

Adam rubbed his thumb over a mushroom. Or what was supposed to be a mushroom. "He even wrote a song about the chair. He wanted it to be on his cd."

Lane waited as the silence lengthened. It was not an uncomfortable silence, not this time. Adam seemed... calm. Focused. He was touching each blotch of a mushroom the way she'd seen Kris touch the freckles on Adam's back when Adam was sleeping one time. She held her breath, waiting, then finally offered, "The song was the working title of the cd. _Orange Mushroom Chair_."

"I know that too. I... loved that song. Even though it seemed to be about the ugly chair. I knew what it was really about. Or I thought I did. Then I thought I didn't. And now, maybe, maybe... I did." 

Looking at the constellation of orange-brown blotches and trying to hide her excitement at Adam's words, Lane shook her head. It would be hysterical if, in the end, all of their plans and arguments meant nothing in comparison to the power of the world's ugliest chair. She suggested, "Perhaps there is more to this chair than meets the eye."

"Life is funny like that, isn't it?" Adam smiled and closed his eyes again, seeing the orange mushrooms on tan nubby fabric like the background to his life. Really, it should have more glitter or something to cover up... Then again, maybe not. Maybe real was beautiful enough. "So. What should I wear?"

 

 _That weekend_ :

"Great jacket, Adam. And...You know...We have a lot in common," Ryan began, curling his hands around the pipe that formed the railing on the balcony. He wasn't surprised that Adam had retreated out here. The abrupt susseration of whispers that occurred amongst the guests, like an undertow in the ocean when Adam had walked in the room had no doubt sounded like the hissing of snakes. Then, when the snakes turned into sharks and began circling, Adam had grabbed not one but two drinks and retreated out to the balcony, Lane standing guard at the door. 

"Do we?" Adam asked, waiting. Ryan had been incredibly nice throughout this whole ordeal, giving warnings and not reporting in the same salacious manner that Access Hollywood and other outlets had. He wasn't going to forget Jacob's comments, however, that Ryan wanted an exclusive in return for the warnings he'd given. There was no free lunch or... He looked at his appletinis, free drinks in Hollywood. Everything had a price. Even the incredible view of the lights of LA from this balcony.

Ryan grinned as he looked back at Lane. Formidable woman. He was probably lucky Lane had allowed him through. To his own balcony. Damn, he wished he could hire her away. Oh well, focus on what you could get. And one thing he did get, was Adam. "When I was in high school, I was the overweight geek in glasses."

"Well, at least I didn't have glasses." 

"Well, at least I wasn't gay."

"About that..." Adam smirked. 

"Anyway. A legacy of those days is that I always feel as though I have to try a little harder to be liked, to be accepted. I'm never quite sure if someone likes me for me or because I have the answers to the math homework. You know?"

"Well, no one was ever asking for me for math homework answers, but yeah, I get the drift."

"Do you? Do you feel like I do sometimes that this..." Ryan spread his hands out toward the glittering lights of Los Angeles. "Is all an illusion, a dream that someone could take away, wake you up from and you'd be back in your bed, dreading to go to school in the morning? Afraid that they're talking about you behind your back or-- "

Adam blinked in surprise. Ryan felt like that too? "I think those are called anxiety dreams."

"What the fuck ever, Lambert. My point--" 

"You do have one? Fantastic."

"My point is that sometimes it's easier and safer to imagine a slight and a hurt when none was _intended_ and to pull back than take a risk. Now, I know in your case that you have never lacked for courage, but you are stubborn."

"Have you been talking to my mother?" Adam asked suspiciously.

"Why? Does she have an opinion on how you should respond to Kris' attempts to chase you?" 

"What?"

"Didn't you know? This evening he tweeted saying you two were fighting and asking for ideas to suck up to you. He's got the entire twitterverse sending him ideas." Ryan pulled his phone out, went to Twitter then handed it to Adam.

**KrisAllen @OrangeMushroomMan  
Had fight w/ BF. Need ideas to suck up to him. Help! Now! Pleez!**

"Oh hell!" Adam began to laugh and handed Ryan's phone back. Then laughed some more. That little shit.

"It's good to hear you laugh," a British voice said from the door. A British voice that was not Lane's. Another little shit, well, slightly taller shit. 

"Geoffrey." Adam nodded and looked back at the glittering lights of LA laid out before him.

Ryan looked from Adam to Geoffrey and back again. "You know... I think I'll leave you to it, then."

"Thanks, Ryan," Geoffrey said with a nod and grateful smile. "I know it will drive you mad not to listen to this conversation."

"I figure you can give me an exclusive on something juicy in the future."

"The art of the deal." Geoffrey nodded as Ryan left. "The art of the deal is how I got into this mess."

"Do tell," Adam drawled, still looking out at the lights. He had to give Geoffrey credit for persistence.

"Adam..." Geoffrey clenched his palms around the railings and then turned around and looked back inside through the wall of glass. He smiled involuntarily when he saw his wife looking at him with worry clearly on her face. Then he looked from Teresa back to Adam. "You know, on New Year's Day when we fought about what I'd done, I was trying to make the comparison about how you blindsided me with Teresa's presence at your party in order to set us up. And you rejected my analogy rather forcefully."

Adam spun back around to stare at Geoffrey. "I believe I told you to go fuck yourself."

"Indeed. Always colorful." Geoffrey smiled wryly. "I now see _your_ point that it's not an apt comparison because I immediately knew what you were doing. I could see that your actions were transparent and mine were not. I was focused on the outcome and not the process."

"Because Teresa told you to see it?"

"Something like that. She makes me a better person. And it's not relevant that I wouldn't have cared how you set us up, as long as you did. We have different points of view on matters like this. And yours _is_ as valid as mine. I acknowledge that."

"You ... Lane told me that you told Kris to tell me multiple times. About this deal."

"I did. And I've always felt Kris has to be the one to tell you. Even now, I believe that. But in the beginning he refused and then I told him to just shut his mouth forever."

Adam froze. "Is that what you meant, the night of the Jingle Ball, when we debuted as a couple and you were urging him to tell me anything I wouldn't want the world to know first? When you said speak now or forever hold your peace?"

"Yes. Then over time, I realized that advice was wrong and that the longer it went on, the more it would hurt when, as was inevitable, the truth will out." Geoffrey paused. "But clearly that's water under the bridge. I detest what you Americans call coulda woulda shouldas. The point is what _you_ think. And... I was just looking at Teresa and remembering our wedding day. When you and Kris wrote and sang a song."

" _The Sweetest Chance Is the Second Chance_...." Adam answered automatically.

"Did you believe that when you wrote it?" Geoffrey pressed. "That second chances are beautiful and should be prized rather than thrown away, that they are sweeter than the first meeting because you now know what you have to lose and what you have to win? Did you believe that when you wrote it or not?"

Adam sucked his upper lip into his mouth and glared at Geoffrey. He finally burst out, "I fucking hate you, you know that!" He stopped. His mother would have washed his mouth out with Lava soap for that. Geoffrey was not Brian, after all. His intentions were no doubt good, even if his process had blown chunks. "Sorry. That was uncalled for. But damn, you piss me off, Geoffrey!"

"Because I might be right? This time?" Even if he'd also been right about Kris being perfect for Adam, but it would be a terrible strategy to suggest that at this critical juncture. A wise man knew when to shut his bloody mouth. Geoffrey pressed his lips together.

"You could negotiate your way out of hell and the Devil would somehow think he got the better part of the deal."

"If only because it meant I left?"

"Something like that." Adam nodded, then handed one of his drinks to Geoffrey. He smiled, then changed his voice to a high-pitched cackle and told him, "It's an appletini."

"Am I Snow White?"

"You won't _die_." Adam waited while Geoffrey took a long sip, then added, "You'll just get a terrible case of diarrhea."

"Pffft!" Geoffrey spat the drink, then began laughing. He pulled out a handkerchief and wiped his mouth. "I deserved that."

"That's the least of what you deserve." Adam shrugged. "Can I ask you when you got the idea? To set Kris up to meet me in Starbucks?"

"Hannah and I had met him and we'd both had the idea that he would be a good match for you, personality-wise. Plus he was your type. Then..." Geoffrey drained the drink in one long slug. "You came in one day while we were looking at headshots on the conference table. Being your normal nosey self, you started looking at them. You may not have realized it, but although you were looking at all of them, your eyes kept going back to his photo."

 

_"You like that--"_

_"Don't." Adam rolled his eyes and shuffled the pictures back together in a stack. "There are quite a few cute boys in that pile, but I am not using your head shot files to troll for dates."_

_"But--" Geoffrey began, then started to chuckle. He knew what Adam was going to do._

_"Here we go..." Hannah muttered under breath._

_Adam began to laugh, then started to sing, "Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match. Find me a find, catch me a catch!" He stopped and then shook his finger at Geoffrey. "Except not. Do not even go there."_

_"But what if I found the perfect guy and just wanted to set you up? Would you cut off your nose to spite your face?"_

_"Probably." Leila smiled as she walked in the room. "My son may be the most stubborn boy on the planet."_

 

Adam looked intently at Geoffrey. He had a vague recollection of that day, largely because of his mother's comment. "As Kris has said more than once, there's stubborn, then there's stupid."

"I've made more than my share of stupid choices. I've said it before, but not face to face." Geoffrey put his hand on Adam's shoulder. "I apologize. I hope you can forgive me. I know the road to hell is famously paved with good intentions, but... I met him and just believed with all my heart that he was the right guy for you. Again, I apologize."

Nodding slowly, Adam sighed. "I...accept."

"I realize you may want or need proof and I have these videos..." Geoffrey began, then stopped when Adam held up a hand.

"Not yet. I've been thinking a lot lately, remembering and... you've always done right by me. If anything, you were too paternalistic, but I know your heart was in the right place. I'm glad to know that it was about setting _Kris_ up with me, not some random guy who fits my type. I'm still angry with you, though," he warned. "It's going to take me time."

"Understood. I'm grateful that you're willing to give me that second chance and-- " Geoffrey broke off. He was not going to tell Adam what to do. But he could ask questions. "I'm truly not trying to be pushy, but--"

Adam laughed. "But you can't help it? Not like I can get snitty about that since being pushy is my general M.O. So go on. Say it."

"But the videos, I really think would help and...Are you going to answer Kris' phone calls one day soon or agree to talk to him?" 

"I heard what you said about second chances. I take your point." Looking from Geoffrey's cautiously hopeful and relieved face to the wall of glass, Adam snorted. Although there had been no serious gossip that he had been considering breaking his contract with Geoffrey, Hollywood was a small town. And right now everyone was making no pretense of doing anything other than watching them. He smiled and then waved at the crowd. "I believe we're the floor show for tonight."

"If I'd known I was the floor show, I would've worn feathers."

"And I'd have brought my glitter."

 

 _The following Monday_ :

Leila looked over at Adam, who was sitting on her couch, once again. This time he was intently reading the thousands of tweets Kris had gotten in response to his request for advice on sucking up to Adam. Kris had done well, Leila thought, only explaining -- thank god for the confines of 140 characters -- only that he and Adam were fighting and he wanted advice on how to suck up to him. She'd stopped reading the suggestions since many of the fans had taken the 'suck it up' comment a little too literally. 

"This one's good...." Adam murmured, laughing out loud. He elbowed his mother to show her, then grinned when she shook her head. 

"The Tonight Show is almost on. It's Monday and I like the Headlines segment. Will you go get the popcorn before it burns already? You know if you let it go too long, it burns." Leila elbowed Adam.

"I don't want popcorn. You made potatoes for dinner."

"You're too skinny." Leila turned to pinch her son's waist. "See? Nothing there."

"I look good," Adam answered automatically as he laughed again at the tweets. "And since when are you so hyper about Leno?"

"Since you've turned into a couch potato hanging out on my couch to read Twitter, preventing me doing anything productive. Besides I _always_ watch on Monday nights. I like Headlines, you know that." Leila flicked her finger at her son's forehead. "Go get me the popcorn. The microwave beeped but I can still hear kernels popping. Go, now."

"A criticism and an order for slave labor. I thought..." Adam sniffed melodramatically as he got up and went into the kitchen. He opened the microwave door and pulled out the popcorn by its fingertips. "I thought I was your favorite."

"Don't be silly. Everyone knows the baby is always the favorite."

Adam sniffed again. "Now I'm glad I burned this stupid popcorn. And everyone wonders where I get my bitchy tendencies from."

"Be quiet. I'm watching my show." Leila looked up abruptly as she heard Adam's laughter. "Baby... are you....?"

"Potato... You got potatoes on my leather..." Adam chuckled. "Remember that Thanksgiving? Neil was a whining baby about how he should be the favorite and being such a bitch and Kris threw potatoes at him? I wish we had a picture of the mashies all over Neil's face."

Leila's eyes widened. Adam was laughing again about Kris? Well. The way to Adam's heart was definitely not through his stomach, but his funny bone might be a good route. "Come out here. Let's talk--" She broke off as the announcer's voice began.

"It's the Tonight Show with Jay Leno! Tonight's special guest is Kris Allen!"

Leila jumped as she heard a loud crash and a string of curses from the kitchen. "What was that?"

"I dropped the popcorn bowl and... " I'm about to freak out, Adam thought as he looked at the scattershot of popcorn across the tile floor. He flipped open the cabinet door under the sink and reached for the dustpan and hand broom. Yup, he was just going to clean up the popcorn. No hurry. Nope. 

"Fuggaboutit! Get out here."

Seeing his hands shake as he brushed the popcorn into the trash, Adam retorted, "You sounded so New Jersey." 

"That's where I'm from. Get your ass out here and let's see what's going on."

"I don't get it..." Adam said as he backed into the room staring at the tv. Kris was on Leno? Of his own free will? 

"Get here!" Leila growled, grabbing Adam's belt loop and tugging him down next to her on the couch.

"He hates doing promo and interviews..." Adam said in shock, reaching for the little green plastic sword on the coffee table and rolling it between his fingers.

"Maybe he loves you enough that he's willing to put himself through it."

Pointing the sword at the tv, Adam explained, "I... I don't want a sacrificial lamb. I just want someone to love me."

"Save it for a song lyric. Shh!" 

 

"So, Kris." Jay shook his head and leaned forward. "Based upon what I'm hearing in the tabloids, your life has taken an interesting turn. You wanta explain what's going on?"

"I do. Thanks for having me on so I can explain. I 'preciate it." Kris gulped, then fumbled for the mug of water before he choked to death on his own spit. That is, if he had any, which he doubted since his throat was so dry. 

Filling in the dead air as Kris visibly worked to control his fear, Jay explained, "Now, I know for a fact that you don't care for the spotlight very much and yet you called me yourself -- using my mechanic as the go-between -- to ask if you could come on the air."

"Yeah. I'm so sorry because... It's my fault that Adam's name is bein' drug through the mud right now by nasty gossiping biddies who call themselves journalists and so it's my duty to fix it. It's my fault."

" _Your_ fault? Are you that so-called former associate selling a story to the tabloids?"

"No, no!" Kris waved his hands as if wiping something clean. "No, that is some other as--- I mean, dude. Who seems to have stolen my phone and gotten information from it that he spun into a story."

"Fine. Why don't you answer the question everyone is dying to ask. Did you take money to sleep with Adam Lambert?"

"No." Kris shook his head and repeated. "No. Absolutely not. No freaking way. No way. No how--"

"Okay, we got it. No." Jay laughed. "You said it quite emphatically."

"Well, yeah. First of all, Adam wouldn't need to pay money to get sex. I mean, have you _looked_ at the guy?" Kris asked. 

"Well, he's not exactly my type," Jay quipped. 

"He's mine!" Kris grinned. "And no way would anyone have had to pay me to sleep with him." He paused and took a deep breath. "I... took money. But I slept with him because I wanted to. I slept with him because I loved him. I lived with him and made a family with him because I loved him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Because I love him."

"But you took money."

"Yes. I never meant, we never meant... I'm so sorry that something I did has caused this nightmare to Adam. I never ever would hurt him. Never. If I'd ever known that taking that money..." Kris tried to swallow, but his throat was dry again. He grabbed for the mug again and swallowed hard. 

Jay pressed on, "From whom did you take money?"

"Geoffrey Brush. Adam's manager and the guy who's, well, it's an understatement to say that he's like a father to me. He's more a father to me than my sperm donor ever was. He also loves Adam like a son too. And he wanted us to be happy. So he was killing two birds with one stone and oh hell--" Kris slapped his hand over his mouth. "I can't say that, can I?"

"Don't worry." Jay pointed at Kris. "Go on."

"Well, I'm mucking it up. I... brought video."

"Yes, you did. Now it's my understanding that Brush videotapes all meetings in his office as a matter of course."

Kris nodded. He'd gotten through this bit in rehearsals with Jay's assistant earlier with no problems. "And he asks you first if it's okay. So it's on the up and up. This particular video is from nearly six years ago. It takes place after I'd applied to his agency for representation and been turned down. Although they had gotten me a few guitar gigs. But what you'll see here is me coming in for an appointment, thinking I was going to be offered representation. Instead I had to pass a test and got a different offer. One that changed my life for the better." 

 

_  
"I do want to make you an offer."_

_"You do?" Kris gaped. He put his hand over his chest as he felt his heart begin to pound._

_"Not for a music deal. I'm sorry." Geoffrey smiled apologetically. "I_ am _sorry. As I said at our previous meeting here weeks ago, you need time and practice and seasoning and a following. We simply do not develop artists that way any more. I do think you have potential, but you're going to have to realize it mostly on your own. All of that work is especially necessary when you're an openly gay artist."_

_"You already said that to me." Kris glared. He'd like to kill the guy for raising his hopes._

_"You don't have a poker face." Brush chuckled. "Thank god."_

_"I don't get it. Why did you call me back here to reject me again? Is this some sicko California thing -- torturing people?"_

_"Because no one in Arkansas toys with people's emotions?" Geoffrey asked skeptically. "Now, please pay attention and put your small town prejudices aside. You've made quite an impression on both me and Hannah during our various meetings with you."_

_"I did?" Kris asked in surprise. He was a low-key guy and didn't tend to make big impressions on people right away. Then again, he'd been hiding who he was back in Conway and been kinda depressed since moving out here, so maybe he was just sliding under the radar. Deliberately. Maybe he needed to think about that, since sliding under the radar hadn't gotten him anywhere. Maybe it was time to push a little. In fact, he'd felt an itch to push lately, like there was something he needed to do, that he had to_ do _something to get to where he needed to be._

_"Indeed. Are you dating anyone now?"_

_"No. And. What? What the hell--"_

_"In one of your video interviews with Hannah, you listed your favorite artists."_

_Perplexed by the abrupt change of subjects, Kris rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, so? What does liking the Beatles or Maroon 5 or Britney or Michael Jackson or Adam Lambert have to do with any of this?" He frowned._

_"Relax, Allen. We're just conversing. I noticed that when you were asked to talk about them, you became particularly animated when you talked about Lambert. There was a distinct change in your demeanor..."_

_"I love Adam Lambert. Love. Him. His voice and then there's his --" Kris broke off, feeling his face heat as he realized he'd been about to talk about Lambert's body parts with his agent. That could not be cool._

_"Glambulge." Geoffrey paused and then blurted out, "Do you think he's attractive?"_

_"Well, yeah, who wouldn't? He's like the hottest guy on the planet." Kris asked, even more confused. "Does he need a new guitarist? Oh -- is that why you asked if I think he's attractive? Because if he needs to kiss someone during_ Fever _, I'd count that as a kickass benefit to the job. I haven't played electric, but I could learn." He smiled. "In fact, I'd looooove to work with Adam Lambert."_

_"I do have an offer for you to work with him." Geoffrey took a deep breath and then his mouth opened before his brain was in gear, "As I said before, I am a romantic at heart..."_

_"Huh? Where are you going with this?" Kris asked, sliding back in his chair. Geoffrey was an attractive enough guy, he seemed really nice and was easy, if weird, to talk to and was apparently totally comfortable with the gay thing and maybe that was because he was gay -- I mean who could tell with these European dudes, but really? He was way too old for him, more like a father figure and he'd never been into that daddy stuff--_

_"Don't worry!" Geoffrey grinned as he watched Kris' face contort with surprise, dismay and a doomed effort to find a bland expression while he rejected the overture. "It's not for me. I pay enough alimony to women to prove it. And I'm morosely obsessed about the one who got away -- Teresa -- so even if you were Kristina, you wouldn't be for me."_

_"What's not for you?"_

_"You. I have a friend I'd like to set you up with."_

_"Are you kiddin' me?" Kris exclaimed. "What is this -- the home office of eharmony.com? Wait, they don't accept gays. And why are you talking about Adam Lambert? So what the hell is going on here? Does he need someone new to kiss at his concerts? A plant for tongue diving?" Kris grinned. "I'd take that job! Ooh boy, would I!"_

_"Lambert is...." Geoffrey pause to note how Kris kept coming back to the idea of kissing Adam. But still. Caution. He'd nearly screwed it up already with his eagerness and that comment about being a romantic. This deal, while rooted in romanticism, needed clear-eyed strategy. "If you're a fan, you know Lambert has a tendency to become physically excited during his live performances."_

_"Yeah. The glambulge." Kris could not resist grinning, then licked his lips._

_"It's a... problem, most often -- to be blunt -- when he doesn't have a steady boyfriend. We receive complaints about it. Many complaints." Geoffrey paused, rubbed his fingers over his mouth, then continued. "He needs a... boyfriend to help him out."_

_"Whataya want me to do? Give him a blowjob before every concert?" Kris asked indignantly, shocked at what he was hearing. "You're hiring him a boyfriend to give blowjobs so he doesn't get an erection on stage?"_

_Geoffrey rubbed his fingers over his mouth to hide his smile. Allen might have squawked, but he'd also licked his lips. "I don't need to know the details."_

_"Listen, I don't get this. There are tons of guys who'd love to...." Kris stopped as he felt a flush of heat crawl up his face like ants on a picnic table looking for the honey set out for fried chicken. "To service Adam Lambert. And to be honest, I'd love to uh meet him, but not meet him like in some alley or on the curb of Hollywood Boulevard! I'm not some whore! Or prostitute or rent boy!" Kris stood up. God, he'd never forget that night he'd been so desperate for a place to sleep he'd picked up a guy. He'd felt like such trash. "As my Gramma would say, I may be poor, but I'm not trash!"_

_"It would pay five thousand dollars a--"_

_"Fuck you! I don't know how desperate you think I am, but I'm not that desperate! So--"_

_"Really? You wouldn't do it for ten thousand dollars?"_

_"Ten thousand..." Kris goggled. "I... No. I'm not a whore, so I'm not haggling over the price. And you can go--"_

_"Sit down, son. You passed the test."_

 

Jay looked at the camera. "Stay tuned and we'll be right back with more videos from the Kris Allen reality show."

 

"What the hell was that? Who was that? And he's lost weight again!" Adam yelled, throwing his hands up in the air, then scrambling to catch the little sword as it flew over his head. Kris would kill him if he lost it. "The Kris Allen reality show? Kris hates this stuff."

"Inside voice and I..." Leila shook her head. "I...wow."

"You didn't know?"

"No idea. What do you think?"

"I... I can't believe Kris is on a talk show by himself."

"That's true." Leila nodded. "That one time, so long ago, that he was on Leno with you I thought he was going to throw up." 

"I remember," Adam agreed softly. "It was... it helped me believe in him, that he wasn't an attention whore hanging onto my coattails."

"I know. So... is he passing your tests _now_?"

Adam opened his mouth to protest, then shut it. His mother knew him too well. The only people who knew him as well were Dani and... "Kris knows me, doesn't he? He knows which buttons to press..."

"Do you trust him to push your buttons with love?"

Slicing across his throat with the sword, Adam grimaced. "Cut to the heart of it, don't you Mom?" 

 

_  
"What does that mean?" Kris challenged. "What the hell is going on? Tell me the truth."_

_"The truth is that I just want you to meet him, but I had to make sure you weren't a whore."_

_"I...wow." Kris ran his hands through his hair. "That's...blunt."_

_"Time is money. And to continue with the cliches -- the truth, they say, shall set you free."_

_"John 8:32," Kris said automatically. Seeing Geoffrey's surprise at his quick answer, he explained, "The Bible. Years of Bible study lessons. We used to get candy for identifying the passage first. I liked candy when I was a kid."_

_"The Bible, really? I thought it was Shakespeare." Geoffrey shrugged. "Ah well, who said it originally is irrelevant. The goal is the thing. Which is for you two to meet. The reason for my tests was... you know his history with those two wankers?"_

_"Yes." Kris nodded. "Damn. So you wanted to make sure I wasn't..."_

_"Indeed. My apologies for insulting you, but it was necessary." Geoffrey held out his hand and smiled when Kris shook it, accepting his apology. "So. Moving on. I want you to meet him because I think you two might be a match. But he can't know he's being set up."_

_"What?" Kris gasped, his mind reeling. "How could you think a small town boy..." He paused and thought, 'who'd slept in a trash-filled alley with rats...' He swallowed down the bitter taste of self-disgust and fear in his throat and finished, "How could I be a match for the Adam Fucking Lambert? What's goin' on? And why not, why can't I tell him?"_

_"He'll refuse to listen to you for one second after that. He'll tune you out. Because he cannot stand anyone telling him what to do. And normally I'd invite you to a party, but unfortunately I've done that a few too many times already with less than stellar choices on my part, so he's already got a forcefield up. So, no, you need to bump into him so that he thinks it's just serendipity and fate or some astrological who-ha and most of all, that he found a guy for himself. And not me."_

_"But... why me?" Kris repeated, afraid to hope, it had been so long since hope had come to fruition._

_"Good question. You're his type, which doesn't hurt. You are also into music, you're polite, you're kind, you're a mama's boy, you have a good sense of humor and can be silly, you have enough stubbornness to out-stubborn a mule when you get going but in general you're easy going, you're not infected with the Hollywood mania about unhealthy skinniness being hot, and you couldn't be bought, which given Adam's last two boyfriends..."_

_"Oh yeah. Poor guy." Kris shook his head. "So you really think... I mean, wow. I've had..."_

_"The hots for him?" Geoffrey laughed. "Yeah, Hannah and I could tell."_

_"But the rest of it -- how did you know? We haven't talked often enough for you to know all that stuff."_

_"You've had quite a few gigs here, haven't you? Hannah's talked to you every time. And she's talked to the people you've worked with."_

_"Geez! Did you run a background check too?"_

_"Of course."_

_Kris' eyes opened wide. "You're seriously... protective, aren't you?"_

_"We love the guy. You protect who you love. That's what family does."_

_"Family." Kris nodded absently. He missed having a family. And... but, focus. "I... This is weird."_

_"If someone back home--"_

_"It's Conway. Not home."_

_"I see. Okay, so if someone back there had offered to set you up on a date with a guy they thought was a good match, would you have taken them up on it?"_

_"Ignorin' the fact that would never happen? Probably." Kris bit his lip. He'd love to meet Adam Lambert, for godssakes. But he was a mess. Just this shy of being homeless. A loser or near to it._

_"So what's the hesitation?"_

_"I'm nobody goin' nowhere," Kris mumbled. "I don't even have a real nice shirt."_

_"I'd be happy to give you some money to help out."_

_"No--"_

_"You're going to throw a kindness back in my face? Is that how your mother raised you?"_

_Kris opened his mouth, then gave a low snort of laughter. "You're good."_

_"So I'm told." Geoffrey pushed a folded piece of currency across the desk towards Kris. "First of all, take this money because I'm paying you for your time today. Time is money. And I understand you called in sick to your job at McDonald's this morning to take this appointment. So I owe you. I pay my debts."_

_"But--" Kris froze as he saw the bill. He wanted to refuse, but that would buy food for weeks. And weeks. And he hadn't gotten his free breakfast this morning. And... he put his hand over his stomach. He was hungry. So tired of being hungry and tired. And having no hope. Geoffrey was offering him hope of something better, something... Was this one of those crossroads moments in life? Well, he couldn't take the right fork in the road if he'd rather eat the damn fork than walk down the road. Flushing with shame and embarrassment, he took the bill and shoved it into his pocket._

_Softly, Geoffrey said, "Okay, so moving on. Would you like to meet him? What do you have to lose?"_

_"I really don't have anything to lose by meeting him, do I?" Kris agreed, his heart pounding at the idea of meeting Adam Lambert. And... he wasn't nervous, he realized. Excited? Yeah. But not nervous, not really. It felt like...a good idea. A solid idea. It was a chance, but what had he gotten by playing it safe? Maybe it was time to do something crazy. Something extraordinary._

_"Not at all. Just meet him." Geoffrey pushed a slip of paper towards Kris. "Here's an address of a Starbucks he and his PA frequent. Hannah can help set the date and time up. So will you do it? See how it goes? Ask him out--"_

_"Wow, getting ahead of yourself, aren't you?" Kris asked, staring at the slip of paper. The key to his future? Whoa, dude. Talk about getting ahead of yourself._

_"I've succeeded in business by positively imagining the next step."_

_"Oh. Good advice.... "Kris mused. He traced the warp and weft of the denim over his knee with his fingernail. If he were positively imagining meeting Adam Lambert.... Oh god. How awesome would that be? And if he liked Adam and Adam liked him, the next step would be a real date and... a kiss and... He grinned. "I'll do it!" he laughed and leaned forward to take the slip of paper, his knees sliding down as he did so._

__Rrrrrippp __

_"Oh shit. Oh crap, now I really don't..." Kris flushed and looked away._

_"You really don't what?"_

_"I sound like freakin' Cinderella. I don't have any decent clothes." Poking his finger through the rip on his knee and pulling at the white threads silky from years of washing, Kris mumbled, "These were my best pair of jeans. Were. Forget going to a ball, I couldn't even get into a decent restaurant looking like this."_

_"Then I suppose you'll have to take some money."_

_"Borrow. Mebbe." Kris touched the pocket where he'd put the bill._

_"Fine." Geoffrey rolled his eyes and reached into his pocket for his money clip. "Here."_

_"I'm not taking that much money." Kris' eyes goggled as he saw the roll of money. "I... if I could borrow maybe twenty bucks to buy a new pair of jeans at the thrift store, I'd be mighty appreciative."_

_"Take one hundred. I don't have bills as small as a twenty." Geoffrey smiled and handed the bill over to Kris. Hopefully the boy would buy himself a steak with the rest of the money._

_"I'll return the change," Kris countered._

_"Oh ballocks." Geoffrey resisted the urge to pound his head against the desk. Kris Allen might be the most stubborn person he'd met since... Adam Lambert. Then again, he was better prepared. "I won't take it back. And I do have one other condition. Take this phone." Geoffrey slid an iPhone across the desk. "If you want to continue to get gigs, you need to be available via email to receive downloads of music and whatnot. Not negotiable."_

_Gingerly picking up the phone, Kris nodded reluctantly. Having to find time to run to the library to use the computers and internet there seriously limited his ability to look for gigs and communicate. This phone would be a godsend and maybe... maybe God was sending him some good luck. "I'll take it, with gratitude. How will I pay you back?"_

_"By being available when we call. It's a convenience for us." Geoffrey smiled. Adam was so damn busy, Kris had to be available to take his calls and messages when he was available or else the relationship would never get off the ground._

_Kris narrowed his eyes. "Is this also to make it easier for Adam to contact me?"_

_"So suspicious. Tsk tsk." Geoffrey grinned._

_"Ha. You're the man behind the curtain."_

_"And who are you? Scarecrow, Tin Man or the Lion?"_

_"I think... I'm Dorothy. But I'm not trying to get home. That home is gone. I want to find a new one."  
_

 

"And..." Kris finished as the video faded away. "I did. I found a new one. With Adam." 

"So..." Jay began. "You never told Adam about any of this?"

"No. I never told an outright falsehood. I just never told the full truth." Kris winced. "Well, 'just' isn't the right way to say that. It makes it sound less and a sin of omission isn't a lesser sin."

"I was raised Catholic, so I know all about the types of sin," Jay noted. "But if you could go back--"

"Have a do over?" Kris asked. "Yeah, if I could have a do over, I'd do everything the same way, the exact same way except for one thing. I'd definitely take the opportunity to bump into him, but I'd tell him that this... man behind the curtain -- but way more competent than Professor Marvel in Oz -- sent me to meet him because he thought we were perfect for each other." 

"So no other regrets?"

"No-- well, yes. I'd keep better track of my phone." Kris smiled in relief when the audience laughed, then shifted in his seat and wiped his sweaty hands on his jeans. "But I do wanna say one more thing. I want people to know that I always loved Adam. Always. I don't know if he knows this himself, but I was in love with him by the time he bought me a muffin to go with my coffee that day. I looked over at him and he had -- no lie -- glitter around him and all I could think of was that he was like that cheesy Carpenters' song come to life. You know the one -- _Close to You_?" 

"The one about birds?" Jay asked.

Kris nodded, then began to sing softly, "'Why do birds suddenly appear every time you walk near?'...Yeah, I know it's cheesy, but that moment... I fell into his eyes. He's just... I just... I couldn't believe my luck when he seemed interested in me, bought me a coffee and invited me to sit down. And the way the sun fell on him, making that glitter sparkle, that moment is in my brain. It's surreal. Like magic or... I don't know. It all felt so.. inevitable. Like everything in my life -- getting thrown out by my parents, getting out here, pounding the pavement, getting nowhere, but I did get somewhere. Where I was supposed to be. I felt like it was fate, that... Geoffrey and his money and his set up was irrelevant."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I _could_ have just been in that Starbucks that day and met him regardless and... It all could have really happened that way. Like it _would_ have happened that way anyway. Destiny, you know?"

"That's very romantic. I'm pretty sure when I go home my wife will ask why I never tell stories like that about her. So thanks a bunch, Kris!" Jay teased, relieved when Kris smiled back at him. The way the guy as sweating, it was a wonder he wasn't sliding off the seat. "But this story..." Jay pointed to a tabloid on his desk. "Let's be honest. The story is very specific, which makes it more believable. This five thousand dollar business..."

"That." Kris sighed. "A stupid joke gone bad. Very very bad. This video is from the day after I met Adam at Starbucks."

 

_"Why did you put that kinda money into my account?" Kris demanded angrily, his voice a deep rasp as he flung himself past Hannah with a mumbled apology the minute she'd opened the door for him. "Five thousand dollars to meet him? I told you before. I'm not a whore!"_

_"I know, calm down--"_

_"Then why are you paying me?"_

_"Sit down, if you please." Geoffrey pointed to the chair and waited while Kris threw himself into it and gave Geoffrey what he thought might be the shirtiest look he'd seen in ages. He hid his smile. "Let's cut to the chase as you Yanks say. I put money into your bank account because you need it and that sum is inconsequential to me."_

_"I do not--"_

_"Don't lie to me, Kris Allen. You most certainly do need it. You need it for expenses -- for example, to move out of that hellhole of an apartment."_

_"My apartment is fine."_

_"For the rats who live with you, yes, it is fine. For actual human beings? Not very."_

_"There aren't any rats!"_

_"You have no furniture."_

_"I have a chair. It's clean. I cleaned it_ myself. _The orange mushrooms might have gotten a little... blurry over the years but it's a good chair. Sturdy. Comfy. I found it in the trash and cleaned it up, tightened the screws on it and it's good as new. It serves me well. It might be old and not very pretty and someone else might have thrown it away, but it's mine."_

 _"That's your_ Coat of Many Colors _?" Geoffrey asked._

_"Dolly Parton?" Kris shook his head. "I don't do country."_

_"No. But that chair means more to you than a place to put your arse. You could probably find some lyrics that would resonate with others."_

_"Oh. You think?" Kris bent forward. He knew Geoffrey Brush was the best in the business, so if he was giving out free advice, Kris was going to listen. "If I teased out an idea about one man's trash is another man's treasure and..."_

_"Yes, like that." Geoffrey smiled. Kris' idiot father might have thrown him out, but Geoffrey was happy to be... Well. Someday. Bloody hell, he should have never let Teresa go. They could have a had a son of their own of Kris' age by now. "Listen. I gave you money for a few reasons. Keep the bloody chair if you want. It's not about the chair! It's about independence. I know independence is important to you. I agree. It was dependence and the dysfunctional power dynamics that resulted that ruined my marriage."_

_"To Teresa?" Kris asked, having had more than one conversation about 'the woman who got away.' "You should just call her up, try again."_

_"What if she rejects me?"_

_"Then at least you'll know." Kris nodded. "Won't that be better than wondering?"_

_"I'll think about it. But I want you to take that money so that you -- and Adam -- will know you're with him because you want to be with him. Not because it's easier to live with him or because of an economic incentive. But because you love him. Because you don't want to live without him. Because you need him, not his money." Geoffrey paused. "And he needs honesty."_

_"You want me to tell him?"_

_"Yes, I want you to tell him I pay you five thousand dollars every time you give him a blowjob."_

_Kris' mouth dropped open, then realizing Geoffrey was teasing in his dry British way, he shrugged. "Well, then you're gonna owe me a lot more money over time."_

_The two men stared at each other, then began giggling._

_Hannah popped her head in the door. "You are both fools." She popped back out._

_Kris wiped his eyes as their laughter faded and they sat there grinning at each other. He liked Geoffrey, really liked him. He was a cool guy, real nice, caring even. He felt a... kinship with him, more than he'd ever felt with his own father, if he was honest. So maybe Geoffrey felt the same way about him and there really was no insult intended. Just someone being nice. And wasn't it interesting that this stranger was kinder than the Christians back in the church in Conway? Christian is as Christian does, he'd read somewhere once. It was true. God's grace was found in actions, not in words._

_"Seriously, Kris, two more points."_

_"Two more? Do you always lay everything out like a battle plan?"_

_"YES!" Hannah called from the other room._

_"And that's why I win!" Geoffrey called back. "The battle plan comes after I go with my gut. First, my bet is Adam's going to take you to a nice restaurant and to an upscale club sooner rather than later. You're going to require money to buy a jacket and shirt and at least a decent pair of jeans or slacks. By which I mean something remotely designer. Unless you want to admit to him that you can't go because you don't have the clothes. If you're comfortable with that..." Geoffrey shrugged as Kris winced. "I have a feeling your pride might get in the way of furthering the relationship and pride isn't going to keep you warm at night, as they say."_

_"Oh crap. There's gonna be a dress code?" Kris asked, ignoring the comment about pride so he could think about it later. Excessive pride was a sin for a good reason._

_"Yes. Ask around about nice restaurants. The most important clothing item is the jacket, for the record," Geoffrey suggested. Seeing that Kris still had a stubborn clench to his jaw, he continued, "Keep the money. Do what you want with it, but be forewarned -- I'm not taking it back. And here's my second point. A personal one for you alone. You may not want that money today, but it's a safety net so you won't have to be hungry. You don't have to touch the money right now. Save it. Save it in case you want to give Adam some amazing gift. If you want to fund your own cd someday. If you want to take a vacation. Give it to charity. Go on a mission trip with it. Buy instruments for inner city schools. Or save it for a rainy day. But it's a guarantee for you. For your independence in case you need it. Like a trust fund."_

_"A trust fund?"_

_"Yes, like a father would set up for his son. If..." Geoffrey hesitated, then added, "If you'd be... interested."_

_"Oh. Oh!" Kris flushed with pleasure. "Geoffrey, I... Thank you. I don't need it, but... I appreciate the idea. And the relationship." He grinned, eager to avoid more talk of his hunger and pitiful clothing. "So. Five thou a blowjob, huh?"_

 

Kris heaved out a long breath and focused on Jay, the way Adam had told him to do all those years ago. "So that's...uh...it. That became this stupid joke..."

"What my wife calls stupid men tricks?"

"Yeah. A joke between guys. And ever' so often, Geoffrey would make deposits into that account and he'd always make that joke in his text telling me about the deposit. So if you didn't know what it was about, you'd think I was bein' paid to...uh..." Kris rubbed the back of his neck. 

"So this so-called former associate who sold the story based upon what he stole from your phone, didn't know the story because why would he? It was a secret."

"Exactly." Kris nodded eagerly. "And what he left out -- conveniently -- is how I spent the stupid money. Stupid stupid money."

"Having seen that vintage jalopy you used to drive before Adam browbeat you into taking his last car, I know you didn't spend it on fast cars. Or fast women."

"Nah. I spent it on a birthday party and a vacation and basically stuff for our life together, so I felt like I was a partner, ya know?" Holding his hands palm up, Kris continued, "Geoffrey was right. It's really hard to not contribute your fair share and that money gave me some pride." He shook his head. "But then I had too much pride, then too much guilt to explain. Big mistake. But I wasn't bein' paid to be a whore or an actor or anything like that. I wasn't playin'a part. And the money was a gift and that's how I used it. And I'm deeply sorry that my pride and my fear of conflict meant I committed the sin of omission about this deal Geoffrey and I had. I love Adam."

"Well, I want to wish you two continued happiness," Jay finished. Turning to the camera, he added, "Up next is the comedian Gallagher, back on tour splitting watermelons!"

 

"Well?" Leila asked, turning to take the sword away from Adam's rolling but increasingly tight grip. She held his hand and look into his face. "What do you think? Or more to the point, what are you feeling?"

"Overwhelmed." Adam winced as his phone began beeping and picked it up, then turned it off. He needed to think, not hear what others were saying.

Nodding as she saw the mixture of hope and confusion and anger in Adam's eyes, Leila suggested. "I think we need a drink. I'll get it." 

"Just gimme the bottle." Adam got up with his mother and followed her into the kitchen, pacing back and forth while his mother -- who was clearly a saint -- began to make margaritas.

"So..." Leila reached for the ice. "To start with, I still can't believe Kris went on Leno." 

"He's so private..." Adam stopped. Kris was private.

"Kris is indeed private."

"Which means he's not a publicity whore. I already knew that."

"What else do you know?"

"I hate your mom-as-therapist voice."

"Would you rather I yelled?"

"At least then I could yell back."

"You honestly think you should yell at me? Ever?" Leila asked sternly, pushing the lid down on the blender.

"Mommmm...." Adam whined while the blender whirred to life.

"Don't whine."

"Then how about I yell?"

Hiding her smile and relief at the return of Adam's sense of humor, Leila shook her head. "How about you tell me what else you know about Kris?"

"Why don't you tell me what _you_ know about Kris?" Adam prevaricated. "You never said."

"What I think is that Kris... well, I think he made a bad mistake. Very bad. But I also think the origins of that bad mistake are what led you two to meet, so it more than evens out, in my opinion. Not that I'll ever tell Geoffrey that. I'll let him continue to think I'll never forgive him for his interference."

Adam counted his steps as he paced in front of his mother. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 turn around and begin again. 

"You look like a hamster in a wheel. Stop spinning and move forward," Leila urged. "Name your feelings. Why were you so quick to jump to the worst possible conclusions on New Year's Day?"

"What... I thought, all along, I was afraid it wasn't real. Too good to be true..." He paused as his mother poured the drinks and salted the rims. "And then...I remember when we were first going out, he'd occasionally have these little moments, when he was prickly or had an odd reaction... that made me anxious, but I didn't realize it until right now..."

"Like when? Maybe that's why you leaped so fast on New Year's Day."

"Maybe. And when? When he told me the story about the asshole at the Olive Garden? I made a crack about not whoring yourself out for a plate of cheap pasta and he got this odd look on his face." Adam grimaced. "I wondered then if he'd been so poor and so desperate that he'd actually done it and was too ashamed to admit it."

"What did you feel when you thought that?"

"Okay, Therapist Lambert," Adam teased. "I thought, I felt bad for him that he might have been that desperate. But that's different than what he did to me. Because a prostitute and a john _both_ know what their relationship is. I was the one kept in the dark in this relationship." 

"You're right," Leila admitted. If only Kris had been the one to confess what he'd done. Damn it, Kris. He'd been so afraid of being rejected, that he'd set himself up for rejection. "But I know he loves you. I remember how upset he was when he talked to Dani and Lane and me about intervening because you were working too hard." 

"Humph." Adam took a long drink and decided on one last try. "Maybe he wanted to make sure I kept being productive. I needed that vacation to keep from getting burnt out. After all, if I screwed up, then the income flow decreases."

"Yes, because Kris was a high maintenance sort of man who needed huge income flow to be happy."

"Now you're mocking me because we both know Kris isn't anything of the sort. That damn chair of his..."

"Then why did you say that about the income flow?" Leila held up her hand. 

"To be difficult." Adam took another sip. "But you know, he did act. That time in the restaurant. He -- and Geoffrey -- did act like they had only a passing and forgotten meeting."

"That's true. And he owes you an apology for that lie, which I suppose does fall under his sin of omission business. But let's bottom line this. It's gone on long enough and Kris just shot a cannonball over your bow. Kris not only loves you, he's besotted with you. That's the only explanation for him going on Leno. With videos!"

"Geoffrey and his damn control freakiness." 

"But what can you deduce from what you saw? When you eliminate the impossible, it has to be the improbable." 

"Yes, Sherlock. Damn, I still can't believe Kris went on there and told his story."

Leila nodded and watched Adam finish his drink and take his glass over to the sink. 

Slowly turning the water on, Adam tilted the margarita glass into the stream of water, rotating it slowly, watching the remaining glittering granules of salt dissolve like tears washed away with clean water. "Kris hates people baring their souls in public. Well, except for through music. Then he has no fear."

"Fear is a powerful motivator, though, isn't it?" Leila asked watching Adam wash and re-wash the glass. "That's why Kris didn't tell you." 

"He was afraid I'd get angry. And throw him out." Adam sighed, then slammed the glass down on the counter. "Which I wouldn't have done, if _he_ had told me before! I would have never seen that evidence which was damning, damn it! And if I wasn't afraid I wouldn't have leaped to conclusions and I would have never thrown him out and why didn't he fight back, Mom? When I threw him out because I was afraid and that kind of surprise was going to freak me the fuck out and if he'd told me, I would have _never_ thrown him out -- "

"Ah. That's an important truth." Leila froze as she saw a spasm of pain cross Adam's face, followed by guilt. "Adam?"

"I... oh god, I did to him just what his parents did. I threw him out. Oh god, oh god..." Adam moaned and covered his face. "What did I do? How could I have done that? How do I fix it?"

Leila heaved a relieved sigh and rushed over to wrap her arms around Adam as he began crying softly. These tears were good, cleansing. 

 

Wiping his forehead of sweat, Kris took a long drink from the bottle of beer in front of him. "There's not enough alcohol to blunt that pain. God, I can't believe I did that."

Teresa got up and patted Kris' shoulder. "That interview had to make an impression. Geoffrey's phone hasn't stopped ringing."

"There's really only one call I want," Kris said, his hand clenched so hard around his phone that it began to cramp. He stared in bemusement as Teresa reached down and gently prised his fingers off the phone and set it on the couch.

 

Pushing Adam down into a kitchen chair, Leila handed him a paper towel and told him to wipe his face. "And baby. Don't make a bad mistake of your own out of pride. It's time."

"A man needs some pride, Mom," Adam whispered, but even he heard how half-hearted was his protest... why the hell bother? He shook his head. "Ack. There'ss stubborn and then there's stupid."

"I know," Leila agreed with a smile as she saw the realization on Adam's face that it was time to move past that. "You need your pride, but you also need love. You should find a way to fulfill both needs. They're not diametrically opposed."

"I need to move..." Adam jumped up, whirled around and headed for the living room.

"If you're leaving, don't forget your sword!" Leila called out.

"Why? Am I storming a castle?" Adam took the sword from his mother's hand. "That doesn't sound like fun."

"Nice _Princess Bride_ reference, sweetie." Leila leaned back and watched Adam stalk around the room. Adam had that white knight syndrome. He actually would enjoy storming a castle. Then again, so would Kris. And maybe... Adam needed to be stormed. He'd enjoyed it how Kris had been the one to pursue him the first time. Maybe he needed it a second time, a do-over of his own and... she looked at the tv where some fool was splitting a watermelon. Oh. Kris. She shook her head. That boy did know Adam. 

"But speaking of needing a sword..." Adam frowned as he looked at the little piece of worthless plastic, that wasn't so worthless. Things were often, it seemed, not what they appeared. "I need to send a text."

 

**Ring**

**Rinnngg**

"Is it... It's Adam. A text." Kris pointed at his phone as it played the notes for Adam's song, "Thirty-Eight Cents".

"Well, pick it up!" Teresa ordered.

"What?" Geoffrey raced around the corner. "Is it Adam?"

"Yes, but I --" Kris closed his eyes. "Okay. Here goes..." He picked up the phone and stared at it.

"Well?" Geoffrey asked a moment later. "What does it say?"

"That you're the nosiest man on the face of the earth?" Teresa said with a sigh. When Kris stayed silent, just staring at his phone, she sighed again. "Well? Are you going to tell us?"

"He asked me if I vomited." Kris grinned.

"He _what_?" Geoffrey and Teresa echoed. 

"What does that mean?" Geoffrey continued. "Is that a secret code for something? You should ask him-- Ow!"

Teresa blandly returned Geoffrey's shocked gaze and withdrew her pinching fingers from the back of his arm. "Let the boy respond back to Adam!"

Kris turned his phone around to show them the text.

A: Did you vomit? Say hi to your mom for me.

 

"Adam." Leila shook her head. "After all this... you ask him if he _vomited?_ "

"Humph. You're eavesdropping." Adam sniffed. "It's a perfectly valid and salient question for Kris. He'll know I still love him because I asked. It will make him laugh, which is a good thing. _Plus_ I also mentioned his mom because it shows we're still a family. Perfect combo."

"I don't get you two sometimes."

 

"He loves me." Kris laughed, then bent back over his phone. He laughed again, feeling free from worry for the first time in weeks. 

"You got that from a question about vomit?" Teresa asked, looking at Geoffrey.

"He also talked about my mom. That means we're still a family. So he loves me and we're a family. We're good again." Kris grinned and felt relief relax his muscles. He slumped back against the back cushions of the couch. 

"It's like a secret code," Teresa suggested.

"These boys can be odd," Geoffrey agreed.

"It's not odd," Kris retorted. "He knows how I am about stuff like that and is asking if I'm okay. If he didn't care, he wouldn't have asked."

**Rinnnggg**

"Another one?" Geoffrey asked as Adam's ringtone rang again and Kris bent over his phone.

A: Thank you so much for tonight. I know it was hard for you. My head is clear now, but how much beer did you drink while waching? Seriously, are you okay?  
K: Yes, sorry, I didnt answer. Geoffrey was grilling me about what you said but Teresa made him shut up. Im okay. But speaking of sorry, I am. You heard that right? Clear?  
A: I know. I heard. And Im sorry too. Very. Very. I let my anger and fear win. Im sorry. Im sorry I didnt listen to you, Im sorry for what I said and I cant even say how sorry I am that I threw you out. Can you forgive me?  
K: Yes, yes. Thanks. Do you want to just call me?  
A: Not yet. I want to be in control and I have so many feelings right now. Im overwhelmed. If I hear your voice Im not going to be able to think clearly. My mind was in a fog or something for weeks and weeks and it feels clearer now than it has since New Years, but Im still shaky. Overwhelmed.  
K: Sweetie. I wish I could hold you.  
A: Ill be okay. Just need to get in control.  
K: Control freak.  
A: Yeah and the time I lost it, I screwed everything up. Im so sorry.  
K: I forgive you. We can talk about that in person because I want to see your face. But the whole mess started because I was afraid. Didnt fight back bec I was afraid. Fear is... bad. Probably cant say sorry enough.   
A: I think you showed me by going on Leno and talking about yourself. I know it was a sacrifice. I apprecite it.  
K: Im glad. Jacob said it would kill two birds with one stone. Tell you the truth to you AND make everyone know Im not a whore and you werent what you thought you were. But I set it up myself with Jay's mechanic. I picked out the vids too.  
A: Jacob occasionally has good ideas. But you executed it perfectly.  
K: What do we do now? Spend time alone? I know an island...  
A: Good idea, but I think we need a fresh start. Like that do over you talked abut to Jay  
K: Oh  
A: Is that a bad idea? I just want to do it properly this time  
K: Properly? LOL Is this Jane Austen  
A: How do you know Jane Austen  
K: Teresa made me watch all the movies with her :(  
A: Poor Kirs ;)  
K: And I miss  
A: Yessssssssssss?  
K: My chair  
A: Well. Clearly I was doing something majorly wrong for a long time if youre missing your ugleee chair so a do over is necessary  
K: Dont pout. Im also missing touching you, kissing you, licking you up like cake batter from a bowl  
A: Ice cream is better. But the chocolate chips can hurt, get in the wrong places  
K: I remember. Like glitter. LOL  
A: Are we sexting now? Cause my mom is sitting next to me and she just got out the spoon to hit me with but ill deal with the spoon for sexting or hey we coudl use the spoon... Poor mom.   
K: Is she freaking about you doing something freaky with her spoon  
A: Yeah. Good times. So. The sexting?  
K: I am never doing anything with this phone again that some asshole could see and use against us  
A: Good pont  
K: Pont?  
A: POINT Whatevs! So. No sexting  
K: No. Do over. We didnt have sex in the beginning. Your choice, remember?  
A: Damn. I was soooo stupid.  
K: Nah I win that prize. If I could go back in time and tell my self to tell you...  
A: Move forward, hedgehog  
K: I miss you calling me that too. But youre right. We need to move forward. Do it better. You know that do over is a good idea  
A: It is?  
K: Yes. I want a second chance. Do it right this time.  
A: Me too.  
K: Besides I had this whole plan to storm your castle I want to use  
A: You did?  
K: Yessireebob  
A: Weird. My mom and I were talking about storming YOUR castle.  
K: Nah. Im too small to be a castle. Id be a... I dunno. Whats in a castle yard? I know. The shop where they make swords. Lots of pointy points. You know pont with an i.  
A: Very funny. You should be careful because I have your chair. And your sword. The little green one. I can hold them hostage.   
K: Thank god. I was worried it had gotten lost. The sword. I have a thing about that little sword.  
A: And the chair. I have the sword in my hand  
K: How can you text with a sword in your hand  
A: I can multitask. ;)  
K: Did your mom just ask if that was sexting  
A: You betcha. I think Im gonna get hit with the spoon. So. You have a plan? That means youre ahead of me. Howm I going to parry your thrusts?  
K: LOL I know your mom just hit you with a spoon  
A: No she's laughing too hard.   
K: Geoffrey keeps trying to peek, but Teresa is trying to distract him  
A: Im glad you are with your family now. Then again, you could have stayed with my mom. I think she likes you better than me.  
K: I know youre pouting and I wish I was there to kiss it away  
A: Me too. So your plan? Any hints?  
K: Hmm. Let's see. What could I tell you.... I know. Look up.  
A: What does that mean?  
K: Its a hint. Not giving away the whole farm.  
A: So look up.  
K: Thats what I said.  
A: Okay, hedgehog. LOL Youre so easy to get all prickly.  
K: Speaking of pricks  
A: No sexting.   
K: You suck all the fun out of it.  
A: Sucking? Tsk. My mom is here. Have some decorum. Besides, the no sexting was your idea, you little tease.  
K: Decorum? Seriously, dude. You shouldve been the one watching Jane Austen with Teresa. You want the do over and you were the one who didnt want to have sex at the beginning before.  
A: But I am going to break a do over rule  
K: We have rules  
A: Yes, so I can break them.  
K: Okaaaaay, so which rule you going to break?  
A: The rule about redoing the timeline. Last time we had sex before we said the important stuff. This time, Im gonna be old fashioned and do it the other way.   
K: Okay. Go.  
A: I love you, Kris. I love you. Even when I thought you broke my heart, I couldnt stop loving you. I think my heart knew best and my heart is telling me to break this rule so you can know. I love you.  
K: I Thanks Oh forget it. I don't have anything eloquent. I just love you too. You know I never stopped. I loved you from the first moment and I'll love you to the last.  
A: That sounded amazingly eloquent to me.  
K: You inspire me. As you'll see when you look up tomorrow. I love you. Now, good night, sweetie. I know its your turn this week to bring Emmaline to preschool tomorrow at the crack of dawn.  
A: I love you. Good night to you too.   
K: I love you more.  
A: I'm bigger so I have more love.  
K: Wait. You didnt say you forgive me.  
A: Of course I do. If I didnt, I wouldnt have called. I had already started to forgive you. I didnt expect to, tbh. And then I surprised myself bec I started to laugh remembering things youd done but tonight was what pushed me over that edge. Thank you for taking that chance.   
K: The best things I ever got in life are from taking risks. Like tomorrow. On your way back from pre-school, look up. 

 

_The next morning:_

"Oh hell!" Adam slammed on his brakes.

Lane braced her hand on the dash and yelped. "Bloody hell!"

"Look up!" Adam yelled. "Look up!"

"Oh. My. God." Lane gaped as they both ignored the sound of screeching brakes and honking horns behind them to stare upward.

The billboard above them on Sunset Boulevard was white with bright purple lettering, glittering in the bright sunlight. It was simple in design, but eye-catching.

"I think the whole billboard sparkles!" Lane exclaimed, then began to laugh.

"It's... amazing," Adam admitted. "Hence the slam on the brakes."

"Which had nothing to do with the words?" Lane asked with a smile.

ADAM:   
I LOVE YOU.  
I'LL EVEN WEAR GLITTER MYSELF TO MAKE IT UP TO YOU.  
THAT'S HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.  
CALL ME.   
LOVE, KRIS

"He...had glitter put around the letters..." Adam whispered.

"A sign of true love, indeed. To say nothing of the offer to put it on himself?" Lane asked. Kris really knew the way to Adam's heart.

"Don't be silly!" Adam scoffed, then turned his head away from Lane.

"Okay. Are you going to put the car in drive and move along before we cause an accident?"

"That I can do." Adam handed his phone to Lane. "Do me a favor and send a text to Kris?"

**Rinngg**

A: I'm calling. So. Nice billboard. Except for one thing. Needs more glitter.

"Lane sent that text for him because there's no misspellings, but okay, fine!" Kris grumbled with a grin. "He wants more glitter. He's gonna get it. All over the place."

 

 _That night_ :

"Tonight on E! News..." Ryan smiled at the camera, anticipating the exclusive he'd be getting soon. He'd better be getting it. "In the apparently on-going saga or dare I say, romance? Of Adam Lambert and Kris Allen, another chapter was written today."

Giuliana nodded with a smile. "As most of you know, last night Kris Allen visited The Tonight Show and spilled all about how Lambert's manager, Geoffrey Brush, actually set him up to meet Lambert, acting as a matchmaker. After watching Kris and his videos, all I can think is that the whole story was actually so cute!" 

"I had a feeling you'd say that Giuliana. You're a sucker for romance. And if Adam's a sucker for romance -- and I have a sneaking suspicion he _is_..." Ryan said slowly, then sped up again. "He probably loved the billboard Allen took out near Santa Monica Boulevard. It made clear once again just what he's willing to do to make it up to Adam that he was careless with his phone and someone stole it only to sell stories based upon an incomplete grasp of the facts."

"Problem is that if Kris keeps pulling these romantic gestures, Adam has no incentive to say he's forgiven him."

"Oh, I don't know about that." Ryan smirked. "We've seen the two of them together."

"True, true, Ryan. Even after all these years, they can't keep their hands off each other." Giuliana sighed. "So romantic. Well, the only reason I'd be resisting is to see what he'd do next!" 

 

_The next morning:_

"Why you coming with us this morning, UncaBrad?" Emmaline asked from her car seat.

"I'm dying to see this billboard your Daddy Kris made up for Daddy Adam. I hear it has purple glitter." Brad grinned as Adam pulled a U-Turn in the middle of the block so they could all see the billboard. Adam was the one dying to see it again.

"Where is it?" Emmaline asked, craning her neck, looking up.

"There it is!" Brad laughed as Adam slowed the car to a crawl to look at the billboard. 

"Oh wow. It's a new one," Adam said in surprise. Billboards were expensive. What the hell was Kris doing?

"I always knew I liked that boy. What a tease, what a little c--"

"Little pitchers," Adam warned, although his voice was warm with laughter as he looked up too. The billboard had a photograph of a man's hand with a smear of blue glitter on the index finger and the line, "I TOLD YOU I'D PUT GLITTER ON MYSELF. STEP ONE..." across the top. Adam laughed. "So that's where his glitter is..."

Brad grinned. "Waste of perfectly good edible glitter. Is that _his_ hand?"

"Yeah."

"How can you tell?"

"There's a scar on the palm from one time he was making dinner and having a fight with his father at the same time and got distracted."

"Coke Man!" Emmaline cried out. "Dadakiss got very puffed up when he used to talk to Coke Man."

"He did," Adam agreed, then pointed up at the billboard. "And see the calluses on his fingertips? That's Kris." He grinned as he pressed down on the pedal. "It's high res. Lee must've taken the picture." 

"There's no picture of his face on it. Boring." Emmaline shrugged and swung her feet back and forth, kicking the back of her father's seat as they drew closer to pre-school. She didn't want to go today. She just knew the big boys in the front seats were going to have fun without her. Like going shopping and UncaBrad had said something about feathers. She wanted feathers. "Just his hand." She kicked again.

"Emmaline, _stop_ that right _now_!" Adam said sternly. "It's annoying and distracting. I need to concentrate on my driving." He sucked back a string of curses as he saw what awaited them. He really needed to learn a new language so he could curse in it in front of Emmaline. Or at least learn curse words in other languages. That'd be useful. 

"No kidding," Brad muttered, whistling under his breath as Adam swung Dani's SUV into the pre-school parking lot. "You came awfully close to that one pap."

"I get double points for a pap at my daughter's pre-school. Maybe triple," Adam grumbled darkly as he parked the car. He looked over at Brad, who was grimacing. "I'll get Emmaline out and you come around to help shield her."

"Maybe I should hold her and you can use your bigger size to kind of cover us both?" Brad asked as he hopped out while Adam opened his door and reached for Emmaline's. He winced as the shouts from the paps reached them just as Adam put Emmaline down on the ground to grab her schoolbag. 

"Where's Kris?"  
"Are you going to take the loser back?"  
"Did you see him on Leno?"  
"Is he coming home?"  
"How'd it feel to find out he was paid to meet you?"  
"Are you going to let him near your daughter again?"  
"How do you feel about the fact that he did take money-"

The cacophony of noise shocked Brad and he stepped back as Adam looked up with a glare as he heard the content of some of the comments. In that second's hesitation, Emmaline darted away towards the paps on the sidewalk, going up to the loudest one and kicking him hard in the shins. "Youse shut up! I don't mean that in a nice ways, either! You bad bad men. Not nice!"

"I'm going to sue!" The pap shrieked, holding his shin, then falling to the ground. He rolled around, screaming.

"What's wrong with him?" Emmaline stared at him, with her hands on her hips. "Toughen up, mister!"

"No kidding." Brad rolled his eyes and picked up Emmaline. 

"I'll sue!" The man screamed. "It's on tape! I'll sue."

Adam grinned. "Go ahead. I'll be happy to testify in court how my three year old little girl took down a guy that weighs nearly three hundred pounds. My daughter, a pint-sized warrior in a pink dress."

"And purple barrette. My contribution, make it clear, okay?" Brad asked the paps.

"Hey!" The pap on the ground snapped back as he lumbered to his feet. "We're just reporting the news and the news is that your boyfriend is nothing more than a--" 

Emmaline pointed her finger at him. Everyone laughed as the pap backed up. "Listen! My Dadakiss is just in a time out! He'll be home soon -- Ugh, Dadam! " She protested as Adam put his arm around the two of them and hustled them away. "What is the _matter_ with them?"

"They are putzes."

"Putzes. Putzes," Emmaline said slowly, sounding the word out. "Putzes. Didn't their mommies and daddies put them in a time out when they were bad so they would learn how to be good? Or use that Lava soap on their mouths?"

"Apparently not. That's what comes of piss-poor parenting without consequences," Adam said with a smirk in the direction of the paparazzi.

"What's a con...se...quences?"

"What will happen to you when we get home for running away from me like that."

"Uh-oh." Emmaline sighed. "Time out on the naughty stool when we gets home."

"Absolutely." 

"I think those bad men need to have a big time out." Emmaline pouted. "It's no fair." 

 

 _That evening_ :

"That is so..." John shouted later that night, a string of curses leaving his mouth. "At a pre-school?! I know you warned us, but I still can't believe it."

"I'm glad Adam told me so I could be prepared," Kris agreed. He forced his fists to uncurl and took deep breaths. "I told him maybe we oughta leave the country for a while. Or at least have someone else bring Emmaline to school -- they only want me and him. But I never thought and Adam didn't either, that they'd go to a pre-school and yell shit while our daughter was there. A new low."

"I say tomorrow we all go down there and form a line inbetween Emmaline and those vultures!" Rick, the regular, offered.

"We could, but I dunno," Craig, another patron, argued. "Looks like the little girl can handle them just fine."

John nodded and began to smile. "She did. She's a toughie, our Emmaline."

"Yeah. She knocked a guy out who weighed about 10 times her size." Rick grinned and raised his glass. "Here's to tough little girls and the daddies who raise them."

Kris smiled and pointed towards the tv. "I'll give credit for that to Adam and Neil. They've raised her pretty tough."

Elbowing Kris in the ribs, John noted, "I think you can get some credit too. They may toss her around physically, but she's seen you stand up for yourself too. Adam doesn't call you hedgehog for nothing. And you've learned how to stand up to your father -- which she saw. Good lessons."

"I'm working on getting tougher still." Kris smiled. "And nobody's gonna push her around. Thank god."

"I liked how she said you were in a time out," John noted with a grin as he uncapped a bottle of beer for Craig and handed it to him. "Good call."

"I was in a time out?" Kris asked, staring at the tv and considering Emmaline's analysis of the situation. Adam had said in that text that he had never fallen out of love with him and while Lane and Leila had brought his clothes over, his chair was still there. So maybe, unconsciously, Adam had never meant for him to be gone for good. "I was in a time out. That... actually makes sense, if you think about it."

John laughed. "So do you have to sit in the corner or do you have a naughty step you're supposed to be sitting on?"

"The naughty stool is back at the house. Can't wait to use it again. If you know what I mean..." Kris wiggled his eyebrows, then smacked his own butt.

Craig choked on his beer, then they all began to laugh. Wiping his mouth, he asked, "Don't you have visitation rights to the stool? And that damn chair of yours?"

"You're right!" Kris nodded and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He always knew where his phone was these days. He quickly began typing.

K: I believe I have visitation rights to my chair. And green sword.  
A: Per the terms of the do over, you do not.

"Ha! That's what he thinks. I'll make my own rules!" Kris grinned as he turned his phone off and put it back in his pocket, automatically patting to make sure it was in place.

"Hey, why are you two texting instead of talking?" John asked.

Looking up, Kris paused. He wasn't going to tell the other reasons Adam had given him Monday night, his need for control. That was private. But he could give the reasons Adam had given him late last night. "Adam says if he hears my voice, he's not going to be able to wait to do this do over. And it's super important to him. Whatever he's planning."

"You're blushing," Rick observed.

"He can't resist you," John teased. "See? You never had anything to worry about. He was gonna come around. Just needed time to clear his head. You needed to have faith."

Kris touched his cheek. It was warm. He rotated his shoulders to loosen them up. "Hey, shouldn't we be talking about sports? The basketball game is on--"

"Awww. Adam's sweet on Krissy..." Craig said in a sing song. "Adam and Krissy kissin' in a tree..."

"What, are you six years old?" John asked. He turned to Kris. "Forget basketball. Your love life is way more interesting."

"My god, you guys are gossips just as bad as the coffee hour church ladies!" Kris exclaimed.

Rick smiled. "So what's going on with this do over that's taking Adam a while to finish up?" 

"I dunno and it's drivin' me nuts!"

"Well, Adam is creative..." John agreed. "So who knows. But it has something to do with this do over idea? What situation from your past is he re-doing? Oh wait, I know. He's finally taking the opportunity he missed when we painted your apartment to get rid of that damn chair."

"He wouldn't!" Kris protested. He wiped the counter clean over and over. But Adam was going to do something with that chair. He knew it. 

 

 _Still that evening_ :

"Can I just say?" Brad complained as he pushed the chair into position in the front driveway. "That I am exceedingly aggravated that my contribution to your outfit has not been mentioned by any of the entertainment so-called news outlets even though I _specifically_ asked those paps to do so? Hon _est_ ly. Life is in the details!"

Emmaline shook her head as she drew on the driveway with chalk with Neil. "Mama says you can't trust the paps people, UncaBrad."

"Moms know best." Brad nodded. "Now where's your father? Adam, I mean."

Neil pointed towards the house. "He's inside. Haranguing someone to hurry up. Out in a sec." 

Dani smiled as she came over to the dumpster and looked from it to where Lee stood with his camera. Lowering her voice so that only Brad could hear, she whispered, "He's on the phone with the jeweler."

"Isn't it enough that he had a dumpster brought in just to take a picture?" Brad asked. "Now the plaid boy gets jewelry too?" 

"Kris is going to love this. Well, I mean hate it. But you know what I mean," Adam said with a grin as he came out. 

Neil stood up and climbed into the dumpster with a grunt. "C'mon, Brad. Get in here."

"Why is it that you call me to do dumpster diving?" Brad complained as Adam gave him a boost and nearly flung him inside. 

"You went shopping today with Dadam and I didn't," Emmaline pointed out, drawing lopsided circles.

Brad smiled. "Your Dadam needed my sartorial advice for his trip. I mean, he needed my advice to buy clothes."

"You just tell him to get purple every time." Emmaline picked up a purple chalk. "I bet you even told him his feathers should be purple." 

"She's right!" Neil agreed with a laugh as he thought of what Adam had taken out of a large box earlier that night. "C'mon Adam, give us the chair. Let's put it where it belongs."

"Kris is going to have a heart attack as it is. Make sure you keep it up nice and high and keep it clean." Lifting the chair into the dumpster so that Neil and Brad could hold it up high enough to be seen over the top, Adam stepped back for Lee to take the pictures. They moved the chair this way and that, then took a break while Adam and Lee reviewed the images.

"Are we done yet?" Brad asked, poking his head up over the top. 

"You look good in there. I always knew you were trashy," Adam quipped with a grin.

"Hey, I could accidentally on purpose drop this ugly thing," Brad warned.

"Dadakiss would kill you," Emmaline said matter-of-factly. "Then no more purple."

 

_The next evening:_

"Last night we brought you footage of a disturbing video," Billy Bush began as the footage from the pre-school scene played behind him. "It involved some nasty name-calling, an assault and possible physical harm."

The blonde co-host looked solemn and then grinned. "Yes, folks. It was very disturbing. The paparazzi who staked out the _pre-school_ of Adam Lambert's daughter discovered that they had the _three_ year old to contend with."

"That girl knows how to handle herself!" Billy laughed. "Today, the plot thickened as Kris Allen unveiled yet another billboard -- this time with the glitter moving from his finger to his wrist. But more intriguingly, it was apparently Adam's turn to play this... I guess you'd call it courtship game, out in public with his _own_ billboard." Billy raised his hands, then pointed to another screen with a photograph of a billboard. "It took LA a while to ascertain that it was Adam Lambert who -- for the _first_ time -- made a public statement on the _messy_ scandal of the origins of his long-time love affair with Kris Allen. And a curious statement it was." 

The orange mushroom chair was precariously balanced near the top of a dumpster with large orange letters on the front of the dumpster that read,   
BRING IT ON, BABY  
I HAVE YOUR CHAIR  
BRING IT ON

"Now," Bush continued. "We don't know if there's a _personal_ meaning to this chair, but we have learned that Allen's been shopping his demo cd around with the working title of Orange Mushroom Chair. Now some people are speculating that this entire scandal was nothing more than a _publicity_ plan to get Allen a better record deal."

"In the interests of fairness," the blonde continued, as she hoped she'd be able to compete with Seacrest for whatever exclusive he was crowing about having. "We did contact Allen through the Geoffrey Brush agency, who expressed impatience at the notion." The blonde smiled and pointed to a screen with the captioning scrolling over it as Jacob's recorded voice spoke.

"That idea is utterly ridiculous. I can assure you that is _not_ how Kris Allen's mind works. He's only engaging in this behavior to make it up to Adam and to prove a point, a point he feels he has to make in public because the media irresponsibly jumped on a story without checking the facts first. Although as a pr person, I can appreciate the idea of turning a sow's ear into a silk purse, having seen that hideous chair in person, I don't think it's possible to turn it into a silk purse. Or a decent album cover. Get a grip, people."

 

Geoffrey shrugged as they walked out to the patio after watching the nightly entertainment news. "Well, Kris, the truth is that we've had two labels call with offers in the last few days."

Kris slumped as he sat down on a padded chair and watched the sun go down. "I guess I should've expected it. I think... I can't take those offers. No matter what we say, it'll look like I was capitalizing on this mess. And I won't have even a whisper of that. It would taint the music."

"I agree. I'd advise you to go the indie route. You and Adam could work on it together. Maybe overseas. Bring in outside producers as needed, but it could be your baby, you two."

"I... I want to. I think it will be a good project for us as a couple. We can probably work through a lot of our shit through music, ya know?"

"I'd bet you can." Geoffrey took a sip from his wineglass. "Adam asked me to clear his schedule except for a few performances to keep him in the public eye from time to time. I think he's finally taking everyone's advice to slow it down."

"Ha!" Kris scoffed. "We both know that's impossible. I'm wondering what he's up to, with this plan of his..." 

 

"Can't you hurry it up?" Adam asked impatiently. "I know. Sorry. I know I'm asking for a miracle, but... Three or four days? Thank you, thank you. I'll find a way to stretch it all out." 

 

_The next morning:_

 

"So did you see the billboard yet?" Dani asked, as she exited the pre-school, her phone cradled between her shoulder and cheek. They'd decided that she'd bring Emmaline to pre-school until this mess died over. When she'd gotten out of the SUV this morning, the paps had groaned in disappointment. Emmaline had grinned and begun to run towards them. She thought it was a game now and enjoyable enough that spending time on the kitchen naughty stool was worth it. 

"I just got your picture," Adam told her. "I think I see a theme. A disturbing one. The glitter's gone from his finger to his wrist and now? Today, the glitter was on his bicep. His _bare_ bicep. Which led to part of a bare _shoulder_."

"OMG!" Dani exclaimed as she bubbled over with laughter. "His arm is bare in public. He's not conforming to the Lambert Nunnery Dress Code."

"Did you just verbally capitalize those words?"

"You got it. I'm so glad you haven't lost your ability to parse out verbal inflections." 

"Well, you've lost the ability to parse out Kris' warped sense of humor. Or his ability to get me going. He's hinting that the glitter is going to go further up his arm."

"To what? His collarbone?" Dani laughed. "You are a tad possessive."

"He's mine."

"So claim him."

"I'm trying. The jeweler is taking forever, to say nothing of the hatmaker..." Adam growled.

"How does this fit into the do over?"

"I should've started dressing him from the beginning. Just think of a world without plaid. Or dirty sneakers..." Adam sighed. "But I wish they would hurry up. Because his god only knows what Kris is going to do next."

 

_Early that evening:_

 

"DADAMMMMMMMMM!" Emmaline shrieked the second she heard the interior door to the garage open. "HURRY UP!"

"What's going on?" Adam yelled back, nearly running in his hurry to get to the kitchen. "Is your mama okay? Is anyone bleeding? Did something flood? Are a pair of my boots ruined or--"

Emmaline grinned as she waved to Adam from her perch on top of the kitchen island. Waving a spoon in her hand, she shrieked again. "No, silly. We has ice cream!"

"Oh, for the love of..." Putting his hand over his heart, Adam took a breath. "Inside voice. You are only supposed to scream if there's danger, remember?"

"Okay." Emmaline smiled and kept waving her spoon around, waiting for her father to notice it.

He smiled and reached up to pluck Emmaline down from the island. "How many times have we told you not to climb on the island?"

"A lot." Emmaline shrugged and lightly tapped Adam on the nose with the spoon. "But you said not to do it around Dadakiss because he gets nervous. And he's not here. He left, so I coulds climb up then."

"He-- what?" Adam gaped at his daughter and twirled around to stare in the direction of the garage. "When?"

"Forever ago. I've been waiting forever!" 

"Dani!" Adam yelled.

Covering her ears, Emmaline complained. "Ow, Dadam. Inside voice?" 

"Inside voice, Adam." Dani agreed as she came into the kitchen. "And yes, Kris came over, I made him a sandwich -- because he looked like he could use one." She cocked her head and looked at Adam, who'd made a few worried comments over how thin Kris had looked on Leno.

"I... yes, he could," Adam agreed as he caught the smug look on Dani's face. "What about me? I could eat."

"We have ice cream!" Emmaline shrieked. "That's whats I was saying!"

"Inside voice?" Adam asked with a grin.

"Oops." Shrugging, Emmaline pointed towards the refrigerator. "Let's eat now! Dadakiss and Mama said we had to wait until you got home. You home now, so let's eat."

"What's so special about this ice cream?"

"It's for you. It's an ice cream cake!" Emmaline explained. "Dadakiss brought it for you. He said you have to eat it. It says you have to."

"I... Excuse me?"

As Dani pulled the cake from the freezer, Emmaline danced around excitedly. "Dadakiss likes dump cake better. But he got an ice cream cake for you because that's _your_ favorite."

Dani put the frozen three layer ice cream cake on the island and smiled as she watched Adam read the inscription.

I LOVE YOU  
EAT  
FOOD IS LOVE  
EAT ME

"That's..." Adam smiled. "Beautiful. Doing something for someone you love is beautiful."

"It is," Dani agreed, pausing as Adam picked up his phone and hit a speed dial number.

"Hi, Kim... Yes, yes, we're going to be fine... We're about to take a trip together actually...Yes the press are vultures."

"Bad bad men!" Emmaline called out. "Tell Grammy Kim that they are bad men and that bad men deserve a kick in the leg."

"She heard you and agrees," Adam told his daughter. 

"So does Grammy Weiwa. _They_ wouldn't make me sit on the naughty stool." Emmaline sighed. "When's we gonna eat the ice cream?"

"Wait quietly or no ice cream," Dani said sternly. "Practice your song in your head."

Emmaline whispered, "My head is very loud. Like Dadam's voice when he's singing in the shower."

"The reason I called, Kim-- " Adam interjected when Kim took a breath. "Was to get the recipe for dump cake. Can you please email it to me? Yes, I'm going to make it. Oh... I suppose. Yeah. we can Skype and you can walk me through it. That would be great. Tomorrow night ... Bye." Adam closed the phone and turned around. "Okay, the ice cream."

"It's your cake, so you get to cut it," Dani reminded Adam, handing him the knife she'd heated by running under hot water. "Now not too big because dinner will later."

"Falls under the heading that life's short, so eat dessert first?" Adam asked with a smile as he carefully pressed down to cut through the layers. All of his favorite flavors. My god, if he didn't already love Kris, this would have put him over the edge What a do over. "He is relentless..." he said under his breath. "I like it." 

"He's wooing you." Dani grabbed plates and held them as Adam finished cutting slender pieces. 

Smiling as Emmaline dug her spoon into her slice, Adam asked, "Is that what he told you?"

"Actually, Mr. Ego, we didn't talk about you at all. Well, except that he's worried you've lost weight."

"Pot meet kettle." Adam frowned as he thought of how wan and drawn Kris had looked on Leno. Not as skinny as when they'd first me -- and he really needed to thank Geoffrey for forcing that money on Kris -- but still thinner than he should be. He sat down himself and slowly began to eat his ice cream. Damn, it was good. 

"Agreed." Dani shrugged as she ate. Kris and Adam would both put the weight back on once they weren't pining for each other. And went on that trip. "He was here to spend time with Emmaline and we just talked about non-Adam stuff. Because there is a whole world out there that has nothing to do with Adam Lambert."

"I need to call Jacob. He's falling down on the job if there is that much to talk about that doesn't involve me. My plan for world domination is failing miserably."

"Eat your ice cream." Dani smiled. "Actually, I think he came over for visitation rights for his chair."

"That chair." Adam rolled his eyes. "He probably misses it more than he misses me."

"I doubt that. But..." Dani dragged it out. "It's a close second."

"I'm first!" Emmaline raised her spoon in the air. "But Dadakiss do love that chair. I thought he was goin' to cry when he saw it. Poor Dadakiss misses his chair. It's his lovey."

"Indeed it is," Adam agreed, wondering what had gone through Kris' mind when he'd seen that his precious chair was in its proper spot in their music room. 

"He left a note on the mushie chair," Emmaline told him. "He wanted to make sure it was okay, then he wrote you a note." 

"Whaaat?" Adam jumped up and ran down the hall.

Emmaline looked at her mother. "I thought we weren't supposed to run in the house?"

Dani sighed. "Dadam is an adult, so he doesn't have the same rules you do."

Emmaline nodded. "Right. That's why Dadakiss told me that my princess glitter from Disneyland is only for special 'casions but he and Dadam can play with their glitter any time they want."

"When did he tell you that?" Dani asked, trying to keep from laughing. Kris and his sexual fetish about seeing Adam in glitter.

"Today. When he was playing with his chair." Emmaline giggled. "We should go see what Dadam thinks about the chair."

"We should." 

Adam smiled as he saw the bright orange note paper with Kris' messy scrawl on it.

_I hope we'll be back in this room making music together soon. By which I mean actual music because I've decided I want us to make my cd together. Mostly in this room. Where we'll also have lots of sex. On this chair. We may find glitter in odd places, though. Can this do over be over? I miss my chair. And you too, of course. K_

"What game you and Dadakiss playing anyway?" Emmaline asked as she watched her father carefully fold up the note and put it in his wallet.

"It's kind of like hide and seek." Adam began to laugh as he looked more closely and realized there were orange glints on the chair. "Only with more glitter."

"And the paps people."

 

 _The next day_ :

"Fuckityfuckfuck!" Adam exclaimed. "Why did Lane think going out in public again was a good idea?" 

"You have a way with the descriptive epithets. I mean, wow, what an amazingly varied vocabulary you have there." Neil grimaced as he saw why Adam was swearing as they neared the grocery store parking lot later that afternoon. Adam wanted the ingredients for some stupid cake. "We're about to be swarmed by paparazzi."

"One of these days..."

"Take a deep breath. And.."

"And what?"

"Remember that you have more money, better hair and most importantly.... a bigger dick than any of them."

Adam burst out laughing. "How would you know?"

"How would I know?" Neil winced. "I was in the other bedroom in that two bedroom suite in London, remember? Kris is rather vocal in his appreciation of your endowments."

"Hey, babe. It's not just what you've got, but what you do with it." Adam winked. "And yet, I've never heard any of your girlfriends talking about you like that. It's odd, isn't it? Same genetic material, same height, same build. And yet I'm the one who's been gifted--"

"Girls just don't talk like that."

"Ha!" Adam shook his head as he parked the car as close to the entrance as possible. "Women are way way dirtier than men when they talk."

"No way." Neil shook his head. 

"Way. See, straight guys don't really know how women are. But women tell their gay BFFs everything, the same way they tell their girlfriends everything. And, bro, I mean everything."

"Dani wouldn't--"

"Do not talk about Dani and sex at the same time. Your crush on her creeps me out. Like a lot."

"Too bad. I missed my chance with Lane--"

"Lane?" Adam looked over at Neil and saw the amusement in his eyes. "Oh, thank fuck, you're joking. The two of you would have been a nightmare. Besides, Cale and Lane were meant to be. There was a reason she went to Petticoat Junction and met him."

"Yeah, you sent her there to check out Kris." Neil rolled his eyes. "You and your destiny schtick."

"No, seriously. I wouldn't have sent her out there if I hadn't had those bad experiences before. So I was meant to get some good karma and I spread it around by sending Lane out there, who put up with Pearline and her snakes, but met Cale. See? It's the karmic balance. Plus look at their names. They both have A, L, and E in their names. There's only one letter difference and in numerology--"

"STOP!" Neil groaned. "You're making my brain hurt and..." He glanced at his brother and saw the amusement in his eyes this time. "Well, actuallllly..." he drawled. "If you look at my name and Dani's full name, we have a lot of letters in common, so it's clear that destiny is also on our side. I've decided. You and Kris are my inspiration. Life is too short not to go after the one you love. I'm going to ask her out."

"Over my dead body."

"Speaking of dead bodies, you ready to run the gauntlet?"

"No. But let's go." Adam opened the car door.

"I admire your courage." Neil smiled at his brother. 

"Just keep me from punching one of them."

"That's what I'm here for."

"You used a preposition on the end of the sentence."

"The spoken word doesn't have to be as grammatically correct as the written word."

"And in the case of the paps and tabloids, the written word doesn't have to resemble the truth." 

"So throw a few truths out there and see what happens." Neil nodded as he and Adam took off. 

"Are you going to forgive him?" The pap photographer screamed.  
"How did it feel to know your partner was a whore?"   
"Are you going to make him grovel?"  
"Are you going to press charges?"  
"Are you going to fire your manager?"  
"Are you going to send him on a scavenger hunt?"  
"Is it true he was paid five thousand a blowjob?"  
"Are you going to kiss and make up on that island?"  
"Are you going to make him wear glitter?"

Adam shook his head in exasperation and paused only long enough to say, "There are a few 'No' answers and a few 'Yes' answers to those questions. And there are a few 'Wow, that's a good idea' and a few 'What the hell is wrong with you people' answers. I'll let you speculate as to which questions get a no answer and which get a yes answer. Go ahead, use your imaginations. I'm sure you'd twist the truth anyway, so have at it."

 

_That evening:_

"Did he seriously just give them, like, a riddle?" John asked as he turned off the TMZ program.

"Me too, I think." Kris grinned. This game was actually pretty fun. 

Cale shook his head. "What the hell are you two doing? Communicating via paparazzi?"

"And billboard?" John added. "By the way, that was a lot of glitter."

"It's not real glitter, just a photograph of glitter," Kris explained.

"Oh well then! That's completely different." John rolled his eyes. 

"It is. Real glitter would flake off and get all over the place. And as much as Adam would love seeing glitter all over Santa Monica Boulevard -- probably a dream come true, in fact -- it's a safety hazard."

"You know this because you checked?" John surmised.

"Yeah. I had to be thorough." Kris grinned.

John sighed. "You know, Cale has a point. Why are you two communicating like this? Really?" He exchanged a look with Cale as Kris shook his head, then bent down.

Looking closely into the mirror behind the bar, Cale laughed. "I see that smile. You two are having fun with this, aren't you?"

John tilted his head to consider Kris' face. "Aha! You're right, Cale. The two of them are having fun... some sort of weird courtship thingee."

"They have a sick and twisted relationship," Cale observed. "Speaking of sick and twisted, how's that new piece of jewelry working out?"

Kris winced. "I hope Adam appreciates it---" He froze as the door opened. "What the hell?" 

"Is that Dusty?" Rick asked. "Nah -- it's..."

"Hey, runt." Neil grinned and pulled off Adam's cap and wig. "I'm incognito. Lane's pissed that I'm doing this instead of her."

"Doing what?" Kris asked, staring curiously at the rectangular cake pan in Neil's hands. At least his hands were carrying a cake pan. It could be worse. And this conversation was not going to go well.

"I come bearing gifts. If you can call a dump cake a gift, that is." 

"Cake?" Rick and John echoed. 

"Get out the knife and some plates!" Craig urged. "I like me some of that dump cake."

"Dump cake?" Kris repeated as Neil set it down on the bar. "What..."

"Adam made it with his own two hands."

"Oh, maybe I don't need any of those calories..." Rick murmured, stepping back. Adam's inability in the kitchen was the stuff of many a Kris story. 

"And what did you do to it on the way over?" Kris asked, tentatively picking at the aluminum foil wrapped around the corner. "Hey!" He protested when Neil slapped his hand. 

"Not yet, runt."

"Don't call me that," Kris retorted automatically, then looked up. He hadn't heard a word from Neil this whole time and had no idea what he thought. "Then again, I guess that's the least of what you could call me."

"Runt is my loving nickname for you. Honestly, don't they teach anything in Arkansas schools other than how to make that pig holler?" Neil asked with a grin. 

This conversation, Kris thought in confusion, was actually almost normal. "I'm confused."

"Okay. I saw you on Leno." Neil explained, "Actually, I also saw the footage they cut including the part where you talked about how Adam should know you were for real because you threw potatoes at me because I was being an asshole." 

"Oh. I'm not gonna apologize for that. Then or now. You deserved it." 

"I didn't think you would. Nor, in my case, do I think you should. You were honest and damn it, right. I deserved those potatoes. Truth is... I went too far with the teasing. You were right to call me on it." Neil sighed heavily. "And I also know you weren't what it looked like you were. I said that to him almost from the second I stepped in that room on New Year's Day." 

"You can say the word. Whore. I can handle it. And .. Wow. You believed me from the beginning?" Kris asked in shock.

"I did". Neil paused, then went on. "I saw the way you looked at him when no one else was around. I saw the way you touched him, the way you kissed him. I saw how happy he was with you and that was for years. I know it was real. I know you were honest in your love for him." 

"Well, yeah, I was honest," Kris said in a rush. "I always have been. Except for the little matter--" "

"Yeah. That. Little matter. Five thou a blow job, huh?" Neil teased, then froze, belatedly realizing Kris might have a tender spot about that. He was relieved when Kris flushed, but then rolled his eyes. Good. "But time's wasting and I've got bigger fish to fry."

"Like what?" Rick asked.

"Who is that and why is he up in my business?" Neil asked, frowning.

"It's a neighborhood bar," John explained. "We're all up in each other's business." 

"Yeah, but no." Neil lowered his voice. "Anyway, here's the deal. I believed you about all of it. You were always a pain in my ass. That was real. And it would have been way easier for you to suck up to me, but instead you were a total asshole to me."

"You deserved it." 

"I know. But focus. The cake is in return for the ice cream cake. It meant a lot to him. Hence the slaving over an oven while your mother supervised via Skype."

"No way!" Kris began to laugh. "He really does love me. And didn't he have anything better to do?"

"He's... cleared his calendar for the foreseeable future," Neil prevaricated. "If only to enjoy seeing what you're going to do next."

"Really?"

"Yeah. It's a great riff on the do over. Not the same, but the same pursuit? Great idea. No one has ever chased him like this." 

"And he likes it?" Kris asked hopefully.

"He doesn't hate it."

Kris chuckled. "As good as it's gonna get from you, right?"

"Let me be clear. He loves it as much as he loves you. Which is a lot. I'll just say this -- If you ever hurt him again, I'll kick your ass all the way to that island the two you visited on vacation."

Kris froze. "Was that a hint?"

"An island might be involved."

"Which one?"

"If you want to find out..." Neil pulled back the aluminum foil covering the rectangular cake pan. "Start here."

"Coordinates. In icing..." Kris grinned and pulled out his phone to ascertain the location. 

 

 _Late that night_ :

"Lane?" Kris asked as Lane and Neil walked into the Starbucks. "Isn't Adam coming?"

"Not tonight. We're meeting at night, not in the daytime, so it's different. I think if, when he does this over, it's going to be in the daytime too." Lane patted Kris on the shoulder as they all sat down at the table with the three cups of coffee on it. "But right now, this wound's still a little sore."

"Oh." Kris nodded. He was disappointed, but he could understand Adam not wanting to relive that moment just yet. Later, later they'd confront it together when not as much was at stake. Last time had been like magic for him and he'd realized it had been for Adam too, but the magic was gone from the moment for Adam. If he could find some way to give him back the magic... 

"Plus Adam's already on a plane. So the do over is with Lane and a Lambert, just not the one who appreciates your glitter fetish." Neil smiled as he took the coffee Kris had clearly bought for Adam. "And the last time you weren't the one buying the coffee, were you?"

"No."

"Hey, do you want a muffin or something? Adam told me to buy you one because you look too skinny."

Kris shook his head. "That's an AdamandKris thing. And I'm too nervous right now. I might toss my cookies."

"Well, I'll pass on that delight. But we have something worth a lot more than thirty-eight cents and a muffin," Neil said in his deepest voice.

"What are you doing?" Lane asked, flicking Neil on the side of the head. "Trying to be Barnabus Collins in Dark Shadows?"

"Well, I do have an awesome ring." Neil handed Kris the small blue box.

"The ring? Why are you giving me back the ring?" Kris asked, hesitating to take the box.

"So you can ask him again. _Properly._ Properly is, I believe, the word he used." Lane pulled a large manila envelope out of her oversized leather bag. "And your mission, should you choose to accept it..."

"You've been waiting to say that your whole life, haven't you?" Kris asked, letting out a breath as he realized Adam was creating a twist on the do over. He leaned forward eagerly. "Which should I take first?" 

"The little box." Neil shoved it towards Kris. "Remember you met here, then went geocaching on your next date and hey-- Adam never did give me my boots back."

"Can we focus on this critical moment in Kris' life, you fool?" Lane snapped. "I know that as the second child you've always felt the need to garner attention whenever you could, but--"

"Excuse me." Kris rolled his eyes. "I'm gonna open the box now. But wait -- did Adam like the ring? Or should I change it --"

"He loves it." Neil smiled. "Even that morning when he was heartbroken, I could see in his eyes that he loved the ring. Good job." 

"Okay." Kris opened the box and smiled as he saw the slim roll of paper inside the ring.

"Read the damn note." Neil rolled his eyes as Kris sat there. "He labored over it for hours." 

"He did?" Kris held his breath, then let it out on a confused sigh when he read it. "It says, 'Bring the ring, your passport, some warm layering clothes -- and NICE boots. Oh forget it, Lane will help you pack. Then go to the next location. Love, Adam.' And there's coordinates and...oh hell. It's my turn to go on a geocaching adventure."

"Yeah. Hopefully Adam won't set it up so that you end up in federal custody," Neil teased.

"Yes, let's hope. Here's your passport and plane tickets to the first location, then you'll pick up the next set of instructions -- well, you know the drill." Lane shoved the envelope at Kris. 

"Wait. He labored over this for hours?" Kris touched the tiny note. "It says almost nothing."

"Really?" Lane asked with a smile. "I thought it said almost everything you need."

"You're right." Kris grinned and reached for his phone, his hands slippery with sudden sweat. "Where am I going? Where am I going...What? I'm going to the Lambert St. Louis Airport?"


	59. Do not be afraid...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italics = flashbacks  
> Rating: NC-17

**Chapter 59:  
Do not be afraid; our fate  
Cannot be taken from us; it is a gift.”   
― Dante Alighieri, Inferno**

 

"Hell. I'm in helllllll...." Kris whined to Lane as he traipsed from one end of the Lambert St. Louis Airport to the other. "I suppose Adam thinks he's very funny making me go see that same girl in the same food court again to pick up my box!"

"I'm quite sure he does," Lane agreed, then couldn't suppress her laughter. Adam could be such a bitch, but he was an amusing bitch. When she was able to stop laughing, she asked, "Do you have your doubloons? Two, right?"

"Yes, apparently I'll get the third in New York." Kris paused. "Wait. Is that the island I'm going to? No, can't be. Even though New Yorkers think it's like it's own country, it's not. I need my passport for..."

The silence lengthened.

Lane finally asked, "Did you hit your head?"

"No. Why?"

"Because a head injury is the only plausible explanation for you entertaining the notion that such a lame lead would inspire me to spill Adam's plans."

"Well, hell. So... I'm connecting there, though. Gotta be. Connecting to where? Oh who cares, just get me outta here!" Kris wailed. 

"You're a baby."

"And...You're laughing at me? Seriously? Did you laugh at Adam when he was stuck here?"

" _He_ was in federal custody. You're just bitching because there's no Chik-Fil-A." 

"Well, whatever. This place is grody and there's no good food and I just wanta get to Adam already... It's hell!"

"Technically, no. You're just waiting. Annoying, but there's an end to it. So it's not hell. You were already in hell before, weren't you?"

"Yeah. New Year's Day was hell. You're right. But this isn't heaven either, Lane. It's _St. Louis_."

"It's not hell, it's not heaven. Therefore, It's purgatory."

"And you're pedantic!" Kris complained, then stopped. "Wait. What's purgatory again?" 

"Purgatory is where some people believe you go to work on your sins before you get to move onto heaven. Like a way-station or train terminal or... an airport. A place where you wait before you can move on to where you should be in the end." 

"Kinda like the tv show, Lost. But set in St. Louis instead of a tropical island?"

"Something like that. Although if you think about it, an airport would actually be better. All the opportunities for new people to come in and older characters to leave."

"You've thought about this with Adam, haven't you?" Kris asked, knowing as the words left his mouth they were true. "He's thinking of using that idea for a video shoot. Ohmigod, am I the rehearsal for a video shoot?"

"Don't be ridiculous..." Lane bit her lip. Adam probably would try and mine Kris' experiences later on...

"Me?!! He's always trying to double dip--"

"I don't need to know that much about your sex life," Lane said crisply and hung up. 

 

"Sex again this year would be good..." Adam grumbled as he finished listening to Lane give an update to Kris' schedule. Of course, his flight from St. Louis was delayed. Of course, because that airport was just a vast sinkhole of suckiness. Damn it. Kris was supposed to be just hours behind him and now it looked like he wasn't going to get here until the next day. Once again, he was going to have to apologize to Kris and there were no Chik-Fil-A or Sonic shakes here. Although the concierge had told him about what he promised was a fantastic gelato place off of St. Mark's Plaza. Mmm. Ice cream. He could dribble that on Kris' cock and...

Quickly sending an apology text to Kris with a promise of the world's best blow job, he looked up as the promised valet knocked on the door to the suite and entered. Adam slid his phone into his pocket and smiled automatically as the valet, well, he presumed the old man was a valet, but how the hell did he know? He really should have spent time the last few weeks learning some basic Italian instead of screwing up his life. 

But move on, he told himself. Isn't that what you told Kris? He smiled when the old man appeared interested in the quality of the workmanship and exclaimed over the costumes. It felt weird to have someone else taking care of his personal clothes, but Lane had explained that it was the norm and the capes, if nothing else, would need pressing and steaming. Or maybe it was just that he was tired and anxious and Venice was... surreal -- all that fog and the costumes and masks and the water everywhere, it would be so damn easy to take a wrong step and end up in the lagoon and he didn't understand a damn word the guy was saying as he held up Kris' outfit. Nodding in agreement and hoping he hadn't agreed to sell off the outfit, Adam smiled again, handed the old man a tip and sighed in relief when he left. 

Tired. He should sleep. He pulled off his clothes and then contemplated whether he should go to sleep or take a shower after the long flight. Staring tiredly at the bed in the middle of the room, on an elevated platform, Adam contemplated how many times he and Kris were going to stumble or stub their toes or fall down stupid going to or from that bed. 

 

As he shifted in the hard plastic and ironically orange seat once again, Kris closed his eyes and wished it was as comfortable as his chair back home.   
__

_My chair is right here, Kris thought with relief. My comfy chair is still here. He'd dropped off the ice cream cake, then come up here, touching the walls along the way, looking into their bedroom and seeing no sign that Adam had slept there. Where was he sleeping? Seeing a pillow on the sofa, he wondered if Adam was camping out in here. Not that he'd be sleeping in the chair, the way Kris had fallen asleep a time or twelve with Emmaline when she was a baby._

_But the chair. It was here. And that's what mattered. It had survived. Intact. Ready to cushion him for years to come._

_Adam could've thrown it out. Or burned it. Or hacked it up in rage. Kris wouldn't have blamed him. Well, mostly. But Adam hadn't done any of those things, thrown it out or burned it or hacked it up. Instead, he had kept this chair he hated purely on aesthetic reasons, even after the person responsible for, as he used to say, "inflicting" it on him had betrayed his trust. Why?_

_Could it be that the chair was more than the site of many happy moments, but a symbol that Adam hadn't wanted to destroy? Just in case... Kris came home?_

_Sitting down with a relieved sigh, Kris whispered, "Home.." He leaned his head back, closed his eyes and took a deep breath, inhaling the faint wisps of his scent and Adam's mingling as the memories made in the chair wove themselves together in his brain like cobwebby lace, sticky and strong, the strands growing wider and firmer, holding him, binding his fear and his faith together, the wider twists of faith curling over and around the fear, pushing it under, until the whole was stronger, was something... more stable. Solid. Like orange mushroom upholstery, he thought with a small laugh._

_"Kris, are you okay?" Dani asked, her voice a soft sound. "Are you crying?"_

_Kris slowly opened his eyes to find Dani sitting on the coffee table in front of the chair, while Emmaline read a picture book on the sofa. "No. I'm laughing, actually. I'm relieved and happy and hopeful. And I'm realizing I should have had faith. In fate, as Adam would say."_

_"Why? Because he didn't throw out your chair?" Dani surmised._

_"Yup." Kris ran his hands up and down the arms, then pulled his knees up and wrapped his arms around his legs, leaning back in the chair, eyes closed, remembering all the times Adam had sat in this chair and he'd sat in Adam's lap. Or straddled him. Or he'd sat in this chair and Adam had knelt in front of him or... Well. He'd relive those happier times later. Here and there. Surely they had chairs in other places that would work too._

_When Kris said nothing more, Dani asked curiously, "How_ did _you end up with this chair?"_

 _"I found it on the street. Just kind of randomly. Walking down a street that wasn't mine. I found it. I'd been in that crappy apartment for a few weeks and still hadn't found any furniture I could afford, not even at the thrift shops. I was wondering if it made much difference that I had four walls or if I was homeless if I didn't have anything but the floor to sit on. I was getting depressed again, to be honest. Feeling sorry for myself. And then I saw this chair with these silly mushrooms and it made me smile. It was out on the curb for trash." Kris smiled sheepishly. "It still looked pretty good to me. Sturdy, you know. And it had made me laugh when I didn't think I'd laugh again. But basically, I needed some furniture -- well,_ any _furniture -- and there it was. One man's trash is another man's treasure. Just like me and Geoffrey, right?"_

_"Kris. You were never trash."_

_"I was thrown out like it." Kris shrugged and continued in a quiet whisper for Dani's ears only. "By my parents, but not Adam. I get that now. He was mad but he wanted me to fight back, to tell him what he needed to hear. He threw me out of the room, but he wasn't throwing me out of his life. I _get_ that, seeing this chair. He... on some level, he had hope. Even if he didn't realize it. He thought I was coming back." Hugging his knees again, Kris smiled. "But, anyway, the chair...All it needed was some elbow grease and TLC. Both. And bringing it home, cleaning it up and having it in my dingy apartment... it gave me hope, you know?"_

_Nodding as she stood up, Dani asked, "Did you ever realize that Adam had your chair re-stuffed at least once a year?"_

_"What?" Kris sat up straight with a start. "He hates this chair."_

_"But he loves you." Dani ran her hand along the top curve of the chair back. "And over time the chair got kind of too squishy, so he had it restuffed. And the fabric got frayed, so he had it lined."_

_"I never knew..." Kris gaped at Dani. "I thought the chair was indestructible."_

_"No. It needed some help."_

_Kris ran his hands along the upholstered arms once again and looked closely at the chair for the first time in... maybe, he thought, ever. And suddenly he saw the little patches of wear, the frayed edges, the worn pattern with yes, the lining supporting it underneath. Oh he'd seen them all before, but never so clearly or never so consciously. But so many memories were in this chair, he'd only ever seen those moments. Raising his voice, he explained, "The chair is beautiful to me, but I know it's not to him. So I thought, in keeping with the theme of this do over, that I'd add some glitter to it. What do you think, Emmaline?"_

_"He'll like that." Emmaline bounced onto the sofa, then seeing the look Kris sent her, sat back down and sighed as loudly as she could. When Kris frowned harder, she smiled and asked, "What color?"_

_"Kind of a gold orange." Standing up, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small plastic vial and uncapped it, pouring a small cone-shaped pile into his palm. "What's the best way to spread the glitter, do ya think?"_

_"Hmm." Dani pondered, then suggested, "Cup it in your hands and blow, like birthday candles. Make a wish, while you're at it."_

_I wish... Kris thought, his eyes closed. I wish we could start over again in that coffeshop. Tell our life stories over a cup or twelve of coffee and start over. Fresh. But with all the wisdom we've gained. So it's new, but better. Suddenly the words to a song he had taught so many years ago at the pre-school came back to him, but with new words. Softly he sang, "Make new love, but keep the old, one is silver and the other's gold." Yes, there, that was a good wish. New and old at the same time, but even better._

_There. He nodded and blew gently, opening his eyes to watch the glitter drift over the chair, faster than dust motes but not as fast as his wish._

_"What was your wish?" Dani asked curiously. Kris' face had been so intensely yearning._

_"He can't tell, Mama. Or it won't come true!" Emmaline reminded her._

__

 

"Yes, I've always wanted to come to the Venice Carnevale and thank you, yes, I do have an amazing cape," Adam politely told the fans after signing an autograph. So immersed in his thoughts about finally seeing Kris after all these weeks and... well, to be honest, the sex they would be having, he hadn't thought to wear his baseball cap or sunglasses. Stupid move. Not that he'd also expected to meet fan after fan at the airport. He smiled as the two girls giggled as they rushed back to their parents and disappeared deep into the Marco Polo Airport. Marco Polo, indeed. Apparently he needed to be playing that game. Marco...Polo.... Where was Kris? Why wasn't he answering his phone? He was supposed to have gotten off that plane half an hour ago. Marco...Polo.... 

 

Was this journey ever going to end? Kris wiped a tired hand across his forehead, wandering around the exit to the airport, wondering where Adam was when he caught sight of his name on a small sign held by a man in a straw hat. Oh, Adam must have sent a driver. In costume. Weird. Then again, not so much. It was Carnevale and Adam did love playing dress up and using other people as Ken dolls. Hence the fittings he'd had before New Year's for his cape and hat. Who knew you needed a fitting for a cape? He shrugged and walked up half-expecting to just be handed another box, but the tall, wiry man just looked at him blankly. Oh, he must be waiting for confirmation of his identity. So apparently not everyone in the world knew about his short-lived career as a prostitute. Well, that was good. "Uh... I'm Kris Allen?"

"Ah, signor. _Infine!_ Doubloon?" The man asked, holding out his hand.

"Oh, oh, sure!" Kris smiled in relief that Adam must have sent the guy as his last guide to the final destination. He shrugged his shoulder to bring his oversized ifhalf-empty travel backpack around to his front, unzipped a pocket and grinning, handed one of his three doubloons to the guy, who shoved it in his pocket and nodded gravely. Okay, so no smiles. Maybe romantic reconciliations were serious business in Venice. 

" _Grazie._ Charoni." The man pointed to himself, then off in some direction Kris couldn't tell. " _Andiamo,_ Signor Allen!" He took off at a fast clip.

Kris blinked, then hurried after him. He stopped short when they reached a boat... oh wait, that's right. Venice. Water. Boats for taxis or limos. D'uh. He must be really tired. While he figured that out, the man jumped on board, then turned and stared at Kris.

"An. Di. A. Mo!"

"Oh, sure." Well, he may not know exactly what the word meant, but Kris would bet it meant something like, 'move your ass, stupidhead.' He nodded and stepped into the boat, holding tightly onto the railing as the boat dipped and swayed in the dark water. It was Venice. Of course he was getting there by water. Wherever there was. Speaking of which. Where the hell were they going? 

"Donde es--" Kris bit his words off. High school Spanish wasn't going to work. He'd read the useful phrases portion of the little guidebook Lane had given him on the plane ride over. What was it... He scrabbled in his backpack for the book and squinted in the misty light, struggling to say, "Do. Ve st...st...iamo an..da..nado?" 

" _Comincerete sopra_."

"Okaaaay." Kris shrugged. No flipping idea what the guy had said. Not like it mattered. He was going wherever this boatman took him. He'd have to trust the guy wasn't some mass murderer. Or leading him into some other hell, because really he'd paid his dues, hadn't he? Learned his lesson down some mighty crooked paths? 

The twists and turns in the water through air that looked like he was swimming with his eyes open confused him enough that he stopped trying to figure it out and leaned back to enjoy the ride. After all, he was in Venice, a destination he and Adam had talked about since that long ago date at the Getty Museum.

Somehow in all the years, through all the travels and even after hearing that the city might sink back into the ocean, its grandeur drowning with slow gurgles, somehow they had never made it here. Something had always come up, making them decide, 'next year'. He'd always imagined seeing it with Adam, but truth to tell, he was enjoying the quietude -- it seemed the best way to see the city that could become a watery ghost town, its somnolence broken only occasionally by a shout from the unseen, a boat engine in the distance somewhere, a soft slurping slap as water hit a crumbling foundation behind him and then a magnificently restored mansion in front of him. 

" _Canale Grande,_ " the boatman said abruptly some time later, laughing in a low growl when Kris jumped and his hand slapped the side of the boat. He pointed ahead, " _Ponte di Rialto_." 

"Holy shit, this smalltown boy is on the Grand Canal in Venice!" Kris whistled under his breath. "This isn't Venice Beach and that's not the Rialto Theater." He looked around, seeing people in elaborate costumes that would've fit into another century, then looked up and around, craning his head back to look at one pointy roof top, then another, the buildings with their exotic designs making him wish he'd thought to bring his real camera. Well, he could buy postcards later. That is, if he and Adam ever left their hotel room. He grinned and then fidgeted. How long until he got to wherever it was? Adam had probably picked out some awesome hotel, totally decadent and luxurious... like that? "Whoa."

"Ah, _Ca' D'Oro. Ca' Castello. Bellissimo, si?_ "

"Si." Kris gaped. He had read about this building in his guidebook. And here it was. Still standing after all these years, defiant of the waters wanting to consume it. "Oro...Gold."

" _Palazzo Santa Sofia_."

Kris nodded, twisting his neck to keep looking at it. Apparently it had two names. Castle, palace... Oh. That whole storming the castle business and... they were sailing past it. Okay. He shrugged. So they weren't meeting there. Probably at their hotel. He didn't care where it was, as long as they got there soon. All he needed was a bed and Adam. Then again, a wall or floor would do fine too at this point. 

At least the journey along the canal was beautiful enough to distract him from getting an unwelcome erection in the slow-moving boat with beautiful buildings on either side, shrouded in the mist, their tan and pink and cream facades shimmering silver in the mist the weak sunlight could barely penetrate. He shivered in the damp air as the boat turned down a much smaller canal, then another, going under bridge after bridge, each one different, then started when the boatman cut the low-powered engine.

With a muffled thud, the boat came to a stop next to a red pole with a gold point on top. Charoni threw a rope around it, winding it loosely and stepped out, holding a hand out for Kris to grasp. " _Fare il primo passo_."

Confused, Kris took the hand and then stopped as he realized that Charoni reminded him of a taller, skinnier version of his father. Huh. Maybe the Allens had some Italian in their veins. He shrugged and stepped onto what would be a dock anywhere else, but he guessed in Venice it was the street. A very narrow street. Geez. Had to be careful or you'd end in the water. Dark water. Scary water in this murky light. He'd have to take care not to step backwards. He tilted his head back to look up, glad that there was nothing remotely like a skyscraper here, so he was easily able to take in the lacy windows and balconies of the peach and tan buildings before him. There were no obvious signs for hotels or actually, signs of life as you usually found outside hotels, so... He turned back to the boatman. "What... I mean, Que... or Do. Ve...?"

" _Comincerete sopra. Qui._ " The boatman pointed forward, twirling his finger in a semi-circle.

"I don't get it..." Kris whispered in frustration, then jerked in surprise as the boatman gave him a little shove forward with one hand, his other still pointing and Kris finally saw a short little building, no wider than the door. What the heck? Or maybe it was just a door. A very tilted door on a very tilted building like something Alice might have tumbled down. Or through. But now that he saw it, he didn't know why he hadn't seen it before. "Oh!" Guess he had needed a little push to see through the fog. He smiled at the boatman sheepishly. "Sorry."

Sighing, Charoni said in his gruff voice, " _Chi cerca trova!_ " and pointed towards the door again. " _Comincerete sopra. Qui._ "

Kris peered at the letters inscribed in the carved stone arch surrounding the door. It didn't say that _comin_ whatever word. It was some super long phrase, that, oh yea, did begin with _Qui_. Damn. The carving was old and worn by wind and rain and the salt air. He stepped forward to read it better... _Qui si convien lasciare ogne sospetto_... What the hell?

Well, who cared? He could read it later. Or not, since he didn't read Italian. Right now, he had bigger fish to fry. He needed to go inside and get his next box, because he didn't really think this was a hotel. Oh, he should probably tip the boatman, Charoni. 

What was the word... He smiled and turned, " _Grazie_ \---" He began, then stopped as he realized he could see nothing but fog. No boat and no boatman, just the echoing sound of water slapping against the foundations. "Okeydokey." He turned back around and waved his hand in front of him, as if he could move the mists. 

Why the hell had Adam booked them into this place? Or sent him here, if it wasn't a hotel? It looked like the only reason the narrow building was still standing was because the two much larger and from what he could tell, much better preserved buildings on either side were holding it up, much like Adam and Cale had held up Tommy one night when he'd had way too much to drink on tour. 

"Hello? I mean, bu... Bu. On. Gi. Or. No?" Kris called out as he hesitantly pushed open the green wooden door--

_Creeeeeeeeeeeeeakkkkkkkk_

The door that looked way older than he was. By maybe a century. Or two. Possibly even three. Then the fog seemed to rush in on little cat feet or something, some poem Adam said once, swirling around his ankles and making him shiver. "Okay, you know what, Adam?" He whispered, because it seemed like whispering was the way to go. Maybe then the fog monsters wouldn't get you. "Venice is seriously kah-reeeeeepy. Like real-life Dark Shadows or Twilight Zone or something..."

"Signor Allen?"

"Holy...." Kris jumped at the voice--

**Bang!**

He jumped again as the door slammed behind him. He had not pulled it closed and given how creaky it had been opening, it hadn't closed on its own. Getting more creepy by the moment. He stepped forward cautiously, going down a hall or given how narrow the building had looked from the outside, maybe this was the whole house or whatever it was. Didn't think it was a house or a hotel. Maybe a really creepy Addamn Family hotel, though. Especially with all those masks on the wall, with their sightless black eyes staring at him, their open mouths mocking him and... Whoa. He needed to get a grip. Venice was famous for its masks. One reason why Adam had been so intrigued by Carnevale here. 

Or maybe Adam had combined this rendezvous with Halloween and was sending him to some Venetian fun house to scare the crap out of him so he'd leap into Adam's arms. Oh, could be. Adam had been beating himself up about New Year's Day and it wouldn't surprise Kris if he was fretting himself to a twizzle over Kris being angry with him. Ridiculous but -- Hey. Where had that voice come from, anyway? He clutched his backpack tightly and stopped. If some creepy monster in a mask was going to get him, he was staying close to the door. He turned around, looking for the door, but then stopped. He had come to Venice to find Adam and if he had to walk through some creep-ass mask house, big deal.

" _Signor Allen! Andiamo!_ "

Not understanding the word, but understanding the tone, Kris reluctantly stepped further inside. Might as well get it over with. As his eyes acclimated to the wavering light and he walked forward into seeming blackness, he suddenly realized that against the blackness was the glitter of gold and silver, white and purple and every color under the sun. Or not, given how dark the place was and he jumped when something soft and feathery brushed against him. He batted it away, his fingers recoiling, then telling him that he was actually touching a feather. Of course, the Carnevale costumes. He was in a costume shop of some kind. 

Inhaling a deep breath, his lungs filled with what he was sure was the dust of ages. And probably dead bodies. He stared. Now that his eyes were accustomed to the darkness it was as if suddenly, a light had been switched and he saw the gleam and glitter of colors. This black-lit closet of a shop was actually awash with color. And costumes. With masks. Feathers and gemstones and gold and silver. The colors gleamed against the black background like jewels in a jewelbox. "Adam would love this place!" he breathed. "Oh, of course, that's why I'm here. I need to be dressed so he can undress me. Although why that couldn't wait until tomorrow, I don't even know, but--"

"Signor Allen?" 

Kris turned, realizing that a wizened old man was looking at him from between the two sides of a curtain. The man stepped forward, holding out his hand. "Doubloon, _signor_?" 

The minute the plastic disk left his hand, the little old man grabbed his arm and pulled him into a small room at the back of the shop behind the curtain. Digging in his heels, Kris scrabbled for purchase on the counter. There was probably an ax murderer back there who would cut his body up into pieces and then drop each piece in some dead end portion of the canal or... "Oh. Capes!"

Rolling his eyes, the old man pointed Kris toward a small table in the back corner of the back room of the shop. " _I vostri vestiti._

" _Vestiti_..." Kris repeated. Sounded like vest or vestments or...oh. Clothes. His clothes? He turned back to the old man, pointing from the clothes to himself.

Nodding impatiently, the old man reached out a bony hand, pulled a pair of pants from the table and snapped it in the air before holding it up in front of Kris.

"My size, I guess..." Kris smiled apologetically, then laughed with delight when he saw what the pants had hidden. A mask. "Wow, the mask..." He smiled and traced the painted design with his fingertip. Drawn around the eye hole was Adam's Eye of Horus tattoo in blue and purple and silver with what looked like glitter embedded in the paint. A mark of protection. It was... perfect. "This looks awesome on the mask. _Grazie._ "

" _Bene_." The old man shoved the pants at Kris, then grabbed a shirt from the table and pushed it into his arms as well. He stepped back, flicking his hand at Kris, urging him toward a floor screen in the back. 

Kris nodded and took a stop, then jerked to a halt as the man grabbed his arm with surprising strength for one so old. Looking back curiously, Kris laughed again as he saw the old man's look of horror as he stared at his sneakers. "What's wrong with my sneakers?"

" _Dio non voglio!_ " The old man gasped, reaching for the clothes.

Lifting his backpack in his hands, Kris patted it and said, "Boots? In here?" Seeing the apparent incomprehension on the man's face, Kris unzipped the backpack and pulled out one of the boots Lane had pressed on him, a plain black ankle boot with a small heel.

Muttering under his breath, the old man heaved a sigh of relief and pressed the clothes back at Kris, once again flicking his fingers impatiently. Moving behind the screen, Kris dropped his backpack on the floor, then hung the clothes on wall pegs. After toeing off his sneakers, he changed shirts, shivering as the sheer silky fabric teased his nipples, then plucked at the voluminous white sleeves, hesitating before unzipping his jeans. He bit his lip, then peered through the hinged fold in the screen to see the old man writing something in a book. Relieved, Kris hurried to tug off his jeans and then pull on the black pants. Button fly. "Oof!" He hissed out as he began buttoning them, sucking in his stomach. "Could they be any tighter?" 

Like why weren't there any zippers, what was up with the button fly? Although Adam might get off on that, he had that one time when Kris had worn a pair of Levis with the button fly, but then the jeans were ruined when Kris got a hard on over the _look_ Adam was giving him and Adam had wanted him out of those jeans _right the fuck now_ and had ended up ripping them in his hurry. Damn, that had been so much fun. Why hadn't he bought another pair of those jeans?

" _Non lo so! Stupido!_ Eh! Signor Allen?" The old man rapped on the screen.

"Oh. I guess you wanta see if they fit?" Kris walked around the edge and then self-consciously waited, relaxing when the old man smiled at him in a friendly way. The old dude might be a little impatient, but he was nice enough. Not creepy, not when he smiled. Then he just seemed like a grandpa type. "I think they're tight, but I guess Adam picked them out? Oh!" Kris yelped when the old man tossed another black pair -- this time, in leather -- at him. "Yeah, that's Adam." He grinned and went back behind the screen. 

Adam was always trying to get him in leather pants and he always resisted. He just wasn't a leather pants kinda guy, but he'd do it for Adam this time. Hell, he was in Venice at Carnevale -- if he couldn't dress up then, when could he? Besides Adam would like it and... He laughed as he went to zip up the pants only to discover that -- good god! -- they were a lace-up style. 

Hesitating once again, he went back out to show the old man-- must be a tailor -- the pants. He blushed when the man gave him a thumbs up and then looked down in embarrassment jerking his head up when the old man patted him on the head, then gave him a little push behind the screen, pointing at his boots. Pulling them on, he muttered, "Seriously Adam...Lace-up? That's a little obvious, isn't? Plus they take too long to get out of!" He paused when he thought he heard a snicker, peering around the screen, but the old man was blandly writing in that book again. Probably his imagination running wild on lack of sleep, anxiety and anticipation. "Really, Adam, couldn't this fitting have waited until after we'd met back up and fucked ourselves silly? Priorities!" 

Pressing his lips together, the old man looked up, nodded and motioned for Kris to fold his clothes up in his backpack. Thankfully, Lane had insisted he pack even more lightly than usual since Adam had clothes waiting for him here. The old man smiled approvingly when Kris hurried to do so, then handed him several more shirts and an extra pair of pants and Kris stuffed them inside. Lane had been right, Kris thought, he hadn't need to pack much since Adam was basically giving him a small wardrobe. 

Waiting impatiently, the old handed Kris a small hat with white feathers to try on, then another with blue feathers. 

"You must have an amazing inventory with all this stuff that fits me so perfectly. Even the hats!" Kris exclaimed as he looked at himself in the small mirror behind the screen. If being with Adam Fucking Lambert for nearly six years had taught him nothing, it had taught him about clothing was supposed to fit in Adam's world and that there were actual sizes for hats. Who knew? "Well, give me a beanie any day, but Adam had these hats -- which I always thought Adam wore just to make himself even taller because Adam liked being the tallest guy in the room..."

"Mmm..."

"And I totally don't think that short man syndrome idea is true, do you?" Kris asked as the old man pulled him in front of an ancient mirror speckled with age so heavily it was like looking through a silver lace curtain.

"Mmm..." 

He was babbling to the old guy, but the guy was nodding and shaking his head in seemingly the right places and had been patient when Kris fumbled with the lace-up closure, so Kris smiled over his instinctive recoil as the old man handed him a huge hat. Huge. Gargantuan. With feathers. Ridiculous. He was going to look utterly stupid in this hat, like he was trying to compensate for something.

"Do I hafta?" Kris complained. That hat was bigger than he was. When you counted the feathery trim on the brim and oh dear god, the huge feather on the back. Orange feathers that sparkled? "No way." 

Tapping his foot, the tailor glared at Kris. Then tapped his foot some more.

"I'm gonna kill you, Adam...." Kris hissed.

"Signor Lambert? _Lei l'ama._ " The old man smirked and shoved the hat toward Kris again. Gesturing with his hands, he indicated that Kris should put it on.

Sighing in resignation, Kris hefted the hat up and gingerly put it on his head, blinking when orange glitter seemed to drift down. He blinked and the shiny motes were gone. Thankfully. The hat did transform the outfit into something special, though. Speaking of special, he began, then wiped his lip of a speck of glitter, continuing on to say, "Adam. Adamadamadam. I should go to him, right? Now. I'm totally ready to see him now. I'm never gonna look better than this."

"Ah. _Perfetto._ " The old man smiled.

"Well, I dunno know if it's perfect, but..." Tilting the hat higher on one side, Kris grinned. For all its size, it was perfectly balanced and easy to wear. "I look...what's the word? Piratish? Rakish? Adam uses that word. That's it. Rakish. I look like I'm a bad ass." 

The old man flicked the feather.

Kris laughed. "Hey, Adam's a bad ass, feathers and all. So I can be a bad ass with feathers too." He stood up straight and nearly bounced with excitement when the old man reached back to the table and with a grin and a flourish, swirled a cape around his shoulder. Kris sneezed as more orange glitter seemed to dance around them. "Wow! Awesome! I feel like a superhero! Ready to slay dragons and our past mistakes and-- " He laughed as he swished the cape around himself. Then did it again. Okay, the cape was just as much fun as he'd thought it would be and -- "Wow! This is fun, but I need to get to Adam. Adamadamadam..." He grinned, still looking at his pleased expression in the mirror. 

Weird. He looked younger... well, probably because he wasn't a nervous wreck any more, but the weight he'd lost the last few weeks made him look like he had when he'd first met Adam. Although he did look better than that, with more flesh to his face and frame. Healthier. Happier. Hopeful. He grinned and flicked his own feather as the old man slapped something into his mid-section in mid-cape-swish. "Oh. Another hat?"

"No." 

"A sword!" Kris exclaimed in excitement when he finally looked down, watching as the old man showed him how to strap on the belt and insert the sword into the scabbard. Heh. Scabbard. He had a scabbard. This was so fucking cool! "I look like one of the Musketeers."

"Dumas?" The old man scowled and pretended to spit. "Pfft!" He glared at Kris, then carefully handed him the custom mask, indicating Kris should tie it around his neck using the ribbons threaded through the side.

"Okay." Kris shrugged as he tied the ribbons in a double knot behind his neck. "I don't know where to go now. So do I get a box or what?" He paused, realizing the old man didn't speak English. The word for where was... " _Dove.._?"

"Ah. Caffè Florian. _Andiamo!_ " The old man poked Kris in the shoulder, then pointed to the hallway.

Kris shook his head at the mischief in the man's eyes. He was clearly enjoying this little game. "Caffè Florian. Caffè. Must be a restaurant. Where... _Dove_?"

"Follow the bells to St. Mark's. The piazza of St. Mark's Cathedral. You cannot miss it." 

Kris gaped as his brain registered that the man spoke perfect English. Accented, but perfectly understandable English. "I... you... Adam. I will kill him."

"No, you will not. He is your _anima gemina,_ how you say? Soul mate? _Destino_."

"Destiny."

"Yes. You will go to Caffè Florian and meet your _destino_."

"It's a restaurant?"

"Coffeehouse." 

"Coffeehouse?" Kris whirled around and stared at the old man. "They have Starbucks here?"

"Caffè Florian is no Starbucks. Pah! This is Venezia! Not Burbank! It has the oldest coffeehouse in the world, in same piazza as Basilica di San Marco! Not next to a McDonald's!"

"Whoa. Sorry!" Kris held up his hands in apology. 

The old man sniffed, then reached over to brush Kris' shoulders. "Much older than your Starbucks. For centuries, it has seen many lovers meeting, many lovers' quarrels, many intrigues, many lovers meeting again. You understand?" 

"Oh. Perfect," Kris whispered. Adam had thought of everything.

" _Perfetto_." The old man smiled and nodded. "You will go there. You will meet this beautiful man and smile at each other as if you were meeting for the first time and tell your stories of how you came here to this place and time with your smiles _and_ scars." He pointed to Kris' backpack with a wry smile. "And baggage. Then you will tell him you love him and he will say the same to you. That is the way of it. That is your story. Si?"

Kris stared, then smiled slowly. "That about sums it up."

"Si. Then you will start your new book -- write a song about it."

"Si." Kris nodded. He blinked in surprise when the old man picked up the book he'd been writing in and handed it to Kris. Keeping an eye on him -- because the guy might be ancient and given the fit of the pants, a damn fine tailor, which Adam would appreciate, but he was full of surprises -- Kris stuffed the book in his backpack and zipped it up. 

" _Bene. Andiamo!_ " The old man guided Kris down a hallway that seemed much shorter on the way out than on the way in. The door opened in his hand without a creak and he pointed outside into the misty fog. "Caffè Florian. There. You will begin your _storia d’amore._ Again." 

Taking a step outside, Kris looked from left to right, then paused, closing his eyes to listen. Bells, he was supposed to listen for bells. Moments later, he heard them, much louder than he expected. Either those bells were damn loud or he was much closer to his destination... He grinned... _Destino_ than he'd expected. Story of his life probably. Holding his breath as he listened, turning his head to the right and left and then turning his whole body around, he tried to determine the direction when suddenly they clanged again and he nodded.

"This way," he decided and moved forward, only to pause a moment later when he heard the old man call out one last time. 

"Have fun stormin' the castle!"

" _Grazie_!" Kris turned around to wave, but saw nothing but the faint lacy tracings of ancient stacks of stone behind him. He set off, nearly running, but careful of falling into the water with a careless misstep. 

Adamadamadam... Hurrying down what seemed like an actual street, Kris took a breath and hustled up a set of stairs and over a bridge, then blinked as he reached the middle and saw a small sign with an arrow pointing to St. Mark's. Had there been other signs he'd missed? Huh. Well, this walk hadn't been too annoying, the crooked and confusing ways had seemed less confusing, more straight this time, maybe because he knew his destination, could hear it. 

Coming over the bridge, he followed the sign, then another, then laughed in relief when he saw a series of expensive boutiques and a street filled with people, many of them in costume too. Another sign and he turned right and there it was. Coming out from under the covered walkway, he saw the basilica in front of him, the bell tower -- just like at Disney World, only way bigger. Just had to find this coffeehouse... Striding into the center of the piazza, making his way through the throngs of people admiring each other's costumes, he stood on tip toe looking around. Had to be here somewhere. 

A second later, he spotted a tall and very sparkly purple feather flicking over the heads of the crowd and grinned. Had to be Adam. He'd bet everything he owned -- which at this point didn't amount to much more than his guitar and his orange mushroom chair -- that he was following Adam straight to Florian. 

"Yesss!" Kris hissed in a low tone as he came up under the walkway roof and saw the sign, just as he watched the purple feather bob up, then down as Adam obviously bent to make sure his feather didn't get caught in the doorway. Kris slid around a supporting column, cautiously peeking in, hoping he'd see Adam first. He smiled as he saw Adam standing there, looking around, while absently picking at his nail polish with an anxious look on his face. 

Kris tried the door, then swore when his tugging did not move it. Locked. Okay, look. Oh. Main door was to the right. He pulled on the door handle, too hard, jumping when it flew back at him, then cursed again when his hat knocked against the door jamb. Coloring, he sheepishly looked at the waiters who were staring at him. Taking a breath, he tapped Adam on the shoulder.

"May I buy you a cup of coffee?" Kris asked, his heart pounding.

"Kris?" Adam squeaked as he whirled around. "Finally!"

Kris held onto his hat as Adam immediately enfolded him in his arms and squeezed him tightly. 

"Thank fuck! I've been a nervous wreck." Adam put his chin on the crown of Kris' soft hat and slid his hands under Kris' cape, eager to get closer to flesh and bone and the warmth he'd missed.

"Huh?" Kris tried to pull back to look at Adam's face, but the arms holding him would not let go. 

"Just stay. Because I'm not letting you go," Adam hissed in a low tone. The last few hours had been a nightmare. He'd learned a lesson about real fear and holding on tight to what mattered in those hours. 

_Because I'm not letting you go._ That was possibly the best sentence he'd heard in more than a month. Kris smiled, closed his eyes, and wiggled deeper into Adam's embrace. "Why? I wasn't gonna stand you up or anything! I'm the definition of a sure thing, sweetie."

Pushing back, Adam stared at the orange feather in Kris' hat. Did it seriously have glitter on it? Had Kris been buying hats while he'd been going crazy? Hats to match his stupid chair? "It's been six hours!"

"What? No way!"

"What were you _doing_? Or _where_ were you? Why weren't you answering your phone? I was out there looking for you and then I got lost too. I know it's easy to get lost on these streets, that aren't really streets, alleys, I'd guess you call them and all these little bridges and there is no straight way and then you think you're going somewhere--"

"And I did. Here!" Kris said quickly, reaching up to touch Adam's lips, then his chest. Poor Adam, his heart was pounding. "I'm okay. We must've missed each other somehow. I honest to god don't know where six hours went, but I'm here now." 

"Signor Lambert?" The waiter smiled and led them to a table. Kris pushed his backpack under his chair, which was a whole lot daintier than the chairs at Starbucks. After the waiter began in a spate of Italian, "I'll order!" he announced, then laughed when Adam arched a skeptical eyebrow.

"Fine. I'll text Lane and let her know you're alive." Adam shook his head over his phone and typed quickly, while Kris fumbled in some sort of combination of smiles, fake Italian and worse Spanish and god knows what he ordered, but who cared what they ate? 

"I hope I didn't order everything, because I've had some unexpected large expenses recently," Kris said with deliberate honesty. He realized he was going to have to be transparent about his money. "Those billboards had cost the sun, moon and stars. Worth every penny."

"You can buy the coffee, I'll take care of the rest." Taking a deep breath and smiling as he stared at Kris who was finally -- finally! -- in front of him, within touching distance, again, Adam began. "Hi. My name is Adam Lambert. And I came here, hoping to meet a nice, funny guy with a cute butt, a gorgeous face, an interest in music, a tendency to be a mama's boy and the warmest eyes ever."

Kris smiled back automatically, then blinked as he realized Adam was wiggling his eyebrows at him and wearing that eager, conspiratorial look that told him that he was supposed to get they were playing some game, just the two of them. "Hi... I'm Kris Allen and..." He trailed off and suddenly remembered.

 

_  
"If I could have a do-over...." Kris sighed. "If I could have a do-over, I'd take the opportunity to bump into him, but I'd tell him that this older guy sent me to meet him because he thought we were perfect for each other."  
_

 

"Hi." Kris stuck his hand out to shake and smiled when Adam grasped it and held on. "My name is Kris Allen, I'm a huge fan, but don't freak out about that because I only have years of fantasies I expect you to enact for me..." He drawled, then giggled when Adam stared at him like a deer in the headlights. Clearing his throat, he continued in a rush, "I think you're super hot and amazingly talented and I've heard you're a mama's boy too and this older dude sent me to meet you because he thinks we're perfect for each other."

"Oh?" Adam went to pull his hand back and when Kris held onto it, he smiled slowly. "What older dude?"

"This ancient guy in a costume shop." Kris flicked his finger at the edge of his cape. "But that's not important."

"No?" Adam asked, distracted by the cape. Where had Kris gotten that garment anyway? The workmanship was exquisite. Was that hand-sewing?

"No," Kris said firmly, squeezing Adam's hand hard and leaning forward. "What's important is that we are meeting. And that, like the guy said..." He paused to remember, repeating the words in his mind, then nodded. "He said that you're my _anima gemella._ "

" _Anima gemella_..." Adam leaned forward and then laughed when the brims of their hats touched. "That sounds very romantic."

"It means that you are my soul mate." Kris paused again. " _Mio destino_." He grinned when he saw the spark in Adam's eyes and the flush on his face, bare of makeup above the matching mask tied around his neck, a mask that matched his. But the face above was far more interesting. Hmm. Adam liked the Italian. Well, hell. He was going to buy Rosetta Stone when they got home. 

"Well, if you're my soul mate, I think you should tell me something about yourself."

"Hmm. I need to prove it?"

"No. _Reveal_ it."

Kris started, then staring into the blue eyes he'd never grow tired of seeing, whispered, "Reveal it..."

"Peel back the layers and show me your truth," Adam whispered back. They were so close. He could feel it, sense it. Kris was ready to finally show him everything. Here in a coffeeshop, he would finish what he started so long ago in another coffeeshop. "Show me your soul so I can see my mate."

Keeping hold of Adam's hand, Kris ran his thumb over Adam's palm, then slid his fingertips up under the cuff of Adam's shirt, feeling the pulse pounding against the fragile skin over the underside of Adam's wrist. That was what courtship -- to use an old-fashioned term -- was, wasn't it? The slow revelation of the truth under layers. Although, for him, maybe not. That first time, in that coffeehouse, he'd looked at Adam and seen every truth he needed to see. Because Adam was an open book. He, however, had not been. No wonder he'd fallen in love before the glitter hit the ground and Adam had not. He grimaced, then started to speak in a hurry. Now that he was touching Adam's skin, he really wanted to be touching all of Adam's skin. Every last freckle. With his tongue.

Seeing the heat in Kris' face as he looked at him, then touched his tongue to his bottom lip, Adam blushed. "Your story?"

"I moved to LA to try and make it in music. I haven't set the world on fire, but I have a regular gig at a coffee house, I've played in a touring band with an _awesome_ singer, he's so hot he burns up the stage... I also volunteer music teacher in the LA school system. Oh and I've also been trying to shop around a cd. I've gotten some offers I don't want to accept, but in the end I think I want to go the indie route and find someone to help me produce it."

"You sound like a success to me. You also sound busy. Anything else?" Adam asked, happy to hear Kris' voice again, the soft rhythm of his slow cadence beating in time with his heartbeat, the way it always had. He smiled and watched Kris' face, glad it was a little fuller than the last time, but he could still stand to eat. 

"I also bartend in this dive bar."

"Why? Sounds like your music keeps you busy enough." Adam sat back as the waiter set down two cups of coffee and some pastries in front of them. 

Picking up his coffee, Kris took a long sip. "The bar... John and the guys, they're... like my hometown, ya know."

"The place where everybody knows your name and they're always glad you came?" Adam sang in a soft voice.

"Exactly. They replaced my natural family, back in Arkansas."

"Ah. You're one of the boys who fled to the big city because the small town kicked them out?"

"You've heard the story before."

"Every story is unique. Tell me," Adam urged. He reached out and gently ran a fingertip along Kris' jawline, feeling the tension there. "I need to know."

"I need to tell you." Kris sighed and closed his eyes, leaning his cheek into Adam's cupped hand. He laughed when Adam suddenly moved and tweaked his nose. Adam always knew how to quickly shake him out of any melancholy. He'd brought sunshine and glitter into his life right from the beginning and... Kris paused for a quick little prayer of thanks.... thank god, he always would. This was...forever. Kris knew it. "I need to tell you," he repeated, then smiled.

"You do. Do you know what skeletons and gay men have in common?"

"No?"

"They both need to come out of the closet."

Laughing, Kris felt his tense muscles relax. Just like the first time, this meeting was a perfect start. A new start. "Okay. I have family issues. My mom is okay these days, but I'm dead to my father."

"His loss," Adam said firmly, leaning across the small table to squeeze Kris' shoulder. "Any decent man would be proud for you to be his son. I'm sure of it."

"Thank you," Kris said softly as he touched Adam's hand, glad Adam had foregone gloves today. Touching him was... necessary. "That means a lot to me. And I've been lucky 'cause I met another guy who didn't have have any kids, so he kinda took me under his wing. Been more of a dad to me than my own. But the truth is, I've had a hard time replacing my biological father's voice in my head. Intellectually, I know I'm a good man, but inside sometimes I feel like the little boy who wants his father to be proud of him, sometimes I still hear his voice in my head..." Kris shook his head. "It's my...flaw. My fear. Or one of them. I have some things I have to work on."

"Insecurities. The fear of not measuring up. They're one of my flaws, my fears too. How is it that sometimes the negative voices seem to drown out the positive ones?"

"I don't know. You tell me," Kris urged, eager to hear Adam's voice, his thoughts. 

"I read once... "Adam took a sip of coffee while thinking. "Well, not once. _Recently._ I was reading for a reason, recently. Trying to understand how I screwed up. I've been talking to people or rather, people have been talking to me..."

"People?"

"Okay. My parents, mostly. And my best friend, Dani and my brother, Neil. They've been talking to me and Neil jumped on how my default is insecurity. My father read some book and it made sense. It said that we tend to remember the negative because it's our brains way of helping us survive. By telling us what to watch out for, the people to watch out for..."

"But then we turn the negativity on ourselves when the people waving the red flags are people others admire or people we're supposed to love and look up to?" Kris surmised.

"Exactly." Adam rubbed his thumb across Kris' palm. "I've worked hard in the past on overcoming my insecurities, but I need to work harder. I need people to call me on my shit, but in the end I own my fears and have to vanquish them."

"We're all a work in progress." Kris smiled. Vanquish? What a word. Old-fashioned but felt good on the tongue. He'd have to use that in a song. "I know I am. Just when you think you're complete, you find another missing puzzle piece."

"What's your missing piece?"

"My fears. And I'm not sure if that's my missing piece, because honestly... sometimes I feel like they've consumed me. And... for a while, my fear of abandonment and conflict caused me not to tell someone I love very much an important truth. Or rather, my sin of failing to tell the truth made that truth way more important than mebbe it had to be."

"Why do you have these fears?"

"Because my worst nightmare came true. My family, most of my friends, my church home -- they all turned on me when they found out I was gay. Threw me away. Just like I'd expected. I'd hidden it for years... I learned how to keep myself hidden, how to keep secrets for a long time. Keeping secrets became second nature. It became normal. And that's..." Kris looked Adam in the eyes. "That's wrong. A person deserves to be able to show who he is and the people you love deserve the honor of the truth."

Nodding, Adam drank from his cup. "I was afraid too, initially. But then when my parents... well, they always knew, they tell me. I was lucky -- when I told them, there was only relief that the truth was out." He took another sip. "So I learned a different lesson. Then, anyway. That the truth will not hurt, but will make everyone happy." 

"You're very lucky that's the lesson you learned."

"I know it," Adam agreed. "I was lucky. My parents were the best. They supported me in every way possible. They were and are, still, to this day, my safety net, my safe place to crash land. Sure, they'll poke and prod me out of self-pity or to work harder, but I know deep in my heart, that they'll always love me. No matter what." He paused and opened his hand, palm up, on the marble top of the table. "People have said I'm generous with love. I suppose that's why it's easy for me to be generous. Love has always been inexhaustible in my family." 

"But I've heard..." Kris paused and trailed his fingers along the bones of Adam's hand. Strong hand that had held his heart and a baby with equal care. Until... "You've been disappointed in love."

"I was. It shocked me, you know? And it taught me different lessons. To be cautious, distrusting. To wait for the other shoe to drop. And then it dropped again a second time. So you just wait for it again. Because life has patterns, right? Not just coincidences, but patterns, because we think there hast to be some meaning to it, rather than just bad luck. So you wait and maybe... set up a self-fulfilling prophecy. You don't see red flags. You ignore problems. But you're waiting."

"Just like me. Back there." Kris gestured over his shoulder, then batted the orange feather impatiently. Seeing the faint traces of orange glitter on his hand he rubbed his palm on his thigh, then took Adam's hand again.

That felt so right, Adam thought, looking down at their hands. He reached with his left and enfolded Kris' smaller hand in both of his, then closed his eyes, savoring the contact. This was the way it should be. All of the crooked paths and dead ends had ended up leading them straight here, where they should be. In a coffeshop telling each other their stories and falling in love. 

How could he not love Kris? How? He was irresistible. Especially with that ridiculous hat with the orange feather and glitter, which he'd clearly found and worn to prove the depth of his love. He opened his mouth to tell Kris that they could just skip all the steps and go back to the hotel because -- well, sex. Sex was good. And--

Kris had tilted his head as he watched Adam think, then wanting to plow through the fertile field of his past, continued, "The whole sorry truth is that I fled out to LA, flailed and floundered, ended up homeless for a while. I was..." Kris took a deep breath, then looking into Adam's warm eyes, smiled. Adam could take the truth. Why hadn't he ever realized that before? Fear. No more fear. "I was willing to have sex to get a place to sleep and a breakfast in the morning. I tried it once."

"And then what?"

"Couldn't do it again. The pain here..." Kris pointed to his chest. "Hurt more than the pain here." He pointed to his stomach. "Maybe it was just my pride that hurt. I don't know. But I know I was sinking fast. Then the guy who runs this dive bar took me in, cleaned me up, gave me a job."

"So like your fellow southerner Blanche DuBois, you were able to rely on the kindness of strangers."

"Yeah." Kris looked down at the pastry, then picked it up and took a bite without noticing the taste. Nothing would taste good until he could taste Adam's lips again. "I...I learned in those two years that you don't have to be Christian or believe in God at all to do good works. That morality and kindness and love aren't the property of those who've memorized the Bible but forgotten the meaning. I think though that I also learned some really bad lessons."

"Like what?" Adam prompted, pushing the second pastry toward Kris. 

Watching Adam slide the pastry toward him, realizing suddenly that Adam always did that, always tried to give him what he needed, Kris began eating it. "I learned that love can be taken away, that it's a scarce commodity, like food." 

Sitting up straight, Adam looked from the pastry Kris had nearly inhaled to his hands. "Or money, right?" Kris nodded and Adam touched his hand. 

"I..." Kris licked is lower lip nervously, then forged ahead. "Ya know, I live in California where seems like everyone has a therapist and my friends, this guy who's like a father to me, he and his wife? They urged me to see a therapist to get an outside opinion from someone who mebbe knew about the consequences of being homeless and hungry. And she -- the therapist -- said that people who have been hungry like me, have a tendency to hoard. Because they have a terrible fear of being hungry again."

"Like Scarlett O'Hara?" Adam asked, thinking of the movie, how so much of the character's life had been governed by that fear. 

"Yes. As God is my witness, I'll never be hungry again." Kris nodded. "And for me, I also... I also..." He froze and heard his own breath rasping through his parted lips.

"Go on. I'm listening."

"She helped me to see that I had another kind of hunger, way worse."

"For love?" Adam asked softly when Kris fell silent. He took both of Kris' hands in his and pressed hard enough that Kris gasped and looked up. "For love?"

Kris breathed in. "Yes. I was so hungry for it. But I was afraid of being alone again. So when I found love, I fell into old patterns to try and keep it."

"Old patterns are easy. Comfortable. Even when they're not healthy."

"Yes!" Kris nodded. "What were yours?"

"I know I seem confident and--"

"Glamorous? Amazing. A sex god?"

Adam burst out laughing. "I hope, right? Truth is, underneath, there's still a little part of me that's the overweight Opie I was in high school. So I have insecurity -- shit I need to work on -- due to high school and trust issues because I had two bad experiences with exes who humiliated me publicly."

"The tiny dic pic?" Kris asked with a smile.

"Oh, no, you know about that?" Adam shook his head. That was one chink in his armor that Kris had helped him fill in long ago. A happy difference from their first meeting in a coffeeshop.

"I'm more than willing for you to prove to me that it's all a lie. Over and over."

"Have I mentioned how much I like a guy who's a slut for me?"

"Why, no. But then again, who wouldn't?"

"Excellent point." Adam grinned back. But he was going to be a grown-up and force himself to ignore his dick and focus on tearing down all the layers to reveal the truth. Because he was a grown-up. Then again, the way Kris was licking his lips clean of the sugar from the little cake was so damn hot, he could imagine those lips and that tongue on the head of his cock and... Down, boy. Damn, it sucked being a grown-up. "But your fear, what happened? Because something happened. Fear always causes shit to happen. Fear is dangerous. I know it. Fear leads to anger or running away."

"You're not kiddin'." Kris sighed. "But fear doesn't cause it. We have to own it, right?"

"You're right," Adam agreed. "We all need to be captains of our own ship." 

"Totally." Kris nodded, then took a deep breath. "So. I was afraid of being rejected and yet set myself up for it. A self-fulfilling prophecy. I did it by doing what I knew best. I held tight to my fear. I kept secrets. I hoarded truth."

"Ahh..." Adam breathed out. This moment, that revelation made his forced patience all worth it.

They sat there for a long moment, staring at each other, just breathing.

"I was trying to protect myself. But you can't do that with love. It's like..." Kris looked down into his coffee cup, seeing the dark liquid within as if it were this swimming hole back in Arkansas. "It's like... when you're on a rope above a swimming hole. If you want to get into the water, at a certain point you just gotta take the chance and let go of the rope and jump in." 

"And then when you're falling towards the water, you either have a heart attack or you have the faith that you're going to hit the water safely, that it will buoy you up?"

"Exactly." Kris sighed and smiled. Adam understood him. He always had. "Are you ready to jump in too?"

"If..." Adam paused, then once again squeezed Kris' hands. "If you'll hold my hand, I'll jump too. Or... I mean, I'll hold your hand and I'll hold on. Forever. I'll never push, I'll only pull you closer. I promise, promise. I've learned hard lessons. I won't ever make that mistake again. I'll _never_ let you go."

Blinking back sudden tears, Kris looked down at their joined hands. "I want to bind us together forever. In every way possible."

"Greedy?"

"Needy. I admit it. I'm old fashioned and I want a legal marriage. And since we're laying it all out. revealing all?" Kris smiled. "I want a family. At least two kids."

"Hmm. It _has_ to be two or four. You can't have three." 

"Why not?" Kris asked in surprise. Adam had gone from only wanting one child to suggesting more? 

"The Jan Brady syndrome. I've been sitting on my mom's couch feeling sorry for myself, watching TV Land and learned that lesson too!" Adam looked down to hide his smile, then continued, "We already have a start on that. My best friend, Dani and I, I mean. Luckily, we have a child together. The most talkative little girl in the world. The busiest little girl. We could definitely use help with her. And of course, every child can use more love. Her name is Emmaline."

Kris whispered, "That's a pretty name."

"I'm pretty sure you'd love her to pieces." Adam smiled and lifted Kris' hand to his mouth. 

Closing his eyes momentarily to savor the feel of Adam's lips against his palm, Kris whispered, "I'm pretty sure I want you to love me until I shatter to pieces in your arms."

Adam's lips parted in surprise and then he smiled, threw some money down on the table and reached for Kris' hand to pull him from the restaurant. 

"My backpack!" Kris squawked, reaching down for it. That ring, he wasn't losing it now. He had a proposal to make and if Venice wasn't the most romantic place to propose in the world, he'd eat his hat, feather and all. "And hey I was supposed to pay--"

"Later. I'm on a mission." Adam tugged Kris out the door and down the shallow steps.

"What sort of mission?" Kris asked, holding his hat on with his free hand as they hurried down and a gust of wind ruffled his feather. 

"To love you to pieces--" Adam bit off his words as they ground to a halt as they nearly toppled into a sea of costumes crowding the piazza. "Well, hell. I can improvise." He shrugged, pulled off his hat, tugged off Kris' and laughed as orange glitter fell around them. "Like this." He held onto both hats and wrapped his arms around Kris, then bent his head and swooped in for a kiss.

Immediately tilting his head back and parting his lips, Kris dug his fingers into Adam's shoulders and held on. He wasn't letting Adam go either. He was going to fight with everything in him to hold on forever. He pressed up, on tiptoes, against Adam's body, wiggling closer as their lips met and clung and their mouths opened, uncaring of who might see, because the only important sense was feeling. Feeling how their mouths connected as their hearts melded together once more.

 

Holding onto Adam's hand as Adam turned confidently down a narrow empty passageway, the sound of their booted footsteps echoing on the stone walkway, Kris asked, "How do you know where you're going?"

"Little known fact. My cock is a navigational tool."

Kris burst out laughing and had to stop to clutch his stomach. He bent forward and rested his head against Adam's chest. 

"You doubt me?" Adam asked in mock dismay, pulling Kris towards him and bending down to plunder his smiling mouth, while rubbing their bodies together. Kris raised his leg and began to straddle Adam's thigh as Adam shoved his hardening cock against Kris.

"Oh damn, I want you inside me."

"See? My cock knows where to go."

"Prove it," Kris challenged, pulling back and then giving Adam a small shove. "Get me to the hotel and prove it."

 

"Ah, Signor Lambert! You have found him!" The doorman exclaimed with a wide smile as Adam and Kris hurried through the wide doors. 

"Yes, you said I would find him, that when someone is destined for you, no one can take him from you. _Grazie_ ," Adam said politely, while grinding his teeth. He was glad the cape hid his erection. Damn, the capes weren't just fun to wear, they were practical too! 

"We did!" The bellman added as he walked past them to grab a cart. "As I said, _Chi cerca trova._ "

"What does that mean?" Kris asked. "Charoni the boatman said the same thing."

"Charoni?" The doorman asked abruptly. "It...uh... means..."

"Seek and you shall find," Adam answered. 

"How do you know that?"

"I asked." Adam shrugged. The staff had been sympathetic when he'd been trying to find Kris, but kept firing Italian at him and he'd asked what they were saying.

"Ask and it shall be given to you, seek and you shall find...Mark Seven--" Kris paused, then smiled as he heard the bells from St. Mark's ring out again. He took Adam's hand again and closed his eyes in acknowledgement of the wisdom of Mark's Gospel just as the bells of St. Mark's rang out, the bells that had led him to the Piazza and straight into Adam's arms. This was his path, this was his place. _Mio destino._

"Well, then I'm asking if you can hustle your ass across this lobby so I can bury my navigational tool inside it," Adam urged, his lips brushing against Kris' ear as he bent under Kris' hat.

Kris laughed and smiled at the staff as Adam pulled him towards the elevator, the feathers in their hats bobbing with their steps.

The doorman sighed and snapped his fingers at janitor flirting with the receptionist at the desk. He pointed to the faint traces of orange glitter on the mosaic floor and muttered, " _Carnevale stregoneria_..." 

"You found him!" The elevator operator announced with a grin, then patted Adam on the back. "We knew you would! You had to have faith. _Quella destinata per te, nessuno la prenderà."_

"What's that mean?" Kris asked, rocking back and forth on his heels impatiently as the elevator guy seemed more interested in talking than making the damn elevator move. Geez Louise, didn't he realize that Kris hadn't seen Adam naked in two months and he was gonna die?! And Adam's damn cape was covering the view of his ass in leather pants, which should be a crime and... Hmm, the capes hid a lot... Hmm. He wanted to touch Adam and it never hurt to let Adam feel how much Kris wanted him. He hid his smile behind Adam's shoulder as he slid his hand under Adam's cape and let it roam, suppressing a giggle when Adam froze.

"True love waits," the elevator man supplied and pressed the large, ornate button and the ornate cage of an antique elevator lurched to life with a clanging creak and slowly rose.

 

 

"Adammmm! Hurry!" Kris nearly yelled as he and Adam stumbled over each other in their haste to get into the room and close the door. He tossed his backpack to the floor and they pulled off their hats and flung them aside. "I've waited long enough and--"

"You're in so much trouble, teasing me like that," Adam warned, sliding his hand over Kris' leather-covered butt and then between his legs. He pulled back to push his cock against Kris' ass and shoved him against the door. "I want--" 

"Yessss!" Kris moaned as Adam thrust against his ass, pushing him into the door, his own hard cock rubbing against the hard wood. "Or wait, I need to feel you--" He twisted around in the circle of Adam's arms and hurriedly groped for Adam's zipper, groaning when his hands encountered nothing more than hair-roughened skin and oh yeah. He shoved forward to straddle Adam's bent leg and ground against his thigh muscles while his fingers searched, then found what he wanted. "Damn, your cock is so hard... It's been too long."

Throwing his head back, Adam moaned as Kris' mouth descended on his neck and his fingers circled his cock and pumped. "We're going to ruin the leather. We need to at least get out of these pants..." 

"What?" Kris blinked in confusion as his body just kept grinding on Adam's leg, seeking more friction.

"We need to get out of our pants," Adam groaned, reaching for the zipper on Kris' pants, only to realize that there were lacings instead. And the damn sword was in the way. "Wow, these are really hot and I appreciate the idea and later I'll want to know where you got them, but for now..."

"Don't rip them! We can have fun later!" Kris protested, laughing, then groaning as Adam's nimble fingers made quick work of the laces and his hands slid inside. "Oh damn, this isn't gonna take--"

"Not yet, the leather!" Adam protested, laughing himself as he unbuckled Kris' belt, curled his fingers around the waistband of the leather trousers and shoved them down, the sword clattering against the door, then the floor. 

"And the capes!" Kris released the collar clasp on his cape and dropped it to the floor, then reached for Adam's just as Adam succeeded in pulling off his boots. "How did you do that so fast?" Kris gaped as Adam stood before him naked, while he still wore his shirt?"

"Backstage costume changes, remember?" Adam asked, stepping forward so that he could pull Kris into his arms, his hands sliding up under the loose-fitting shirt to squeeze Kris' ass as their mouths met in hungry desire. 

"I can get into fast right now..." Kris gasped when Adam finally lifted his mouth so they could breathe. "Or you can get--"

"Good. 'Cause I can't wait any longer." Grabbing a fistful of silky white fabric in his hand, Adam shoved the shirt up over Kris' hips and pushed him back against the door. He knelt, bent forward and opened his lips, hungrily sucking Kris' cock into mouth.

Kris cried out in surprise, immediately thrusting his hardness into the wet sucking softness of Adam's mouth, groaning as he realized he was held by Adam's hand and the door, but the willing bondage of need was enough to keep him locked into place. He looked down and bit his lip as he watched the curved fullness of Adam's lips slide up and down his cock. 

Threading his trembling hands with traces of orange glitter into Adam's thick hair, Kris wiggled as best he could, then gasped when Adam pushed him harder against the door, making it thud softly against its jamb. "Adammm... the door, someone's gonna hear."

Pulling back enough to lick the tip of Kris' cock, Adam looked up, then smiled. "Who cares? I don't care if everyone knows you belong to me. You do, don't you?"

"I do..." Kris agreed, groaning loudly as Adam's tongue flicked behind his cock head as Adam kept looking at him, his eyes darkened to a deeper blue with lust, the need and love within almost hypnotic in their intensity. Kris gasped as Adam took him deeper and deeper, his tongue swirling and mouth sucking, until he cried out, still looking down into Adam's eyes and then felt his knees give out, trusting that Adam would catch him.

"Gotcha..." Adam said, licking his lower lip as he held onto Kris and pulled him down on top of him, shivering as the silky billows of Kris' shirt slid against his own over-sensitized flesh. "I need you--"

"Yes, yes..." Kris agreed instantly, scooting up Adam's body to take his mouth in a hungry kiss, groaning when he tasted himself on Adam's tongue. Oh hell, that was always so hot, he thought as his own tongue swept into that talented mouth. Feeling Adam thrusting against him, but unwilling to stop touching long enough to get lube, Kris slid down Adam's body in a rush, nipping and biting at the exposed skin, smiling when Adam growled at the bite to his nipple before letting out a deep groan when Kris slid between his legs and licked a line down over his hipbone. It was Kris' turn to moan when Adam put his hand on the back of Kris' neck and gently pushed him onto his cock.

"Take me, show me," Adam demanded, angling up on one elbow while his hand stayed on the back of Kris' neck with his thumb on Kris' cheek, the way Kris liked. He arched his neck back as Kris' mouth finally enclosed his cock and gasped as he felt the outline of his cock against Kris' cheek. "Hurry up..." he pleaded, thrusting up into Kris' mouth, straightening his neck so he could watch the glossy redness of Kris' lips encasing his cock, taking him higher and higher, until with a thrust that made them both gasp, he forgot they were on the floor, forgot they were anywhere but in each other's arms, the place and time irrelevant when they were touching. 

 

"I love you..." Adam whispered against Kris' lips as they lay on their sides facing each other on the floor. " _I_ said it first this time."

"I think I like this do over." Kris smiled and nuzzled his face into the crook of Adam's neck and shoulder. "In an hour we went from meeting and having coffee to having sex to saying I love you."

"An hour?" Adam chuckled. Kris really did have no sense of time. "You haven't said it yet."

"Are you pouting?" Kris laughed, then kissed his way up Adam's neck, over his jaw and then pressed a series of quick kisses on the pout, interspersed with whispered, "I love yous." 

Adam laughed when in the middle of a kiss, Kris' stomach grumbled. "You gobbled up those two little cakes and you're still hungry?"

"They weren't dump cake," Kris complained. "Can we call room service? Because now that I've got you naked, we're not leaving this room for a while. Like say, forever."

"Sure." Adam nudged Kris and they stood up, looking for the phone. "Hey, wait. We didn't notice before." He pointed to a small table near the window, set with a bottle of wine, cheese, and some fruit.

"How..." Kris began as they walked towards it.

"Lane." Adam smiled as he uncorked the bottle of wine and poured it into the two glasses. "I bet Lane."

"Whatever you pay her is not enough," Kris noted as Adam sat down and he immediately sat on his lap. "Is it the right time for wine? Not too early?"

"No. Besides it's Venice. The hotel had chocolate cheesecake for breakfast."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. I like Venice. Tomorrow morning I'm going to eat chocolate cheesecake off of your chest. Now, let's feed you." Adam leered. "Because you'll need to keep up your strength."

"My--- Eep!" Kris squeaked as Adam took a drink with one hand and his other hand sneaked under the hem of his shirt and cupped his balls. "I...uh..." He groaned as Adam's middle finger dipped behind his balls and began teasing his hole. "Don't think I'll have any trouble keeping anything _uuupppp_!" He squeaked again as Adam put his right middle finger into his mouth and removed it wet with wine and moved it between Kris' legs. Spreading his legs wide, Kris angled his hips up and stared at Adam with wide eyes. "I..."

"Eat." Adam ordered. "Your stomach growled. Eat."

"But you--"

"I can't fondle you and eat at the same time. I need to set priorities. I'm easily distractible."

"No. You're not!" Kris laughed, then groaned as Adam's finger gently breached him and slid inside with slow, measured touches. "You're incredibly focused."

"Well, right now I'm focused on opening you up. It's going to take a while..." Adam closed his eyes and counted to ten. Kris was so damn tight, it was going to be reminiscent of their first time. "So eat." 

"But..."

"I'll stop touching you if you don't start eating," Adam warned, pulling his hand away.

"Bossy, domineering..." Kris muttered, picking up the glass of wine with one hand and fruit with the other. He looked over at Adam and smiled, then in a whisper added, "And I love it." He ate the fruit and drank the wine, then some more as they sat cuddled on the chair, his legs rubbing against Adam's as Adam's hand cupped and fondled and his finger teased.

"I know. Thank god." Adam bent his head and with his nose, pushed away the collar of Kris' shirt, to softly lick Kris' neck while gently pushing his finger inside Kris' tight ring, warming from the inside out as Kris gasped and instantly pushed back hard and fast. "That's one aspect of my personality that's just in my nature."

Wiggling against Adam's naked thighs and feeling Adam's cock rising against his hip, Kris winked. Pouring more wine for himself, he told him, "I like you all natural." 

"Speaking of which, why are you still in your shirt?" Adam complained, tugging at it with his free hand.

Pushing Adam's hand away, Kris shook his head. "I like my shirt. I feel like a pirate. Avast, me hearties! I need my hat and sword, though." 

"How much wine have you drunk?" Laughing, Adam picked up his own glass and finished it off. Clearly, he needed to catch up. Then again, Kris was a lightweight when it came to alcohol. 

"You haven't drunk enough! It's really good! Sweet. Not as sweet as you, though." Kris lifted his mouth and smiled when Adam immediately bent down for a soft kiss that went on and on. 

"Love you," Adam said against Kris' lips. "So much. Do you know--"

"I know," Kris confirmed. He poured more wine into Adam's glass and shoved it towards him. "Drink up. I can wiggle myself around on your finger."

"Fuuuuckkkk..." Adam groaned as the image instantly played in his mind, of Kris fucking himself on Adam's fingers. 

"Not yet. But soon..." Kris promised, tipping the base of the glass back until Adam drank. 

"Soon?" Adam finished his wine and put it down on the table with a thud. "Let's start soon." 

"Goody." Kris waited.

"Well, aren't you going to get up?"

"Aren't you going to fuck me in the chair?"

"I don't think it can handle it." Adam nodded towards the carved gilt arms. He'd already cased the room for likely places to have sex and this chair was not included in the list. 

"True. It looks a little... " Kris wrinkled his nose. "Dainty. Now, see? This is where my fantabulous sturdy comfy multitasking chair comes in handy." 

"Dear god, I'm about to lose my erection," Adam muttered. "That damn chair. Get in bed."

"What about the wine?"

"I'll bring it with." Withdrawing his finger, Adam gave Kris a nudge, then slapped his ass when he stood up.

Rubbing his butt and managing to pull his shirt up accidentally on purpose, Kris grinned when Adam gave it an appreciative stare. "What was that for?"

Shaking his head, Adam pointed to the bed. "Pay attention. The lights a little hazy in here. There are stairs leading up to the bed."

"I'm gonna trip over them when I don't have my glasses or contacts."

"Do you want me to carry you?" Adam smiled and touched Kris' cheek, then rubbed his thumb along his lower lip. "I will. Because I don't need a sword or hat to know that I found my treasure. And I'm never letting go again. I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe and close."

"Oh..." Kris put his hand over his heart, then flung his arms around Adam, giving him a tight hug. Pulling back quickly, Kris sniffed. "You don't need to carry me. Humph. I'm not a damsel in distress."

"You don't need me to storm the castle? Because I will," Adam said softly. "Whatever you need."

Kris started. That old guy had said the same thing. Oh. Adam must have made some comment to him. He smiled. "Do you have your battering ram?"

"Give me some more kisses and my ram will be ready to breach you."

"Well, when you put it that way," Kris teased, scurrying up the steps and flinging himself on the huge bed. He broke into laughter when he slid across the slippery coverlet and had to grab onto the fabric to keep from sliding off the bed.

"God, I missed this," Adam whispered, following more carefully since he was carrying the wine. He set it down on the bedside table and pulled the coverlet down, before sitting in front of a pillow. "C'mere." Adam pulled Kris on top of him, smiling when Kris straddled his hips and nudged against his cock. "I want to kiss you."

"We're gonna make out?" Kris wiggled closer as Adam's hands once again slid under the shirt. One hand cupped his ass, while the other moved up his spine to circle the back of his neck. He shivered with rising excitement as Adam held him in place, loving how Adam was holding him in his place, on top of Adam, in his lap. Holding on, not letting go. 

Adam licked his lips as he stared at Kris' mouth. "Yeah. A do over, right?"

"Why? We never got sex wrong!"

"Are you objecting to kissing me?"

"I--" Kris began to argue, then laughed. "There's stubborn, then there's stupid. I'm not stupid." He leaned forward, wrapping his arms around Adam's neck as their mouths met.

"No," Adam agreed some time later when they gasped for air and picked up their wine again to parch their thirst. Kissing the wine-wet lips of the man he loved, Adam said softly, "No. You're my treasure." 

 

"Mmm..." Adam pulled back, resting his head against the padded headboard and raising one hand to brush his thumb over the swollen plumpness of Kris' bottom lip. Only lifting his gaze away from that enticement because he wanted to see the look Kris always got in his eyes after they'd kissed for a long time, he smiled. There it was. That dazed, loving look, like he couldn't believe it either. "I love it when you look like this."

"Like what?" Kris asked, bending forward to press a firm kiss on Adam's lips, wanting to taste the happiness. "Like you look? Happy and like you can't believe it?"

"That's the one." Curling his hand around Kris' neck, Adam used his thumb go tilt Kris' jaw up, then flicked the thumb against his bottom lip, pressing it open. "There, just like that. Open for me." 

His heart thumping, Kris swept his tongue out, sweeping against Adam's thumb. He bent his head down and sucked the thumb inside, watching the heat flare in Adam's eyes. Good. "I'm always open for you. Just take--" Kris lost his words and his train of thought when Adam's wet thumb once again pressed his bottom lip down and his mouth swooped down and then in, his tongue sliding firmly against Kris', the confident possession making Kris' cock harden and his heart pound. Tilting his head back, he rubbed himself against Adam.

With one hand still wrapped around Kris' neck and the other squeezing Kris' ass, Adam lifted his head to say, "I will never ever get tired of the way you wiggle on me. Especially when we kiss like this. I could do it all day. Remember, when we were first going out?" 

"Blue balls? Yeah, I remember them. This do over business?" Kris asked, his voice breathless. "Are we gonna do over the beginning when you were some Victorian keeper of your virtue or--"

"Told you before. While we were texting, so you have written proof that I was stupid." Adam bit down the length of Kris' neck, smiling against the taut warm skin when Kris shivered against his teeth. "I'm going to undress you and get inside you so deep you'll forget we were ever apart."

Kris froze at Adam's words, then groaned as he felt a flash of heat so sharp and strong it was like fire had ignited his loins. He began grinding down on Adam's cock. "I think I just came a little."

"Unacceptable. I need you to come a lot." 

"Not a problem. That door situation?" Kris blushed and nodded toward the door to their suite. "Just took the edge off. It's been a while, ya know." 

Smiling, Adam kissed Kris' rosy lips. "Me too." 

"Really?" Kris knew his tone was incredulous, but Adam had always had such a high sex drive. "I know we said no sexting and I said I wanted us to hold off on jerking off until we were together again, but... really?" 

"Really." Knowing what Kris was really asking, Adam explained. "I wasn't unfaithful to you, hedgehog. At first... well, Neil was glued to me. And believe it or not, I had no...urge, then..." Biting his lip, Adam confided, "That's not quite the truth, Kris. I owe you the truth too. I... when I thought you'd been with me because you were paid to, it tapped into my insecurities."

"God, I'm so sorry!" Kris whispered, his voice low and filled with remorse. He squared his shoulders, determined that he'd find a way to make it up to Adam or help him see that it was time to move past those roadblocks. 

"I know you are. And then, I was still angry, but then... I started to remember all of the good times-- and there were so many. Endless memories and I started to laugh remembering and then I wanted... But every time I touched myself, I saw you. You were..."

"You were my fantasy too. Always have been, always will be," Kris asserted. He had an idea about how to make Adam feel that in his heart of hearts. But later. 

"Me too." Adam shook his head. "Pissed me off, at first, like I had no control over my thoughts, but... it was always you. It took me a while, too long...there was something inside me that was...telling me to wait, some sixth sense, maybe? Or just pure stubbornness? Because I didn't want to give you up. I wanted you back. I just needed a way back and you gave it to me."

"Hmm..." Kris smiled in what he hoped was a reassuring way, his own senses telling him that Adam was still beating himself up for his anger. "Well, it was my fault you lost your way, but I had a sixth sense or stubbornness too, I think. Because I, well..." He smirked, then smiled as he leaned forward to kiss Adam once again, both of them sighing happily as their lips touched. "Well, that means we have a lot of time to make up for, so how about we hurry it up a little?"

"I don't think so. I want to slow down, remember this moment..." Smiling into Kris' eyes, Adam realized Kris had...what was that? "You have a secret?" he asked, feeling a frisson of anxiety, then forcefully tamping it down. Don't be a paranoid fool, beat those fears down, he told himself. 

"A good one," Kris explained quickly seeing the flicker of fear Adam had almost instantly forced away. He shivered at the show of willpower and determination and knew he'd been right to make this choice. "Undress me already. And then you can see the secret..."

Raising an eyebrow at Kris' obvious excitement, Adam kept his eyes on Kris' face as he unbuttoned one tight shirt cuff, then the other, before moving to the bottom button on the shirt placket, slowly moving up. "I'm not going to hurry. You're my gift. I want to take my time unwrapping you." 

"I swear to god, you make me _nutso_ butso!" Kris exclaimed, impatiently pushing Adam's hands aside, grabbing the hem of the shirt and pulling it over his head, then tossing it backward. The soft swish of the silky material hitting the satin of the coverlet echoed the shocked hiss of Adam's breath.

Clamping his hands on Kris' waist, then dragging them up Kris' torso until they framed Kris' pectoral muscles, Adam licked his lips and asked in a hoarse voice, "Kris. What is that?"

"This?" Kris grinned. "Well, actually it's a belated birthday present."

"You got me a nipple ring as a birthday present?" Adam stared at the hoop, about the diameter of a nickle, through Kris' right nipple, that matched the pale silver tone of the platinum of the ring Kris had not yet given him. But he'd given him this one. Oh hell yeah. He groaned and pushed his cock up against the smooth softness of Kris' balls and then slid back and forth. 

A soft sound escaping his lips as Adam's cock teased against his hole, Kris hurried to explain, "Maybe it's a combined birthday and Valentine's Day present. You talked about it enough times over the years--"

"Joking," Adam said quickly, still staring at the ring in shock. 

"Someone jokes enough times about somethin', they mean it. You wanted it. And... for me, maybe it was my way of wearin' a ring for you. Binding myself to you. I think it's--"

"So. Fucking. Hot." Adam stared, unable to look away from the sight of the ring piercing Kris' nipple. His. All of Kris was his, including that ring. That was going in his mouth right now--

Kris bit his lip as Adam pressed his fingers and hand up into his rib cage and curled Kris' torso up so that his nipple was pointing toward Adam's mouth. Just as Adam bent, Kris blurted out, "And you haven't even seen the inscription yet."

"Inscription?" Adam gently lifted the ring and tilted it so that the pearlescent light filtering in through the wavering glass could illuminate the script. " _Adam's_..." He gasped, slowly looking up and felt his head swim for a moment from the heat flushing through his body. "You put my name on your nipple ring? You put my name on your nipple ring? You--"

"Yeah. Thought you'd -- Oh!" Kris cried out as Adam's hands around his rib cage tightened, pulled him forward and Adam's hot mouth descended on his nipple, sucking hard. Adam's lower lip slid down over the nipple ring, again and again, then he tugged on it with his teeth.

Feeling Kris shudder against his mouth as Kris gasped in obvious pleasure, Adam groaned. Kris had always had sensitive nipples and now? He flattened his tongue against the ring, then slowly dragged it up, pulling the ring up and over the top of the nipple, then down, then repeated it when he felt the muscles under his hands tighten and the skin heat. 

"So fucking hot," Adam murmured, before tugging gently on the ring with his teeth again. 

"Damn, thought this was my gift to you," Kris groaned as he watched Adam's mouth on his nipple and the tug sent red flashes of need straight to his cock. He thrust his hips forward, his wet cock head sliding against Adam's stomach, over and over as Adam's lips and tongue played with his nipple. Oh damn, he had heard that the piercing could make nipples even more sensitive and day-umm... He heard himself moan and pushed his hands through Adam's hair, holding his head close and pushing his chest into Adam's mouth. "More, more, more..." 

"Mine, mine, mine..." Adam growled, his tongue flicking up and down against Kris' hard nipple. He slid one hand up to tease the other with his fingers and shoved the other down Kris' stomach to circle his cock, slid his fingers through the wetness and began pumping him. The man needed to be rewarded for this gift. "You had this done when we were separated -- you had faith?" He asked before resuming playing with his new toy with his mouth, his teeth scraping over the hardened point while his lower lip played with the ring. He smiled against Kris' flesh, when Kris arched his back to shove more of himself into Adam's mouth. 

"Or hope? I dunno. I guess, maybe, it was my way of havin' a reminder to have faith that I was yours... Always would be." Kris paused to gather his thoughts as Adam's mouth made him lose his mind. "Damn. Adammmm...." He moaned and thrust harder into Adam's hand. "That I was yours, meant to be yours, that all the roads you'd taken, I'd taken, we'd taken, even when they diverged..."

"That they'd circle back together..." Adam finished, sliding his hand wet with Kris' own pre-come under Kris' balls and circling his hole. 

"Together..." Kris shuddered, his brain on overload as Adam's mouth teased his nipple and his finger teased his hole. "We need to be together. Inside. Inside me... Please..." 

"As you wish," Adam said teasingly. He reached behind him for the lube he'd hidden under the pillows when he had tallied up all the potential fucking locations in the room. "You are so mine..." He flipped open the cap of the tube. "Play with your nipple ring until I'm done prepping you."

"But..." Kris argued, just to hear Adam say --

" _Do it._ " 

God, he loved it when Adam got bossy in bed. Shivering with eagerness, Kris raised his right hand to his nipple and began flicking it back and forth, watching Adam watch him. Adam looked entranced. And really hot. He licked his lips. Oh yeah, this gift to Adam was a gift to him too.

"Spread your legs a little," Adam ordered, keeping his eyes on Kris' fingers, now tugging on the ring. He grinned when Kris complied, then grabbed Adam's wrist and shoved his hand between his legs. "Impatient?"

"If I don't get your cock inside me soon, I'm gonna come--"

"The only reason you coming just from playing with your nipple would be a bad thing would be off I weren't the one playing with your nipple. Although, given how hot it is to watch you do it?" Adam shrugged, then slid his hand back and pushed two slippery fingers inside Kris' body. "Who cares? There's always tomorrow..." 

"Oh yeah..." Kris froze at the welcome invasion, then wiggled, pushing down and pulling harder on the nipple ring as he saw the amazed lust on Adam's face. 

"Good god, I could watch this all night," Adam whispered in awe, pushing his fingers in deeper until he felt the spot and then held his breath when Kris jerked in response and began a low-pitched moan. "Show me what you want." 

"Reveal....?" Kris asked, his voice a low rasp. Raising up, Kris pulled Adam's hand out of him and shoved that hand on his ass, while he positioned himself over Adam's cock. "I want this..." He pushed down, groaning as Adam's hard cock filled and after time apart, stretched him, the pleasure almost a pain, but so so sweet. He ground down, wanting to feel more and more... "And this..." Curling his hands around Adam's neck, he pulled Adam's mouth to his nipple. "Take it. It's yours. I'm yours. Always." 

Raising his knees and once again curling his hands around Kris' rib cage, Adam pushed Kris back to rest against his thighs. He looked down at his cock inside Kris' body and thrust once, twice, relishing in the soft, keening sound Kris made and the way he wiggled his ass onto Adam's cock, clearly needy. But not needy enough. Raising his hand, he pulled on the nipple ring, watching Kris freeze, then arch his back for me. Still not enough. Adam bent forward and took Kris' mouth in a hard, demanding kiss, pushing his tongue inside and groaning when Kris sucked on it, while pushing down, harder and harder, trying to get Adam deeper. 

Groaning when Adam pulled his lips away and lifted Kris' body up so that it wasn't fully filled, Kris gasped when Adam immediately opened his mouth over Kris' pierced nipple, his tongue and teeth and lips scraping and sucking, nibbling and nipping while thrusting up into Kris' tight body, over and over.

Needy and greedy for more, Kris' hands roved over Adam's shoulders and chest, then up his neck and cheeks. Adam looked up and Kris felt his nerve endings sizzle at the heat in Adam's eyes. He pressed down on Adam's shoulders and pushed his ass down, crying out in short-lived relief when Adam's cock filled him again. "Good, but--" 

"That's not enough..." Adam growled, spreading his legs and pushing Kris onto his back and thrusting inside Kris with one hard push, then another. "Need it harder, don't you?"

"Yes, yes. Feel you inside me harder, deeper, like you said..." Wrapping his arms around Adam's back, Kris planted his feet on the bed and arched up, pushing back, his cock rubbing against Adam's pelvis and stomach, knowing he was moments away from falling to pieces in Adam's arms just like he'd wanted. "I'm gonna come..." 

Watching Kris arch his neck, Adam bent his head and tongued a long lick up it, then pushed Kris' jaw down so he could feast on his mouth just to taste the moan as he hit Kris' prostate with solid aim. He felt the vibrations reverberate through Kris from the shuddering of the walls around his cock, up through Kris' body, the nipple ring heating from their flesh pressed together, to the trembling of Kris' bottom lip as he cried out against Adam's mouth. "More?" Adam asked, biting Kris' lip and pulling out, to shove back in again even harder, his hips moving faster and faster. 

"I thought you wanted to take it nice and slow?" Kris teased gaspingly, then sucked in an airless breath when Adam's cock hit his sweet spot. Banged against it hard, making his entire body stretch taut like a guitar string wound too tight. He slapped his hand against Adam's ass and cried out, "Oh god, I love you. Waited so long for this again... Don't want to miss a thing so slow down or--"

"Tomorrow. I can slow down tomorrow. I'll love you tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow..." Adam pulled out, then slammed back inside Kris, watching his eyes widen and his mouth mutter incoherent begging sounds. "Right now, I just want -- need to get as deep in you as possible. Tomorrow--" 

"Because we have all the tomorrows in the world," Kris agreed and spread his legs to pull Adam in deeper.


	60. C'era una volta

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \-- _C'era una volta,_ is Italian for "Once upon a time."  
>  \--The legend of _La Porta Verde_ is one out of my own imagination. The mystery of the green door is not one I am going to fully explain for you -- there are at least two possible explanations and you can choose the one you like best.  
>  \--The story of the prince and the goose is a real Italian folktale I adapted slightly for my purposes. The story is called _Il Denaro Fa Tutto_ (Money Can Do Anything) and is originally from Genoa. FYI -- I had long since written 99% of my own story when I came across this folktale just a few days ago before I originally posted this story and decided that it was fate/destiny/serendipity I found it and included it.

**Chapter 60: _C'era una volta_... Rating: N-17**

"So tell me all about it," Lane urged, tapping her foot impatiently as she watched Cale buy donuts in the JFK airport. "Why weren't you at the airport when Adam went to pick you up?"

"Some mix up, I guess. We haven't really talked about it. Got better things to do, if you _knoooooow_ what I mean..." Kris grinned when Lane groaned. 

"The story, if you please, without lengthy sojourns into the gutter?"

"Awww. The gutter is the best part!" Cale asked as he sat back down next to Lane. He flipped open the drinking spout on the coffee and took a long sip.

"Really? You want to hear Kris talk about how brilliant Adam's cock is?" Lane asked, arching an eyebrow.

Cale choked on his coffee, then wiped his mouth while Lane put the phone onto speaker mode.

"Well, actuallllly..." Kris drawled. "I bet Adam's gonna be talkin' about how brilliant my nipple ring is."

"Glad the pain paid off for you, dude." Cale handed a coffee to Lane. 

"I cannot even think about that." Lane shuddered. "So distract me with your story, if you please!"

"Geez, bossy much? Okay, okay. So we met in a coffee shop -- some place named Florians. The food was only okay, but it was really... pretty, I guess you'd say. In an old pretty kinda way. Not that it mattered. The point was having a do over. So we did. And I was way better dressed than I was last time."

"Like that matters, how?" Cale asked.

"Well, it doesn't. But it doesn't hurt. I had a cape on!"

"Oh, damn, why didn't you say so? The capes rock. We're totally gonna be Renaissance superhero types."

"Dear god." Lane laughed at the anticipation on Cale's face. "Kris, the story?" 

"So we met in the coffee shop -- me looking totally cool in my hat and cape and Adam lookin' like he always does, hotter than hell. And told each other our stories, our issues, our fears, our goals -- and hey, Adam now says he wants two or four kids!"

"Not three?" Lane asked.

"Jan Brady Syndrome," Cale said instantly. "I get it. And-- hold on, here's everyone else!" Cale and jumped to his feet, waving his hand in the air. 

"Hey, Lane, when is your flight due in again?" Kris asked. "So Adam and I can pick y'all up--"

"Don't be ridiculous. We can get a watertaxi. There's no need to waste your time coming for us. And we're all going to just collapse into bed straight away, anyway. Or we should and if Emmaline sees you two, she's bound to get quite wound up."

"At least let us send a boatman for you. Hey, I didn't tell you -- I met this really weird one. His name was Charoni--" He broke off as Lane began to laugh. "What's so funny?"

"You had a boatman named Charoni?" Lane laughed again. "Don't you get it?"

"Uh... no?"

"Guess the public education in Toad Suck didn't include reading Greek and Roman mythology."

"Hey, now," Cale interjected with a grin as he sat down in the midst of the rest of their party. "We may not have learned about dead Greek and Romans, but Pearline did come to school once or twice to show us her snakes."

"An admirable substitute, no doubt." Lane rolled her eyes and smiled. "But Charoni the boatman? _Charon_ the boatman carried the dead to the underworld. You had to pay him a gold coin to get passage..."

"Are you shittin' me?" Kris asked. "I had to give this Charoni dude one of my doubloons. Adam knows mythology?"

 

"I promise, Ryan. You'll get your happily ever after story," Adam agreed. He smiled as he watched Kris pace back and forth on the balcony of their room overlooking the Grand Canal before dinner. They had places to go and new surfaces in the room to christen. "But for now, will you settle for that picture I sent you?"

 

"Do you think Dadakiss' wish came true, Mama?" Emmaline asked, tired of watching all the people in the airport.

"I'm sure it did," Dani said, soothingly stroking her daughter's blonde hair. Emmaline had been worried about that wish. 

"How do you know? Did he tell you what it was? Because that's against the rules!" Emmaline noted, aghast. 

"And we all know the Lambert-Allen family is full of rule-followers." Neil rolled his eyes. 

"But it's a rule about wishing! You have to follow those rules!" Emmaline argued. "They's important!"

"They _are_ important," Neil corrected.

"See? Even UncaNeil agrees with me -- following wish rules is important." Emmaline nodded.

"Emmaline." Dani looked at her daughter sternly. "Calm down and do not argue with adults. Dadakiss did not tell me what his wish was, but I bet we all know what it was."

"Indeed, young lady." Lane held out her arms and Emmaline crawled into her lap. "I think we all know that Kris wants to be done with his time out."

"Me too!" Emmaline agreed. "Do you think he is?"

"I know he is," Lane said confidently. Kris and Adam had better be fixed for good. Trying to help set true love on the correct course was exhausting and she was hoping to be planning a wedding of her own soon. She pulled her phone out of her purse. "Look here." 

"Yeah! They kissing again!" Emmaline clapped excitedly. 

 

"Wondering what's going on in the Adam Lambert--Kris Allen story?" Giuliana asked. "And where in the world are those two? E! has the latest. Ryan, want to catch everyone up on the developments in this saga?"

"Absolutely. First off, charges have been filed against that former associate of the Lambert-Allen family who allegedly stole Kris Allen's phone and tried to extort money from Lambert to keep private information away from the media. As most of you know by now, Lambert refused to pay and the former associate did indeed sell the story to a tabloid. The story caused a rift between Lambert and Allen, a rift Allen sought to mend through a candid interview on The Tonight Show and some _interesting_ billboards here in LA."

"Those billboards were awesome! All that glitter. What a romantic gesture!" Giuliana smiled. "And what better way to rekindle a romance than escaping to Venice during the spring Carnevale season!

 

"Today, tonight, what is it, anyway?" Adam asked, long moments later as he lifted his mouth and saw the dazed expression on Kris' face.

"I don't know. Does it matter?"

"No. As long as I have you now and forever, who cares what time it is?" 

"Adammm...you're so sweet," Kris moaned, then tilted his head back as Adam's lips teased his nipple, then slid down the ring and tugged on it. He scrabbled back under the pillow. "I just want it to be five seconds from now."

"What's happening five seconds from now?"

"Your cock is going to be inside me pounding me into tomorrow." Kris held up the tube of lube and grinned. 

 

"And as you can see from this picture a fan took in Venice of Adam and Kris after their reunion...." Ryan paused and pointed to the screen behind him, which showed an Instagram picture of the two men kissing in St. Mark's Square. Ryan pointed again and another picture of Adam and Kris in a gondola appeared on screen. He concluded the teaser segment by saying, "And as you can see by the photo Adam sent to me _exclusively_ , I think a happy ending is in sight." 

 

"Hey, I just realized something. Aside from the fact that you need to bend over more often." Kris grinned late that evening --or possibly very early the next morning because he had no flipping idea what time it was. Nor did he care as he watched Adam's ass as he rubbed his foot after stubbing it on the stairs leading up to the bed. Ha, that's what Adam got for gloating that Kris had no plaid to wear for the next week. Surely, there had to be somewhere to buy a plaid shirt somewhere in Venice. 

Because he totally wanted to see Adam's face when he saw him in plaid on the Grand Canal. And the look on his face when he ripped it off and saw the nipple ring again. That nipple ring might have been his best idea. Ever. He closed the closet door now that he'd hung up the clothes in his backpack, wondering why Adam had bought him those clothes when there was already a closet full of them. Including another cape. Oh well, Adam probably thought a guy couldn't have too many capes. And they were fun to play with, to say nothing of fun to hide the evidence of him groping Adam earlier that day. 

"That stairs leading up to a bed are a really bad idea?" Adam winced and glared at the stairs.  
"No. They're a great idea. A built-in stepstool." 

"Holy shit, you're right. I can't believe I didn't see the fucking possibilities of those steps. I didn't include them on my list."

"What list?"

"I made a list of the places we could fuck in this room."

"You... Of course, you did. Where is this list?"

"On my phone."

"Not on a phone! Didn't we learn a lesson about phones?" Kris argued. 

"What? Like anyone would be shocked that I made a list of places to have sex." Adam rolled his eyes. "Besides I didn't keep the list. I sent it to Lane for back up."

"You did not."

"Why not? I owed her for sending us the food earlier."

"So you're repaying her by giving her a list of places to have sex?"

"For ideas so she and Cale could have a romantic visit. He's proposing, right?"

"Yeah, but -- I can't believe..."

"She's not my long-lost sister...person....whatever you two are. We're both adults. I figured she's appreciate the info." Adam shook his head mournfully and looked down to keep Kris from seeing his grin. Lane would slap him silly if he ever sent her a list like that. "Can't believe I didn't think of the stairs. I'm losing my touch!"

"I know. We can't be separated this long ever again because you get out of practice." Kris winked. "You know what they say? Practice makes perfect." He walked over to the steps, knelt on the middle one and wiggled his ass. "So let's practice." 

 

"Leila?" Kim began. "Have you heard from those boys?"

"I'm...um...sure they're quite busy." Leila fought to keep the laughter out of her voice. Kim Allen had come a long way over the years, but she definitely fit the mold of a parent who liked to pretend her kid was still a virgin.

"Oh. I suppose. Venice is quite the tourist spot."

"Absolutely. I'm sure they're rocking in a gondola right now." Leila bit her lip. If she believed in hell, she was fairly certain she was going there. Lucky for her, she was more likely to believe in magic or karma than in heaven or hell, which wasn't saying much considering that in her core she believed everyone made their own heaven and hell, their own magic or karma. 

"You're right. I got a text from Kris telling me that everything was okay. He was such a wreck. He kept practicing what he was going to say over and over."

"So did Adam," Leila confided. "It's a good sign that they both were so anxious about making the other one happy, don't you think?"

"Absolutely. It's when you forget about paying attention to that every day that trouble happens. I knew it was goin' to be okay when Adam called about making dump cake!"

Leila laughed. She'd sat there and watched while Adam followed Kim's instructions. "That was the best entertainment that I've had in a long time! I'm sure the cake wasn't as good as yours."

"Well, the point is that it was made with love. I'm sure it was the sweetest cake Kris has ever tasted." 

 

"I can't believe I'm having chocolate hazelnut cheesecake for breakfast," Kris mumbled, his mouth half-full, the next morning. He knew it was morning because the room steward had told him he was breakfast. He put the plate down on the bedside table and closed his eyes in ecstasy. "I can't believe we're sitting in bed eating chocolate hazelnut cheesecake for breakfast. Naked. I vote we move here."

"Mmm..." Adam nodded as he reached over, took a swipe through Kris' plate with his finger and smeared chocolate on Kris' chest. He bent down and slowly licked it off, his tongue quickly licking over Kris' nipple. 

"Wait. You said you were goin' to lick the cheesecake off of me!" Kris remembered, reaching over Adam for the plate, then freezing when Adam flicked the dangling nipple ring. "Hey..."

"Hey you..." Adam tugged on the ring, then sent it swinging, watching with fascination.

"Damn, the look on your face. What are you thinking?" Kris asked, staying still while Adam touched him. 

"I think we need to install a bigger mirror in our bedroom," Adam noted, looking up with a smile. He reached for the cheesecake and pushed Kris back. "Because I want to see your ring swinging back and forth when I fuck you from behind."

"Day-ummmm," Kris moaned as Adam leaned over him and began painting his chest and abdomen with chocolate. As Adam bent his head and slowly licked him clean, taking his time and teasing Kris with soft quick touches of his tongue until Kris was writhing under him, his nipples as hard as his cock -- which oh hell, Adam was coating that with chocolate now and he was going to lose it... He arched up into Adam's mouth, his breath rasping in his throat as he watched Adam's lips and tongue on his cock. It would only be better if there was a mirror behind him. "I've always wanted a bigger mirror, so fine with me."

"Well, if I keep eating this cheesecake, we'll need a bigger mirror," Adam joked. 

"You could stand to put a few pounds on, anyway. But you don't get it, do you?" Kris asked, his fingertips gently tracing the slant of Adam's nose, the arch of his cheekbones and the curve of his lips. "You're gorgeous. I'm a gay guy. I wanta see as much of you as often as possible. This mirror. I wish I could make you see yourself the way I do--"

"My insecurities are my problem," Adam said automatically, then paused as his eyes went to the room safe hidden inside the closet. "Although, you're right. We can and do help each other be better versions of ourselves."

"Right." Kris nodded, then shoved Adam back on to the pillows with a sudden, hard push. "And I'm going to help you see. And I know how."

"That grin on your face is evil."

Kris cackled his best evil laugh.

"Was that your version of an evil laugh?"

"Shaddup. And I mean that in a nice way." Kris winked, then straddled Adam's hips. Slowly running his hands over Adam's' chest, he pondered, then smiled. He'd usually avoided this topic because it freaked Adam out, but maybe that squeamishness meant it was a key. "I know. You've always been squeamish about it, but waaaaay before I met you, I was a fan. Who had a poster on my closet door. A poster which I used to---"

"Aaack!" Adam squeaked, then put his hands over his ears and shook his head. "Can't hear, can't hear..."

Laughing, Kris pulled Adam's hands down. "Now listen. Or do I have to tie you down?"

"Puh-leeze."

Seeing the blush on Adam's cheeks, Kris smiled and leaned forward to kiss him, his mouth opening over Adam's, delighted when Adam responded instantly by parting his own lips and encircling Kris with his arms. Kris lifted his mouth, then shoved Adam's arms back down to the bed. "Seriously, I will tie you down."

"You don't have anything to use," Adam challenged. It was always fun on those rare occasions when Kris decided to get aggressive. 

"Is that a challenge, mister?" Kris jumped up from the bed. "Because I know you -- you brought along scarves."

"What are you going to tie them to, though?" Adam asked, gesturing towards the headboard. "No posts or anything."

"I'll figure it out."

Reaching for his phone, Adam shrugged. "Okay, while you do that, I'll call my mom."

"You're calling your mom while I look for something to use in a bondage game?"

"Sure. Why not?" Adam shrugged and pressed his mother's speed dial button and the the speaker phone. 

"She's gonna want to Skype--"

"Hi, Adam!" Leila called out happily. "Let's Skype!"

"You can't!" Kris yelled.

"Why not?" Leila asked, already knowing the answer.

Adam laughed. "Kris is naked."

"I am not!" Kris yelled. 

"Yes, he is." Leila laughed this time. 

"Okay, that's freaky. The two of you have the same laugh," Kris noted, hiding behind the closet door.

"He's hiding behind something, isn't he?" Leila asked with laughter still in her voice. The boys sounded totally fine. Good. She was hoping to never have to play Dr. Phil or Fairy Godmother to those two in that sort of _extremis_ again. 

"You got it. Which is kinda _nutso butso_...." Adam drawled in a fair imitation of Kris' voice the night before, minus -- he hoped -- the edge of sexual hunger Kris had in his tone.  
"Considering that I do _not_ have Skype on."

"Humph!" Kris grumbled loudly as he poked through Adam's space in the closet. "Aha!" He held up two scarves. "I knew it!"

"He knew what?" Leila asked. 

"That I overpacked."

"That's hardly a newsflash."

"Agreed." Adam grinned at Kris. "So I have no idea why he's so excited to discover it."

"Perhaps it's exciting to learn that the person you love is still there, after time and trouble and trauma."

"Or..." Kris whispered, rubbing the scarves over his body, then against his cock. He watched Adam's eyes widen. "Or maybe I appreciate the opportunities your overpacking provides."

"He's set on helping me overcome my insecurities, actually," Adam explained, lying back on the bed. If Kris was going to put on a show, he was going to watch. 

"I'll buy him a new hat then myself."

"Hat?" Adam asked, distracted by the way Kris was using the fringe of a scarf to tease his own cock. "How did you know about the hat?"

"Lane. And Twitter, my boy. Twitter. Ryan showed a picture from Twitter on E! last night and then Lane sent me two more pictures of the two of you in St. Mark's Square. That hat of Kris'..."

"Tell me about it. It has an orange feather." Adam grinned as Kris stuck his tongue out at him, then advanced on the bed, careful not to trip over the dangerous -- but useful -- stairs.

"Matches that chair, doesn't?" Leila asked with a laugh.

"Well, if the chair had glitter. Which, come to think of it," Adam remembered. "Did have orange glitter on it the last time I looked."

"Emmaline told me that's because Kris blew the glitter onto it and made a wish."

"A wish? What for?" Adam asked, then blinked in surprise when Kris grabbed his free hand and tied the scarf around his wrist in a tight knot. "Gotta go, Mom. I think Kris is about to make _my_ wishes come true. Again."

"These chairs are too dainty." Adam grimaced as he gingerly pulled on the scarves. Kris had brought the two padded gilt chairs from the small table over to either side of the bed and tied the ends of the scarves to them. "I could get overly excited and pull on the scarves and break the chairs. It's dangerous. You should untie me."

Kris grinned and ignored Adam's last statement as he crawled onto the bed and straddled Adam's hips. "See? My orange mushroom chair _is_ totally perfect. It's a multitasking marvel. You can sit in it and read or play the guitar or straddle your boyfriend's lap and take his big hard cock up your ass --" He wiggled backwards, grinning as his ass brushed Adam's hard cock as they both remembered many occasions on which they'd done exactly that.

"Well, you can. I'd break the thing..." Adam paused, then held up a finger. "Wait. There's an idea..."

"Oh, stop." Kris leaned forward and pressed a soft and what he hoped was a loving kiss on Adam's lips. He knew Adam's insecurities had been reanimated with what he'd thought he'd found on Kris' phone on New Year's. Time to start a new year all over again. "I know the truth."

Looking up into the warmth in Kris' brown eyes, Adam smiled and asked, "What truth?"

"Dani told me that you took care of my chair for me."

"She..." Adam shook his head. "That was supposed to be a secret."

"Why?"

"That chair was some sort of... talisman for you. Like magic or something. If magic could be ugly, that is," Adam teased. Sobering, he looked at the faint smile lines around Kris' mouth. "I couldn't bear the thought of you realizing it was getting too old and worn, that you might have to throw it out. So I was trying to make sure you could keep it forever, so you could have the magic or the talisman -- or whatever it is to you -- forever." 

"I appreciate it, but it's just a _thing_ , not a person. I'd get over it."

"I know. But you'd be sad."

"I'll be more sad if you don't be quiet and let me do what I wanna do." 

"Which is?" Adam yawned and snuggled back into the pillows. He closed his eyes and yawned again. "I could fall asleep right now. So if your version of bondage teasing or whatever you're doing is to make me sleepy... so sleepy..." He waited, then carefully slitted one eye open to find Kris bending over him, his nose almost touching Adam's. "Hey!" Adam squawked. "You startled me."

"That's nuthin', boy. I'm about to rock your world."

"Knock yourself out. Wake me up when you're ready." Adam yawned again. 

Kris narrowed his eyes. Adam was gonna regret that last yawn. He smiled and slowly slid down Adam's body until he was straddling his thighs.

"So. When I was just a _fan_..." Kris drawled slowly, watching the inevitable gulp and shiver Adam made whenever Kris brought that fact up and using it to his advantage as he trailed just his fingertips up the long length of Adam's thigh. "The first time I saw you -- on Idol -- I thought you were so beautiful." Kris ran his fingertip down Adam's nose, then outlined the curve of his lips. "Beautiful. I had no idea how well you could sing or what your personality was like. I thought you were fuckin' hot."

"Oh." Adam held his breath and listened.

"Then you wore those zipper pants to sing Ring of Fire and...between your thighs... Heee. Between your thighs..." Kris drew his finger down over Adam's chin, down the center of his neck and chest, then over the center of Adam's hard cock. "Right there, your package and then the camera swung around you and seriously? Love that cameraman. He swung around and I saw your ass and then around again. The thighs... So long and taut... Those pants were so damn tight and that zipper and that wail?" Kris laughed as he circled the head with his fingertip, then abruptly bent down and gave a fast lick. "I had to excuse myself to my parents and run to my room to jerk off."

Adam felt his mouth drop open in shock. "You never told me that before!"

"You've always freaked out about me bein' a fan." Kris shrugged. He shifted to slide his knees inbetween Adam's thighs and shoved them outward, smiling as Adam gave him a cautious look. "What's that look?"

"You should've told me that. I think." Hmm, maybe Kris having been a fan wasn't entirely horrible, Adam decided. 

"Why?"

"Well, I would've worn those zipper pants more often..." Adam lost his train of thought as Kris bent his head again and slowly licked just the cock head while his hand encircled the base of Adam's cock. He reached to push Kris' head down and grimaced when he remembered his hands were tied up. 

Kris frowned and pretended to nip at Adam's cock with his teeth, laughing huskily when Adam hissed a warning, then groaned when Kris licked him again. "Damn, I should've made you listen. Where are they?" He used his other hand to push Adam's thigh away, then curled it around his balls, his middle finger teasing. 

"Umm... My balls are in your hand."

"Not them!" Kris laughed. "The pants?"

"Well, not he--eeere." Adam blushed as his voice squeaked, but damn, Kris' hand knew just how to touch him. And his mouth... his lips were already reddened, which always was so enticing, he just wanted to kiss him and... his hands were tied. Kris was so going to pay for this. 

"Maybe we can get a pair." Kris nodded. They'd visit that tailor Adam had sent him to; those leather pants he'd made for Kris without a single fitting had been perfect. "Anyway, we're not here to have a fashion discussion." He ran his fingers in small circles around the head of Adam's cock, smearing the pre-come over the head. "Because you look best when you're naked." He reached up with both hands and caressed Adam's skin from the hips up, moving slowly, wanting to make sure he touched every inch, skimming his fingers across arrays of freckles, then pressing firmly over Adam's stomach, curling his hands around Adam's upraised arms, before bending his head and repeating his path with his mouth. God, the man was beautiful. "Yes, naked is your best suit."

"No, I look better with my clothes on."

"As far as I'm concerned, the point to you wearing clothes is to tease me into wanting to take them off. As an example, that _Rolling Stone_ poster..." Kris grabbed the scarves in either hand and tugged on the scarves. "With your hands over your head, lying there like you were just waiting for someone to fuck? That poster was my very closest friend with benefits for a long time. Because you were. So. Damn. Hot."

"Oh no, not the poster..." Adam winced. That poster that had been on Kris' closet door and there was probably some symbolism in that, but really it just freaked him out, especially the way Kim Allen would occasionally try and joke about it and -- "Hey!" Adam yelped when Kris bit his inner thigh.

"You're thinking too hard. Pay attention."

"Make me." 

"I jerked off a whole lotta nights to that poster." Kris smiled when Adam's eyes popped.

Adam closed his eyes. "Oh god." 

"Yeah, I said that plenty of times." Kris grinned. And waited for Adam to open his eyes, slowly and carefully, then deepened his smile and laughed.

"Again with the evil smile. And cackle." Relaxing, Adam smiled back, then tensed up again a second later, when Kris -- that bitch -- continued.

"I imagined peeling that shirt back..." Kris teasingly stroked his fingertips from the center of Adam's chest outward. "And licking your nipples. I imagined unbuckling that belt and how you'd be naked underneath. I'd sliiiiiide..." His hand slid slowly down Adam's stomach and wiggled onto his pelvis as if Kris were sliding his hand inside tight jeans. "Just like that. I imagined sliding my hand inside your jeans and of course, you'd be naked under them."

"Of...course." Adam gulped, unsure whether his eyes should be on Kris' face or his hand. Then again, Kris' cock was interesting too, given how hard it was. Kris was actually totally turned on right now. Wow. And he wasn't doing anything, just... lying here letting Kris have his way. "Then what?"

Ha. Kris knew he had Adam now. "And then you'd pull off your jeans and I'd kneel in between your legs..." Running his hands up and down Adam's legs in firm, smooth strokes, Kris watched Adam's eyes. They weren't cautious any more, they were alight with curiosity and excitement. "And I'd touch your cock... and wonder if it was going to fit inside my mouth or my ass because it's so fucking big..." Kris smiled, curled his fingers around the base of Adam's cock and then licked a circle around the head. 

"It would fit," Adam said quickly. "Anywhere you wanted."

"I decided that all on my own," Kris admitted with a smile, interspersing his words with licks of Adam's cock. Really, he could do this all day. He loved this cock. "Because what kind of stupid fantasy would it be if your cock didn't fit inside me?"

"Pretty stupid?" Adam asked eagerly, tilting his hips up to try and shove more of his cock into Kris' mouth. He pulled on the scarves in frustration when Kris lifted his head and began talking again. What was up with the damn talking? 

"I couldn't decide what I wanted more. To suck that gorgeous cock of yours... ya know, like this?" Kris asked, then opened his mouth and eagerly sucked Adam's cock deep inside, swallowing and sucking until Adam was writing under him and swearing in some Adamesque language whose entire dictionary was about sex and genitalia and what he was going to do to Kris later. He could relate; if his mouth wasn't full, he'd probably be babbling too right now with the desire that was engulfing him with every thrust of Adam's hips, driving his cock deeper into Kris'm mouth. 

"OhfuckyeahharderthassitsucksuckmeswallowaroundmeyeahohgodKrisyouregoodloveyousohot..." Adam mumbled, thrusting his hips up, unable to look away from the avid hunger on Kris' face as he kept sucking and licking Adam's cock as if he'd waited years for the opportunity.

Pulling back with a wet popping sound, Kris laughed as Adam groaned in frustration. This tying up business was damn fun. "Yes, I did used to think about what I wanted from you. To suck your cock or to have it stuffed inside me. Luckily..." Kris grinned. "Since I'm in control now, I can do both."

"You..." Adam began, then gasped and kneed Kris in the hip, trying to urge him back to his cock. "Get back to it." 

"Hmm...mebbee..." Kris smiled as Adam glared at him, then bent his head and gave a long slow lick, laughing when Adam wiggled around trying to shove his cock in Kris' mouth. "So impatient! And I"m not done with my story. So." Kris sat up and wrapped one hand around his cock and the other went to his nipple ring, both moving slowly as he spoke. "So I used to lie there, looking at the poster, playing with myself, imagining my hands were your hands."

"They could be if you'd untie me!" Adam growled in frustration, even as his eyes stayed glued to Kris' hands. Damn that nipple ring... It should be in his mouth. Or that hard cock of his. Anything!

"Not yet. Patience." Kris shook his head and sped up pumping his cock and pulling his ring. "Although I have to admit that those fantasies about you in the poster usually got me off pretty damn fast."

"Gurgfuckkilldamn..." Adam growled, tugging on the scarves, then gasping as Kris shoved his hips forward and brushed his cock against Adam's, the slick wetness making the heated flesh slide.

"So I'd sit there on the bed, usually, imagining that I was straddling you and that I had to jerk myself off first before having you so I didn't embarrass myself too badly by coming instantly when you were inside me..." Kris straightened up and moved forward, rubbing Adam's wet cock head back over his balls and against his hole. He grinned when Adam immediately thrust upward, twisting his hips as he sought to get inside.

"Spread your legs--" 

"Oooh, that was my line in my fantasies, every once in a while," Kris admitted as he rocked his hips back and forth, teasing Adam's cock. He pumped his own cock, watching Adam twist and turn against his bonds, the long muscles in his arms and torso tightening and his lips parted, his eyes focused on Kris. The tension between them rose along with the heat and Kris looked down at Adam. "Damn, you're so hot and you're mine. Mine! That was what I always wanted. Your hotness belonging to me." He arched his back and cried out as he came, the wet heat spilling over his fingers. Shuddering, he kept his eyes on Adam's face, his eyes wide and glittering with desire. "Damn, you're so fine." Sliding his fingers away from his over-sensitized cock, he scooped them through his own fluid on Adam's body and then spread his leg, grinning as Adam gaped at him. "You don't have to do anything to be sexy, you get it? You just are."

"I... Okay. And...Are you seriously going to open yourself with your own cum?" Adam asked, licking his lips and hoping that he didn't sound desperate. 

"Yes. I'm going to lube myself up with my own cum," Kris repeated, watching Adam's eyes grow darker and more intense as his fingers disappeared inside his own body. "Not like I really need to, since I'm still a little wet from the last time you fucked me." He paused, knowing how that always set Adam off and grinned when Adam groaned and once again shifted his hips trying to get inside. "Because I can't wait for you to be inside me again. Why is that?"

"Because you're my cock slut, aren't you?" Adam asked in a low tone, smiling in satisfaction when Kris colored and then shivered, his nipples once again tightening. "You like my cock hot and hard inside you, don't you?"

"Nothing's better than your cock. I knew it from the time I first saw that poster," Kris added, removing his fingers and settling himself over Adam's cock. "Now show me what I knew you could do. Take me." 

"Finally." Adam bent his knees and shoved Kris' ass as he thrust his hips up, his cock and Kris' body meeting with the ease of long practice and the need of newness, just as they did every time. He groaned when Kris' body opened and took him inside and Kris moaned and wiggled and his cock started to rise again. He watched Kris arch his back and then grind down, trying to get Adam deeper inside him, like he couldn't get enough.

"More." Kris stretched along Adam's long body, curling his hands around Adam's biceps, pulling back, then pushing down just as Adam thrust up. Damn, he could do this all day. Then again, they basically had done this all day yesterday. Well, if it was good the first time, it was even better the second time. 

"This is your favorite position, isn't it?" Adam asked, gritting his teeth to keep from coming instantly.

"Well, it's convenient given how often I'm sitting on your lap or lying on top of you, plus..." Kris smiled and gave Adam a soft kiss, just as he ground himself down on Adam's cock. He loved that feeling of being opened by that big cock. Damn, it was an effort to keep focused, but he was a man on a mission. "But it's also my favorite position when I top. Wanna know why?" 

"Because your legs are too short to do it easily from behind without giving me a crick in my back?"

"You're gonna pay for that..." Kris sits up and runs his own hands up his torso, then began playing with his nipples, his hand teasing and pulling on the nipple ring as he listened to Adam moan and groan and wiggle under him. Sex was powerful indeed. And so were fears. But he believed with everything in him that love had the power to drive out fear. 

Seeing the determined look on Kris' face, Adam stilled, sensing that Kris was trying to tell him something important, that all of this... he looked down at Kris' hands now on Adam's skin again, pressing and stroking with not just love in every touch, but need and desire too. "So, why do you like to do it that way?" he prompted.

"To see your face." Kris tipped forward and took Adam's mouth in a deeply possessive kiss, tilting his head and opening his lips, his tongue stroking and licking until Adam was once again panting under him. He paused, scraping his teeth over Adam's bottom lip, hearing Adam's nearly silent intake of breath that was waiting, just as Adam was waiting, his body tense with need and his face taut with desire. "Your beautiful face." 

Adam felt his heart melt at the sincerity in Kris' face, the love in his eyes, all in combination with the way Kris was making love to him. The heat flushed through him, making the top of his head tingle just as his balls pulled up, unable to resist for one more second the need to release inside of Kris. He moaned, pulling at his bonds again, the surrendered and called out. "Kris, so gooood, love you..." 

Minutes later, Kris reluctantly pulled off and went into the bathroom, returning with a cloth to clean them up. Finished, he put it into the sink and returned to the bed, climbing up next to Adam and stroking him from his wrists down to his ankles. "Beautiful, you know that? I can't believe it. Sometimes, all the time. That you belong to me." 

"You're the beautiful one," Adam said softly, staring up at Kris. "But you make me feel..."

"Beautiful. Say it," Kris demanded, once again leaning over Adam, moving his mouth back down Adam's body, licking at his damp skin, laving his tongue over Adam's nipples under Adam swore, grinning as he flicked his tongue over Adam's belly button and felt the incipient laughter that faded to tightened muscles as he kept sliding down, skirting around that nice big cock and licked his balls. "Or I'll stop. And you don't want me to stop, do you?" Kris asked, looking up, his tongue licking the air in front of Adam's cock. "Say it. Say, I am beautiful."

Drawing in a deep breath, Adam held it as he stared at Kris' mouth. His lips were meant for giving head. He let out a long hiss as Kris suddenly sucked his own finger into his mouth, got it wet and then began trailing down over his balls. He arched up, his eyes locked on Kris', who was not only determined but patient. Deadly combination. Kris was this unique combination of easygoing and stubbornness. "You shouldn't..."

"I should do what I want. Isn't that what you're always telling me? That I can have you, take you, anyway I want? Well, I want to show you how beautiful you are, everywhere. How I can't have enough of you not just because I love you, but because you're beautiful. Say it." When Adam still hesitated, Kris frowned, then nodded. "Do it for me. Say it for me. Say, I'm beautiful."

"I'm..." Adam took a deep breath and saw himself reflected in Kris' eyes and relaxed. "I'm beautiful."

Kris closed his eyes and said a swift prayer of thanks that Adam had taken that step. He slid upward and pressed his mouth against Adam's in a slow, long slide of lips connecting as their hearts melded. "You are. So beautiful I can't get enough. Even way back when, I knew I'd never get enough of you, that I had to have you in every way possible. So I also imagined me having you. Legs spread..." Kris slid inbetween Adam's legs and he pushed his knees against Adam's thighs. "Spread 'em," Kris ordered, shoving Adam's thighs apart. "Because I'm not done yet."

"You're amazing," Adam whispered. 

"What's amazing is how much I want you. Always have. Always will. Get it?" Kris asked, his hands tight on Adam's hips, hoping he left marks there. He couldn't wait to get his ring on Adam's finger. "See, when I was imagining this, I wasn't thinking about conversatin' with you or listenin' to you sing or how sweet you are. Nope." Kris smiled. And sometime, love should use sex to drive out the fear and insecurities. "I was thinkin' that you were fucking hot and I wanted you to fuck me and sometimes, that I wanted to fuck you."

"So... I was a sex object." Adam grinned. Awesome! Why had he forbidden Kris from talking about he'd been a fan before? Idiotic move on his part. "I was a sex object to you."

"Yes."

"That's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me."

"I know, right?" Kris smiled down at Adam, thrilled to see the happiness and amusement in his eyes. "Now that we're finished splashing around in the shallow end of the pool, it's time to get deep."

"Sounds-- Oh!" Adam yelped and jumped as Kris' finger touched his hole. "Uh-oh." 

"Sounds like you need to relax." Once again opening his mouth over Adam's cock, Kris gave long, wet open-mouthed kisses to Adam's cock, then sucked him inside, using every trick he'd learned over the years to make Adam moan and shudder and shake, then wetting his fingers and slowly inserting them inside while Adam took a deep breath. He reached for the lube under the pillow and waited until Adam nodded, then in a flurry of eager motions, readied Adam and slid inside him, both of them gasping in a fast slide of legs and hips and lips as they pressed against each other, twisting and writhing to get closer and closer until they were closer still, their bodies reaching, finding, then falling back into stillness.

"You are beautiful to me. Outside and inside. Don't you get it, Adam?" Kris asked, his mouth pressing soft kisses to Adam's cheek, waking Adam from a doze. "We were blessed to find each other and you were blessed...." He smiled.

"What's so funny?" Adam asked, feeling Kris' lips curl upward against his skin, his eyes closed as his freed hands gently stroked down Kris' bare back, then skimmed over the curves of his ass. Mine, mine, mine. He opened his eyes and looked down into Kris' sweetly earnest face as he kept talking about how Adam was gorgeous. And... Adam thought, maybe... Well, sometimes. Everyone had bad hair days, after all. But the truth was, he needed better priorities, better focus. He'd been blessed the day Kris had walked into his life or more to the point, the day Geoffrey had decided to be some sort of fairy godfather and send Cinderfella to the coffeehouse because if he were being honest, he wouldn't have ever agreed to meet Kris if Geoffrey had been honest about it and that would have been the biggest mistake he'd ever made. So... maybe it had been meant to be, just in a different way than he'd thought. Another detour in life that led to the desired destination. 

"I was thinking about what I thought the first time I met you in person. That song--"

"That cheesy song?" Adam smiled and pressed a kiss onto the top of Kris' head. "That Jay said was about birds?"

"Yeah. But it popped into my head. Because you have been blessed, by God, or the gods or the fates, or whatever higher power works for you. Or like the song said, angels." Kris began to sing softly, against Adam's pulse, wishing the sentiment in the song would beat into Adam's blood and find a home in his heart. "On the day that you were born, the angels got together and they decided to create a dream come true. So they sprinkled gold dust in your hair and golden starlight in your eyes of blue..." Kris traced the arch of Adam's eyebrows, then the edges of his lashes. "You don't even need glitter. You sparkle all on your own."

 

"Wes saw some princesses already, Daddies!" Emmaline cried out, launching herself across the dizzying pattern of the mosaic-tiled floor of the hotel lobby to throw her arms around Adam's legs, then Kris'. "Grammy Weiwa told me there would be princesses here, just walking around--"

"I told her that people would be in costumes like princesses, walking around like a big outdoor party," Leila explained.

"Well, it does look unreal, like being on a movie set, only it's real," Kim agreed with a smoothing pat to her granddaughter's head. "I can't believe I'm here."

"I know!" Kris gave his mother a hug, still shocked that she'd made a last minute decision to join everyone else even if it had meant an argument with Neil Allen. "It's hard to believe that us small town people are here in Venice, isn't it?"

"It's hard to believe that you have enough hair to wear that hat, dude." Cale grinned and slapped Kris on the back, gratified to see that Kris looked relaxed and happy. 

"It fits perfectly, I'll have you know." Kris sniffed and tugged the hat down on his head. "I think it's kick...awesome," he amended quickly when Emmaline tugged on his leg.

"But I think my dresses are the prettiest!"

"Well, of course they are!" Adam told his daughter. "We designed them together. And no one's better at picking out your clothes than me! Everyone--"

"Everyone here!" Emmaline flung her arms wide and gesturing to the group gathered in the hotel lobby. "Lookit!"

"Everyone is here!" Kris agreed, picking Emmaline up and hugging her close. He nodded as Adam indicated he was going to the front desk to get everyone's keys.

Emmaline giggled. "Dadakiss, your hat tickles!" She giggled again when Kris bobbed his head and made his feather dance. "Did your wish come true?" Emmaline asked, playing with the feather on Kris' hat. Before he could answer, she laughed and held out her hand. "It did. I sees the orange glitter."

Smiling as he looked down at his daughter, Kris bopped her on the head with the brim of his hat and whispered, "Yes, my wish did come true. Or almost all of it. I still have a little work to do on it. Because sometimes you have to work to make your wishes come true." Because he still had to give Adam that ring of silver and gold. 

"I dunno 'bout that." Emmaline shook her head. "Maybe you just need a fairy godmother."

"You know fairy godmothers are just make believe, pumpkin." Kim reminded Emmaline. 

"I not a pumpkin." Emmaline shook her head. "Because that means I'd have a scary face on Halloween... Wait. That's good. Our family likes Halloween. Dadam has the best masks. But if it were Cinderella land..."

"Disneyland?" Eber asked.

"Yes. If I were a pumpkin, I'd turn into a carriage and that's not too much fun. So I'll be a scary pumpkin." Emmaline made a grimace and curled her fingers into claws.

"Excellent choice!" Teresa agreed. "Are you excited about being in Venice, sweetheart?"

"Idongetit, Auntie Teresa!" Emmaline said in a rush. "Why it take so long to get to the beach?"

"It's a different Venice. This is the first Venice. It's much older than the one close to us in California. The one in California is named after this one. We have to go across an ocean to get there, remember?" 

"Even older than Grammy Kim or Grammy Weiwa or Brushbrush?" Emmaline asked. 

"Much much older..." Teresa bit her lip and avoided looking to the side. "People didn't come to this Venice for the beach. They were running away from war, if I remember correctly." 

"People were chasing them," Kris offered, remembering that much from the guidebook he'd read in the stupid Lambert St. Louis Airport.

"Like the paps?" Emmaline asked.

"Yes, like the paps," Lane agreed. "So they fled to the ocean and began building homes."

"Like when we went to that boring place? With the houses on the stilts?"

"Bora Bora?" Lane nodded. "Something like that. And they built very big and very wide stilts and put the houses right on the water, so it's like they're floating." 

"And then they were happy?"

"And then they were happy. Because they were safe. And every spring they have what they call a Carnevale -- but no rides," Dani said quickly. "But lots and lots of costumes and masks. Some pretty and some scary."

Emmaline thought, then decided. "I want a scary mask."

"I'm sure we'll find you a scary mask when we go to the mask store or any sort of mask you want," Kim promised.

"Masks are good. I bet Dadam has a scary mask. He likes being scary at Halloween."

"But you know that's just make believe," Kim reminded her. "Because your Dadam is a big sweetheart."

Kris stared at his mother in surprise. She'd always liked Adam but never really said anything like that before.

"What?" Kim asked. "The man made dump cake for you. That says everything you need to know right there, doesn't it?"

"Well, that and taking care of my chair," Kris said softly.

"The mushie chair." Emmaline sighed. Dadakiss and that chair. He treated it like it was the rose in the glass jar in Beauty and the Beast. "So... My daddies went to Venice to get away from the paps and they're safe. And they're happy! And sos am I because everyone's here now and if I'm Cinderella, then someone here can be the fairy godmother 'cause family takes care of each other." 

"Everyone _is_ here!" Adam said as he came back and perused the group with a smile. With everything going on and being so focused on Kris, he'd almost forgotten that much of their immediate family was coming to Carnevale too. Even Kim. They should've just gotten married here. Oh well, a wedding was a great excuse for another blow-out party. "Awesome. The more the merrier..." he said as he went around and distributed keys with a hug and kiss while the bellman pulled in all of their luggage. "Do we have enough hotel rooms and --" He broke off as he saw the basilisk stare Lane was giving him. "Of course, we do." 

"Of course, we do. I took care of it months ago when the idea was first broached. Because planning is essential if you want hotel rooms -- or anything else -- in Venice during Carnevale." 

"Yes, it is," Adam agreed while noting that Lane looked wired. And tired. "I'd like to know who arranged for that watertaxi pick up for Kris."

Yawning, Lane shrugged. "I'll put on my Sydney Bristow wig later. Right now I need to sleep and focus on getting my gown for the ball steamed and pressed. The hotel has that service, does it not? Because I really have to look perfect."

"Yes, this little old guy is a valet and does a fantastic job." Adam paused, then knowing that as picky as Lane was, she normally wasn't a perfectionist, he realized she _knew_. He leaned forward to ask, "What do you know?"

"Who, me?" Lane put her hand on her chest and tried to look innocent. "I know nothing."

"Ha!" Adam scoffed. He whispered, "Who screwed up? Cale or Kris?"

Lane bent forward and whispered back, "Neither. I may _accidentally_ have overheard something and I may have snooped."

"Laaaaane." Adam shook his head. He wasn't surprised because Lane did not like surprises. She liked everything planned. No wonder she and Geoffrey got along so well; peas in a pod.

"Hush. I want to look perfect when the moment happens. And the moment doesn't just happen..." Lane bit her lip, remembering too late that Kris and Adam hadn't just happened either.

"It's okay, Laney," Adam soothed as he reached out to take Emmaline from Kris. "I'm over it. It doesn't matter how we met, just that we met." 

Kris bit his lip as he overheard Adam's comment. Kris knew he himself felt that way, that the process wasn't important as long as the end result was the same, but Adam was different. He had that deep romantic streak, he wanted to believe in magic and the universe and fate and all that crap. Kris rubbed the back of his neck and looked up, seeing guilty sympathy on Geoffrey's face. They grimaced at each other and then Kris growled when Neil elbowed him hard in the ribs. "Hey, you--"

"Hey, runt. Get over the guilt," Neil whispered, turning away from talking to Eber, something about the plan to keep Venice from sinking. "Adam's a big boy. And he has the love of his life back. He's calling it a win. And didn't you two do that do over by bumping into each other in that old time coffee shop? That was pretty damn perfect, wasn't it?"

Frowning as he realized he hadn't told Adam that the old dude had sent him to Florians because they'd been too preoccupied in fucking each other's brains out, Kris looked up and then grinned at the face Neil was pulling.

"Oh _c'mooooooon_ ," Neil groaned. "Enough with the blissed out fucked look already."

"Neil!" Leila exclaimed, slapping his arm and nodding in Emmaline's direction.

Neil shrugged, then winced when his mother slapped his arm again. "She's busy yapping with Adam and Lane right now about Adam's ridiculous hat which -- I admit -- is actually sedate in comparison with that monstrosity on Kris' head. She didn't hear anything."

"Be. Have." Leila glared at her younger son before turning back to Geoffrey and Teresa.

"I agree. I thought you'd grown up," Dani added with a narrow look before turning back to Lane and Cale.

"So, how's Venice anyway?" Neil asked, deciding to try for a neutral topic before his mother killed him and he blew whatever chance he'd been hoping to have with Dani in this city everyone said was so romantic. "I stupidly thought the gondola was how everyone got around, but that watertaxi was pretty big and--"

"Hey, do you know who Charon is?" Kris asked. Neil always knew the most useless shit.

"Charon?" Neil stared at Kris in surprise. Since when did Kris make allusions to mythology? "Sure. The boatman who took the dead to the underworld in Greek mythology."

"Oh. You do know."

"I went to college. And actually graduated!" Neil gasped. "Unlike you two drop outs." 

"You know, I can't wait to see you in the costumes Adam's rigged up for you." Kris grinned smugly. "Just. Can't. Wait."

"What does that mean?" Neil asked suspiciously with a groan. He should've known better than to allow Adam free rein on a costume for him.

"It's not easy being green..." Kris sang. He could not wait to see Neil in a bright green cape with matching feather. 

 

"I think I'll change the feather out on my hat. Maybe for a white one? Or silver? Or how about gold? I have all of those colors in my feather case. Along with a bright blue one, but I think that's better for the morning hours, don't you?"

"Feather case?" Kris laughed and began unbuttoning his shirt. They'd eaten with everyone and Emmaline had conked out, along with most of the adults, so everyone had gone back to their rooms. But they weren't tired, so it was time for sex. Although Adam was under the mistaken apprehension that it was time to talk about fashion. 

"What do you think?" Adam asked, setting his hat down on a table in their hotel room and giving it a critical stare. He glanced over at Kris whose shirt was hanging loose as he bent over to pull off his boots. Well, now there was a dilemma. Should he look at Kris' ass or the silver ring dangling from his nipple? What a problem. 

"I think I want to do it with our hats on."

"You what?" Adam gaped, then began laughing. He stopped, then started again. "I can't even... That is so ridic...."

Pouting, Kris stepped forward and poked Adam's chest. "I think it would be fun."

"I think I won't be able to get a hard on because I'll be laughing so hard. Besides, we can't kiss with those hats on." 

Pushing open his shirt, Kris flicked his finger over his nipple ring, grinning when Adam's eyes immediately went to his chest and he licked his lips. Kris reminded Adam, "I did this for you... Did I mention that it hurt? A lot? But I went through the pain for you." 

"Are you going to use that to get your way all the time?"

"If it works." Kris winked. "Well..." He asked, gently tugging on the ring.

"Ohdearfuck..." Groaning, Adam picked his hat back up, put it on his head and straightened his feather.

 

"Where in the world did you get this hat, anyway?" Adam asked as they lay together on the bed breathing heavily, the hat on the floor beside the bed. "Why are you so fond of it?"

"Well, when I put it on, I got all.... confident. I was a little nervous before, but when you're wearing a hat like that? Man, you gotta be ready for anything! I was ready to slay dragons and--"

"Excuse me, what did you say?" Adam gaped as he thought of the ring.

"I was ready to slay dragons, I was ready for anything, including and most importantly..." Kris raised his face and kissed Adam's parted lips, tasting the wine they'd drunk between the blowjobs and laughter and Adam pounding him into the mattress and more laughter. Hmm. Maybe they'd had a little too much wine because Adam looked really confused. "Seeing you again after being separated -- because I was a _goober._ That hat -- it made me feel like I could conquer the world. So. Good choice on your part." Kris laughed, then seeing Adam's perplexed look, asked, "Are you so drained you can't remember?" He laughed as he rolled onto his side and flung an arm and leg over Adam's body, then wiggled closer. "Mmm... Missed this..." He whispered, sliding on top of Adam and rubbing his nose against Adam's shoulder. 

"Me too." Adam smiled happily and wrapped his arms around Kris, his right hand caressing the smooth skin. He nudged Kris' face up and pressed kisses along his cheekbone. "You've spent a lot of time making me feel good about myself, but you know that I think you're the most gorgeous man, don't you?"

"Kinda." Kris wrinkled his nose and lifted his mouth and with the perfect aim of much practice, once again captured Adam's lips with his. Yup, he was a pirate after all. "Remember that time you annoyed Neil by singing Your Body Is a Wonderland to me by the pool?"

Chuckling, Adam kissed Kris while squeezing his ass. "I meant the words to that song. And even though Neil and I get along so well these days, I wanted him to go home. So I could play with your body." He slid one hand over Kris' hip and then up his body, playing with the nipple ring.

"He told me I was right to bust his chops, throw the potatoes at him, ya know." Kris laughed and once again rubbed his cheek into Adam's shoulder. He could just stay here until dinner time.

Resting his chin on the top of Kris' head, Adam smiled. Neil had been Kris' strongest champion right from the beginning and had pushed and poked Adam into facing his own demons. But still, it was _Neil_ , who would always be his annoying little brother. "Neil should probably have potatoes thrown at him on a regular basis. Just don't do it with his new hat. Green or not, it cost the earth."

"I won't. I'll be too busy ogling you in your lace up leather pants." 

"Same." Almost drifting off to sleep, Adam smiled, then jerked back to wakefulness. "Wait a minute. Those pants. And -- _What_ should I remember about that hat?"

"You gave it to me. Or had the old guy give it to me. So you had to know I'd love it and it's your fault if I want to wear it all--"

" _What_ old guy?" Adam sat up, his heart pounding.

"Whaaaat..." Kris complained as he slid back onto the bed. 

"Come here." Adam pulled Kris up to straddle his lap.

"I'm tired. Wanna take a little nappie." Kris sighed and tried to settle back down on top of Adam. He snuggled closer and put his head into the crook of Adam's neck and shoulder.

Shoving Kris back up to sitting, Adam squeezed his shoulders. "Later. I know you're a lightweight when it comes to alcohol, but seriously, Kris. Pay _attention._ Tell me. Where did you get that hat? And for that matter, all of those clothes?"

"From that costume shop you sent me to." Kris smiled as Adam slid his hands down over his chest and pouted when Adam ignored the nipple ring. Well. Drastic times called for drastic measures, he decided and did his best wiggle on Adam's lap.

"Kris. Hold still. Don't distract me. Focus yourself." Adam's hands tightened on Kris' waist. " _I_ didn't send you to a costume shop."

"Very funny. You sent this boatman -- Charoni -- which is some take off on the name of the boatman who takes people to the underworld--"

"What's the underworld? Some club?"

"No! It's from Greek... or Roman mythology. I dunno." Trailing a hand down the center of Adam's chest, Kris smiled. "They had Pearline in to show us snakes instead of teaching us about pagan religions 'cause you know snake handlin' is what God-fearin' Christians do so that's cool, but learnin' about other religions, well, now, that's Dang. Er. Ous."

Adam stared at Kris. "What was dangerous was that damn drawl. I think I need a knife to cut it. As well as to cut you free from the idea that I know a damn thing about Greek or Roman mythology. All I know is that I started to take a class on it in college - which lasted all of three weeks -- and the professor said mythology is the study of religions people've stopped believing in. Which was an intriguing idea, but not enough to keep me in college. So I don't remember much of anything else, so I sure as _hell_ did not set up some elaborate scheme based upon a story about some boatman!"

"Okay already!" Kris huffed. "So, anyway. This Charoni met me at the airport with a sign with my name on it and he took me to this costume shop."

"What was the name of it?"

"Beats me. I can't read Italian. The door had a carved sign, I guess it was, over it. It started out with _Qui_ something... then something like convenience... Charoni gave me a shove and I went inside and it was realllllly creepy with all the masks, then this old guy came out from behind a curtain and made me undress and--"

"We need to call the police."

"What? Why?" Kris rubbed his eyes as he struggled to make sense of what Adam was so hyped up about. He really should have laid off on the wine, but it had been soooo sweet and Adam's lips... He bent forward again, then frowned when Adam shook his head. 

"Kris, I did _not_ send a driver or boatman to pick you up. I was there at the airport. Myself. To pick you up, just like I said I would."

"But...I don't get it." Kris stared at Adam's worried face and the concern on it made his head begin to clear. "There was a guy there in a costume -- really elaborate costume too. He gave me his name. It was Charoni. He had a sign with my name on it. He took me to this costume shop where this realllllly old guy gave me all those clothes including that hat and my sword! And they all fit perfectly! And he knew your name and our story and told me to find you at Florians--"

"My god!" Adam exclaimed, reaching for his phone. "I think you were kidnapped by a stalker! We should call the police!"

Kris shook his head and clamped his hand on Adam's arm. "Wait. The police? And tell them _what_? That some old dude gave me clothes, a book, and romantic advice?"

Adam put the phone down. Kris had a point. Nothing bad had happened to him, no ransom had been asked and in fact, Kris had bent sent on his way with _gifts._ Too bizarre. But still, maybe the police should be notified. "It's a stalker who's overinvested in our relationship?"

"Well, it'd be a new demographic. He was an _old_ Italian dude that looked like he'd been in that shop since the dawn of time. He was waiting behind a curtain. Like I talked about in the Leno interview, you know? Having a do over so that I could tell you some old guy behind a curtain -- by which I meant Geoffrey -- but it really was an old man behind the curtain. I mean, ooooold. As in old as the hills. He was so old that when he told me to have fun stormin' the castle, he sounded as old as Billy Crystal in Princess Bride."

"He said what?"

"Have fun stormin' the castle."

"I said... my mom... the sword..."

"You're babbling. I think I fucked you senseless--- Oh!" Kris shrieked when Adam rolled Kris underneath him. 

"You're being senseless. This is a big deal!" Adam pressed the full weight of his body onto Kris, then cursed when Kris opened his legs and wiggled up into his groin. He cursed again when Kris licked at the base of his neck. "I think you're the one who's been fucked senseless."

"I"m not sure I was. I think you need to try harder." Kris wiggled underneath Adam.

"I think you need to listen up, boy. After you went on Leno, I had this heart to heart with my mother and I was holding your little green sword and... that sword was actually more like a key to me, to getting where you were coming from. At the end I of that conversation, I got up and said something about stormin' the castle. Don't you think it's a little suspect that this guy said the same thing to you and gave you a sword too?" 

"And soooo? The Princess Bride movie is super popular. And half the guys walking around Venice right now have a decorative sword. Can we get back to you trying harder?" Kris began to kiss the base of Adam's neck.

"Can you pay attention? This is serious!"

"C'mon. We're never going to find out. And so what?" Kris shrugged. "Charoni and the old dude were nice to me. So this guy gave me clothes and told me you were at Florians--"

Adam growled. Kris wasn't taking this seriously enough. "But I hadn't told anyone that! I was out looking for you and I came back here thinking maybe Lane had told you the name of the hotel, even though she said she hadn't because she could've forgotten, and the doorman and bell boy told me to check out St. Mark's Square and I was just looking in Florians to see if you were there--"

"So you weren't expectin' me at Florians? You hadn't planned on being there?" Kris shivered and burrowed deeper into Adam's embrace as a chill made goosebumps pop out all over his body. "What voodoo is this?" 

"That's what I"m saying! I was not expecting you at Florians because I hadn't planned on meeting you there. I wasn't...planning on that close a do over, although in retrospect I wish I had, because it was..."

"Perfect." Kris nodded.

"It...was perfect. But how did it happen? I went in there looking for you. The hotel guys -- that doorman? He suggested that everyone ends up in St. Mark's Piazza and I should look for you there. I went into every shop and cafe in that piazza looking. That's why when you showed up, I was a nervous wreck. I was expecting to meet you at the airport. Like I texted you before you got on the plane to go to Italy. And when I couldn't find you, I was afraid you'd changed your mind or been kidnapped or fallen into a damn canal! And that would be my perfect punishment for throwing you out, because karma is a bitch and--- Mphmmf!" Adam mumbled when Kris put his fingers across his mouth.

"Shhh. Adam." Kris replaced his fingers with his lips and kissed Adam until he felt the tension in his muscles relax. Good. Now it was his turn to freak out. If there was one thing he'd learned from the mess on New Year's Day was that only one of them could freak out at a time. "I don't know what the hell's goin' on. First off, I'm so sorry you were worried. Especially since now's I think I about it, I thought I was in that shop for an hour, two at most, but you said it was six hours. How did I lose all that time? Someone was messin' with us. But, _I_ didn't..." 

"I know you didn't. But who did?"

"Who and _why_." Kris frowned, then held up his hand. "Wait. _Neil!_ He knew that Charon was a boatman to the underworld you go to after you die. So was he playing a joke on us? Sounds like the kinda thing he'd do. Do ya think--"

"What time is it?" Adam reached for his phone and looked at it. "Everyone should be awake by now. And if not, too bad, so sad. I'll call him." Pressing a speed dial number, he waited momentarily and Neil answered. "Hey, Neil. Did you send Kris on some wild goose chase to a costume shop to get a cape and that big-ass hat of his?"

"Huh?" Neil rubbed his eyes and shrugged at his father's quizzical look. "I know I didn't get much sleep on the flight, but what the actual fuck? Send Kris on a wild goose chase to a costume shop? It sounds like a great way to torment the runt, but not my idea. Plus, what the hell do I know about Venice? Let alone about costume and cape-makers in Venice?" Neil argued. "I mean, seriously? _Capes_?"

"Well, that answers that." Adam rolled his eyes as he hung up on his brother in mid-squawk. "Geoffrey?"

"He wouldn't..." Kris shook his head.

"Ha!" Adam hit a speed dial on his phone. "Interfering is his default."

Kris raised his eyebrows at the amusement on Adam's face. Huh. He was finding Geoffrey's meddling funny? Maybe Adam really and truly had forgiven him for screwing up... as long as he didn't do it again. And he wouldn't. Lesson learned. 

"Adam?" Geoffrey answered, his voice tense. "Is anything wrong? Did you and Kris-- I saw the picture of you two kissing and you two seemed great in the lobby, so it's all okay now, isn't it?"

"Yes, yes. I'm lying on top of him and we're both naked."

"And yet you're on the phone with me? Sometimes I wonder about your ability to set priorities."

"So do I!" Kris called out, laughing as he listened to Geoffrey's clipped British voice.

Adam rolled his eyes. "Listen up, Geoffrey. I'm just wondering if you couldn't resist interfering."

"With what?"

"With Kris' clothes."

"His _clothes_?" Geoffrey laughed and shrugged when Teresa sent him a curious look. "That's your purview. I thought you bought him a wardrobe for Carnevale from a custom tailor in LA?"

"I did, but someone gave him a new wardrobe--"

"With a kickass hat!" Kris cried out.

Adam sighed. "It has a ridiculously large and glittery orange feather, which instantly negates the description kickass."

"Your hat has a purple feather that's really big," Kris pointed out.

"Yeah. It's purple. Yours is _orange_. Like that damn chair. And the hat is as big as you are."

" _Soooo_ not true!" Kris argued back. "That hat is the best hat in the history of hats!"

Geoffrey began laughing. "Apparently all _is_ well in your world. As far as Kris' new wardrobe... While I share your deep aversion to the plaid, aside from suggesting he buy new jeans that actually fit in one of our first meetings, I have never tried to tell the boy how to dress." 

"Oh." Adam frowned. If not Geoffrey, then who? "This is just weird--"

**Knock knock**

Geoffrey said, "Hold on, there's someone at the door--"

"I've got it!" Teresa called out and hurried to the door.

Geoffrey laughed and whispered, "I _bet_ she got it. With a smile. It's the bloody valet coming back with my costume. She thinks he's hot."

"She thinks the valet is hot?" Adam asked, distracted. "She has weird taste. Then again, maybe not, _old_ man."

"What does that mean?"

"The valet is this really old little guy, half bent over..."

"No. He's about thirty and according to Teresa who is -- as you Yanks say -- trying to bust my chops so I don't take her for granted... Teresa says he's hot as hell and belongs in a Gucci ad. He's the only valet. I know this because the concierge explained while telling me to be patient when I called for service earlier."

"I...That's..." Adam stared at Kris. "Waitaminute. That old guy that was my valet took Kris' clothes and then Kris is given more clothes that fit perfectly by some old guy... Thanks, anyway." Adam hung up again and called the front desk. 

"Geoff." Teresa stared at him as she handed a tip to the valet. "Tell me you didn't interfere."

"I didn't interfere with their clothes."

"Geoff!"

"I swear. I did not. Humph. Didn't I prove that I'm capable of learning lessons in our  
 _own_ second chance?"

"I have to admit you did." Teresa sighed, then smiled. She pointed to her watch. "We should get going. I need to check my dress. Remember -- all of us girls are getting together to check our outfits?"

Geoffrey nodded. "That's right. And in truly manly fashion, the guys are going to Harry's Bar."

"Well, I wouldn't count on Adam and Kris joining you any time soon!" Teresa laughed. "Seems like they're having a little pre-wedding honeymoon."

"Adam was carrying on about clothes. Seems like they're a little busy with their own excursion right now. Something about a costume shop." 

 

"I know it was here!" Kris exclaimed as he reached forward to touch one of the gold-tipped poles. He felt Adam tugging on his cape to make sure he didn't fall into the canal. 

"It's easy to get lost," Adam said soothingly as Kris whirled around and stared at the seam between two buildings as if he could part the two buildings with his gaze. They'd gone back to St. Mark's and Kris had retraced his steps as best as he could remember, leading them down ever more narrow streets until he had suddenly stopped and pointed at the poles. They stood on a tiny walkway, empty of everything but themselves and milky white mist. He shivered. "And it's a little bit creepy here too, to be honest."

"I know, right?" Kris agreed. He put his hand on his hat and tipped his head back. "Seriously, I swear I remember those buildings, but where's the green door?" Kris pointed his finger at the vertical seam between two buildings, moving it up and down. Turning around slowly, he frowned and put his hands on his hips. "Or I think it was here. It's so confusing, all these little not-even-streets and bridges and the fog."

Adam nodded, grinning as he noted the way Kris' stance had pushed the cape back over his arms and his shirt tight across his chest. He could see the outline of the nipple ring against the white silk. They should just get back to the hotel and ... keep a close eye on each other to make sure they didn't step behind any more green doors. Yup, that's the ticket. And Kris would have to remember not to follow signs he didn't recognize. "When I went back to the hotel to ask for advice on looking for you, the doorman told me that everyone gets lost in Venice. It's the second most popular tourist activity after a gondola ride." 

"But I swear it was right here. I remember the pole!"

"I know you believe it, but it's so easy to get lost here," Adam reminded him. "And really, you were right before. You're safe and the guy did you no harm... although I might be wrong about that. That hat..." Adam teased, brushing the feather aside.

"I love my hat! It's orange, which is a tough color. I felt tall and super cool in it! Like I could do anything!"

"It's a regular superhero hat," Adam agreed with a grin as he looked down into Kris' happy face. He looked around and seeing no one, pulled off their hats and bent down to take Kris into his arms for a long kiss, wondering why he'd insisted they get out of bed. Judging by the glazed look in Kris' eyes and the way he was snuggling into Adam's arms, Kris would agree. They should just go back to the hotel and rest before dinner tonight. "But this green door? I suppose it doesn't matter."

"It does to me. I don't want you thinkin' I'm Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!" Kris poked Adam in the chest and slammed his hat back on his head.

A muffled snort of laughter from behind them made Adam and Kris whirl around. They both stopped dead as they saw a woman in an elaborate silver dress with wig, hat, and mask, the hoops on her dress so wide that it belled out over the edge of the canal.

"What a costume!" Adam gasped. The patterned tone-on-tone silver skirt was quilted in a diamond pattern with each corner flashing a bright stone, a flashing that seemed inexplicable in the watery light reflecting off the green canal water. The hem was edged with a deep and stiff silver lace. Her corset was tightly laced, the sleeves puffy, both neckline and cuffs edged with the same silver lace. And her mask... Adam sighed. It was a thing of beauty. It covered her face and had stiffened silver lace with little charms sewn onto it. 

" _Grazie_." The woman inclined her head.

"What the hell? Where did she come from?" Kris blurted out. "And did little bells just chime?"

"I don't know," Adam whispered back. "And yes. And I want to know where she got that mask. Umm. Hello? I mean, _buon giorno_?" 

" _Buon pomeriggio_." The woman inclined her head to Adam, then to Kris. "You are not, as you say, Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs," the woman said in a husky voice. "Are you lost, do you think?"

"I..." Kris hesitated, then shrugged. There were two of them and one of her. "Not really. I mean, I think I found what I was looking for, but it's not here any more." He paused and muttered, "Been there, done that recently." He started when Adam's hand reached for his and squeezed reassuringly. "But I found my way back, anyway. It's all good. In fact, it's perfect."

The woman's head bent slightly as if she were looking at their clasped hands, then raised back up. "What were you seeking?"

"A... green door," Kris answered. 

"A green door?" The woman snapped instantly. "It was green, you are sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. Ma'am," Kris finished, remembering the manners his mother had taught him.

"You do not know?"

"Apparently not," Adam answered cautiously. The woman seemed harmless, his Spidey senses weren't tingling or anything, but really she had appeared out of freaking nowhere on this tiny back canal in the fog. But then again, the fog did muffle noise, so she could have been walking up to them and the two of them had been kissing, so...

"Are you paying attention?" The woman asked, her voice sharp.

"Yes. My apologies. I was thinking."

"Happy thoughts, yes?" The woman waved her hand toward his face. "You looked happy."

"Yes." Adam smiled as he watched the sparkles from her rings. "I was thinking of kissing my boyfriend here on this little street in Venice. It's..." Adam felt himself blush, then shrugged. "Romantic. Venice. And being here with my boyfriend. We were separated, but now we're back together and when you come close to losing something..." He froze, wondering why he was telling this stranger in a costume their story, but... something about her...

"When you come close to losing something, it's taste is so much the sweeter when you find it? Ah. _Si. Storia d'amore._ Is good. But of course it is, because you were went through the green door and found what you were seeking, little man?"

"I'm not little!" Kris protested. "And what's the deal with the green door? Where is it? Is this some kind of weird funhouse trick the locals play on tourists?"

The woman laughed and shook her head. "No. It is the legend of _la porta verde._ I can tell you this, if you wish?"

"I wish!" Kris exclaimed. It was probably a weird funhouse trick the locals had played on them, but no harm, no foul.

" _Bene. C'era una volta_..."

"I'm sorry," Adam said, tamping down his impatience with effort. They had been separated and were now back together. They had weeks and weeks of separation to make up for and he didn't want to waste a moment. He just wanted to get back to the hotel now and play some more with Kris' nipple ring. "But we don't speak Italian, so could you tell us what you said?"

"It is the legend of the green door." The woman gestured toward the seams of the buildings where there was not a green door. "It begins as all good stories do with _c'era una volta._ Once upon a time, a boy fell in love with a girl, deeply in love. But alas, they were not allowed to marry."

"Why? Was there a rule against it?" Adam asked. 

"No. He was promised to another by his parents. They had plans for his future. That did not include this girl, whose family could add nothing to the family pride or coffers. He was a dutiful son, so he did his duty and married the other woman."

"He shoulda run for the hills. I know that for _sure_. Sometimes your best choice is to leave and go someplace better. That's what he shoulda done," Kris said quickly. "And taken his true love with him."

"Ah. The dilemma of duty versus love. Which path does an honorable man choose?" The woman pointed to the left, then the right. "How does a good man know where honor lies?"

"I get it, depends upon how you define honor," Kris said. 

"And what's more important -- pride or happiness," Adam added.

Kris nodded. "So he got married, but what happened to her?"

"She came to Venice, _La Serenissima._ Became a _cortigiana_. Famous, in fact," the woman answered. "Many people visited her, her rooftop garden was a salon for many of the most learned and amusing people in the Republic. She had everything a _cortigiana_ could want, except love. But of course, a _cortigiana_ did not expect that in life. Security was better than love, as she had learned when her lover deserted her." 

"What's a corti..." Kris asked. "That word?"

"Courtesan?" Adam asked. "She was a courtesan?"

"Like Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rouge." Kris nodded. "Got it. High-priced whore." He was proud he'd said that word without a flinch especially when Adam gave him a concerned look. 

"A _cortigiana_ was more than that," the woman explained. "She was a companion of the mind, as well as the body and... But no matter. She had been gifted with a beautiful small palazzo by one of her benefactors, well-hidden, discreet, as was the custom. The only hint of the wealth found within was the ornate carving over the door." 

"Carving over the door? A green door? An arched green door?" Kris asked quickly, looking back over his shoulder to where the door should be. But wasn't.

" _Si._ " The woman nodded, her ringlets rigidly bobbing in the foggy air.

Adam wondered what kind of pomade or hairspray that wig was using, because damn, its ability to hold a curl in this humidity was impressive. "So, anyway, what happened? Did they reunite?"

"Get a... second chance?" Kris asked slowly and heard Adam's small indrawn hiss of breath and felt the still rigidity of his body.

"A second chance. Because his wife died. Eventually. Many years later. And so he was finally free. He raced here to Venice to find his true love. Assuming she would be free, telling himself she would be, she had to be. He came here, to her door, her green door, but it had a black wreath on it. And he knew. She had found another sort of freedom."

"Knew what?" Kris snapped, feeling a chill sent prickles of unease up his spine.

"That she was dead." The woman sliced her finger across her throat.

Adam asked, "From what?"

"Alas, bad fish."

" _Food poisoning?_ " Kris asked incredulously. He'd been expecting some grand ending, like a stabbing by a jealous wife, but instead her death had just been... bad luck.

"Yes. She was dead, carried away to _il Cimitero di Venezia_ by Charon the boatman."

"Charon the boatman?" Kris asked, his mouth agape. He sidestepped and wiggled under Adam's arm. "I'm gettin' freaked here."

"But not afraid? For surely you have already faced fears and hardships and survived, have you not? Difficulties that make this story just a story, no?"

"Actually, yes." Kris nodded. "Twice in my life, I thought it was over. But it wasn't. I just had to keep on truckin'." Kris laughed to himself as he thought of the Grateful Dead song by the same name and... yes, what a long, strange trip this had been. 

"He had to keep on moving on his journey," Adam supplied when the woman tilted her head as if confused and the hidden little bells chimed. 

"I see. So yes, you kept on... truckin'. But this man could not keep on his journey. It had ended too soon and he did not get his second chance. Tragic, no?"

"No. I mean, yes. Tragic," Kris agreed softly. He and Adam had almost not gotten their second chance. Adam had swallowed his pride and Kris had fought back and those choices, those actions had given them a second chance. 

"The man was so distraught -- he had missed his second chance -- what could be worse? To be so close, but so far? A distance unable to be bridged, here in the city of bridges? The irony, no? In his passion, in his despair he threw himself into the canal. And drowned."

As the woman paused as if waiting for some bell of doom, Kris shrugged. "Well, that sucks."

"I do not..." The woman stomped her foot. "Listen to me. The man threw himself into the canal. Right here!" 

Adam and Kris took a joined step backward until their shoulders banged against the hard stone of the building behind them. 

"There is a legend..." She began. "That in times of the most dire need, during Carnevale, because of _Carnevale stregoneria---_ "

"Pardon me," Adam said with a smile. "Again, we don't speak Italian..."

"It means Carnevale magic, sorcery." The woman gracefully waved her hand through the air, made a loose fist, then snapped her fingers open. A light mist of orange glitter floated away almost instantly. She pointed at the buildings behind the two men. "The walls will part and a portal will open. An old arched, green door--""

"A green door!"

" _Si. La porta verde._ And that over the door is a frame, stone with carvings."

"Yes! The carving was very fragile, like it had been there for centuries and over time the weather had worn it away."

"Do you remember what it said?" The woman prompted.

Kris bit his lip as he thought. "Well, it was in Italian, so I don't know what it said. I remember the word, _qui_ , which I figured meant 'here'. And somethin' about convenience..."

"Was it this? _Qui si convien lasciare ogne sospetto; ogne viltà convien che qui sia morta_?"

"That sounds right," Kris said slowly, closing his eyes to try and see the door in his mind. "Yeah. It was really foggy and the carving was really old, but yeah."

Adam clamped his hand on Kris' shoulder and moved slightly in front of him. " _Morta?_ That sounds like death to me?"

"Ah. A little one perhaps."

Kris and Adam looked at each other and then back at the woman, whose throaty laughter rolled underneath the fog like uneven cobblestones. "Do not worry, my friends. I am not here to hurt you. The saying is from Dante, _il Poeta_. I would translate the line over the door as 'Here you must leave all distrust behind and end all fear."'

"What does that mean?" Adam snapped.

"You are protective and skeptical, aren't you?"

"He used to be romantic," Kris whispered, sadly. "Believed in fate and destiny."

"Ah. _Destino_." The woman nodded. "Sometimes destiny needs a little push."

"That's what I think!" Kris nodded. "So the rest of the legend?"

"Ah yes. The legend says that when a couple who is fated to be together has been ripped asunder and finds themselves in Venice during Carnevale, the fates will part the stones. The green door will open so that one of them will enter and leaving behind all fear, will be given a second chance."

"This is..." Adam opened his mouth, then closed it. He stared at the woman.

"This has been your second chance, yes?" The woman asked. "Did you seek and find, _chi cerca trova_ , as you were both instructed?"

"Yessss..." Adam agreed slowly. "It's just a little hard to believe. Even with the world's biggest hat bopping me in the face every time I turn around, even in --" He bit off the word, bed.

Kris nodded enthusiastically. He didn't know what was going on, but he knew that the old guy had given him a push he'd needed, so he wasn't looking a gift horse in the mouth or... hat in the brim. "The old guy, he gave me a book," Kris remembered suddenly and reached around for his backpack. "He wrote in it." Pulling out the red-leather bound volume, he opened it and showed the first page to Adam. "See? It's proof. But I don't speak Italian."

"I will translate for you, if you wish?" The woman asked. "A pen?"

"Sure." Kris smiled and fished in his backpack for a pen and handed it to her. 

The woman flipped open the book and read it. "Dante again. From _La Vita Nuova_." She balanced the book on her arm, wrote in it with the other. Finishing, she snapped the book closed. "You have been blessed with the green door and the second chance. You read this now. Listen to it." 

"Thank you -- I mean, _grazie_ ," Kris said softly as he took the book and pen back from the woman.

"My pleasure." The woman inclined her head and the little bells chimed. "Now, read."

Adam and Kris bent their heads over the book. 

_In quella parte del libro de la mia memoria dinanzi a la quale poco si potrebbe leggere, si trova una rubrica la quale dice: Incipit vita nova._

In that book which is  
My memory...  
On the first page  
That is the chapter when  
I first met you  
Appear the words...  
Here begins a new life.

"A new life, here begins a new life..." Kris repeated. "We could write our songs in here, ya know? Our songs that tell our story, don't they?"

"They do," Adam agreed. Running his hand gently along the curled edge of the book cover, Adam felt the embossed leather rise and fall under his fingertips. "This book is totally old school though. I feel like we should start our new book, our new life with something equally old school."

"Like what? A madrigal?" Kris laughed, looking up at the Renaissance-era buildings above them. The...what were the words... palazzos and castellos looked back at him, the windows with their lacy carved edges winking in the sunlight. Oh, finally. Sunlight! 

"Mmm... I was thinking of starting a song out as a lament and then as the singer tells the story, it changes quickly into something happier as the singer realizes he was being a damn fool."

"Yeah, I think I'd have the life experience could write something like that," Kris said drily. "And I'd be down with doing a song that splits, that's so Paul McCartney. Maybe even use the story the silver lady told us -- starting with the phrase once upon a time?"

"Or the Italian version of it?" Adam asked, enjoying talking with Kris about song construction, just like always. "How did that go again? I wonder..." Adam began, then turned around to ask the woman, only to see the flash of an edge of silver lace flicking around the corner like a whisper, gone in the fog. He shook his head and raced forward, spinning around the corner and froze, nearly toppling over as he found himself on the edge of a canal, nearly falling into water. "What the hell?"

Grabbing Adam's arm and pulling him back from the edge, Kris looked curiously up and down the canal. Nothing to see. "What is it?" 

"It's just water here. Where did she go?"

"Oh, no shit! I..." Kris looked at the canal. Not even a ripple in the water. "And what about her bells? I didn't hear her bells."

"Even if she got into a boat, it didn't have time to get away..." Adam shivered. "It's like she was a ghost."

"Not a ghost or a haint. A spirit." Kris nodded. "There's a difference. Important difference."

"Who taught you this? Pearline? Why are you getting all southern on me?"

"Because southerners know how to tell a good story too. And you hafta know the difference between visits from the underworld. A ghost is just hangin' around, gettin' off on scarin' people. A haint is a ghost, but more like a lost soul. But a spirit, well, now they have a job to do and they're gonna do it."

Adam stared at Kris. "Sometimes... you scare me. It's like a Tennessee Williams play come to life."

"Well, I've always relied on the kindness of strangers..." Kris said in a slow drawl. He grinned at the disbelieving look Adam's face always got when Kris or Cale displayed what Adam thought was weird southernisms. Or tried to get him to eat grits or hush puppies. Or his personal favorite -- the time his mom had coaxed Adam into trying chitlins without telling him what it was. Taking pity on him, Kris slipped his hand into Adam's and squeezed. "But speaking of strangers, that woman? Do you think... Ya know, your first thought was that one of our people was playing a trick on us, right? So that woman -- do you think it was one of them?"

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that. I was..." Adam smiled sheepishly. "Kind of enjoying the mystery of it." 

"Well... It could have been Lane. You know how she's always wanted to play Sydney Bristow and dress up and fool everyone on some secret mission," Kris suggested. He shrugged. "Then again, it could be Dani. She loves playing dress up as much as you do. And she's the third member of our parental trinity. So... Dani? But the voice didn't sound like either of them. So..."

"Teresa? Or even my mother. Who could tell with that dress on?"

"Hell, it could've been a drag queen," Kris pointed out. "Except..."

"Except...how did they know we'd go back there?"

"Or even be able to find the place?"

"Or when we'd go to look for it?" Adam asked.

"And where are my doubloons? And where did the green door go?"

"The door? How about the whole shop?" 

"Maybe we're just lost. Maybe I didn't find the right little street. Maybe there is a green door and a narrow little costume shop somewhere. Or maybe..."

"Or maybe... it was just a little bit of magic."

"Maybe, it was," Kris agreed after a long moment looking into Adam's hopeful eyes. Suddenly Adam's eyes narrowed as he looked over Kris head. Looking up and seeing Adam staring past him at the narrow canal with its dark red buildings and green water gently lapping at the edges, Kris narrowed his eyes and blinked. "Was that, is that... orange glitter in the air?"

"I...I think so. What's up with the orange glitter?" 

"I made this wish on my chair when I was at the house delivering the ice cream cake."

"I remember. Food is love. Eat. I love you. Eat me."

Kris blinked in surprise as Adam recited the cake's inscription. "Yeah. A little bit of Alice in Wonderland and down the rabbit hole, a little bit of ice cream and a lot of love."

"Perfect. And so... yeah, there was orange glitter on the chair. When I sat in it, I got orange glitter all over me. And you made a wish." 

"And it came true." Kris smiled, then suddenly felt his body relax as surety swamped him with relief and understanding. He'd made that wish, what some might call a prayer and God had answered his prayer. He needed to count his blessings and have faith in the path ahead.

"It's not that I don't believe you," Adam began carefully. He wanted to believe, but... "But surely, you have to see that it's a little...weird. Then again, what's that line from Hamlet? 'There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.'"

"I was thinking of the Bible. Second Corinthians 4:18." Kris grinned. "Yeah, I used to love candy." He slid his hand around Adam's neck and pulled him down for a soft kiss, then made Adam gasp when he slowly licked Adam's lower lip. "Now you're the sweetest taste in my life. But the scripture says, 'So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.' Because I do love you, forever."

"I love you too, forever." Adam took off his hat once again to bend down and kiss Kris softly, then slowly licked the taste of Kris' kiss on his lips. This second chance was sweet. "Maybe we should just count it as a little bit of magic," Adam whispered. "The universe righting itself."

"Maybe it was our destiny to get together in a coffee shop and the universe was righting itself to make sure it happened -- after we learned our lessons, not once but twice."

"Considering how stubborn we both can be?" Adam laughed. "Ha. Sounded like both our moms, didn't I? But yeah, maybe we did need to learn those lessons. I needed to learn patience and you needed to get more confidence. We _both_ needed to have more faith. So...maybe..."

Kris smiled and threw his arms around Adam. "Maybe it's God's will or just a little bit of magic." 

"Do you think so?" Adam asked hopefully. He wanted to believe in destiny and fate and that he and Kris had been meant to meet. And...maybe in the end, that was a choice. To believe in love, whichever way it came -- it was a miracle.

Kris nodded, taking off his hat so he could rubbing his cheek against Adam's shoulder. Oh god, it felt so good to do that again. "I do. I know, the moment I met you, I felt ...magic." He looked up and yes, Adam's eyes were warm and happy, his face joyful. And maybe that was the real magic -- making someone happy. "Or maybe it was all that glitter around you."

"You're the one with glitter. Orange glitter," Adam noted, as he flicked Kris' feather and watched the sparkling orange motes flutter away in a damp, silent breeze.

"Which I got here." Kris nodded. "I'm sure of it. But you know what?"

Adam lifted Kris' backpack up and handed it to him. "Time to move on? To that new life?"

"Yeah."

"Good. Let's get back to the hotel so Dani can help me give you that belated Valentine's Day present." 

"We're gonna get lost again," Kris warned.

Adam took Kris' hand and held it up. "No. We're not. Never again."

"You're right. Let's just follow the bells to St. Mark's."

 

"Hey, look who I found! But maybe I didn't find my daughter..." Adam teased as he picked his daughter up and swung her around in a small circle. "Because this beautiful young lady looks like a princess!"

"I am your daughter! Doesn't matter what I wears, still your Emmaline! But I _do_ look like a princess, don't I?" Emmaline agreed, once Adam put her back on the ground. She patted the tiara on her head to make sure it was still in place. "You look like a prince. Or a pirate. Where you big boys been? All the boys are gone."

"I don't know where the rest of them are, but your father and I had to see a...fairy godmother about a... book," Kris answered. "What've you ladies been doing?"

"Shopping." Lane smiled and held up a bag from Pucci, while Kim showed a mask.

"That's it?" Adam asked incredulously. "My mom went to Venice and didn't buy anything? I must be adopted!" 

"Or maybe I just know to shop efficiently," Leila teased back. 

Kim pointed at her mask. "If you want to buy something, take Teresa with you. She speaks fluent Italian and knows how to haggle. Leila and she went off together and came back a couple of hours later with the most amazing stuff. You should see it."

Leila smiled. "Sometimes it pays to get off the beaten track. And bring along someone who knows how to bargain. Wait 'til you see the mask Teresa haggled on for me." 

Teresa smiled. "We had a great time. So great we had to take a trip back to the hotel to drop it off before meeting up with the rest of our gang of girls here." 

"But what about you, Dani?" Adam asked. 

"Emmaline and I chose matching necklaces at a glass shop which are in my purse, but she really wants a _lamp._ " Dani laughed as she pointed towards the storefront window. "Look at that thing." 

"Dadakiss, that big lamp matches your feather and the mushie chair back home!" Emmaline pointed to a bright orange Murano glass chandelier in a store window. "The mushie chair," she emphasized, knowing that Dadakiss how he loved that chair. "We should get the lamp for the music room. It matches!"

"Wow, that's huge." Kris stared in amazement. He'd never seen anything like it before. "Really reallly big. I like it. A lot."

"Really, Kris, in front of the child? Tsk, tsk..." Adam teased in a low tone, grinning when Kris and Dani both broke into laughter.

"Youse are having secrets." Emmaline pouted. 

"Well, I believe that you know something Dadakiss doesn't," Dani reminded her.

"Oooh! I do. Let's go play that catching game!" Emmaline urged, reaching out to take Kris' hand and pull him away from the window. " _Andiamo!"_ She giggled. "I like that word." 

"What will we be searching for? More doubloons?" Kris asking, laughing as Emmaline tugged him past the side of St. Mark's and then turned left. She knew the way. And a little child shall lead them, Isaiah 11: 6, he thought. He looked over his shoulder at the domes of the huge basilica and realized that he'd finally gotten to a place where his faith felt right again, where it wasn't about punishment and exclusion, but about insight and comfort, a safe place. Faith had become real again.

"No. The belated Valentine's Day present," Adam supplied, waving goodbye to Lane, Teresa and the two mothers. He shook his head as Leila blew him a kiss, then beckoned the others with her finger and began whispering. His mom always knew the secrets.

"Great! Because I wasn't sure how much longer I was going to be able to keep it in."  
Dani smiled as Adam put his arm around her and followed Emmaline and Kris on the short walk back to the hotel.

"Hi, _Signor Port...ee...eerie!_ " Emmaline called out as the doorman opened the entrance door for them. 

" _Buona sera, Signorina_ Emmalina!" The doorman responded with a big smile. 

"How does he know her name?" Adam asked sharply.

"She introduced herself earlier, wanted to try her version of Italian, Mr. Paranoid," Dani told him with a shrug. 

"It's pretty!" Emmaline made her hand gesture through the air like she was riding waves. "The sound rolls."

"You have a good ear," Kris noted.

"A rich ear too," the doorman said with a smile, reaching behind Emmaline's ear and pulling back to show her a coin. When Emmaline giggled and clapped, he handed her the coin. "Do you like your room, _piccola principessa?_ " The doorman asked.

"I don't think I like the people on my ceiling," Emmaline told him. "They stare at me. Their eyes never close."

"Ah, but they are angels, looking down on you and keeping you safe while you sleep!" 

"They're watching too hard. They need to back off a little." Emmaline nodded emphatically. "I kicked a pap, you know."

"I did not! You are a fierce _principessa_ indeed!" 

"Who needs to learn not to kick people," Kris told Emmaline as they waved to the doorman and walked to the elevator, but with a betraying twitch of his lips. His little princess was fierce indeed. He wondered what she was going to be like when she grew up? Well, he knew that no guy was going to push her around the way Neil Allen had pushed his mother around for years and that? Was a damn good thing.

"UncaNeil said I should've kicked harder."

"I bet he did." Kris shook his head. 

"Emmaline, are you ready to play the hot and cold game with Dadakiss?" Adam asked a few minutes later as they entered Dani and Emmaline's room.

"Lord knows, I am," Dani muttered under her breath.

"How long have you been planning this present?" Kris asked, turning from Dani's obvious impatience to Adam. He read the excitement in Adam's eyes as one of lengthy anticipation. Hmm. A long plan. He put his backpack aside and looked up. 

"Since the island."

"The island!" Kris exclaimed in surprise. 

"Yeah and it's been killing me," Adam confided. "I planned it with Dani. It's for us too, not just you, actually. It's a family gift."

Kris stared at Adam, trying to read his face. Adam wasn't one to keep a secret or not for very long.... unlike himself. "But why didn't you just give it to me at Christmas?"

"Dani didn't tell me she, it..."

"Oh for godssakes!" Dani exclaimed. "Emmaline, start Kris on his little hunt, please?"

"Finally! I helped hide it." Emmaline clapped her hands and patted Kris' leg. "Go on!"

Sprawling in a wingback chair that was considerably sturdier than anything in his suite, Adam watched Kris poke around the room as Emmaline nearly jumped up and down with glee at getting to direct her father around. "Cold, cold!" she told him as he opened a closet door and jumped back as a silver dress bumped him.

Dani laughed at the look on Kris' face. "It's not alive. It's just a hoop."

"A hoop?" Kris asked, glancing over his shoulder at Adam.

Adam closed his eyes and shook his head. If the silver lady had been Dani, he didn't want to know. He liked his mystery just the way it was. Plus, Dani had been with Emmaline all afternoon. Plus, plus, he'd helped Dani pick out the lace trim for her gown and it was a dark pink that coordinated with Emmaline's dress. He opened his eyes again as Emmaline pointed towards the bathroom, only to dissolve in giggles when she could once again call out, "Cold, still cold!"

Patiently walking around the room, followed by his beloved little girl, Kris stopped when she suddenly cried out, "Warmer!" He took a careful step towards a nightstand, grinning when Emmaline continued, "Even warmer!" 

When Kris put his hand on a long but narrow gilt-covered box, he flinched dramatically and waited. Clearly the box had to be a gold version of a geocaching box. 

"Hot, hot!" Emmaline shrieked in excitement. "Burning!" She yelled, then clapped her palm over her mouth and mumbled from behind her hand, "Inside voice in hotels 'specially important, I know."

Kris flipped open the box and peered inside, gingerly pulling out a white plastic stick. He stared at it quizzically noting the + sign on a tiny read-out screen. He shook it, then looked over at Adam. "This is my Valentine's Day gift?"

"From the both of us," Dani explained.

"Yeah, kinda couldn't have done it without her," Adam joked, standing up to give her a hug. "Or rather, we both wanted to give it to you, not that we both didn't want it as well--"

"What is this... Is this..." Kris gaped and then looked up. "Is this a pregnancy test?"

"Yes!" Dani yelped impatiently. 

"You... we... baby?" Kris spluttered and frozen in shock. "OHMIGOD! A BABY!" He flung his hands in the air in excitement and the box went in one direction and the pregnancy test stick in another direction. 

"I think he's excited, don't you?" Adam asked Emmaline.

"We having a baby?" Emmaline asked, her eyes wide. "Well, I wanted a puppy, but a baby's good too. You squeaked _and_ shouted and threw stuff, Dadakiss!" She giggled. "Inside voice."

"Is this real life?" Kris asked, his eyes flashing between Adam and Dani.

"No." Adam smiled, then sang, "Is this real life or is this just fantasy?"

"Given how many times I've lost my breakfast, I'd say it was real life," Dani said drily. 

"So we're having a baby?"

"Yes, we're having a baby!" Dani exclaimed, then grunted as Kris flung his arms around her and squeezed tight while kissing her cheek. 

"When, how? Wait. A turkey baster was used and I was not involved?" Kris complained with a wink in Dani's direction. "My opportunity to use that turkey baster--"

Dani burst out laughing at the look of horror on Adam's face. "No turkey baster. Although the doctor did use something that looked--"

"TMI!" Adam called out. "Emmaline, come with me and I'll tell you a story about these angels so they're not so scary. How does that sound?"

"Tell me the story again of when I was born instead, please?" Emmaline asked. "I like the part where Dadakiss faints. Is he gonna faint again? I wanna see him go boom!" 

"Great." Kris sighed and sat down on the bed, pulling Dani next to him. "I was such a wuss."

"Hey, I wouldn't have minded being out of it when they were basically punching my stomach to get the afterbirth out, all that goopiness and blood--" Dani said slowly, bursting into laughter when Kris' eyes grew comically wide and he turned pale. Taking pity on him, she patted his hand and told him, "I'm due in September. Which will give you plenty of time for the game plan Adam's got worked out."

"What? But that means... Why..." Kris looked at Adam talking to Emmaline, confused at the timing. "When did you know? When did..." 

Dani nodded. "He came back from the island, admitting he'd just been scared about having another kid, but did want one. We talked about it and decided to set it up and tell you for Christmas, if it worked right away and if not, hopefully for Valentine's Day. It didn't, let's say, work the first time, but it did the second time. I didn't tell _him_ until after Leno," Dani explained carefully. "He had enough on his mind and well, it's better not to tell until you're a little further along anyway. But I want you to know straight from me, that he came back from the island and told me right away that he was ready to have another baby. So no matter what, this baby was very much wanted. Did we surprise you?"

"Well, you did that!" Kris admitted with a laugh, then got up to pick up the box and the pregnancy test. "It's lucky I didn't throw this box right threw a window or something."

"You get very excitable sometimes for such a laidback guy," Dani noted with s smile. 

"He's my hedgehog." Adam reached over to run a hand over Kris' messy hair and then sighed happily when Kris kissed his hand. He closed his hand over the kiss and then resumed telling the story to Emmaline.

"I've made a new resolution though, that Adam and I will not get excitable at the same time," Kris told Dani in a low tone as he sat back down on the bed.

"Well, that'll put quite the damper on your sex life." 

Kris giggled and Dani began to laugh as well and fell onto their back. Lying there, looking at the ceiling Kris had to agree with Emmaline had way too many angels staring at you. He squeezed Dani's hand and asked, "Dani, how about this business of wanting two or _four_ kids? Two,I get. But _four_? You and I always wanted a big family, but he always twitched at the thought of a second! He argued against having another child and then in the coffee shop here in that do over, he tells me he wants two or four--"

Dani put her hand on Kris' arm to forestall his excited babbling. "But not three. Jan Brady syndrome?" Dani asked with a grin.

"Yeah. What the hell? He's not really taking life advice from the Brady Bunch? Is he?"

"No." Dani lowered her voice. "Worse."

"Worse? Wait-- you mean, Brad?"

Dani giggled. "You betcha. Brad was around, he's always been around. And he was going on about fulfillment, especially that day of your second billboard. I was there early that morning when he started -- he said that Adam would be or is fulfilled by three things."

"Ohmigod. He said that to me too. _Years_ ago. Performing music, having sex and..." Kris stopped, then grinned. "Being a father. Which is so true. I don't know why Adam was so worried about having another kid -- he's so great at it." 

"According to my girlfriends and our moms, it's really common to have those fears. And as usual, being a guy, he didn't talk about it. Then again, you two didn't talk about some other scary stuff, did you?"

"Uh-oh. Are you about to lecture me?" Kris asked. "Because, I _promise_ , we've both learned our lessons." He crossed his heart and then held up his hand.

"Nope. I'm not your mother. I'm your friend."

"And family partner," Kris added, moving his hand towards her and when Dani nodded, gently placed it over her abdomen. "I'm so happy."

"I can see it right here." Dani's fingertip touched the smile lines at the side of Kris' mouth and the crinkles outside his eyes. Then placing her hand on his chest, she finished, "And feel it here. But Brad? Well, actually, he amended that statement of his from years ago." Dani smiled and patted Kris' hand. "Back then Brad said Adam'd be fulfilled by being a family man -- being a husband, father, best friend to me... creating his own little family."

"Not so little though, because Adam doesn't do anything little." Kris wiggled his eyebrows. "Take it from me, I know." 

"Is that why you ended up with the world's biggest feather in your hat? Because Adam doesn't do anything small?"

"What do you think?" 

"I actually thought it was some sort of compensatory mechanism. You know, how short guys are always driving big trucks with oversized wheels. To prove their dicks aren't teeny tiny and--"

"ADAM!" Kris looked up at Adam as he and Emmaline paused in front of them. "Dani's pickin' on me." 

"Is it because you fainted, Dadakiss? Get tough!" Emmaline asked with a grin, then leapt from Adam's arms onto Kris.

"MpfUmph! I think you're going to be a stuntwoman when you grow up!" Kris noted, hugging Emmaline to him before she wiggled away to jump on the bed. "And give me grey hair."

"Better than no hair at all," Dani said with a grin.

"You are so awful to me!" Kris complained but with a wide smile of his own. "And I can't do anything to you for months. When are you due again?"

"September 5th or so," Dani answered. "And Adam has a masterplan."

"He always does." Kris smiled. 

"Humph. Plans can be good things. The date is great. It leaves us enough time to work on _your_ cd, get it finished and go on the road with it for a bit," Adam explained. "The plan worked out perfectly."

"Yes, Mr. Control Freak." Dani shook her head fondly, then gasped when Kris flung his arms around her and squeezed tightly once again. She hugged him back, smiling when she felt tears on her neck from Kris' face.

"Let's get into that hug," Adam suggested. He sat next to Dani on the bed and he and Emmaline wrapped their arms around Dani and Kris and they all held onto each other.

"What an amazing, strange, wonderful trip this has been," Kris whispered into Adam's ear. "Amazing."

"This is more than a do over," Adam agreed, grinning as Dani tickled his side and Emmaline jumped up and down on the bed. "It's..."

"A new life. In more ways than one. What was it in my book?"

"New life... _La vita nuova_ ," Adam remembered.

"Can we go back out and get that orange lamp?" Emmaline asked.

 

 

"So what do you think about Emmaline's taste in lamps?" Adam asked as they stopped before yet another glass shop the next day.

"I do like that big ass orange Murano lamp," Kris admitted. "I'd like to buy it, but..." He paused and flushed. "But I'm out of money."

"Luckily, I'm not." Adam swung Kris' hand as he moved down the narrow pathway, careful not to fall into the water. The sun had set and the moonlight had not penetrated the edges of the walkway. "You said the therapist told you that people who've been hungry are often hoarders, but didn't you spend your money over and over?"

"I did," Kris agreed. "She said it was because my fear was in conflict with my generous spirit." He looked up and winked.

"Hmm. Well, I suppose I can attest to that. Your spirit was quite generous, up against the wall, on the stairs and in the shower..." Adam laughed in delight as he remembered the day behind and the future before them.

Kris grinned and bumped shoulders with Adam, laughing when their hats bumped as well, setting their feathers fluttering. "As long as I'm not looking up at those angels on the ceiling. Now that Emmaline pointed it out, they _are_ kinda staring at us." Kris paused as they reached a bridge and looked up at Adam.

"Like the doorman said, they're just angels watching over us, keeping us safe." Adam tugged on Kris' hand and led him onto a bridge. They could get lost for a while before they had to get found.

 

"It's another ball!" Emmaline said excitedly just blocks away as they walked from their hotel towards St. Mark's Square. "Another day, another dress." 

"A girl after my own heart!" Dani laughed. 

"Last day, Dadakiss found out we having a new baby. Last night, Uncale and Aunty Laney got engaged. What's gonna happen _tonight_?" Emmaline asked. "It should be something big, because my dress is even bigger tonight!" She pulled at one side of her dress, sending the hoop skirt rocking. She giggled when the edge hit a man in an elaborate costume who started, then made a deep bow in front of her and swept off his hat. She smiled and waved as he moved off into the deep crowds. "A pirate just bowed to me. I wish Dadakiss had seen it. He needs to get here fast. He likes pirates. But what else can happen tonight?" She asked eagerly. 

Leila smiled down at her. "A good question." She looked up at the half moon, bright in the sky over the bell tower of St. Mark's Square and the pink-hued lights of the piazzetta. "It seems like a night for romance, doesn't it?"

"Dadakiss has a ring for Dadam..." Emmaline whispered to her grandmother.

"I know," Leila whispered back. "Dadam wants to get married too."

"I hope they have a horse-drawn carriage," Kim confided. She had her ideas for the wedding too. "I went to a wedding at Disney World a few years ago and they got married in front of the castle and had a carriage. Adam will go for it, I bet." She sighed when Leila shook her head, before pointing to a storefront and heading over to it, then disappearing in the colorful crowd. 

"Well, there's a castle!" Emmaline pointed at the domed basilica of St. Mark's. "And look at all the princesses!" she cried out, her eyes wide. "Mama, my 'graph book? We forgots it! Or does Auntie Laney have it in one of her big totes?" She frowned as everyone above her looked around and commented on all the costumes. Auntie Laney had a pretty costume for tonight, but she was late, late, late for a very 'portant date. Auntie Laney had been all snuggly with Uncale ever since he'd asked her to marry him on that gondola ride. Aunty Laney had been surprised because she thought he was going to do it at a ball. And now they were missing again; Mama had said they needed alone time. Ha. They could have alone time anytime. It was party time now.

"Emmaline..." Dani laughed softly at Emmaline's endless energy. "This isn't Disneyland. They're not princesses who sign autographs. They're just people like you and me in costumes. Like at Halloween." 

"What about her?" Emmaline pointed towards a tall woman with hair so blond as to look silver, the color blending into the gauzy tulle of some sort of hat and a silver gown glinting with glittering embroidery and inset diamonds. 

"Those are fake diamonds, aren't they?" Dani whispered to Neil.

"Must be," Neil agreed. 

Kim nodded. "No one would walk around with that much in real jewels unless they had a bodyguard or twelve and I'm not seeing any. So, fake, of course, but wow, they look real."

Emmaline pointed. Dadakiss needed her. "She's gotta be a fairy godmother." 

"Got to be," Neil corrected automatically as he watched the woman in silver carefully. Something about her... Then she looked at them and stilled. He groaned. "Uh-oh..."

"Don't be paranoid, Neil. No one's going to recognize us here," Dani argued.

Neil picked Emmaline up as the woman approached them. "It's hard to tell intent when a face is covered with a mask."

"People come up to Dadam all the time and they just want to talk to him and take his picture. Well, except for the paps people, but she doesn't have a camera and she's not screaming mean things," Emmaline pointed out. "I think she's Dadakiss' fairy godmother."

Dani smiled and patted her daughter's back. Emmaline was accustomed not only to people coming up to Adam, but she herself had the same quality that attracted people and got them talking. She rubbed her stomach and thought once again, as she had many times that she'd swear that Emmaline was Adam's daughter genetically, as well as of the heart. 

"Are you a princess?" Emmaline asked, tilting her head back to look up at the woman. "Or a fairy godmother? Where is your wand?"

"No, no," the woman asked, the ribbons of her mask flitting through the air as she shook her head. "I am a, how you say? Story-teller."

"My mama's last name is Stori! And that's my middle name!" Emmaline exclaimed. "Are we related?"

"We are all related," the woman began, then nodded as others joined them. "Speaking of which, I believe this must be your family?"

"Yup!" Emmaline nodded. "Well, mostly. My daddies are somewhere -- they always sneak off to _kiss_ , you know." She pursed her lips and made a smacking noise.

"Do they?"

"Yes. All. The. Time." Emmaline sighed. "And Uncale and Auntie Laney, I think they're off practicing getting 'gaged with alone time. And Dadakiss has a ring, so I thinks he's getting 'gaged too. With--"

"Emmaline!" Geoffrey whispered in a rush. "Shh. It's a secret." 

"So, one couple is engaged, another is off kissing. A night for romance?" The woman clapped her hands soundlessly. "Some day they will be able to tell of their own _storia d'amore._ "

"Can you tell me a story?" Emmaline asked. "Maybe with a handsome prince?"

"I would be happy to. _C'era una volta..._ "

"I'm sorry," Neil said, tamping down his impatience with effort. Damn, where was Teresa -- she was the one who spoke Italian. "But we do not speak Italian."

"Too bad. Everything sounds prettier." The woman shrugged. "As you wish. Once upon a time..." She paused.

Emmaline clapped, the sound of her hands echoing once, then stopping abruptly. "Oh goody. That's the best way to tell a story! I like stories that start with once upon a time. Yous never knows what's gonna happen then! Until the happy ending. 'Cause once upon a time has to end with happily ever after!"

" _Bene_. And may you never lose that." The woman nodded, then continued. "Once upon a time, there was a proud prince who had earned much money because he could play the violin so well the angels wept to hear him. So much money he was able to build a beautiful palazzo. More beautiful and more big than the king's palazzo. And it was across the canal from the king's palazzo."

"Uh-oh, that's not good, I bet," Emmaline suggested.

"You are correct. Because kings like to be the biggest and have the best. And the prince made an even bigger mistake! Can you guess what it was?"

"Did he..." Emmaline thought. "Did he brag about it? Because Mama and my daddies say we should not brag, right?" She wiggled until Uncle Neil put her down, but kept a hand on her shoulder.

" _Si!_ He bragged. He put a sign across the front of his palazzo that said, Money Can Buy You Everything. And the king saw this sign and got worried. He had soldiers bring the prince to him and asked if he had so much money that he could hire people to make the king disappear. The prince became nervous now and said, 'Oh no, I would never do that.'  
'But you could do that,' the king said. 'And you could hire soldiers to storm my castle and take over our land!'  
'But I would not do that, the prince cried out, suddenly afraid that he would be locked up in prison.  
'Well,' said the king, looking out the window at the beautiful palazzo and having a bright idea. 'If money can buy you everything, then can it buy you a way into seeing my daughter?'  
The prince gasped in horror as he saw the trap. 'Your daughter -- why, she has been locked up in the castle her whole life, no one has seen her! And she is guarded day and night by one hundred soldiers who are loyal only to you!" The prince complained. 'How could I see her?'  
'That is now your problem, you who thinks money can buy everything.' The king smiled. 'You have three days to see my daughter. If you can do it, you can ask her to marry you. If you cannot, then I will throw you in prison and take your palazzo for myself!'"

"He tricked him!" Emmaline said. "He just wants his palace and his money!"

" _Si!_ " The woman nodded her head. "So do you think the prince figured out a way to see the king's daughter?"

"Tell me, please!" Emmaline urged, clapping her hands.

"The prince went back to his beautiful palazzo and flung himself down on the bed, moaning in despair. How could he see the princess? She was too well guarded! The prince's old nursemaid heard him moaning--"

Emmaline raised her hand. "Excuse me, story lady, what is a nursemaid?"

"It's like your preschool teacher -- someone who takes care of you when you're little," Kim explained. "Go on, please."

"Wait. Is this nursemaid the fairy godmother?" Emmaline asked. "Because she should be. I like fairy godmothers." 

"As you wish, _bambina_. I will call her the nursemaid, but when you re-tell the story, you can call her the fairy godmother, okay? The nursemaid, she comes to the prince and says, 'Why are you moaning and crying? Get up! You have work to do today, no lying in bed!' But the prince he moaned and cried some more and would not get up. The nursemaid went away and went to the piazza to hear what the gossip was. She was dismayed when she heard the news. She waited for the prince to emerge from his room, but he did not. The next morning she went back into him and hit him upside the head." The woman made a slapping motion to the side of Neil's head without hitting him, giving a husky chuckle when he jumped back.

"The prince," the woman continued. "Shrieked, then whined, 'I am going to prison because I cannot get into see the princess! The king says I must find a way to use my money to get into see her or I will go to prison and he will take my palazzo!' The nursemaid, she got angry now. 'You won't see her by lying like a crying lump on your bed. Get up!' she yelled. 'Get up! _Andiamo!_ Let us go and find a way to see the princess!'"

"Did he get up?" Neil asked, then flushed.

"No, he did not. He just complained. So the nursemaid got very angry. She stomped off..." The woman stomped her own feet. "She was saying words how you say? Under her mouth? Then the old woman went to her room and looked around. She had a very nice room and she did not want to lose it. She liked her bed and her mirror and her music box, most of all. She went to her little music box and lifted the lid and listened to it play music. And she had..." The woman paused and held up her index finger. "An idea!"

"Oooh, my Dadam gets ideas!" Emmaline giggled. 

"So he does," Geoffrey agreed with a smile. 

"That usually get me into trouble," Neil complained.

"Ah, well, this was a good idea." The woman laughed. "The old nursemaid went to the silversmith and asked him to make a large silver goose with a gold beak. She held out her hand and dropped a gold coin into the silversmith's hand." The woman paused. "Hold out your hand, _bambina_?"

Looking at her mother, who nodded, Emmaline held out her hand and gasped when a gold coin fell into her palm. She closed her hand over it tightly. It looked just like the kind her daddies used in their 'caching game, but this was better. It had glitter around the edges. The double loon was special, from the silver lady. 

The woman nodded. "The silversmith held onto his doubloon too. That was more money than he made in a year. 'But what do I have to do?'  
"Why, make me a large goose, silver with a gold beak. By tomorrow morning!"  
'Tomorrow morning, _signora_? That is impossible!'  
'Nonsense,' the old lady laughed. 'Nothing is impossible with enough money -- I will give you another coin in the morning if you have done it.'  
The silversmith thought. With that much money, he could hire additional people to help. 'For that much money, I will do it,' he announced. And set to work. He called out and found people to work with him and they worked all night, with no sleep, the flames of the fire high and hot. In the morning, the old woman came back and what did she see?"

Emmaline answered. "A silver goose with a gold beak? The old woman was the fairy godmother! She fixed the problem."

"The problem, she is fixed." The woman nodded. "The old woman danced for joy and congratulated the silversmith. She told him to hold out his hand..." The woman waited while Emmaline once again waited for her mother's nod and then opened her hand, giggling happily when another gold coin dropped into her palm, closing it tightly once again. "And he rejoiced in the reward for his hard work. Meanwhile the old woman sent a girl--"

"Like me?" Emmaline asked, standing up straight. She could run an important errand.

"Just like you!" The woman continued. "The nursemaid sent the little girl to find the prince. 'Tell him to bring his violin,' the old woman told the little girl. The little girl ran and found the prince sitting, very sad. 'Cheer up,' the little girl told him. 'The old woman paid the silversmith and you have your goose! Bring your violin now!'  
Confused, but thinking he had, how you say, nothing to lose, the prince ran behind the little girl to the piazza and there was the silver goose with the gold beak. He was amazed. It was huge, big enough for a man to fit into. He stood there and stared at it.  
The old woman slapped him on the back of the head and told him to get into the goose."

Emmaline burst out laughing. "The fairy godmother reminds me of Gramma Weiwa. She tells Dadam and UncaNeil to do things and gets very 'ggravated with them if she thinks they don't listen."

Neil muttered, "And I've been slapped a time or two.'

"I can imagine," the woman said drily. "The nursemaid, she was aggravated with the prince too. 'Get inside! Time is leaving us! Hurry!' But the prince did not see. 'Into the goose?' The prince asked. He was confused, you see and then amazed when the old woman pushed a button and a door opened in the side of the goose. "Inside!" she yelled. "Hurry!' The prince obeyed his old nursemaid and crawled inside, banging his head and knees a few times until he sat down. Then the goose lifted and lurched and the prince realized he was being moved somewhere.  
'Now, play! Play loudly!' The old nursemaid hissed at him. 'Do as I say and play!' The prince obeyed because after all, he had no choice. He was locked in. He played and played. He heard people marveling over the silver goose with the gold beak that played beautiful music and he realized that the nursemaid had brought him to a piazza. He did not know what the nursemaid intended, but he also knew he was locked inside the goose until she let him out."

"So kept playing?" Neil asked.

" _Si._ He kept playing and then someone lifted the top of the beak and everyone gasped when the music grew louder and louder. People took turns lifting the beak. The prince heard the crowds grow larger and larger, until suddenly the crowd fell silent. He paused, then played on and suddenly heard the king's voice. 'What is this musical goose? Who knows?' Everyone cried out answers, but then the prince heard the nursemaid's voice, only it was much... how you say... wrinkly?"

"Quavery?" Eber supplied.

"Yes. Quavery. And the prince realized his nursemaid was pretending to be a sickly old woman instead of who she was."

Emmaline nodded. "I knew it! The nursemaid is a fairy godmother!" 

"As you wish." The woman continued. "The nursemaid talked in a thing voice, so the prince made his playing be _piano_..."

"He had a piano in the goose?" Emmaline asked confused.

"No, Emmaline." Neil explained, "The word _piano_ means softly in Italian. So he played the violin very softly." 

"Oh. Inside voice." Emmaline nodded. 

"The king opened the beak and the prince played very loudly indeed. The king stepped back, amazed. 'How does this goose make music?' he asked. But everyone shook their heads and did not know. 'I must know! And I must have this wondrous goose for myself! I am the king and I have what I want!" he announced and called for his servants, telling them to take the goose back to his palazzo. And who else was at that palazzo?"

"The daughter?" Geoffrey asked, shrugging when Eber elbowed him with a nod towards Emmaline. A good story was a good story and Emmaline wouldn't begrudge him a question or two of his own.

"Indeed. The daughter. So the king brought the goose into the courtyard of the palazzo and everyone gathered around. Even the princess' guards came to see this wondrous goose that played music. The princess could hear the music too and she carefully..." The woman bent slightly, put her hand out and mimed opening a doorknob. "Opened the door. And no guards!"

"So she went to the courtyard?" Neil asked.

"Yes. And there was everyone gathered around this gold and silver goose. She pulled her mask up over her face so no one would know it was her and made her way to the front, in time to hear her father -- who was only clever sometimes and no match for the old woman --"

"The fairy godmother!" Emmaline exclaimed.

"As you wish. The king tells two of his workmen to open the goose. The workmen hurried to obey and with their tools..." The woman pretended to pound a hammer and prise with a awl. "They were able to open the goose."

"And the prince popped out!" Emmaline exclaimed. "And the prince and princess saw each other and fell in love?" She began to clap, almost dropping her gold coins. She gasped and held them tightly, then handed them to her mother for safekeeping. Watching to make sure Dani put them away in her own special fabric purse, Emmaline nodded.

"You already know the story!" The woman laughed. "Yes, the prince popped out with much clatter and nearly fell to the floor because his legs were cramped from being inside the goose. The princess was so shocked to see a man pop out of a goose, she dropped her mask. The mask was porcelain and fell to the ground and shattered into a million pieces. By the time everyone looked back up, the prince and princess had looked at each other and fallen in love at first meeting."

"I knew it, I knew it!" Emmaline clapped excitedly. 

The storyteller clapped herself, the sound muffled by the gloves on her hands. "And the prince and the princess fell in love and _e vissero felici e contenti_!"

"I bet that means they lived happily ever after!" Emmaline called out, glad when the story lady nodded. 

"They did! And did you like that story?"

"Yeah!" Emmaline clapped. "But there was no magic?"

"That's true," Neil pointed out. "Just money and hard work and persistence." 

"Ah, but there you are wrong," the storyteller interjected. "The prince and princess fell madly in love and lived happily ever after. That is magic and perhaps, all of that money and hard work and persistence was a path to them meeting and falling in love? And that would be magical. True love is the greatest magic, yes?" 

"Agreed," Geoffrey nodded, then groaned when Neil began to argue.

" _Grazie,_ " Eber interjected with a glare at his son and a smile for the masked storyteller. "Thank you for entertaining my granddaughter and indeed, all of us with your story. Do we...um...owe you..." 

"No." The woman waved her hand. "Emmalina's enjoyment was payment enough. In fact, I have a gift for her..." She reached into a soft, fabric pouch and gently pulled out a tissue-wrapped packet. 

"For me?" Emmaline asked, her eyes wide. She leaned forward trying to see in the bag, laughing when the woman quickly snapped the silken cords and closed the opening. "What else is in that bag? Auntie Laney's bag is like Mary Poppins' suitcase. You never knows what's coming out!"

"Ah, but this is Carnevale! You need a mask!" The woman moved her head in Dani's direction. "With the mama's permisso?" 

"Of course." Dani smiled. She hoped Emmaline would remember this magical night. "If I could see it first?" 

The woman nodded and pulled back the tissue to show Dani. 

"Beautiful!" Dani whispered, reaching out to touch the small mask done in Emmaline's favorite pink with an Eye of Horus symbol painted in pink glitter around one eye, barely noticeable for the rest of the elaborate paintings and jewels, with a silver lace edge. Eye of Horus... Adam must have paid this woman to find them. 

"Can I... I mean, may I see it now? Please?" Emmaline begged. She gasped when the woman turned it and showed it to her, the moonlight and pink-hued lamplight making the glitter sparkle. "That is mine? Oooh, it sparkles! Just like Daddy does sometimes in concert. Or in his closet with Dadakiss." 

"Oh god..." Dani muttered, then gave up and shared a grin with Neil. That had been the last time the guys had forgotten to lock the closet door. Kris had shuddered for days even though they'd only had bare chests. And of course, Emmaline _would_ remember that. "What do you say, Emmaline?"

"Thanks... I mean..." Emmaline wrinkled her nose. "It's... _grazie! Grazie._ I got it right, right?"

"You did indeed. Mama..." The woman held it out to Dani. "You should tie it on her. Take a picture, yes?"

"Yes, yes. Thank you so much," Dani said effusively. "The mask is a work of art."

"It is nothing compared to your family," the woman shrugged. "Enjoy."

" _Grazie,_ again," Eber said while watching Emmaline's excited face and her doomed efforts to hold still while Dani tied the mask carefully onto her head. They laughed and acquiesced when Emmaline insisted upon a picture, then followed her closely as she ran to a storefront to try and see her own reflection in the glass' silver reflection.

A moment later, Emmaline tugged on Geoffrey's hand. "Where did the storyteller lady go? She was here and now? Poof! She's gone."

"I..." Geoffrey looked around from his much taller vantage height. "I don't know, sweetpea. She must be lost in the crowd."

Emmaline shook her head. "No. It was like fairy godmother in Cinderella. She was here and then went poof!"

"Emmaline..." Neil shook his head. "You know magic isn't real."

"Then why is there orange glitter in the air?" 

"Where did you get that amazing mask, young lady?" Leila asked as she joined the group, accompanied by Teresa. "What did we miss?"

"You missed a fairy godmother telling a story about money and love and magic!" Emmaline exclaimed.

"Well, you'll have to tell me the story later," Leila urged. "There is nothing better than a good romance." 

"Speaking of which..." Dani began. "Where are Adam and Kris?"

 

"Venice at night is so romantic," Kris whispered, pulling his lips reluctantly away from Adam's. "What an awesome idea, to come here." He put his hat back on.

"I know." Adam looked around at the moonlight-kissed delicate tracery of balconies, glinting wavery windows and glittering white-tipped waves. 

"This bridge..." Kris looked around, then did a doubletake. "Oh. The view. The Bridge of Sighs." Oh. The most romantic location in all of Venice. He was getting proposed to! Trying not to be obvious as he fumbled in his pocket for the robin's egg-blue ring box, he added, "Isn't the deal that you're supposed to be given eternal happiness if you kiss your lover at sunset under the bridge?"

Looking up at it, Adam nodded. "That's why Cale proposed there to Lane last night."

"Lane said you were right to tell him that Lane knew what he was planning," Kris admitted. "She said it was much more romantic to be all alone with Cale in a quiet place for the proposal. Just the two of them."

"Right for them," Adam agreed. "But I was thinking..." He took off his hat, then Kris', setting them both down on the bridge. He cupped Kris' face in his hands, bending down for a long, sweet kiss. Reluctantly pulling back, he started again, taking a gulp. "I was thinking that being _on_ a bridge is better."

"Well, it's less rocky and less likely to make you seasick," Kris agreed. 

Laughing at Kris' prosaic nature, Adam brushed his thumb over Kris' lower lip. "True. So practical you are, Kris Allen."

"Well, it's symbolic too. I'd rather have a solid relationship without any waves." Kris paused. "Except the waves of heat that wash over me when we're having sex."

"Or when we're arguing."

"And then having make-up sex."

"It always comes back to sex, doesn't it?" Adam teased.

"My partner is the hottest guy on the planet. Hell yeah, it always comes back to sex!" Kris teased back. Standing on his tiptoe and leaning against Adam's chest, he pressed his lips against Adam's in a slow, warm kiss that he hoped conveyed the love he felt. "And need and desire and love."

"All of it. We have everything," Adam said. He took one hand away from Kris' face to reach into his pocket and pull out a small black pouch. "Except this--"

"And this..." Kris held out the box. 

They looked at the bag and the box and then at each other. Laughing, they said in unison, "Will you marry me?"

Falling into each other's arms, their lips kissing a pledge to each other, the moon slid over the sky, gilding the bridges silver and the buildings gold. 

Laughing softly and brushing his lips against Adam's smiling mouth, Kris whispered, "I'm so happy. So happy. I just wish I could marry you right now and put this ring on your finger right this minute. I wish--" 

"Finally!" Emmaline's voice carried across the water. "The happy ending!"

Adam and Kris looked up and began to laugh as they saw their family standing at one end of the bridge, Emmaline jumping up and down in excitement on a step, her glittery mask shining up at them. 

"Oh no..." Dani whispered, her voice carrying as well. "I'm sorry! We were just wandering around, looking for you and... we should leave."

"It's fine," Kris began. "Actually, it's _wonderful._ Y'all have been here through...everything. I mean, Lane was in the coffee shop and..."

"Geoffrey was behind the curtain," Adam teased, motioning everyone up onto the bridge.

"Ha!" Lane snorted. "I was the one urging you two to get together in person. Me and my scissors and scrapbook pictures." 

"Well, I'm not interested in cutting anything," Kris told her and held up his little box. "I'd rather glue us together, like those scrapbooks. Bind us together. I was just wishing we could get married right now."

"That would be amazing," Adam agreed.

"A wish! Where is that fairy godmother lady?" Emmaline asked, standing on tiptoe to look around. "She could help us."

"Fairy godmother lady?" Adam and Kris said in unison.

"This storyteller in St. Mark's," Dani explained. "Emmaline is convinced she's a fairy godmother. I don't know where she came from..." She winked at the two men. They looked at each other in surprise, then at Dani and Emmaline.

"She gaves me two double loons like the kind you big boys use in your caching game!" Emmaline told them. "Except mine has glitter on the edges."

"Glitter on the edges?" Kris and Adam said in unison once again, remembering their first time geocaching.

"Remember when you were my glitter application assistant?" Adam asked softly.

"Still am." Kris smiled up at Adam. "This fairy godmother... what's up with that?"

"Let's just say it's a little bit of magic," Adam asserted.

"Well, in that case, I wish she was here to make my wish come true. Although, we can say our vows and put the rings on our fingers and just make it legal later, right?" Kris pressed.

"Well, actuallllly...." Geoffrey began, then stopped to look at Teresa with a sheepish glance. "I...may have gotten myself ordained online to perform weddings..."

"Tell me you did not, you interfering..." Teresa stopped as Adam and Kris both burst out laughing. 

"Actuallllllly..." Adam drawled with a smile for Teresa and a pat on Geoffrey's back. "It's perfect."

"It is. Marry me, right now," Kris urged, sliding his arm around Adam's waist and raising himself up for a kiss.

"Not yet!" Neil interjected, sliding his arm between them."That has to wait until after you're man and... man."

"They're _already_ men," Emmaline told Neil. "Do you mean husband and husband?"

When Neil bit his lip, Eber laughed softly. "I do love seeing a three year old out pedantic you, Neil." 

Taking pity on Neil, Cale commented while pointing at Kris and Adam, "But he's right. No kissing until after you're married."

"Well, then, Geoffrey, get started!" Kris urged. "Because I intend to spend the rest of the night kissing my husband." 

"Sounds like another perfect plan," Adam agreed, cupping Kris' cheek in his hand. 

Leila smiled as Adam and Lane organized everyone into place, the group forming a circle around the two men. Geoffrey cleared his throat and then wiped his eyes. 

"Is Uncle Brushbrush crying?" Emmaline whispered, because it seemed like whispering was the right thing to do right now, the hush that fell over them like a soft light blanket. She pulled off her mask to see clearly. 

"Yes, I am," Geoffrey admitted. "Join their hands..." he urged and watched while Kim put her hand on Kris' and urged it forward, while Leila did the same with her son, both women sniffling themselves when the two men clasped hands. "Wonderful. Dearly beloved... I'm told the best way to begin is this. Once upon a time... as has happened for centuries before and will happen for centuries hereafter, two people met and fell in love."

"Dadam and Dadakiss!" Emmaline prompted. 

"Yes." Geoffrey smiled. "Adam and Kris met and fell in love over coffee and geocaching and art museums and dancing and singing and swimming and so many little moments that form a firm foundation. And their love made a joyful noise indeed. They created a life together and brought a circle of friends and family to surround them. It only seems fitting that tonight they exchange circles that symbolize the timeless connection between them." He nodded and squeezed their hands before stepping back, smiling gratefully when Teresa handed him a tissue. 

Seeing the tears welling in Kris' eyes, Adam lifted his hand and gently brushed his thumb against Kris' wet eyelashes. He cupped his cheek, then began. "I brought you here, to this impossible city of delicate beauty, the islands brought together by endless bridges, to stand on a bridge as we move from one part of life to another, both of them wonderful, but different. Ready to bridge the distance between what we know and what we hope for the future. A new life over every one of life's bridges..." He paused and squeezed Kris' hand.

" _La Vita Nuova_..." Kris realized. "The new life." 

"Yes. But each bridge is stronger than the last, because it's built on the strength of what we've learned and lived before, the foundations stronger. The past is beautiful, but the future..." Adam paused as tears clogged his throat. 

"The new life." Kris nodded and turned his head to kiss Adam's palm. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, the salty tang of the seawater mixing with the scent of Adam's cologne and something more, something new, perhaps his own sense of trust or faith. Lowering his voice, he began to sing, "Make new love, but keep the old, one is silver and the other's gold." 

Laughing, Adam opened the pouch. "Truer words, truer words..." Pulling out the ring, he held it up for Kris to see. 

"Adam... is this... a sword?" Kris tentatively touched the band that was fashioned into a miniature sword, the 'blade' platinum and the hilt gold with a single diamond in the hilt. "It's amazing." 

"Yes. I found that little green sword in your drawer and..." Adam took Kris' hand. "I think it was seeing that sword and realizing you'd kept it all these years... It started my heart, it healed it. I think that sword really made me realize that we were real. That little sword... made all the difference to me and I knew that the little sword must have meant a lot to you..." Adam paused, searching for words that now evaded him for the happiness in his heart was greater than mere words. 

"It did, it was a symbol of our beginning. A found treasure in a box, that someone had placed there, waiting for us to find, just like we found each other, the fates pushing us to be in the right place and the right time, with open hearts, just waiting to find each other. The treasure... of what we are together." Kris paused to wipe his own eyes, then smiled when he heard sniffling behind him and turned to see his mother, Leila and Dani crying, their tears making silver tracks down their faces in the moonlight. 

"And I was thinking about that sword... It's about fighting for what we want, what we need and for protecting each other. We each have our dragons within, don't we?"

Kris stared at Adam and then nodded. "That's a great visual. The imagery--"

"Think about a song later, okay?" Adam urged with a smile. In a soft voice, he admitted, "These dragons -- my insecurities and trust issues..."

"And my fear of being thrown away or being found inadequate and my fear of not having enough..." Kris nodded and touched his chest. "Those fears are like fire breathing within, aren't they?"

"Yes. So...." Adam touched the ring. "I was thinking your ring could be a promise to each other that we will help slay each other's dragons."

Kris gulped and blinked, then surrendered to the tears, allowing them to spill over his lashes. He sighed when Adam enfolded him in his arms, then smiled when he felt Adam's lips on his neck and Adam's tears in his hair. They were both mushy and not like his chair. He pulled back slightly, brushing his lips against Adam's jaw, then leaned back, to look up into Adam's eyes, darker in the silver light of night, but glittering all the same. 

"Kris, I love you so much. I always have. Always."

"I love you too and I don't want to cry because you know, But...this couldn't be better. I made a wish that day when I went to the house and blew glitter on it. Emmaline's idea. I made this wish..." Kris caught his breath and closed his eyes. "This wish that we could have a do over in a coffee shop. That we could mix old love and new love like the song... Make new love and keep the old, one is silver and the other gold...And you gave me a ring that was silver and gold." 

"And now it's time to put it on you." Adam waited and when Kris nodded, he took Kris' left hand and slowly slid the ring down his finger. With this ring, I thee wed, binding our old love with our new love in a new life." 

Staring down at his new ring, the silver and gold glinting up at him in the moonlight, Kris sighed happily. "My turn now." He flipped open the box and took out the ring. "The pave diamonds are glitter." Kris smiled. "I was thinking that someday we might not want to play with glitter, we'll be too old--"

"Hush your mouth!" Adam teased. 

"Or we'll just move on to something new. But I'll always have a place in my memory book for the glitter. From the first moment I saw you in person..." Kris smiled and began to sing, "Why do stars fall down from the sky..." 

Adam blinked as a soft silver flash cast light on them. 

"There she is again!" Emmaline called out, pointing. She didn't care what anyone else said, that lady was a fairy godmother. Couldn't they all see the glitter -- just what you needed for a magical wedding!

Everyone looked up to see a flash of silver lace trailed by glitter around a corner. Adam and Kris glanced back, counting heads. "Everyone's here..." Kris whispered, then fell to silence as a whisper of words came floating back to them. 

_"E vissero felici e contenti...”_

"That means you'll live happily ever after!" Emmaline danced excitedly. " _If_ you hurry up and finish the wedding!" 

"Good point. Let's start that happily ever after," Adam agreed with a smile at his daughter. He held his hand up to Kris and waited while Kris placed the ring at his fingertip.

"And so I'll look at this ring..." Kris choked up.

"This beautiful ring with its black diamonds and silver-white pave diamonds that look like glitter, right?" Adam prompted. 

"Yes, with this ring I thee wed..." Kris leaned forward and kissed Adam, lingering for long moments on the soft lips and warm mouth. He slid the band down Adam's finger, staring at the sparkle of the diamonds in moonlight, then looked up into eyes that reflected love back at him in an endless mirror. "With this ring with its diamonds that look like glitter, I thee wed. So you can look at it and you'd always know, always remember that the sparkliest moments in my life have all been and will always be with you."

 

_E vissero felici e contenti...  
And they lived happily ever after..._


	61. Epilogue

**Epilogue: You're the Cream in My Coffee  
Rating: R**

 

"Wow, Laney. Who's that hot guy in the tight jeans?" Adam said in a stage whisper as he nodded toward the man in front of him in line.

"Wow, Adam. How am I supposed to know?" Lane rolled her eyes. "I thought the days of me keeping an Excel spreadsheet of do-able twinks, cross-coded by geographic location and age--"

"And flexibility?" Adam asked eagerly.

"Yes, that," Lane agreed with a prim twist to her mouth. "I thought those days were over. _Years_ ago."

"Well, a man can look." Adam winked and then whistled, while ignoring Lane's attempts to choke her own laughter. "And this guy looks do-able. Many times over."

 

"Explain to me how we ended up with four children?" Neil asked with a loud sigh as he returned from the morning school run. He flung the keys to their SUV on the kitchen counter and sat down, grateful he had a few minutes of relative quiet before he had to start work. 

"Wellll..." Dani began with a grin, sliding a cup of coffee across the kitchen island towards her husband. "When a man and woman love each other very much..."

"Or a woman buys a turkey baster and a man jerks off into a cup..." Neil added with a smirk. 

"Have I mentioned lately how glad I am that you all talked me into moving in here?" Leila interjected as she walked into the kitchen and made straight for the coffeemaker. "The conversation is so edifying."

" _I'm_ glad! We were close to being outnumbered!" Dani shuddered. 

"No shit. We're soooo relieved you moved in with us. Of course, it also allows us to keep an eye on you as you get..." Neil paused, then added, " _Older_."

"Oh fantastic, thanks for the reminder. This is why _Adam_ is my favorite." Leila laughed when Neil stuck his tongue out at her, then shook her head. "Life in this house never ceases to amaze. If it's not walking into conversations about men jerking off into cups..." Leila put down the cup in her hand with a grimace.

"Don't worry, Mom. Adam and Kris used plastic cups. These are ceramic." Neil laughed as he handed his mother a mug. 

"Thanks so much for the added visualization!" Leila snarked, slapping Neil's arm. 

Neil smirked and squared his shoulders to stand up straight. Thumping his own chest, he noted, "Hey, at least I didn't need a tool to impregnate my wife."

Dani and Leila looked at each other and rolled their eyes in unison.

"Stop that," Neil complained. "It freaks me out when you two act like each other."

"Oooh po wittle baby..." Dani crooned. 

"No, seriously. Last Halloween, when you dressed up as each other?" Neil shuddered.

Dani winked. "Best birth control ever."

Neil rolled his own eyes, then laughed when Leila grabbed a spoon from the counter and waved it at him. "Speaking of Adam and Kris, where are they? I thought Adam would be glued to the computer waiting for the proof of the People cover."

"Oh, it's not going to come in until late today. Adam saw the initial proof and didn't like Rory or Emmaline's hair, so they're re-doing it. Adam and Lane went on a coffee run about half an hour ago." Dani smiled and shook her head. "So you can guess where Kris is." 

 

Adam watched with a leer as the man in front of him dug in his pocket for money and nervously asked, "Ummm... wait a minute, please?" 

Ostentatiously tapping her fingertips on the counter, the barista snapped, "I don't have all day. There are customers behind you."

"Don't worry. I'll cover his coffee!" Adam said brightly, shoving a bill toward her. 

"Oh, I can't let you pay for my coffee!"

"Of course you can. Don't argue."

"I don't want to be beholden to anyone."

"Not even _me_?" Adam asked, smiling his winningest smile. He knew it was his winningest smile because his mom had told him it was when he'd practiced it before, Lane was chuckling, and yeah, the guy in front of him melted. 

"I don't want you to hold my temporary poverty against me."

"How about you hold yourself against me and we'll call it even?" Adam wiggled his eyebrows, then laughed as everyone around burst out laughing. 

"How many years have they been playing this game?" The barista asked her coworker, the coworker who was going to get the big tip for playing along.

The second barista shrugged. "I dunno. But they get a kick out of it. And it's kinda cute that guys their age still..." 

"Guys our _age_?" Two voices hissed.

"Thanks." Lane held up a twenty and shoved it into the barista tip jar. "Made my day."

"Traitor!" Kris gasped in mock outrage, then shrugged. "Then again, don't know why I'm agitated. They have to be talking about you..." He poked Adam in the chest. "And your age. You'll always be older than me." He grinned.

Adam grinned back. "And taller."

"And have more hair....." A young male voice interjected. "And if height correlates with dick size... Well, let's put it this way. He still looks damn fiiine to me. I wouldn't mind calling him Daddy."

"Back off," Kris snapped as he stepped between Adam and the...young punk. "He's taken." He grabbed Adam's left hand and held it up, pointing to the wide and still sparkling band on the ring finger and thinking maybe he needed to upgrade next anniversary to something even bigger and sparklier. Could you put a scrolling LED line on a ring? "Permanently." 

"Hey, dude." The young man held up his hands. "Sounds like you weren't appreciating him."

"I appreciate him plenty!" Kris growled, then turned around, flung his arms around Adam's neck and planted a hard and possessive kiss on his lips. 

"I'd appreciate my coffee." Lane raised her eyebrows and shoved the two men aside. 

Reluctantly pulling back from Adam's warmth, Kris smiled up at him, then glared from Adam to Lane and back again. "Waitaminit. Laney had a spreadsheet of do-able twinks?"

"Don't be ridiculous." Adam laughed.

"Yes, Kris. Really." Lane sipped her coffee to hide her smile. "As if Adam would need a spreadsheet to keep track of do-able twinks back in the day. He had that intel _memorized_... far better than he did with song lyrics. Priorities, don't you know?"

"Oh, I know..." Kris growled, glaring at the young guy who was grinning smugly at him, then at his husband. "I know all about Adam and his cavalcade of cock--"

"Cavalcade?" Adam sighed and hid his grin. "You cannot be serious."

"Well, I am." Lane smiled smugly. "Remember that time in Moscow when you forgot the words to Whataya Want From Me? On a live feed to their national television station?" 

"Hardeefreakingharharrrrr..." Adam shook his head. 

"Humfph!" Kris grunted, reaching for his own coffee and pointedly ignoring Adam's cup waiting on the counter as Adam exaggeratedly watched the young guy who'd hit on him -- on Adam, his husband, damn it! -- walk past them. He narrowed his eyes.

Lane and Adam shared a smile of amusement at Kris' possessiveness as he growled at the kid at the counter. Lane nodded to herself. After what she called the NEWYEARSDAYINCIDENT -- which in her mind was all capital letters -- Kris had proven territorial about Adam. Which made perfect sense, of course, because when you came close to losing something precious, you learned to hold on to it tightly. And Adam seemed to like it, so it worked out. Plus Kris was terribly cute when he got all--

"Hedgehog..." Adam began. 

"Eh, it's okay." Kris shrugged nonchalantly. "After all, at _your_ age it's not like you could keep up with a twink any more anyway. Could ya?" 

"You..." Adam glared and circled Kris' wrist with strong fingers and pulled him toward the door. "We're going to the apartment and--" 

"NO!" Lane planted herself in front of Kris and Adam and held her hand up. "No. You both have work to do today."

"But Laaaaane..." They both whined, squeezing each other's hand.

"Oh stop. Refocus, please." Lane pointed towards the street where their cars were parked. "We need to get back to the office soon. And by the way? Pouting only works when you're two, not forty--"

"It always works for me." Kris elbowed Adam and waited until he looked down to work on a pout. He smiled triumphantly at Lane when Adam's eyes went immediately to his lower lip and stared at it.

"That's because you're a slut for him and so he gives you everything," Lane said quickly. 

"Hey, that's not fair," Kris complained. He paused, then added, "I don't get everything." When everyone finished laughing, he continued, "Plus we're more complicated than that. Aren't we?"

"No kidding. You make us sound so... simplistic," Adam protested. Although really, now he had an image in his mind of his cock sliding over Kris' lower lip, so it was hard to concentrate.

Lane raised her eyebrow and grinned as she looked over Kris' shoulder and sat down at the nearest table. "Men are simplistic. There is little intellectual or emotional difference between Cale and our two sons."

"That's because Cale is heterosexual," Kris explained, watching the reflection in the plate glass. "He's less evolved."

"Oh yeah, you little monkey?" Cale's voice rumbled in an undertone as he punched Kris in the arm with one hand and took a cup of coffee from Lane with the other.

"Hey, Cale." Adam nodded as Cale joined them after running his two sons to school. The men all sat down with Lane. "Don't take offense. I mean, Kris wears just as much ugly plaid as you do. Sometimes I wonder if I should have his gay card revoked."

"Then I get out the naughty stool and you forget allll about it," Kris quipped. 

"You get out the naughty stool and I forget my name. Luckily, I have you screaming it multiple times, so it all comes back to me." Glancing at the clock on the coffeehouse wall, Adam asked Lane, "We've had enough fun for one day, right? We can drop Kris off at the school for his morning class and we can go to the office for our morning staff meeting."

"Does Adam hafta?" Kris whined as Adam's hand on his thigh moved up higher."But I wanted--"

"Yes, yes. I know. You wanted Adam to pound you into a mattress," Lane said absently as she pulled out her phone. "But you always want that and today Adam no doubt wants to keep in touch with the photo editor at People --"

"Aurora and Emmaline's hair was not perfect in the shots they chose," Adam confided to Kris. "And you know how picky they are about it."

Kris bit his lip. Rory had her father's hair and always looked perfect in his opinion and Emmaline... well, her hair was like some blonde force of nature, but what did he know? Well, he knew that Rory and Emmaline weren't the picky one.

Lane hid her own smile and continued, "Plus he has auditions for a new drummer. Busy day."

Kris elbowed Cale. "Does she talk to you like that -- like a two year old she needs to distract from the shiny toy?"

"Is Adam your shiny toy?" Cale teased.

"Yeah, when he puts on that edible glitter." Kris winked. "Or that silver studded cock ring and--" 

"Busy day!" Lane interrupted with a glare at her husband and Kris. 

"True." Adam nodded, then held up his index finger. "But.. priorities. Did you just say Kris always wanst me to pound him into a mattress?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. "I'm _shocked_."

"No, you're not," Lane corrected. "You're hopeful he'll get a chance to prove that he wants you to pound him into the mattress. Or the world's ugliest chair. Which, can I reiterate that the day you moved that chair out of your house so I don't have to see it again was the happiest day of my life?" Lane put her hand over her heart and sniffed loudly.

Cale snorted. "Wait. I thought our wedding or the birth days of our sons were the happiest days of your life? Wait again." He held up his hand. "I see your point. Removing that monstrosity of a chair does outrank those days."

"This is why I love you so," Lane exclaimed, leaning forward to give Cale a kiss. "You understand priorities. Speaking of which..." She pointed at Kris and Adam who were eyeing each other like Kris was mint chocolate chip ice cream and Adam was dump cake. "You two? _Later_. In your Secret Lair or Bat Cave or Den of Iniquity or whatever you call that place."

"I'd call it Kris' old apartment that they bought and renovated for private space," Cale noted with a shrug.

"So unimaginative," Lane retorted with a grin.

"I think she capitalized the words den of iniquity," Adam told Kris.

"You know it. And secret lair." Kris wiggled his eyebrows.

"But Bat Cave is already a proper compound noun or name, so it's already capitalized."

"Excellent point." Kris agreed, biting his lip to keep from laughing as Lane crossed her eyes. "Speaking of excellent points..." Kris leered down at Adam's lap. 

Lane sighed. "We've had our fun. We all need to get down to business."

Adam nodded. "Oh, I can get--"

"I know. Down." Cale rolled his eyes. "Old joke, dude. Old." 

"I'm not liking the theme this morning," Adam complained. "Might as well go to BALLS and get down to business if you all are just going to mock me for being the oldest." 

Kris shrugged. "Sure. My business is all about, like I was saying, excellent points... That Secret Lair..."

"Den of Iniquity," Adam corrected. 

"Yeah, that. It was the investment was the best one we ever made, buying that building," Kris whispered, nudging Adam with his elbow and wiggling his eyebrows.

Adam grinned. "That king-size Tempurpedic mattress was the best investment we ever made." 

Lane laughed. "Do you have anything in that apartment other than that mattress? And the world's ugliest chair?"

"Sure." Kris reached out and took Adam's free hand in his. "We have a fridge, a naughty stool, my mushie chair and a toy cabinet. What more could we need?"

"I know--" Lane began. "I saw Adam's wish list on my Amazon account and--"

Adam laughed. "And since you want to know everything, Laney, the toy cabinet has--"

"Stop." Lane shook her head. "No, actually, _go on_. Do tell me about all of your sex toys in the cabinet. Maybe Cale and I could spice up our sex life. I'd like to see him in a harness and--"

"My ears, my ears, my virgin ears!" Kris shrieked as Cale turned bright red and began to choke on his coffee. "Stopstopstop!"

"Oh, I'll tell you." Adam leaned forward. "The best sex toy is the biggest one. It's really big. Because Kris loves big when it comes to sex. The bigger the better."

"So I hear. I've been next to you in hotels a time or two," Lane noted drily.

"Didn't Neil say that once?" Adam asked absently while staring at Kris' mouth. 

Cale groaned. "Me too. Seriously, dude, sometimes you need to keep it down."

"I thought guys always wanted it up!" Kris quipped, giggling at his own joke.

"Not exactly a _hard_ ship. All he has to do is put a drop of glitter on his face and you get an erection, Kris," Lane reminded him. "Keep it in your pants until you get to the apartment for the nooner Adam's planned."

"How did you know..." Kris splutters, although why he should, he doesn't know. Laney still knows everything even if she wasn't Adam's PA any more. 

"Simple deduction, my dear Watson. You're wearing tight jeans and no plaid. I know the rules of the apartment -- they start with no plaid and end with your butt in the tightest jeans Adam can convince you to buy." 

Kris sighed. "I really don't know what I was thinking."

"I do. You were thinking, 'Sex.' What do I have to do to get it?" Cale shrugged. "It's simple. Guys will do whatever it takes to get sex."

"See? Simplistic." Lane nodded. "I quite like it when I am proven correct." 

"You gave up the plaid to get the world's ugliest chair." Adam reminded Kris. "A very basic deal. _Quid pro quo_."

"Hmm." Kris narrowed his eyes. "I thought Neil was the contract negotiator for BALLS, not you."

Lane winced. "I can't believe I allowed you to talk me into agreeing re-naming Geoffrey's company BALLS when we reconsolidated it. Hell, I can't believe you talked Geoffrey into it."

Kris shrugged. "I can't believe you took drugs during childbirth. How were we supposed to know you were still high on them when you signed that paper?" He smiled innocently, then winced when Lane kicked his shin. Evil woman. 

"One day, one day, I'll get you back for that. You know that, right?" Lane smirked as she saw the alarmed glance the two men gave each other and cackled, "That's right, my pretties. Be afraid, very afraid. I'll get you and your little dog too!"

Kris took a long sip of his coffee, then exclaimed, "Oh, I get it. Those two boys of yours are really your flying monkeys!"

Cale laughed. Their two boys were a handful. Lane made managing them look easy. And then she'd go off on a business trip and he'd be reminded that she was some sort of super woman. He leaned over to kiss her cheek, smiling when she touched his hand.

"Flying monkeys." Adam nodded as he watched the silent byplay of affection between Lane and Cale. Ha. They really should thank him more often for ensuring they met each other on that long ago reconnaisance mission. "Well, that explains so much."

"Like starting with those really weird little suits she makes them wear?" Kris leaned forward to poke Cale, who shook his head in shared bewilderment. 

"Yeah. I thought it was some veddy British affectation..." Adam drawled in his best imitation of a British accent, the one that always made Lane groan, then giggle, even after nearly two decades of hearing it. "I also can't believe you talked Cale into letting Jake and Dane out in those suits."

"Those suits are adorable!" Lane protested. She sniffed, "And quite proper."

"Quite proper." Adam wiggled his pinky finger as he sipped his coffee.

Cale laughed. " _Quite._ Something." 

"And by the way, Laney, we don't have a little dog," Adam pointed out with a smirk as he heard Lane's teeth grind together. 

Kris pointed at Adam. "Hey. The kids want a dog for Chrismakah, by the way."

"I know. I keep seeing the helpful hints in the form of letters to Santa oh so casually left around the house."

"And the sad sad story Emmaline told us the other night about what happens to kids who grow up without dogs." 

"I think Neil might have actually been behind that masterpiece." 

Lane shook her head. "Actually, it was your mother, Adam. She's already got a dog picked out." 

"Uh-oh..." Kris whined, but then smiled. He liked dogs. And maybe Emmaline would get so entranced with a dog she'd forget about her extreme skateboarding stuff. He could wish.

"Maybe it will be okay," Adam conceded. "After all, I do enjoy picking out collars for my little pet..." He smiled and rubbed Kris' hair, grinning widely when Kris pushed his hand away and Lane laughed. "Hedgehog." 

"Listen, old man!" Kris began.

"Old man! I'll show you old. Or I'll show you how experience and wisdom trump youth every time. Boy." 

"Here we go again..." Lane smiled at Cale, then stared down at her phone as her traffic app beeped and informed her that the tunnel was open once again. "Okay, let's go, boys. The tunnel is open." 

 

"Can we do that again?" Kris asked, his voice raspy from his loud cries and the hard beat of his heart in his veins. "I want your cock in me all afternoon." He caught his breath as Adam slowly pulled out of him, then straightened him from his position bending over the chair. "Because, day-umm... For an old man..." He looked over his shoulder and leered as Adam stretched to retrieve a damp cloth from a nearby small table. Damn, he had such a nice long body and speaking of long...

Pulling Kris around to face him, Adam wiped Kris' body with the cloth he tossed in the direction of the sink. "I think you make those comments about us getting older just to aggravate me enough that I fuck you into the floor to prove I've still got what it takes." He smiled when Kris nuzzled into his shoulder.

Kris hid his grin in the curve of Adam's neck and shoulder. "That's ridiculous. You don't need to prove anything." He slid his hands down Adam's back and squeezed his ass. 

"I can feel your smile against my skin, you know." 

"I"m smiling because I'm groping your ass." 

"Liar, liar, pants on fire."

"I'm not wearing any pants. But I do feel like I'm on fire. Down there."

"Oh hell no."

"Oh hell no?"

"You feel like you're on fire down there? Kris Allen, do you a...." Adam gulped loudly. "A social disease?" 

"A social disease?" Kris wrinkled his nose and opened his eyes wide.

Adam pressed his lips together to hide his smile as Kris realized he'd widened his eyes too far and blinked so that he could fix it. Those acting classes he and Kris had taken together a few years ago were worth their weight in comedy gold, in Adam's opinion. Kris had taken the idea of facial expressiveness to whole new and hilarious levels. "Sexually transmitted disease."

"Well, yeah." Kris heaved out a long sigh and made an effort to look concerned and contrite, trying to remember what that acting coach had told him. "But... but... I got it from you!"

"From me? Ha! I've been faithful to you all these years."

"And I've been faithful to you too. Honestly, when would I have the time to look elsewhere? Between four kids, the bar, your career, BALLS and teaching in school? I'm overbooked!"

"Oooh, poor baby. Do you need a vacation?" Adam cooed. wiggling his fingers against Kris' side just to hear him giggle.

"Stop that!" Kris shoved Adam's hand aside, giggling when Adam used that hand to tickle him. "I got the fire inside from you because it is sexually transmitted. This disease. The disease of addiction. I'm hopelessly addicted to having sex with you."

Adam's lip quirked. "That was... sweet."

"Too sweet?" 

"Possibly. I think I need something spicy to achieve equilibrium."

"Well, I'm not sure I want you to achieve equilibrium." Kris pushed at Adam's shoulders until they tumbled onto the bed, then shoved Adam until he rolled onto his back. Crawling immediately on top of Adam, Kris stretched out, body to body and then counting, one, two, three in his head because the acting classes had been kickass for helping him with timing, he wiggled. 

Adam groaned and cupped Kris' ass. "Go ahead, wiggle again. And explain why you don't want me to have equilibrium."

"Because..." Kris dipped his head and brushed his lips against Adam's, smiling when Adam's lips parted immediately. "I'd rather make your head spin." 

 

Twisting his mouth, Neil asked, "Did you see the mock-up of the cover People magazine sent over?" He shoved one last dinner plate into the dishwasher and then winked at Danielle before adding in Kris' direction, "I cannot believe they went with Kris' dorky idea--"

"You shouldn't call someone's idea dorky! Insults stifle creativity!" Emmaline interjected. Sometimes she got really tired of the way DadKris and Uncle Neil teased each other. "Family rules!"

"And you shouldn't interrupt someone's sentence!" Neil responded, picking up the paper from the counter. "Family ruuuules!"

"Neil, how old are you?" Kris asked, plucking the print out from Neil's hand. "Honestly. Don't make me get out the potatoes." 

"Sweet or baking?" Dani asked, reaching into a basket on the counter and holding up one of each. Neil stepped back. 

"Ha!" Emmaline grinned triumphantly, then deflated when her mother looked at her with that MomLook that meant trouble was imminent. Lording it over Uncle Neil wasn't worth the trouble. "Yes, Mom." Emmaline sighed. Loudly. She looked up under her lashes to see that no one was paying her attention because they were all looking at the print out of the proposed cover of People Magazine. Oh well, time to move on to more important matters. "Hey, how did my picture come out?"

"Perfect." Kris bent forward and kissed his oldest daughter's dark blonde head. "As always." 

"I think you love Emmaline best," their youngest daughter, Ruthie, pouted. She added, "She always gets the mostest kisses."

"No, she doesn't!" Serena the second youngest argued as Kris swung six year old Ruthie in a small circle before giving her a kiss. "You do, 'cause you're the baby!"

"I may be the baby, but you're the shortest, Serrie!" Ruthie pointed out from her perch in Kris' arms. "You're eight, almost nine and I'm taller than you." 

"DNA will out..." Neil muttered under his breath with a smirk in Kris' direction. 

"Speaking of things coming out...Hey, how did our pictures come out?" Adam asked as he returned to the room after taking a phone call in the hallway. He reached for the papers and looked at the photos of their four daughters, smiling at the funny faces they were making in their individual box of the Brady Bunch-style grid, his mother in the center. 

"How did I get the Alice the housekeeper position?" Leila complained. "Well, at least I'm not wearing a uniform."

"Yeah, wasn't it weird how she was supposedly a member of the family and yet they made her wear that uniform? Total classism," Neil complained.

"And those hideous white shoes!" Dani shuddered.

"Forget about her shoes. What about those ratty sneakers Kris wears?" Adam shuddered in unison with Dani. "But focus. Specifically, on our _hair_?"

Emmaline giggled. "I can always count on Dadam to focus with me on the important details." 

"Speaking of hair -- where's Rory? And speaking of important details..." Adam looked at Danielle with a question in his eyes. "Did you read the rough draft of the article? I didn't get a chance. How did they handle the sperm donor business?"

Danielle nodded and told him softly, "Rory's changing to go back out for her dance lesson. Don't worry about the article. They didn't focus on which of you is each girl's sperm donor." 

Emmaline groaned loudly. "Mooommmm... Dadammmmm... Using the word sperm in the kitchen? You two are so obscene! Honestly!"

Leila gave Emmaline a hug. "I understand, sweetheart. I had to endure a similar conversation with your mother and Neil this morning. I don't know what I did wrong raising those two boys. I really don't."

"I think they turned out... okay," Rory disagreed as she came back into the kitchen, carrying her dance bag. "Yes. Totally okay."

"What do you want?" Neil asked suspiciously as he looked at the bright blue eyes and strawberry blonde hair of the girl Adam had somehow conned Dani into naming Aurora. 

"Ha. If I wanted something, I would have gone way more overboard than saying you turned out _okay._ Unless, of course, I was trying to deliberately downplay it so you wouldn't realize I was trying to sweeten you up." Rory looked innocently at Neil.

Neil narrowed his eyes. He knew that face. He'd seen his brother try it out on their parents and get away with murder, murder! too many damn times. But then again, sometimes he had been innocent. So how to know? "Are you serious or scamming me?"

"Well, those acting lessons weren't a waste for her," Leila noted with a wry grin in Kris' direction.

"I'm going to be on Broadway some day!" Rory announced. She grabbed an apple from the basket on the counter and held it up. "I'll thank you all in my Tony Award acceptance speech."

"Me too!" Ruthie said instantly, mimicking her older and much worshipped sister's stance. Leila smiled as she saw a flash from the past and remembered Neil trying to imitate Adam in their children. 

Serena pouted. "I don't know what I want to be."

"That's okay, sweetie." Kris smiled as he hugged her tightly and gave her a kiss. "Maybe you can be like me and do a bunch of things. You don't have to settle for just one career or interest if you don't want to. Life has many twists and turns and sometimes, honestly, it's just a mystery about how it all turns out. Don't try to plan it so hard." 

"Yeah, Serrie." Emmaline shrugged. "I haven't decided yet either." She sidled closer to Adam and hissed, "Although maybe I'll become a parenting expert and give speeches about not talking about sperm in the kitchen! I"m scarred for life. Scarred, I tell you!"

"Get some Vitamin E lotion for those scars." Adam shrugged. "And I don't know how any of us ended up with a prudish daughter like Emmaline." 

"Humph! Well, someone in this house has to have some standards!" Emmaline teased.

"Standards? Did you say standards?" Kris and Leila asked, while Neil groaned and the girls all clapped. How Geoffrey and Lane had ever conned Adam into doing that charity performance of standards whose resulting EP had sold way too many copies, he didn't know, but he was tired of watching his brother dance with his wife and -- Yup. There they went. 

Adam grabbed Dani by the waist and began waltzing her around the kitchen, while singing, "When smoke gets in your eyes..." When Neil tapped him on the shoulder to cut in, Adam switched to "You're the Cream in My Coffee" and pulled Kris into his arms and danced him out onto the patio.

Leila smiled and reached for the sheaf of papers. "I'd like to read the article. Those two are going to be out there a while."

"Can I go swimming?" Ruthie asked.

"Uh...give Dadam and DaKris a while," Dani suggested, pulling back from her husband to talk. "You know how DaKris likes the pool."

Ruthie shrugged. "He likes kissing Dadam in the little hideyholes." 

"Yes." Leila cleared her throat. "Let's read this story. Emmaline, you want to do the honors?"

"You bet!" Emmaline took the papers eagerly, wincing when she heard a splash. Ugh. It was sooo embarrassing having parents who still wanted to kiss each other. And _stuff_. Ugh. Parents kissing. So gross. Thank god for those little grottoes. "Okay, so this is the story the reporter wrote. I better have gotten my credit!"

"You better have or People will be hearing from me!" Neil nodded.

"Calm down, Clarence Darrow." Dani patted her husband's arm. "Emmaline, please read the story to us." 

"Here goes..." Emmaline winked at her mother and started, "Once upon a time..."

 

 _  
Fifteen years ago, Adam Lambert, his partner Kris Allen and best friend Danielle Stori graced the cover of_ People _magazine with their newborn daughter, Emmaline. They were featured in the cover story, "The New American Family." The article highlighted several families who exemplified the changing definition of family in this country. The Lambert-Allen-Stori unit certainly was not only the most famous of those featured, but also generated the most responses from readers and the general public. Let's look at how this family has changed over the last decade and a half._

_First, let's start with the easy part -- the numbers. Then the family consisted of three adults and one baby girl. A decade and a half later, there are now four children in total, ranging from the oldest at age 15 to the youngest at six -- all girls. There are also two additional adults, including a husband for Stori. To add to the total and intriguing complexity, Stori's husband is Adam's younger brother, Neil Lambert and the Lambert men's mother, Leila, lives with them. And that's just the immediate family living in the same house._

_During a brief initial interview with Adam Lambert (which is quite clear is an audition I must ace before being granted access to his children), he is quick to point out with an infectious laugh that, "We sound like a sitcom or reality show, don't we? All we need is a golden retriever and we'd have all the ticky boxes checked for a hit show. In fact, we were offered our own reality show on Bravo. We spent about five seconds thinking about it before turning that down." He shudders at the notion of exposing his children to the public eye, then laughs again. "I spent my childhood wishing I could get away from my brother and spread my wings without my mother watching and here I am, living with both of them? What was I thinking? It seems that life is just a big circle, sometimes."_

_The broad smile on his face tells me he's making a joke, but having my own siblings, I have to wonder aloud just how difficult it might be living with them as adults._

_"The key," Adam leans forward over the table in the coffee shop where we're meeting. "Is separate wings. He has his space and I have mine. My mother has her own space too."_

_Achieving that balance between closeness and space, intimacy and independence is something the family has worked on, Lambert confides. "Sometimes, often, maybe? We screw up and get into each other's grill. Too closely and definitely too opinionated. Well, Neil is anyway. I, of course, am the picture of diplomacy. But..." Adam stares into his coffee with a smile. "Sometimes you need people you can trust to shake you up or show you the way..." Straightening up, he adds, "And our girls are surrounded by love, which is the beginning of every happy, healthy family. Love and security is what every child needs. Hell, it's what everyone needs. Safety in love gives you wings to fly."_

_Security begins at home, I realize a few weeks later when I must pass through not only the gates to the neighborhood, but also the gates to the Lambert-Allen-Stori home. Walking up the pathway to the sprawling Mediterranean-style house the family calls home a few weeks later, I see an oversized green door surrounded by hot pink bougainvillea. Over the door is a lintel with what looks like the impression of a few coins and oddly enough, a small sword. The obviously custom design is one of many personal touches throughout what is clearly a family home which even with the occasional glimmer of glamor is not a designer showpiece._

_As Kris Allen opens that over-size green entrance door with a cautious smile, I have to chuckle as the sound of laughter and voices raised in song floats out the portal. "The sound of music?"_

_"Oh geez, we probably sound like the Von Trapps or something." Kris laughs and the smile lines around his eyes and mouth wrinkle as though he's a man who laughs often and well. "Although I don't think anyone yodels."_

_"And we're not singing freaking Edelweiss!" Adam Lambert's voice calls out from somewhere within the sprawling, Mediterranean style home._

_"I could do it, ya know. I have a guitar and I bet you have lederhosen somewhere in your closet!" Kris teases with a wink in my direction. "Or better yet -- next Halloween... Oh wait, speaking of monsters, here's my brother-in-law, Neil." He grins, the kind of evil, teasing grin brothers give each other as a tall, broad-shouldered man with a resemblance to his more famous sibling enters the foyer._

_Shaking my hand, Neil Lambert immediately makes it clear that he's not one for small talk or charming a reporter. "Hey. We want to make it clear that we are not going to discuss who is the sperm donor of each child. It's a matter of public record on the birth certificates, but--"_

_"I already spoke with her about that. You can't stop negotatiating contracts, can you?! Because the best hobby is arguing, isn't it?" Adam asks his brother with a smile as he joins us in the foyer, referring to Neil Lambert's professional work as a contract negotiator at BALLS._

_All four of them have an interest in BALLS, a company originally founded by Lambert's long-time manager and good friend, Geoffrey Brush. Both Lambert men, Allen, and Stori all have financial interest and varying degrees of hands-on involvement. The company is run on a day-to-day basis by Brush and Lane Newland (whose first name is one of the Ls in the company name). Newland was Lambert's one-time personal assistant, but several years ago made the leap to co-director of BALLS, referred to by all involved as the "family business."_

_Right now, however, the two Lambert brothers are more concerned with personal family business as they explain to me that they have deemphasized biological parenthood in favor of a focus on what they refer to as "real" parenting -- the day to day life of raising children -- and creating a happy family. Adam Lambert asserts control over the conversation from his brother with a warmth and charm that makes it obvious why he's every reporter's dream interview. And why a younger sibling might resent him, although Neil just looks relieved and it becomes apparent that their interplay works for both of them._

_As we walk down a hallway on an abbreviated tour of the house, Adam Lambert is as quick to pull what I belatedly realize is a nervous Kris Allen to his side as he is to point out that a happy family in their case includes two couples who prioritize their own relationships as well as that with their children. Midway through a long explanation of date nights and vacation plans in the family room, Danielle Stori walks in and greets me while casting a glance around the room, clearly making sure it's suitable for company... or rather her concern_ becomes _clear as her husband teases her about it. She shrugs and throws up her hands, "We have four kids and what seems like an entire acting troupe here on any given day. It's a wonder that there isn't a trombone laying on the floor or a vampire cape draped over the sofa!"_

 _The room looks neat enough to me, but I admit to her that I could be easily distracted by the fascinating mixed media collage over the fireplace mantel. Seeing a Venetian Carnevale mask as a focal point in the collage, I ask about the Lambert-Allen wedding in_ La Serenissima _, the pictures of which also graced the cover of People magazine at the time. Allen shifts on his feet and Adam Lambert runs a comforting hand down Allen's back and calmly explains that if I'm asking about the "debacle caused by fear and anger" many years before, they learned hard lessons and never repeated those mistakes. He seems to emphasize the point by leading the tour out of the room and onward._

_"Yeah," Neil Lambert adds with a smirk in his brother's direction. "Adam actually listens for an explanation before running his mouth and Kris is scrupulously honest about everything these days. So Adam never asks if a pair of jeans makes his butt look big, because--"_

_"Because he doesn't have to, because he still has the best butt on the planet!" Kris Allen protests with a glare at Neil._

_"Do not tell me you're talking about butts to a reporter from_ People _magazine!" An older woman exclaims in exasperation as we walk into the music room where she is searching for a cd. "Do not tell me that!" Leila Lambert introduces herself and apologizes, "I want it to be known that I raised those two boys better than that and so did Kim Allen. They are on their own!"_

_Seeing her stack the cds, I apologize for arriving early -- for once the Los Angeles traffic was on my side. Danielle brushes my apology away. "Don't worry. Adam's always ready for his close up, Ms. DeMille."_

_"I heard that!" Adam calls out._

_"Good." Kris touches his husband's arm. "Because what she meant is that you're always beautiful."_

_"Awww." Danielle Stori smiles at Kris, who is getting a kiss from his husband, while she swats her eye-rolling husband._

_"What's worst about all this?" Neil tells me, "Is that they're like this all the time. It's not being put on for your benefit. Yuck."_

_"Ha." Adam laughs. "Like you don't worship the ground Dani walks on and have since you were about ten years old. She's been your one goal in life since you discovered that girls were more interesting than your action figures."_

_Neil blushes furiously and everyone breaks into teasing laughter._

_It's clear that the dynamics are well-worn and comfortable for everyone. Everyone being the five adults and four children that comprise this unique family unit. Speaking of which, I stop to view a large family photo in the room. Kris identifies each person, clad in remarkable and elaborate costumes. The photo was taken in Venice the previous year on the annual family reunion trip to Venice taken every year on their wedding anniversary. He notes without any discernible bitterness that Geoffrey Brush is his contribution to the grandfather quota for the family and that his biological father is not part of their lives. Proving, he says softly, that family is like love -- you make it._

_The music room is a space I expected to see in a home with two professional musicians. But what I did not expect was the focal point of the room -- a large orange glass chandelier. Orange. Did I mention it was large? And orange?_

_"Bigger is better!" Kris says with a grin, obviously seeing my surprise._

_"Kris has... size envy," Adam retorts with a grin of his own. "We had it designed for us in Murano, in Venice. It's Murano glass. Hand-made..." Adam points out, reaching a hand up to flick the danglers dangling from the curves. "Kris likes orange."_

_"We had it commissioned to celebrate our marriage," Kris explains. He wraps his arms around Adam's waist for a hug and kiss to the base of his neck._

_"Is that a mushroom?" I ask, pointing up towards the chandelier._

_"Yes." Danielle smiles. "Kris used to have this ugly mushroom chair, which has since been banished... elsewhere. The little glass mushroom is in remembrance of it."_

_The adults take me through a huge eat-in kitchen and out through expansive glass doors to an amazing patio and pool area, passing by Leila Lambert's compact cottage before we re-enter the center of the house. Once again hearing music and the sound of girlish laughter, I am taken aback when I enter room that truly fulfills a realtor's promise of a home theater in that it actually has its own stage, complete with heavy velvet curtains with gold fringe and its own wardrobe room nearly as large as the seating area. It must be the envy of half of Hollywood and anyone with an ounce of drama in their veins. A quartet of blonde girls of various sizes beckons me in and tries to coax me to join in while the adults watch with a mix of indulgence and caution._

_"I'll run the light show!" A tall girl with dark blonde hair and a remarkable resemblance to her mother, Danielle, calls out with a grin. "Because I'm the oldest and the best at it."_

_"Emmaline!" A chorus of adult voices admonishes her._

_"Well, I am the best because I'm the oldest and have way more experience, so it only stands to reason..." Emmaline stops abruptly when the combined stares of no less than four parental units and one grandmother proves too much. She grimaces. "I have way too many parents. I can't get away with_ anything _. It's_ totally _unfair. I think you should write_ that _in your story."_

_"Oh puh-leeze," a tall girl with strawberry blonde hair admonishes. Aurora, named -- as she tells me quickly with an amused glare in Adam Lambert's direction -- not in honor of Sleeping Beauty, but for the sunrise, sighs loudly. "She gets away with everything because she's the oldest!"_

_"She doesn't get away with everything," Danielle corrects. "She's older so she has more privileges."_

_"But I also have more responsibilities!"_

_"With great power comes great responsibility," Adam and Neil Lambert intone in unison._

_Serena giggles. "Spiderman! Emmaline is like Spiderman anyway."_

_"How so?" I ask._

_"I rock climb. When Serrie was little and she watched me do rock climb, it turned out she had bad eyesight and didn't see the lines, so she thought I was like Spiderman." Emmaline explains with a grin in Kris Allen's direction._

_Kris winces and closes his eyes. "She's into all sorts of extreme sports. I blame Adam and Neil for that. Totally. And I'll continue blaming them the day she becomes a stuntwoman and dies in some fiery death."_

_"It'll be okay..." Adam pats Kris on the back._

_"Is that your plan? To become a stuntwoman?" I inquire of Emmaline._

_"If I want to make my DaKiss lose all his hair, yeah." Emmaline smiles impishly. "Or I could be a storyteller."_

_"A writer?"_

_"No. I want to TELL stories," Emmaline explains. "Like how Dakiss goes to schools and teaches them how to express themselves through music? I want to tell stories and teach people how to tell their own stories."_

_"She's taken classes, gone to conferences -- did you know there are storyteller conferences?" Neil Lambert asks with obvious pride. "Even though she insists upon starting every one of her stories with 'Once upon a time.'"_

_"It's the only proper way to tell a story!" Emmaline insists._

_"And they're off..." Danielle says to me_ sotto voce _. "The two of them can argue that point for an hour."_

_"But that would be rude," Emmaline says quickly with a teasing grin in Neil Lambert's direction. Kris Allen muffles a chuckle. "This reporter is here to ask us questions. So, ma'am. what are your questions?"_

_"Do you feel different from other families?"_

_"No," Emmaline, Serena and Ruthie respond. Aurora, however, shakes her head._

_Leila laughs. "Always contrary."_

_"Sure, we_ are _different." Aurora shrugs and then smiles. "We're different because our parents are all still together and get along. That seems pretty unusual to me. How many kids in our classes can say that?"_

_"Well, I don't know." Serena shrugs. "Not like I was taking a poll."_

_"Don't mention poles. It gets the daddies upset!" Ruthie chirps._

_The men groan and Danielle and Leila laugh. Aurora sighs deeply in that way that only tween and teenage girls can sigh and explains, "I went to a friend's birthday party last year and the mom had arranged for entertainment."_

_"In the form of a stripper pole and stripping lessons! For eleven and twelve year olds!" Kris Allen blurts out. "Unfreakingbelievable!"_

_"They went -- all three of the dads -- to the parents' house and had a..." Emmaline paused and then used air quotes. "'Discussion' with the mother. Having the three of them yelling at you is a bad thing. A very bad thing. Rory hasn't been invited back there again."_

_"Big loss," Neil mutters._

_"Like we'd let her go back there," Kris mutters._

_"Emmy's right," Aurora agreed. "Tell your readers that like she said earlier, when you have four parents, you don't get away with a thing. My life is way more strict than anyone else I know."_

_"But we also get way more presents on our birthdays and Chrismakah!" Ruthie points out._

_Serena nods, then turns to the adults and opens her brown eyes wide. "Speaking of Chrismakah, I think Santa should bring us a dog."_

_"Totally!" Aurora agrees._

_The conversation quickly turns to an in-depth discussion of what type of dog would be best, where the dog would sleep and Leila Lambert's insistence on a schedule for walking and most importantly, cleaning up after the dog._

_All too soon, the girls remember their goal of trying to enlist me in their latest dramatic production and I realize that they have distracted me from collecting information for my story. Trying to rein this dynamic group back in, I ask if they have any plans for what they'll be giving their family for the holiday. Emmaline quickly offers up her idea to create a video production telling the story of how their family came to be._

_"That sounds like a fascinating project," I offer. "How would you start out that story?"_

_"Yeah, Emmy!" Ruthie claps and climbs onto her mother's lap. "Tell the story to the reporter. Practice on her."_

_"Do you mind?" Emmaline asks._

_"Not at all. In fact, can I use some of your story in mine -- if I credit you?"_

_"As long as you credit her," Neil Lambert asserts. "I'll be looking at the article copy to make sure you do."_

_When I nod, Emmaline smiles and waits for everyone to settle down in what is clearly another family ritual before beginning. "_ C'era una volta... _" She stopped and waited._

_"Once upon a time!" The family chorused in response, obviously another ritual._

_"_ C'era una volta _..." I pause. "Wasn't the title of Adam Lambert's fifth cd?"_

_"Yes. The one he made after taking time off when we had two babies -- Rory and Serena -- in a row." Danielle smiled. "It was a double album because he had so much music to sing, so many stories to tell himself."_

_"But it's Emmaline's turn to tell the story," Adam said with a smile as he smiled down at Kris, who was stroking the palm of his hand._

_"No. You start," Emmaline bantered back. "Start with how you two met."_

_"Oooh, that's my favorite," Serena whispers._

_"Me too!" Aurora agrees._

_"Yes. Tell about the thirty-eight cents! Like over our door," Serena adds, unwittingly explaining at least the coins over the green door._

_Adam and Kris look at each other and smile. In unison, they begin, "Once upon a time, a man walked into a coffee shop and..."_

 

And... they truly did live happily ever after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading my story. Hope you enjoyed it!


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